Shadows That Bleed

by YamiYugiPuzzleshipper

Pure-Bloods are said to be myths, not even well-known within stories. "A specialized genetic coding of the moon and the dire," their spoken lore proclaims. They are creatures beyond the power of mortality, gifted by the gods themselves. Known as the Eternal Ones, their existence once extinguished, resurrection foretells a powerful omen.

70. Bonds

Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh

Update schedule: Hopefully biweekly

Chapter Warnings: Self-Loathing, Mentions of Death, Thoughts of Death, Hints of Depression

Black Shuck is a black dog/hellhound most well known for busting into the Holy Trinity Church during a thunderstorm and burning people and the door he scratched at. He only killed a couple of people, but the church steeple crashed through the roof. He showed up at two different churches on the same day (St. Mary in Bungay and Holy Trinity in Blythburgh) on August 4, 1577. He is still seen today. His appearance occasionally changes; he sometimes has red eyes, green eyes, or golden eyes, and sometimes only one eye instead of two. Sometimes he has chains and other times he doesn't.

Wish/Wisht hounds are hellhounds that are headless and considered to be the spirits of children who died without being baptized.

Chapter LXX: Bonds

Work Log Entry LXIII: March, 2008

March 28

The boss is becoming aggravated again.

The wolves are not bearing pups.

It could be the stress or the constant changes within the environment.

It could be the new experiments we've been performing on them.

It could simply be Atem for all any of us know.

But it has been determined that they are completely barren.

They cannot conceive, no matter the surgeries we perform in an effort to rectify this.

Yami hesitated at the entrance of the kitchen again. His tongue felt dry and swollen, caked against the roof of his mouth. He blinked and glanced over his shoulder towards the bedroom door. But he knew that Yugi was still watching TV in his room, as Yami had told him that he was hungry and wanted to grab a couple of snacks before he came back. He had made sure that the other teen had not followed him, knowing instinctively Yugi would have offered to grab him something if he had simply shown an interest. Yugi was always eager to help out, to please anyone around him. Yami did not know if it was a weakness or a strength sometimes. Mercy could make someone weak, though he felt that Yugi somehow managed to utilize it as strength regardless.

Yami licked his lips and came to the kitchen table, hesitating again. "May I take a seat?" he asked cautiously. The words were met with silence at first, then with a bewildered and startled expression as the other person looked up with wide eyes. She blinked at him, frowned minutely, and then gestured for him to sit across from her.

"What's on your mind?"

He was not used to talking. It was something that had always caused him trouble upon attempting conversation with others. He had never been entirely too graceful in his tone of voice or the choice of his words. And so often he worried about this, as he knew that perhaps this was something that caused more animosity than he could truly pinpoint. He shivered as he took his seat, moving to put his hands in his lap, and watched her with glittering red eyes.

"I wished to apologize to you." He hesitated, unsure of what more he might say at the moment but these words. He licked his lips and turned his eyes towards the tabletop again, resisting the urge to drum his fingers on the wooden surface. "I have caused much frustration and unhappiness and for that I offer apology."

She was staring at him with darkened eyes. "It's not your fault," she said, but her voice sounded sarcastic more than anything. Kasumi peered at him as if with some sense of disdain and frustration. "It's not like you're the only reason he's like this. You're not the only reason this happened."

Yami almost wished he could have hated her for those words. She blamed him. She truly blamed him for all of it. And that…

It was a truth he could not ignore. She was right to blame him. He'd bitten Yugi. He'd caused him to change into a wolf. What had come about because of those things was because of him.

"It was in our family bloodline regardless," Kasumi continued, though her voice seemed bitter. He could see the anger in her eyes, the glint of frustration and perhaps even rage that came with this statement. "Even if you hadn't bitten him, there was always the chance that it would somehow react anyways. I guess I should have paid more attention to those stupid little myths and legends when I was growing up, huh?"

