A/N… Hope everyone had a good weekend – Thanksgiving or not. See me at the bottom for a few things.

~oOo~

Chapter 5

BELLA

"Terms!" Emmett bellowed once Edward and I set foot inside the main house through the back door and into the game room. "Two on two, eight ball, one game, and winner calls the songs for tomorrow's open mic night."

"Okay, first… Where?" I asked him.

"We have our choice of two places – Billings, which is a four-hour drive, or Great Falls, which is a smaller town and only an hour away," he answered, shrugging a shoulder. "I vote Billings. We can kinda get lost in the shuffle there."

I glanced to Edward, who was narrowing his eyes at our brother. "And Billings because it's a rock bar."

Laughing, I looked back to Emmett. "What's Great Falls, big brother?"

Emmett grinned, shaking his head. "Country."

"Ah, okay. So for future reference for Jasper. Got it," I teased Emmett but gave Jasper a fist bump.

"Thanks, kiddo," Jasper said with a laugh.

I gazed around at the faces in the room. They really wanted this. Alice was practically bouncing on her toes. Rose was eyeing the pool table like it owed her money, and that thought made Edward chuckle against my temple. Adrian didn't look like he cared where or what we sang, just that we were going, but Kevin was pacing the floor. Archie was watching us all raptly with Caroline curled up next to him.

For a moment, I wondered why my vote was important if we were all on the same page with the rock bar.

"Because if you don't pick the songs, Emmett will," Edward answered verbally. "And he's leaning on letting you be the lead singer for every song."

"Motherfucker… You just gotta spill it all," Emmett growled, rolling his eyes to me. "C'mon, baby sis, some of the best bands have a badass chick up front."

"Oh, hell no. I'm not singing every song. Are you crazy?" I snapped at him. "So I'm playing pool in order to hear something other than my own damn voice?"

"Pretty much, yeah," Edward answered with a laugh. "Not that I'd complain, but he knows how you feel about it."

"Dammit, Ed!"

Edward merely grinned his way. "It's this or she refuses it all, so I'd rather tell her."

I laughed a little at that because Edward knew me all too well.

"Oh, yeah. No, can't have that," Kevin added. "But Goddess, you should sing at least one. They're giving us three."

"I'm playing to pick the other two?" I asked, shaking my head at this turn of events. "Why are we even bothering with pool? You pick mine, and I'll pick the other two."

"Dangerous, sweet girl," Edward warned me. "He can't quite decide on your song, but it's heavy."

Emmett grinned, flipping Edward off. "He's right, but you could totally nail Evanescence, Nightwish, Heart, or Halestorm."

My eyebrows shot up. "You guys have way too high of aspirations for my singing."

Edward laughed, his head falling back. "No, love. You can sing all of them without even blinking."

So biased, Edward Cullen, I thought to him with narrowed eyes.

He merely smiled. "Maybe. But you can do it."

"Ugh, you guys are killing me! Fine, one game. Em, who's your partner?" I asked him.

"Edward."

"Seriously?" I growled, pointing at my brother. "You and I are gonna have problems."

"I figure if anyone agrees with me that you should sing every song, it's Eddie, here." Emmett folded his massive arms across his chest as he smiled in victory.

"Jesus," I hissed, rolling my eyes to Edward, who was way more passive about not being my partner than he normally would be. "Well, Em, you're probably right about that."

Edward grinned down at his feet but turned to grab his pool cue.

I glanced over at Alice, shielding her for a moment to see what her visions said about who my partner should be. She smirked and nodded when I picked someone.

"Fine, I'll take Caroline."

"No!" my youngest sister squealed. "I'll make you lose!"

"Bullshit," I said, waving her over. "First, you need the practice. Second, you need to help me make these two eat their words."

Caroline shook her head but took the pool stick Edward was handing her. She looked back to me.

Jasper stepped forward with a quarter in his hand. "Bells, heads or tails?"

"Tails."

He flipped the coin, letting it hit the table instead of catching it. When it came to a rolling stop, it was tails.

"Sweet," Caroline said, pointing to me. "You break. Maybe this will all be over before I can screw it up."

Edward laughed, shaking his head, but he leaned back against the wall as Emmett racked up the balls and centered them.

The room was silent as I pulled back my cue to break. Apparently, this open mic night was a long time coming, and everyone wanted something out of it. There was a loud crack when the white ball collided with the group in the middle. Solids and stripes went in multiple directions, but the three and seven fell into the far corner pocket.

