Flying and Falling

by Desidera

Welcome, Ladies and Gentlemen, to the Gypsy Circus! Let me tell you a tale of love and magic, of pain and sorrow. Let me entrance you. And welcome the stars of the ring! SKxYY, R, AU

4. The Flyer's Game

The Flyer's Game

The breeze is soft today as it strokes the treetops of the small forest. Sunbeams hesitantly make their way through grey clouds on the horizon that look like they are torn by the wind in the sky of gentle blue. The snow, although there is not much left of it, still crunches under Yami's feet as he takes his eyes away from the picture of their quiet camp beside the forest and continues on his path towards the gym.

This time he is alone and has time to go over the routine in his mind. His limbs twitch softly as he anticipates the now familiar movements, there is a sharp nod of his head every time he imagines himself jumping or grabbing the hands of his partner. Only a few more steps lie between him and the gym when he has completed his imaginary performance and he stops for a moment, eyes resting on the front door.

Seto Kaiba is going to be there already. He is always the first, always faster, as if he knows the exact moment of Yami's arrival. Yami does not mind, he likes the idea of being the one Seto Kaiba has to wait for in order to begin their training.

Silently, he enters the building and changes into his training clothes. Having already done his stretches at the camp, he allows himself only a quick check of all his muscles, a small stretch here and there. Then he walks into the large hall of the gym.

By now he and Seto Kaiba are the first ones to do their training in the morning, getting up at about 5 am to be able to do their exercises properly. With the rising sun they walk towards the gym and when their relatives and companions at the camp awake, they are already soaring through the air, tightly secured by the ropes and by each other's awareness.

The inside of the hall is shadowed, for Seto Kaiba refuses to turn on the light. He wants the experience of their training to be realistic, knowing they will not be able to trust their eyes once they are in the ring, blinded by the bright light or shrouded by shadows.

"Good morning", Yami calls up toward the rigging where Seto Kaiba is already climbing, no more than a silhouette between the long ropes. A vague sound of affirmation is his only reply, but he has learned to content himself with this. For as little as he knows about his partner, he has come to know his quirks and habits. Yet, the better he feels he knows the other's movements, the further he seems to drift away from the thoughts behind those intense blue eyes.

As much as Yami understands Seto Kaiba's refusing to turn on the lights, sometimes he wishes for something to clear the shadows, something that shows him the tall man differently. Whenever he watches the other's shadowy movements, he wants to see more. Longing for the ability to read those eyes, he strives to get a better look at them as he feels them rest on him.

He grasps one of the ropes and hauls himself up with strength and experience built up in years of doing only this. Having reached the top he attaches the security ropes and joins his partner in further raising the rigging, securing the metal bars, twice checking knots essential to their safety.

Finally they face each other on opposite pedestals, mentally preparing for the jump. They usually do a few simple catches and throws before they start the routine. For Yami, the term "simple" has been constantly redefined during the last few months.

Seto Kaiba begins the training by jumping off the pedestal and performing a small spin in the air before grabbing the bar on his side of the rigging. The bars they are using have lost their definition as "flying" or "catching" bars. They are now both, whatever they may need them to be. Still on the swing forward, Seto Kaiba hoists himself up until his arms of steel are fully stretched and his hips rest on the bar. He drags his feet after him and they slip gracefully over the bar which slides into the hollows of his knees. He is on the backswing now. Leaning back he increases the speed as gravity has him change course towards Yami, ready for the catch. It is his turn now.

What Yami feels when he jumps are not his feet leaving ground. It is the rush of air in Seto Kaiba's ears and he feels the other's swing, concentrating on it more than on the small somersault he is performing. Their hands meet and clasp and for the duration of a heartbeat, Yami looks into Seto Kaiba's blue eyes, full of intense concentration. When the swing forward has reached its highest point, the tall catcher lets go of Yami's left hand and just before the swing is reversed, Yami lets the now free hand join the right. The beginning reverse swing gives him the chance to now let go with the right hand and turn around fully, so he is no longer facing backwards. This allows him to perform a more complicated spin when Seto Kaiba lets go of his hands, allows him also to land safely on the pedestal.

