The time between night and morning felt like years, especially when the time was spent solely on memorizing the rhythm of Tori's steady breathing. She tossed and turned a lot like even sleep wasn't a place of total comfort for her. A few times, she had sighed a low and gentle hum as she shifted her position under the covers. It was impossible to not feel incredibly warm while wrapped up in the same sheets as Tori Vega. If this sweltering heat was suffocation, Jade never wanted to breathe.
It was finally morning, around 7:20 and Tori was already waking up. Jade carefully turned back over and pretended she hadn't been staring at the other for hours. Tori had cycled through all sorts of tangled-up and crooked positions, but as she finally sat up and stretched her arms in the air, Jade looked over her shoulder and couldn't describe her view as anything other than perfect.
Tori hummed as she stood, and turned to smile at Jade who appeared to be just waking up. "No Cat, huh?"
"Haven't heard her," Jade mumbled. "What time is it?"
Tori reached for her phone on the nightstand. "Almost seven-thirty."
Jade groaned and buried her face back in the pillow. "Why do you wake up so early?"
Tori shrugged. "I'm my mother's daughter, I dunno. I can leave you alone so you can sl-"
"No! No… you're fine," Jade trailed off when Tori's face reflected confusion. "I didn't sleep that well."
Tori grimaced. "Uh oh. Did I do something?"
"No, I-I just don't sleep well at other people's houses. Makes me nervous, or whatever." Jade mumbled, hoping Tori wouldn't make a big deal of things.
The brunette frowned. "Okay, so… I shouldn't go make us some coffee then?"
Jade's eyes widened. "Nevermind. I won't say no to coffee," she smirked, making Tori grin and look to her feet. Something about the way she looked at Tori made her feel this indescribable joy and relief.
Tori quietly left the room and Jade slapped a hand to her forehead. "You fucking idiot, what are you doing," she muttered to herself.
Waking up next to Tori? It was like a dream, and incredibly hard to believe it was real. She turned to the side Tori had been sleeping on and smiled as she remembered how adorable Tori's face was while she was asleep. The slightest little scowl remained throughout the night, only to be broken by yawns or other body movements. Jade could faintly smell Tori's floral shampoo on the pillow next to her. She had a fleeting thought to take the pillow and hug it close to her face, and as soon as that horrifying yearning thought left her mind, she was up and getting her backpack across the room to change.
As soon as Tori made it downstairs, she noticed her mom sitting at the kitchen table. She glanced toward the couch, Cat was still sleeping there.
"Good morning," Tori whispered as she tiptoed toward the coffee maker. She was taken aback by the glare Holly shot back at her.
" Why is Cat sleeping on the couch alone?"
Why is that a problem? Tori thought. "Because she wouldn't stop sleeping-talking. And the talking turned into walking, and well... Jade and I just wanted some peace and quiet so we could actually sleep."
Holly hummed in response and looked back at her phone. "You let Jade sleep in your bed?"
Tori's eyes darted around, wondering what the problem was. Holly was clearly upset and disapproving of this situation. "Yeah…"
"I hope you were behaving."
Tori threw her hands in the air. " What - how would we have… what do you mean?"
"You know what I mean, Tori-"
"No, I-I really don't!"
Holly shook her head and wouldn't elaborate. Drinking, drugs, like… no? She knows I wouldn't do that, especially right now…
Tori tried to continue with her coffee-making process, but Holly's exaggerated movements and throat clearing caused her to speak up again.
"So, what, you just don't like her?"
"I didn't say that-" Holly began before Tori plowed through her mom's words with her own.
"You didn't have to! I promise, she's not a bad influence or whatever, and nothing weird was going on. Please, mom, she's like my best friend."
Holly broke out in a scoff. "Yeah, right."
"Shhh!" Tori hissed, glancing over to Cat.
"Sorry," Holly deflated a little bit. Tori tried to read her face that seemed to relax to a less agitated state. "I'm sorry, Tori. I still have memory of how Jade was to you before the accident."
