WARNING: EXPLICIT content ahead 😬

Tori hears some hard truths in therapy, there's a slight situation with Cat, but don't worry it gets resolved. Jade and Tori learn a lottt about each other in this chapter.

"So what's been new the last two weeks? Sorry again for missing last week, there was a family emergency that I couldn't make changes around."

Tori pressed the palms of her hands into her jeans down her thighs. "No, no worries. Ummm, a lot is new actually," she laughed, almost hurting her lungs she was so nervous to address all the updates. Dana had said before it can be difficult to navigate a relationship post-traumatic accident, but a therapist might say that at any point in young adult life, Tori hoped.

Dana smiled at Tori's obvious happiness regarding the news. "Oh, awesome! Tell me everything."

The brunette exhaled sharply and closed her eyes for a second. "There's someone."

"Whoa," Dana's eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yeah, I'm gonna need to tell you a lot if I'm honest. Have I talked to you about my friend Jade yet?"

The woman squinted her eyes and hummed for a moment before responding. "A frenemy type person that you were actually getting along great with since the accident?"

Tori's lips pressed together as she nodded stiffly. "Yup."

Dana blinked. "That's… That's the someone?"

Oh, she hates me for this. "Yup."

Tori watched as the other shifted posture, set her notebook down, and gave her full attention. "Alright, let's break this down. Jade's a girl?"

It took every muscle in Tori's body to not roll her eyes. "Yup."

"How long have you known you liked girls?"

Tori attempted to swallow the lump in her throat, but failed. "Um, a little over two weeks?"

"And how long has this thing been going on?"

"Like… a week."

Dana nodded, reminding herself not to stare at the girl for too long that she'd tense up. "And how'd that happen?"

Tori sighed, exhaling through a laugh. "Apparently, I liked her for a long time before the accident. And even after, the way she talked to me, looked at me, would defend me from everything and everyone, all the little things she did to make sure I was okay and comfortable at school… I just knew there was something I felt with her that wasn't just friendship. But anyway, my friend Andre told me that I talked to him shortly before the accident about my feelings for Jade. He believed I had them for a long time, and just didn't realize it, because you know it's never easy to admit you might not be straight when everyone growing up just expects that of everybody-"

"Right, right," Dani added, solely to hint at the fact that she was supportive of Tori's identity.

The younger girl continued. "So, I just kind of just eventually realized it. It hit me all at once. I was singing this song at a karaoke bar and all my friends were there, and for some reason the song just made sense and I was looking at Jade while singing it, and it was fully relatable like I wasn't just singing karaoke. It felt real . So, Andre's my closest friend besides Jade, and he told me the parts about talking to him about Jade before the accident. That's when this song came up, a song that I wrote about Jade."

Dana let out a laugh. "That's so adorable!"

"But wait! I had already been practicing this song with him for a class at school, and it freaked me out because it was clearly a love song and I had no clue who it was about. Well, when I realized I liked Jade, I realized that the song is obviously about her. BUT, I had already agreed to sing it at prom, which was a few weekends ago."

"So your life is just a full-on romance novel by this point," Dana replied. She couldn't help but smile with all of Tori's sharing and excitement. She had never seen her patient so upbeat and full of life.

"Oh, I know. So I performed it, and Jade knew it was about her just by listening to it. There were lyrics in it that I had gotten from a conversation we had over the summer. I guess she was telling me that she's scared of being temporary in everyone's lives, and I was telling her that I wouldn't be. That I really valued her as a friend and didn't want to lose her after graduation."

Dana needed a moment to collect herself, this was by far the cutest romantic thing she had ever heard from a patient. "That's all way too adorable, I'm just… wow."

"I know, me too."

"I can't believe it came back around and still lined up after the accident? If you were frenemies, how bad was it? Was it just playful or?"

Tori bit her lip and smirked. "Sometimes, definitely. Other times, well… Jade can be kind of scary. She definitely did some things that aren't… okay."

Dana's eyes narrowed. "Like what?"

"Oh, you know… spilling coffee on my head on my first day of school at Hollywood Arts."

"Whoa, whoa, back up. Why did she do that?"

"I bumped into her boyfriend by accident and spilled coffee on him."

Dana blinked. "Okay, you lost me."

"It was my first day, I was the new girl. She walked in while I was rubbing coffee off his shirt, it looked a certain way and she didn't like it. So that same day, we were in an improv acting exercise and she decided to dump coffee on me for revenge."

"That still doesn't make it okay to pour-"

"I know, I know. So, a few days later, I got back at her and kissed him. To my understanding, we kind of competed with each other in every aspect possible after that."

"How long ago was the coffee incident?"

"Two years ago," Tori replied simply, still smiling through every sentence she spoke.

Dana was now hesitant with this forming relationship but didn't want to show it just yet. "Okay, and what else?"

"Oh, just a bunch of stupid stuff. Andre says I've always been a good friend to her, and her relationship with her ex-boyfriend brought out the worst in her. She had problems with jealousy and he didn't help her cause at all. I never even really liked him, I think I just kissed him to stand up to her and let her know she can't just push me around."

"Uh-huh… but you've considered her a friend pretty much since then?"

"Yeah, she's always been in the friend group," Tori chirped, folding her hands in her lap. She could tell Dana's suspicions were rising but didn't care.

"Okay, well that took a turn. It seems like the accident might have helped her to realize that who she was as a friend to you before wasn't acceptable. I'm glad you have a relationship that clearly makes you extremely happy."

"Thank you, me too."

"Do your parents know?"

"Yup, she came over for dinner to talk to them about it."

