Disclaimer: I own nothing affiliated with THAT 70S SHOW.

"I bet you want me to carry you over the threshold, right?" Hyde asked Jackie, as he unlocked their hotel room. She giggled, and shook her head.

"You don't want to carry me," she said, and pointed at her stomach. "I'm a whale, remember?"

"If you're fishing for compliments you won't get anything," he said.

"Aww, why not?" she asked.

"It feeds your vanity," he said.

"Whatever, that's cool," she said, and he opened the door to the hotel room. She peeked her head in. "Okay, this is better than that damn car."

"The Gremlin wasn't that bad," Hyde said. She put her bags at the foot of the bed, and pulled back the curtains. There was a lovely view of Monterey Bay. She sighed, happily, and turned around.

"It's gorgeous here," she said. He closed the door behind him, and walked to her. He began kissing her neck, and she moaned happily. "You're frisky today."

"I've been frisky since our flight," Hyde said, and she tapped his nose with her finger. "Come on, before we hit the beach let's hit the sheets."

"That was tacky at best," she said. "Okay, we had a bump in the road with the car, but now we've gotten to a point where nothing can go wrong for our honeymoon."

"Be careful, you're gonna jinx us," Hyde said, wrapping his arms around her back. He led her to the bed, and she smiled at him as she sat down. She then screamed, and leapt up on the bed. "JESUS, what's wrong!"

"That!" she exclaimed, pointing at the wall. "There's a spider on the wall!" Hyde rolled his eyes.

"Are you kidding? Jackie, you shouldn't freak out about a spider," he said, turning to where she was pointing. "JESUS! That's a fucking huge spider!"

"I know! I knooooow!" she exclaimed, sitting in the corner across the room. "Kill it!"

"I… Okay, I'm going to be honest here," Hyde said, standing behind the bed. "I'm afraid that if I attempt to kill it, it will sense my hostility, and attack."

"Well we can't share this room with it! Kill it!" she exclaimed.

"Why should I be the one to kill it!"

"You're the man!"

"Are you serious? Have you reverted back to your high school attitudes?" he asked.

"My hate for spiders has not changed, so how could it have reverted?" she demanded.

"Can't it wait?"

"Steven, it could scamper off to it's spider lair and then, when we're sleeping, it could lay eggs in my face, and my face will swell up, and I'll think I have a pimple, but it will actually be SPIDER EGGS IN MY FACE. And then they'll hatch and it will break open, and all the baby spiders will burst out!" she exclaimed.

"…That's sick."

"Barry told me that story once in college."

"Hand me your Cosmo."

"But… but it's Cosmo!"

"Cosmo is being sent into battle," Hyde said, grabbing it from her carry-on.

"But… it's Cosmo!" she said again, grabbing it from him.

"How else are we going to get rid of the spider?"

"But… it's-!"

"I know it's Cosmo!" he exclaimed. "Woman, hand me the Cosmo!" She sighed, and tossed him the magazine. He rolled it up, and smacked the spider with it. She shrieked a little bit, and Hyde looked at the magazine.

"Is it dead?" she asked. He examined it, and nodded. "Oh good. For a second there I thought we were living in a bad horror movie." He smirked, and offered her the magazine. "No, we can just throw that out."

"Oh, you finished all the articles you wanted?"

"… No."

"…. Sorry."

"It's fine, you can buy me a new one," she said, and he dropped it in the waste basket. "So, where were we?" He arched his eyebrows slyly, and ran a hand through her hair.

"Right about here, I think," he said, kissing her gently. She smiled, and threw her arms around his neck. "So, shall we officially start the honeymoon?"

"What does that involve?" she asked.

"Well, we fool around for awhile, go to dinner, fool around some more, go to the beach, fool around some more, and then sleep," he said. "Then we start it up again in the morning." She smiled, and nodded.

"I like that plan," she said. They began kissing again, and she sat on his lap. "I love you."

"Back at you."

"My brave spider killer."

"Glad to be of service."

"I knew I married you for a reason."

"For my extermination services?"

"You got it."

"Wanna begin the honeymoon now?"

"Nah, I can wait."

"You're a tease."

"I've been this way forever, you knew that before you married me." He kissed her again, and she finally lost herself in it. After the junk bucket car, the lost map, and the queen of the spiders, this honeymoon could only go up from there.

----------------------------------------

"I have brought food!" Eric called, opening the door. Barry and Donna put down the playing cards, and both charged him for the groceries. "Hey! Careful, there's breakable food stuffs in there!"

"What should we have for dinner?" Donna asked Barry, as the rooted through the bags. "Mmm, spaghetti and meatballs sounds nice."

"That does sound good," Barry said.

"Remember I'm the one cooking, so I'd appreciate nothing too elaborate," Eric said.

"How elaborate is that?" Donna asked, and handed him the pasta and meat.