The coffee maker began beeping once it was ready, but Tori ignored it and leaned against the counter to look at her mom. "I have read virtually every single text message between Jade and Me the last… year and a half. I think I've made it back that far."
Holly scowled, at first shocked to hear this until she realized her phone is probably the biggest source of information for her. Her daughter continued.
"Trust me, I know tons of things Jade did. They're mean and nasty, I know. But at the end of the day, I kept being her friend throughout it all. Clearly, she had grown more recently, like we were definitely somewhat close before this thing happened? You let me go on a camping trip with her, alone in the woods for a weekend. I mean, come on, mom. I know you're scared of Jade because she's all dark and whatever-"
"I'm not scared of her," Holly pouted and crossed her arms.
"Riiiight," Tori replied sarcastically. "I know I'm not scared of her. She's my best friend, and she's really sweet. She makes me so happy and I wish you could trust her, and me, a little more. I know how hard it must be. I know it's confusing and weird, but I don't want you to hate Jade. She's the last person I'm worried about."
She watched as her mom took a deep breath and refined her posture. "Okay, you're right. I'm sorry. I should be more accepting of who you're comfortable with."
The brunette smiled before turning to the cupboard to grab two mugs. "How was dinner last night?"
Holly laughed nervously. "It was… great?"
Tori's face fell to disappointment. "What happened?"
"They couldn't stop apologizing about the accident and bringing the conversation back to you. They specifically said 'we should hang out to get your mind off of things,' and then did the complete opposite of that."
"Huh, never thought I would be upset to hear that people were thinking of and asking about me," Tori mumbled. "I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault, and it's not a problem. Is Cat still sleeping?"
A small voice sounded from the other room, "Hiii!"
Tori had a mug of coffee in each of her hands as she made her way toward the stairs. "How long have you been awake?"
"Like, ten seconds," Cat yawned. "Wait, why am I down here? What happened?!"
"Give me a minute to bring coffee to Jade, and I'll be right back down to explain everything," Tori replied soothingly.
Cat nodded and stretched her arms upward. "Good morning, Mrs. Vega!"
"And to you, dear," Holly replied. "Have you always talked in your sleep?"
Tori could hear the conversation continue as she carefully carried the mugs upstairs, giggling at the way Cat gasped upon learning she had a restless night herself. She froze in the doorway when she caught a glimpse of pale arms pulling a shirt down over… oh. In the split second of what she saw, Tori's heartbeat doubled in tempo.
"Oh! Sorry! Sorry…"
Jade turned and smiled, not flinching a bit. "It's chill. No worries."
Now she was standing and facing Tori with a gray T-shirt and black lace panties on. Tori turned her head away as if looking at Jade's bare skin was like staring directly into the sun. Jade noticed Tori's awkwardness, thinking she wouldn't remember most high school gym classes and changing in the locker rooms, let alone all of the costume changes behind stage for shows.
"You don't need to cower away, you've seen all this before," Jade said with a soft tone.
Tori could also put two and two together. It was obvious that girls who were friends saw each other change sometimes. It's just that Jade was… undeniably hot and Tori felt guilty looking, like she wasn't supposed to look at her and feel this way.
"Oh, okay. Here's some coffee."
You could cut the air between the two girls with a knife as Tori handed Jade the coffee. Blue eyes watched as Tori's glance fell downward again, and smirked at the opportunity Tori chose to take before Jade would pull some pants on.
"Thank you," Jade hummed into her mug. "I love Recess coffee."
Tori had already turned away again but snapped her head back around at Jade's comment. "How do you know it's from Recess?"
"I know it's your favorite. And it's not my first time waking up here either," Jade smirked before sipping her coffee. It was still scorching hot but she didn't even flinch.
Tori was awkward in response, "Oh! Um. Have you ever… slept…" her hand motioned toward the bed, and Jade simply shook her head to answer Tori's question.
