WARNING: This Fic will contain references to and comments on religion as a whole and certain religions in particular. If you are easily offended by the questioning of certain beliefs, I ask you kindly to go elsewhere as will get a little sticky here.

Disclaimer: I own damn little, and it doesn't include BtVS.
Feedback: Please.
Band This was Written To: Bowling For Soup
For: Maia and Pol. My two favorite ladies.

Darkness Calls, chapter 17 has been wrote and re-wrote 12 times and I'm blocked on it. When I am unblocked I will post.

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It was a fairly chaotic time for Giles for a little while.

Xander had come in literally carrying Buffy and Willow had shocked him immeasurably by walking 'through' the doors of the library. After a very terse comment from the being he thought was Xander to 'take care of the silly bint', he had been left with a delusional 17th Century Buffy and a ghostly Willow both trying to explain what was happening.

Personally he was all for blaming the Irish. It was not a likely explanation, but it seemed no sillier than what he was presently hearing.

Just about the time that he'd waded through the intellectual chaff the silly bin.. uhhmmm young ladies were spouting that an actual feeling of magic swept throughout the room.

Immediately Buffy swept off the wig that was adorning her head (and thereby losing a significant number of IQ points as her blondeness reasserted itself, in his estimation) while Willow proceeded to dance around the room cursing under her breath as she cradled the hand which had 'not' gone through the table as she had expected it to.

No sooner than he had managed to get THAT particular set of crisis's almost settled when another one landed in his lap.

No, not the Irish… has to be the bloody French.

"Good evening yet again Mr. Giles. And you as well, oh delightful and blushing Mis Rosenberg "Summers." he added almost as an afterthought as he sniffed slightly in her direction.

Buffy was not fooled for an instant. She had wondered why her nerves had felt edgy for the last few minutes but had passed it off as a delayed reaction from whatever spell had affected her earlier.

"You!"

Not slowing in the least the being wearing the form of her friend Xander gazed at her quizzically. "Yes?"

She had started to get truly belligerent but then realized that the shear power that Lucifer was putting off was not conducive to her health. Giles' hand on her arm and startled "Wait Buffy" gave her the out she desperately needed.

"I-I think what Buffy is trying to ask is why are you still here and can we have our Xander back please." Willow stated in a timid voice.

"Xander is here, but not here, if you can understand what I mean Miss Rosenberg. He and I have reached an understanding concerning my 'use' of his body for the nonce. I was under the impression that you would all like to know exactly what happened this fine evening to draw one such as myself to such a wonderful hive of scum and villainy."

While Giles and Buffy goggled at the comment Willow actually stood up straight and put both hands on her hips and glared at the being who was presently starting to sit down at the main table.

"Hey, that's a Star Wars quote! One of Xander's favorites about the school."

"I know. As I said earlier this evening, I find young Xander to be an influence on me."

"Good or bad?" Giles couldn't quite resist from asking.

Cocking his head to the side he regarded the man for a moment before replying. "Considering exactly 'who' I am… are you truly positive you wish me to answer that question?"

o---0---O

Upon such consideration Giles could only answer with an emphatic: "Actually.. no."

"I didn't think so." Was said with a smirk.

Silence seemed to linger for a moment before Lucifer finally smiled at them. "It was your old friend Ethan Raines that was the originator of this evening's mayhem."

Giles flinched violently at hearing the name of his former friend and started muttering some fairly vile things under his breath.

"Oh don't worry about Mr. Raines… he and I had quite the interesting conversation. He's currently trying to explain to the denizens of his new locale just exactly 'why' he thought his idea was a good one at the time."

"So you sent him someplace?" Buffy asked. "Whew, for a moment there I thought you'd killed him."

"Who says that I didn't Miss Summers?"

"You did. You said you sent him to a new locale… whatever that is."

"Why yes, yes I did. That doesn't mean I didn't kill him for his presumptuousness however. There's many locales where being dead would not merely be a good idea but rather a necessity." It was almost recognizable that he was intentionally pushing her buttons but Buffy couldn't see that.

"How could you do that?"

"Do what Miss Summers?" He asked back at her while slumping back slightly and putting his feet up on the table. After a small 'harumph' from Giles he simply looked at the man blandly and left his feet where they were.

"You killed a man. He had a soul."

"And your point is? You kill beings all the time…." He said smiling in a tight little way that had Giles and Willow both sliding backwards from the scene.

"I slay Vampires and Demons. That's so not the same."