Yami faltered, startled by the words. Then he frowned and studied her blankly for a handful of seconds. He licked his lips and shook his head, lowering his eyes towards the tabletop once more. "I still apologize," he said softly, "for the inconveniences that I have caused you. I do not know if I can truly tell you how much I regret any of this happening to your family. None of you deserved—"

"You honestly think that I don't realize that this stupidity isn't just your fault? I know my son. I know how he puts everyone ahead of himself. I know that very well. I know that better than you do, regardless of what you might think, Yami. And I'm not stupid. I know that there's a reason why there is so much going on in Domino now of all times. If you hadn't bitten him, I'm sure someone else might have."

Tomoya, most likely. He was the only one who had seen Yugi lying prone against the wall as he had that day as well. So perhaps he might have bitten him had Yami not. But he wondered how Yugi might have healed, how long it might have taken, had that happened in such a way. Yami drew in a deep breath and shook his head, narrowing his eyes into slits.

"It's not coincidence that things are suddenly escalating out of control. It doesn't make any sense that all of the sudden there are clues leading to the wolves now if they've been around for so long." She huffed. "Something is going on. And most likely Yugi is going to be selfless and stupid. And he'll get himself hurt before he can think it through. Am I right?"

Yami stared at Kasumi for what felt like an eternity. And then he slowly looked down at the tabletop again, pointedly peering at it as if it were more important than ever. He looked at it as if it were the biggest secret of the universe. He blinked, then curled his lips back and shook his head slowly.

Yugi had already hurt himself more than he could possibly recover upon entering the world he existed within. It was something that Yami could not bring himself to speak about, nor something that he could possibly put into words. It was a statement which shook him too terribly to deal with and his heart was in his throat as he stared at the table more pointedly. He did not know what he was meant to say, nor what to do. She knew.

She knew.

She did not even know entirely what it was that the wolves were meant to go through, or what they were going to sacrifice themselves for the sake of. Yugi was going to most likely get himself killed before the end of this war. And, regardless of the fact that he might come to life again afterwards, it was something that Yami feared more than he could deal with. It was something that he was too afraid to point out to her. Voicing such a thing made him want to vomit and to simply turn away entirely and hide as he had once pretended was possible.

"If you're truly so sorry, Yami, can you answer a question for me?" she asked him, voice soft and cold for a brief moment. Yami blinked and raised his head, turning his eyes on her and staring back blankly. He could not summon any words to give her, his affirmation a simple blink of encouragement. "Can you tell me why it is that Yugi is the one that had to be brought into this? Can you tell me what purpose is served by him doing what he's doing?"

Yami was silent for a moment. And then he lowered his eyes again.

"I am a coward." He drew in a deep breath, voice cracked and sore and raw around the edges. "I am a coward and he is braver than me."

Kasumi stared at him coldly for a long moment. And then she slowly shook her head again, all but sneering at him as she got to her feet. "So, in other words, you're too weak to stop him. And he's too foolish to know when to stop."

Yami nodded mutely. There were no words he could offer. She was upset and he did not know what more to do than to agree. And the words were true. The words were absolute. He had no words to dispute her. He had no words that might comfort her either, however. And he hated himself more than ever that he could not attempt to perhaps help her with her grief.

Because he knew that this was coming to her. He knew that pain more acutely than he could ever explain to her. He had mourned his cage mate. He had mourned himself when he had first come to hate himself more than he could stand. And he knew that he could not consider himself worse now than he had before. And it made his heart flip and twist and stutter within his chest. He looked down at the tablecloth more pointedly, because he could offer no sympathy and had no idea how to deal with it all. He could not offer her more than his silence at the moment.

He had absolutely nothing that he could offer her in condolences of any kind.

"Well…at least you are truthful." She turned and wandered off into the living room and Yami stood up. He felt uncomfortable, smaller than ever. And he remembered his flesh being cut into and blood taken in vials to be examined. He remembered Ryou muttering, whispering and shaking his head and sometimes offering him a confused look.

He shivered and reached up to run his fingers through his hair. Then he turned to make his way back into Yugi's room. His heart was in his throat again as he opened the door and closed it immediately behind him. Yugi blinked up at him with a tilt of his head, furrowing his brows.

"Did you eat out there then?"