"I didn't mind, though."
Tori wasn't sure if she felt like she was going to laugh or cry. Everything always felt somehow 'wrong' with Jade, only because of how nervous Tori was around her. But at the same
time, Tori had never felt so right in her life.
"Cat's awake, you should come downstairs when you're ready," Tori spoke in a quiet tone before slipping out the door. It wasn't until she was outside of her room again that she could catch a proper breath.
It was impossible to feel calm throughout the day until lunch. And that was hardly calm after the big announcement of the "prome" date. What a horror story, literally, that was for Tori to hear throughout lunch. Not only the clips Jade was playing on a giant screen to terrorize everyone, but Tori's idea to even call it a "prome."
"I don't even know that I want to go to a prom," Tori confessed.
"Prome," Robbie corrected before chuckling to himself. Tori glared, considering how much she had already been mocked for the name.
"Why not?" Jade asked. "I'd love to make this one significantly less miserable for you."
Andre glanced at Jade curiously. Something about her hand position changed every time she spoke to Tori - either clasped together, rubbing her legs, brushing her shoulders or fixing her hair.
"I don't know. They're loud and chaotic. I just don't know if I'm ready for something like that."
"That's fair," Beck chimed in. "Think about it. It's not for another few weeks."
"Everyone's going to be dying to ask Tori as a date!" Cat's voice rose higher in pitch as she poked Tori's arm and smiled wider. If Jade didn't distract herself by pulling out her phone, she would have rolled her eyes and groaned loud enough for the entire asphalt cafe to hear.
"Nooo," Tori groaned. "I don't want to deal with that either!'
"Why not! It might feel nice to feel desired by total strangers," Cat encouraged, still touching Tori's arm with her hand.
"No. I have no interest in going to a school event that I created and having everyone suffocate me the entire night.'
Jade understood where Tori was coming from, but it hurt to hear Tori turn down a social event like this. It was the first time she had rejected a night like this, usually she would be the life of the party and make herself be the last person out of the event.
"Tori, if you change your mind, I could always take you so guys aren't swarming you like angry bees all night."
Jade's head snapped up from her phone, looking for a reaction from Tori. She stared blankly in Becks' direction. "You... What?"
"I could be your 'pretend' date, you know, as a friend if you wanted-"
"Please, not this again," Robbie croaked. "Beck, maybe that's not a good idea-"
"I think it's a great idea-" Jade interrupted, her voice flaring with rage. "Beck gets to manipulate a girl into going to something she's already said twice now that she's not interested in!"
"No! No, I- um. I don't, well I'm not sure how I'll feel then and-"
Beck rolled his eyes and held his hands in the air. "What's the problem?"
Cat's hand moved from Tori's arm as she covered both of her ears with her hands. Huh?
"The problem is that you can't keep it in your pants!"
Andre couldn't help himself from laughing nervously. "Shit-"
Beck's voice was loud now. "I literally said as a friend!"
But Jade's voice was louder. "And I'm literally calling BULLSHIT."
"Jade, I'm not going with Beck!" Tori's voice finally cut through the two voices. Beck's shoulders fell as he slowly turned to Tori. She looked to Jade, full of concern and fear. "Sorry, but if I end up going, it's not even going to be for long, anyway." Tori looked back to Beck, whose scowl was almost as unsettling to Tori as Jade's. "You should ask someone else."
All of the anger in Jade's face melted away after locking eyes with Tori again. She thinks I still like Beck. That's why she's saying this. Fuck, she has no clue.
Tori was confused, to say the least, at how Jade suddenly looked like she was going to cry. "This isn't your fault. You didn't do anything, I just…"
Cat began to uncover her ears after seeing that Jade and Beck weren't interesting anymore. Everyone at the table saw the way Jade looked at Tori with such desperation. Suddenly, she was up with her bag pulled up to her shoulder and leaving the table. Tori's eyes followed Jade as she walked back into the building, the whole time nobody spoke.