While Seto Kaiba swings backwards, Yami unties a small strap fixing another bar to the side posts of the pedestal, where it has been kept out of the way. Now it is put to use as Yami swings forward and brings himself into catching position in much the same way Seto Kaiba has done before. The latter has meanwhile returned to flying position, both hands firmly on the bar as he swings towards Yami, faster than him. He lets go of the bar and with only a small somersault reaches out for his hands, grasping safely. A second later he takes off again, towards the pedestal Yami has been standing on. Yami brings his hands up to the bar and lets his legs slide down. He is facing away from Seto Kaiba, but there is no fear when he lets go of the bar and turns in the air only to be welcomed by his partner's strong arms, by the sight of feet planted safely on the pedestal even as he is already pulled up. They rest for a moment, breathing hard, staring at each other with their hands still clasped between them.

"You have come a long way", Seto Kaiba states quietly, a tinge of admiration in his voice that makes Yami's eyes widen. "Ready for the routine?"

Still stunned by the unexpected praise, Yami can only nod, watching the other man take a swing back to the opposite pedestal. Suddenly an all-encompassing idea takes shape in his mind and before he has thought it through he is already calling out to the other.

"Seto Kaiba! It is my turn to challenge you. My every catch is an answer to a personal question I ask you on our way back. The same applies to you. What do you say?"

The silence is so complete and oppressive Yami thinks the other must be able to hear his heart beating. Were he able to move, he would fidget with unbearable nervousness, for it is just like sitting on needles. A challenge to give their professional relationship a different spin has been initiated. It is like adding a new spice to a meal that has become dull with the months, ultimate destruction and surprisingly tasty discovery lie so close. The tension is hard to bear, but finally he hears the answer, dark and obscured by the shadows, "Agreed."

For a moment Yami closes his eyes, swaying slightly, then focussing intensely, preparing mentally for the one routine that could change everything if only he succeeds. Today he has to catch, no matter what. Absent fingers stroke over the bracelet he is wearing, an ancient circus charm made from elephant hair.

Yami is the first one to catch, this time. Tightening his hold on the steel bar he finally takes the leap into the darkness below and soars through the air in a rush of wind, excitement and adrenaline heightening as he imagines rising towards the yellow stars on the top of the tent. At the highest point of his flight his feet come up, slide underneath the bar between his arms and hook around it to prepare for the catch as he is already on the reverse swing. Hanging down by his knees on the next forward swing he experiences an entirely different rush of exciting sensation and anticipation. Slightly turning his head he sees Seto Kaiba jump and perform a complicated movement in the air before coming down to meet his arms, safely. The first catch, the easiest, is completed.

Seto Kaiba's hands are cool in his as Yami reverses the swing, the additional weight first seeming to drag him downwards, then propelling him even higher before they swing forward again. The hands clasped with his are tightening for a moment and then, abruptly, they let go to allow Seto Kaiba a horizontal jump into the air, spinning. Yami, though, is not looking at the breathtaking display of finest trapeze arts for he is already on the reverse swing, away from the other. He knows this trick well, after all it was the first Seto Kaiba ever showed him, or rather forced him to perform. Bar in the hollow of his knees, he swings around in a full circle and catches his partner as he falls out of the air. The reverse swing is almost completed and their hands do not hold onto each other for long. The heavy weight leaves Yami's arms as Seto Kaiba lets go once more and jumps onto Yami's pedestal.

Reaching out for the ropes of the trapeze bar, Yami pulls himself into a standing position, continuing to swing back and forwards while his partner is untying yet another trapeze bar, this one hanging about three metres lower than the other. Seto Kaiba takes this bar into position, swinging one-handed, then sitting down gracefully, waiting. For a moment Yami closes his eyes. A jump of three metres into a pool of water is a challenge to overcome for a young boy on a diving board. A jump of three metres performed in ten metres' height, without putting too much trust into the safety ropes that will be removed for the final performance, is another challenge altogether.

Yami remembers the learning of this particular trick very well. Standing on his bar like he is now, he heard Seto Kaiba's voice from below, "Jump immediately when I tell you to, a single somersault", and then even louder, "I will catch you."

Yami trusted him as he trusts him now. The second trapeze is directly underneath him as he jumps. This fall is fast, faster than any of the falls he knows. There is barely enough time for the somersault before he feels the other grab his hands. Again their eyes meet. It is the first successful catch for Seto Kaiba in their new game.

