I opened my eyes to darkness and the regular lurch of the ship. I was sure I had awoken for a reason. I just didn't remember it at the time. I reached to touch my toes before setting my feet on the floor, which set sharp stings running up my ankles. This was the way I woke up every morning, unpleasant though it was. My finger crooked and twisted, sending a small flame to light the candle in the corner. I could see the dim interior of my room now, and fingered my scar as I looked into a small mirror.

A knock came at the door. "Zuko?" I smiled to myself. Amara. She had woken me up every day for a week; I should have been used to it by now. At least she said my name without hesitation by that time. Since she had learned her lesson the first day, she said cautiously, "Are you decent?"

I looked down at myself. I was wearing what I always wore to bed: loose trousers and no shirt. "No, but how is the weather?" I said brightly. I felt alright today. There hadn't been anything unsettling to happen for quite some time; Lon had received as many lashes as was legal (which, as it turned out, were four dozen in number), and the rumors about Amara and I had reportedly settled down.

She sighed, and I heard her lean against the wall outside. "The sky was clear, last time I checked. Are you going to be dressed any time soon?"

I pulled on my uniform quickly, and opened the door. She was holding a tin tray of two fried eggs, and handed it to me curtly. I made my way passed her as smoothly as possible - the hallways on a ship were never intended for two-way traffic - and started walking down the hall. She fell in step behind me, and together we made our way to the infirmary.

"Good morning, Zuko. Good morning, Amara," Kiri said in a small voice as we walked in. "I'm happy to see you both. What's on the agenda for today?" I was beginning to accept the fact that she did everything very, very timidly.

"Actually, Kiri, this is the part where sailing becomes boring." I sat on one of the hammocks, holding myself as steadily as possible with the gentle rocking of the calm sea, and started eating.

Amara lifted her sister up and sat directly under her. I shook my head and repressed the sudden urge to take Kiri's place. The older smiled at me, and said, "I don't like it here, you know. No solid earth around me to take my bearings. I feel like the thing's going to capsize with every lurch. You're not very good at keeping passengers entertained, are you?"

"Technically, you two aren't passengers. Amara, you're my steward, and Kiri, you'll be helping her once you're healthy again." Halfway done, I handed my plate to the slight girl, who smiled her thanks shyly. "We would have something to do with ourselves if we had any leads on the avatar, but until then, we'll keep in sight of the coast and look for signs of the Fire nation army."

"Why?" Amara asked out of the silence that greeted those words. Kiri was trying to bury herself in her blanket.

"Why are we skirting the coast? We need to be able to see if there is a battalion nearby or not."

"No, why are you looking for the Avatar?" I didn't know, until that moment, that it was even possible to pronounce a capital letter. "What has he ever done to you?"

"I need to capture him in order to be welcomed back at court," I answered curtly, laying back and staring at the ceiling. I heard a single, preparatory sound, as though Amara was about to say something, but Kiri shushed her. I wouldn't have answered any more questions on that subject, had they even been asked.

Amara huffed and spat at me, "So, we'll just rot on this damned ship until you kill him for you own useless ends? You're a selfish pig."

I think, for a moment, no one even breathed. I spent the time wondering how in the world every single encounter I had with Amara turned into an argument. It was like magic, or clockwork. I slowly pulled myself to my feet, walked stiffly to the door, and threw over my shoulder, "I wouldn't kill the avatar." And I shut the door with a quiet click behind me.

I moved as if in a daze, along that corridor, down the ladder, to the deck below, again and again, until I came to the ballast chamber. It was filled with settled iron, which could be heated, melted, and shifted to a different balance at the sign of trouble. I took a deep breath in, tried to calm down, and slammed my fist against the hard metal floor. At least I was working on my temper; I had held it in for almost five minutes. I gritted my teeth and hit the floor again, harder. I needed a new anger management plan.

I breathed deeply in through my nose, and slowly let it out. I took off my shirt, and moved into the first position of my Burning Spirit kata. With studied motions, I went through each stance, each attack, and each defense. When you have been raised to discipline, it is an easy fallback to free your mind. I ran the whole form, and thought about things. What had happened took very little time. What had led up to it, however, did not.