Yami blinked and nodded shortly, ignoring the urge to simply snarl at him in turn. He forced himself to turn away, moving to take a seat beside him next to the bed. He crossed his legs and watched the television screen as the lights threatened to make his eyes ache. His beta looked at him sideways once, then turned away again to stare at the screen.

"What did you grab?"

"A granola bar." He wondered if there were actually any left.

"Oh, okay." Yugi looked over to him again, his eyes reflecting the light from the screen next to him, and then licked his lips and watched him for a long moment. "And you're not hungry anymore then?"

Yami shook his head after a moment. "Not enough to eat again, no." He wondered if Yugi was asking him now because he had heard him talking to his mother. Had he heard that, Yami was sure that Yugi would not believe him in the slightest. The realization made him feel sick, made him want almost to vomit if only for a second. But then, perhaps Yugi would rather argue with him than speak as it was.

"All right," he said quietly, nodding, but he sounded distracted as he looked over at the television again. "Well, as long as you're no longer hungry."

Yami hated him for a moment. He truly hated him. And it was for no other reason than the fact that he was kind and that generosity shook him to the core. How was Yugi so giving and kind? And to him, of all people?

Kasumi was not wrong.

Yugi was too foolish to know when he should stop. He was too giving and protective and somehow he had chosen to believe Yami was worth his efforts. And Yami himself was too fearful to do what he was meant to, from training Yugi to interacting with the pack to the various other problems. And this made him hateful of them both, though his self-loathing seemed simply to swell and grow tenfold. The raw edges of his wounds seemed to grow twice as painful, flayed and burning as if the air were capable of clawing them open more so than before.

But he didn't think those wounds could bleed anymore.

He didn't think he could feel more pain.

Yami shook his head after a moment and looked at the screen pointedly. There was no reason for him to answer him at any rate. Yugi could stay content with his answer or grow frustrated if he would like. As it was, he would most likely do the latter. He knew that Yugi was well aware of the fact that he was lying. He knew well enough that the other had said that last statement because he was asking him to be truthful with him. But the truth was raw and broken and exhausting.

And Yami found himself unable to care for it any longer. Let the truth be buried and left behind somewhere. He would perhaps enjoy his life more should something of that magnitude happen. But then, he could not remember such a sensation unless he was running about as a wolf, hunting and swimming and rolling around. Now that the snow was there, it was only more reason for him to roll about and rest comfortably amongst the white flakes.

And he wondered if Yugi hated him for that sometimes. He wondered if Yugi was ever angry with him over this thought of life. Yugi had never truly shown such emotion before and it made him want to vomit even more than ever now. And his heart ached at the thought. But he could not find it within himself to care longer than to address this for a single split second of acknowledgment.

Yami was watching the television with a pointed stare now, trying his hardest to ignore Yugi altogether. The smaller teen kept his eyes on him from his peripheral, Yami knew, but he was not about to comment on such a thing. The show was something to do with the controversy of pit bull dogs and breeds of similar stature and build. The voice which narrated the program was saying something of the purpose of the dogs.

They had been bred for bull and bear baiting. They were considered a breed of reputation that was almost as misdirected as that of the wolf's own. And, the more he watched, the more he felt sick.

The humans had continued to breed them to have them pitted against one another in fights that often led to nothing more than death. If that were the truth of it, then what more purpose did the lycanthropes themselves serve? All of them would likely die. All of them would most likely kill themselves…

And for what?

A boy who could not explain his own purpose to his followers? A wolf born unnaturally within labs and tortured continuously for nothing more than the humans' sick enjoyment?

What was their meaning?

To cure illness?

To grant themselves immortality?

Did they search for what marked them differently from the animals?

Was it for greed?

Was it out of selflessness?

Yami did not think he could apply the latter to any human he had ever met. Yugi was a wolf and thus he could no longer judge him as such. And the closest he had seen to altruism was Ryou. But even Ryou, sweet little Ryou who had betrayed his employers and suffered death at their hands, had never acted out of something so pure.

He had done so to alleviate his own guilt.