"It isn't?" He asked viciously, with a sneer on his face.

"Of course it isn't!" She replied indignantly. "They don't have souls."

"Truly?"

"They don't have souls…."

"Really, did you weigh them? Smell it or the lack of it? Tell me Buffy, how do you know they don't have souls?"

"I just do."

"Wonderful… you are convinced… So was Hitler concerning the Jews."

At that particular comment Willow squeaked and paled while, Giles looked a bit pasty himself.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

As he ignored her for watching the other two occupants of the room she started to get upset until he finally shifted his gaze to her in a flat stare. Suddenly feeling much like a mouse when viewing a hawk she visibly shuddered and dropped her gaze first.

"So there are demons with souls?" Willow asked timidly.

"Tell me Mr. Giles, ever hear of a Hell God?" He asked suddenly.

"Well, yes, actually, there are several accounts of…"

"Why would there be a Hell God for creatures that don't have a soul? Why would they need a belief system without a soul that they would need a God? Most so called 'Demons' are nothing more than creatures native to another plane of existence that are visiting or stranded in ours. In another dimension, YOU are the Demons. "Demons: DimEntional MONSters"

He leaned back in his chair and grinned ruefully

"Granted, there are the exceptions to the rule, but even vampires have a 'soul' or anima if you will. How do you think they take control of their hosts' bodies? What's missing in a vampire? (besides a pulse) The original host's soul…. So what is forcing the animation of the dead tissue? A soul. It takes it's personality quirks from the outgoing soul, but it is an evil twisted version of the original. Otherwise, the remaining animated corpse would have no personality. There is a word for creatures like that: Zombies. Course some voodoo religions have a work around for that also.

"You expect me to just take your word for all this?"

"Frankly Miss Summers, I really could care less if you 'take my word' or not. Miss Rosenberg asked me a question, and I have answered. However, I would strongly recommend you do NOT imply I am a liar again; else, I will be sorely tempted to let you know what the afterlife is like personally."

A quiet settled over the room for a few moments as the words of their visitor echoed in the heads. Could it be possible? And what did it truly mean about themselves and the world?

"Is there anything else you would like to inquire about Miss Rosenberg?

"D-During the fight you had with Spike… who stopped you from killing him and why?"

He smiled at her indulgently. "Ahhh yes, you always do delight in asking the hard ones don't you?"

As she blushed, he continued.

"Lets us talk about the holy trinity…"

"The Father the Son and the Holy Spirit, correct?"

"No, actually Mr. Giles, I was referring to Yahweh/Jehovah, Allah, and God."

"Jehovah looked at branching out in his followers. Unfortunately he split himself a bit too much and became Allah and Jehovah. Enough of a split that reconciliation of the two parts was unfeasible (schizoid old fart) Then he went off the deep end and decided to give his 'faithful' their messiah… boy did he screw the pooch on that one."

"The Hebrews were expecting a warrior.. A King to lead them. He sent them Jesual."

"Who?"

"My brother. He always was a bit of a wuss"

"Excuse me?" "A What?" "Huh?"

"A wuss. You know, a pacifist? Turn the other cheek and all... Gets you another slapped cheek is all that does."

"Anyways… Jesual… you people now call him Jesus by the way. His being the messiah forced yet another schism in that the 'God' of the new testament and the Jehovah of the old testament are almost reverse in their interactions with their followers. God is a merciful being; Jehovah is the fire and brimstone, eye for an eye deity. Of course the majority of Hebrews renounced this 'messiah' even as Christianity took hold and outgrew it in sheer number of followers. It's almost amusing that the direct descendent of Judaism would be responsible for the persecution of it's own parent religion. So, the Christian God is a split of the Hebrew god who made good with his followers and gained in power while Jehovah was left with his 'true believers' Jehovah always was a bit of a screw-up"

"Tended to lie his ass off too…"

"He WHAT!"

"Ooooooh, that struck a nerve there didn't it?"

Grinning wildly he pulled his feet down off the table and standing up shrugged his shoulders slightly, settling the antique artilleryman's jacket a bit.

"Oh come on… don't you people even read your own bible? Try Genesis… you don't even need to go any further than that to see how repressive, domineering and full of shit Jehovah was."

With a gesture, a bible appeared in his hands.

"Let us look at this shall we?"

Quickly he flipped the bible open and scanned the page for the verse he was looking for.