"I'll take you dress shopping if you want?" Cat attempted with a sweet and gentle voice.
Tori let out a halfhearted chuckle. "Thanks, but I'm not sure that's going to be necessary."
"Tori, I'm sorry, I didn't-" Beck attempted to apologize, but Tori couldn't even look at him.
"It's okay, um. Andre, do you wanna come with me to my locker?"
He smiled immediately upon realizing how much he had missed hearing that question. "No prob." He glanced at Beck with a confused expression, though he believed he knew the exact cause of Jade's emotional outburst.
Lunch was almost over anyway so Tori knew the others wouldn't be too far behind. She spoke up quickly before they had even made it back into the school. "I thought Jade didn't like him anymore?"
Andre shrugged. "She doesn't."
Tori stared blankly at Andre. "Okay, so explain what just happened please? I must be missing something."
Her friend sighed nervously. "There's a lot to this story-"
"I need to know so I can assure Jade I'm not going to step over any boundaries I might not know exist right now-"
"Jade is not mad at you, so please don't worry about that one," Andre said firmly, making sure Tori looked him in the eyes when he said it.
Tori was so worried she had caused a problem. She would have asked Jade directly after lunch if she didn't storm off so quickly.
"Okay, please tell me the rest then."
Andre pushed the doors open and held them for Tori. "After they broke up, Beck tried to get with you."
Tori rolled her eyes. "Of course he did. Okay, and?"
Andre smirked at Tori's blatant uninterested feelings for Beck. "This is going to sound weird, but Jade watched you reject Beck that night over a video call right as he was about to kiss you-"
She interrupted, "Wait, when did this happen?"
Andre took a second to think. "Umm, right around the time you sang at the Platinum Music Awards which was… about seven months ago?"
"Okay, right. Still can't believe that happened by the way," Tori muttered underneath her breath.
"It was pretty dope," Andre laughed. "But anyway, you said to Beck, 'Jade's my friend, I can't date my friend's ex-boyfriend,' or something like that."
This information was unbelievable to Tori, like she would never in a million years truly picture herself being attracted to Beck. "Gross, was I really thinking about it?"
Andre winced. "Maybe a little?"
She groaned again. "God, okay. But I mean Jade saw that whole thing happen, so did I like to talk about it with her and were we okay afterward?"
He smiled comfortingly, "You were very okay after that. You two were like, actually friends after that and she stopped torturing you."
Tori's face indicated worry again. "Okay, but if she was so happy with me for doing that, then she must really like Beck, right?"
Andre shook his head. "Please, trust me when I say that I know for a fact that she doesn't. Here's the other part you need to know."
"Oh God," Tori sighed. She leaned against her locker and took a deep breath.
"Beck kissed Jade a few weeks ago. The night of the Laramie auditions."
This made Tori want to throw up. She knew she had something against Beck that she couldn't put her finger on. "What? Why?"
Andre rolled his eyes. "I asked him the same thing. I don't know, they were working on lighting for some show across town together for a few weeks. They were probably starting to get comfortable with each other again, and he just had the wrong idea. So if anything, the only one with feelings around is Beck, for Jade." Well, not the only one, Andre thought.
Tori looked up to the ceiling. "None of this makes sense to me, still. Why would she be mad if he didn't have feelings for her anymore if she doesn't?"
He nodded slightly, looking to the floor as he thought of how to word this carefully. "This is just my theory, but I think that she's just annoyed that he could kiss her like two weeks ago, but then turn right around and hit on you. She's scared of feeling replaceable. I think that's why a lot of what she does is very extreme."
Tori shook her head vigorously. "He wasn't hitting on me, was he?"
Andre smirked. "You don't know Beck that well yet. He's a huge flirt, he's very good at masking it with a vaguely apathetic attitude."
"See, this is why I've told Jade like three times already that he's not my type."
"Can't blame ya there. He's a great guy, but he can be kind of a player."