He had known that when he was growing up.

He had known the moment he had come to understand this reality.

Ryou had done what he could for the wolves to save his conscience.

At some point he had grown to care for Atem. And from there he had struggled to hold away his disdain for the humans he'd worked with. He'd gone from calling Atem by various code names to his abbreviated title of Atem. And from there he'd gone further and further into the throes of betrayal in his aid. He had saved him to stop his guilt. He'd gone to save Yugi in the woods because he'd felt it would help him even more to overcome his own self-hatred.

He'd sacrificed himself. But it had not been for Yami or Yugi in truth. And he understood that more than he'd truly wished to admit formerly.

The judgment was harsh and hideous. And he'd wished more than once that perhaps he was wrong. But he'd known that farewell, just as he'd known before then that his cage mate had done what he had out of pure love for him.

He nearly shivered.

How did anyone come to love someone such as him?

Yami felt that, had he known himself in another person, he would hate them more than anyone else he had ever come to cross paths with. There was no part of him which doubted this in the slightest. There was so much about him, so much which he possessed, that was troublesome and terrible. And he hated himself more than ever for this admission alone.

"We are made for war," Yami found himself muttering under his breath. Perhaps it was the sound of his breath leaving his lungs or the way his lips moved in his peripheral, but Yugi turned to him with a confused expression soon after. "That's what we're here for. The werewolves…altogether… We're just here to fight a war for the gods for their own entertainment."

Yugi blinked at him. "Yami?"

Yami ignored the concern in his tone, narrowing his eyes. "We won't save anything. We'll destroy everything. And then we'll watch everyone and everything die away." He lowered his eyes from the screen, pain searing through his temple. "War breeds death. The gods bred the Hounds of Heaven for the sole purpose of spreading death."

"Yami?" Yugi sounded more concerned now, perhaps even slightly alarmed. "What's wrong? What are you talking about?"

Yami shook his head slowly. "It's nothing worth repeating," he answered quietly, calmly, turning to him with darkened eyes. "It's just something I've been thinking about for a little while now."

"Do you want to share?"

"Hmm? No. Not at all."

Yugi seemed to hesitate for a moment. Then he blinked at him, drew in a deep breath, and leaned towards him the smallest degree. "I can help you if that's what you need."

"Help?" the red-eyed teen echoed, smirking lopsidedly. "I don't need help, Yugi. I once needed help. And it ruined everything. I don't need help anymore."

I need so much more than help.

Yugi stared at him, troubled. "And that means what?" he asked slowly. "You're not quite making sense."

"It means that the last time I received help, people died for it. The last time I allowed myself to need help and accepted it, the most important person to me was killed." Yami lowered his eyes when Yugi flinched slightly. "And I do not want a repeat of this to happen, Yugi. I do not want that to happen at all. I…"

"It won't happen again. I promise."

"You promise? Because you surely dictate such things. I had forgotten that Atem is all knowing and powerful and can change the world as he so wants."

"Everyone has the ability to make things change. Whether they do it or not is something else entirely, Yami. But I'm telling you that I have plans and making a change is one of them. Nothing is going to stop that."

"I'm sure when you put something to your mind it is guaranteed to be accomplished." Yami offered him a weak smile to play the peacemaker for the sake of keeping Yugi from growing so upset. But his insides seemed to burn as he spoke again and his skin itched for the briefest of moments. "I do not doubt you have enough determination."

Yugi seemed at first to try to smile, and then to falter. He frowned and considered him for a long moment or two. "I try," he finally mumbled, almost as if ashamed that he could think of nothing else to say.

Yami ignored the expression on his face, somewhere between flustered and unsure and perhaps mildly confused and concerned as well. The red-eyed teen nearly curled his lip as Yugi continued watching him. He fought the urge to squirm, then to snarl in annoyance as he shot the smaller boy a glance from the corner of his eye. By the gods, why did Yugi have to keep staring at him so pointedly like this?

He wanted to bristle, but fought it away moments later with a deep breath and a slight shake of his head. He held the air in his lungs and then finally turned to Yugi with anger in his eyes. His beta stared back at him impassively for a long moment, then seemed to grow irritable as well.