"First of all, we know that there are more than one god out there. It's right there. The third word in the Hebrew test of Genesis. By the way: that third word, Elohim? It's a plural. If it wasn't there wouldn't be a reason for Ex. 20:3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Now would there? Of course the Christian Bible has been translated and retranslated. Hebrew to Greek to Latin to English. Is it any wonder that mistakes occurred during such?" But noooo… Jehovah didn't like that fact and tried to cover it up later in the 'revisions'. Hence the Hebrew and Christian belief that any other gods do not exist or are in fact fallen 'angels' and lesser than Jehovah."

"Shall we talk about the fact that he told Adam that if he ate from the fruit of the tree of knowledge, that on that day, he would die? Of course if you read a little further it tells you that Adam went on to live for quite a few years after that… as in several hundred."

As Giles started to open his mouth, Xander/Lucifer stared him down. "I'm quite aware of what you are about to argue Mr. Giles, that Jehovah punished Adam and Eve to 'death' by not allowing them to partake of the Tree of Life which would have given them immortality, but is it not telling that Jehovah would rather them live forever in ignorance than to live several hundred years with knowledge? Is it any wonder that some of his followers would dislike this?"

"Anyway, back to the original question Miss Rosenberg posed: Jehovah had to decide who he was going to send as the Messiah. A lamb set for sacrifice or a warrior king as the vast majority of Hebrews wished for so reverently."

"My brother Jesual… or Me."

A pin dropping would have sounded exceedingly loud in the silence that followed that comment.

"B-b-but you're the devil!" Buffy finally managed to stammer out.

Willow and Giles both winced and Giles managed a muttered "That was eloquent." As Lucifer suddenly slammed the legs of the chair he'd been leaning back in down onto the floor.

"It was Jerome's improper Vulgate translation of Isaiah 14:12 that made me the principal 'Fallen Angel' Miss Summers. St. Jerome gave it Biblical authority when he transformed it into Satan's proper name. Saint my ass… stupid smelly hermit screwball… I shoulda…" He trailed of muttering various imprecations and glared at Buffy. "Now Milton, he didn't get it right either, but at least HE can blame it on the fact that he was drunk when I told him my story."

"Uhmmm, who is Milton?" Buffy finally asked.

He looked at her a bit incredulously. "John Milton. Paradise Lost. You have read it have you not?"

"No. At least I don't think so… Willow?" She whined plaintively as she looked over to see her friend nodding her head vigorously.

"We had to read it last year Buffy, remember? You told me that a G'narrl demon ate your report on it."

"Oh. Yeah. I remember. Sorta…"

#SIGH#

Buffy wasn't sure which was worse. The fact that Giles had sighed, the fact that Lucifer sighed, or the fact that they did it in stereo.

"I am NOT the Devil, nor am I Satan, Beelzebub, or any other of the various names or titles that the vast majority of humans seem determined to assign to me. I am Lucifer Morning Star; the Day star, son of the Dawn."

I did NOT lead a rebellion of my fellow Seraphim against Jehovah or God. Yes I argued that I should be the Messiah instead of Jesual. Considering all that has occurred In Jesus' Name are you so certain that the right choice was made?"

As Buffy started to open her mouth he continued ruthlessly…

"The Inquisition? You have heard of that have you not? The Crusades? The Thity Years War that left Central Europe a wasteland? Gott mit uns, perhaps? The Russian Purges? How about the Salem Witch Trials? Or did a different demon eat that report Miss Summers?"

"The Holocaust." Willow stated in a voice of ruin and pain.

At Buffy's hurt look she straightened up and stared her friend in the eye, almost daring her to argue the point.

Buffy looked away first.

"Quite." Lucifer said settling back again slightly. "As I was saying before we left off on yet another tangent; Jesual, renamed as Jesus, was chosen as the messiah by God. I disagreed. Vehemently in fact. God decided to remove me from his premises and here we are."

"That's it?" Buffy asked incredulously

"Yes Miss Summers, as you so succinctly put it: that is it. No great battle, no failed insurrection. Merely God telling me to leave and not darken his realm again. Amusingly enough, what he feared from me was realized in truth by my brother."

"Huh?"

"What he means Buffy, is that God feared Lucifer would take over his place, so he picked Jesus as the Messiah. Now the followers of God are actually Christians, followers of Christ, and by default, God." Seeing the blank look on Buffy's face, he added. "His power base, if you will, is shared by God and Jesus now, instead of just God."

