It was involuntary; Tori knew exactly when to stand, when to kneel, when to sit in the pew between her parents. Holly and David had always squeezed Tori and Trina between them during church when they were kids, and Tori was experiencing that same uncomfortable shoulder-to-shoulder feeling today.
An almost deadly accident would bring most occasional churchgoers back for some time. Tori understood the guilt Holly felt upon realizing she hadn't been in so long. You think, "I can't go this week, I want to just relax and stay home on Sunday," and then that week turns into another week, and a month, and a year, and a few years. They had always gone for Christmas and Easter, but the Vega household quickly lost their Sunday routine once David got his new job and Holly's Sundays were dedicated to chores and errands.
Tori recognized a few old faces. Literal, old faces. There were always those few old couples who seemed to be in the same pew every time she went to church. She always wondered what it's like to be that dedicated to something she was almost positive was fictional for so long. Even when they're old and grey, and it takes them much more time to move around and get dressed and ready and arrive in their seats on time, they're still there. She didn't think she would ever fit that definition of a churchgoer, and she wasn't sure she even wanted to be one after she moved out.
Holly left it up to Tori to go, or at least she thought she did. Nothing could make Tori cave more easily than the words, "It would mean a lot to me if you came." She couldn't deny her mother of that, the woman who almost lost one of her daughters three weeks ago. She could sit aside the stained glass windows for an hour just so her mom could maybe take a single full breath for the first time since the accident.
The cantor was horrible, of course. After hearing natural talent left and right at her new school, Tori almost found it difficult to not react to the screechy singing. Tori was horrified by the potential consequences of her mom seeing a single trace of disrespect, so she bit her tongue.
Tori had asked before church if she was confirmed during her sophomore year and was incredibly relieved to find out that she was not. They couldn't find the time for Trina or Tori to make it to all the required sessions and classes to complete the process, so they didn't bother. She liked it better this way. She knew damn well that church had never been too important to her, not to say that faith isn't incredibly important to some people, but it just never resonated with her. 'God' was a word that was impossible to understand.
The thoughts grew darker in Tori's mind. What if I did die? Would I have met God? Would I have watched my family suffer the rest of their lives without me? What would have happened to everyone in my family? What if my parents fought and tried blaming each other and split apart? What would Trina have done then? What about my friends?
Every mass Tori had attended seemed to be about death. Either that or she greatly misunderstood all of the homilies from all the Priests she had heard in her life. She was being told how to live her life now so that there was no Hell in her afterlife, but Tori didn't even believe in Hell. There was such emphasis on death and so many rules on living. So many people with real struggles to be frowned upon just because a book that had been translated and rewritten several times said one sentence that got perceived a certain way in the last few decades. And I'm supposed to just ask and pray for forgiveness when I've been an absolute ass? None of it made sense, and at times Tori was afraid that in itself made her an ass.
It was no secret that most of the people at church knew the Vega family and what had happened. When Holly and David walked with their daughter down the aisle for communion, Tori felt dozens of pairs of eyes burning through her skin.
And Tori thought, every time I'm in a church, it feels like I'm going to burst into flames.
Jade already looked like herself again, Lane noticed immediately. She didn't offer a smile or anything, but she wasn't as sluggish or fixated on the ground once she sat down.
"How's everything going?"
"Good," she replied flatly while crossing her arms. "How are you?"
Lane wasn't sure how to follow up; Jade was never the type of person to ask that back out of common courtesy or just by default. "Um, I'm good. I'm pretty good."
Jade nodded, keeping her mouth shut and staring back at Lane. She was waiting for him to begin while he was waiting for her to try and steer the conversation a different way like she normally does. Once he noticed she in fact was ready to begin a real conversation, he cleared his throat. "You seemed really nervous about your friendship with Tori last time we spoke, how is that going?"
"Good," Jade repeated.
He raised an eyebrow. "Um, what's new with that?"
"We've seen each other a little. It's been nice."
He leaned back in his chair. "What's this I hear about you and Beck?"
Jade was no longer apathetic to the conversation. "How did you hear about that?"