"Oh wow, that's steps past where I thought you might be with it," Dana chuckled. "How are they feeling about it?"

"My mom loves it. My dad has a few problems with Jade but they're working it out. I think it will be okay."

Dana picked up her notebook again and balanced it on her thigh that was crossed over the other. "How are Jade's parents about the relationship, do you know?"

Tori stared at the blank notebook as she answered. "Her mom's cool with it, her dad, absolutely not."

"Oh," the other's tone shifted. "So she's got some unaccepting family?"

"Oh, yeah. Big time. But her parents are divorced, she never really sees him."

Dana began writing in her notebook. "Well, that doesn't surprise me in the slightest… Have you ever been in a relationship before?"

Tori rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I dated this guy Danny when I was a freshman, and it's a relationship I actually remember fully. We were together before I went to Hollywood Arts."

"Can you tell me a little bit about it?"

I can, but I really don't want to. "Sure. Uhhh… he was the first boy to give me a single ounce of attention. I felt pressure to have a boyfriend because that's what all girls want in high school. He was really cute, cuter than most of the other boys at school. So we just kind of hung out for a few months. He tried to be romantic sometimes, but it was awkward. We bickered a lot because he was impatient and could be moody."

"Hmm, so not very fond of him now?"

"Nope."

"What's different with Jade?"

"Everything," she exhaled. "When she came to see me at the hospital, it felt like I had known her for a million years. I forgot everything about Hollywood Arts but something about her just felt familiar. She's beautiful, and all my friends were there telling me their favorite story about me from school, and when it got to her turn she just… looked at me and said that I was incredible. It made my heart stop, like, I don't even know why."

Dana shifted her posture. "So even upon first meeting her again, you were drawn in?"

"Absolutely, she's stunning and her voice is so beautiful. She's so talented, watching her act gives me butterflies. Ah, God I never used to say stuff like this. I always thought it was cliche and weird!"

The therapist chuckled and took a sip of water. "How did you feel when you learned about your rocky history with Jade?"

Tori shook her head and stared into the distance. "I read through pages and pages of texts. Not just with her, with all of my friends. To my understanding, I cared deeply about her no matter how she treated me. And deep down, she cared about me, too. She wasn't just mean to me for fun, she's mean to everyone. She's Jade."

"But, she's not mean to you anymore?"

"No, it's just one of those playful mean things. She's definitely crossed the line sometimes, but she's grown since some of those really extreme cases."

"I see… Would you describe her as an impulsive person?"

"Oh, absolutely."

"How is she as a student? Good grades?"

Aren't you supposed to be analyzing me, not my girlfriend? "Uh, yeah actually. She's naturally smart, the type of person who doesn't need to study anything. Annoys the hell out of me."

Dana scribbled a few things more down in her notebook. "Okay, so let's put things in a broad perspective."

Tori stiffened, feeling a negative energy forming. "Sure."

"You and Jade are now dating. It's been about seven weeks since the accident, which means you've known her for seven weeks."

"But, but I've learned two years of my history with her, so it really feels like longer than that."

"Sure, it does. But I want you to consider that people grow and change over time, and you never really know someone until you've been around them for a significant amount of time."

Tori's shoulders slumped. This was everything she was afraid of hearing, and it was annoying for Dana to say it was adorable in the beginning, only to turn upon learning some closer details with Jade. What was she thinking right now that changed her reactions so quickly? "I mean, sure. Everyone around me says it makes sense. And I liked Jade before the accident, so… what's the problem?"

Dana herself couldn't answer immediately, clearly, she had been thrown off a bit by Tori's question. "There's no problem, your happiness is a priority and if this is a healthy relationship, that's all that matters. I just want you to be careful with your perception of all these stories and histories that you're learning about your time at Hollywood Arts. As much as you can piece together every little detail, it isn't quite the same as actually living through it and experiencing it as you did originally."

Jesus Christ, give me a break. "Okay, so… what else was I supposed to do?"

"I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying to be aware that you're experiencing everything, even memories, in a different mindset than before."

Tori folded her arms over her newly aching stomach. "Okay, yeah, I know. Are you saying I shouldn't trust Jade?"

"No, no, no! Not at all. I think it's wonderful you and Jade are together. But you have known Jade as she is in this moment for a tiny fraction of time. She's bound to morph as a person soon, especially with graduation coming up, and I don't want you to become so familiar and so reliant on your concept of past and present Jade, so that when things change you get uncomfortable. That's my point here."

Okay, that's entirely fair. And I hate change, so I probably needed to hear that. "Oh, wow. Okay, I see your point. I get it."

"You will grow, too. I know your life feels like you're in limbo constantly with your past and getting in touch with who you want to be right now, but everybody shifts and changes no matter what. And that's something that couples need to be aware of in any scenario, not just you and Jade because of your situation."

Tori wished Jade was with her at this moment, hugging and reassuring her. "You're right."

Dana took a few seconds to let Tori breathe and settle with those thoughts before shifting subjects. "What else is going on?"

The younger girl propped her shoulders back again and straightened her spine. "Um. I'm pissed at Beck, Jade's ex. And my sister."

"Why?"

"Because Beck blabbed to Trina that Jade and I are together. I hadn't even come out to Trina yet."

Dana shook her head and shut her eyes. "That's so invasive and immature of him."

"Yeah, I hate him. Trina's the one person that's not okay with it. She hates Jade."

"Why?"

Tori wondered where the best place to begin would be. "Um, Jade is very blunt with Trina. Doesn't sugarcoat anything. And Jade hates Trina"

"What's Trina like?"

