Authors note: Chapter 2.. up and going..

Oro: whaddaya mean poor Japs? Poor me.. Jack has come back to haunt me!

Chapter 2: Bang Bang

Great..just great.. I glare at Jasper.
"You just hád to open the door.. you just didn't want to believe me, did you? Now look at what you've done! We've got a pirate in your bedroom!". With my hands on my hips I glare at my boyfriend.

Jasper is staring at Jack, who is leaning against the closet door, keeping it closed, panting heavily.
"Lona.. why is there a Johnny Depp look-a-like, dressed like a pirate, standing in my bedroom?"

I glance at Jack, something is wrong here.. I just can't seem to figure out what..
"Because you opened the door..that's why"

Jasper slowly nods..
"Right.. I'm going back to bed.. when I wake up.. I trust this nightmare will be over". As in a trance he walks back to bed, lies down and pulls the covers over his head.

-Blink- Riiigght.. I agree with the nightmare part.. but somehow I don't think it'll be over when he wakes up. I walk over to Jack, who still hasn't said anything.

"Jack, are you okay? You're awfully quiet all of a sudden.. "
Jack only shakes his head, and slides down on the ground. Unconscious. What the..?
"What do you think you're doing? You can't just pass out here, did you drink too much again?.. wake up Jack" I grab his arms and try to haul him upright, but something warm and liquid runs down my fingers. Blood..

Startled I drop Jack, who moans in pain. Great.. just great.. I turn on the lights and walk over to Jack, turning him around on his back. A quick inspection shows me that Jack has this ghastly looking wound in his right shoulder.. practically a hole. "Y'know Jack.. Bloody Pirate is not to be taken THIS seriously!" I grumble.

With a sigh I pull the covers from Jasper, who is pretending to be asleep.
"Wake up"
"I'm asleep.. And I will remain asleep until that person has left"
"Jasper.. unless you help me.. that person will bleed to death.. on your carpet.. and trust me.. blood is extremely difficult to remove from carpets.."

He opens one eye and scowls at me.
"So I'll throw away the carpet.. What's he doing here anyway?"
"You opened the door!"
"So? It's my door! I didn't expect to find a famous actor inside" Jasper mutters as he sits up and pulls on a t-shirt.
" So? So now you have a problem.. A problem with a capital S.. Sparrow, not Depp.. Sparrow"

Only in his shirt and boxers Jasper examines the wound. Yay for boyfriends with First Aid diploma's!
"The wound itself isn't too bad.. so why is he bleeding like that?" Hmm.. sexy quasi doctor mumbling.. Erhm.. sorry.

He frowns and bends forward a little, sniffing Jacks breath and immediately pulling back again.
"Whew.. no wonder he's bleeding like mad.. it smells like he has emptied at least 10 bottles of alcohol"
"10? He must be trying to easy down a little"

Jasper doesn't respond, but walks to the bathroom, barefoot. He returns with some bandages and something to disinfect the wound. "He should be going to the hospital, you know?"
"Yeah I know.. but how would you explain to them that we've got Johnny Depp.. most likely shot down? Not to mention drunk?"
He sighs, tying up the last of the bandages.

"You're probably right, well.. this should stop the bleeding for at least a little while.. now what?"
"Find him some place to sleep?"
"Hm.. do you think he would mind to sleep in the back yard?"
"Jasper!"
"What? He smells!"

-sigh- Men..
"Can't he sleep in your sisters bed? Seeing as she won't be home for another few weeks?"
"Sure.. I guess we don't have any other option.. hope she won't miss the blankets and pillows.. seeing as we'll have to BURN them after this"
"Jasper!"
"Sorry"

We're standing there.. watching Jack.. who is still lying there..
"So.. how do we get him there?" I ask.
"Carry him I suppose"
"Well.. what are you waiting for then?"
"Me?"
"Yes you! I can't carry him! He looks heavy!"

After a short argument, which I won.. of course.. Jasper finally concedes and is now dragging Jack to another room.
I take off the robe and go back to bed. By the time Jasper is back, I'm asleep.

The next morning

"AAAAAAAAHH NOOOOOOO.. GET IF OFF! IT STINGS!" "NO! LEAVE IT ON! BAD PIRATE! BAD PIRATE!"
Hm.. sounds like Jack is awake. And Jasper is trying to clean the bandages. Great. A lot of noise is coming from upstairs, almost as if they're fighting. I hear thumps, and cloings, and boffs.. and then.. complete silence.

I slide the baguettes into the oven and set the timer. After a few seconds I hear someone screaming again.
"Get your filthy hands off me, mate!" "Who are you calling filthy! Not even the garbage container smells that bad!" "The what!"." And I'm not your mate!"
Shrugging I continue reading my book, Leonardo, The Man and The Artist. Great book. Not a single pirate in it.. great.

A lot of stumbling, dropping and crushing/crashing noises.. and a sudden -thud- sound that sounds strangely awkward. With a very disturbing silence after that..

"Bloody.. LONA!" "Damnit.. LONA!" Two men.. both screaming my name at the same time.. Somehow I feel that I will never forget this moment.. too bad they're screaming for the wrong reason.

Sighing I lay my book aside and walk upstairs. I open the door only to see great chaos throughout the whole area. Doors have been thrown open, bottles with ointment strewn across the floor, aspirins scattered everywhere, pieces of broken glass, clothes.. and in the midst of it all.. crouching on the bathroom floor.. Jack and Jasper. Jasper is clutching his eye while looking very pissed off and Jack is trying to avoid my stare.

I can almost feel my mouth dropping open.
"What has happened here? I only asked you to clean his wound and refresh the bandages.. and you very nearly succeeded in wrecking the house!"

"He hit me!" " He hurt me!" The two men are talking at the same time, both trying to get me to listen to him first.
"Enough already! Jasper you first.. why are you covering your eye.. what happened?"

Jasper takes his hand from his face.. revealing a beautifully red eye.
"Your great and fantastic Captain Sparrow just hit me.. without reason!"

DumDum Dum… another chapter finished. In the next one I'll explain why Jack hit Jasper and why Jack got shot..

Love, Lona