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Here's another chapter. Don't worry, the action is coming very soon.

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Chapter Seventeen: Behind Blue Eyes

[Gabrielle]

They all had gone on a mission. Even Trench was gone. There was only me and Tool left. I looked at myself in the mirror and could see that the lack of sleep was starting to show under my eyes again.

I hated to lie to them, but I needed to protect them. And maybe myself, just a little. I got dressed and took the elevator to get to the first floor. I had to put a smile on my face. Now wasn't the time to back down from what I was about to ask Tool.

[Tool's]

Tool was smiling to himself. Despite their fears and many doubts, Gunnar was taking care of Gabrielle. The way they looked at each other was enough to make even an old man like himself believe in love again.

He heard the elevator and saw Gabrielle. She got off and walked to him, looking like she was trying to hide in her sweater.

''Everything ok, sweetheart?'' Tool asked.

''Yeah…'' she paused, and he frowned.

''So, what's happening?'' he asked, worried.

She looked at him, and he could see the fear in her eyes.

''I have to ask you something. And I have to ask you to promise not to tell anyone, to not even tell them that I asked,'' she said with a serious tone that surprised him.

''I promise it will stay between us,'' Tool said, wondering what was going on.

''Can you, uh, teach me how to throw knives?'' she asked, and Tool froze.

He hadn't been expecting that.

''Gabrielle…'' he tried.

''Don't tell me you all don't want me to get involved. It's not about that. It's about me being able to defend myself if need be. It's about you not having to wonder if I am ok,'' she explained, and when he saw her getting emotional, Tool took her hand in his own.

She looked at him and exhaled loudly.

''Working with Trench was harder than I let you believe. I was having what he'd called 'episodes'. My hands would start shaking uncontrollably, and I would become overwhelmed by light and sounds. It took me days to get some kind of control over it. Trench almost forced me to stop, but, eventually, I was fine,'' Gabrielle admitted, and Tool could see how hard it was for her to talk about it.

''But I would do it again. Because now I can go over there without even batting an eye, and I feel like I am having nightmares rather than being in one,'' she added. ''And it makes the world not so scary anymore. I don't want to be a survivor or a strong victim. I want to be me. I want to fight. I want to live.''

She looked at him straight in the eyes.

''You are mercenaries, veterans. You've seen and felt things you don't wish on anyone, and I can understand that. But just because you can take it, it doesn't mean you should have to. At least not alone. I can't protect you as much as I want to, yet. But I can at least ease your mind when you have to go and fight by not being helpless. And I will be there for you when you come back.''

Tool felt a wave of love and pride wash over him at her words. It was so strong that he didn't notice the tears in his eyes.

''I am so proud of you, Gabrielle. You are one of the best people that I've ever known, and I love you,'' Tool said while smiling at her. ''I will teach you everything I know, just like I promised I would. And if your father asks, until you are ready to tell him or if I have to, we were doing paintings.''

Gabrielle threw herself at him, and he hugged her.

''So, anything I need to know before we start?'' Tool asked, and Gabrielle passed a hand through her hair.

''Trench may or may not have been teaching me how to shoot guns and some basics in self defense?'' she said with a big smile.

Tool looked at her, then laughed.

''Wow, he's not scared of your father,'' he said, clearly amused. '' Well, how about the basics but with knives?''

[Trench's hangar]

''Holy shit!'' Gabrielle exclaimed when she saw Trench's face.

''I told you I was fine,'' he said to her while she got closer to him. ''Wait, is that your bike?''

She snatched the emergency kit out of his hands and told him to sit down.

''Yeah, and thank fuck I didn't listen to you,'' she retorted back, and Trench sighed.

''You look just like your dad when you get mad,'' Trench commented with an amused smile that transformed into a pained expression when she started cleaning the wound.

''There, it's done. I'll get you some ice before I start cleaning the mess you call a plane,'' she said, and he looked at her with a soft smile.

It was nice being taken care of sometime. His smile grew bigger; he was pretty sure she would have duck taped him to his chair if he'd refused her help anyway.