"You don't want to know," Tori's voice dropped.

Dana frowned with confusion and nodded. "Okay. Well when you see Trina again, what are you going to say to her?"

Don't date Beck he's a fucking prick. "Um, that I'm extremely upset with Beck for what he did and it makes it even weirder that she's apparently seeing him. Or likes him, or whatever."

"Wait, wait… Beck, Jade's ex-boyfriend, and your sister…"

"Yup. You got it."

Her therapist cleared her throat and modified her posture again. "Okay, that's certainly interesting."

"They won't last. They're the two worst people I know."

Dana couldn't help but laugh at Tori's clear agitation in her quick comment. "Wel, I definitely think you should try and clear things up with her. Maybe she'll realize it was wrong of him to-"

"Oh, no. She won't do that."

"I guess I'll be waiting to find out how it went then."

Tori made sure to not have her phone out during class again. Turns out, something else would get her spoken to today.

"My dad really doesn't like her. But I don't think he hates her or anything."

Cat twirled a lock of hair around her finger and raised her eyebrows at Tori. "You sure about that?"

The brunette tapped her pencil on her notebook. "I don't know, I think he'll chill a little bit. Ugh, and Trina's coming home for Thanksgiving and I am dreading talking to her."

"Yeah, she's not very happy."

"Plus, she's into Beck now?!"

Cat giggled. "She's always been into Beck."

"Yeah but I think it might be mutual now?" Tori heard her teacher moving at his desk, but he was just leaning back in his chair and shuffling through papers, not looking to speak to her about her behavior. Yet.

"Gross," her friend gasped in response. "Since when?!"

"No clue. I need to ask her about it because I don't want to talk to him for a long time."

"That's fair," Cat chirped before showing Tori the work she had completed on her paper so far. Tori was convinced by this point that there was so much partner work in the class so her teacher could be lazy and not have to deal with students who are taking this class to achieve a credit required as a senior.

Tori glanced over Cat's notes. "Wow, did you actually read it?"

"Sparknotes!"

"Ah, that's what I had to do for Laramie to even remotely understand what was going on."

Cat started giggling out of the blue, causing Tori's face to fall into a frown. "What's so funny?"

"There's something on your neck," the redhead managed between hushed giggles.

Tori's hand pawed at her neck repeatedly, figuring it was probably just an accidental pen mark or something. She eventually looked down to her fingers to notice dark lipstick, that's when her eyes bulged out of her head.

"Oh my God! That's been there for a few classes now, come on!"

"Everyone knows why you guys leave lunch," Cat craned her neck, leaning in closer to Tori while poking her arm repeatedly.

Tori looked down at her friend with a scowl. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever. We're dating, that's what people do."

"Every day, though?" The other girl squinted her eyes slightly and smirked.

Tori's temperature rose by the second. She tried to come up with something to downplay the fact that she is making out with her girlfriend during lunch every day, but she gave up. "It's not my fault Jade's a really good kisser!"

"Oh I know, right!"

Cat turned her eyes back to her paper, humming silently to herself as if she hadn't just related to Tori on the topic of kissing Jade. Tori's mind had three immediate questions. 'You know, as in, you've kissed Jade?' was the first, if that was a yes, then would come 'Why did you kiss Jade?' would come second, and the third was 'Why would you tell me this?' but none of those were included in Tori's response.

"What?" If Tori was overthinking and Cat had accidentally used the wrong wording, then this simple question would save her from feeling like a paranoid, jealous monster.

"She is a good kisser," Cat stated simply. Tori figured that in this scenario, two friends wouldn't discuss having kissed the same person before when one person was newly dating said person.

Okay, onto the second question. "Why did you guys kiss?" Tori felt a sharp pain in her stomach after asking.

The redhead shrugged, still completely unbothered or sensitive with the topic. "It was a long time ago, it was just for fun."

Tori wasn't sure if that new bit of information comforted her or further panicked her. "For fun? You weren't even dating?"

"No, silly. She's scary," Cat giggled and hid her mouth with her hand.

"Well, you kissed her so she can't be that scary."

"We just wanted to try it! It was a sleepover and we were just curious."

"Oh, I'm sure you were," Tori turned her shoulders and face away from Cat. She pretended like she was reading over the next page in her packet, but the longer she tried to focus on the words, the more blurred her vision became with held back tears. Cat noticed it; Tori was never able to hide her emotions well from anybody.

"Are you okay?"

The brunette huffed, letting her shoulders cave. "Yeah, great."

"Tori, it was like two years ago it doesn't matter-"

"Weren't she and Beck dating two years ago? Why did you guys... it doesn't... Whatever. It's fine," she waved her hand dismissively and attempted to bury her face in reading again.

"It's clearly not fine and I didn't mean to make you sad."

"I said it's fine!" Tori shouted, stopping the quiet conversations around the classroom. She paused at the moment after yelling, wishing she could just beat herself in the head for acting like a jerk. Her hands clenched into fists as she closed her eyes to hold her breath.

Before she could even notice the faces around her staring in her direction, Mr. Sheppard spoke. "You're not going to act like that in this classroom unless you want to meet with the principal."

"Sorry, I need to go," Tori grumbled as she shoved her things into her backpack. Cat whimpered, whispering little encouragement in an attempt to get Tori to stay, but nothing would convince her. She briskly walked down the center of the classroom, stopping at her teacher's desk to whisper to him.

"I'll be at Lane's, I'm sorry," she whispered, leaving quickly so the man had the chance to respond.

Today, 2:06 PM

can you come to the janitor's closet?