There is no reverse swing for Yami as he already has to let go and turn once in the air, moving slightly forward in the process to land with both his feet on the metal bar Seto Kaiba is still hanging down from in catching position. Yami, too, facing in the opposite direction, lowers himself down so the bar rests in the hollows of his knees and they are back to back, arms touching full length. Then Seto Kaiba's hands reach for his and he clasps them as his partner lifts his feet from the bar and puts himself in flying position.

Next to them there is a forth bar, almost as low as the one they are performing on at the moment. Seto Kaiba has untied this bar from where it was fixed to the pedestal right in the beginning. In an actual performance the bars will be lowered from the top of the tent by Mokuba Kaiba, the tall artist's brother.

Now, Seto Kaiba jumps forward towards this new bar and slides easily into catching position while Yami puts his hands onto the bar and unhooks his legs to be ready for another jump. With a wide leg movement, he increases the speed and height of the bar, swinging back and forward again three times before he lets go. The tricks, spins and turns he is performing now are the most difficult in the entire routine, and he is totally focussed upon them with all his senses. His hand almost slips past Seto Kaiba's but the tall man manages to grab it in the last second and they swing back safely as Yami releases a small breath from his lungs. They swing forward again and Yami soars up into the air feet-first this time. Bending a little, he performs a somersault right between the ropes of the trapeze bar, meeting Seto Kaiba's hands on their way into the reverse swing. This is the last catch for Seto Kaiba and he has performed them all without mistakes. Only one more, Yami reflects, dimly aware of the fact that it is important somehow, only one more catch and it is his turn.

Seto Kaiba lets go of his hands and Yami is flying down towards the lowest bar again. He grabs it easily and hooks his legs around the bar one last time. The reverse swing is fast and he turns his head only slightly, concentrating hard. He has almost reached the highest point of the swing when Seto Kaiba jumps down. All his limbs are stretched out and the jump is almost vertical. Like a tiger through the hoop of fire he sails through the space between the ropes of the lowest trapeze bar where he bends down and grabs Yami's hands just as the reverse swing begins. The force of his jump is so great he is swinging up again, pulling Yami with him as they both circle the bar once more. When he is directly above the bar, Seto Kaiba lets go and Yami lets himself fall forward to make up for the loss of weight pulling him around the bar. His partner's hands join his on the bar and they now hang back to chest, swinging in unison, pressed together tightly. This is the most exciting rush for Yami, the best part of the performance and this is also where he suddenly remembers the purpose of his game and the three successful catches each of them has completed.

Seto Kaiba's heart is beating against his back, straining out of the other's chest, just like his own, seeking for escape out of the tight confines of the human body. He listens to his partner's breath that gusts over his ear as he closes his eyes and concentrates on the rhythm of the swing to match their movements perfectly. The third swing together ends and Seto Kaiba pushes his body backwards and away from him, bending it and lifting his feet, placing them on the bar. The reverse swing supports his movements, pushing him up onto the bar until he is standing there. Yami follows on the forward swing, raising his legs and sliding into catching position but only to bend his upper body away from the ground where Seto Kaiba grabs his arms and skilfully pulls him into a sitting position between his feet. There they are, Yami sitting, his partner standing above him, each with one outstretched arm. The routine is completed.

"Good", Seto Kaiba says slowly, "With this much concentration the performance should certainly go well. Time to remove the rigging. Then we will talk."

Yami can only nod, overwhelmed all of a sudden. They take down the trapeze bars and pedestals, they untie the knots and free themselves of the security ropes. They leave the basic rigging for the other trapeze artists who will exercise after them. While Seto Kaiba vanishes into the dressing room, Yami remains a few more minutes in the quiet gym, trying to slow his thoughts and his nervous heartbeat. As he finally turns and heads for the door he almost runs into Valon.

"I'm sorry", the young boy apologises quickly and for a moment Yami thinks there is extreme distress and hurt on his face. The strange expression is gone before he can identify it and replaced with a smile. "Hey, Yami! Think you could spare some minutes for me after lunch? There is something I want to talk to you about."

"Certainly", Yami replies amiably, "Can you give me a hint so I know what I'm in for?"

Valon grins, somewhat grimly. "Love advice, Parrot, love advice."

Yami's eyebrows shoot up. "Love advice, from me? Why do you think I am the right person to ask?"

The smaller boy winces a little. "Shh, quiet", he admonishes gently, then shrugs. "I just know. Please?"

With a sigh, Yami nods. "Of course. We will meet at lunch. Good luck for your training."