"Clearly," Tori exhaled. No wonder Jade didn't have a great handle on her emotions while they were dating. "So, do I talk to him about what happened, or?"
"No, I can handle it. I got a lot to say to him," Andre huffed and adjusted his shoulders. "And I can talk to Jade, too." he rested a hand on Tori's shoulder gently. "Just please trust me, she's not mad at you."
Tori appreciated his gentle touch as she nodded. "Okay. Thank you, Andre, seriously."
"No worries, anytime. I'll catch ya later."
She pulled her phone out of her back pocket and immediately began to text Jade.
Today 11:58 AM
I'm really sorry if anything I did hurt you. please let me know if you want to talk or if I can do anything
Cat watched as Jade read a text from her phone and immediately grunted upon slamming a fist into her locker. Cat yelped, causing Jade to immediately regret her outburst. "Cat, I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you. I'm such a dumb bitch-"
"Why are you so mad?" She whimpered. "I don't get it, you don't like Beck any-"
"No, I don't," Jade laughed, pressing her lips together and holding back tears. "Why does he think he can just move in on Tori like that? It's literally her second day back at school and he's already back on his fuckboy bullshit."
Cat couldn't blame Jade for still having negative feelings around him. He made Jade jealous on purpose several times just to try to convince her she's trustworthy, but at the end of the day, all it did was made Jade's trust issues worse. "I don't think he would actually make a move so soon, though?"
"No, not so soon. Just like, in another two weeks when he decides he can kiss another girl who doesn't want to be kissed by him. Again. " Jade took a moment to focus on the real reason she was upset here: Tori would think she's a monster. Finally, she had seen Jade in the element she had spent months trying to reverse. Angry and crass Jade surfaced and made the situation about her on accident again, and this would just add to the list of horrible things she's ever done that Tori is learning bit by bit.
"Tori's going to hate me. She's not going to believe anything I say anymore. I am on such thin ice with her it's not even funny, if I keep exploding like that she'll think of me the exact same way she did before and-"
"Thin ice?" Cat echoed. "Jade, she really likes you."
Jade stared at the ceiling. "What are you talking about?"
The redhead giggled quietly like she had a secret. "I heard her talking to her mom about you at the sleepover."
Oh my God. "What? What did she say?"
"That you're not a bad influence, and you're her best friend. She wanted her mom to trust you more. You're the last person she's worried about… she said you're sweet."
Jade scoffed, in denial that Tori had said these things so soon. "She told this to you and her mom?"
Cat blinked. "Oh no, they thought I was sleeping."
The other nodded slowly. "Ah, eavesdropping." Jade's amusement disappeared quickly once she remembered the recent situation at hand. "Great, and I just ruined all of that in sixty seconds." she hissed before slamming her locker and attempting to walk away. Cat grabbed her by the wrist before she could escape, making Jade squeeze her eyes shut. Don't cry. Don't cry.
"Jade," Cat began carefully. "Did Tori text you? Is that why you slammed your locker?"
"Yes," Jade whined. "Okay?"
"What did she say?"
"She said she was sorry if anything she did hurt me, and said we could talk if I wanted to-"
"Okay, so that's how Tori feels. She said that herself and everything you are scared of her feeling is just made up fear in your head. It's not real. So you should talk to her, okay?"
Cat knew that at the end of the day, most of Jade's anger was sourced from anxiety. Cat had known Jade for years and it took most of that time to figure out how Jade works. Now that she understands, she would never hesitate to support her the best she could.
"You're right. I'm sorry, Cat."
"It's okay, " she urged. "But I'm worried about your fist."
Jade pulled her hand up to look at it. "Kiss it better?"
"Ew, no."
Blue eyes narrowed. " Ew?"
"Germs! Hands have germs! Lots of them!"
The other girl squinted into Cat's face. "I-I think I see something weird in your mouth, is that a sore?"
