Susan always felt in a different, indefinable way about Peter. When he tells her that he is adopted, that feelings clear up.
Disowner; Narnia and all her delightful creatures aren't mine. Exept for a few characters, later in the story.
Covered Clouds: Thanks. I'll try to keep that opinion up :P
Aminuleen: But that's exactly what I'm trying to do; make Susan feel like shit. Who wouldn't feel like shit when you're doing the right thing but the love of your life can't appreciate it?
KibumiWong: I simply adore your reviews :D. Well, Susan is pissed off, who wouldn't be?
HiddenOperaAngel: Ah well, you'll have to do it with that. It indeed maybe was a bit – crazy, but in some way I kinda tried to show that Peter of course has his physical weak spots, like any other guy. Peter is always pictured as rather untouchable, sometimes even like in devine. But he's just an ordinary guy, and although it might not have been quite right for the type of story; Peter's human too. Actually, that's what the whole Narnia-thing is about, if you think of it that way. But thanks anyway.
V. In which Susan's attempt to be the hero fails terribly, and everything goes wrongwrongwrong
"Where were we going again?" Edmund asked whiney. They had been plodded through the snow for fifteen minutes now.
"To see mr Tumnus!" Lucy was so happy her brothers and sisters were here now. Even Susan. She had forgiven her sister, after all Susan did it for the right reasons. Lucy wished Peter could forgive her too, since he obviously hadn't. Edmund obviously didn't care about any of it.
"Here we are!" Lucy said, throwing a happy look at the door of mr Tumnus' cave. Peter looked at his little sister. It alarmed him, the way her happy eyes turned to terror, the way her broad smile faded.
"No!" Lucy started running towards the door, that hung crooked in the opening. Peter ran after her, Susan and Edmund on his heels. Quietly Lucy stepped into her friend's house. Everything was turned upside down. She had to try very hard to keep the tears in, especially when she saw his favourite cup, shattered on the floor. Peter layed an arm over his little sister's shoulders.
"This place is cold. There hasn't been lived here for days!" he said.
"Not since the last time I was here," Lucy said, grabbing a piece of the cup and holding it tightly.
"What's this?" Edmund walked up to the table. There was a note lying on it. He held it in the light of the moon, and the others gathered around him, "The Faun Tumnus is under arrest and awaiting trial in charge of high treason against Her Imperial Majesty Jadis; Queen of Narnia, Chatelaine of Cair Paravel, Empress of the Lone Islands etc. Also for comforting Her Majesty's enemies, harbouring spies, and above all; fraternizing with Humans. Signed by Maugrim, Captain of the Secret Police. Long live the Queen!" Edmund lowered the paper, "Well, she certainly knows how to get rid of ugly business," he said. Peter sighed.
"I don't think I'm going to like this place,"
"No, that's why I really think we should go now," Susan said. How in god's name did they end up here?
"Who is this queen, Lucy?" Edmund asked. Lucy sighed annoyed.
"This, Edmund, is the White Witch I told you about. She made an enchantment over the whole country. So it is always winter, yet never christmas."
"I wonder if there's any point in going on," Peter said, "It's getting colder and more dangerous every minute, and we have nothing to eat. Why don't we just go home."
"But we can't!" Lucy exclaimed, "We cant 'just go home'! It's all on my account that mr Tumnus is captured by the White Witch! Fraternizing with humans," she pointed at the piece of paper in Edmund's hand, "I'm that human! She must've found out he helped me. We must try and rescue him."
"If he's arrested for being with a human, there's not much we can do," Edmund said, "What do you think, Susan?"
Peter wished he was the one to do that. Asking Susan what to do. But he couldn't. He felt so lonely right now. Lucy was too little for reasonable talk, Edmund turned into a stanger a long time ago, and now that he couldn't even trust Susan anymore...
"I don't want to go a step further," Susan said, "And I wish we had never come. But I think Lucy is right. We must try to do something for mr Whatever-his-name-is."
Susan felt so bad about this. Especially because she realized who had betrayed him. She screwed up.
"I agree," Edmund said, and the tone in his voice surprised Peter, "But I'm worried about having no food."
"Why don't we go back and get something from the larder?" Peter said.
"Well, there's no certainty we'll get back here once were out of it," Lucy said, "You do remember that the first time you checked, there was nothing there. I think we have to go on."
"So do I," said Susan.
"Right," Peter said, and they just started walking in some direction. Edmund and Lucy walked together in the front, Peter behind them and Susan in the back. After a long silence in which Susan kept hoping that Peter would talk to her and at one point even wished she would have stayed with the Witch, she walked up to Peter herself.
