Okay, I KNOW I haven't updated in forever, but you know what? I bet it's somehow your fault. I'm blaming YOU! WAHAHAHAHA! Yeah, whatever. It was actually because I'm Kalilamae's beta. FEEL MY WRATH!

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In the convention, Itachi had an unrelated thought. Why did Kakashi need to be the supervision if there are so many adults here?

But who cares about what Itachi's cute demented little mind was currently thinking when Neji was undergoing... the Sasuke Fangirl Club Entrance Ceremony, also known as the evil hazing ritual of HELL.

Neji gulped nervously. His first task was to steal something interesting out of Sasuke's room. Lucky for him, Sasuke was not around. Unlucky for him, Sasuke's stuff was not very interesting besides a titanium safe with little rainbow bubble letter stickers spelling out 'SASUKE' in a wiggly line. While he really didn't want Sasuke to be king, Neji decided he would overthrow him. Little did he know, he would soon note allowed.

Clambering into the window of Sasuke's room in the Uchiha complex, he snatched up the safe and dashed back Sasuke's Fangirl Club base, a rundown building that was at first sight, abandoned. Sakura waited by the entrance for him.

"Here." he said bluntly.

"Hm... good!" Sakura said, "I'll get our forces to get this open. In the meantime, you can sign the contract."

Neji followed her into the building only to be blinded by 10,000,000 pictures of Sasuke's smirking face. The very floors seemed to be carpeted by article's of Sasuke's clothing, and the walls smeared with the offerings of blood to the Uchiha god, Uchiha Adumi, supposedly the best looking Uchiha of them all.

He quivered as he passed the hoardes of fangirls. Not all of them were citizens of Konoha; rock, rain, mist, even girls from sound were gathered in this dark building.

Finally the walk ended as Sakura prepared to open a creepy white door. "Alright Neji. Are you ready to sign the contract?"

"... yes," he said solemnly.

They stepped into the room. It was... a bright white dressing room? The room had was divided with white lockers. It had two doors leading out, the one he came through, and a suspicious black one.

"Change into these," Sakura stated, passing him a hooded robe the same color as Sasuke's shirt. Over the heart was an Uchiha fan.

"You can't be serious," Neji growled.

"You want to go to the archives don't you?" She asked sweetly.

"Fine..." he grumbled.

Sakura went to the other side of the lockers and changed into a similar (though tighter) version of the robes while Neji slid into his. Then she led him through the black door.

As he stepped in, his eyes widened in horror.

It was basically a dim round room with a beautiful black altar in the center. Three steps led up to the alter, all of the having footmarks apparently made from two of Sasuke's shoes. The footmarks on the third step left indentions on the floor similar to a bowl. On the altar was an ebony dagger. The blade was long and curved, the hilt intricately carved into a likeness of Sasuke. Next to the dagger was the contract, a parchment sheet tied shut with a crimson ribbon.

"What's the knife for?" Neji nervously queried.

"Oh, you have to sign the contract in blood," Sakura said casually.

His eyes widened as she walked to the altar, leaving him standing by himself. He turned to leave, thoroughly freaked out, only to find the door was locked.

"No turning back, Neji," She smiled sadistically, her eyes covered by a dark shadow.

With Kisame

"Geez! How am I supposed to know how many fangirls Itachi has!" Kisame told himself, "I didn't think he had any... especially in Konoha seeing as how he's basically known as a crazed psycho murderer and most people have never seen him. Wait... Konoha. Why aren't I being arrested? I'm a missing-nin sitting on a bench in middle of Konohagakure. I'm wearing my Akatsuki cloak and everything! I guess Konoha is lamer than I thought."

Then he got an idea. "I bet they aren't verifying these numbers... Hehehe... Hahahaha! BWAHAHAHAHA!"

Some dork walked by and threw a wad of paper at Kisame's poor blue head. "Stop talking to yourself, freak!"

Kisame glared and grabbed his Samehade.

SKLORTCH!

The kid deserved it.