Their eyes locked as they were, Yugi found his shoulders rising slowly to shield his neck. Yami had drawn his lips back to show his teeth for a split second, but neither had begun to snarl yet. And Yami supposed he had to thank the smallest of miracles for this of all things. He drew in a deep breath, narrowing his eyes into slits.

"Are you okay?"

Yami nearly sputtered out a laugh. Even when he was pissed Yugi was trying to check on him and ease his growing discomfort. And for once the red-eyed teen truly wondered if it was possible to hate someone as sweet as Yugi himself was. He shook his head and drew in another tight breath which seemed to choke within the pressure of his constricted lungs.

"Yes," he said tightly. "I am fine."

"Then why are we upset?"

We? It was an interesting choice of pronoun and one which made him smile for a brief second. And then he shrugged it away again to face him with darkened eyes, considering and studying and wondering.

"Because I'm a temperamental asshole and I'm extremely tired and it makes me volatile." Yami watched him for a moment, wondering what it was that he might say to him in turn. And then he shook his head as he realized Yugi would most likely argue against his statement altogether. "I'm sorry."

The anger seemed to dissipate from them both immediately upon the words leaving his mouth. Yugi offered him a small smile and Yami tilted his head as he considered him with somewhat warmed eyes. A few seconds passed and the two of them found themselves laughing, an awkward and unsure burst of noise. They blinked, blushing faintly, and looked away almost in unison.

"It's okay. No reason to really apologize."

"I'm just really tired."

"I know the feeling. I get that way a lot too."

Yami snorted softly. "You? I never would have imagined such a thing," he huffed in amusement. He shook his head, tilting it a second later, and smiled warmly. "Regardless, I apologize. I shouldn't have…snapped at you like that."

"You know, normally when someone says 'snapped' it means a verbal statement in a tone that no one really likes. I don't think glaring and bristling really counts for that." Yugi was fidgeting now. He licked his lips and looked down at the carpet for a split second. Then he glanced at him sideways from his peripheral. "I think that what you did was more like a standoff with me."

"That's most likely true."

Yugi smiled again, nodded, and turned back to the television. He licked his lips after a moment, commenting quietly, "But that's okay too. It's not like you attacked me or something. Being irate sometimes is perfectly fine."

Yami shook his head slowly. "I do not like snapping at you as I have, Yugi. It is nothing I want to have happen as often as it does."

Yugi shrugged but refused to look at him now. "It doesn't matter that much, Yami. It's okay. I promise I'm not upset about it. It happens. We're both going to end up snapping at each other as long as we're around each other." He paused, then slowly turned his head and peered at him with eyes that rapidly searched his. "And I'm hoping that we're not going to change that. I mean, I really hope that we're going to stay around each other for a while longer."

Yami blinked, startled by the comment and then with the way that the blue-violet eyes bore so relentlessly into his. Was he truly afraid that he might want otherwise? Was he so fearful that he might turn his back on him? Was it something that Yugi suffered from the bond between them as alpha and beta? Or was it to do with the fact that Yugi simply feared being alone that caused this?

Yami had never been sure where their relationship truly stemmed. He could not truly understand and explain such a thing to himself or to Yugi in turn. How he was meant to explain the bond to another person looking in on them and their relationship was a thing that Yami could not even fathom.

How was he meant to ever tell someone else about them?

Had Yugi ever seemed so attached to Jonouchi in turn, he would have simply said it was the alpha-beta connection that existed between them. He would have done the same to his own bond with Yugi.

But the edges were blurred between them. Somehow Yugi was dependent upon him and Yami himself suffered the same with him. It was horrifying to him. But it was also relieving in a manner that he could not truly put into words. He had no way of explanation for such a thing and it was all but impossible to even so much as speak about it altogether.

And now, as he stared into his eyes, Yami found himself more lost then ever. His heart was in his throat as he considered him. There was no way he knew how to express their relationship. He had no idea what it would mean to put it into words, either…

He drew in a deep breath.

