Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls or Buffy. If I did, I'd be really rich and hire people to write crossover fanfics for me.
A/N: I've been watching my Buffy DVDs and I couldn't help but think of what kindred spirits Spike and Jess could be. I have another fic in mind for them if I decide I like the way this one works out. This is set right before the big battle in Not Fade Away in the Buffy/Angelverse, and before Jess returns to Stars Hollow in Season 4 of GG. We'll see, we'll see. Title comes from Aside by the Weakerthans. Download it. Enjoy this!
In Love with Love and Lousy Poetry
Spike made his way to the bar, ignoring the patrons who were attempting to commend him on his poetry reading. He raised a hand in appreciation but shrugged off all the people trying to pat him on the back. He sat himself down on a barstool and raised an arm to the bartender.
"What'll ya have?" The bartender asked, walking over and smiling at Spike. She was a pretty redheaded woman in a tight black tank top.
"Whatever ya have on draft, love." Spike said. The woman behind the bar gave it to him and said, "Nice reading."
"Thanks." Spike said, taking the drink and attempting to hand her money for his beer. She shook her head. "Poets drink on the house." She winked and walked away.
From next to him, Spike heard a small snort of laughter. He glanced over at the young man sitting next to him, who was writing in a notebook and drinking a beer.
"What's so funny, mate?" Spike asked, turning to the face the dark-haired young man.
He shook his head. "Nothing." He said, not looking up.
"Well, keep it nothing." Spike said, attempting to be domineering. He couldn't help from smiling though. He was still on a high from his poetry being so well received.
The young man finally looked up at him, staring at him with dark eyes that held something familiar, something Spike recognized.
"The word 'effulgent' is stupid." He said before looking back down at his notebook. Before his hand came around to cover it, Spike caught a glimpse of the words 'Dear Rory.'
"Careful, boy." Spike said, sniffing. "You're not old enough to be in here, and I'd be happy to tell that to my new friend." He nodded at the bartender.
This time the young man's head shot up. He turned to Spike and asked in a slightly amused voice, "How'd you know that?"
"When you've been alive as long as I have, you get to be a good judge of age." Spike said. "And effulgent is not a stupid word. What would you have used?" He flicked his eyes over the page of the notebook. "Resplendent. Now there's a word to scoff at." He made his point by scoffing.
"You're reading over my shoulder?" The young man asked in disbelief.
Spike rolled his eyes. "Well if it's so off-putting to ya…" Spike scanned the page again and found the boy's signature, "why are you writing in a public place, Jess?"
Jess sighed and tore the page out of his notebook, crumpling it into a ball. "Jeez." He mumbled, dropping the paper ball on the bar. For the first time, Spike noticed several other crumpled papers sitting on the bar.
Spike smirked in understanding. "I get it. Always fun to see a little boy in love." He held his glass up. "Cheers."
Jess shook his head, growing angry. "What the Hell would you know about it?" He asked, taking a sip of his own beer which was purchased with a fake ID.
Spike laughed. "Quite a bit, actually. Love, loss, redemption." He sighed. "More loss. I've been there. About to hit more redemption, though it won't do a bit of good. For me, anyway." He was babbling a little, but the young man didn't seem to be fully listening.
"Redemption." Jess said distastefully. "Like that's even possible."
"Bloody right, it's possible." Spike said, annoyed at his disbelief. "Figure out what it takes, make the big gesture, find your soul." Spike finished his beer and gestured for another one. "Yeah, it's possible."
"How do you even know if you have a soul?" Jess asked bitterly.
Spike laughed. "You know. You know."
"How?" Jess asked again.
"Because it bleeding burns like Hell." Spike said as though it was obvious.
Jess was silent for a moment and then asked, "Is that what that is?"
"Well, yeah." Spike said. "That or heartburn. Eat a lot of spicy food?"
Jess stared at Spike like he was insane. "What? There's something wrong with you."
"Just messing around with ya, boy. Grow a sense of humor. You'll never survive without one." Spike said.
"Probably won't survive with one either." Jess mumbled.
"I hear that." Spike agreed, looking at the clock above the bar. It was almost time for him to go.
Jess finished his beer and said, "A guy can only take so much of feeling like all he does is screw up, ya know?"
Spike shook his head in amazement. It was like talking to himself. "I know all about it, mate. Comes a time that a man has to either own up to being a monster, or try to be something more."
"Still probably won't be enough." Jess mumbled. He didn't know why he was talking this openly. Maybe it had something to do with the three beers he'd had, or maybe with the fact that 'Spike,' as he'd been introduced on stage, seemed to have a pretty decent grip on this 'love and loss' thing, even if his poem had sucked.
"Never can tell 'til you try." Spike said. "Gotta do something, cuz otherwise do you have? Regrets, alcohol, and some bad poetry. Or in your case, crumpled up letters to a bird named Rory."
"And if you're not good enough?"
Spike laughed. "Boy-o, that hasn't stopped one man in the history of the world."
"She's different though." Jess said, his voice growing soft. "She's special. She's-"
"The one girl in all the world?" Spike asked bitterly. "I had the one. Your bird isn't any different from any of them."
"She goes to Yale." Jess said softly, proudly.
"My girl saved the world…a lot. So what's your point?" Spike asked. "You're gonna do what ya want, mate. Don't expect a conversation with a stranger's gonna change you much. Let me tell ya though, the only thing worse than having 'the one' in your life is not having her."
"Maybe." Jess said, looking down at the blank page before him.
"No. No maybe." Spike said. He looked at the clock again. He stood up. "Time to fight the good fight. Good luck to ya."
"What if it isn't enough?" Jess asked, spinning around on his bar stool.
Spike turned around and smiled sadly. "You'll burst into flames, but hopefully you'll save the world in the process."
End