The Shadow Lands were, if anything, even worse than they had been the first time Ari was here. He drew his sword as a few tiny demons revealed themselves, but Stan was completely unconcerned. He stared straight ahead as he walked, appearing to not even notice they were slowly gaining followers.

Star twittered. "And you claimed I would reveal our location," she teased.

"Shut up," Stan said through his teeth. He clearly noticed. After a few seconds, he went on. "I seem to have miscalculated exactly how much of a stir my return would cause."

"You think?" Ari muttered insolently. Stan didn't bother to glare; possibly he didn't even hear.

Suddenly, a high-pitched voice squealed, "Ari!" and the boy found himself nearly knocked to the ground by a familiar demoness in blonde pigtails.

"Uh…hi, Delilah," Ari greeted her uncertainly as he attempted to extricate himself from her grasp.

"Hey, you, girl!" Stan yelled. "Get off my slave!"

Delilah let go to glare disrespectfully up at Stan. "Huh uh, Shadow King," she contradicted him. "He's my slave, now. Aren't you, Ari?"

Ari shifted his weight uncomfortably and tried to restrain his laughter at the sight of Delilah, who came barely up to Stan's knees, challenging him over Ari's ownership. "What's this little brat talking about?" Stan asked suspiciously.

"This is Delilah," Ari explained. "She's the one who saved me from Legion the first time."

"Yup, that's me!" she announced, thrilled. "Delilah Trinidad!"

"You are the eldest?" Star asked when Stan seemed more inclined to simply glower menacingly. Ari glanced between the two and wondered what Star meant. He thought it was kind of strange that the name Trinidad would still be around after three hundred years.

The little girl nodded happily. "As of yesterday, as a matter of fact." She adopted an overly exaggerated frown. "My poor elder brother met a horrible, horrible accident involving his throat and a kitchen knife. But it was his own fault for letting his guard down."

Stan laughed at the look on Ari's face then turned back to his niece. "Do you have any younger siblings?"

"Just the twins."

"My advice to you is to kill them now before they become a threat."

Delilah grinned. "Oh, I fully intend to. But Mom says I have to let them live until they're at least ten years old, so they have a chance to fight back."

"Why?"

The girl shrugged.

"You kill off your family members?" Ari asked quietly.

Star put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "It is their way. Let it not concern you."

"That's how the name gets passed down," Stan clarified. "The eldest inherits it. Any remaining siblings make something up or do without."

"Actually, it kind of sucks," Delilah said, wrinkling her nose. "There's only four Houses left now, so everyone got together and decided we should stop killing each other off for a while."

"Where's the fun in that?"

Again, Delilah shrugged. "But now you're back," she announced happily. "You can make them leave things the way they were."

Stan shook his head. "No, I'm not back. I'm just passing through. I still have the mortal realms to conquer as soon as I finish with certain traitors. You wouldn't know anything about a ghost butler and a mind flayer would you?"

Delilah thought for a minute. "No…I don't think so. But there's been a lot of activity over in the Necropolis for some reason. I snuck out to go see, and the ghosts were in an absolute uproar around the tombs."

Stan's eyes lit up. "Strange…" he muttered, though he sounded like he had expected it.

"Yeah. They said something about Evil King Mortimer's construct-"

"What about it?" Stan asked suddenly. Delilah jumped at the threatening tone.

"It had been destroyed or something," she finished.

Stan snarled viciously. "Damn it! I wanted to kill him. Oh, well. Let's go, slave!"

Ari sighed regretfully as he waved to Delilah and followed Stan. It had been great while it lasted.

Star flicked her wings and made a short, soothing noise. "Do not let their incomprehensible ways concern you, young one," she said, misinterpreting his expression.

Ari decided not to correct her. Instead, he smiled and replied, "I try not to. Uh, hey, Master Stan?"

Stan glanced over his shoulder, but said nothing. Ari took this as the signal to continue. "If the name gets past down to the oldest child, how can Delilah be a Trinidad if you are?"

The Shadow King pondered that for a second, then waved his hand dismissively. "Probably one of my sisters got it after I disappeared. Who cares?"

"You had sisters?"