[Tool]

He looked at the clock and smiled. She would be there soon. Even though Gabrielle was nervous at first, she actually did quite well when he took upon himself to show her how to drive a bike. It had been nothing near as dramatic as Gunnar's set up in the hangar. He'd actually brought her to a parking lot nearby and on the road after a couple weeks. She was learning fast.

And today, she was finally taking her exam. It had been nice to be able to show her something else he liked. She always felt like a daughter to him, but the fact that he could share his passions with her, teach her things…it made him think about how different things would have been if he'd had kids.

But he had her, and he loved her just as much. He looked at her drawings on her side of his new, bigger table and smiled. She had changed his life, and he couldn't be more grateful. He finally heard her bike and turned to welcome her.

''I guess everything went fine?'' he asked, and she smiled at him.

''That it did. Thank you,'' she said before she gave him a quick hug. ''Sorry I am late, but I got lunch, and Trench is an idiot.''

''Nothing new,'' Tool said while helping her putting the food on the table. ''What has he done this time?''

''He went solo on a team mission, got kidnapped and, apparently, was rescued by my dad and the guys,'' Gabrielle explained, and Tool couldn't help but laugh.

''Wow, must have been hard on the ego,'' Tool commented, and Gabrielle snorted.

''Yeah, so much that he didn't noticed how much he was hurt. Thank fuck I can translate the 'Yeah I am back but you don't have to come in yet' to 'I am an actual prideful moron who thinks he don't need no help','' she said, and Tool almost choked on his beer before he laughed out loud.

[Gabrielle]

I was running in a park near Tool's when I felt like I was being watched. I turned my music off and slowed down, trying to look like I was simply trying to catch my breath, which would have looked believable three weeks ago when I first started training to be more efficient in self defence.

I looked around and saw nothing out of place. I sighed. I could still remember the fear going through me when the man had attacked me in the parking lot almost a month ago. While I had been honest about what I'd told both Tool and Trench as of why I wanted their help, I still hadn't told them what happened.

I knew I should have, but I didn't. I frowned. Was it why Trench had been kidnapped? Was my dad and our friends in danger? Why had nothing more happened? It didn't make any sense. I was about to continue my work out when I saw someone looking at me from behind a three. I tried to get closer to see who it was, but it was almost like he'd vanished. I turned around and took another, longer way to make sure to lose him before I got to Tool's to get my car.

[Trench's hangar]

He heard the shots downstairs and got up. He looked through the window and frowned. Gabrielle's car was there. He relaxed slightly and went down the stairs to join her. He was about to let her know that he was behind her when he noticed how focused she was.

He had gotten a little closer when she turned on her heels and pointed the loaded gun at him. He held up his hands and looked at her carefully. She looked scared, terrified even.

''Shit. I am so sorry,'' she said before she put the gun back on the table and removed her protective gear.

''It's ok,'' Trench said, and he could see her hands shaking a little.

He frowned. If he'd had any doubts the day before he went to retrieve the Chinese man, now he knew there was something wrong. And from the look on her face, she was very aware that he knew it.

However, before he could say anything else, she walked by him and left.

''I don't think so girl,'' he said before he went to his truck to follow her.

[Tool]

Something had changed about Gabrielle, and he couldn't quite put his finger on it. It had happened a bit before the guys had been back, and he'd been tempted to tell Barney about it. But he didn't want to alarm him for nothing, especially since they still weren't back from their latest mission. He sighed; these CIA bastards would be the death of them.

That's why he could understand why Billy wanted out. To be honest, a lot of them would do the same if they had a second chance. He looked at his watch and frowned. Gabrielle might have needed that run to not think about them going back so soon on a mission, but she had never been that late to one of her lessons.

He heard several bikes and sighed. At least the boys were back in town.

[Tool's]

Even thought Tool smiled at him when he entered the parlor, he could see that his friend was worried.

''Hey man,'' Gunnar said with a smile. "Have you seen Gabrielle?''