Of course. Everything okay?

not really, I need to talk to you about something

Jade's pencil fell out of her hand as she read Tori's text. She hates you. She's going to leave you already. Someone told her some past story and she hates you. Or her parents got into her head. Or she was just wrong about herself. Or there's someone else.

Or it's nothing, and she needs to talk to you.

Be right there, Jade had texted back before picking up her bag and leaving class without saying a word to her teacher.

How did you fuck this up already? What the fuck were you thinking when you thought something nice might actually work out for you? You thought it was going to be this easy, didn't you?

Jade opened the door slowly, finding Tori sitting on a bucket with her upper body hunched over. She lifted her head, her elbows still pressed into her knees.

"What's going on, are you okay?" She stayed back in case her worst suspicions were true, she wouldn't want to go in and touch Tori if she was going to break things off this soon.

"Cat just told me you two have kissed, and I know I really shouldn't care because it was so long ago and-"

Jade sighed aggressively, slapping a hand to her forehead. "She doesn't understand."

Tori scowled. "Doesn't understand what?"

"That saying something like that would upset you given the circumstances. How'd it come up?" Okay, she's not leaving you. Jesus Jade, get a grip.

"She was teasing me over how we leave lunch every day to, you know... and I said that it wasn't my fault that you're such a good kisser, and she was all 'I know right!"

Jade shut her eyes and shook her head. "I love her, but I want to pop her head like a balloon right now."

"No, I don't want to make this into a big deal, I'm not mad at her. She didn't mean any harm by it, it was a topic to relate to."

"Well, she needs to learn why this isn't okay to say. What happened, you got upset and left?"

Tori began to hold back tears again. Her face fell into her hands again as she wept. "I yelled at her."

Jade approached Tori then, inviting her softly to come to hug her. Tori agreed and wrapped her arms around Jade's waist. She felt the other's embrace tight around her upper back and felt secure even while her mind was running rampant with questions and negative emotions surrounding this conversation.

"I don't blame you for being upset. I wouldn't like it either."

Tori laughed through a sob and pulled away. "Really? Because I feel horrible!"

"No, that's never a fun thing to hear, especially since we became official, you know, last night," Jade laughed softly while stroking the hair that framed Tori's face and locking eyes with her. "But we're going to make this right."

The eye contact grounded Tori, allowing her to breathe again. "Okay, I trust you and I'm not worried that you guys have something going on right now or anything."

"I know that, but I'm making Cat come down here because this shouldn't have happened this way," Jade brushed beside Tori to take a turn sitting on the bucket. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket before sitting down. Tori gathered herself and wiped a few tears away. More and more questions flooded her mind, but she was at least thankful that Jade wasn't upset with her for having a rather jealous reaction.

"Would you have told me eventually?" Tori asked in a mumble.

Jade looked up from her phone screen. "Hmm?"

"Like, that you and Cat had kissed before. Would you have told me if Cat never did?"

The corners of Jade's lips pulled downward. "I mean, probably. But I don't think I would have planned it out or anything."

This probably wouldn't be such a big fucking deal to you if you remembered anything about your personal or dating life in the last two years. Jade probably knows of more people that you kissed than you do. "Do you know everyone I've kissed?"

Jade cackled. "Probably not. I know a few."

Tori's stomach dropped. How many people have I kissed that I have absolutely no memory of? "Like who?"

"Ryder was my least favorite," Jade folded her arms and laughed through a hum. "We both already know about Beck," she emphasized with an edge to her tone, but it was playful and sarcastic.

"Sorry," Tori whispered through a grimace.

"I'm sorry for you, " Jade laughed. "Ummm let's see…"

Cat interrupted Jade's thought by bursting through the door and nearly taking Tori out.

"Hi, Cat," Jade's voice boomed in the small room.

"Hiii," her voice was raspy and hushed. "Tori, I'm really sorry!"

"Don't," Jade stood from the bucket and walked over to the short girl. "Tori needs us to confirm that there is absolutely nothing to worry about, despite the fact that… a long time ago… we kissed," the dark-haired girl struggled to finish the sentence at the guilt of saying it around Tori alone.

Cat shrugged and eyed Tori with sorrowful eyes. "Of course. Anything you need."

Tori blinked at the two standing before her. She took a few moments to think about what she wanted to know first. "It was a sleepover?"

Words immediately started flying out of Jade's mouth. "Okay, so the first time Beck and I broke up, I came to your house and cried to you. I didn't want to be at my dad's that night because naturally, he makes everything worse. So, I went to Cat's. It was late, I had talked my ass off complaining about him. We were watching this show, there was a girl in it who had a girlfriend. I wanted to try kissing a girl, so I asked Cat."

The brunette despised the fact that as her girlfriend told this story, she visualized the entire thing in her brain while the two girls involved were currently standing right in front of her. "And?"

"That was it! We knew we were friends, we weren't into each other in the same way that you two are. Nothing else happened and nothing else was talked about," Cat responded with an urgent tone. She doesn't respond well to yelling, so her motivation to ease Tori's upset was driven by overwhelming guilt that she caused someone to yell.

Tori groaned. "Okay, but like. Now you know that Jade's a good kisser too and that's just weird!"

"Why's it weird?" Cat shot back. Tori eyed Jade, who was doing a pretty terrible job at hiding a smirk with these compliments.

The brunette threw her hands in the air. "Because we're all best friends, two of us are dating, and like we've all kissed each other!"

"Well, not all of us," Jade chuckled as she folded her arms.

Cat suddenly gasped. "Tori, I've never kissed you!"