"Three of them, as a matter of fact. Actually, four; one was older than me, and she got killed off by my brother before I was old enough to remember her."

Ari looked at the ground and decided he would rather not find out anything else about Stan's childhood.

Looking around at their entourage, Star shuddered slightly. "Why do they behave so? I am perhaps incorrect, but I do not believe this is normal."

Stan shrugged. "It's been three hundred years since I was last here, and there's been no one in my place. Not counting the last time, that is. They couldn't sense me because I was in Ari's shadow that time." He grinned. "Actually, it's kind of funny; I'm a probably a bedtime story come to terrifying life for most of these creatures."

Ari moved a little closer to Stan; the creatures' silent gaze was becoming unnerving. "So," he began. "Do you actually rule here?"

"Eh…not as such. No one rules anything around here. But if I were so inclined, my word would be law by merit of the fact that no one else is strong enough to challenge me. But I'd rather just take over the mortal realms." He glanced sidelong at Ari and grinned. "Demons don't make good slaves."

Ari blinked. Had Stan just… "Was that a compliment?" he suddenly felt compelled to ask. Stan did not give compliments often and never out of the blue like that.

"Don't let it go to your head, Ari," Stan answered auspiciously. "You're still a worthless, insolent slave."

"Be pleasant, dark one," Star laughed.

"I don't have to," Stan informed her, the picture of pretension.

Despite the dark and dangerous circumstances, Ari practically skipped with joy. It almost felt like "old times", when he and the group had gone adventuring to subjugate fake Evil Kings. Although he didn't think he would ever miss those days when they started, by the time it was over, he was almost sorry. Even with his shadow possessed by an Evil King who ordered him around all the time, he had had fun. He missed adventuring.

Now, he was on an adventure again; Stan was actually being almost nice to him and calling him by his name for the first time; he had a two new friends; life was good. He was going to be sorry when this one was over, too. Maybe he'd convince Stan that they needed to take over the world. Actually, he would rather become a Hero like Rosalyn, but he doubted Stan would ever go for that. One thing was certain, though: he did not want to go back to being ordinary. It was too boring.

The sky grew darker, and their nightmarish retinue began to drop away. A strip of red appeared on the horizon, and the sky above it flashed with lighting. Ari wasn't paying much attention until Stan smacked him on the arm. "Look at that," he said, nodding toward the storm. He almost sounded awed.

"Yes…?" Ari said uncertainly.

"That's a once in a lifetime opportunity over there, Ari," Stan told him. "This is the first time I've ever seen it."

"…The rain?"

Stan smacked him again, slightly harder. "Not the rain!" he announced in exasperation. "I've seen plenty of rain! I'm talking about the fact that it's over the Necropolis. It never rains there. Literally. I think the last time it rained in the Necropolis was…about fifty years before I was born."

"Wow…" Ari replied quietly. Now, he understood Stan's reverence.

Star shuddered after a while. "I do not like this. It is dead here."

"It is not dead here," Stan argued. "It's just dark."

"And dead," Star continued.

Stan huffed. "Well, it's home, alright? You get used to it after a while." Although he tried to defend the place, he had gotten used to the mortal realms. The Shadow Lands, the place he had lived for eight years and continued to consider home for another three hundred or so, did feel dead to him, now. Being back here, he found he missed the green grass and sunlight. Especially, the sun. Shadows needed light to exist, after all; and while Shadow Demons did not as such, he felt more alive in the sun than he ever had anywhere else.

Not that he would ever say that aloud. Especially when there was a chance it might get back to the Hero woman. She taunted him enough about getting lonely so easily.

I'd like to see her stay alone in a bottle for three hundred years and not come out of it craving some kind of companionship. Well, something to talk to besides myself, anyway…herself…

"Then that is the River of Blood, yes?" Star sighed, gratuitously interrupting what was becoming a very uncomfortable train of thought.

"'River of Blood'?" Ari asked, torn between doubt and disgust.

"Yes," Stan confirmed. "It is exactly what you're thinking. The river is blood."

Ari stared at the red line, slowly approaching, though not slow enough. "And we have to cross it?"

