Jacob Henry Canterbury was behaving strangely. Her escort was brimming with the familiar energy of a Brooklyn boy on a hot summer day, all gritted teeth and clenched fists before inevitably a fight occurred. The problem being he wasn't a Brooklyn boy and Audrey wasn't even sure she'd ever even seen Jacob form a proper fist before.
She peeked across the table at him, yet again. Somehow in the shuffle to dinner, the young Audrey Kai and Jacob Canterbury had been separated. Jacob sat next to Oliver and Alva Belmont, calmly listening to the discussion on the functions and habits of the United States House of Representatives. While Audrey found herself next to William Vanderbilt Jr. and the Spanish Diplomat that had been trying to capture her attention all evening.
She reached for her wine, an excellent vintage according to her Spanish admirer, and used the moment of drinking to catalog the servants again. There was not one recognizable bird among the wait staff, though she had spotted at least two familiar faces along the midway and one with the stagehands of the Broadway show Grace had mounted in on her land.
"Is it true you haven't driven the new lane Thomas purchased?" William whispered conspiratorially. Audrey smiled at the mischief in the man.
"Not as of yet, but I think a week into the holiday is all it will take to curry favor."
"But I thought the Longfellows weren't summering this year?" William pressed.
"Not for the whole season, just a couple of weeks." She nodded.
"And how do you intend to curry favor with your staunch guardian?" William teased as Audrey saw an impatience shake through Jacob. She frowned slightly recognizing he was listening to her conversation as well as his own. She hadn't noticed when the young man had picked up her own eavesdropping habit but she was staring at irrefutable proof that he had.
"Thomas is quite fair, I can assure you, sir." Audrey smiled brightly at William, before being pulled to turn around.
"Has Miss Audrey ever been to Toledo, in Spain?" The Diplomat murmured from her right.
"No, I don't believe I have. What kind of place is it?" Audrey genuinely asked. The Spanish noble, a Count if she recalled correctly, had been asking her about cities she may have visited all night. Luckily most of the cities were in Spain, and Audrey could coolly claim to not having spent much time in the man's country. She knew, without a doubt, every ear around them was perked for more information on where the remaining Kai had fled to be raised. Casey had spent weeks last summer drilling a made-up history and Audrey had learned the tale. Casey gave her detailed descriptions of the countryside of Britain, Paris, ships off Southern Italy, and on occasion Vienna but never of Spain. Audrey wondered briefly if Casey or Thomas had ever been to Spain.
"Magical. It is a place of castles and history…" He began before the servants moved as one to clear the table of the final dessert bowls. Dinner was coming to an end, and the guests out on the piazza were starting to meander down to the show folks on the lawn beyond. In a graceful attempt to avoid the attentions of the Spanish Count, Audrey excused herself with some murmurs of a loose thread or wobbly heel. She smiled reassuringly at Jacob before slipping into the house, effortlessly escaping notice.
The young lady wandered through the corridors, barely being acknowledged by scurrying servants, until finding a dark room with doors that would open to the porch that wrapped around the cottage. A few lanterns sat on the banisters, but not enough that even the servants believed the guests might remain here long. Quietly and with quick glances in every direction, she stepped back out into the night.
The stillness was startling but welcoming and Audrey stepped out of her slippers before sliding across to the banister and leaning forward to inhale deeply. She recited the facts, gossip, and whispers she had caught through the evening in her head. Things about international politics, commerce, divorces, and affairs, the kind of bits and pieces a regular bird might get in three weeks, Audrey had managed to collect in one evening. If only she could be sure to remember all of it.
She tilted her gaze up, at the glittering evening stars and found herself wondering if these were the same stars that Jack Kelly was seeing. If being across the country was like being on the west side of the cottage, a world away but still under the same night. She closed her eyes trying to recall the memory of Jack, ignoring the black and white photographic image that jumped to her mind, instead patiently bringing up the red bandana and hazelnut colored eyes.
A light creaking alerted her. She was no longer alone, but there was something familiar in the sound or in the scent now twisting into the air. Whatever gave her the knowledge made her confident, she'd seen countless birds from Jasper to Filly to Critter know someone without seeing them and at this moment she knew without seeing.
