A/N: Wow. Guys. I am SO sorry it's taking me so long to update this! I've had MAJOR MAJOR writers block and been hella busy, but now that this chapter is out of the way I think I can get to the good stuff quickly! Hope you enjoy and leave me lots of fun reviews!


Porch Swing Confessionals

Lorelai woke up the next morning groggy, nauseated, and definitely alone. She noticed the lack of Luke's body next to her and was instantly sad. She huffed out a breath and stared at the ceiling, knowing the minute she moved she would be running for the toilet post haste. She turned her head slowly towards the clock. 9:30. She was late, and she really could care less.

Pregnancy is turning me into a slacker.

She gingerly sat up, trying not to wake the morning sickness fairies and moved the covers off of her legs. She stood up and slowly took two steps towards the closet.

Okay so far, so good. Three more feet to the closet, and I'll have made it further than yesterday. Slowly…don't rush, no big deal, you just have to get dressed. Almost…there. Shit.

She had made it two steps from the closet before she whirled around on her heels, making her nausea worse, and sprinted for the bathroom, she slid down the hall in her socks and barely made it to the bathroom before the meager contents of her stomach were displayed right there in front of her in the bright blue of the toilet water.

She heaved for the standard 30 minutes and then sat back against the wall, sweating, gasping and feeling just downright disgusting.

"You are going to be the death of me child."She said, patting her stomach. A few minutes later she'd managed to heft herself up off the floor and into the shower. Sometimes the warm water made her feel better, this was not one of those mornings. After two brief dry heaving episodes she had managed to shower and stepped out of the bathroom wrapped in Luke's huge blue terry cloth robe and smelling like Brilliant Brunette and Vanilla Bean Noel, two scents she had been able to withstand thus far.

She shuffled down the stairs in the robe and picked up the phone to call Sookie to tell her she'd be late.

"Hey Sook, it's me. I'm gonna be late today, I should be in by 11 or so but I just wanted to let you know so you wouldn't worry. If you need me before then call me, love ya! Bye!" she chattered into the phone.

She hung up the phone and went into the kitchen and smiled when she saw Luke had left her a note on the table.

He's so sweet.

She read the note and smiled, holding one hand on her stomach.

Breakfast for the love of my life. You two be good today, I'll see you tonight. I love you.-L

She nibbled on her muffin as she carried it and the tea he'd left her back upstairs so she could get dressed. She sat her tea on the dresser and pulled clothes out of the closet and proceeded to get ready for the day. She pulled on a pair of jeans and smiled to herself as she noticed they were a little snugger than normal. She pulled out a silky crème colored blouse and laid it on the bed and fished around for a pair of boots and her long tan coat.

She stood in the bathroom finishing straightening her hair with one hand and putting on lip gloss with the other.

I am the queen of multi-tasking. She thought as she put down the lip gloss and put on mascara. She capped the mascara and put down the straightener and checked her appearance before scampering back into her room and putting the rest of her clothes and her shoes on.

Nausea completely subsided; she traipsed out the front door feeling like a million bucks.

Rory's coming today.

The thought hit her like a mack truck. She'd forgotten about the fact that Rory was coming today.

I'm excited…but…what if…aaagh. Rory's coming. She hasn't seen me like this yet, not that there's all that much to see but she of all people will notice that I'm a little bigger…and that's a good thing. Deep breath. She's Rory, not your mother. Oh God…

Lorelai's hands gripped the steering wheel in a white knuckled death grip. She hadn't even fathomed the thought of telling her parents.

Don't worry about it now, just go to work and then go out with Rory. That's it. That's your day. Breathe Lorelai, breathe.

She pulled into the driveway of The Dragonfly and a wave of nausea hit her again. She slammed the Jeep into park and ran inside, brushing past Michel and to the bathroom next to her office, where she promptly expelled the contents of her stomach.

"Lorelai?" Sookie's voice said from the other side of the door, knocking softly. Lorelai washed her hands and opened the door, feigning a smile.