Tori glanced at Cat, wondering what could possibly be going through her mind now. "Good to know."

"Well, what if we did kiss!"

"No!" Tori screeched, taking a step back. "What's the point?!"

"Well, I don't know. Maybe we could just call it even. And then you can know what it's like to kiss someone without having any romantic ties to them."

Jade shrugged and tilted her head. "Whatever, if that'll help then so be it."

Tori gestured her hands toward Jade, stammering as she tried to find the words to say how utterly bizarre this was. "How do you not care!"

"Because I know Cat isn't going to affect our relationship," Jade put simply. "I'm here to see this happen, it's not like any secrets are being kept, I know why it's happening, how it's happening, where it's happening-"

"Well, isn't that nice that you get to know all about my non-romantic kisses and I find out about yours from the person you were non-romantically kissing!"

"Tori," Jade began, half smiling as this bickering conversation almost felt like old times again. She was cut off by her girlfriend's voice.

"No, you know what? Maybe Cat's right, maybe for some messed up reason it might help…" as Tori spoke, Jade glanced over quickly to Cat and gave her a wink, signaling her to close in on Tori at any time. "If we've all kissed then no one has any different-"

Jade didn't think that her first full day of dating would include this, but it was hilarious to see the way Tori's entire body froze once Cat quickly moved in on her. It was a substantial kiss, Cat made sure of it to match what she and Jade had done. Tori was so taken aback that she hadn't even closed her eyes until Cat's hand slid up to rest on the side of her neck. It was weird because the only lips Tori had known recently were Jade's, but Cat's felt entirely different. She was actually more aggressive of a kisser than Jade, to Tori's surprise. Although, that might be because of the current climate. Tori hadn't realized how unique everyone's lips and kissing styles were, but this reminded her that she didn't want to know. She wanted to know Jade's.

Tori broke back after realizing how long the kiss had lasted due to her curiosity and observations. "What the fuck-"

"Ta-da!" Cat cheered, throwing her arms in the air. "We're all even now!"

Jade began slow clapping, taking in every moment of Tori's nervous mannerisms after breaking away from the kiss. She had even gone so far as to wipe her lips off as if she had just kissed someone horrible. "Bravo, beautiful show, really!"

Tori had never felt so out of place in her entire life. "No offense Cat, but I never want to do that again."

The redhead frowned and pouted her lip. "What, was I bad?"

"No, no! You were, um. You were good, great. I liked it," Tori spoke softly while her eyes found the floor. Her girlfriend easily noticed her blushing cheeks while looking away from Cat.

Jade gasped and asked, "You did?" Which earned her a playful slap on the arm from Tori.

"Stop! No, I just. It felt wrong. You're my friend."

Jade threw her arm around the redhead, who then leaned her head on the other's shoulder. "And now you know how horrible and awkward we felt after the sleepover and why we never kissed again or advanced to anything else."

Tori rolled her eyes and smiled. "Okay, okay. Well, if that's what it took to actually understand, I guess I'm glad I did it."

Jade approached Tori again, carefully placing her hands on her shoulders. "Good. And, not to bring this up, but even if you did know about Cat and I kissing before-"

"I would have forgotten, I know," Tori sighed. It was at that moment that she realized that none of this mattered at all because Jade was right. She would have had to learn that bit all over again regardless. "Wow, now I just… feel awful. I would have had to be told that again anyway."

"Right," Jade whispered, her hand brushing down Tori's upper arm. "Everything is okay, but I completely understand the feeling. I've reacted worse to it, too."

Cat stood motionless, her eyes followed Tori's every move as she continued to wait for a positive interaction with her friend again. "I'm sorry, Tori. I should have known it would be weird to say, I just knew what you meant so I agreed with you."

"I know, I'm sorry I yelled, Cat. I know you don't like that. You didn't deserve it."

She smiled in return. "It's okay, I should have known better."

Tori took a deep sigh and pushed her shoulders back as she exhaled. "Okay, I need to exit this room and not come back in here for a very long time until I can wipe that memory from my brain," Tori bowed her head while heading toward the door.

"Good luck with that," Cat called after her before she and Jade exited the closet laughing.

"You enjoyed it," Jade insisted with a smile she couldn't wipe away.

Tori didn't want to admit it, but clearly Jade saw straight through her. "I don't know, yeah I did! I wasn't expecting her to… know exactly what she's doing."

" I know right?" Jade imitates Cat's words that started the whole situation in the first place. Her hand had fallen to Tori's thigh, initiating the next phase of their time in the car. Tori knew that Jade didn't pick her up for rehearsal a half hour early for nothing. The simple touch alone was electrifying, and Jade knew Tori was eager from her knees squeezing against each other.

The brunette noticed her lungs working harder as she eyed Jade's slender fingers decorated with rings. "Well, I'm glad I have even more to learn with you."

Jade's eyes glistened as the afternoon golden sunlight colored them to show a million colors. "I'm learning just as much as you are."

Tori scowled, trying her hardest to maintain her cool once Jade's thumb stroked her inner leg. "What do you mean?"

"Kissing is one thing, other things, at least with a girl, are completely new to both of us, right?" She licked her lips and noted Tori's smirk. The brunette couldn't deny that it made her feel special to be the first girl Jade would ever be with.

"Everything is new to me, I think."

Jade's lips separated. "Wait, so you and Danny never…"

"I mean, kind of? But not really. Plus, that was a long time ago. I'm not sure he knew what he was doing. Everything I remember that he did was completely awkward and I don't like thinking about it."

"Well, what about what you did?" Jade asked with anticipation.

