Aside from the possibility of the fight between Kyoko and Sayaka happening today, I honestly wasn't expecting much out of the 7th day of June when I woke up in the morning. And I suppose that in a way, my hunch was correct. But you could also say it wasn't.
In essence, I'd learned nothing from the incident on the 26th of last month. Unfortunately, I wouldn't realize this until I was in too deep to take anything back.
It was a Thursday - and by extension, a school day. Which automatically ruled out the possibility of chatting with Madoka, Sayaka, and Homura until around mid-afternoon. I figured that I probably shouldn't speak to Kyoko anytime soon after what I pulled at the observation deck the previous day, and Mami was… well, you know. Away.
Which mean that it was prime time to go on patrol and wander the city to grind. With that in mind, I polished off breakfast quickly, and left the hotel. I hit the 'play' button on my phone as I made my exit, filling my head with the opening cowbell rings of Loverboy's "Working For the Weekend."
Now that I had been here for three full weeks, I found myself needing my digital map less and less, as I had begun to get used to the setting and the layout of the city. I suppose the uniformity of its construction helped with that, as everything was mostly straight roads keeping to a gridlike pattern. I still needed assistance finding more specific spots, of course, but that's the kind of thing that you only start to get down after a few months.
Anyway, it took surprisingly little time to pick up the trail of a witch. It wasn't very fresh, being about a few days old from what I could tell with my limited experience, but it was something, so I resolved to follow it.
A fair bit of time later, I found myself entering the local park. However, all of a sudden, the traces disappeared. Instead, a new magical signature replaced the previous one - and it felt very familiar.
Wait a second, this is...!
This one was much more recent. If I had to guess, I'd say it couldn't be more than a day old. I debated on whether or not I should follow it, and eventually decided that it couldn't hurt to do so, as long as I stayed a reasonable distance away. With that in mind, I started tracking this new source of magic.
The path led me to sites that I could only assume to be defunct battlegrounds. Of course, they had no physical signs of conflict, but that was a given considering that everything that happened in a labyrinth stayed in a labyrinth, for better or worse. What did remain were magic traces, and I picked up quite a few over the course of the journey.
When I finally decided to call things off and get something to eat, I determined that the signature I'd been following had come into contact with at least five different witches or familiars, all of which were evidently destroyed. Which was frankly insane.
Sheesh. I know we like to have our stress toys, but don't you think this is taking it a bit too far?
I resolved to save my judgement in the end, though. If that was how they wanted to deal with things, then I had to respect that.
Just as long as you don't get yourself killed, 'kay? Cause, y'know, if you did, that'd kinda defeat the purpose of this whole thing.
I continued with my rounds after that.
For the next few hours, nothing of note happened, besides maybe that one familiar I killed. That one was easy mode though, so I don't think I'll go into detail on it.
Eventually, I checked my phone, and saw that school was out. Soon after, I felt the device vibrate.
Messages - 1 (Meduka)
Huh… weird. She couldn't have gotten into trouble that fast. What could she want me for?
'Can you come to the cafe where we first met? There's something I want to talk about with you.'
This was somewhat out of left field, but I sent an affirmative nonetheless and set out. Although, I did make it a point to snag a can of root beer from a vending machine before arriving to protest the spot's lack of soft drink options.
One scene transition later, I pulled open the doors to the establishment and stepped inside, quickly picking out the one head of pink hair in the crowd. When I got closer, however, I saw that she'd brought a plus-one.
"Oh, hey, Homu," I called out. "What're you in for?"
I heard Madoka confusedly mutter "Homu?" while she responded. "I don't know yet. I assume we are about to find out."
I nodded, but found myself unable to move. The place didn't use conventional chairs, and the only two seats offered were occupied, meaning I'd have to sit with one of them. One of my fingers hesitantly came up, unable to come to a decision on who to point at as an "uh…" slipped out of my mouth. "Where do I, ah…?"
"Oh," Madoka mouthed out as she got the message I was conveying. She quickly scooted farther inward, giving me enough room to sit beside her. I muttered a "thanks" as I slid in.
A few moments later, the girl sitting across from us directed her gaze towards the instigator of the meeting. "You wanted to talk?"
"Well…" she began unsurely. "I'm worried about Sayaka. She keeps telling me she's fine, but… I'm not so sure."
A dull clunk rang out as I set my can on the table. "Really? From what I can tell, she's been on top of the world ever since she made her wish."