"Good luck to you too!", Valon calls, smiling a little wider. They part when Yami walks into the changing room.

His tall body leaned against the door post Seto Kaiba is already waiting for him. He is dressed as usual, in a dark violet trench coat over comfortable black jeans and an equally dark shirt. His eyes and face are impassive as he watches Yami putting on his clothes. Once more, Yami's heart is pounding, somewhat differently from the racing heartbeat he experiences on the trapeze. His hands shake just a little as he turns his bare back to the other man and reaches for his discarded clothes. When he is fully dressed, he takes a small breath and steps closer to Seto Kaiba. The tall artist opens the door for him and they walk out into the soft daylight.

The breeze Yami has felt in the morning has now intensified, playing with Seto Kaiba's trench coat as they walk. The sunbeams are warm on their skin but the breeze is still chilly and Yami crosses his arms over his chest protectively.

Seto Kaiba's voice is low and the suddenness of the words surprises him.

"Your game."

For a moment his breath is caught in his throat then he manages to nod. "Of course. I will begin if you do not mind." He takes a minute to consider while the wind tousles their hair and they further make their way towards the camp. "What was your life like, before this, before you joined us?"

There is almost a smirk playing around Seto Kaiba's lips. "I could just say it was crap, but that would be playing a foul game", he answers slowly. "You caught well today, so you deserve a real answer."

Tiny shivers are crawling down Yami's back as he struggles for his calm around the other. Seto Kaiba does not heed it but continues to speak.

"My life began with my adoptive father. I cannot remember my real parents and all that I know is that they apparently couldn't or wouldn't keep me and my little brother Mokuba. Not that our stepfather loved us any better than they did." There is a mirthless, sarcastic laugh as Seto Kaiba's eyes find the horizon and are fixed on the forest behind the distant camp. "He wanted me to become a businessman, just like him, to take over his company, to know it still under his complete control should he be forced to retire one day with me as his heir. I was fascinated at first, but his methods of training his future heir were not exactly pleasant. Then he made a grave mistake. He had always ignored my brother, but when I refused to comply any longer, he used my brother to blackmail me, hurting him in the process. I knew we had to get away by then, so I secretly applied for the National School of Trapeze Arts, finding the means to travel and take my brother with me. I do not know why the idea crossed my mind. Probably because there was a circus in town when all this happened and beneath the starry top I discovered freedom. Mokuba too found a place in our circus school, he can do much more than just juggling, I assure you. I was content, and I finally began to live my own life. Circus school is full of competition and if your soul is not strong enough to stand the constant pressure, you fail or are replaced. It certainly wasn't harder schooling than what my stepfather had put us through."

All of a sudden, Seto Kaiba's eyes meet Yami's once more. "In order to live my own life, to feel this freedom, I have to face danger. I can accept only the highest of skills, for this is what I have been taught all my life. I know I am pushing others too hard but I cannot feel sorry for it. This is the only way of being who I am, being fiercely competitive. And finally, I think, I have found someone who is just like me."

Yami's stumbles slightly upon hearing those words and Seto Kaiba is turning from him with a small smirk playing around his lips again. "I am not like you", Yami tells him, letting his whisper drift on the breeze. His eyes do not speak with the same confidence his mouth possesses.

"Not in every aspect, no", his training partner answers mysteriously. "But I assure you that we are alike, somehow. Because I can feel it and because I knew you could feel it when we met for the first time."

Caught off guard, heart beating with shame and nervousness, Yami does not reply.

"What is your second question?", Seto Kaiba encourages him.

For a moment Yami thinks, but the decision is made all too soon. With a heart raging with the madness of daring he demands, "What is your life like now, here with us?"

There is silence and the wind stops for a moment as if the heavens know a threshold has been crossed. But then Seto Kaiba follows, easily providing the information.

"This is a lot better than my life at the artist school. I am my own master now. And no, before you ask, I do not respect the authority of your ringmaster. I respect him in person and if things run smoothly I certainly won't go against him, but I'll never be restricted. I will be free to do what I want."

Yami cannot help but interrupt, his voice a little harsher than usual, almost disappointed. "It seems awfully egoistic to me. Do we not all depend on each other, here at the circus? We are a family, a team, there is no place for egoism."