"Sikowitz noticed something was wrong with Tori the other day and pulled it out of her."
She snapped her fingers and looked to the side. "Damn, Sikowitz."
"Excuse me?" Lane spoke more sharply.
"Sorry, sorry," Jane muttered, shaking it off. "Well, if you're going to lecture me about it, you'll be happy to know that I already talked it out with Tori. We're okay now, honestly."
Lane wanted to believe her, but it was incredibly difficult knowing Jade's history of 'resolving problems.' He clasped his hands together nervously. "What did happen with Beck?"
Jade sighed dramatically, knowing she hadn't exhaled once since entering the room. "The prome came up, and he offered to take Tori as a friend so guys weren't all over her."
"Were you jealous of her?"
Lane didn't even pause to consider the situation. How could he not understand immediately that flirting with Tori this soon is disgusting?
"No, I'd never be jealous over a guy hitting on me on my second day back to school after almost dying," her voice was drenched with sarcasm, but Lane wasn't one to comment as he now realized the situation.
"I see. That makes sense that you would feel uncomfortable about that-"
"And before you ask, I don't have feelings for Beck anymore. That's long gone."
"Okay," Lane attempted to shift gears, but Jade went on.
"It's just kind of disgusting because like, the night of the Laramie auditions he kissed me, and I wasn't into that, and I kind of guess that he just read the mood wrong. We had been hanging out a little more and getting comfortable with each other then… but when he kissed me it was disgusting. I immediately said we can only be friends, that's all I want. I know I didn't want him to do that, but what I don't understand is how he can do that, then turn around in a few weeks and be moving in on Tori? We have two years of history behind us, and it pisses me off so much, you know? Like, what if I had decided I wanted Beck back? Am I really that temporary and unimportant that when I reject him he can just move on that quickly?"
Nausea struck again. Jade grabbed a pillow beside her on the couch and hugged it tightly to her churning stomach. Lane watched as she closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, as if he wasn't even there. She deliberately noticed her emotions rising to an alarming level, and did something to calm down that didn't involve lashing out or violence. Wow.
"Jade, I want you to know that I think you're remarkable."
She chortled. "Wow, thanks. It's been my dream to hear that from a guidance counselor all my life."
Lane chuckled. "I think you're remarkable because one, you just showed a side of yourself to me that I knew existed, but it was hidden so far down underneath all of your walls and insecurities. I mean, you told me all of that. Have you talked to anybody else about those feelings?"
Jade hated what she was hearing, but she knew it was true. Lane was the only person who Jade could talk to without them questioning her feelings for Tori, or at least that's how it felt. "Yeah, I talked to Cat about it a little."
"Oh good," he beamed. "I think it is completely understandable that you'd feel replaceable due to Becks' actions. And even though you don't have feelings anymore, it still doesn't feel great. Seeing your ex move on to someone new is always a weird feeling, especially when you and him were kind of on and off again. As for feeling replaceable, trust me when I say that you're one of a kind."
"I know," Jade replied confidently as if she hadn't been worried about that exact feeling the whole time.
Lane raised an eyebrow. "So, how'd Tori handle it?"
"She doesn't even want to go, let alone with him," Jade sighed, clasping her hands together.
The other frowned. "Well, that's too bad. It would have been nice to see her having fun."
"Proms are loud and obnoxious, she'd probably get a headache and probably feel really sad seeing everyone living normal teenage lives without the burden of memory loss."
Jade's blunt comment shocked Lane, but he couldn't deny any of those speculations. "Okay, fair."
"But anyway, she denied him. I haven't talked to him since."
"Do you want to?"
"No," she said quietly. She knew she should, but she can't. "I don't need him in my life anymore."
Lane was impressed. "Good for you. You don't need anyone but yourself."
"But I need Tori-"
Lane's eyes bulged out of his head and Jade immediately knew she had fucked up.
I knew it! I knew it! I so knew it! Don't smile. Don't let her see your excitement.
She could practically hear Lane's screaming mind from across the room as if his face didn't already give it away. She was on her feet and fumbling out the door clumsily before he had time to say a single word.
