A/N: Ok I know I have been slow but I'm trying. And sorry if I do make Trish seem like that but like she's over John and she likes matt and she's afraid that She might leave Matt for John… confusing I know lol just read.

"Stacy I'm telling you, it was him!" Trish told her friend. She told Stacy all about John and now about seeing him.

"Don't worry, you're over him right? Anyway you have Matt!" Stacy patted her friend's back. Trish shrugged as she reached Matt's room.

"Yeah I guess but…it's such a coincidence." Trish forced a smiled and knocked on Matt's door.

"I'm gonna go, tell me if you hear from John again!" Stacy said and hurried away. Matt opened the door.

"Hi Honey! I want you to meet someone!" Matt said and pulled her into his room. He kissed her on the cheek and gestured towards the sitting room. "He's new here and I bumped into him in the hallway, they weren't done with his locker room so I offered for him to stay with me. Trish this is John, and John this is my wonderful girlfriend I kept talking about, Trish." Matt introduced. Trish stared at John coldly.

"John." She said and turned away.

"Hello." John said and sighed. Matt stared.

"Do you uh…know each other?" Matt asked. Trish glanced at John.

"Yes."

"No." John and Trish said at the same time. Trish sighed, she didn't want Matt to know how close she was with John because then he might assume that she wanted to be with him. And John was hoping that Matt would assume that she wanted to be with him because he still had feelings for her.

"Trish…" Matt warned.

"Fine! We were good friends." Trish said and crossed her arms. John smirked.

"It's not polite to lie to your own boyfriend!" Matt glanced at Trish.

"Ok we were like brothers and sisters." Trish lied again.

"Patricia…" Matt warned even more.

"Fine!" Trish gave up. "Me and John" Trish was cut off by John standing up, and putting an arm around Trish.

"We were thick as this." John crossed his fingers just like the day Trish was leaving. "We were a couple, dated, and loved each other and in fact…" John glanced at Trish's neck. "That necklace," John gestured toward the pearl necklace around Trish's next. "Went back into my family." John finished. Matt stared at them for a while.

"Wow." He said finally as he jealously put his arm around Trish, accidentally knocking John off. Trish smiled at Matt, gratefully. "Well maybe I should give you alone time to catch up…" Matt said turning around.

"No!" Trish was about to shout but Matt was already gone. Trish turned to John and glared at him. "John you came to ruin my life didn't you? To get me away from my boyfriend, whom I love very much, may I add?" Trish said and laid onto Matt's bed. John frowned, wondering why he did that.

"Trish I had no intentions of seeing you ever again since the fourth year flew by, you never return my letter, called even once or visited like you promised! You've changed so much! What happened to the Patricia that I loved?" John questioned Trish. Trish sat up.

"Like it matters where the Trish you loved went, I'm with Matt hardy and I hope to have a family with him one day, and until that day comes I'm gonna stick wit him. John it's not about you! I want Matt, Matt wants me it fits perfectly! Things were so good when you were gone!" Trish sighed, becoming a little emotional. John sighed.

"Trish, I know that I don't own you, I just thought you should know that if you get roses, love letters or chocolates, they'd be from me. I mean, when I bumped into you in the hallway the other day, I was so happy. But when you called me a jackass and went all moody, I was thinking ok she has no idea who it was. But when you realized that it was me you were moodier than ever before. And it hurt Trish it really did. I would change my whole life for you, I'd rather die than be without you. But what hurts the most is that you have no trust in me, that you have no confidence in me, you, or us. And that you'd never love me again. " John said and walked out of the room right after he wiped away a single tear. Trish sat there on Matt's bed for about ten minutes, trying to figure out what hit her. Was he right? What had happened to the old her? Did she still have feelings for John? Did she trust him? Would she leave Matt for him? Trish stood up and she came up with answers. She decided that all the answers were no.

----

Trish forces herself not to cry as she read the letters she kept locked in her jewelry box. Letters from John. She sighed. He was so sweet. Every letter sealed with love. There were so many. She kept them because she wanted to move on which she wouldn't admit now, but it took her about three years to actually enjoy dating other men who weren't John. Trish sniffled as she read another one.

Dear Trish,

How come you haven't been writing? I've missed you so much! I need to talk to you! Badly. My mom's…gone. I was gonna buy you tickets to fly down for the funeral. I don't know if you read my last letter or not but damn I'm in a living hell! First you leave me then the one woman who actually loved me. I feel horrible, you know that I love you and all but I spent more time with you than I did with her. Oh God! I need you baby! PLEASE VISIT! There's something I need to talk to you about. I can't stop crying, I don't even know if I want to go to college anymore. Please call me; I love you for ever and always.

Love with all my heart, John.

Trish smiled, she couldn't believe that John's mom was gone. Trish sat there and thought of the good times with her, not that she spent a lot of time with her. Trish should have read these a long time ago. Trish stood up and slipped all of the letters into her jewelry box. She had to find John. She was craving him even though she was with Matt. John was the kind of guy that everyone hated to fight with. Trish ran down the hall. There, John stood in the hall flipping through a book, not watching where he was going. Trish was running really fast and crashed into him.

"SORRY!" Trish said as she gathered his book, she glanced at the covered and laughed. It was titled 'Ways to get a Girl'

"It's ok." John said and grabbed the book.

"Listen, John we need to talk." Trish said quietly. John glanced down at her.

"Sorry did you say something? I'm not used to you talking to me in a quiet and calm tone." John rolled his eye and began to walk away.

"John" Trish grabbed his shoulder and turned him around.

"What?" He asked, pulling away.

"I'm sorry." Trish mumbled. John raised his eyebrow.

"For what?" He asked, seeming suspicious.

"Your mom." Trish said, looking down. John's eyes widened. He walked into his room but held the door for Trish, inviting her in. Trish slowly made her way into the room and sat on Matt's bed.

"How…how did you find out?" John asked as he got himself comfortable on his bed.

"I uh, kept the letter but I haven't read them until now." Trish explained quietly. John nodded as his eyes filled with tears.

"Yeah, car accident." John said and hid his face in his pillow. Trish rushed over to his and hugged him from the back.

"I'm so sorry, right now I really regret everything I have done this past week, I wish I read those letters." Trish said, beginning to cry also.

"Friday's the fourth year anniversary, I'm flying to California to be with family and we'll go to the cemetery, your more than welcome to join." John said as he calmed down a little bit. Trish nodded.

"Yeah I think I should, after avoiding you for five years, I owe you a favor." Trish said as she hugged John.

"John listen," Matt came in and saw the two hugging.

"Matt it's not what it looks like." Trish said, quickly letting go of John, John let go of her and she fell off of the bed.

"It looks like to me, that you are friends again." Matt smiled and began to laugh at Trish. Trish smiled as she got up and kissed Matt. He didn't doubt her and that felt good.

"Listen uhh…on Friday I'm gonna fly down to California with John because his mom passed away five years ago, and it's the anniversary and all, I hope you don't mind." Trish quickly explained. Matt smiled.

"The only thing I'd care about is missing you but I understand." Matt said as he hugged Trish. "But you need to be back on Wednesday." Matt said. Trish frowned.

"Why Wednesday?" Trish asked. Matt smiled.

"Isn't it supposed to be the men who forget? It's out fifth year anniversary!" Matt exclaimed.

"OH!" Trish smiled. "Sorry, I've been distracted lately."

"I know." Matt said. "But I want you to go and have a good time." He told Trish. "I need to meet Jeff. See ya both soon." Matt said and walked off. Trish glanced at John who forced a smiled. They were both thinking the same thing, 'What a long ride I was going to be.'