"Solids," I murmured to myself, studying the table.

I wasn't sure I could do this in one turn, and I was right, but I removed the two and five balls before I missed my shot at the four.

Edward was next, having a good run. By the time he missed a shot, he'd taken out the nine, ten, twelve, and fifteen. Caroline's panicked gaze met mine, and I laughed, shaking my head.

"He left you in a decent spot," I told her, pointing to where the six was by the side pocket and the one was by the corner on the same side. "Use your angles. Don't get fancy; that's when mistakes happen. Fancy is later. Simple is now."

Tricks and fancy shots had their place, but it was the simplest ways that won games. I'd heard those very words from Seth one time on the reservation. I'd been angry when Seth and I had played that specific game of pool, but his sweet, easy personality along with the never-ending jibes and jokes between Quil and Embry helped me calm down. It had been a particularly bad Jacob day, because it had been the twentieth of June – Edward's birthday – and the summer after I'd graduated from Forks High. And I was just fucking pissed off. I'd been angry at Jacob and Edward and the whole damn world.

"Simple shots," I whispered to Caroline, guiding her to the side of the table. "Use the marks on the sides of the table to help you aim."

"Oh, God, if I lose this and you have to sing all night…" she started, trailing off when I laughed.

"Then you'll have made their damn day. I'll live. I promise," I assured her with a chuckle, gesturing to Edward and Emmett.

Poor thing, she was a nervous wreck setting up to take her shot, and the whole room held their breaths. It was all snark and insults until it came to rallying around a member of the family for something as small as a game of pool. She took her shot from the side, and she not only sank the six, but she also put away the one as well.

However, that left us with the four in an awkward position, and we had to take that out before we could aim for the eight ball.

"You won't sink it," Jasper said, stepping forward. "Don't even try it. You'll scratch. Your best strategy is to put the ball so that Emmett has a difficult shot."

"Hey!" Emmett scoffed.

"Shh!" we all hushed him.

"Let Caroline play!" Alice scoffed. "Damn, you'd think after this many damn years, you'd be used to losing."

Rose cracked up, smacking Emmett's shoulder lightly. "You'll get your chance to prove us all wrong, but for now, let her play."

Emmett grinned, raising his hands in surrender, but he took it all in stride. Caroline lined up a shot, tapping the ball lightly enough that it wedged itself between our four and their eleven.

"Finally!" Emmett boomed, dramatically rolling his head on his shoulders and pretending to crack his knuckles.

Rolling my eyes, I took a seat on one of the tall stools on the wall. Edward leaned into me, kissing my temple.

"You okay?" he asked in a barely there whisper.

I nodded, leaning into him as well. You saw that memory, huh?

"Mmhm," he hummed into my hair but inhaled deeply.

My eyes were on Emmett taking out the fourteen ball, but my thoughts were to Edward. I'm okay, baby. It's been almost twenty years since that happened. And despite why I was playing pool with Seth and the boys, those memories are good ones.

I gazed up at Edward, who nodded a little. However, I could read his face like a book, and he'd never ask the question that was rattling around in his head in front of all our siblings.

Let's talk about it with Carlisle. We promised him a chat anyway. Hmm?

"Okay," he agreed with another soft kiss.

Our attention was brought back to the pool table when Emmett's curses turned rather colorful and inventive. He'd taken out the fourteen and eleven. We were tied on the table, and Emmett's shot for the thirteen ball didn't make it.

"Yes!" Caroline squealed, hopping up and down and pointing at Emmett. "Oh, ho! It's over now."

I laughed softly, slipping down from my stool and picking up my pool stick.

"Shit, motherfuck…" Emmett grumbled, glancing up when Carlisle and Esme entered the room.

"Emmett, don't even add another curse word to that list," Esme warned him.

"I don't know why you even bother to say anything anymore," I muttered, rolling my eyes before studying the pool table.

The room was quiet except for Carlisle whispering, "What's the bet on the table?"

Grinning his way, I said, "For my choice in songs and to opt out of singing all three songs." I narrowed my eyes at my opponents, both of whom merely smiled innocently.

"Oh, dear," Esme said with a light laugh.

"High stakes."

"Mmhm," I hummed, eyeing the table again, and the room went quiet.

I had two balls left – the four and the eight. I lined up an angle shot on the four in the corner pocket which gave it a nudge right in. However, the eight was now in the middle of the table with their thirteen close to it.

