Always

Chapter 19

A/n: Hmm don't worry, this isn't discontinued or anything. I just haven't been in the mood to write it. I also haven't had time to write. So well, here I am, in the mood and with a moment xD; so enjoy! Sorry if my writing's changed a bit. I usually try to match it a bit but… ah oh well.

I may also try to work at getting a few other updates in.

xXx

I blinked my eyes open slowly. The sound of voices in the next room had woken me and I groaned, rolling over and covering my head with the comforter to muffle the sound. It had been like this for the past two weeks and I didn't think that I'd ever get used to having people in our house again. At least not for a while anyway. Soft chuckling made my skin prickle and sent my heart into a frenzy. I pulled the blanket down, turning to see Axel grinning at me. He was already dressed, but his outfit gave me no clues towards any plans he might have for the day. It was as simple as yesterday- a deep purple beater and faded jeans. Lately he'd been making sure that my self-defense skills were up to par, but I never really knew what to expect. It was always a surprise. With my permission, of course.

His lips curved upward and he grasped the headboard with nimble fingers, moving forward with a cat-like grace, and sat cross-legged next to me. I looked him over, from that flaming red hair that was pulled back in a low ponytail to the Cheshire grin on his lips, down his lean but muscular body, all the way to his sock clad feet. My heart was thumping painfully fast in my chest. Then he bent down in one fluid motion, stopping to whisper in my ear.

"You're always so cute, right when you wake up." I swallowed, all of my senses on fire as he punctuated each word of the next sentence with a kiss, "I could just eat you up," he breathed huskily and I gasped when teeth tugged at my earlobe. My face was overheating when I turned to stare up into his eyes. Then he leant closer and caught my lips in a deep caress. I was arching into him by the time he broke away. Halfway grinning, he trailed his fingers along my neck, down my chest, finding a sensitive nipple and stroking it languidly to match each thundering heartbeat. I could feel the heat in my face travelling down and pooling down in my gut and gradually lower, sending jolts up and down my spine. His grin widened as he watched me become aroused. "Would you like that, Roxy?" he purred, cupping my growing erection. I groaned, my eyes falling shut.

"I-is the door locked?" I gasped. Axel chuckled, capturing my lips again.

"Of course," he murmured against them. He bit my lower lip, tugging me forward as he pulled the blankets away and then slid his tongue into my mouth, tangling it with mine. When I moaned, he deepened the kiss and I grasped his shoulders just to have something to hold onto. "Is that a yes?" he asked between kisses, making me laugh. Our eyes met and I smiled at him.

"I suppose it is," I answered, kissing him back. He pressed forward, sliding his hand up my abdomen and resting it on my neck. My breath caught when he straddled my hips. His brow arched and he asked,

"You suppose? How about a yes?" He was smiling wryly. I swallowed. I knew this game well by now and the thought of him playing with me until he forced me to say it was rather tempting. I shrugged.

"Idunno, I guess," I murmured back noncommittedly. With a sharp grin, he worked his way down my neck, biting and sucking where he knew I'd enjoy it the most and then back up to my ear.

"Hmm, well, I was going to take your clothes off," he murmured, trailing his hand down my body, "and kiss you so softly and tenderly that you'd be impatiently begging me for more, until I got here," he said, pausing to rub his thumb into a dip in my hip. He was teasing me right back and it was new and exciting, "where I was going to get more aggressive, licking and sucking," and then his fingers were moving, ghosting down and then up my thigh and I could almost feel his mouth there. I unsuccessfully tried not to tremble, "and licking and sucking… until…" he breathed against my lips, his fingers ghosting across my arousal. He kissed me gently and I moaned, "I blew…" he murmured, kissing me again and indulging in a few more, "your…" I moaned again, overwhelmed and thrusting into his hand. Axel grinned like a damned Cheshire cat. "Mind," he murmured, leaning closer until I could feel his lips brushing against mine, "buuut you 'dunno' so-" I didn't even let him finish. I pulled him in until I was kissing him hard.

"Oh I do know, and you know what else? You'd better do it just like that or you'll be taking a cold shower, I swear to God Ax-" Axel chuckled, silencing me with a kiss. He hummed softly.