She shook her head. "I don't think her wish is the problem… it feels more like she's afraid of something else."
"Perhaps bearing witness to Mami Tomoe's near-death experience could be the issue," Homura suggested. "Those kinds of memories have a penchant for staying around."
"That could be it," I agreed. "Lord knows that little fiasco's kept me up for hours these last few nights."
Madoka stared down at her order. "I think you may be right. And… to be honest, I'm also worried that the same thing might happen to her. I know she said she can handle it, but when I think about how Mami could've died just like that if you hadn't been there… I just get so scared."
She looked back up at us. "And that's why… I want you both to look after her. I know that she can be stubborn, and a bit hypersensitive at times, and maybe she likes to argue a little too much..." she trailed off for a moment, before getting back on track. "But she really is a great person! She's kind-hearted, and brave, and she's not afraid to help someone who needs it!"
"All fatal flaws for Magical Girls," Homura rebuffed.
"Oh, don't be such a Debbie Downer," I cut in. "You wanna try and emulate your childhood cartoon heroes, I say go right ahead. You've just gotta make sure it doesn't get to the point where you end up killing yourself for those values."
"And how will you know when to stop?" She countered. "Most don't know how far they've gone until they're staring death in the face, far past the point of no return."
I shrugged. "That's for them to decide. Or their friends. Whoever steps up."
"And if they're not qualified?"
I considered that for a moment, before shrugging again. "Too bad for them, I guess. I doubt nobody would be qualified anyhow. Stupidity and its derivatives are usually pretty easy to spot."
She raised an eyebrow. "So you're saying it's fine to let the fantasies of self-deluding Magical Girls get them killed if nobody can stop them?"
"Kindly refrain from putting words in my mouth, thanks," I bit back with a miffed frown, before pausing and digesting that. "But I suppose that's one way to take what I said. And sad as it is, I'm pretty sure that at least one girl in the world's had that happen to her. I certainly doubt I'd be able to blame them, especially in certain circumstances."
That last line killed that thread of conversation topics, leaving us to sink into silence for a short moment.
"Anyway…" Madoka attempted to pick up where she left off. "Homura, I know you and Sayaka aren't on the best of terms right now, but… I was hoping that you could look past that, and help Audrey protect her. Please, don't try and fight with her like you did with Mami." A hopeful smile crept onto her face as she continued speaking. "I'm sure that if you all joined forces and worked together, then no witch would be able to stop you, and things would be a lot safer for everyone!"
The hand that wasn't wrapped around my drink came up to my chin. "Y'know, she makes a good point, Homu. Strength in numbers is a popular tactic for a reason." My expression then fell a bit. "Then again, we'd also have to consider how to handle the whole Grief Seed issue. Right now, we have you, me, Mami, and now Sayaka running around the city fighting witches. That's four Magical Girls, and by extension, four Soul Gems in constant need of purification. Sure, seed sources aren't exactly in short supply, but at the same time, we don't have a surplus or anything…" My outlook on the prospects became dimmer the more I thought about it. "I mean, yeah, I'll only be here for around a month more, but… I'm kinda doubting that everyone can stay out of the danger zone in terms of gem corruption for very long…"
"What's done is done," Homura stated. "Even if Sayaka shouldn't have been allowed to make the contract, she did so regardless, and she, along with us, must now deal with the consequences of her actions." She solemnly closed her eyes. "I will admit that I am partly to blame for letting her make the mistake of contracting, and that I should have taken greater care in looking after her as I do you, Madoka."
She once again fixed us with a cold, calculating stare. "But this is something you need to understand - just as how the dead cannot be brought back to life, this is a mistake that Sayaka can neither undo, nor recover from. Once someone becomes a Magical Girl, there is no turning back. When we choose to form a contract, we give everything up in exchange for one, single wish. And no matter what we wish for, it always ends the same way - we are thrust into an endless battle filled with despair, regret, and broken pedestals, forced to fight until we inevitably perish or suffer an even crueler fate."
She let that hang in the air for a bit, before delivering her gut-punch of an answer. "I'm not fond of telling lies, and I prefer to avoid making promises that I can't keep. For these reasons, I cannot accept your request, and instead ask that you forget about Sayaka Miki."
"Homura…" I could almost see the tears Madoka was trying to hold back. "You say that like you've given up on all of them… and on yourself."
"I have," she bluntly confirmed. "But there's no use dwelling on it now. I won't make any excuses for myself, or others for our missteps. No matter what sins I must bear, I will continue to fight until the bitter end."