Amara and Kiri knew about the avatar. I understood that they would not want to tell me about him, but to insult me instead? It wasn't as bad as it had sounded to me, I corrected myself. They didn't know how odd my involvement in this search was. If I did not find him, I would not be reinstated as a true Prince of the Fire nation. So, his capture spelt my salvation. But I hadn'timagined that Imight be the one to kill him.

I moved straight from Burning Spirit to Caged Flame, picking up speed as my thoughts turned vehement.

After all, it was a double-edged sword. If anyone else brought him in, my efforts would have been wasted. In all truth, to be caught by me would be the better fate for him. I, at least, would not allow him to be killed. And then, without any of the facts, Amara assumed that I was like every other general or admiral just out for the copious bounty my father had put on the avatar's head.

With every movement, a jet of fire spouted, and they were building up in a sort of whirlwind around me. I suddenly noticed how quickly I was moving and pulled myself up short. The flames around me died almost instantly, and I saw Amara backed against the far wall with wide eyes. I self-consciously retrieved my shirt and pulled it on. I opened my mouth to say something, realized that I had no idea what to say, and closed it again. I found myself only staring at her, shocked, and I almost felt naked. It is an odd thing to do something so easily in tandem with others and then be exposed in front of an audience.

"That…was…" Amara started to say, but she trailed off. My mind was still blank. Whatever happened, it was not going to be good. "That was…beautiful."

I didn't know what to say to that, so I didn't jinx anything by opening my mouth.

Amara looked down, blushing. Her hair, looking almost brown instead of dark blond in the low light, covered her face in a curtain. In a small voice, she said, "I'm sorry."

"What?" I had no idea where that had come from.

She lifted her head to glare at me. "I'm not saying it again."

Of course she wouldn't. "I meant…Sorry for what?"

Now she looked somewhat guilty. "For what happened in the infirmary. Kiri scolded me. I don't know what your reasons are for this little fanatical-" She broke herself off, closed her eyes, and continued, "I don't know your reasons for your search."

"Well…" I ventured, cautiously, "I wasn't…forthcoming with the information." I wasn't any good at apologizing, either. We might have had something common, despite the underlying tension. "Do you remember what you heard about how I got this scar?" I ran my hand over it as a force of habit.

"The one about the boy that was forced to become a man at the wrong end of a flame?"

I sighed. "It was a duel. In a firebender's duel, there is a winner…and a corpse. I shouldn't theoretically be alive. Instead, Father merely exiled me and told me that I can't set foot on Fire nation soil without the avatar in tow."

"Your father…"

"…was the one that did this to me." I saw that she was shocked, and attempted a smile. "Did you think that any but the Fire Lord himself could beat me?" She rolled her eyes, reassured, and started to move toward the ladder that led to the higher decks. I didn't want her to. It was an almost pleasant moment, down in the dim ballast chambers. I couldn't think of anything to keep her, though, and reluctantly started moving also.

Without warning, she turned around in a rush and threw her arms around my neck. Very, very confused, it was all I could do to stay on my feet. When she stepped back, everywhere she had touched felt colder than before. "That was for Hao and Lon a few days ago. It scared me, not knowing what they could have managed to do between themselves. So…thank you."

"Y-you're welcome," I stuttered.

She caught my wrist in a strong grip, and inspected it critically. "You're bleeding." I looked down, too, and saw what little light there was reflecting off a trail of dripping blood. It must have happened when I punched the ground, though it didn't hurt at all.

"It's nothing, don't worry about. I didn't notice." I didn't pull my hand away; indeed, each of my senses seemed to become more perceptive. Her aroma was sweet, yet unlike anything I had smelled before; the light pooledand addedflickering highlights to her dark blond hair; the fingers pressed securely into my wrist spread a focused heat along my skin; her raw emotion showed in her voice with every syllable. For a long, breathless moment, I wondered what she tasted like. I leaned closer to her, and she looked at me curiously. She smiled, trying to diffuse the tension that had sprouted between us.