Stan grinned that obnoxiously evil grin that meant he had just come up with an especially evil idea for what to do to his poor slave next. "Well, there is a bridge, but maybe I should make you swim it since you seem so eager."

"Dark one, you are bad," Star accused.

"No, I'm evil. There's a difference."

"You are not serious…?" she asked as though she dreaded hearing the answer.

"Oh, no," Ari said heavily. "He's very serious."

Star squealed and narrowed her eyes. "That is most unpleasant. I will not tolerate it."

Stan scoffed. "Oh, yeah? Try and stop me."

He stopped. Star looked at him; her expression was one of amusement. "Do you truly wish me to?" she asked slowly.

Stan glared. The memory of his ignoble defeat at her hands still burned, and he fully intended to make her pay for it later. For the moment, however, he simply snarled something most unpleasant and continued walking, or rather stalking, towards the Necropolis. Star squeezed her eyes closed in an imitation of the expression used by a very satisfied cat and made a short, soft, and high-pitched cymbal crash. Apparently, this was her version of a victorious whoop. Stan growled but did not try to continue the disagreement.

The river was still barely visible on the horizon when the three travelers saw someone or something walking towards them. Stan surreptitiously nudged Ari, who quickly understood that he needed to be ready to draw his sword. He noticed faint sparks play across Stan's fingers, and beyond him, Star's light increased slightly. The boy wanted to ask what it was, but he wasn't sure he should say anything. The person, or whatever it was, seemed far enough away that it shouldn't be able to hear them, yet Stan had chosen to remain inconspicuous. Clearly, he thought it would be able, and did not want it to.

Star and Stan both seemed to know what they were about to face, and Ari felt out of the loop, something he wasn't used to. He always knew what Stan had in mind because the Evil King liked to announce his grand plans to his slave, as he was the only one listening, more often than not. They were expecting a fight; that much was obvious. Ari decided that was all he needed to know for now. He would figure out what was going on soon enough.

As they drew closer together, the lone traveler waved cheerily enough. Rather than relaxing, which Ari wouldn't have expected anyway, Stan seemed to grow even more tense. The newcomer appeared to be a perfectly normal young man, slightly older than Ari. He had none of the features shared by Stan's kin, such as yellow eyes and pointed ears. He seemed perfectly human, if a bit too pale. On his shoulder sat a strange monkey-like creature. It chattered in a very simian manner.

"Who are you?" Stan demanded.

"I am Daylar," the man answered. "And this is my pet Simmurg, Chit."

Chit grinned and made a rude noise with its lips.

Stan narrowed his eyes. "What do you want?" he asked suspiciously.

Daylar opened his hands and held them out slightly, as though to show he had no weapons. He shook his head. "Nothing really. Only to ask you not to leave the Shadow Lands."

Stan raised an eyebrow. "Why not?"

"Because our Lady doesn't want you to interfere."

"Natasha sent you!" Stan yelled.

"Of course," Daylar answered. He chuckled and grinned to reveal his fangs. "What else did you think a vampire would be doing on this side of the river?" He spoke some words that no one understood and pointed to ground. Chit jumped down from his shoulder and chattered. Its features blurred, and it grew until it was even taller than Stan. It had massive claws, now, and teeth the size and sharpness of daggers. It roared.

Ari didn't need Stan to yell for him to draw his sword. The only vampire he had ever fought before was the Vampire Evil King, and that fight had not actually progressed to the point of killing him. They circled each other warily for a time while the boy tried to come up with a plan. All the stories said that a vampire could only be killed with a wooden stake; Ari hoped a metal sword was close enough as jabbed in the general area of Daylar's heart. The vampire back-flipped away to land in a crouch, from which he lunged for the boy's throat. The entire maneuver took about two seconds, and Ari had not yet caught his balance. Daylar nearly grabbed him.

At the same time Ari was battling Daylar, Stan switched to his shadow form and slithered underneath Chit. He had never seen a Simmurg before, but he had read about them. He had even considered getting one, but the book said they were stupid creatures. As he watched Chit look around in confusion, he was grateful he had never gotten one.