"Excuse me sir, if you're not still to high to talk to me," she said. Peter turned around with a sigh.
"Okay, okay, what is it?" he said, annoyed about her sarcasm but relieved that she at least was talking to him.
"Look, we don't even know where this faun's imprisoned," she said. Well, I do, but you don't, she thought.
"No-"
"And another thing, how do we know he is in the right? How do we know this queen's really such a terrible witch?"
"That's something I've been considering all this time," Edmund said, while turning back to them.
"Yes, but the faun saved Lucy," Peter said.
"Yeah, so he said," Edmund said, "But how do we know?"
"Peter!" Lucy stood by a tree, about seven meters from them.
"What is it?" Peter asked.
"Shh," Lucy said, "Listen." Peter didn't hear anything. Edmund did. Very softly, from really rather close...
"Psst,"
Edmund turned slowly and soundless around, and looked into the wood. A little bird sat down on a branch.
"Psst,"
Edmund straightened his back, and his jaw dropped.
"Did that bird just psst us?" he asked stunned.
"No," Lucy said, "It was that beaver."
They all turned around and saw a beaver sitting behind a pile of snow.
"Psst," he did, "This way."
Edmund started laughing loudly.
"A beaver!" he said, laughing it away.
"Shht! Be quiet!" the beaver said, and Edmund stopped laughing, "Further in!"
Peter looked at Susan and forgot for a few seconds that he was actually angry at her.
"It wants us to follow it!" Lucy said.
"The question is, should we?" Peter replied.
"Problem?" the beaver asked softly.
"Not to seem rude, mr Beaver, but we don't know wether we should trust you or not," Peter said. The beaver walked up to Lucy and gave her a white piece of cloth. Her jaw dropped.
"It's my handkerchief! The one I gave to mr Tumnus when he was crying!" she said. The beaver nodded.
"We must go further in. We're not safe here," and when he started walking again, they decided to follow him. They walked for quite a time, until they finally reached a small valley with a frozen lake. In the middle of the lake, stood a dam.
"What a lovely dam!" Lucy said sincerely.
"Oh, merely a trifle," Beaver said. When they got down, the door went open and a female beaver stormed out.
"Beaver, is that you? I've been worried sick! If I find you've been out with badger again, I-" she stopped when she saw the four siblings.
"Oh, those aren't badgers!" they heard her muttering to herself, "To think that I would live to see this day!" she turned to Beaver, "Look at my fur! You couldn't give me ten minutes warning?"
"Oh, I'd have given a week, if I thought it would've helped!"
The siblings chuckled. Mrs Beaver ignored him.
"Come inside, and we'll see if I can get you some food," she glanced at mr Beaver, "and some civilized company."
So five minutes later they were inside. Lucy, Peter and Susan with mr Beaver at the table, Edmund on the stairs.
"Isn't there anything we can do to help Tumnus?" Peter asked.
"They'll have taken him to the Witch's house. You know what they say," Beaver said, "There's few that go into those gates, that ever come out again."
"Fish-n-Chips!" mrs Beaver called, and she put plates with food in front of the siblings. Thankful they began to eat. Mrs Beaver sat down next to Lucy, "But there's hope, dear. Lots of hope!"
"Oh yeah, there's a right bit more than hope!" mr Beaver said. He bowed forwards, "Aslan is on the move."
In some way it made the Pevensies feel better than they had ever felt. Even Edmund couldn't stop a smile from creeping onto his face. He stood up from his place on the stairs.
"Who's Aslan?" he asked smiling.
"Who's Aslan? Haha! You cheeky little blighter," mr Beaver laughed, and Edmund's smile faded. The other Pevensies stared at mr Beaver, and mrs Beaver poked him in his side. He looked up at the siblings and then his jaw dropped.
"You don't know, do ya?"
"Well, we haven't exactly been here very long," Peter said.
"Oh, he's only the king of the whole wood," mr Beaver replied mocking, "The top geezer. The real King of Narnia."
"He's been away for a long while," mrs Beaver said.
"But he's just got back!" mr Beaver added, "And he's waitin' for you near the Stone Table!"
"He's waiting for us?" Lucy asked rather stunned.
"You're bloomin' joking!" he turned to mrs Beaver, "They don't even know about the prophecy!"
"Well, then..." mrs Beaver said encouraging, pointing at the siblings. Mr Beaver sighed.
"Look. Aslans return, Tumnus' arrest, the Secret Police; it's all happening because of you!"
"Great, you're blaming us," Susan said, not sure if she could handle all the guilt.
"No! Not blaming! No, thanking you!" mrs Beaver said, with a happy flicker in her little eyes.
