A/N: I'm back! Again.. wrote two chapters today. .one for this story.. and one for Wrecking the wedding.. yay me.. now my shoulders hurt.. probably not sitting right or something.. ah well..

Alori: I'm trying to keep it up ;) but work has to be done too.. blast that whole system of money and food and stuff… right.. thanks for your review though :D Oh.. and let me know if I got the MS right ;)

Nicole: What happens next? Dunno.. won't know 'till I write some more I guess. And of course some Mary Sue parody ;)

Disclaimer: Do not own POTC.. do not own Jasper.. but he still is mine.. mine.. mine I tell you! –shields boyfriend from obsessive fan girls.. who don't exist-

Chapter 9: Mary Sue setback.

Lona's POV:
-Sitting on table- And now we wait.. wait.. and wait.. and for what? For Norrie to come up with some marvellous idea.. so far he hasn't come up with anything good.. except for: let's stay away from the soldiers..

Brilliant plan, Einstein.. pssh
"Oh Jamey?" -using singsong voice-
"No"
"Jaaaaamesy?"
"No!"
"Norrie?"
"WHAT!"
"What's ya doing?" I ask him, while swinging my legs.
"Thinking of some great escape plan"
"Oh"

A few minutes we both stay very quiet
"James?"
"No"
"Did you think of something yet?"
"No"
"Why not?"
"Because.. well.. escaping is not that simple!" Norrington's head turns scarlet and he's trying to avoid my stare as much as possible.
A bit puzzled I look around the tiny room we're hiding in..

"It's not?"
"No it's not"
"But.."
"No!"
-sigh- Fine.. whatever you wish. I jump from the table and walk towards the door.
Very carefully I put my head around the corner and look outside. Left.. everything empty.. right.. everything empty, straight ahead.. an empty street.. nope.. no one's here.

"Nozzer?"
"No"
-sigh-
"I'm going outside.. I'm bored.. and I want my boyfriend.. and I need a new dress.. this one is way too pink" (A/N ok.. pink dresses.. for more info I'd suggest you go and read Dream on.. or Ship Ahoy)
"You what? Wait! No!"
Without waiting.. naturally.. I step outside in the fresh air, the warm sun shining on my back..

I stretch my limbs a little and jump up and down to loosen up my muscles.
"Norrie.. won't you come out and play?" I tease.
Grumbling and muttering Norrington leaves the safety of the little guards house.
Smiling I pat him on the head
"You see...no big bad monsters around"
James slaps my hand away and scowls at me
"Stop that"
I simply shrug and start walking in some random direction.
"Where are you going?"
"Anywhere"
"But you don't even know where that is"
Stopping dead in my tracks I turn around and regard Norrington.
"You have got absolutely no idea how silly that sounded did you?"
His face is turning crimson again.. really cute actually.. he looks like a little gnome.. you know? White beard.. Red hat? Only.. upside down.. with the wig being the beard..

"Well.. yes.. but.. surely.. you don't know your way in this town.. and they're searching for us.."
"So? It's not as if that's bothering me.. all I want to do is go home.. kick Jack back here.. and hold my boyfriend really tight for a really long time"
"At least let me escort you out of here"

Aww.. how sweet.. he just pretended he didn't like me.
"And here I was.. thinking you hated me.. you softie you"
"I still loathe you.. I'm just making sure you're gone"
How sweet.. I'd wish he'd drop into a random hole or something. Grr..