"You don't threaten me very often," he said with a grin, his green eyes alight, "carful, I just might punish you." Before I could speak, he was devouring my mouth, kissing me until I was breathless and writhing under his touches. Then he did exactly what he'd described, step for step. Just as I was about to climax, he pulled his mouth away and I groaned miserably.

"Axel, please," I whimpered. With a grin, he ran his tongue along my shuddering arousal.

"Please what?" he whispered, his eyes locking with mine.

"Don't punish me," I pleaded. His eyes flickered with surprise for a moment. Then his lips quirked upward.

"Baby, I was just teasing about that," he said chuckling softly and shaking his head. He smiled down at me endearingly as he sat up. It was then that I noticed that he was blushing cutely, a little red line bridging over his nose, even. "I just… I wanted to…" his blush darkened and his smile became helpless, "I wanted to make love to you." I felt my eyes widen and my face reddened. "Is that okay?"

"Of course it is," I told him. His smile widened.

"Good, because I love you so much," me murmured, bending down and taking my mouth in a kiss that went on and on. It turned into several drawn out exploratory kisses, each becoming bolder than the last. Soon, my hands were grasping his ass under his jeans, kneading hard, as we got carried away and before I had fully registered what was happening, his jeans were around his thighs and he was grasping my erection and pushing down. I arched into him, my nails digging into his hips as I moaned helplessly into his mouth. He continued to kiss me for another breathless moment before I shifted inside him and brushed his prostate, leaving him gasping. He trembled against me for only a moment before moving slowly with me, relishing in feeling of it. We were each moaning and panting, gasping for air and when I came, it tipped him over the edge, forcing him to climax as well.

When my senses came back to me, he was resting on my chest and I was stroking his hair. It felt so good that I wanted to stay that way forever. Axel looked up at me and smiled, his face still flushed. It made me swallow hard. He was so gorgeous. "Did you know…" he mused, trailing his fingers along my stomach as he spoke, "that it's snowing?" I blinked. That was something that hardly ever happened in Hallow Bastion.

"Really?" His smile just widened.

"That means it's almost your birthday, huh? You'll be twenty-one, so you can drink with me legally," he teased. We fell into a short silence and then he spoke again. "Tomorrow's New Year's eve already." I blinked again.

"Really?" That also meant that the team would be back out to begin work on the Keyblades again in just a few days. Axel just laughed.

"Yeah, really." I blushed, making him smile. "You've been pretty good," he murmured, making me scoff. He smiled wryly. "Wanna go out for New Year's?" I smiled back at him despite myself.

"Only if I get to kiss you at midnight." Axel smiled brightly at that.

"Deal."

xXx

True to his word, we went out that night, with minimal security in the background, because it was a double-date with Demyx and Zexion. Xaldin and Tifa had been lingering somewhere behind us. We'd had dinner together and then had gone through one of Hallow Bastion's many parks. This one was in the new territory that Axel had obtained from Larxene. It was in the North-most fringe and was much colder than where we lived. There was snow everywhere and it was deep. I was grateful for the warmth that our coats provided because I wasn't used to being so cold. He clasped my gloved hand in his own and glanced back at me with a smile. I had been lagging behind because I was keeping an eye out for Demyx and Zexion. They had gone off in another direction for the time being. It was nice to finally be alone with Axel again.

"Are you daydreaming?" he asked. I laughed.

"What if I am?" Axel snorted.

"Does that mean I'm a bad date?" I shook my head.

"No, I was just wondering what Demyx and Zexion were doing," I admitted. Axel chuckled.

"I found them a while ago, actually." I tilted my head at him, but overall wasn't terribly surprised. Axel was extremely attentive to his surroundings. Especially if it was an area that he wasn't used to being in.

"Oh?" I asked, smiling a bit when he took me off the path. We peeked past the evergreens and into a clearing where Demyx and Tifa were having a snowball fight. Zexion was watching mildly, looking bored. That is until he got a snowball in his face. Slowly, he wiped off his face and brushed the snow out of his hair, and then off of his coat, scowling at a mischievous looking Demyx, who was using his sister as a shield. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped and all three turned to us. Zexion looked at Demyx who waggled his eyebrows and nudged Tifa playfully. Zexion smirked wrly.