"Eight ball. Side pocket," I called, aiming my shot.

It was a sweet shot, and the black eight ball plunked into the pocket. Caroline squealed, jumping into my arms, which made me laugh.

"I didn't screw it up!"

Laughing, I shook my head but glanced to my other side when an arm draped over my shoulder. Jasper was smirking toward his brothers.

"Well, Bells, before we let those two pick what you're singing, what'll it be for your two song choices?" he asked, grinning at Edward's and Emmett's scoffs.

I studied the whole group, tilting my head at them all. This would be the first open mic night in over two years. It should be fun, maybe heavy since it was a rock club, and a bit stimulating. I shielded my thoughts from Edward and my decisions from Alice.

"I propose…a challenge," I stated, glancing over at Jasper and then Edward. "Find two songs that let a bit of truth out. I don't care if it's dedicated to one of us or something about you. Find something about feelings," I suggested to Jasper. I then pointed to Edward. "Or waiting a long time for love, or how laughter is the best medicine," I added, gesturing to Emmett, and then finally faced Kevin. "Maybe a song about finding love during hard times. Boys, I don't care. Be creative, but let the truth sneak out. And if you want to keep it secret from the rest of us until you figure it out, then by all means."

"Wait, love… You mean you're giving us a theme?" Edward asked, glancing between his brothers before gazing back to me. "You're not picking specific songs?"

"Exactly. If you know a song that speaks about voices in your head or psychic girls or something about a girl with a shield or wall up, then go for it. Make it fun. It's rock and roll. Hell, since it's rock and metal, feel free to sing about creatures of the night." That last suggestion made everyone laugh.

Edward's grin was positively gorgeous. "Okay, got it."

Emmett chuckled, rubbing his hands together. "That's an awesome idea! And since I get to pick yours, then we'll stick with your theme idea."

"Fair enough." I walked to Carlisle, linking my arm through his. "Do you have time to chat?" I asked him.

"For you? I'll make time," Carlisle whispered back. "Your house?"

I glanced over at Edward, and he nodded.

"Okay, lead the way, Bella," Carlisle said, gesturing for the back door.

~oOo~

EDWARD

Is she okay, son? Esme thought my way as Carlisle and Bella left the house.

"Yes, ma'am. She's fine. I think it's Carlisle who wants to talk more than she does," I replied with a soft chuckle. I turned to my brothers. "Come over in a few hours. We'll talk songs and get ready for Billings."

I left out the back door, running to catch up to my Bella. By the time I made it to the house, they were already sitting in the living room. This was probably overdue, this conversation with Carlisle. We hadn't really sat down with him since Renee had died. He needed it just as much as Bella and I probably did. These started a long time ago when I first returned to Bella and not long after her change and our wedding. Carlisle helped us overcome my leaving and Bella's abuse at Jacob's hands when I'd left her.

Joining Bella on the sofa, I dropped a kiss to her temple. "Well-played game, sweet girl."

"Thanks," she said through a huffing laugh.

"Indeed," Carlisle agreed, looking between us. "Okay, you two. Catch me up. How are things?"

"Before we start," Bella said, turning to me. "What's your question about that memory you just saw back there?"

I picked up her hand and linked her fingers with mine but glanced at Carlisle when he mentally asked what memory she was reliving. "Bella was guiding Caroline during our pool game, and she remembered a similar game on the Quileute reservation." I turned to Bella. "You were mad at me."

"Edward, I was mad at everyone," she said simply.

"Yes, I saw that, but you remembered it was my birthday and that it was a bad day with Jacob. I just… I wanted to know what happened."

She nodded, spinning my wedding band over and over. She was quiet for a moment, but her shield was lifted, so I could see her sorting through that particular day. Her human memories were a little blurry but intact.

"I'd just graduated from Forks High a few days prior. I knew the day was coming, and despite how I should've stayed home or gone to see Angela, I was itching to feel something. I totally went in search of a fight with Jake. There's no excuse, but I did. It's probably why I never wanted anyone to kill him for the things he'd done to me, because occasionally I'd light that fire simply to feel something other than emptiness and pain."

Carlisle sat forward, his elbows on his knees. "We've discussed everyone's regrets during that time. Was this memory a trigger?"

"No," she answered immediately. "Playing pool will probably always bring up the boys in La Push. They taught me how to play. They would take me, surround me with silliness and fun and a bit of protection, too. Seth is happiness incarnate, and that's really hard to ignore."

