Out into the game hub they flew, Vanellope, Ralph, and the entire squad, horns blaring, sending square-faced 'Net avatars scurrying for safety. They dove down the imposing staircase that led out to the Internet world, tires rumbling on the jagged decline.
From behind, Vanellope heard an all-too-familiar engine roar. She glanced back - Shank was out of the game, still gaining on them.
"Guy-y-y-ys!" Vanellope stuttered, bouncing as her tires battled with the stairs. "We-e-e got-t-t com-m-mpany-y-y-y!"
Seconds later, they came barreling out into the bright electric blue streets of the Internet. Calhoun and Felix's cruiser soared high above, narrowly dodging a line of hyperlink transports, as the racers spun out on the slick ground, trying to regain their bearings.
"Back to the homepage, kids!" Calhoun bellowed, Sour Bill still clinging desperately to her ankle. "This way!"
Vanellope and Ralph flailed as the racers around them took off. With a gasp, Vanellope saw Shank burst out of the game hub entrance, landing directly in front of them.
Finally, traction returned, and Vanellope hit the gas hard. Shank tore up behind, gaining on them. They weaved through the crowd of virtual Netizens, the website structures around them becoming a blur.
Shank's eyes flashed with fury as she drew inches away from Vanellope's rear bumper. "I don't know if you picked up on this yet or not, Vanellope," she snarled, "but I don't like to lose!"
Her finger hovered over a button on her dashboard - a button that would unleash a boost of nitrous into her engine. The speed boost would be more than enough to ram Vanellope off the road. Vanellope and Ralph winced, preparing for the worst…
But instead, it was Shank's car that jolted, its rear wheels bouncing off the ground as a massive airborne craft flew in low and plowed it from behind. Skidding to the side, losing speed, Shank glanced up furiously and recognized Yesss' personal transport, soaring just yards above the concourse, Maybe at the wheel.
Ralph and Vanellope cheered. "Way to go, Yesss!" Vanellope laughed, punching the air triumphantly.
Drawing level with the driver's side of Shank's car, the craft dipped 45 degrees starboard, and Yesss lowered her window, giving Shank a steely judgmental look. "Y'know, Shank, honey," she called over the rush of the wind, "I told everyone you were real deal cool, but kidnappin' kids? Sorry, but I'm gonna have to unfriend you."
"I NEED HER, YESSS!" Shank screamed, all pretense of her unflappable demeanor completely lost.
"No, you need to chillax, is what you need," Yesss smirked. "I think someone oughta show you a little bit of love."
And with a mischievous grin, she produced a handful of heart upvotes.
Shank's eyes widened. "No-"
"HEART!" Yesss squeaked, doling upvotes liberally out the window. "Heart, heart, heart, heart, heartheartheartheartheart…"
The hearts clung to Shank's face; she struggled to get them off, spitting and flailing. More covered the windshield, obscuring her vision. Her car weaved back and forth drunkenly as Yesss' craft pitched upward.
Struggling to see, Shank jerked the wheel to the left, drawing dangerously close to a long line of Internet avatars. One wandered blissfully away from the crowd, directly into the path of Shank's out-of-control car.
THUMP.
Miles away, Miranda Sings' Internet connection cut out again.
"UGH!" Miranda frowned. "Why does this keep happening to me?"
Windshield wipers squeaking, Shank ripped the hearts out of her face. The racers were gaining ground away from her.
Ralph squinted into the distance. "There's the homepage hub!" he shouted, pointing energetically. "If we can just lose Wonder Woman here, we'll be golden!"
But that was easier said than done. Shank hit the nitro boosters, and her car roared, speeding ahead like a metallic demon. She closed in on Vanellope's kart.
"Aw, come on!" Ralph growled. "Can't anything ever just be easy for once?!"
Vanellope glanced up ahead, at the ramp that led to the homepage. Up above, an email delivery train wound its way through the paths of hyperlink transports.
Suddenly, she had an idea.
"Ralph!" she called. "Take over, buddy!"
Ralph gulped. "Wait, Vanellope, what are you gonna do?!"
She smirked, her ponytail whipping behind her. "I'm gonna make her put the brakes on for a change."
With a VOOP, Vanellope glitched out of the driver's seat. Ralph hastily began propelling the kart with his hands as Vanellope rematerialized yards above, on top of a moving hyperlink transport. Jumping from cube to cube, she shut her eyes and glitched again, onto the nose of Yesss' craft.
"Thanks for the assist, Yesss!" Vanellope called through the windshield.
Yesss lowered her stylish shades and grinned. "You go get 'em, girl!"
Another VOOP, and Vanellope glitched higher still, onto the front cab of the email train, a good ten stories above the chase. She steered it directly over her kart. From high above, she could see Shank was getting closer. She had to time this just right…
Climbing over the back of the cab, between it and the first freight car, Vanellope hung on with both hands, placing one foot over the coupling that held the cars on.
With a final glance down at Shank, she snickered.
"You've got mail!"
She kicked with all her might, and the coupling came undone. The train of freight cars plummeted to the ground, digital letters fluttering away into the wind.
WHAM.
The cars smashed into the concourse, just feet behind Vanellope's kart. Shank barely had a second to react.
She swerved hard to the right, trying to avoid the crash. Tires screaming, she skidded uncontrollably across the slick Internet floor, eyes wide with shock.