Lane froze in his seat and remembered seeing Jade leaning on Tori's shoulder in rehearsal last week. I was right this whole time! Sikowitz owes me five bucks! He looked back down to his notepad that was blank. He wished Jade hadn't run out so quickly, that was even more indicative that she was running away from her feelings, literally.
Suddenly, Jade burst through the door again and Lane jumped out of his skin. Her voice was low and sinister as her eyes pierced through him. "If you say a single word of this to anybody until I'm ready to talk to you about it, I will never trust you again."
"You can trust me. You have my word," he replied while trembling in his chair.
Jade gave him one last glare before slamming the door on her way out.
The grocery store was always an oddly disorienting place for Tori. There was never a phase of life when you grew out of practice from grocery shopping. You always had to go back for more. It never became a memory, it was simply routine.
It was like she had never heard sound before; the whirring of the machines near the registers, all of the beeping sounds from items being scanned, the rustling of plastic bags, other carts being pushed, and people talking loudly over the counter to place an order. It might have been somewhat relieving for Tori to do a regular life event, but it was anything but relaxing. A wheel on the cart Holly was pushing wouldn't stop screeching and the sound against Tori's eardrums replicated nails on a chalkboard but at absolute full volume. It wasn't until Holly stopped to ask about yet another favorite food of Tori's and if it sounded good. "I could make some ziti tonight?"
"I don't care," Tori said, holding back tears.
Holly knows that weak voice and what it signifies. "What's wrong, Tori?"
She felt absolutely pathetic. Oh, nothing I just cannot stand the sound of the wheel squeaking. I literally might explode over a tiny little squeaking sound because it makes me want to rip the hair out of my scalp and I am physically pained by it. "I'm just… feeling a little uneasy."
Holly looked around to see if anyone was nearby. "Why, sweetie?"
She continued walking down the aisle. "Can we please just get everything we need and leave?"
The mother watched her daughter continue down the aisle at a slow pace, scuffing her feet along the way and failing to look at anything on the shelves. Tori usually loves food, and grocery shopping, but I guess that's gone. I wonder what's gotten into her?
She caught up to Tori, keeping quiet and deciding not to pry any further on her negative feelings. "Okay, I've decided that I'll make some of that pasta salad you like, and dad will be home and he can throw those spiedies on the grill."
"Sure," Tori sighed, already feeling more relieved now that a decision was made. Maybe it meant they could leave the store sooner.
A new song began playing on the speaker. Tori recognized it, knowing she had heard it when she was in middle school. One of those overplayed songs that comes back to haunt you whenever you're in a store.
" Head underwater, and you tell me to breathe easy for a while…"
Holly was singing quietly to herself, and Tori's cheeks immediately flushed. "Mom, stop. "
"Breathing gets harder, even I know that…"
Holly wasn't tone-deaf, but she definitely didn't know how to sing well. Even when she was stone-cold sober, somehow she always sounded like she was wasted at a karaoke bar when she was singing. Once Tori realized the song, she could begin to piece lyrics together from her memory, though it felt like she had only remembered it as well as something that could have happened a hundred years ago.
The squeaking wheel noise faded out of mind. "Blank stares at blank pages, no easy way to say this…"
Now Tori was singing along, and Holly started moving her body to the beat while pushing the cart. Tori mimicked the way Holly's hips swayed as they turned the corner into a new aisle, luckily with no people to see the next bit.
" You mean well, but you make this hard on me, I'm not gonna write you a love song…"
Holly was less bashful than Tori, and that was saying a lot. Usually, Holly yells at Trina and Tori for making every grocery trip a private concert for themselves, dancing all along the aisle and picking up items to use as microphones or instruments. Holly didn't mind singing and dancing to get Tori's mind off of whatever was clouding it. Plus, a few people nearby had laughed at the spontaneous outburst of joy and cheesy dancing,
Most importantly, Holly was relieved to know that Tori could still tap into her goofy side once prompted. She's still my Tori.