Grinning, I brought her hand up to kiss her fingers. "That's very true."

Bella glanced between us. "Those memories are good ones." She played with my ring a few seconds and then looked to me. "The memory you saw was just…"

"Grief," Carlisle finished for her. "And that's okay. It was loss and trying to come to terms with the closing of the high school time of your life."

"Maybe. There was a time then where I felt like all my choices had been just yanked away," she muttered, shrugging a shoulder and glancing my way. "More than just you. I mean, Charlie wanted me to go away to college, specifically to Renee in Florida. Jake kept telling me that our relationship would work when I knew deep down it wouldn't. For a bit there, I resented all of you. Like holy shit, don't I get a say about what I want?"

Carlisle's grin flashed briefly. "I'm sure that was frustrating."

"It was, but I did what I wanted when it came to college. I took a year and worked, only enrolling in a few classes. It was my time in Port Angeles. It was the only control I had." She took a deep breath and let it out. "Now, there's a bit of freedom knowing I don't have to be in control. I could have all the say I want in my life, but it's nice to not have to fight for it."

There was always guilt that flooded me whenever we discussed the two years we were apart. But I knew better than to apologize anymore. She wouldn't have it. Where she tried to live her life the best way she could, I'd wallowed in misery for some time. However, her last statement showed just how far we'd come emotionally and mentally since Forks.

I leaned over and simply whispered, "I love you."

Bella's smile was heartbreakingly sweet and warm. "Love you, too, Edward."

Carlisle smiled our way, but he had specific questions he wanted to ask. "Speaking of grief, Bella… How are you doing with the loss of your mother?"

"I'm okay." She wrinkled her nose adorably but went on. "Some days are fine. Some days I miss her terribly."

"Have you talked to Charlie lately?" he asked her.

"Yeah, just before we left Missoula. He's good, and he likes to brag about his doctor check-ups."

I laughed. "That's true. I'm pretty sure he's trying his best to stay around as long as he can. He's always talking about his diet and his exercise, which really consists of long walks and hanging out with Izzy and Eddie."

Jacob's two children were named after Bella and me. He and his wife and imprint, Anna, had named us godparents when each were born. Time had really flown, because Izzy was now sixteen and Eddie just turned thirteen. Both knew what mythical creatures surrounded them every day, and they loved us all – vampires and werewolves. Izzy was a beautiful girl who was about to start her junior year in high school. Eddie was in middle school and Jacob made over, except he lived for Bella's care packages. Eddie was an avid reader – fantasy, sci-fi, supernatural fiction. He'd read anything she sent him. Izzy lived for clothes and makeup, and Alice was only too happy to oblige.

Carlisle looked to me. "And you, son? This was a real fear of yours when Bella decided to become one of us. How are you handling it?"

"I was terrified at first," I answered honestly. "I despise denying Bella anything, so her inability to keep her mother plagued me, but I knew eventually time would take away someone in her life. This… I just… My fear of Bella having regrets in this life is still a very big fear.

"And before either of you say anything," I went on nervously, "I see there aren't any regrets. I know. I'm aware that Bella was truly fated for this life. But I watched Esme, Rosalie, and Alice struggle for decades upon decades with their loss of choices, never mind the mistakes that were made with their diets, which caused guilt and self-hatred, whether they voiced them or not. Even the Denali women struggled with this long life. I just never wanted Bella to see the dark parts. My need to cushion those things is real and true and as big as this house."

"You may not be able to cushion some things forever, Edward," Carlisle pointed out.

"Oh, I know," I agreed, raking a hand through my hair. "I'm aware, but it doesn't stop me from feeling that way."

Bella was quiet for a few seconds, but she turned to me. "Our fears are so different for two people who were meant to be."

Chuckling a little, I shrugged.

"What are your fears, Bells?" Carlisle asked her, going with whatever direction she wanted to take this conversation.

"The loss of him." Her brow furrowed as she glanced at me. "Not that I think he'll leave. And it's not the connection or the fear of my own death should something happen to him, but just… He needs to always be." She smiled a little, shaking her head at how silly that sounded out loud. "The loss of Edward would make the world a duller and darker place, so maybe that's why I'm so protective or whatever you guys tease me about, but it's how I feel."

"Christ," I breathed, pressing a heavy kiss to the middle of her forehead. I squeezed my eyes closed at the onslaught of burning tears that couldn't be shed. The fear through her thoughts was palpable, and she felt she didn't articulate it correctly. "You said it just fine, sweetheart," I whispered against her brow.