"I was too scared to do much," Tori replied. She sounded upset, scowling while her eyes fell.

The dark-haired girl nodded. "Are you scared now?"

Tori's eyes flashed in Jade's direction. She was unfairly beautiful, her skin perfectly pale and smooth, every expression was perfect and her lips always enticing. "No."

"Good," Jade spoke softly. She turned away abruptly to unbuckle and begin to climb out of her seat. "Just saying this isn't going to be graceful."

Tori looked away as Jade awkwardly climbed into the backseat over the center console. She laughed quietly to herself, wondering exactly how far they'd go. Wondering if someone would park next to them and call the cops. Wondering if she'd be good enough to learn with. At least they parked in the back parking lot, where no one parks in the evening. All her worries disappeared as she focused harder on not hurting herself while following Jade into the back seat.

"This is so awkward."

"Well, you were welcome to get out through the door and come back, but that might be a little obvious," Jade spoke with a sarcastic tone.

"Yeah, yeah," Tori mumbled once she was situated. "Alright, now what?"

Jade took a moment, studying a new type of reserved Tori. She couldn't even show a nervous smile like she usually does; her hands folded neatly in her lap as she sat perfectly upright, slightly angled toward the other.

Jade inched herself closer. "Whatever you're comfortable with."

Tori's tongue grazed over her own lips. "We could always pick up where we left off last."

Blue eyes trailed down to Tori's tongue, already longing to explore. As she leaned in, Jade whispered, "Great idea. I believe my hand was right around here."

The brunette's breath hitched as Jade's fingers rested on her waist. Jade laughed through a hum before locking her lips on Tori's. Obvious traces of mint on Tori's breath made Jade smirk at the thought of Tori eating several mints in one sitting like she often does as a nervous tactic. Tori melted into the heat of Jade's breath against her own; and her slow, patient lips made her head spin. There was so much Tori wanted to do, but she was beginning to understand that kissing somebody faster won't necessarily get you to the next step quicker. Almost every make-out scene she had ever seen was emotionally charged, after a long build-up for the romantic storyline, that by the time the characters actually kiss, it's fervent and high energy. Tori wasn't expecting how slow Jade moved, and how relaxed she was. She had spent several nights imagining how Jade's intimate behavior would match her intense, sadistic attributes, but her smooth lips and slow-moving hands down Tori's legs proved her idea wrong.

Jade pulled her lips away for a moment and pressed her forehead against Tori's. "You're so hot," she exhaled and laughed, drawing a hoarse laugh from Tori.

"You're… yeah. You're really hot," Tori's eyes flickered down over Jade's chest as she laughed quietly.

"Is it okay if I touch you?" Jade asked, somehow in a tone that did not ruin the mood at all.

It took Tori by surprise, thinking of course you can touch me, please touch me, why haven't you touched me yet? She kept her reply to a simple, "Yes."

Jade's lips were on Tori's again, a change of pace pushing Tori's heart rate a little faster. Her tongue danced just on the edge of Tori's bottom lip between kisses as Jade wondered if the other would try the same. Of course, Tori has always been incredibly smart and caught on with the new motion quickly. Tori took a moment to inhale, leaving her lips slightly agape for Jade to fully swipe her tongue up Tori's bottom lip and meet at Tori's to push lightly against it. Just as Tori remembered Jade was going to touch her, Jade realized she hadn't yet. Her hand slowly moved up from Tori's thigh, brushed up her torso, and then Jade's fingers sprawled over Tori's breast.

Tori broke the kiss abruptly, letting her head fall back slightly as she moaned. Although she was sure she knew the answer given how drenched with lust that moan was, Jade asked, "Is this okay?"

"Yes," the other replied quickly. Before Tori could move, Jade took the opportunity to attach her lips to Tori's exposed neck. It was something Tori was used to; Jade had the idea of introducing one new thing while simultaneously performing something Tori had already experienced and enjoyed. She performed her usual way, teasing with what felt like would become hickeys, but never forceful enough to cause a mark. It was just enough of a new sensation for Tori that could potentially work up later on. Jade was greatly appreciating feeling through Tori's shirt and bra, but she wished it was her mouth replacing the current location of her hand. To distract that thought, knowing now wasn't the most ideal time to do that, Jade used her other hand to bring Tori's head down again to kiss her.

Tori realized that she hadn't opened her eyes once since Jade began at her neck. This in combination with the other's hand on her breast, she had never felt this hot before, including her own late-night self-indulgences. Jade's hand moved to the other breast, wondering how Tori's hands haven't found her own yet. Tori exhaled again, allowing Jade to speak. "You can touch me, too," Jade whispered. Brown eyes opened themselves to catch the most sultry expression on Jade yet as her teeth were biting down on her lower lip. Tori greatly appreciated the invitation and reached her hand up to press into Jade's breast. Looking at them was one thing, but feeling them and securing her fingers around them was another. And Jade's vocal response? Tori had a hard time believing this moment wasn't a dream as Jade hummed with pleasure in a low tone that vibrated her chest.

Their lips worked faster now, more like those intensely passionate movie make-out scenes. Tori's tongue had made advancements since the more restrictive suggestions before. Jade could tell Tori had never tried that before, and maybe it was a bit too much, but Jade thought it was never fair to judge someone's "skills" in an explorative state. Just Tori's eagerness alone was doing plenty to turn her on, but to throw her off, Jade finally bit down gently on Tori's lower lip. The action caused Tori to shiver underneath Jade's hand that had still been fondling her breast.

Tori took a moment to think over everything that had happened so far, overanalyzing every single action between the two. "Am I, um, doing okay?"