You must really want to know what's happening with Neji, right? Well, you first will know what's up with Gaara! Haha, Yeah!

Gaara walked up to the time machine. Kakashi might not have many fangirls now because of , but as a child... who knew how many there were...

"Um... here goes..." said Gaara, closing his eyes and pressing one of the buttons tentatively. Suddenly he flashed through many places in time. One showed himself with his siblings, some guy with sunglasses he saw at the convention, and some creep with a ponytail trapped in a box. Another flashed to Neji petting his kitten in the future. At last it stopped in Konoha with Kakashi and a red haired girl sacrificing an Uchiha in the back of an alley. Nobody there could see Gaara.

"Hey, Kashi-kun, let's get Adumi next!" said the red haired girl.

"Uh-uh, we've got to follow the schedule, Rin." Chibi Kakashi said crossly. (aaaaw!)

How long has he worn that mask? thought Gaara, not giving the bleeding guy on the ground as much as a glance.

"Yah, who's next?" the girl, apparently named Rin asked.

"Heh, Obito is. I can't wait." Chibi Kakashi said.

"Yeah, it'll be great to finally kill him."

Then a guy with goggles walked in. "Hey guys! Watcha' doin' in this secluded alley?"

"Er... nothing, Obito! Nothing at all!" Rin said.

"Oh Rin! I could never hope for a more wonderful and trustworthy friend than you!" cried Obito.

"Hm," hmed Kakashi.

"But you... I hate you. If I were ever given the opportunity to save your life, I wouldn't do it. I would save RIN though. 'Cause she's wonderful and trustworthy!" Then Obito stuck out his tongue disdainfully.

Well, I guess Rin counts as a Kakashi fangirl... thought Gaara, spotting the picture of him sticking out of her pocket. Well, that's one down, a lot to go. Gaara then took out a pencil and his handy notebook and put in a single tally mark.

Finally back with Neji

Kneeling on the third step she bowed her head. "O great Adumi, accept this new member into our Sisterhood. I know not his intentions, but if he means well for your beloved family member, I am sure you will grant him passage into your heart."

"Come here Neji," Sakura said with false kindness.

He walked forward in fear. What was going on! Was she going to kill him? He left his weapons in the other room and Sakura was pretty vicious.

"Hold out your hand," she continued.

He lifted his sweaty shaking palm to her. She raised the dagger and sliced the flesh of his palm.

Both watched as the footstep/bowl filled with his blood. Then she healed his hand with chakra.

"Ok Neji, lets get this signed..." Sakura cheered, passing him the contract and a quill she got from seemingly nowhere.

"Um... this is a feather." Neji said plainly.

"Well, duh. You sign it in blood. Your blood, actually. Just dip the feather in and sign."

He scanned over the contract. It basically told him to be loyal to the fangirls and be good to Sasuke. And to study the Book of Adumi.

"Whatever..." he sighed and dipped the quill in his blood.

Even with a feather, he wrote in flowing cursive the was more like calligraphy than anything else.

"Well, thank you Neji! You're an official Sasuke fangirl! Remember to always have your ID which will be given to you in the front room by Takuya Ki along with your Book of Adumi and your outfit for meetings. You have to wear the robes as long as you hang out in the building. Once you get your ID, you can go to the archives. Go on!" Sakura smiled as though he hadn't just signed himself into a cult with his blood.

"Um... sure..." Neji muttered, awestruck.

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Alright, that was weird. Adumi does not have a Japanese meaning; I checked. So don't go looking.

jgc123: Thanks for the help on writing that one, Kalila.

Kalilamae: np.

jgc123: Eh, well... I don't suppose you could help me with the next one?

Kalilamae: Sure, whatever. It's not like I wrote a lot. I just didpart ofthe section with Gaara and part of the Neji thing.

jgc123: LOOK! A BOLOGNA SANDWICH!

Kalilamae: Huh? Where! Ok, enough references for one ending... talky... thingy... whatever this thing is called.

jgc123: Fine...