Cat shrieked and flailed her hands. "No! Can you look, please?" She stuck out her tongue only for Jade to wipe the palm of her hand down it before running away from Cat.
"Tori! What a pleasant surprise," Sikowitz beamed.
Tori was too scared to approach him. "We scheduled tutoring on Monday and Wednesdays after school?"
"I'm sorry, did I say 'surprise'? I meant to say soup prize!"
Please, can we just talk about the script or anything else other than this? "Soup prize?" Tori was fighting the urge to have a sour attitude with her teacher.
"Yes. Congratulations, you have won this can of soup!" Apparently, his sweater pocket was large enough to store a can of soup. Something about the entire vision of a can of soup being pulled out of a strange man's sweater made Tori dread reaching out to take it from him.
I'm "Thank… you," she muttered while immediately tucking it in her bag.
"This is fun. I get to freak you out all over again!"
"It's working," she nodded before taking a seat.
"How is school going so far? It's only been two days back at Hollywood Arts and you are feeling…" he motioned his hand toward her, prompting her to finish the sentence.
"Sad," Tori replied instantly, the situation with Jade still clouding her head.
He frowned. "What about?"
I can't talk about it, can I? Should I? "It's just some stupid drama."
"Ooo, please share!" The man grinned and held his balled fists to his chin. "You know, I am a drama teacher."
Tori smiled, as she appreciated bad puns from time to time. "I don't know, something with Beck and Jade-"
"Of course, I knew it would be," he interrupted with a matter-of-fact tone.
Seriously? Even the teacher is in with all of the social dynamics around here? She continued cautiously. "He offered to take me to the dance as a friend, so a bunch of guys wouldn't try to ask me or whatever."
Sikowitz began laughing that haunting, hysterical laugh again. "So Jade was mad-"
"Yeah, I just don't know why," Tori scowled and slumped in her seat.
The teacher began to stand from his chair. "The truth shall reveal itself once it is done harvesting its crops."
Tori shook her head out of her daydream about Jade. She glanced up at Sikowitz with a furrowed brow. "What?" What the hell does that even mean?
He clapped his hands together and changed the subject immediately. "Let's talk about Laramie!"
"Please," Tori scoffed as she pulled her script out of her bag. "So, I have a few questions-"
"Please read Rebecca's part on page 490 please!"
"Okay!" Tori scrambled to find the page and fixed her posture. She began reading the same dialogue she and Jade had practiced last week, losing focus as all of the words brought her back to the moment she was staring at Jade while she was reading on the following page. With every next word she spoke, she wished it was Jade's voice against her eardrums instead of her own. She had no idea what she was doing and figured Sikowitz would have tons of criticism anyway, so she tried to do her best with the very little knowledge of acting that she had.
She didn't dare look up at her teacher's face until he stopped her halfway through the second paragraph of the text. He had a small smile on his face. "Tori, you're supposed to be bad at this."
Her lips trembled. "What? It was bad?"
"No, silly goose! It's good. I'm impressed. Keep going."
She did. Her thoughts of Jade continued, and soon she realized she was just trying to speak how she remembered she did when they had practiced. Sikowitz changed his position in his seat, placing a hand on his chin in the classic pondering pose.
"... 'There's a student I think you should meet. His name is Jedadiah Schultz.'"
Sikowitz raised his eyebrows. "So, you and Jade have already practiced."
Tori laughed. "How can you tell?"
"Well one, it was obvious she was itching to see you last week." Tori's heart began pounding as she remembered when Jade had been texting her during his class. "And two, you sounded almost exactly like her just now. Which was a little scary, we don't need two Jade's in the world."
Well, now she was embarrassed. Nothing got by Sikowitz, apparently. It was alarming how well he knew his students. This must be why everyone calls him a genius though, and it's not even ironic.
"Sorry. I know that's probably not what you're looking for."
"It's expected, given what you're working from. We'll fix it," he said assuringly. "There's another thing I want to fix as well."
Tori's heart began pounding in her chest at the guilt of messing up. "What?"