She scooted out of her seat, picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. "If I've wasted your time, I'm sorry." With that, she turned on her heel and began to leave.
I stared at her leisurely retreating form for a moment, before glancing at Madoka while sliding out of my own seat. "Stay here for a second. Don't go anywhere."
Leaving my drink behind, I chased after the black-haired girl, and caught up with her as she was exiting the cafe. "Homura, wait."
She paused, and turned to me with that dead expression still on her face. "What is it?"
"I've been putting this off for long enough." I pulled my phone out, then showcased my contact information. "We should've exchanged numbers much sooner than this."
She quickly caught on, letting out a "right." The trade was soon completed, and she made to leave again.
"Oh, and before you go…" I stopped her, causing her head to swivel back in my direction. "There's a difference between something being impossible, and something being simply improbable. Don't convince yourself that something can't be done just because it doesn't seem doable on the surface." I turned back to the cafe doors, letting my gaze linger on her as I delivered my parting words. "I hope you remember that."
I walked back inside, letting the automatic doors slide shut behind me and leaving the time traveler to contemplate what I'd said.
...ha. I wonder if I'll ever stop being such a huge hypocrite.
The exchange completed, I made my way back to Madoka's table. "Sorry 'bout that, had to do something real fast." I grabbed my can off the table, taking a sip. "So, is there anything else you wanted to say?"
"Oh, ah... yes, actually," she answered, as if her memory had been jogged by my question.
I took the seat that Homura had previously occupied, setting myself down opposite the girl and gestured for her to continue.
"It's about Mami." She reached over to her bag, snapping it open and rummaging around inside. "After we all met up yesterday, I decided to go over to her house to check if she was there." She stopped, apparently having found what she was looking for. "I ended up not seeing her, but I did manage to find this sitting on the table instead." She pulled her hand back up, revealing a folded slip of paper which she offered to me. "I thought you might want to see it."
I took the thing, turning over in my hands and inspecting it from every angle before unwrapping it, revealing what looked like a letter. The handwriting was noticeably elegant, with each character clearly penned with practiced ease and care, obviously written by someone who was fairly dexterous.
Not that I could understand any of it, however. An embarrassed smile spread across my face as I held the note out to Madoka. "Ah… could you read this for me, please? Translator doesn't really work on handwriting…"
Of course, I could've just used my phone, but I wanted to give the girl something to do. And I didn't feel like pulling it back out.
Regardless, she nodded and took it back, holding it up to her sight as she began reciting the contents.
"To whom it may concern,
I deeply apologize for any inconvenience I may cause, but regrettably, this is something that cannot be avoided.
Up to now, the majority of my life has been spent on the battlefield. I have had no time for socializing, or companionship, or anything most other girls would consider "normal." As such, ever since the incident that set me on this path, I have primarily been alone in my journey.
Not for lack of trying, however. There was a time when I had someone that I could call a student. A relative newcomer to my line of work, and someone who could benefit from the guidance of one more experienced in the job. I remember feeling wonderful back then - finally, I had a friend, someone that I could connect with.
Unfortunately, it didn't last. Her actions ended up causing the untimely death of her family, and she became bitter towards the world. Eventually, our ideologies drifted too far apart, and we mutually agreed to end our relationship. I tried to take the news as best I could, yet I couldn't help but feel responsible for letting her stray down the path she'd gone. These feelings culminated in me irrationally blaming myself for happenings that I now realize I had no control over, and I became miserable.
However, I also recognized that it would do no good to let the rest of the world view my feelings, and so, I closed them up. I created the persona that you know as Mami - the cool, dependable, levelheaded senior with all the answers you could ever need. Someone that people could rely on without question, or fear of disappointment.
But now, you know that everything was a lie. Everything from the attitude to the infallible prowess was all nothing more than a facade. A mask, born out of my inability to fully accept the truth, and my unwillingness to deal with the reality of my powerlessness. All because I couldn't handle the stress of nearly dying.
And when I was finally confronted with my weakness without any hope of avoiding it, I shattered. I was completely unable to reconcile my feelings of uselessness, and shut down. I felt like I was utterly worthless, and deserved nothing. Neither pity, nor compassion, or any sort of empathy whatsoever. Once again, I convinced myself that a falsity was real.
But someone changed that. Someone decided that enough was enough, and sat me down for a serious dialogue. Like a blinding ray of truth, they illuminated the darkness and burned away the lies, allowing me at last to see things for what they really were.