"Ahh, you don't know the pleasure of egoism, Yami. You don't know the way you can go if you remain true to your own ideals only and work towards your own achievement. If it is the same as for the others, and I guess this is the case here at your circus, then there are no problems and we all will work towards the same end."

"You did not come for company then." This time there is barely masked devastation in Yami's voice, but Seto Kaiba shakes his head, slightly patronising as if he is dealing with a young child that misunderstands the situation.

"I did come for you, didn't I?"

Once more, Yami is rendered speechless at the bluntness of those words, heart beating faster. Seto Kaiba uses his silence to continue.

"There is still one question for you. You caught three times today."

There is already a question on Yami's lips.

You came. For...me. Why for me?

He swallows quickly. "What do you want your future to be like?", he asks instead.

Abruptly, Seto Kaiba stops. There is something like a laugh in his voice as he speaks. "I never lived in the future. I do not cling to foolish hopes and dreams. I have independence now - that is what I wanted. I want to be the best – that is my ultimate goal. But I do not think I want to be the best on my own anymore."

He turns towards Yami again, eyes boring into his and for the first time they seem to lose a bit of their ice and shine with a quenching fire instead, no less dangerous, no less beautiful.

"Being the best is very lonely. I never minded loneliness, but I begin to think there is something that might make you even better, even bigger. That in life there is something like a trapeze partner that can help you perform better and more spectacular moves than you could ever do on my own."

Yami chuckles a little. "This does not sound like your former praise of egoism, Seto Kaiba."

"I make an exception for someone of equal skill. Because I put the highest value in life in skill, not in egoism. Egoism is a means towards gaining more skill, but I know very well when it is unnecessary or out of place. I'm egoistic when I need to be."

There seems to be spell on the taller man's eye for Yami cannot take his own off the other's face. They stand close to the camp, the breeze in their hair.

"But you also make an exception for your brother, don't you?"

Because you love him.

He almost speaks the words aloud.

"Mokuba does not need any exceptions", Seto Kaiba explains shortly. "He does not belong to the 'rest of the world', no rules apply to him. As much as he is his own person, he is still a part of my soul."

They are silent for a moment, still standing where they stopped. "I need to think", Yami murmurs softly. "We will meet for training tomorrow then."

When he attempts to turn away a strong hand on his shoulder stops him. "We did not get a chance to play the second part of your game. If you have thought enough in the evening, come to mine and Mokuba's house. It is my turn."

Paralysed with the suddenness of the touch, Yami can only nod, before all but running towards his own house.

The door echoes loudly in the empty house as he slams it shut and leans against it, panting softly, eyes wide as he raises his hands and looks at the faint white scars again. As usual after training they stand out more sharply as the blood flows faster through his hands, initiated by the extensive use of his limbs during the trapeze acts. Using them to push his hair away from his face, he takes a look around the small corridor from which three doors lead into separate bedrooms, the kitchen or the bathroom. Then he quickly vanishes into the latter, not wanting to see Yugi right know, being sure that the other will know instantly that something has happened. For now, he has to think on his own.

Hot water cleansing his body, he tries to order his thoughts and emotions, running over the entire training again, remembering Seto Kaiba's answers to his questions. When he looks out of the small bathroom window and sees behind the steamy glass somewhere the small house his trapeze partner lives in, there is a strange lurch in his stomach, not painful but entirely different from anything he has ever felt.

As he returns from the shower, rubbing his hair with a towel on his way to the bathroom, he almost collides with Yugi. "I am sorry, dear brother!", the smaller boy calls breathlessly and Yami notices the somehow flushed face and wonders what has happened. The younger boy has already skipped into the kitchen, calling out to Yami that he is going to prepare their lunch.

"Oh, and Yami?", he adds, "Valon will join us in half an hour, he was very keen on talking to you."

"Ah, yes", Yami, who has almost forgotten about the earlier meeting with the small flyer, remembers and finishes drying his hair. After he is dressed in comfortable warm clothes and his favourite violet socks, he walks into the kitchen. "Should I help you?", he wants to know, but Yugi waves him off.

"No, no, I am sure today's meal will be wonderful if I do it. I can feel my fingers tingle."