"I guess it's not so bad. If it doesn't hurt, I mean." Her voice rang outlike abell, clearing my mind of the euphoric haze her touch had brought. I shook my head, dropped my hand, and shifted my weight back, seeming to break the spell. She turned around hurriedly to grasp the unforgiving metal of the ladder which led above decks.

With her foot on the first rung, she smiled at me and said teasingly, "Don't look, Zuko, I can't climb well in a dress." Grateful that the low light hid my reddened cheeks, I turned away. She had managed to lighten the mood, at least. As she stepped up each successive rung, I thought about how much things had changed between us. We had gone from shooting daggers to joking insults. My, how time changes all things.

When we reached the infirmary, I took my previous spot on the hammock, and Amara the visitor's stool. Kiri gave us both furtive glances, and when she turned back to Amara with raised eyebrows, her older sister gave her a wide-eyed look and Kiri looked back at me in disbelief. I didn't know what had been communicated. I chalked it up to a girl thing.

"Well, much fun though the last hour has been," I stretched, stood up, and saw Amara judiciously avoiding eye contact, "my ship sometimes requires me. One of the risks of command, I fear." They waved farewell, I nodded mine, and the door clicked discreetly shut behind me. Instead of leaving, though, I waited to see what they had to say about me. I was, admittedly, curious.

Kiri said quietly, but with no small amount of disbelief, "What did you do?"

Amara coughed delicately, and I knew that she had turned toward a wall. "Nothing happened, so you can stop looking at me like that."

"When you cough like that, Sister, your words areworth a waterbender's promise."

Clothes resettled; Amara had turned back to her sister in a hurry. "You told me to apologize, so I did."

"I said to make sure he was okay, Ama," Kiri scolded quickly.

"You leave me alone!" They both laughed, and I let slip a smile.

"So," Kiri said once they had calmed down, "did you two even kiss?"

Amara sounded scandalized. "There was a moment that I thought he would… But no, we didn't." There was a thoughtful pause. "Why would we?"

"Isn't it obvious?" She sounded just as Uncle had mere days before. What was it that everyone could see but me and, apparently, Amara? "You like him." Kiri had the knack of saying it like wedding bells. I forgot how to breathe for long enough to worry me, and, by the strangled sound from the other side of the door, so did Amara.

"No, I don't! Kiri, you know me, I hate firebenders!"

"Zuko isn't just any firebender. He's the first one you've ever gotten to know. You just choose to fight rather than befriend him."

"I'm older than you; you can't act like a reprimanding teacher! He sees me as part of his crew, and therefore as insignificant. You heard him, 'Technically, you two aren't passengers.' Bastard."

"Be patient. You know boys are stupid."

"I'm denying everything at this point, thank you."

I leaned forward, totally absorbed in their conversation in spite of myself. Conveniently, the door slowly, painfully slowly, creaked inwards, and I fell flat on the floor of the infirmary.

Sometimes life had it out for me. I froze instantly, horrified. I had been discovered by my own fault. What their faces must have looked like, I didn't dare imagine. I could feel their shocked stares boring into me.

I shot to my feet, backed out of the room, and, just before I shut the door, said as fast as possible, "For the record, I deny it all, too."

And then, for the second and final time that day, I closed the infirmary door. This time, I raced above decks and threw myself into the consuming focus of command. Hopefully, it would be enough to distract me from my horrified embarrassment.

"I just don't understand, Uncle." I was swirling my ginseng tea around in its cup, on my knees, across the low table from my mentor.

"And what are you grousing about now?"

I glared at him, opened my mouth, caught myself, and inspected my drink once more. "How do adults do it?"

He chuckled and winked suggestively. "Well, now, I thought this would come up sometime. When a man and a woman love each other very, very much, they want to be close to each other…"

"Uncle, no! That's not what I meant, and you know it!"

"Oh? Then be a little more specific, Prince Zuko."

I paused to work out how to phrase the question in my mind, and said, "How do adults carry on friendships after something…say…mind-numbingly embarrassing happens? How can they talk to each other ever again without every bad thing that's ever happened parading through their heads?"