"You ready?" Andre's hand was hovering over his mousepad. He had been dying to hear Tori sing this song again since they had started working on it. The teacher didn't have deadlines for Tori anymore, he just required her to get everything out of the class that she could. Of course, Andre was going to bring the best out of her and encourage her to write about anything and everything.
Tori looked up while adjusting the giant padded headphones over her ears. "No, these things hurt!"
Andre chuckled. "They're studio monitors, they make everything sound awesome so you can really get into the music while you sing."
I'm really not ready for this. I'm anything but ready for this. I feel awkward and out of place. This song isn't really mine.
"Alright, might as well get this over with," Tori exhaled, shifting her posture a bit.
The introduction played for the track while her eyes fixated on the red illuminated light above the door. How many times have I recorded in this room? These walls know more about me than I do.
" I would've never predicted this
I've never been happier to be wrong
You tried to tell me to give it up
But I've known what you needed all along"
Tori noticed Andre shift in his chair, but couldn't make eye contact with him. She couldn't stand the thought of him stopping the track to tell her she sounded horrible. While he immediately shifted in his chair, he didn't interrupt the recording, which Tori took as a good sign.
"You try to hide from everyone
But I've seen you without your armor
I've watched you grow and screamed your name at every show
Maybe it's time you know"
Andre had listened to the demo of this song a million times over it seemed. The last recording of Tori Vega singing before the accident that existed. He was bewildered at how different Tori sounded, good different. Not that how she was before was bad, because anyone could see that it was anything but bad, but this was a new Tori. This was a sorrowful Tori, and the desperation for Jade was somehow even more convincing now than before, and she doesn't even know it's there yet.
"... You're like a fever, but I can't break it
I can't break the way I burn for you"
During the instrumental break after the chorus, Tori finally looked up at Andre who stared back into her eyes like she was the entire universe. She felt a thrilling rush through her blood at the realization she was doing something right. And even she was beginning to feel it, this song is me. I might as well try owning it.
"I won't say that I'm the better guy
But at least I'd be the last to make you cry
I'd heal every scar and walk with you
Through the darkest nights of your life
The more Tori repeated 'It doesn't matter who the song is about' in her mind, the less she believed it.
"If it was up to me
You'd feel anything but temporary…"
If there really was a person this song was intended for, Tori wasn't so sure she was confident in the whole 'making somebody else feel anything but temporary' thing given how she is practically strangers with everyone but family again. She lost her energy while singing the final chorus, and couldn't even go for the higher riffs they had written. She had tried them over and over again with Andre and somehow didn't feel quite comfortable yet. Though, she was still willing to try during practice, but not this time.
Her friend pulled his headphones off and his voice sounded on the speaker in the recording booth. "You okay?"
Tori shook her head. "I mean, yeah. But no," she laughed, regretting the fact that she was holding back tears.
"You were doing great," he replied, waiting for the reason why she broke down.
"I know, and it was cool. I'm kind of happy crying, but I'm also sad crying because this is just really weird, even still," her voice shrunk into the tiniest high pitch sound Andre had ever heard out of her as she finally began to cry. He put the headphones down and immediately ran into the booth.
"It's okay, it's okay, come here," he hummed as he wrapped his arms around her. He gave great hugs, not too tight but incredibly sincere. He wasn't afraid to let it last a while, either. She lightly rocked back and forth as a way to say thank you, and let go while she wiped the tears from her eyes.
"We need to write something new."
Andre's eyes lit up again. "Oh! Um, what were you thinking?"
"I have no idea, I just can't do this one anymore. I don't know why, it feels wrong somehow. Well, not wrong, it's just too much-"
"Tori," Andre took a deep breath. "One time we had a conversation a long time ago about how I can't hold my emotions inside. I physically cannot keep a giant personal feeling or emotion a secret, or else I go crazy. Like I can't sleep, eat, or do anything until I get that off my chest."
Tori listened intently but grew nervous about what direction this was going in. Andre took a pause to be sure to word this next part carefully.
"I don't know who or what your song is about," he lied, "but if you perform it, I think it will feel like a finished story. Sometimes mysteries in songs can be a good thing!"