Then he exhaled.

And repeated the gesture once.

He did it again.

And finally he blinked and shook his head, licking his lips. "I do not plan to leave you behind," he answered after a moment. And he was not sure what exactly those words meant. He felt shaky as he faced Yugi so pointedly. "So I would think that we will remain around each other a long while yet."

Right?

By the gods he hoped he did not sound as foolish and presumptuous as he felt at the moment. He drew in a deep breath, closed his eyes, and tried to suppress the dizziness which threatened to overtake him.

"Okay." Yugi sounded as if he were too relieved to speak much more than to say that. But then he let out something of a choked laugh, as if he were too stunned to continue. "Wow. I sure know how to make things uncomfortable, don't I?"

"If you didn't, things wouldn't be quite as much fun as they are," Yami stated with a shake of his head. He smiled a flimsy little twist of his lips and looked away soon after. It was hard to face Yugi any longer. There was too much that the smaller boy seemed to be asking of him, so much that Yami was sure he could never give him. "Things would be far too boring if we didn't have something awkward and uncomfortable happen every now and then, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so, huh?" But Yugi sounded faintly troubled and Yami knew more than ever that it concerned him. But he was not willing to look at him now. He was too afraid of the possibility of the stare that Yugi had given him moments before. And so he kept his eyes on the screen even as the lights burned his corneas and he felt as if his vision might spin out of control at any moment.

"I'm tired."

Yami blinked, startled by the sound of his own voice. He felt small and dizzy and sick for a moment. Then he reached up to run his fingers over the collar of his tank top. He pulled at the fabric a few inches beneath it, knotting it in his fist and narrowing his eyes.

It was a habit he had not displayed in quite a while.

The last he remembered doing it was when his cage mate had given his life to allow him to escape. He had been tugging on it out of anxiety, struggling to keep himself grounded in his exhaustion. He had been so desperate to simply lie back down and sleep and had been unable to. His cage mate had begged him not to. He had struggled and urged him awake and he'd convinced him to remain that way. And the only way he'd managed to stay upright and keep his eyes open had been by fisting the material of the disgusting experiment slacks they'd been given.

He remembered it more vibrantly now than he had for a long time. The fabric had been itchy and the pressure of pulling it against his skin was enough to irritate him. Doing so had caused him discomfort intense enough to make him remain awake. And then he had listened to his cage mate as the other had paced about and told him repeatedly that he would have to run…

Yami reached a hand up to run through his hair. His poor cage mate… He had died to save him and seemingly done so for nothing. Yami was alive, yes, but…

There was so much that…

Yami blinked and lowered his eyes. His cage mate had loved him. He'd known that. His cage mate had cared for him more than he'd cared for even himself by the time that they'd all set the immense plan into motion for Atem's escape. In the chaos, his cage mate had convinced him to flee as well. He'd insisted even when Yami struggled to understand what he wanted of him. He'd pushed and pushed and begged until Yami had folded, agreeing reluctantly to flee.

And when Yami had seen what had become of him…

His sacrifice was still in vain, however.

He was alive.

But what was a life such as his meant to provide when there was nothing he himself cared for less?

It was not true to say that he wished to die. But Yami was aware of his own limitations. And he thought that, if the opportunity were forced upon him, he would cease the battle before he would flail as desperately for his life as someone such as Yugi would.

Yugi was afraid to die.

Yami treated it as a plague which could not claim him as of the moment, but one which he knew would overcome him later. It did not matter his species or his bloodline. It mattered only that all things must die. And when that happened, Yami was not sure a struggle would do more than prolong the inevitable. And prolonging such a thing seemed almost dirty…

Why should he fight for his own when so many had been sacrificed in vain before him? Why should he struggle for such a thing when his own life probably mattered so little in the grand scheme of things?

Yami closed his eyes again rather tightly.

Perhaps he might strive to save someone else. Maybe he would give his own life for someone such as Yugi—for surely, as lost as he was, the other boy was as selfless and beautiful a soul as could ever exist—at the end of it all. Because he did not think that the others within the pack were worthy of it, regardless of the raw wounds which marred it or the pain which it might exude so often.