"You okay?" Sookie asked, noticing Lorelai's paled face and slightly clammy look.

"I'm fine. Just a bug, Luke thinks it's something I ate." Lorelai said, straightening her shirt and brushing off her pants.

"You look a little pale, maybe you should just go home and sleep." Sookie said, touching the back of her hand to Lorelai's forehead.

"Thanks Sook, but I'll be fine, I promise." Lorelai assured her as she walked out to the front desk to start the day.

After an hour the place settled into it's mid-day lull as far as the phone and sign-in went so Lorelai found herself sitting on a stool with her chin propped up on her hands staring out the window in front of her imagining.

She envisioned what her life would be like in less than a year. She saw herself and Luke sitting on a porch swing, a little bundle of purple in Luke's arms, her head on his shoulder playing with a tiny socked foot that stuck out of the end of the blanket. They looked so happy.

"Hey, Daydream Believer. Whatcha thinking about? You're smiling awfully big." She heard Sookie say behind her, snapping her out of her daydream.

"Rory's coming home tonight, just making plans in my head." Lorelai lied, badly.

"Right…it was about Luke wasn't it?" Sookie asked, making Lorelai blush. "Ha. I knew it! It was dirty too, you can't fool me."

"You got me." She lied miserably. If Sookie had been in her right mind, which due to the pregnancy she often wasn't, she would have seen right through it but instead she smiled her patented Sookie smile and pointed at her and laughed.

"Is everything ready for you to go?" Lorelai asked, knowing full well it wasn't.

"Almost…" Sookie said, taking her turn in the whole lying miserably thing.

Lorelai gave her a look and she scooted as fast as her very pregnant legs could scoot back into the kitchen. Lorelai looked after her and smiled, she'd probably be that big eventually.

God, so this is what it feels like. To be pregnant, happy, and in love. Sure I feel like crap every now and then, but this is what it feels like. I missed out on this the first time, not again.

The diner was hellaciously busy, and Luke felt like a chicken with his head cut off filling orders. Lane was in bed with the flu, and Caesar was proving his full potential and slacking off, so Luke was picking up the slack. Some of the customers had managed to drive him up to the "really pissed off" level that he only got to on occasion. Finally at about 4:30 the rush had slacked and now only Kirk, Patty, and some tourists were sitting at their tables, drinking coffee and chatting idly. Luke picked up a rag and leaned against the counter and wiped it down, taking a little bit of weight off his already tired feet. In the few minutes he'd had to stop and take a breath, whether it be a small lull in orders or in the 5 minutes he took to go to the bathroom and take some aspirin, he'd found himself daydreaming about their future. Not that he was daydreaming about it while he was actually peeing, but he'd been thinking about it all the rest of the time.

A customer with a little girl in a stroller and a boy, who looked about 3 at Luke's best guess, came in and had lunch and Luke had been surprisingly cheerful to them, to the surprise of the rest of the diner patrons.

He'd caught himself smiling more than usual today, and it felt good.

The bells jingled above the door a few minutes later, and he looked up from where he'd been standing filling the coffee maker. He knew without turning around that it was Lorelai.

"No." he said

"But I didn't even ask yet!" She whined. "How'd you know it was me?" she added as an after thought.

"Still. No." He repeated. He leaned over the counter and gave her a peck hello. "Shouldn't Rory be here soon?"

"She had a meeting for the paper until 5, so she'll be here around 7 which will give us plenty of time to get ready to go out." She said, adjusting a little on the seat.

"Nervous?" He asked.

"No." She lied. However, Luke could see right through her lies unlike Sookie. He reached out and covered her hand with his.

"You'll be fine." He said, giving her hand an affectionate squeeze. She smiled appreciatively and stole a glance at the donut tray and then looked back at Luke.

"One. We don't wan to spoil dinner. Rory would not approve." Luke said, uncovering the donuts and getting her out one with chocolate frosting and sprinkles.

She took the donut and happily picked at it and glanced up in surprise when Luke sat a big glass of milk in front of her.