"Try it on stage. Take your script, I just want you to stand up there."
She was afraid this would happen. "But, how's that different than just, sitting here and reading? Where it's less... exposed down here?"
"You'll feel more pressure to act, and not just read. Even if you're not fully acting, something different will come out of you just from standing up there. You'll see."
She nodded and did as he asked. It was impossible to not hear Jade's voice speaking all of these words, but Tori thought maybe she wasn't trying to mimic her as much. Her feet moved her around the stage a bit, it was a nervous habit of Tori to pace.
As she finished the last line, Sikowitz saw something in his student's acting that he had never seen before, something she had always struggled conveying on stage - sorrow.
Tori returned to her locker for a few things after she was done practicing with Sikowitz. She nearly jumped out of her skin when a soft "hey" greeted her. Once Tori's eyes met Jade's, she finally sighed with relief.
"Hi!" Tori exhaled, closing her locker and giving Jade her full attention. "Why are you still here?"
The other inched closer. "I wanted to talk to you. It couldn't really wait until rehearsal tonight."
Tori watched Jade fumbling with her hands and struggling to make eye contact. "Oh, are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," the blue-eyed girl sighed. "Cat talked me down."
"Oh, good," Tori replied, wishing she was the one who could help Jade through a situation. "I'm really sorry if I-"
"Again, it really isn't your fault. I just still have some emotions involving Beck I need to work out. I'm one hundred percent over him, but not some of the things he did to me, if that makes sense."
The brunette nodded, attempting to not give away the fact that she had new knowledge of her relationship with Beck. "It does make sense."
There was an awkward silence as Jade nodded her head a bit. "I was scared you'd hate me again," she finally admitted.
Tori smiled and raised an eyebrow, baffled with how convinced Jade was that she had never liked her. "Again?"
"Yeah, like before-"
"One, there's no 'before' anymore. At least for me. Two, I'm pretty sure I've never hated you."
Jade smirked and looked back up at Tori. Deep down, she knew Tori was right, but it horrified her to admit it. "And you're crazy if that's true."
"Well, I'll have to get back to you. I'm still working on my research," Tori teased with a wink at the end of her sentence. Jade was sure she could faint. Don't fucking wink at me, you bitch.
The dark-haired girl looked to her feet. "So, you don't think I'm like… a crazy bitch?"
"Of course not," Tori responded, shortly after feeling the truth come out. She pressed her lips together and squinted an eye, "But, Andre told me some stuff-"
"Fuckin' Andre," Jade threw her hands in the air in frustration.
"No, it's okay! It was just… stuff involving me, and us… and Beck. Like the whole Platinum Awards thing. That night."
Jade's blue eyes glistened. It was relieving to hear Tori initiate an old memory for a change. "What did he say?"
"How I rejected him. And I did it because of you."
Tori couldn't make sense of how Jade could see anything else from Tori other than admiration. Even from the stories she had been told, Tori just had this feeling like Jade was incredibly special to her. Like the friendship, they had created was so special because it wasn't always perfect or even really a friendship. They had worked through so many problems, and they were still by each other's side.
Jade felt her jaw tense as she refrained from crying. "You did."
Jade still remembered how it felt to hear Tori say those words, 'I can't do that to a friend.' She could have said 'No, I can't. Jade would kill me and make my life miserable,' but she didn't. She was genuinely concerned with Jade's emotions surrounding the potential situation. She was more focused on preventing Jade's feelings from getting hurt rather than her own.
"That's when we became full-fledged friends, isn't' it? Like all of the weird frenemy stuff was over, right?"
"For the most part," Jade smirked, pressing her back into the locker next to Tori.
Tori watched the way the other girl lifted her chin and sighed. Her eyes were on Jade's neck again as she licked her lips before speaking. "Okay, then that's what we are. Full-fledged friends. Nothing else matters to me, no stories or anything, and certainly not one tiny situation with your ex-boyfriend. Your feelings are incredibly valid toward him right now.