"Uh-oh," Axel murmured. I looked up at him. He was assessing the situation.

"…What?" I asked. He grabbed my arm, tugging me into his chest, just in time for a snowball to miss me and hit the tree instead. I stared at the trio, wide-eyed. "Hey!" Demyx was laughing and getting ready to throw his next snowball.

"Better run!" I heard Axel say, and I gasped as he tugged me along, stumbling and sliding. Tifa whooped and Demyx gave a battle cry in the distance. We zigzagged from side to side to avoid getting hit. Axel laughed, glancing back quickly and guiding me towards some playground equipment and we hid behind a slide to catch our breaths.

"Do you think we're safe now?" I whispered. There was a thud, thud against the slide and Axel laughed breathlessly.

"Looks like we've got no choice but to fight back," he whispered back seriously, rolling up a snowball and making me laugh. I attempted to mimic him but it fell apart in my hand. He smiled a bit. "You've gotta pack the snow, Rox," he murmured, showing me how. When I had it down, Demyx appeared and hit Axel in the chest with a snowball, compromising our position. As Axel and I threw our snowballs at him, Tifa appeared beside Demyx and Zexion, behind us. The snowball fight ended up being a lot of fun, more fun than we'd had in a long time, probably since Sora and Riku's wedding. When it was over, Axel showed me how to make a snowman.

More people had shown up and I smiled up at Axel. Snow was beginning to fall again and it was landing in his fiery hair, melting on his rosy cheeks. Soon it would be time to head back home to watch the fireworks or... Maybe we could stay in and I could convince him to just spend the night at home with me. That sounded really nice, actually. Axel caught me watching him and smiled.

"What's up, Rox?" I ducked my head

"Well I was just…" I began, but the words caught in my throat when Demyx ran up to us with a gleeful expression on his face.

"Roxas! You have to make a snow angel with me! You're the only one who hasn't made one yet!" He was absolutely beaming. I laughed uncertainly.

"A snow angel?" I asked. Demyx nodded enthusiastically.

"Yep! I'll show you, c'mon!" I glanced at Axel warily but blinked when I saw that Axel was coming with us, smiling a bit instead.

"Okay."

Together, Axel and Demyx showed me how to make snow angels. I actually had a lot of fun, once I stopped feeling so awkward. While our friends had fun in the snow, I stared down at our celestial creations. Somehow, they reminded me of my mother. Axel came up beside me and wrapped a lanky arm around me. It felt nice. He was always so warm, even now. I leaned into him, realizing that it had gotten colder.

"Are you alright?" he asked. I nodded my head. "Are you sure?" I shrugged.

"I guess I was just thinking about my mom," I admitted.

"Is that a bad thing?" he asked. I shook my head.

"I don't think so," I told him. "I just feel like, maybe I did this, what we did today, building snowmen and making snow angels, with her." Axel nodded.

"It's a good possibility," he answered, hugging me reassuringly. "Did you remember anything?" I shook my head again.

"No." We watched our friends for a moment. Demyx, and Tifia were enjoying themselves and Xaldin had joined in. Zexion just looked cold. I felt strange, like I was being watched, and looked up to see bright green eyes looking into mine.

"What was it that you were going to ask me… before?" he asked. I felt my cheeks heat up.

"Well, I wanted to ask if we could go home," I told him. Axel looked surprised.

"Aren't you having fun?" he asked.

"Well, I am but," I murmured shyly, taking his hand and playing with his fingers. "I thought that it would be nice to spend some time at home with you." Axel smiled warmly, giving my hand a squeeze. He tilted his head towards our friends and I nodded, feeling a bit crestfallen that we wouldn't be going home alone, but didn't complain.

Axel stopped to speak with Zexion, who nodded to him, "Are we leaving for the fireworks, now, Axel?" He asked, looking slightly hopeful. The red-head shook his head.