"Exactly so Mr. Giles." Lucifer added in from the side. "The gods of today become the devils and demons of tomorrow. The angels as you know them are not in fact what you believe them to be. We were a pantheon. Not a true monotheism. Not much different from many other pantheons that you have heard of, and in fact, many of us form those other pantheons as gods in our own right. The Cherubim, the Seraphim, and the Host of Heaven. (By the way, God is named as the 'Lord of the Hosts' in your bible over 200 times Miss Summers, that alone should give someone a clue) We were followers of Jehovah, Allah, and God much in the same manner that some of them were also the Greek gods who were the followers of Zeus, and the followers of Ra that were in Egypt."

He paused for a moment and then added. "Most of the Egyptian gods hated Jehovah by the way, that is why the Hebrews were persecuted by them so badly."

"Anyway… The Sumerian gods were the same, the Babylonian? The same. Etc. etc. etc… All were higher beings who took on a name and were worshipped. Sometimes becoming a villain in the eyes of the next religion, sometimes merely becoming a new god within the same pantheon or moving to another. Why do you think the gods of Greece and Rome were so alike? They were the same higher beings, under different names is all, the better to gain in power."

By now Buffy's head was spinning as she attempted to keep track of all the side issues. "But…"

"Yes?"

"So what is the 'TRUE' religion? Buffy finally got out.

"Weren't you even listening? They're all 'true' They are all valid… to their believers with the power of that particular deity directly proportional to the number and power of it's followers."

"Huh?" Buffy asked even as the light figuratively went on in Willow's head.

All of the religions, and I do mean ALL of them are valid. They are all real to their believers, regardless of what any other being may believe. We higher beings derive our power and status from the amount and power of our worshippers. Humans, being not normally very powerful, make up for it in sheer numbers. Certain so-called 'Hell Gods' have followers that are much more powerful and require less total followers for the same power supplied. That is partly why Bast is such a powerhouse… she has Humans and Cats both supplying her with a power base."

"Ya, well they're kinda helpful with their nine lives and all…"

"That's actually the first smart thing you've said tonight Buffy."

"What!"

"Cat's do have nine lives / reincarnations before their souls finally ascend to Bast's side… and they remember their past lives, and for that they ALL worship her. Why do you think even the smallest kitten when threatened 'pops' it's claws? It knows what to do. Small souls perhaps, but definitely strength in numbers."

"oh"

"Now, even though I have been denied my place by Jehovah and God, I still belong to that pantheon simply by virtue of being on of the villains of the piece. After all, what use is the so called good guy without a villain to combat and foil? My brother is the one who asked me to spare William the Bloody for his own reasons. As he is my brother I felt obliged to acquiesce to his request."

At Buffy's blank look he grimaced slightly and said: "That means I said yes."

"Does that answer your question Miss Rosenberg?"

Willow started to nod but then thought it through for a moment only to have him continue.

"No, I don't know why he wanted him to survive Miss Rosenberg, only that Jesual seems to feel that young William has a part to play. The prat wouldn't tell me his reason."

"Oh"

"Yes. I really wanted to end his sorry excuse for an unlife… and on that note I leave you all with a small present per the request of my host."

"Huh? "What?" "Oh Shit!" Were the three thoughts that prevailed at that moment even as they felt a slight pressure within themselves for a moment.

"Whoa, what a rush!" Came the unexpected comment out of Xander's mouth moments before being almost crushed in a babbling redhead's arms.

"Relax Wills, I'm back it's all of the good"

"My word… Xander are you okay?"

"I'm good G-man." He replied even as he looked over at Buffy in a silent communication that all was well. I'm good."

They all sat there for a few minutes trying to get a handle on what had happened. Finally, Xander shifted Willow around and set her gently on her feet. "I do think it's time for us all to be headin home though, don't you?" He asked even as he stood and started to lead the still clinging Willow along with him.

"Xander? Before you depart… you do remember everything that happened do you not?"

"Oh yea, I remember G-man… you try spending an evening as Lucifer's Avatar and see if you can forget."

"Uhmm… Xan?" Buffy asked quietly. About this 'present'?"

"All in good time Buffy, I'm sure if you asked Lucifer's High Priest nicely you might get answer."

"Oh"

"I take it from the way you worded that, that you know who his High Priest is Xander?"

"You could say that Giles." he said with a smirk even as his eyes flashed for a moment with the light of the morning sun. "You could say that."

QSK

"Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heav'n." —Paradise Lost, Book I, 263