Jacob Henry Canterbury leaned comfortably next to her, not close enough to touch but close enough to feel his warmth, and waited.
"How did you…" Audrey began to whisper. She kept her eyes closed, unwilling to let go of the Jack that stood against the black of her eyelids.
"Because," Something about his tone startled her enough to make her open her eyes and turn to him. "I know you."
There was a shift in the air, in his movements, in everything as quite suddenly he was kissing her. One of his hands was against her jaw, his fingers pressing into her neck just underneath her curls. And maybe it was the vision that had just danced away, or maybe it was pure reflex but Audrey found herself kissing him. Lost to a boy she remembered.
It had been a year since she had kissed anyone, and Audrey had always enjoyed kissing. But there was something frantic and unfamiliar in these lips and she found herself pressed to explain or calm. Jack had never kissed her like this. She couldn't decide if it was her heart or his thundering, as she leaned willingly into his embrace.
But just as suddenly as it began, his lips pulled away. He couldn't or wouldn't completely step back, instead merely resting his forehead to hers. She had closed her eyes again, lost to the moment.
"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." Jacob sighed.
Audrey blinked at his voice. Realizing the fingers at her neck was smooth, and the eyes in front of her weren't hazelnut. Recognition bringing her senses back.
"You'll forgive me, the impropriety of the advance. But, well, I've something to ask you." Jacob smiled, releasing her just as she tried to step back.
It was her heart hammering now and she wasn't sure she could get enough air into her lungs. Audrey reached out to steady herself with the banister but mistook the distance and lost her balance. Before she could fall, Jacob's hands were at her waist. He held her steady and upright, in a way she was sure he had done a hundred times since they meet last summer.
"Audrey?" A creep of worry was in his voice now, as if he realized he had startled her.
"Jacob." She whispered back.
"We can find you a drink, we can even retire for the evening if you wish if you give me just a moment more," Jacob promised. He was pleading with her, the brimming impatience from the evening becoming clearer. Audrey slides her hands down her torso to catch Jacob's hands. She wrapped her fingers around his, as she stepped away once more.
"One more moment, to ask me something?" She repeated, feeling as if she was waking from a dream.
"I wasn't sure I'd ever get you alone, but I know you like to slip away. It's how we met, after all. So it was always just a matter of being patient." Jacob rattled nervously, tugging his hands out of her hold.
He stood within arm's reach, in his crisp tailored suit with the ivory flower on his lapel glittering in the lamplight. Jacob Henry Canterbury was perfect.
He was handsome and tall, jovial and clever, not to mention industrious and rich. But outside the traits that society heralded, Jacob was kind and loyal and warm. He had been with Audrey every step of the way through her last year in society, and he had never questioned her or berated her or abandoned her. Audrey had flirted with him, sought him out, clung to him like a lighthouse in a storm.
She knew she loved him, but she knew she didn't love him enough the question he was bursting to ask.
"Audrey," He started.
"Please don't," Audrey whispered. She reached out to him again, holding up her hand to him. Terrified of stopping him and terrified of letting him continue.
"Audrey," He repeated, firmly, unwilling to concede to her even if he always had before.
"Jacob, please." She stepped forward again.
"I've loved you since I first saw you." Jacob stubbornly replies.
Audrey is staring at his hands, hanging by his hips, with fingers curling into fists. Determination spurs her to step forward and kiss him again. Pockets had taught her that there was never a conversation that could be had while kissing.
He caught her around the waist and his words were lost to her for a full breath before he gently pushed her back.
"Audrey, what is it?"
Jacob Canterbury, it turned out wasn't like Ben Harper. This man didn't distract or hide. Or maybe he couldn't.
"You know." She sighed desperately to will him out of his resolve. But Audrey knew, the way she had always known, Jacob didn't retreat.
"You must know. Everyone knows!" Jacob threw his arms up in frustration. He spins his back on her then, his shoulders popping up to his ears and the tension rolling down his back. She stays back, even as her arms instinctively reach forward to soothe him.