"Don't even start. Drink it." He said shooting her a look. She pouted, but smiled when he stuck a crazy straw in it. "Crazy lady."

"Yeah, but you love me." She said as she blew bubbles in the milk. Luke opened his mouth to protest and then shook his head, knowing any efforts would be futile.

Luke finished up what he was doing and yelled to Caesar he was going upstairs and to lock up after he closed.

"I always do." Caesar yelled back. Luke rolled his eyes and walked around the counter.

"I'll pick you guys up at 8:30. Be ready." He said, Lorelai snuggling into him and resting her cheek on his shoulder.

"And by 8:30 you mean…" Lorelai questioned

"8:45." He answered, rolling his eyes again.

"Good boy." She said reaching up and patting him on the head and then ruffling his hair. She leaned forward and pecked him on the lips. She picked up her purse off the floor and left the diner headed home. Luke turned and went upstairs to get ready.

I have no idea what to wear to this. What do you wear on a dinner date with your pregnant girlfriend and her 21 year old daughter for the first time after the daughter has found out the girlfriend is pregnant? This should not be this difficult. God, so this is how a woman feels picking out clothes. My entire wardrobe is on the bed…and nothing looks right. I fucking hate getting dressed up.

Luke was in a grumbly mood the entire time he was getting ready. He didn't know why either, he was a little bit nervous about going out with Rory yes, but not overly so. He'd gone out with the two of them on many occasions. The only difference this time was that it was the first time he'd gone out with them with Lorelai being pregnant, but he was sure it wouldn't be the last time. He'd never been picky about what he wore, but he felt like it had to be "just right" tonight, and he'd spent a half hour standing in front of his closet in nothing but boxers and socks rummaging through his clothes. If Lorelai had seen him she would have mocked him for ages about him being such a woman. He'd showered and shaved before getting dressed and then watched TV for a half hour before going to Lorelai's, and he knew even before he got there that the two of them wouldn't be ready.

Lorelai had taken an exceptional shower, and being an exceptional shower it went on longer than it should have, but she didn't care. Rory had seen her in nothing but a towel more times than she could count, and this evening would be no exception.

"Mom?" she heard Rory call from the front door.

"Naked!" she yelled back. She could almost hear Rory cringe.

"You're alone right?" Rory called back tentatively

"Am I ever?" Lorelai called. "Give me a few minutes to get clothed. I'm almost ready."

"Yeah right, I need to change anyway." Rory called back, her voice sounding further away and Lorelai knew she'd gone into her room to change.

She pulled a pair of black pants out of her closet and stepped into them, noting how they were snugger than they had been last time, almost to the point of them not fitting and she smiled. From the side there was a noticeable pooch if you were really looking for it, and she was. Luke had noticed it too. She pulled a white button up out of her closet and put it on the bed to iron.

She went into the bathroom and curled her hair the way Luke likes it, and pinned part of it back in a messy half up type deal. She did her makeup like always, nothing new there except for she had a new sparkly pink lip gloss on top of her normal one that she'd bought at the drug store the day before.

Back in her room a few minutes later she ironed her shirt on the small ironing board she sat on her bed and then put her shirt on and pulled a vibrant, but not neon or "bright", pink sweater on over the button up so that the collar and cuffs stuck out of the scoop neck and sleeves. The sweater hugged her just right so that you could see, but not see the bump, and that made her happy. She picked up her shoes and then scampered down the stairs, running pell-mill into Rory, who'd begun her scamper up the stairs, halfway down.

They squealed and hugged each other the rest of the way back down the stairs, and when both had their feet firmly planted on the floor Rory pulled back and took a good long look at her mom.

"Just to speed this process along…" Lorelai said, turning sideways and tugging on the sides of her sweater a little to stretch it across her stomach. Rory gasped, squealed and jumped on her mom again, hugging her within an inch of her life.