Yugi would surely be a cause worthy of death…

Not Atem. Never Atem.

But always Yugi. Only ever Yugi.

Yami ran a hand through his hair and shook his head after a long moment. "I think… I think I might need to rest."

Yugi was quiet beside him for a long moment. And then he sighed softly. "Feel free to then, aibou. I'll wake you later for dinner if that's what you want."

---

When Yami woke again, it was darker than he'd expected. The room was bathed in startling blackness from a cloudless sky and a snowfall so dense it blocked much of the street lamp. It made him jerk awake, eyes wide as he looked about the room stiffly. His bones popped and jerked beneath his skin and he narrowed his eyes into slits. He did not know what lurked within the shadows and it made him uneasy as he glanced around once more.

"Yugi?" he asked into the quiet stillness of the room. But he heard no answer in turn and it made him stiffen as he rose further to sit straight beneath the blanket. The comforter was thick and bunched from what had to have been his tossing and turning moments before. And the fleece was knotted across his lap as he blinked again and looked to the streetlamp once more.

The snowflakes were so dense and large that they looked like a uniform sheet of white. Yami wondered at the sight, unsure of it now that he was within his human form regarding it. He had seen it so many times like this when he was a wolf. But now it startled him, leaving him feeling cold as if winter had grasped upon his skin and threatened to claw through his flesh altogether.

He shivered and moved to stand. The blessing of lycanthropy was one such as a balance that never faltered. And his faulty limbs caught him immediately, ruled by this law and begging his attention. He blinked as he approached the window.

The glass looked oddly reflective in a manner he had never quite known it to before. It was enough to make him shiver again. And he lowered his fingertips to the windowsill with nails that clicked lightly against the wood. The cold touch was enough to make him bristle and his vision seemed blinded by the white which came so steadily about the darkness before him.

Had he not been lucid, perhaps he might have assumed them at one time to be like the stars falling from the sky and to the ground. He had been told that once, when he was younger and more hopeful of something of miracles and life more brilliant than the painful one he'd been ensnared in. And his cage mate had painted the world to be a mystery of wondrous things—he'd spoken of school, of the stars and snowflakes, of mountains and trees, of a sky with a beautiful moon which lit the world in silver and white and blue. He'd reminded Yami that there was more within the world than the sterile gray walls of the underground lab. He'd painted pictures with his words and told him what he knew of the experiences Yami himself was missing.

He'd told him about school. He'd told him about running in a pack. He'd told him about the love of a mother and the bond between littermates. He'd told him of howling with a pack. He'd told him of loyalty and defending one another. He'd spoken of lush green grass in the summer and the way the leaves turned colors during fall.

Yami had lived many of these memories through this wolf. He had lived them through their conversations. And he'd experienced a few of those things only by his being there.

But it had done nothing to fully prepare Yami for it all. Things outside of the lab had been harsh and bright and terrible and loud. The lab had been mostly quiet for him. He'd been secluded, though why he had not been entirely sure. Perhaps he had been sick more often than he remembered. Such a thing was possible, he was sure…

Yami leaned forward against the glass, eyes darkening. In his reflection his gaze was hideous, like blood, with the skin beneath his eyes hanging low and scrubbed dark as if with charcoal. He licked his lips and leaned forward further.

And he wished, for only a moment, that the glass might break and cut him and he might awaken back beneath the earth. Maybe then the other would be back and he would be able to pretend and—

He had not left him, however.

Yami knew this.

Whenever he healed…

Whenever he felt he might die, the wolf pleaded with him. He'd whisper about sacrifice and that now was not his time. He'd tell him to try again, to rise to his paws. He'd tell him to get up again and to defeat that which had formerly beaten him.

He was as persistent as one could ever hope to be. He was powerful. He was threatening. He was a monster that the men in those labs had not quite anticipated. And they all knew it. The green-eyed wolf, Yugi himself, Annie before him, Aki and Marik as well.

Avoidance changed nothing.