"Sorry, no. Roxas would like to go home," he replied. Zexion glanced at his husband worriedly and I felt guilty, knowing that Demyx would be very upset if he couldn't watch the fireworks. "Would you mind riding with Tifa and the others? Roxas and I would like to spend some time together. I'm sure that she won't mind," he said with a wry smile, "besides, I think that Dem would be pretty upset if he missed watching the ball drop." Zexion gave him a smile.

"Of course, I'll let them know," he replied. Axel nodded his head.

"Thanks Zexion," he said with a grin. It softened when he met my gaze.

"Ready Rox?" I smiled up at him.

"Yeah."

We walked to Axel's car in silence, the snow crunching beneath our feet. When we got there, he opened the door for me and then got in as well. Once we were inside, he turned on the ignition, letting it warm up.

"You looked like you were having fun out there," he mused.

"That's because I did have fun," I admitted. He glanced at me, his smile widening. "Did you?"

Axel shrugged. "It made me feel like I was twelve again, playing in the snow like I used to with Reno." I frowned a bit.

"I thought that this was part of the city that your family had been wanting, wouldn't it be dangerous to live here if you didn't control the area?" I asked, feeling confused. Axel's smile twisted into something bitter.

"You're right. My grandfather lost control of this part of the city when I was fifteen. He was hoping to get it back by marrying me to Larxene. She knew that it was sentimental to me, so she gave it back."

"Why's that?" I asked curiously. Axel frowned thoughtfully.

"My father's buried over here and so is my brother. Mom made sure that they were together. I grew up over here, too. When my grandfather died, I moved to the house we live in now," he explained.

"Why did you move? Because it was dangerous to live here?" I asked, feeling curious. He shrugged.

"I know how to take care of myself, so I wasn't worried about that. When I moved, I wanted to make new memories. Better memories," he replied, "and I have, especially with you." I felt my face warm and he smiled at me. His cheeks were still rosy and his green eyes glimmered in the dark. It was a moment that felt absolutely perfect, but I felt speechless. I wanted to kiss him more than anything.

The moment passed and Axel put the car into gear. The drive was silent and I was mad at myself the whole way because I hadn't said anything back. Like: how amazing he was, or how grateful I was that the last five years, almost, I'd gotten to spend with him and that they had been the best years of my life. Even though I'd almost ruined things between us by getting hit by a car. Or you know, all the times I'd disappeared. Ungh I was such a screw-up wasn't I? I let my head fall back against the headrest and groaned. Axel glanced at me.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" When I didn't answer, he took my hand and squeezed reassuringly. "Roxas?" I looked at him reluctantly and then at the road. I recognized the houses, we were getting close to home. I shrugged.

"Axel, I feel like I keep messing things up… and I don't want to talk about it now because I feel like it will ruin tonight." The red-head pursed his lips but didn't say anything for a long moment. Instead, he was focusing on opening the garage and parking the car. When we were safely parked, he turned to me, thinking about what he wanted to say.

"I want you to know that you don't ever have to feel that way, Rox," he told me, searching my eyes and seeming concerned. "You can always tell me what's on your mind. Always." I opened my mouth but nothing came out. "What did you mess up? You can talk to me, I'll listen," he promised. I stared down at his hand that was clasped in mine.

"It's just that… back there felt so perfect and I messed up, I couldn't even tell you like I wanted to… or ask or…" I mumbled, closing my eyes and sighing.

"Roxas?" I looked up at him, searching his eyes.

"What you said, it was so wonderful and true and I feel that way too…" I told him, trailing off when he smiled warmly, "…and I… Can I kiss you?" Axel laughed breathlessly.

"Finally, I thought you were going to make me wait til midnight," he told me, amusement in his voice. I scoffed at him and he laughed harder, apologizing once he calmed down.

With a small smile, I cupped his face in my hand, threading red hair through my fingers and tugging him down, into a kiss. We forgot to stop, only breaking apart when Axel mumbled something about continuing in the bedroom, which sounded like an excellent idea to both of us, and so with the promise of more, we went.

And of course, I remembered to kiss him at midnight, too.

xXx