This disheartened Jade; Tori should never for a single second be worried that she isn't making Jade fall in love with her in a million ways at once. "You're doing incredible," she spoke slowly, her hands removing themselves from Tori's breast and neck. Tori laughed nervously, appreciating Jade's words and the ongoing label of "incredible" Jade always assigned her. "Are you feeling okay?"

Tori removed her hands from Jade's body, too. "Very okay," she couldn't help but laugh as she took the time to fix a few locks of hair.

Jade sighed and checked the clock. "We still have, like, ten minutes."

The brunette wanted everything, but with rehearsal coming up soon, and how uncomfortable doing the desired activities would be in the back of a small car, she knew it wasn't probably. "Lucky me."

Jade snickered and used both hands to hold Tori's face and pull her in again. Tori never wanted to stop kissing Jade, and she had never experienced this feeling with Danny. She felt safe, loved, desired, respected, and every single second that passed made Tori feel like her life had fully turned into something beautiful since the accident. She realized that Jade had been working that feeling up since day one.

The fair-skinned girl pulled back, interrupting Tori's uncontrollable romantic thoughts. Her eyes focused on Tori's as she spoke, "Next time we do this, in the car specifically, don't wear jeans."

Tori needed a brief moment to figure out why Jade would make such a request, but it was obvious when it clicked in her mind. She bowed her head and laughed, the sound making Jade almost tear up. "Good idea."

Jade hummed and leaned in to kiss Tori once again when the brunette noticed something. After they parted, Tori whispered. "Well, you're not wearing jeans."

"Correct," she responded, voice hushed and low. She watched Tori's eyes fall down and studied the way her lips moved slightly at the sight of Jade's tights. "Though, these are hard to take off and on again standing up, let alone in a car."

Tori laughed again, her forehead falling to Jade's shoulder. "Shit."

"It's okay, don't worry," Jade managed to say nonchalantly, though she knew exactly how wet she was, and she would have to live with it for the rest of the night. That's when she had an idea. " Although , I could always steal a pair of pants from costuming and say my tights ripped and I didn't want to wear the skirt for rehearsal."

The other's eyes widened as she glanced back at the clock. "Nine minutes."

Jade smiled contently, causing Tori's heart to beat out of her chest. Fuck, what have I gotten myself into?

"Want me to help you? I can talk you through it," Jade's voice was almost a whisper.

Touching you or… going down on you? At this point, I don't even care. I'll do anything if you keep talking to me like that. "Yes, please."

That's when Jade reached up her own skirt, making sure to pull her tights down without bringing her panties with them. Tori felt beads of sweat down the back of her neck, a combination of the heat of the afternoon sun through the car window and because Jade wanted Tori, nine minutes before they needed to go inside to get ready for rehearsal. Jade had to kick her boots off by the time the tights were down to her ankles, and though she said it was difficult to remove them, her eagerness sure helped her with this motion swiftly.

"Okay, now…," Jade began as she brought her face close to Tori's again. "I want you to feel me."

Tori swallowed hard as her lips begged for Jade's. "Okay. I'll, uh…"

"Put your hand on my thigh first, then we can work up to it," Jade's voice was husky, and Tori quickly noticed that Jade wasn't going to lock their lips together any time soon so she could be able to talk and direct. While Tori wanted the security of Jade's lips, she also wanted to be reassured.

Tori's fingertips grazed over Jade's smooth skin, memorizing every freckle and curve. Jade's legs weren't too far apart, fully hoping for Tori figuring that one out herself and doing something about it. The closer she inched to Jade's inner thigh and tracing circles with her middle and ring finger, the harder her girlfriend would breathe. Tori could feel Jade's heat the closer she traveled up Jade's leg, and the louder noises Jade made persuaded Tori to graze her lips over Jade's neck. Her skin was lightly coated with sweat, but her back arched off of the seat. "You're so beautiful, Jade."

Beautiful. That's so fucking soft, Jade thought. Of course, it was a new wave of pleasure all over again. "Please, touch me, Tori."

The brunette was breathing heavily as she carefully brought her fingers up over Jade's black panties, immediately noticing the damp, warm fabric against her fingertips. Jade finally reached for Tori's face to kiss her, causing Tori to laugh through the kiss. She worked her fingers in slow circles, knowing damn well that with no experience, it would be hard to find the spot that needed attention with no clear sight. The only thing Tori could see was Jade's rising and falling chest, and her bare legs now spread open. The skirt still covered the area that Tori was currently feeling while her head spun.

"That's good, that's…" Jade trailed off before squeezing her eyes shut and throwing her head back. Tori was desperate to go even further, every next moan and expression from Jade made Tori determined to perform better than anything Jade had ever had before. "Shit."

Tori resorted to something slower, just her middle finger tracing up and down over Jade's center. She kissed Jade again, changing the motions of her fingers every now and then, each new pattern pulling a different whimper out of her girlfriend. "You really haven't done this before?"

"No, just... research," Tori exhaled through a laugh.

"I'm not sure porn is the best research," Jade teased, "But then again, I can't complain about this."

Tori blushed while the desire to prove herself even further crept up inside her. "Can I um, go under your-"

"Yes," Jade cut her off and exhaled sharply. "I didn't want to ask until you wanted to."

The brunette smiled, appreciating Jade's patience and treatment of Tori's comfort. Tori herself was shocked that every next move made her want to try more, but Jade made it impossible to not want every single inch of her. She studied Jade's face as her fingers crept up to the top of her girlfriend's panties, and then her fingertips were on Jade's bare skin. Tori's digits soon reached where Jade desperately needed to be touched, and Jade was soaked. The brunette smiled, knowing that she had made herself this wet before at just the thought of Jade alone; now, she was here, doing this to Jade and now had the power to do something about it.