"It's all anyone talks of, for heaven's sake. You must let me, I must ask you." He sputters out into the night air.
Audrey can hear the music playing and realizes how long they have both been gone. She wills her heart to calm.
"Everything will change, but if you must." She sighs.
Jacob spins back to her then, taking her in. Everything from her stocking clad toes to the embroidery that hugs her hips to the way her lip rogue has smudged. He commits her to memory, just in case, she is right and everything does change.
"Will you marry me?"
She smiles at him, but it isn't a smile of happiness. This is the smile he's most familiar with, the one that pins a bit of sorrow into her eyes.
"No." She swallows and he waits. "My heart belongs to another."
Jacob inhales, letting the answer wash over him.
"The one who writes your letters?" He whispers to her.
He knew. She knew he knew. They'd always known. She nods.
"You deserve," She begins but shakes her head. "You must have someone who gives you their whole heart."
He nods. He lets out the breath he's been holding all evening, and every tension in his body seems to disappear.
"You've always known, why… why did you ask me?" Audrey sighs.
"I had to be sure, it's not as if we speak of him." Jacob gave her a small smile, letting one of his hands rub the back of his neck.
"But why tonight?" Audrey pressed.
Jacob nodded thoughtfully looking up into the night sky.
"Nothing has to change." He concludes.
Audrey doesn't reply.
"If I was wrong, if you would marry me then I could take you with me." Jacob almost whined as he reached out his hand, palm up like she had moments before. She doesn't take them, just like he didn't.
"Take me with you," Audrey repeats his words, again. She runs through every word she's heard this evening, she replays moments from the last week. She has been caught unawares as if she had stopped paying any attention to Jacob Canterbury outside of his own interactions with her.
"I set off for Europe with mother and Emma day after next." He explains.
"You're leaving?" She can feel the panic now, rising up and clawing at her. She doesn't realize, even now, how Jacob sees it too.
"We'll likely be back before winter sets in again," He explains lightly. He has clasped her hand and is leading her back towards the inside of the cottage.
"Let's get your slippers back on then."
Jacob finds her slippers, crouching down to help her slip back into them as he lets her absorb the news. He doesn't release her hand.
"If we were engaged, there would still be gossip if I went to Europe with you." Audrey puzzles out slowly.
"There will be gossip any way we do anything, Miss Audrey." Jacob laughs sharply. Audrey tightens her grip on his hand.
"You said nothing would change." She pleads.
"You can't expect a man not to have his pride hurt a bit at being refused?" Jacob teases lightly, as he pulls her hand through his elbow to escort her around the porch.
"You can find a beautiful Italian to marry, some heiress or opera singer," Audrey replied trying to breathe at a normal pace by not dwelling on the fact that he was leaving her.
"They are unlikely to suit me, I think."
The outdoor ballroom was brilliantly lit and two orchestras played a waltz. Jacob pulled Audrey closer to him as he helped her down the steps onto the lawn.
"I am sorry," Audrey whispered suddenly.
"So am I." Jacob whispered back. "Let's get us some drinks and give you a twirl, it'll make us both feel better."
As they stepped closer to the music, Audrey noticed how the dancers glided over rose petals. Jacob expertly brought them in from the shadows, bringing as little attention to them as possible. Audrey has to work to keep the panic at bay as she steps back from her, allowing for the socially acceptable distance between them. She remembers society and gossip as the whispers start around her, low murmurs dancing with the music and festivities.
"Give me a jolly sendoff then? " Jacob murmurs to her, reaching out to snag two flutes of champagne. He holds out hers, his arm almost completely straight in front of him and she feels him oceans away already.
Audrey smiles brightly at him as she accepts the champagne.
"For you, only the jolliest." She blinks rapidly trying to keep the tears from falling.
"If you drink that champagne-like a good girl, I'll help you find some whisky." Jacob winked at her mischievously, leaning forward for just a moment to press his forehead against hers. Comforting and familiar and only a breath of touch to remind her, nothing has to change.
"You'll come back?" She whispered to him.
"I promise." Jacob nodded, tipping her flute up to her lips to encourage her to drink it before taking her hand to join the dancing reel.