We walk into a alley.. a dark, abandoned alley.. a dark.. abandoned.. thug infested alley.. thus making the alley not so abandoned.
Norrington is forcing me to walk on, but quite frankly.. I don't wanna.
"James.. I don't think this is such a good idea.. I mean.. evil bad guys.. knifes.. guns.. that sort of things.."
"Nonsense.. this is the shortest way to the docks.. that is how you got home last time, isn't it?"
"Yes.. but"
"G'day mate"
G'day? We're in Australia now? I take a little peek around Norrington's shoulders and see a scruffy tiny man blocking our way through.
"Good afternoon sir.. If you would please step out of our way.."
One tiny scruffy guy? Not good.. not good at all.. I look back.. and give a little yelp.. desperate I start tugging on Norrington's coat.
"James.."
"Not now"
"James.."
"Not now I said!"
"James I think you really should.."
"What is it!"
James spins around.. and sees the group of thugs, casually leaning against the wall.. cleaning their fingernails with the point of their knifes..
Well.. pretending to be casually leaning.. and attempting to clean..
"Ah.. aha.. Right.. I see what you mean.."
"Great.. and what are you planning on doing about it?"
"Yes.. well.. quite.. I'd suggest.. run"
He grabs my arm again, storms forward, pushing the scruffy tiny fellow aside while bursting through the narrow lane. Unfortunately for us, the mob gains on us rather quickly. And before we could make it to the end of the alley, they've got us pinned against a wall..

The biggest guy holds his knife at Norrie's throat.
"There, there kind sir.. now.. normally we'd say.. yer money or yer life.. but today.. we're having this special offer for ye.. "
"Special offer.. how kind.." Norrington is transpiring heavily, and when he swallows I can see his Adam's apple bouncing up and down nervously.
The scruffy thing at the back of the group is giggling..
"Shut up Measle"
"Yes sir, right away sir"
"As I was saying.. this special offer.. it consists of us.. taking your money.. your life.. ánd your lass"
His lass?

What!

Me?

"Excuse me? Sir? Sir? I'm not.." -smack-
Ouch.. ow.. ouch..

That hurt.. a big thug just backhanded me across the mouth.. and.. that hurt..

Suddenly a voice speaks up.. a voice all syrupy and sweet.. enough to make you feel very very queasy and sick to the stomach.
"I really wish you haven't done that.. Now I'll have to hurt you"

A few whooshing sounds are heard.. and within the blink of an eye.. all the bad guys are lying on the ground, groaning or being altogether dead.

A young girl, about 19 years old is standing in front of us. She has raven black hair, with purple streaks, that falls in long waves over her shoulders. Her icy blue eyes are looking concerned at me, while she wipes her silver dagger clean on her clothes. She's wearing a white pirate shirt, that seems a bit too tight.. with breeches and knee length, black, pirate boots.. when she moves her head, her large golden earrings make a gentle tinkling sound..

"Are you okay?" she asks, her smile revealing pearly white, perfect teeth. She has a beautiful mouth, with full, slightly pouting lips.

"Yeah, yeah.. I'm fine.. only lost a few teeth and broken my jaw.. now go away!"
"Oh, I'm so relieved.. I was afraid I wasn't here in time.. my name is Mary.. Mary Sue.."

Jasper's POV

It took the pirate a little while.. but he finally managed to get the hint and join us at our table..
He didn't have much to tell us.. except that this guy, named Norrington, has been arrested and sentenced to death.. nothing more.. nothing less.

-sigh- So now we're walking the streets again, sometimes being harassed by women who want to earn some quick money. Some of these proposals are rather.. fleshy..
"No ma'am.. I really am not interested" and that was another one.. a rather unattractive blonde woman..

"Jack.. what are we going to do now? Nobody has even seen Lona"
Jack huffs.. and glares at me
"Lad.. your miss always seems to find a way to work herself in some kind of trouble.."
"Yes I know.. she even manages to bump her head on a closet.."
"Aye.. so I'm willing to bet my Pearl on this.. she's with that good for nothin' Norrington"
"Who is this Norrington everybody keeps telling me about! Am I supposed to know him?"
"Nah.. he's just a nobody.. the former commodore.. but he knows Lona.. and Lona knows him.."
"So? That doesn't automatically mean that.. wait.. is that guy trouble?"

"He is the source of all trouble if you ask me lad""

Yeah.. that would be exactly where Lona is.. in trouble..

10 minutes to 5.. going home soon! I'm going to check out my former chapters tomorrow.. see if I can terminate some spelling errors.. R&R people! I love reviews!