Yugi's fingers' tingling is a certain sign that his whole body is loaded with energy only he is sensing, whether of magical or simply human nature, Yami does not know. He only knows that whenever Yugi's fingers tingle, the day is special to all of them, from the little magician himself to even the horses in their stalls. How this is possible he does not know. When Yugi's fingers tingled the last time, it was a bad sign, for that day Sugoroku had to be taken to the hospital because of his back for the first time. But Yami knows more. It was also the day Leon hid a red rose in Rebecca's saddle. It was the day he saw Pegasus shedding a tear over an old letter he seemed to have found somewhere within his many boxes. It was the day Ishizu found out that Sitah, her camel, was pregnant, and it was the day Bakura passed his last exam at the school he was tested and earned his certificate.

"Did something happen already?", Yami wants to know, half curiously, half nervously.

Yugi throws him a knowing look. "Judging by the way you look at the moment, definitely, and it is about your trapeze training again. But I'm sure you have also seen that it was a very interesting morning for me."

Yami chuckles a little. "Now, define 'interesting' for me. You sure were blushing when you skipped into the house."

With a small smile Yugi empties a pack of noodles into the pot. "I watched Anzu's training today, when I was done with mine. We went for a walk away from the camp, away from everyone. We each took a horse out for a ride. Of course I cannot ride the way she does but I still enjoyed it a lot. Do you know how the birds sing in the trees? How each little plant whispers with the promises of spring? Anzu may not sense things like I do, but she feels nature the same way. I feel close to her, and I know she feels close to me. Thus I lead our horses side by side and leaned over to kiss her."

Hearing this, Yami feels his own smile spreading over his face slowly and a new happiness and pride felt for his little brother fills him.

"Do you know this entirely new magic, Yami?" Yugi looks at him intensely, noodles forgotten as the water slowly beings to boil. "I am almost certain you know it", the smaller boy concludes finally, and Yami cannot help the soft blush on his cheeks. "I will not pry, Yami", his brother assures him, "you know I do not need to do so. But you can be completely open whenever that magical something happens between you and the one you want."

The breathless question escapes before Yami can stop it. "Do you think it will? Do you think he even cares?" Then his eyes widen in horror and he barely refrains from the urge to slap his hand in front of his mouth.

"Do not worry, Yami, I knew anyway." Yugi turns back to the noodles and smiles as he starts to prepare tomatoes for pasta. "And yes, I think so. There is too much between you to go unnoticed."

Yami sighs softly. "I am invited to his house in the evening, because I started a game of asking and telling. It is my turn to tell, and his to ask. I am nervous…but of course I will go."

"I advise you so", Yugi confirms. "I am no fortune teller and the future of this is unknown to me, but I am sure that you will regret whatever chance you do not take now."

Slowly, Yami nods. Then he gives a small laugh. "So, Yugi, what about Rebecca now?"

There is almost a frown in Yugi's voice as he speaks. "I always knew Leon was right for her. Why she does not realise it is beyond me, the flow of energy is so strong even Bakura can feel it." They both snicker at the joke when the door is thrown open.

"Heh, what about the white-haired devil?", Valon wants to know, grinning slightly. "Hey, Yami, great you have some time for me. Wow, Yugi, this smells awesome!"

"Thank you", the younger brother laughs, "And you needn't ask, you are invited to join us for lunch, of course."

"Aw, you're the best", Valon sighs contentedly, sinking into the chair. "How was your training, Yami? Going well? Did that big silent jerk keep you busy again?" He winks a little, then leans back and crosses his arms behind his head.

"You could say that", Yami mutters softly. "Training was nice... But what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Coming to the point straight away, hm?", Valon muses. "I'll have to play along, I guess. Well...you know I like Amelda, don't you? Have been feeling that way ever since I first saw him."

Yami nods, having expected a confession like that, but unable to keep his face from falling a little. Valon recognises the look.

"Yes, I know...he's with Raphael. I found out soon enough. But I found him looking at me as well...and...I just couldn't stop feeling, you know?"

A little more reassured when Yami nods again, he continues. "So, one night during this past month or so, I went to see Raphael, and I confessed. Everything."

There is an oppressive silence while Valon's eyes are lowered to the ground and Yami's have become wide. Yugi speaks up first. "That was very courageous of you," he says softly.

Valon gives him a small smile. "Yeah, well, I guess it's just me – can't keep my mouth shut about things like that. And I felt he had to know. He was grim, but he was sympathetic, telling me I should see Amelda and discuss it with him. But...I couldn't. Things were hard enough as they were...for me, for Raphael – I didn't want to mess up our working relationship completely, so I politely refused and told Raphael that I was okay and that I preferred to refrain from telling Amelda..."