"You can always help me," Eric said, and Barry and Donna chuckled. "You guys suck."

"I have an excuse, I'm pregnant and… I'm tired," Donna said.

"Well what's your excuse, Barry?" Eric asked. Barry looked over at Donna, and then back at Eric.

"I'm bad at cooking," he answered.

"That doesn't cut it," Eric said.

"Then…. You're forcing me to stay in the Pink Kingdom," Barry said. "And that makes me tired too." Eric shot him a look, and he rolled his eyes.

"Fine," he continued. "I'll help with dinner."

"My hot tub buddy!" Donna exclaimed.

"You shouldn't be in a hot tub anyway, you're pregnant!" Eric said. "Too hot water is bad!"

"Fine fine fine," Donna said. "I'll take care of the pasta. You cave too fast, Barry."

Barry and Eric made meatballs as Donna boiled water.

"At least we aren't eating squirrel," Barry said, and Eric chuckled.

Donna went to grab a sweater from the bedroom. She rummaged through her suitcase, and found a picture of Tommy. She smiled sadly, and threw the sweater over her head.

"Eric, do you think it would bother your mom if I called and checked in on Tommy?" she asked as she walked into the main room.

"Nah, she knows what it's like to be a mother," Eric said. "Go for it." Donna smiled, and grabbed the phone from the table. She dialed, and sat next to the porch door as she waited for an answer.

"Hello?"

"Hi Kitty, it's Donna."

"Hello, Donna! How is the cabin?"

"It's fine, the men are making dinner and I'm relaxing."

"That sounds nice."

"So Kitty, I was calling about Tommy. How is he adjusting?" Donna asked. "This is the first time he's been away from me in a long time, and I wanted to make sure that he isn't anxious or crying for me."

"Oh no, he's just fine," Kitty said.

"Really?" Donna asked. "Oh! Well, good! I'm glad he isn't upset, I was really worried about that."

"Yes, he's fine, he and Red are playing catch in the living room," Kitty said.

"Well, has he asked about me at all?" Donna asked, a little hopeful.

"Um… No, not to my recollection," Kitty said.

"Oh… Well, good!" Donna said. "Just remember that he likes 'Goodnight Moon', and you have to kiss his teddy bear goodnight too, or he gets upset."

"I remember, Donna, don't worry," Kitty said. "He's fine without you being here." Donna was silent for a little bit. Kitty realized her mistake, and tried her best to back paddle.

"I mean, I'm sure he misses you, but he's handling it very well," she continued, and Donna sighed. "Do you want to talk to him?"

"Oh! Yes, yes I would!" Donna said.

"One minute, dear," Kitty said. Donna waited, and waited, and tapped her feet and hummed a little bit. It had only been a couple minutes but she really wanted to hear Tommy's voice. It felt like hours.

"Um," she heard Kitty say.

"Is he there?" Donna asked.

"… He would rather play ball," Kitty said.

"…Oh my God."

"Now don't worry, he's just having a great time playing with his grandpa, a ha ha ha!" Kitty said, laughing in a reassuring way. "I'll call the cabin in an hour when it's almost bedtime for him, and you can say goodnight!"

"Okay," Donna said, leaning against the glass door of the porch. "Okay, yeah, that sounds good."

As she said this, though, tears began to well in her eyes. She didn't have time to start crying, for a large THUD hit the porch door, and a snarling dog began barking through the glass.

"JESUS!" Donna exclaimed, leaping from the door.

"Donna?" Kitty exclaimed. "Donna, are you okay? What's wrong!"

"Nothing, Kitty, a goddamn dog just scared the heck out of me," Donna said, quickly wiping the tears from her eyes. "I have to go! Remember to call!" She hung up, and looked at the barking lab.

"Eric!" she yelled, and Eric and Barry came running into the room, and saw the animal as it fogged up the glass.

"What is that thing!" Eric asked.

"I think it's that damn dog from down the road!" Donna exclaimed. "Or it's a dog from hell!"

"It's eyes are red!" Barry exclaimed.

"They aren't red, Barry, it's a trick of the light," Eric said. "I think…"

"Where's it's owner?" Barry asked.

"Good question!" Donna exclaimed. She walked to the curtains, and shut them so they didn't have to look at the ugly beast anymore. They could still hear it though.

"Has it trapped us in the cabin, like 'Cujo'?" Eric asked.

"That was a car," Barry said.

"I don't care if it was a train, has it trapped us?" Eric exclaimed.

"It's owners will want to find it sooner or later," Donna said. "Just… walk away from it and hopefully it will lose interest." They walked into the kitchen, and Donna wiped more tears from her face.

"Jeeze, that thing really scared you, didn't it?" Barry asked, rubbing her back. She nodded, and didn't want to tell him that her fear was not just of the big angry dog outside.