Jade immediately lifted her hips, causing friction against Tori's gentle fingers. It was somewhat easy for Tori to find the spot, she had touched herself enough to have a rough blueprint of where to go. Jade inhaled, hissing through her teeth at the sensation of Tori's fingertips rubbing over her clit. "Fuck," she whispered while her upper body tensed.

Tori laughed through a hum, bringing her lips close to Jade's ear. She wanted to say something, and almost had the urge to whisper "I love you," but Jade let out a full whine, contributing to Tori's own pleasure and dampness between her legs. Her fingers ever so slightly increased their speed but kept the same circling motion. Jade's legs were trembling, small jolts encouraging Tori to make sure she didn't get off track.

Jade's lips parted as she slightly scowled, turning her head to kiss Tori. She whined throughout the kisses, causing Tori to moan herself as her fingers worked a little faster. Jade broke away from the kiss as one of her hands suddenly grasped Tori's thigh for support. " Fuck, Tori,"

Hearing her own name from Jade's mouth in this desperate state pushed Tori to a state similar to climax, but she persisted with her hand while Jade's hips rocked faster against it. The brunette refrained from saying any words or phrases she had come to know, used for situations like this, but would never stop beating herself up if it was awkward or ruined the moment.

Jade's fingers dug into Tori's thigh as she could feel herself unraveling. A procession of broken exhales and restrained hums along with a trembling lower body left Tori fascinated at what she had just caused, let alone the realization of how wet her fingers were from Jade's arousal. The fair-skinned girl's eyes had been closed, but her face relaxed into a light smile as she grounded herself and her muscles had returned to a relaxed state. Tori's hand slid out from Jade's panties, though she was unsure what to do with it now that Jade had cupped both of her hands on Tori's cheeks and pulled her in for a kiss.

Tori couldn't believe this entire situation, believe herself, or that she had just made Jade cum in the backseat of her car in the school parking lot. "Fuck," Tori suddenly hissed, her head looking out every window of the car. Still no cars in the parking lot, but who knows if anyone had been through or not.

"You just made me cum and the first thing you're going to say is in fear of anyone being around?" Jade's breathing had yet to be regular, but she was only teasing Tori.

"No, no! No, I'm sorry," Tori giggled, bringing her lips to Jade's again. Her lips had become cold from inhaling and exhaling with wet, parted lips for a prolonged period of time. "I had just forgotten that the world existed while that was all happening."

"Me too," Jade whispered, her eyes beaming over Tori's softened face. "That was really fun. I'm surprised by you."

Tori scowled, looking down at her hand. "Why surprised?"

Jade smirked, feeling the urge to pull Tori's hand up to her mouth and lick her fingers clean, but perhaps it was too much too soon. She reached for her backpack to find her small collection of tissues. "I thought we were just going to make out, and along comes you and your allegedly "inexperienced fingers" making me cum within five minutes."

The brunette scoffed. "I swear! Who else would I have done this with!"

Jade shrugged. "Maybe just to yourself? Is that how you were doing all your 'studying?'" She held out a tissue to Tori.

Tori took it and wiped her hand clean before getting her own sanitizer out of her bag. "Shut up."

The dark-haired girl snickered and pulled her tights all the way off her feet before putting her boots back on. "It's really impressive, you must've worked overtime to reach that level of skill."

Tori blushed even harder. "Stop it!"

"I'm not wrong am I?" Jade licked her lips.

The other sighed. "No, okay? You're not," she mumbled before climbing to the front seat again. While her upper body was over the center console, Jade couldn't help but to smack Tori's ass hard while it was right in front of her face. Tori let out a cry, then a laugh. "You're a pain in the ass, literally ."

"I know," Jade shrugged. She crawled into the driver's seat next, laughing along the way at how much more difficult it was getting to the front than getting to the back. Once she was seated, she checked herself in the mirror and immediately grabbed her lipstick from her bag.

Tori took the time to check around the parking lot again. "I have a hard time believing that nobody came around the lot while we were here."

Jade sighed. "Even if they did, what's the worst that could have happened?"

Tori's eyes widened. "Pictures taken of us! Posted on The Slap! I don't know!"

"Our phones would be blowing up by now if that happened," Jade said before quickly reapplying her lipstick. Tori figured that was true, but would continue to worry about it for some time. "Alright, time to go act innocent?"

The brunette raised her eyebrows. "I'll try."

Jade started her car and chuckled to herself. "No, you will, or else I'll have to prove how dirty you are another time."

Tori's heart dropped to her stomach as a shaky laugh escaped her mouth. "I don't think it'll be very hard to prove."

Jade hummed contently, sighing as she stepped on the gas.

The whole cast was rehearsing in character clothes, all thanks to Jade's "I want to practice moving around and being comfortable in my clothing without fidgeting with it" speech to Sikowitz. Jade never had trouble fidgeting with costuming, but the others definitely did, and the teacher figured that she had made the request to change her clothes in hopes of correcting other people's mistakes. She had used that technique before to subtly point out any imperfection within the cast.

Jade was truly an incredible actor; she didn't miss a single beat throughout rehearsal. In fact, she was almost more energetic than usual and had a certain glow about her. Tori would have never thought that the talented girl on stage had been withering underneath someone's fingers an hour ago if those fingers weren't her own.

A/N Whew. This was a ride. Thanks for reading as always!