"I dunno," she huffed, wrinkling her nose again. "Maybe that fear followed me through my change. It just is."

"Maybe," Carlisle allowed, and I sat back to see him. "We carry a lot of things over when we change into immortality – fear, love, hope, grief." He gestured to me. "Edward carried the loss of his family, just like I carried mine. Esme carried her motherly instincts, which she immediately heaped all over Edward."

Grinning, I nodded. "That's true. No matter what she was dealing with emotionally, something inside her simply called for her to take care of me."

Bella's smile was warm and sweet. "Maybe you needed it."

Chuckling, I said, "Maybe I did."

Carlisle laughed at us outright. "Oh, he probably did. We were in dire need of a female opinion around the household by the time Esme came along."

Bella's giggle made us both smile. "Two immortal bachelors? I can't imagine the state of things," she teased us. "Laundry and dusty shelves and dirty shoes on the rugs… I imagine books everywhere."

"Yep. All of that," I told her, nodding like a kid, which always made her laugh.

She grinned, letting out another light laugh. "Poor Esme."

"Poor Esme indeed," Carlisle said, wearing an amused smile. He sat back in the chair, letting out a deep sigh. "You two have come a long way. I'm very proud of the both of you. I want you both to remember something – those fears you both mentioned are natural fears. We never want our other half to hurt, and we never want to lose them. That's normal in mated immortal couples, human couples, and it's especially true for you, considering your completi l'amina connection. You two take wonderful care of each other. You have since Bella was still human."

I nodded in agreement and in acceptance of his praise.

"Anything else?" Carlisle asked aloud, but his thoughts centered on the open mic night coming up tomorrow.

Chuckling, I asked, "You going tomorrow?"

"Well, yeah! It's been a long time," he replied with a grin.

Bella laughed. "It has. I'm interested in what songs everyone chooses."

"Including yours," I teased her.

"Mm, true. Knowing Emmett, he'll pick something dramatic for me."

My eyebrows lifted a little. I'd seen the song – or at least the band – that he was considering. Her voice would be a perfect fit. Even better, some of the lyrics were exactly right for my talented angel.

"And you know what it is," she said with a laugh and eyeroll at my grin.

"On that note," Carlisle muttered with a smile as he rose from the chair.

"One more thing," I said before he could leave. "What do you know about the problems Demetri and Marcus are managing?"

"A few immortals were feeding indiscriminately. If I'm not mistaken, the problems have been stopped," he replied softly. "Why, son?"

"After we arrive at Volterra, Bella and I were considering some small trips. I just didn't want to go anywhere there had been problems," I explained, shrugging a shoulder.

Carlisle thought for a moment, his mind in agreement with me. "That's probably a smart idea. When we call Demetri with our arrival date, we'll speak with him about those incidents. Maybe he can offer some safe destinations."

"Thank you," I replied.

He gave us a small smile and a wave before leaving through the front door. Bella shifted until she was straddling my lap and cupping my face. I welcomed her with no complaint, gazing into those deep-brown eyes. Her shield allowed her to keep her eye color, even though there were flecks of gold and honey in there. If I asked her to lift the shield, they'd be a deep, warm amber that showed her diet clearly. When she'd first been changed, the brown showed flecks of red.

Bella's smile was slow and beautiful. "I love the way you look at me. I used to think it was because you wanted to read my mind, but it's more than that."

"Oh, but I was dying to read your mind," I agreed with a laugh. "You look at me the same way."

"I know. We're ridiculously in love. It's cheesy and perfect and probably obnoxious to everyone around us. It'll never change, and I don't want it to."

I laughed at the way she put that, but she was right. "Nope."

She let a light giggle out before pressing a sweet kiss to my lips. "Okay, let's talk songs, handsome, and then I need to hunt before Emmett pushes me out on stage like some sort of rock goddess."

A laugh barked out of me. "Fine. We'll call them to discuss music, and then we'll hunt."

~oOo~

A/N… Let me say this again for one or two in the back. This series has always been for fun and music and drama. This isn't for the pretentious fic reader. It's for the loyal readers, who might need reminders, so they don't have to go back to reread 1,434,311 words of the last 4 fics in the series (which totally includes my pre-reader team).

Now, all that being said… Open mic night is next. Some of you are already guessing where the happy bubble pops, and some are close.

No songs added to the playlist.

See you guys next week. Mooches, Deb ;)