He was about to tell him no when he heard Gabrielle's car coming to an abrupt stop in front of the building. Then, they heard a truck do the same right after her.

''What the fuck?'' Toll asked while they all turned to the door.

Gabrielle slammed her car's door shut and they could hear her coming closer.

''Gabrielle stop!'' Trench shouted while he got out of his truck.

The guys looked at each other with a questioning look before they got even closer. They didn't have time to get outside before Gabrielle entered the shop. She was on the verge of tears, and Trench was still following her.

She looked at them, and they could see the blood drain from her face.

''What the hell is happening here?'' Barney asked, and Gabrielle turned to send a pleading look to Trench.

But he was having none of it.

''Don't look at me like that. You need help. You were so scared that you almost shot me this morning,'' Mauser stated.

''Shot you?!'' Barney exclaimed with a shocked face.

''What the…''Gunnar said with the same expression.

''With what?'' Lee asked while looking at them both.

''Where?'' Toll and Hale asked together.

''Why?'' Yang questioned.

They'd all spoken at the same time. The only one who'd been quiet was Tool, and he felt like shit was about to hit the fan. Trench looked at him.

''I don't know what happened, Gabrielle, but you should know by now that you can and always should trust us,'' Mauser told her. ''Why didn't you tell us?''

Barney was about to ask who the other person was when he saw Tool's expression. He could feel the anger rising but tried to stay calm. He needed an explanation first.

''I…I was afraid you'd be mad,'' she said while looking at Tool. ''I was afraid you'd think that I lied to you when I explained you why I needed your help I…''

She could feel that her hands had began to shake again.

''Why would I ever think that, love?'' Tool asked, worried.

''Because while I did tell you the truth when I talked to you, the thing is that there is something that I didn't tell you. The night I went to the restaurant with Billy, I got attacked. And I know I should have told you, but if I did, you would have refused to help and would have gone straight to my dad, and you would all have panicked and put yourselves in danger for me. I couldn't let that happen. Gunnar had just got back, and I didn't want to lose him. So I took the risk of you being mad, but now things got worse, and I don't know what to do, and I feel like shit for not having telling you. Now you're all back and that is not how I thought I'd tell you this because I am fucking sick of feeling like a helpless idiot and…''

They could all see that her hands were shaking, just as much as they could hear the fear in her voice. Trench got closer to her, knowing full well that this was another one of her episodes. Barney felt his anger disappear, only to be replaced by fear. She was in danger, again. Gunnar just looked at her, wondering why she hadn't trusted him with this.

''Gabrielle, look at me. I want you to breathe slowly,'' Trench said to her, and she did so. ''Now we are going to sit down and talk about everything, one step at a time. Ok?''

She nodded while looking at the floor. She couldn't look at any of them in the eyes —she was way too ashamed of herself for that.

''Princess?'' Gunnar asked, and she felt the tears rolling off her cheeks. ''Gabrielle, look at me. We are just worried, älskling.''

Gabrielle looked up when she heard that particular word. He wasn't mad at her, just concerned, and she could see it.

''You're not mad,'' she said with a broken voice, and Gunnar knew instantly why she hadn't talked to him either.

Why she hadn't talked to any of them except for Trench and Tool.

''No, I am not,'' he confirmed, and she started sobbing.

''Tool I…fuck, tell me you know I didn't lie to you,'' Gabrielle said through her tears. ''I know I should have told you more, but I would never lie…I love you way too much to…''

''Of course, I know sweetheart. Hell, I should've known there was something going on when you insisted on the protecting us part,'' he reassured her. '' Please, love, tell us what's happening so we can help you.''

''I…'' she started with a shaking voice.

Then she looked at Barney, and she knew exactly where to start.

''First of all, I am sorry that I hid things from you, one of these things being that I didn't only went back to the hangar to see Trench but to ask him to train me. I didn't only want to be able to get past the shock, I wanted to be able to fight it. He agreed to do it and it did really help, even more than working in his hangar did,'' she explained.