"There's a prophecy," mr Beaver said, "When Adam's flesh and Adam's bone, sits at Cair Paravel in throne, the evil time will be over and done."
"You know, that doesn't really rhyme," Edmund said.
"Yeah, I know it doesn't, but you're kinda missing the point!" mr Beaver said. Mrs Beaver rested a little paw on her husband's shoulder.
"It has long been foretold that two Sons of Adam and two Daughters of Eve will defeat the White Witch and restore peace to Narnia," she said. Peter threw Susan a nasty look, as if to say that this was all her fault.
"And you think we're the ones?" he asked unpleasantly surprised. Mr Beaver jumped up.
"You'd better be, cause Aslan's already fitted out your army!" he exclaimed.
"Our army?" Lucy exclaimed, too stunned to do anything else but repeat mr Beaver's words. Peter turned to Edmund.
"Give us a moment to consider this," he said. Mr Beaver nodded and Peter and Edmund went outside.
"Mum sent us away so we wouldn't get caught up in a war," Peter said, unsure what to do. Edmund sighed heavily.
"What is it, Ed?"
"I don't like that beaver,"
"He's nice!"
"No, he's arrogant."
"He is not! He actually told me he likes you,"
"He's a beaver,"
"So?"
"Beaver's aren't supposed to say anything!"
Peter catched his eye.
"What is your problem?"
"I don't know," Edmund said sincerely, "I'm just frustrated."
"About what?"
"Everything that's happening. However much I'd like to see this war if I can't see the one in London, it's enough Peter. I think we should go,"
"You're right," Peter said, and they went back in.
"Although it all sounds very exciting, I think you've made a mistake," Edmund said to mr Beaver, "We're not heroes!"
"We're from Finchley," Peter said, as if people from Finchley couldn't be heroes. He stood up again, "Thank you for your hospitality. But we really have to go."
"No! You can't just leave!" there was unhidden panic in mr Beaver's voice.
"He's right!" Lucy said, "We have to help mr Tumnus!"
"It's out of our hands," Peter said, "I'm sorry. But it's time the four of us were getting home. Sue?"
He turned around. Susan was gone. Edmund raised an eyebrow.
"Sue?" Lucy jumped off her chair and walked a circle through the room.
"What, she wasn't with you?" mrs Beaver asked.
"No, she was here!" Edmund replied.
"No! She excused herself and followed you two!" mrs Beaver exclaimed panicing. Peter turned to Edmund.
"Oh, I'm going to kill that girl," he said aggressively.
"You may not have to," all eyes were on mr Beaver. His gaze pierced Peter's eyes, "Has Susan ever been to Narnia before?"
Susan was climbing up a hill.
"God, I wish I had brought my furcoat!" she said to herself, almost bursting out in tears. She tried to remember when she had decided to go to the Witch. It was so cold. Mr Tumnus, mr Tumnus, mr Tumnus, her mind kept repeating. She tried to hold the picture of his house, turned completely upside down because she had said his name.
"I'm going to save him. And then Lucy will hug me, and Edmund will compliment me, and Peter... Peter will see he can trust me," Susan promised herself outloud, "That I can still do some good in this world. I've made a mistake, and I'm going to make it alright. And he will love me for it."
She chuckled at that wonderful thought and looked behind her. She could hear voices coming her way.
"There's no turning back now," Susan said, "I must be strong. Peter will see I'm worth it."
The determination pumped adrenaline in her blood, and kept giving her the strength to climb further in the cold. Until she finally made it to a huge frozen lake, with in the middle of it unmistakable the Witch's castle. Susan cursed. Since she fell through it once as a little girl, Susan was terrified of ice.
"Where is she?" she heard behind her in the distance.
"Shit!" she muttered, and she cautiously stepped onto the ice. She shivered when she heard a soft crack. I can't do this, she thought, I can't. But she did. For Tumnus. For Lucy. For Peter... Susan sighed relieved when she had finally made it to the high doors.
"SUSAN!" she heard Lucy scream. She watched the silhouettes for a while, and then went in.
"SUSAN!" Lucy screamed at the little silhouette of her sister, in the far distance on the frozen lake, "COME BACK!"
"Shh, they'll hear you!" mr Beaver said.
"What is she doing?" Edmund exclaimed. Peter panted aggressively. Susan HAD to come back, now! He started running, but almost got slammed to the ground by mr Beaver, who held onto his coat.
"Get off me!" he exclaimed frustrated.
"You're playing into her hands!" mr Beaver said pent up.
"We can't just let her go!" Edmund said.
"She's our sister!" Lucy added.