"So you gave up on him?", Yami asks softly, concern showing on his face.

Shrugging, Valon stands and looks around for an empty glass to pour himself some water. He gives a surprised "Oh" when Yugi hands him an already filled glass. "You get better at this stuff every day, man", he mutters, "In a few years you can read minds. Anyway", he continues," you have to say I at least made an effort. It wasn't that easy but I thought I could live with it..." He takes a large gulp of water.

"Until today?", Yami wants to know, anxious about what is to come.

Valon nods, swallowing. "Until today...until today that red-haired fucker came up to me and asked me if I wanted to join them tonight."

Yami's jaw drops. Yugi's eyes widen. They both take a moment to glance at each other, confirming their individual reactions. Their guest meanwhile scratches his neck.

"Don't look like that, guys, I wasn't the one offering...and that's where I am right now. Insanely happy on the one hand because I finally get my chance, indecisive on the other, nervous as hell if they're just going to trick me, embarrassed because I never thought about Raphael that way, humbled because they would care, because they would want me there."

"And you want my, well, our advice?", Yami asks, incredulously.

"Yes, well...", Valon mumbles, "Couldn't think of anyone else...I don't know many people here, you know. Usually I discuss things with Amelda and Raphael because they're my partners."

Unnoticed by Valon, but not by Yugi, Yami's hands fidget at those words. He continues in his normal tone of voice, though.

"You know...I cannot judge this any better than you can, Valon. But I don't think they would trick you. They are honest men. Partners at the circus don't trick each other – we know we have to live together somehow. We don't do things like that to each other. And...try to consider it from this point of view...if you don't go, you'll regret it, won't you?"

Valon bites his lip, but nods in agreement. "That's true...you're right I guess. So, I'm going."

He takes a deep breath. "Wish me luck guys...and the same to you."

Yugi smiles. "Pasta's ready", he announces. "We can eat now."

Both Yami and Valon are silent throughout the meal. Yugi fills the voids in between with light and superficial chatter, seemingly knowing how hard it is for the two of them to make up their resolve.

Valon leaves soon after they have finished the noodles, announcing that he has to go find something suitable to wear, startling Yami terribly with the realisation that he too will have to make preparations.

As soon as the smaller boy is gone, Yami races into his room to find something. The task is not easy, it is not like he has ever had a reason to dress specially before. Yugi follows him and watches him throwing items of clothing out of their shared cupboard.

"You know," Yugi says softly after a while from where he is sitting on the bed, "It's not clothes that will determine your fate tonight. You never wore anything special for him before, did you?"

"I guess not." Yami sighs, contemplatively eyeing a green shirt he is holding in his hands.

"Think this will do? Together with the jeans, maybe?"

Yugi shakes his head with a secretive smile. "The jeans are a good choice but green doesn't suit you at all, brother. Consider your hair! Red, yellow or black will be perfect. Personally, I would go for this."

He lifts up a black shirt with long sleeves made from black, transparent fabric. "It will make you look graceful and bring out the benefits of your age and your hard training. You might want to wash that hair of yours, too." He grins a little. "And I would suggest you tie it up, but I know you are going to refuse."

"You're right about that," Yami mumbles, quickly vanishing into the bathroom. "Thank you, Yugi!"

It takes him an hour to get ready, and the constant agitation makes him a little calmer. However, when the evening still is not nearing, the nervous fidgeting returns until Yugi advises him to read a book.

Yami gives him an incredulous look. "One could come to think you are doing this kind of thing every day, Yugi."

The smaller boy smiles softly. "Meeting with another person is never as difficult as meeting with your actual self. I have to do this all the time to be able to cross my boundaries. You will find yourself in the same situation soon, but it is not going to be about the kind of magic I am training for."

Yami gives him a puzzled look. "Sometimes you confuse me, Yugi." But he smiles and hugs his younger brother.

Three hours later he finally leaves the house, his hands shaking a little as he walks through the ever darkening evening towards the house Seto Kaiba shares with his little brother.

Before he gets the chance to knock, the door opens. Yami stops in his tracks, eyes travelling over the new sight of Seto Kaiba in black jeans and a black buttoned shirt. For a moment there is silence but for a night bird's eerie chant. Then, the taller man beckons him closer with a wave of his hand and as he steps into the warm house, the door closes behind him.