"Easy killer. In order for me to have the baby I have to be alive. Funny how that works." She said pulling back from Rory, who's beaming smile matched the one Lorelai was wearing. After consulting the Tinkerbelle clock that sat on the desk they confirmed that they had less than ten minutes before Luke was to arrive, so they promptly sat down and started firing away without missing a beat.

Rory wanted to know everything. Lorelai filled her in on all the doctors visits so far, there had only been the one, and dragged her into the kitchen to show her the sonogram picture. It wasn't long after that Luke showed up and they were on their way to the restaurant in Hartford.

"It wouldn't be a car trip without…" Rory said fishing around in her purse.

Lorelai squealed and shouted in unison with Rory, "Ror and Lore's Car Jams!" as Rory produced a hot pink CD from her purse. Lorelai happily popped it in and Luke rolled his eyes and focused on driving while the two of them jammed out to Highway To Hell.

It wasn't until he'd endured "Secret Agent Man", "Manic Monday" and "If She Knew What She Wants" that a song came on that he actually knew. He hummed along with the intro and Lorelai feigned shock at his knowing the song, and then turned to look at Rory to yell again.

"Spring Break '92!" they chorused before launching into "Escape".

"If you like pina coladas! And getting caught in the rain! If you're not into yoga! If you have half a brain!" They sang loudly and off key. After the song was over Luke looked at Lorelai quizzically.

"What happened Spring Break '92?" He asked, frightened to hear the answer.

"I forget you haven't seen as many movies as me. Remind me to rent The Sweetest Thing when we get home. I think you'll get a big kick out of the penis song…" Lorelai said, making both Luke AND Rory blush.

Dinner went smoothly, most of the talk was about the baby and preparations they'd been making. Rory eventually hit the question Luke and Lorelai had both been anticipating.

"So have you thought about names?" she asked. Lorelai smiled at Luke. They had. When they'd discussed names it hadn't been as hard as it was for a lot of couples. They agreed on names easily and both liked the same names. It was quite scary actually.

"We've got a couple options. Right now my favorite girl name is Caroline and Luke's is Paige for a girl, and for a boy we're pretty much set on Parker." Lorelai said, shivering slightly. It was the first time they'd told anyone the names they'd considered, and only the second time they'd voiced them out loud.

Rory seemed happy with those names, and content for the reasons behind them. They spent desert talking about Yale, Logan and Paris. The drive back was in amicable silence listening to the easy listening station, much to the protests of Lorelai and Rory but they'd been too full to REALLY protest so they'd given into him easily and though neither one of them would admit it, they didn't mind the music all that much.

Luke pulled the Jeep into the driveway and they all exited the car. Luke went on ahead inside and Lorelai and Rory stayed on the porch in the swing to talk some more.

"I'll be in soon." She promised, giving him a quick kiss.

"Wear this. It's cold. We don't need you getting sick." He said wrapping his jacket around her arms and squeezing her shoulders. She beamed up at him and went back to the swing where Rory had taken a seat.

She sat down and crossed her legs under herself so she could look at Rory.

"What's on your mind kid?" she asked

"Nothing really." Rory said

"You can't lie to me. Spill it kid." Lorelai said, pulling Rory closer to her.

Rory felt like a five year old, but laid her head in Lorelai's lap anyway. Lorelai played with her dark hair as she began to vocalize what had been on her mind for the past couple days.

"I was just thinking last night and today about how different things are going to be for him or her. I mean, like…how different growing up is going to be than it was when I was growing up. It was just me and you for so long…and I loved it. I mean, I never really had a dad figure other than, well, dad on occasion, and Luke…and as much as I love Luke and wish he was my dad, he's not. I can't change that. I mean he can become my step-dad and I'll always think of him as a dad, but he's not…and he will be for this kid. It almost feels like I got…short changed. And that's not because it was just me and you for so long." Rory qualified her last statement quickly after feeling her mom tense up under her head. "This baby is going to have such an amazing childhood, just like I did because we both will have had you for a mom. But this kid will have had a beyond amazing mom and an amazing dad. And I think I'll always be a little jealous because Luke is actually his or her father, and he's not mine…you know? But then again I guess he or she could eventually be jealous of the relationship that we have…so I guess it equals out. I'm just talking mom. Ignore me. I shouldn't even be saying this out loud, especially not to you." She said, sitting up and looking at her mom who was fighting back tears.