Simmurgs were strong and vicious to anyone who wasn't the master. Although they only have magic insofar as it pertains to changing their size, they don't really need it. Physically, they are unrivaled by most other creatures, with the possible exception of a fully-grown and enraged bull elephant. They do have one weakness, but their eyes are so small that's it becomes very difficult to exploit.

They were magic resistant, which meant that spells would be no good. Unfortunately, that also meant that when Stan drew power to his hand and punched the creature, he did nothing save alert it to his location. Cursing his lack of an actual weapon, he sank to the ground and shot beneath it a second time, then resumed his true form. Before he could do anything else, however, Star unleashed her attack.

When the twin battles began, Star increased her light to about twice its normal wattage and began gathering all her power into a little ball as she had done to Stan once before. This power could be a very potent, very fatal attack if she wanted it to be. But Star was a creator; she did as little damage as possible, even to her enemies. As Daylar nearly caught Ari, and Chit rounded on Stan, Star unleashed all her pent up power. The two villains were thrown several dozen feet.

Stan narrowed his eyes and turned. "I could have handled that."

"I couldn't have," Ari offered.

Master and slave glanced at each other and came to a mutual decision. "Aim for its eyes," Stan said. "They're strong, but stupid. Just be quick, and don't waste any movements. If you get yourself killed, I'll resurrect your corpse and kill you again."

Ari gave a hastily worried smile as he traded places and opponents with Stan. As the second round began, he heard Stan yell something to Star about not interrupting him this time. Then he was too busy to think.

Ari didn't have much in the way of magic, but Stan had trained what he did have. He focused his fire magic on his sword and swung at the Simmurg. It did no damage.

"Don't use magic," Stan yelled from where he was grappling with Daylar.

"Gee, thanks," Ari yelled back. He jumped back as Chit swung at him, then stabbed for its eyes.

The other battle was suddenly and abruptly not in the vampire's favor. He was young for his species, barely two hundred years old. He had heard stories of how powerful the Shadow Kings were, how their power was passed down from one to another to become stronger with each generation. He had fought very powerful creatures before. He underestimated Stan.

Vampires are insanely fast and strong. As quickly as he could, he lunged for Stan's throat. He was a bit troubled when Stan did not attempt to dodge, but decided that he was simply moving so fast that his opponent appeared to be standing still. It was an incredibly dull-witted mistake. As he latched onto his target's neck, the Shadow Demon seemed to melt into an impenetrable darkness under his hands. He jumped backwards as a shadowy hand reached up from the ground to pull him down.

Suddenly, the entire world exploded into a sound that could best be described as a wire brush being scraped across a blackboard into a microphone with the speaker volume set on max. The feedback-style squealing would have made a deaf man cry for silence. All four combatants yelled in agony and the sound abruptly ceased. Star hadn't meant to hurt them so badly.

Stan crouched on the ground with his hands clasped against the sides of his head. His form shimmered and wavered as the pain in his head made him lose control of his power. Fortunately, Daylar was too busy tending to his own skull to notice or care.

"I'm deaf now," Ari muttered. His head felt like it was splitting open, and his ears rang painfully. He noticed that Chit had resumed its normal size and was cowering and whimpering. Although it felt a little wrong to hurt the poor terrified creature now, he lunged forward and stabbed it before it could become a threat again.

"NO!" Daylar wailed. "Chit! You'll pay for that, human!"

The grief-stricken vampire abandoned his fight with Stan and threw himself at Ari. He forgot everything; his orders, his vows…Chit had been more than a pet. It had been the vampire's familiar, and its death left a gaping hole in his mind, a hole that could only be filled by blood.

Ari tried to stab and dodge at the same time, but humans are prey for vampires, and easy prey at that. He had little hope while the vampire was still thinking; mindlessly enraged and heedless of the sword now sticking out of his stomach, the vampire bit.

Star squealed in alarm, but Daylar was unconcerned with the noise. She knew she could probably save Ari by simply raising the pitch, but she was afraid of hurting Stan anymore. He was just starting to get his form back under control. She couldn't knock the vampire away without causing him to rip Ari's throat out, and she couldn't kill it. She didn't know how to kill anything. Left with no other options, she threw herself at the vampire and tried to pull him away, but she might as well have been hauling against ten-ton weight. Magically, she was unrivaled except by Lightless Void; physically, a newborn infant could beat her up. She squealed again, and yelled for Stan.