And what I saw, I admittedly found lacking. But not unsalvageable.
With their guidance, I was finally able to understand that I was not at all powerless. Yet at the same time, I was not infallible.
However, I also knew that unless I was able to completely convince myself of the real truth beyond a shadow of a doubt, I was going to need a little more proof. Thus, we arrive at the present. Once I finish writing this letter, I will embark on a new journey.
At the moment, I am completely clueless as to how much time it will consume. It could take weeks, or months, or even years. Or it could only last a scant few days. But no matter the distance, I know in my heart where my destination lies.
And I am certain that I will either reach it, and cast away my shackles once and for all… or die trying.
But until that time comes, and I am reunited with those I now know as my dearest friends, whether in the land of the living or the dead…
I implore you - wait for me.
-Mami Tomoe."
Madoka sniffed as she folded the paper back up, and I found myself holding in and blinking back a few tears of my own. Despite that, a smile found its way onto my face.
...I almost can't believe it. It worked. It actually fucking worked. I changed the future! Blonde, if you were here right now, I could kiss you for taking my words to heart! I wouldn't of course, because that would be disgusting, but still! Holy shit!
A giggle even slipped out of my mouth before I caught myself. "Well, whaddaya know? Looks like I actually got through to her." My head came down and my hand caught it, the attached elbow propping it up on the table. "I've been agonizing over how that conversation went these past couple days… you have no idea how good it feels to know it wasn't in vain."
She beamed, two thin clear streaks streaming from her eyes. "We'll wait for her, won't we, Audrey?"
I had to strain myself nearly to the limit to stop my liquid pride from escaping my tear ducts. "Do you even have to ask?"
This… this was a huge win, plain and simple.
Saving Mami from Charlotte could only be considered a pyrrhic victory at best, due to what the experience did to her. But this? This was pure, unadulterated success. And that was a very good sign.
Because it meant that I had an ironclad chance of making it out of this ordeal in one piece. It was tiny, sure, but it was something. And having something is always better than having nothing.
I knew I couldn't sit on my laurels, though. The preceding conversation was proof that Mami was only the beginning. I still had to keep everyone else alive and sane, throughout the rest of my time here. And it sure as hell wasn't going to be easy.
But now that I had confirmation that I'd done something right… this impossible task wasn't seeming so impossible anymore. Now, it was just improbable. And like I'd just told Homura, there was a difference between impossible and improbable.
One couldn't be done. But the other?
Well, it just needed a whole lot of blood, sweat, and tears. And luckily for me… I just happened to know four extremely willing donors.
I just had to get them all on board and keep them there.
A/N: Remember when I implied that this chapter would be the big clash?
Yeaaah, I really need to stop lying about these kinds of things.
So sorry to keep you all waiting, by the way. I got hit with the flu about a week or so ago, and the symptoms combined with dealing with school completely killed any motivation I may have had to work on this. In fact, as I write this author's note, I'm still dealing with a nose that can keep pace with an Olympic sprinter and a throat about as dry as an average desert. But fear not! For I am now on a wonderful thing called winter break, and with that comes a whole lot of free time! Of course, most of it will inevitably be spent on things completely unrelated to this story, but I'll make sure not to forget about it! Besides, I like having an update schedule, and I don't want to lose it again. It gives me pleasure and a comforting sense of structure.
Anyway, as for why this chapter exists in the first place… well, I realized after finishing the last chapter that if I continued with my plan as I had it then, I would end up unintentionally giving Mami the Oscar Pine treatment, in the sense that she would get all her development off-screen. However, because of the terms she and Audrey parted on, I couldn't exactly show her going through the motions of character growth since the story is told entirely through Audrey's eyes, so I had to find a different way to show you, the audience that yes, Mami is making progress. And… I mean, technically the development is still happening off-screen, but at least this way, her eventual return won't come off as that much of a deus ex-machina (and don't start screaming about spoilers, because you all knew she would be coming back, otherwise this would be a very unfulfilling and unsatisfying story). I won't say when she'll pop back in, though. You'll have to stew on that yourselves.
Audrey also finally makes up for the gaffe in chapter 7 and obtains Homu's number. Took her long enough, didn't it? (Y'all can go ahead and forget about how it actually only took four chapters.)
Alright, that looks like everything. Tune in next time, where we finally get to see the two red onis duke it out for the superior set of ideals!
I hope I don't keep you waiting!