"I know baby. I've always known you've felt a little short changed about Chris. I've always felt awful for the way things turned out with him…but just like you I wouldn't change it. This baby is going to have an equally amazing childhood, but it's not going to be any better than yours was. It's just going to be a little different, that's all. I'm sure that there will be things about it's childhood that are going to stink, just like parts of yours probably did because of your dad and me on occasion. But I don't want you to have to feel like you can't talk to me about the way you feel about the whole situation. You know I'll always be the last person to judge you. And I know Luke loves you just as much as he'll love this child. I know he sees you as a daughter even though legally you aren't one, but in his heart you are." Lorelai said, a single tear starting to run down her cheek.

"He's a dad in mine too." Rory said, leaning her head on Lorelai's shoulder. "He always will be."

"I love you." Lorelai said, hugging Rory to her, both of their tears from the whole conversation soaking each other's shoulders.

"I love you too, mom." Rory said, squeezing still tighter. They sat there on the porch, hugging and crying a little until Luke poked his head out the front door to inform them it was way too cold for them to be sitting outside. They headed inside, arms linked. Lorelai hugged her one more time and kissed her on the cheek before heading upstairs with Luke to go to sleep.

"Have a good chat?" Luke asked.

"Yeah." She said and was quiet again. "Luke?" she asked.

"Yeah babe?" he said from across the room where he was donning his pajamas.

"Are you afraid?" she asked, her voice trembling a little. Luke turned around and saw her staring at him, physically shaking.

"Lorelai, what's wrong baby? You can talk to me." He said hurrying over and sitting down next to her, wrapping his arms around her.

"I'm just scared. I…we…talked about when Rory was little, and I realized how…how…how short changed she got and I feel so awful about it and I don't want that to happen again. I'm scared that she's going to feel left out, or feel different or something. I'm afraid of messing things up between me and her and I'm afraid of raising another baby and doing this all over again. I'm afraid I'm not going to know what to do now that I have someone to help me. You know I'm not the most…non-stubborn person in the world and my only glimpse of dual parent upbringing is my own…and we know how great that turned out. I just don't want to fuck anything up. I don't want to be my parents…I don't want to alienate Rory but I want to give this baby everything I couldn't give Rory. I'm just…scared. I'm sorry. I'm rambling like Rory did earlier." Lorelai said, her voice slightly muffled into his shoulder.

"Lorelai. Look at me." He said turning her face towards him as she tried to look away. "You did amazing raising Rory, and you gave her everything you possibly could and more considering what you had to work with. You could not have done a better job raising that girl. She's a junior at one of the most prestigious colleges in America, hell the world probably, she's still got a 4.0 and is one of the most down to Earth, beautiful hearted people on the planet, and YOU did that. You did it by yourself, and you should really give yourself more credit. As for the whole not knowing anything about dual parenting other than what your parents did, we're going to be learning this together. It's going to be weird yes, but remember you have more experience in the parenting thing than I do, and that's going to help us through. We don't have to draw on anyone else's parenting tips or anything. We can do what we think is best. Yeah, I might have a little bit to draw on from my parents, but not really. We had to do a lot for ourselves after mom got sick…and I can't remember much about their parenting skills. So the answer to your question is yes, I'm scared, but I've also got you so I know it's going to be okay." He said. She leaned forward and kissed him, soft and lingering and then got up to go to the bathroom and change into her pajamas.

Sleep was the one thing Lorelai needed right then, and it made it better to be sleeping in Luke's arms with her daughter downstairs and knowing that their child, hers and Luke's not her's and Rory's….was safe inside her and that despite all of her fears…that things were going to be okay.