"Of course they remember it all. Here, look at me." I obediently raised my head to meet his eyes. "Now, do you remember when you refused to wear clothes for a week? How you ran around the castle like that?"

"I was four. I don't remember that, Uncle."

"I do. Rather clearly. Ozai was in quite a snit over it. Conduct unbecoming a prince of the Fire nation, or some such."

"Um…alright." I had no idea where he was going with this

"My point being, I don't bring that up every time I see you, do I?" I shook my head. "You see?"

"I think so. You mean that, even though it's going to run through my head every time I see either of them, I shouldn't mention it?"

He raised his eyebrows, and leaned forward to set his elbows on the low table between us. "Now I'm genuinely interested. What happened?" I must have looked guilty, because he added, "What did you do?"

"I…was eavesdropping on a conversation about me, between the two girls. I was discovered," I rubbed my scar irritably as his grin widened immeasurably, staring at my red-clothed knee, "and I don't think I'll ever live it down."

"It will pass, as all things do. I suggest an apology. Some things may seem important now, but in a little while they will all be inconsequential. So," Uncle leaned forward perceptibly, chuckling, "anything new from your little adventure into subterfuge?"

"Nothing productive." I was reluctant to tell him, oddly. He had always been my confidante; I trusted him with my life.

"You said that they spoke of you," he goaded. "What did you overhear?"

"Nothing productive," I repeated, not meeting his eyes. I was sure that they would reflect only hurt back to me.

"…Very well, Prince Zuko. It was not my place to ask." I heard it in his voice - the uncomfortable shift from friendly to formal, from gentle prying to staunch respect. Uncle had taken that tone with me more often than not in my childhood, before we had embarked on my exile together and grown closer than I had ever been with anyone. It pained me, like a stabbing toothache, and I winced.

We looked at each other for three heartbeats, and I couldn't say what emotion was visible on my face. I debated it in my mind hurriedly. He opened his mouth to say something, but I blurted out in a rush, "I heard that Kiri thinks that Amara likes me but Amara doesn't. She hates me. She hates all firebenders."

"Ah!" Uncle nodded sagely, seeming to forget the previous awkward silence. "Did she say she hates you specifically, or just all firebenders?"

I tried to think."Just all firebenders, maybe. It doesn't matter. I'm a firebender, and, therefore, she hates me."

"Not so, Prince Zuko. Listen to your own words; perhaps she does not hate the part of you that is not a firebender?"

"Am I not all firebender? It is better that I've been banished and my father can't hear you say that."

"I meant your personality, boy. Don't play stupid with me. Perhaps she likes you for you?"

I blinked, giving him a disbelieving glare. Kiri, I was sure, had said almost the exact same thing… "Now, why in all the many and varied levels of my personal hell would she do that?"

"That's not the issue we've come here to discuss."

"What do you mean? I came here to ask you about continuing relationships, not whether or not Amara likes one part of me but not the other. It doesn't even make sense to me. She can't just like parts without fire, because the fire burns through every atom of my being. It doesn't make sense at all!"

"Would it be so terrible if an earthbender liked you?" He smiled at me.

"She doesn't like me, and I don't like her."

"You're obviously madly in love with her. Can't you at least pretend to have some hope? For the sake of an old man?"

I glared at him, grumbling, "How could you possibly get 'Uncle, help, I'm madly in love with Amara' from 'She hates me'?"

"It's obvious," he waved his hand in front of his face, as though clearing the air. "You like her, she likes you, are we clear? Good. Moving on. What do you intend to do now? We certainly can't continue up and down the coast like this with those girls on board, and you know it. One way or another, the men will get ideas again."

I sighed, too tired to advocate my lack of romantic feelings for Amara. "What do you suggest? We won't find the avatar simply by trudging around in hostile territory."

"You could try to ask Amara and Kiri about the avatar again, and learn where to find him and his Water tribe companions," Uncle suggested helpfully.

I snapped, "I won't be speaking to either of those sisters very soon."

"You won't…" Uncle said, smiling his most deceptive smirk to date, "but I will. I will merely ask them about it. I can be very persuasive."

"Too true, Uncle." I gentled slid my hands over my eyes.