Stan shook his head to clear it and stumbled to his feet. His body didn't want to cooperate, which was a terrifying new sensation for him. Still, he managed to throw himself on Daylar. Although his brain was still five minutes or so behind what was going on, some part of him was still enough in control to pull the vampire off of Ari and throw him to the ground. Star sang out discordantly in fear and concern for her young friend, but she was able to use her power now to hold Daylar down. He yelled and snapped and clawed at the air, but his efforts were in vain.

"Dark one!" Star called again. "Stanley! Check Ari!"

Stan shook his head again as his brain resumed normal functioning and the past five minutes caught up to him. His language as he dove for Ari would have made a sailor take off his hat in respect. "Star, kill him already and help me!" he yelled angrily. "Stupid slave boy, getting yourself attacked like that…" he muttered as he pulled out his handkerchief and held it to the side of Ari's neck.

"…s…sorry…" Ari gasped.

"Shut up," Stan commanded. "Star!"

"I…cannot…" she said miserably.

Stan cursed her, any ancestors she might have, and any descendants she might acquire to a fate worse than show tunes. Holding the makeshift bandage with one hand, he turned and used his magic to immolate the vampire, then turned back to Ari and said, "Why do I even bother with you?"

"…'cause…it's easier…" Ari said softly.

"I think I recall telling you to shut up," Stan reminded him. "Can you at least heal him?" he demanded, turning to an increasingly distressed Star.

"I can repair the damage," she said hopefully. "But I cannot restore what he has already lost."

"Close enough." Stan moved back to allow Star to take his place. She held her hand over the two holes in the boy's neck, then closed her eyes and began to hum softly. It was off-pitch at first, but she recovered quickly before Stan could snap again. After a few seconds, she moved back. All that remained of the wounds were two tiny pink scars.

"It is all I can do," she murmured apologetically.

"Whatever!" Stan growled menacingly. He tried to simultaneously throw Ari over his shoulder and gently pick him up. Fortunately, Ari had already lost consciousness and was not bothered in the slightest by the bumpy ride. Stan muttered something about this being familiar and he couldn't imagine why.

A low hissing noise began. Stan looked around angrily at the shadow creatures that had come to attack during the moment of weakness. "Can you keep them off of us?" he asked dryly. "Or would that be doing too much damage, do you think?" Without waiting for any kind of a reply, he started moving as quickly as he could back toward the Simulacrum.

Behind him, Star dimmed her light and shuddered. She had never felt so bad in her life. As she used her power to knock the demons back, she wished, for the first time, that she could be more like her brother. He had absolutely no problem doing any damage necessary.

Ari sat alone on the edge of a cliff, looking down. It was very dark and scary, here; no moon or stars lit the sky. He wondered idly how he'd gotten there. The last thing he remembered was Stan telling him to shut up. Part of him remembered that Stan just acted that way when he was worried, and he should be flattered. Most of him was simply miserable. He didn't remember the fight, or that Stan had saved his life again.

"Poor, lost, little boy…" said a whispered voice.

"Who's there?" Ari said, turning to see.

"I am the ruler of this place," the voice answered. Ari still couldn't find the source of the voice, but there was a strange mist creeping up on him. "You look like you need a friend. I, too, would like to find one. It is very lonely here."

Ari nodded; he was getting lonely, and he did want someone to talk to. The mist reached a tendril to brush his arm, as though to lead him somewhere, and he realized that it was the one speaking. "Why don't you come with me?" it asked. "Tell me your troubles."

He nodded and stood to follow it wherever it would lead.

Natasha sighed in aggravation as she looked down at what remained of her vampire pawn. "Did you at least do what I said first?" she asked. There was no answer, but the charred remains shivered slightly. She sighed. "Oh well. I suppose we'll find out soon enough. If you did, I might consider healing you." She gestured to a pair of ghosts to bring the body and teleported back to the Necropolis.

"Good help is so hard to find," she sighed melodramatically. She caressed the name plaque that belonged to her husband and murmured, "Isn't it, my love? But soon...soon we'll be reunited."