I don't own the song. It's the Beetles song Blackbird...off of the White Album

Please R&R

The rest of the week, I showed Lucy around my neighborhood and she got to meet my friends.

I only had one week left here before I would have to return back to Glen Oak.

I wanted to show Lucy the happy things about living here. I wanted her to walk away with a piece of mom… I wanted her to know why I loved my mom so much and why it was so hard to let go.

When Aunt Susan got off on Sunday morning we went to church, and I showed Lucy the class my mom had taught.

We walked into a room full of cribs and rockers.

I said," This was mom's class."

Lucy asked," What did she do? It's just babies."

I said," She loved them, she held them close, and she made them feel safe. The world couldn't hurt them while she was holding them. It was the same way with me. The world couldn't hurt me as long as she was around; I was always safe in her arms. That's why I'm scared…There's no one left to protect me."

Lucy said," Yes there is. Sarah, you aren't alone."

I said," Maybe not, but I feel alone. Safety comes with trust, and it's hard to trust someone who walked out on you."

Lucy said," I know. I love you though, and I want you to trust me. I want you to know that you can tell me anything and I will never let you go. Okay?"

I walked out of the room and stood at the window. I closed my eyes and stood there imagining my mom sitting in a rocking chair with a baby in her arms softly singing Blackbird. The same way I remembered in my childhood.

FLASHBACK:

Slowly rocking back and forth. The soft squeaks of the chair. Then her voice would fill the dark, quiet room:

Blackbird singing in the dead of night,

Take these broken wings and learn to fly.

All my life,

I've been waiting for this moment to arise.

My eyes would weigh heavy and I would drift off to sleep safe and warm in her arms.

END OF FLASHBACK

Lucy was standing beside me. She said," Are you okay?"

I shook my head yes and said," I think I want to go back to the apartment. I can't do this."

Aunt Susan said," Okay, come on."

We went back to the apartment and sat around.

I was lying on Aunt Susan's bed muffling my tears in the pillow with the blanket pulled up over my head.

I felt someone sit down beside me, and then someone rubbed my back before pulling the covers back away from my face.

Aunt Susan said softly," Roll over and look at me." I rolled over with tears pouring from my eyes.

She asked," Why are you crying?"

I just asked," Can you sing it?"

She said," Sarah, she's not here to sing it with me. I know you really want to hear her sing it."

I asked," Please, just sing it?"

She lay down beside me and pulled me into her arms. She kissed my temple and sang," Blackbird singing in the dead of night,

Take these broken wings and learn to fly.

All my life,

I've been waiting for this moment to arise."

Then we laid in each others arms until I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up later and Lucy was sitting on bed beside me. She said," I know why you wanted me to come here. I understand now."

I sat up and asked," Why do you think I brought you here?"

She said," Because you have memories of mom from your entire life, and I don't. You're trying in your own way to show me who mom was and what she wanted of us all. How she wanted us to be together and how much she wanted to love us. And how much alive she still is to you. I know Sarah. I know how much mom loved me; I loved her just as much. I hate that I lost the chance to love her all those years and that I missed out on watching you grow up and getting to be your big sister. But I know how much she loved me and you and how much you love her. She was my mom too Sarah, and I missed out a lot not having her around. I wish I could take it back, but I can't, but I do have another chance with you. Let me in and let me love you. Come home with me and give us another shot. It's what mom would want."

I asked," You really think so?"

She said," All mom wanted for us was to be happy, healthy, and loved… we love you Sarah. Give us another try."

I shook my head and hugged her as I said," Okay. I'll come home and give it another shot."