She wasn't interested in coming up with an elaborate emotional process for a song she wrote before losing two years of her memory. She just wanted to know, and her best friend should know these kinds of things. "I just need to know where it came from, and what it is. Like Jesus, Andre, clearly I was completely in love with someone. And really, you don't know?"
The alarms in Andre's mind were blaring now as his mouth went dry. "Tori, I promise you. If you perform this song, I bet you'll find out really quickly who it's about-"
"What, someone's just going to pop out of the audience and say 'Hey, I know this is about me! I'm the one you're crazy about!" She threw her hands in the air.
Andre either had to tell Jade or Tori about what's going on really quickly and it sure as hell wasn't going to be Tori. "Well, I don't know for sure, but you might as well try. Who knows what you told anybody else about it. You could've told anyone else about it. Maybe it was someone I once liked or something, and you were too scared to tell me!"
"But you're… you're a guy?"
Fuck, look what you've gotten yourself in now. Andre nodded slowly and stood on his toes. "Mhm."
"So… are you, g-"
"No! No, I'm uh… I'm bi," he squinted when he finished the sentence.
Tori's cheeks flushed. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you say something you weren't ready to yet-"
"No, no, it's okay-" he laughed nervously. "I don't mind. It's cool."
"No seriously, I'm really more than okay with it, I do not care at all."
"Well I sure hope not, you go to an Arts school," Andre laughed again as if there wasn't a growing argument taking place.
Tori sighed exasperatedly once again. "I'm sorry Andre, but none of this makes sense. I just want it to go away, like I will never find out what it is. I know you're hiding something," Tori turned away and started gathering her things.
Andre was desperate to make sure Tori didn't find anything out too soon. What if she goes to Jade? And Jade comes to me asking questions? "Tori, you were too afraid to tell me who it was!"
This was the first time Andre had told a significant lie to Tori, and it tore his heart in half. She stopped in her tracks just as she was about to exit the room. She glanced at the floor for a moment, finally turning around once she realized Andre was probably trying to protect something about her past. "So, I was … there was someone?"
Andre nodded. He couldn't keep still or hardly look Tori in the eyes.
Her anger was bubbling up, but she didn't want to be mad at Andre. She just wanted the truth. "But you can't tell me, because you don't know who?"
"No, I don't."
"Great, thanks," Tori turned and left the room leaving a panicked Andre behind as he practically gasped for air.
Today, 11:46 AM
so, Andre just told me something interesting. he's also lying to me, so I'm just going to say it because I'm mad. did you know he's bi?
Jade snorted loud enough to silence the history teacher's lecture. What the fuck is he miserably failing to hide now? As she began typing out an answer, the teacher groaned. "Jade, please put your phone away-"
"Gotta go, sorry-" she mumbled while standing up with her bag.
The janitor's closet was creepy alone, but it was the only place Tori knew where to hide while she was skipping a class. It wasn't long before Jade burst through the door with laughter. Tori would have laughed too, but her heart was beating out of her chest and her anger persisted.
"I'm sorry, Andre told you he's into dudes ?"
"Yeah, I mean, now I feel kind of bad because maybe he wasn't out yet-"
"Eh, I don't really think anyone at this school is straight," Jade chuckled while folding her arms. She knew Andre was lying about his identity and only used it to cover whatever lie he was telling.
Fuck, wait, no I can't joke about that she doesn't know anyone yet-
"...Anyone?" Tori raised an eyebrow. A small smile appeared on her face as Jade's amusement turned into worry.
Really? This is how I'm going to tell her? Fuck you, Andre. "Alright, fine. I'm bi, too. You happy?"
I mean… yeah, I'm absolutely okay with that, of course. "Wait, wait, wait. So did I know this about you before?"
Jade nodded slowly. "You sure did." That low tone sent shivers down Tori's spine every time. Jade probably would have minded coming out this way a lot more if it was truly Tori's first time knowing, but it wasn't. Something about it made her less nervous this time around, especially with how excited Tori seemed about the news.
She fumbled with her hands a bit as she could feel Jade's eyes burning through her while she waited for a response. "I was kind of wondering about a few people… Who else?"