With a teeth-chattering crunch, Shank's beloved car collided with an advertisement kiosk. Shank flew out of the driver's seat, thrown clear, landing in a tumbling heap at the edge of a balcony.
Breathing hard, she looked up into the distance just in time to see Vanellope glitch back into her kart. "Shank you very much, sister!" she giggled, as she and her fellow racers disappeared up the ramp to the homepage.
"NO!" Shank cried in desperation. "COME BACK!"
And as she watched them all escape, as she saw Yesss' craft lift off into the sky victorious, she felt a hand pluck the sunglasses off the top of her head. Recoiling in shock, she whirled around.
A long, sweater-wrapped arm retracted into her car. Gord placed the sunglasses on his bulbous head-like stump as J.P. Spamley hopped behind the wheel.
"Thanks for the sweet ride, Shanky ol' pal!" Spamley grinned, cocking his hat jauntily to the side as he backed the vehicle up. "This oughta fetch us a pretty penny or a billion! C'mon, Gord, let's go shopping for that antivirus software we've had our eyes on!"
And as the crimson muscle car peeled away, Shank winced, punching the ground in humiliating defeat.
With a self-important nod, the Surge Protector re-secured the last strip of "Do Not Cross" tape over the WiFi outlet. "There!" he said, turning to face the patrons of Game Central Station who'd stopped to watch him work. "And I hope nobody else gets the bright idea to go racin' around where they don't belong!"
He froze as the sound of revving engines grew steadily closer.
Video game characters dived out of the way as the entire Sugar Rush crew burst through the freshly repaired tape, their kart tires squealing to a halt on the sleek power strip floor. Calhoun and Felix's cruiser soared overhead as Ralph leapt off the back of Vanellope's kart. Vanellope brushed her hair out of her eyes, a thoroughly relieved smile plastered to her face.
Her fellow racers bounded from their karts, screaming in celebration. Swizzle and Gloyd clapped hands and pulled each other into a grateful bro hug, while Jubileena and Adorabeezle jumped for joy, totally unable to contain themselves. "WE DID IT!" Jubileena cheered. "THIS IS THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!"
Vanellope tried to catch her breath as she looked around. All the familiar faces, the transistor benches, the towering electrical outlets adorned with holly and wreaths, the twinkling Christmas decorations that lined the golden ceiling like a finely decorated cake…
She was home.
No sooner had she begun to truly process it than Taffyta, Rancis, and Candlehead smothered her with appreciative hugs. Within seconds, all fourteen of her fellow racers had gleefully piled in, their jubilant chatter almost impossible to discern.
"Whoa, hey, c'mon!" Ralph chuckled, parting the sea of kids with his massive hands. "We just saved the kid's life, let's give her a little bit of breathin' room here!"
Taffyta smiled dearly at Vanellope, her eyes damp with tears. "Vanellope, we are so, so sorry for making you leave!" she gushed in all sincerity. "We should've been better friends to you! We didn't mean to bore you or annoy you or anything like that!"
Vanellope blinked. "Wait a second, what? No, no, guys, you got it all wrong…"
Scrambling a bit, she hopped up onto the hood of her kart, looking around at her friends.
"I'm the one who should be apologizing here," she began, her voice cracking slightly. "You guys didn't drive me away, don't even think that junk - I love you guys to bits, and I always will. I just…" She sighed. "I just goofed up, that's all. I thought I was bored with this whole arcade scene, I thought a new outlook would shake things up for me and make me feel better… But after six years of livin' the good life, I guess I'd forgot just how lucky I really was to have all the really cool stuff I had…"
She glanced up, beyond the crowd, at the outlet to Sugar Rush, decked out in its sparkly green wreath. "Like a great game where I get the chance to make players happy every single day…"
She smiled down at her fellow racers, several of whom were wiping tears away. "Or a buttload of wicked awesome friends who I get to share that game with, who love racing just as much as I do…"
Finally, she turned around, grinning up at Ralph, Felix, and Calhoun, who all smiled right back.
"And you guys. Who are always there for me, and sacrifice so much to keep me safe and happy. I'd do anything for you guys, you know I would."
Vanellope blinked back her tears. "Ralph, you big galoot, you're the greatest friend a dork like me could ever have. Felix, Calhoun, you two are just the sweetest, and you always got my back. I could never skip out on you guys...you're more than just friends..."
She gulped as the tears finally began flowing freely. "You're like my family. And for cryin' out loud, y'know, family should never have to be apart on Christmas."
Laughing through his own tears, Ralph knelt down and swept Vanellope up into a giant secure bear hug. "You don't know how great it is to have you back, Vanellope," he said softly.
Vanellope chuckled. "Eh, I think I got a little bit of an idea."
Calhoun wrapped a tender arm around Felix's little shoulder. "See, Sugarcakes? I told ya we could handle this parenting stuff like champions."
"When you're right, you're right, Snoogumbunches," Felix beamed through blushing cheeks as he snuggled up to his wife.
The Game Central Station atrium rang with applause as Vanellope leapt up onto Ralph's shoulders, waving to everyone she recognized. The Sugar Rush racers erupted into cheers again, jumping up and down in exhilaration.
A lone tear rolled down Sour Bill's unchanging half-lidded face. "Darn it," he drawled in his usual monotone, "the holidays always get me so emotional…"