"She's the bait!" mr Beaver said, getting more frustrated by the second, "The Witch wants all four of you!"
"Why?" Edmund asked.
"To stop the prophecy from coming true!" mr Beaver was really stressed right now, "To kill ya!"
The siblings looked up at the castle. The heavy doors slammed shut, meaning Susan had gotten in. What have you done, Sue, Peter thought, This is all your fault.
"This is all your fault!" Lucy yelled at Peter, as if she had read his thoughts. Peter turned around to face his little sister.
"My fault?"
"None of this would have happened if you had listened to her in the first place!" Lucy yelled.
"Oh, so she knew this would happen," Peter said mocking.
"She didn't know what would happen," Lucy said, "Which is why we should have listened to her while we still could!"
"Stop it!" Edmund exclaimed, "This isn't going to help Susan!"
"He's right," mr Beaver said, "Only Aslan can help your sister now."
"Then take us to him," Peter said, throwing a last look at the castle before leaving with the others.
The Witch's castle was terrifying. The icy courtyard Susan was now in, was full of what looked like huge statues. She looked behind her at the doors. Was there a turning back? No. No ofcourse there was no turning back. She had already come this far. She couldn't give up now. But was she doing the right thing? Susan felt like she had fallen into a foggy dream. One last time she threw a look at the high doors where she had just come from, and then walked up to the stairs at the other side of the courtyard. Okay, now let's think. Mr Tumnus is probably in the dungeon. Where am I supposed to enter the dungeon? She thought, while she stepped over a large stone that layed widely across the path that led through the courtyard. Suddenly it came alive, and Susan screamed for King and Country.
"Be still stranger, or you'll never move again," Susan was on the cold floor now, with the living statue that now appeared a huge grey wolf on top of her, "Who are you?"
"I- I'm Susan," she wheezed with terror in her voice. She was so horrified that she couldn't even lie about her name.
The wolf's growled.
"What are you doing here?"
Susan's brains were frozen, yet running on full speed.
"I- I ..."
The wolf took a good look at her, and before she could even think of something, he got off her.
"My apologies, fortunate favourite of the queen!" he passed her while she got up, "Or else, not so fortunate. This way."
"No, no – I think I should go,"
"I think you shouldn't. This way,"
Susan saw no other choice, and followed him up a stair, into a large hall. At the other side, there was this huge throne, made of ice.
"Wait here," the wolf said, and he left. Susan didn't wait. As soon as he was out of sight, she turned around and started running as softly as she could.
"Where are you going?" the sudden presence of the queen's voice made Susan feel like someone splashed cold water in her face. She froze and turned around as slowly as she could.
"I must go, Your Majesty," was the only thing she managed to say. The queen smiled an icy smile, and alarmed a feeling in Susan's stomach. A horrible, yet unrecognizable feeling.
"I thought you were here to be a princess," the queen said. She sat down in her throne.
"N-no, Your Majesty, I just came to tell you that I don't have any interest in-"
"Tell me, Susan," the queen cut her off, "are your brothers deaf?"
There fell a short silence in which Susan wondered what she meant.
"No," she answered somewhat scared and a little curious. She felt four little words come up in the back of her mind.
"And your sister. Is she – unintelligent?"
"Just a little young, but-"
"Then how DARE you come alone?" the queen yelled, standing up with her wand in her hand. Susan took it back with horror in her face. Four little words, in the back of her mind.
I screwed up – again.
"I tried!" she lied.
"Susan, I ask so little of you," the queen said. It was terrifying.
"They just don't listen to me!" Susan said. Well, at least I'm not lying with that one, Susan thought to herself.
"You couldn't even do that!"
"I did bring them halfway! They're at the little house at the dam, with the beavers!" It was out before she could help it. Susan mentally slapped herself. What was she doing? Trying to do something good, she only caused more problems. Why can't I just die right now? Susan thought. The queen took a moment to consider her confession. She glanced at her dwarf.
"Well. I suppose you're not a total loss then, are you?" she concluded, sitting back down. She turned to the dwarf, "Bring our new Princess to her quarters, will you?"
"I told you just a second ago, I don't have any interest in the princess-thing," Susan said sincerely, suddenly aware of the stupidity of her thoughts, "Please, bring me to my family!"
The queen ignored her, but the dwarf took a knife and forced her to a door. Susan felt the sharp point through her thin blouse and sighed lost.
"Maugrim!" the queen yelled with a strong, icy voice. The wolf walked up to the queen, throwing Susan a terrifying smirk, "You know what to do."
Susan watched in terror how Maugrim called his wolfs and ran into the darkness of the night.
Oh no, Susan thought, this is the end.