Without hesitation, Jade went on. "Robbie is a raging homosexual in disguise, though it's a very poor disguise. Cat loves everybody, I'm into men and women who I would let step on me."
Tori blinked. "Let… step on you?"
"Yeah, you know. Like, 'ahhh I'd let them step on me, please hit me with a bus,' type of thing."
Turns out, this was a way more amusing way to come out than the first time around for Jade.
Okay, so first, no one is straight except for me apparently, and two, attraction equals wanting to be severely hurt? "You know Jade, you kind of lost me on that one."
Jade could easily use humor to disguise a panic attack, it was actually incredibly easy at this point since she has had years of practice. But there was a bigger question here, why would Andre of all people lie to Tori?
"Well, I tried my best. Wait, so what makes you think Andre is lying about something?"
Tori brushed the hair out of her face and took a deep breath. "Remember that song that we talked about last week?"
"Yup."
"Okay well, then, he said he didn't know who it was about. Now, he's saying that it's definitely about someone, and if he's my best friend then how would he not know? It doesn't make sense to me."
Jade nodded a bit. "Okay, what else?"
"And then he tried telling me to perform it as if singing it doesn't make my throat close up and cause me to cry. I can't do it, Jade. I can't sing that song. It does this thing to me like I can't breathe-"
"Whoa, whoa," she started, bringing Tori down a bit. "What happened to not caring about what it meant before?"
Tori felt guilty not having stuck to Jade's advice, but it was impossible to. "I tried, until I sang it again, and again, and again. I mean, it's the only running song I had left that hadn't already been an assignment, and I don't know anything new to write about. How about the fact that noises in the grocery store made me anxious last night? That'll be a hit," Tori sighed and buried her face in her hands.
"I hate to say it, but I agree with Andre. This thing won't be behind you until you just perform it and get the grade. And until then, just think of it as a cover."
Tori's face relaxed a bit as she lifted her head. "That's not a bad idea, but I already know that I wrote it, so it's hard to separate-"
"No, I wrote it."
Tori scowled. "Wait, you did?"
"No," Jade smirked, "But that's what we can pretend, okay?"
The brunette crossed her arms. "If this works, I'm going to be so mad at you."
"No, you'll thank me, of course," Jade corrected with a cheesy grin. "Also, I know Andre's your best friend, but I don't really think you'd talk to him about whoever you were into."
Hearing those words come out of her own mouth put a knife through Jade's heart. Whoever you were into, and maybe it was Beck because you flew out of the room when he kissed me, and then you got hit by a car.
Tori's anger diminished as she repeated those words in her head. "You don't?"
"Nah," Jade waved her hand. "You usually tell Cat those things."
"Not you?" Tori frowned.
Jade cackled. "I want you to think about what I could have done if I was feeling mean that day if I found out who you had a crush on."
Tori nodded her head vigorously. "Oh, right, right. Okay, then I'll ask Cat!"
Tori let Cat read the lyrics to the song, Jade's song. She smiled through every paragraph, making small noises of delight at certain parts.
"Tori, this is so sweet!"
"I didn't write it, Jade did," Tori explained awkwardly, attempting to use the strange coping strategy.
Her friend frowned. "But you said it's your-"
"It's Jade's. Just go with it, there's a whole story but it doesn't matter. So, do you know who it's about?"
Cat looked around confused, wondering who Tori was asking something she didn't have an answer for. "Wait, me?"
"Yes, you! You'd know who I had a crush on, right?"
"I don't know, Tori. Sometimes you can be pretty private about who you're into-"
" UGH!" Tori's back slammed into her locker as she slid down to sit on the floor. "This is so stupid! It doesn't matter, Jade's right."
The redhead frowned, feeling sorry that she couldn't make Tori happy or relieved with this situation. "So, now what?"
Tori glanced to the ceiling. "Beck's out of the question, and I wouldn't trust Robbie to hold a pencil for me without finding a way to destroy it."
The other giggled and sat down on the floor with Tori. "Well, whoever it's about, I'm sure they would have been thrilled to know."