''Is that why you got worse?'' Gunnar asked, and she shook her head.

''No, he actually waited until I was better to start the lessons. At first, I really was only working on his plane,'' she answered before she looked at Lee. ''The morning I came to see you in your room I was just…fed up with being left out. I knew that you all wanted to protect me after how I reacted to killing those men…''

Toll gave her a surprised look. She never talked about it with them.

''And I get why, it's just…it made me feel useless, like the helpless girl you had to take care of, the one who'd just panic or harm herself or was caught in her endless nightmares. Like somehow, I would never be enough and just didn't…''

''Belong?'' Toll finished for her, and she nodded.

''Then what happened?'' Lee asked.

He knew he'd been a little too harsh, but he wanted to know what had happened so that he could protect her. And, not that he'd admit it, he wanted to ignore the memories of that morning in his room, before she went to Trench. Because those memories would remind him of when he helped her with her nightmares and of how it felt to wake up next to her. Now wasn't the time to be sentimental.

''When I went to the restaurant with Billy, the night I was attacked, I offered to bring the car to the door because it was raining. A guy came at me from behind, put his hand on my mouth and…he knew my name,'' she explained, and Barney felt like the world had just collapsed around him. ''I managed to put him to the ground with one of Trench's techniques, and I fled, taking Billy with me. I didn't tell him. I mean that guy could've just heard us talk right?''

''But?'' Hale said, and she looked at him with a scared look on her face.

''I was followed this morning when I went jogging,'' she almost whispered, and Trench finally understood her reaction at the hangar. ''It was the same man. I managed to lose him and to come back but…I was too shaken, and my lesson with Tool wasn't for an hour, so I thought that if I could just make myself remember that I am not completely defenceless…I just, I don't want you to put yourselves in danger.''

''Gabrielle, there ain't no way in hell that we're not going to help you,'' Toll said, and she offered him a sad smile.

''I know, not that I deserve it after I kept you in the dark for so long. I am…'' she began.

''Don't,'' Barney stopped her, and she looked at him. ''I am the one who should apologize.''

''Dad it's not…'' Gabrielle tried again, but he didn't let her finish.

''Yes, it is. From the moment you came here I lied to you. I asked them to lie to you. Then you got hurt and still you loved us, and for what? For me still trying to keep you from a world you already saw too much of? You may not have been honest with us, but I don't think you are to blame for that. I am sorry, Gabrielle. I was too convinced that I could protect you, to help you feel safe on your own,'' Barney finished, and she got up and hugged him.

''It's ok, Dad. I guess we're still learning how to do this,'' she said, and Barney smiled.

''I guess we are,'' he replied before she let him go. ''I love you, and I will protect you, no matter what. And you will continue to train. I will even show you, if you'd like?''

''Of course, thank you,'' she said, and Trench let out a small laugh.

''Like you couldn't already shoot a coin hanging from a rope in the wind in the middle of the night. She's been at it for months now you know?'' Trench mocked, and Barney smiled.

''I guess she got that from me,'' he said, and Trench rolled his eyes.

''I still could use some practice with distance and work on my speed,'' Gabrielle said, and Barney smiled at her. ''Not to mention shooting while moving and reflexes. There's only one thing that helps with that.''

''What?'' Barney asked her, and she took out the knife that Tool gave her as a gift for their lessons.

They all recognized it as one of Tool's favorites.

''Blades. Blades are like an art, and they are faster than bullets too when used wisely,'' she said, and Christmas couldn't help the smile that appeared on his face.

Barney's expression made it even more difficult not to laugh.

''Here we go again,'' Toll said to Hale, but they, too, were smiling.

''Alright, we got to try and do a portrait and find him. Yang?'' Barney said before he went to the office.

Gabrielle looked at Yang following her father and frowned.

''Did I say something wrong?'' she asked to no one in particular, and Lee laughed.

''No darling, you said everything right,'' Christmas answered, and Tool smiled.

They may have been in deep shit, but at least they still had each other.