Valid. That's not a word I hear associated with me often.
Nervous about Jade's lack of response, Tori continued. "And just so you know, Beck's question instantly made me nauseous. I wasn't even flattered or happy that he offered. It's kind of creepy."
"No kidding," Jade finally broke her inner dialogue. Too soon, you know?" She scoffed, making Tori smile with relief back at her.
"I get he was trying to be nice, but I totally see where you were coming from with what you said."
Jade smiled at Tori as she stood upright again to get one last look at her before she walked away. She wore her aunt's feather earrings today, pink and white-colored. "Okay, good. Alright, I gotta run home before practice tonight, so I'll see you then?"
Do we hug now? Please, I want to hug Jade every chance I get. Don't initiate, that's so weird. "Yeah, see you later," Tori responded through a sigh and remaining stiff in place.
Of course, Beck had the most time with reading in rehearsal later that night. Tori studied his every move, his demeanor, attitude, facial expressions. She couldn't shake this bad image of him from her head. She tried not to see the worst in him, but that was incredibly hard after today. He's not bad, she supposed. Tori didn't want to hurt anyone who could upset Jade the way he did.
Jade was surprisingly secure, sitting next to Tori rather than her ex-boyfriend through those few hours. The former couple didn't say a word to each other all night, but it wasn't tense and Jade wasn't bothered by it. She slouched in her chair for most of the rehearsal, and Tori of course was doing quite the opposite. She wanted to absorb every direction and every word of feedback and could hardly even acknowledge the fact that Jade was so close next to her.
A few times, Jade would look up at Tori just to see her in focus. Her adorable slightly pouted lip, her scowl when she's deep in thought, it was cute.
"He just said stage right, didn't he? So, why are they on the left?"
Jade remembered when Tori was new at Hollywood Arts, and asked all these similar questions about very basic theatre-related things. She remembered mocking her to no end, just because she was new. The natural talent thing was never anything to be jealous of, Jade learned the hard way. Tori was the perfect combination of confident, yet humble. All she ever needed was to learn. It wasn't her fault she was accepted into Hollywood Arts a year after the friend group.
"The stage directions are according to the people actually on the stage. So he's on the right side of the state from his point of view. Weird, I know."
Tori shook her head. "Wild."
Jade softly laughed and adjusted in her seat once her spine was about to crack in half. "Geez, how long have I been sitting like this? My neck is fucked."
The other honestly had no clue. "Couldn't tell you. I don't even know my right from my left."
"Oh stop," the fair-skinned girl bumped Tori's elbow with her own. She wanted to lean her head on Tori's shoulder. It was right there, her neck was truly in a lot of pain, and part of her almost thought that Tori might like it.
If anyone else was here… if Robbie was here, if Cat was here, if Andre was here… I think the entire universe would implode. No one would ever let me down from doing this. No one would ever stop reminding me about the time I leaned on Tori Vega's shoulder.
Did I ever even lean on Beck's shoulder in public? Probably a grand total of one time. Fuck you, Jade. Fuck your feelings.
"Hey, Tori?"
"Hmm?"
Jade hoped she wouldn't regret this moment forever. "How horrified would you be if I asked to lean on your shoulder?"
Tori's mind went fuzzy for a moment, she had been wanting to be this close to Jade since the first time they hugged. She felt wanted, needed. It was something Tori always craved, but never nearly as much as she did specifically with Jade. "I wouldn't be, at all."
The nausea came back, but Jade almost found comfort in it this time. At least she was feeling something other than pain. She'd rather feel this, so excited that she was almost sick from it. She felt alive, and better yet, Tori was alive. Tori felt as Jade's soft hair brushed down her arm, sending a shiver through every inch of her body. Once she regulated her own breathing, she lightly rested her head on top of Jade's, and something in the universe shifted. Something just felt right for the first time in what seemed like forever since Tori woke up in the hospital.