As much as those words made Tori want to cry all over again, they were appreciated. Cat leaned on Tori's shoulder and sighed, and Tori pulled out her phone to text Andre.
Today, 2:57 PM
hey, I'm sorry I freaked out
It's okay, I know this stuff must be really hard for you. Are we cool?
yeah, Jade made a good point. as close as we might be, girls don't really tell guys about their crushes, right?
Andre's stomach twisted as he typed out another lie.
Right. Don't sweat it about today, I just want you to be okay.
I am. and I'll perform the song.
The last time Trina hugged Tori this tight was probably when they were six years old. Trina used to give these excruciatingly powerful hugs until she had to be scolded over and over again about how hugs aren't meant to be too strong, just a nice gentle embrace. Trina never really understood the word "gentle" since.
"So what do you want to do this weekend? We could go shopping, and hit on cute boys at the mall so they can get us into a movie for free with them!"
Tori sighed. "I'd rather not encourage strangers to take me into a dark room, but thanks for the offer!"
"Well, we have to do something! When's the last time you've done something actually fun?"
The younger sister glanced to the ground for a moment to think. "Um, I mean last weekend Cat, Jade, and I had a sleepover here-"
"Who?!" Trina shrieked.
Tori repeated herself hesitantly. "Cat and Jade, why are you freaked out?"
"How uncomfortable was mom about that one?" The older one winced.
How would she know that? "She didn't love Jade staying over, what's the big deal with that anyway?"
Trina sat on the couch and patted the cushion next to her to initiate what seemed to be a serious talk. Tori's heart began pounding as she fixed her eyes on Trina's.
"Like, two years ago, Jade stole one of Dad's hockey trophies at a sleepover."
Trina wasn't expecting the other to smile or laugh fondly at this, but Tori couldn't help but envision the entire thing and what stress that would have caused her dad. "How'd they find out it was her?"
"She admitted it! And sold it online for money! She claimed it was some famous hockey player's trophies from when he was a kid!"
Wow, she really is incredibly creative and sneaky. "Okay, that's genius though-"
"Tori! She stole from us and made money!"
"I'm not saying it's good, but it's really smart."
Trina grunted. "Clearly mom didn't tell you that bit-"
"Nope," Tori made a popping noise with her lips as she crossed her legs and placed her hands on her knees. "Jade and I are good friends. I know she used to be mean but-"
"No, Tori. She is evil!"
"That's ridiculous-"
"Her favorite movie is literally about someone who murders her friends with a pair of scissors!"
Tori snapped her head in Trina's direction again as her eyes lit up. "The Scissoring?"
At this point, Trina was creeped out and seriously questioning Tori's judgment. "What, did she make you watch it or something since you two are so close now?"
"No," Tori laughed and looked to her feet again. "I really like her."
No. No, no, no. Not again, Trina thought. The crush her little sister had on Jade was pathetically obvious before the accident, and now it's only been a few weeks and we're right back to that again? "Really, you do?"
"Yeah! I mean, she's been really nice to me. Always leaves class to help me through a hard situation or if I'm feeling overwhelmed and don't know how to handle stuff at school, she keeps telling me things like how incredible I am and how good of a singer I am-"
"She probably feels guilty that she was such a raging bitch to you before, and doesn't want to be painted as the bad guy by the rest of the school. Well, at least she's making up for it," Trina shrugged. If she suggested that Tori might have some specific feelings about Jade, she'd probably make the problem exponentially worse. It was never something Trina actually asked Tori about before, she just assumed given how they constantly bickered, played couples in plays at school, were assigned to go on 'fake dates' and so on, not to mention Tori's obsession with Katy Perry.
Tori stared off again and shook her head slightly. "If I remembered, I'm sure I'd feel different. I like that Jade and I get to start over. Clearly, this situation brought out something in her that I think she has needed for a long time. She's vulnerable but warm. Open and honest, and it seems she had struggled with those things before."
God, how much more mushy and disgusting can this get? "Well, I'd love to sit and chat about Jade more, but we could be eating frozen yogurt on the beach right now."
Tori's face lit up as she jumped from the couch. "Why didn't you just say that before? Let's go!"