Yami tapped his nail against the glass. The sharp clacking made his ears ring. And he wondered again if somehow the world that had offered him both his cage mate and Yugi now was perhaps defective. He wondered if it worshipped as a lowly mortal might a deity and so somehow chose who it might give easy life to.

Or perhaps it was simply that Yami himself was unworthy of such a thing. In the end, however, he doubted it truly mattered. He would need simply to navigate around his portion of a life perhaps unwanted.

He blinked and clicked his nail again. He wondered if the gods thought much of the internal queries their subjects often posed. Yet he could not see Obelisk or Slifer or Ra curious in the slightest. He could not imagine that they might be listening and thinking more on the thoughts he could not stomach. Had they, he was sure he would have heard more than ever about the stupidity of his own inquiries and doubts.

Ra especially would have something to say to him in some manner. She was, after all, the one which lacked tact the most. She was the one who so often spoke without thought and cared little for the repercussions of her words. She was the one who understood the least what was right to say and show while her siblings expressed their knowledge of such more than ever.

They knew better than to say such things as what Ra often did. He looked around for a moment, eyes narrowing further before he shook his head slowly. Then he blinked, searching the darkness and the cold air beyond the window where the earth seemed terribly covered and suffocated in white.

"Yami?"

He blinked and turned his head, looking over his shoulder and tilting his head. Behind him Yugi was standing, dressed in his usual pajamas the color of light baby blue a few shades lesser than that of his walls. The small teen had hair that had been mussed from sleep, his bangs scattered about and his forelock scrunched up and knotted. His shoulders were slumped with tiredness and his eyes were huge as he blinked back at him.

"Am I awake?"

Yugi blinked at him as if he were a strange animal he did not quite know how to explain the existence of. "Do you dream about me often?" he asked instead, in a tone that Yami had never recognized him to use.

Yami watched him for a long moment. His nails clicked against the metal. And it burned with how cold it was. He tilted his head further, staring at him more pointedly. "No." He looked away after a moment, clenching his fingers and leaning his weight into his hands. "I've just been having really weird…ones lately. Nightmares, maybe."

Yugi gave him something of a startled look. "Nightmares with me in them?" he asked, furrowing his brows. "Or just weird dreams with me in them?"

Yami watched him from the reflection he cast in the window. He narrowed his eyes further and scraped his nails against the metal of the bottom of the window pane for a long handful of seconds. And then he looked over at Yugi again, neck aching as he considered him.

"The gods like to talk to me wearing your face."

Yugi blinked and then stiffened before letting out a somewhat sharp breath. "Morrigan…changed into you or altered her appearance to look like you once in order to get me to follow her away from a hunter." He looked down after a moment and then towards Yami again. "I think she knew I wouldn't have followed her otherwise."

And again Yami thought of whatever bond it was that they shared. He couldn't understand how it was that they might be so easily influenced by each other. Surely that was not as an alpha-beta connection was truly meant to be? Wolves were meant to be self-reliant and loyal and capable on their own as well as social. They were meant to be able to live on their own and care for themselves without the help of others.

"Ra knows I won't speak to her on her own."

Yugi tilted his head and frowned. "Why not?"

Yami was too exhausted to think to filter his words, drawing in a deep breath and shaking his head. "She speaks in too many portents and half-truths."

"Portents and half-truths?" Yugi echoed, eyes stretching wide in surprise. Yami could see the glittering shades of blue within his gaze even in the dim light and somehow it was comforting against the cold. Ra had always made his eyes more blue than violet. It was the reality of the god that one could not always mimic the form and mannerisms of another so entirely as necessary. And they often exuded their auras too powerfully to be able to act beneath the guise of another.

And Ra herself did not care to speak as a mortal did. Things ran in black and white for her. There was no gray. In the grand scheme of things, she was the most simplistic of the three of them. And she had no sympathy for them, nor a sense of affection to be found. She was as she was, a goddess who cared but did not show love in more than giving life.

And now she so often haunted Yami's dreams.

She wished to tell him things that he refused to consider. She wished to explain things he would rather ignore. And she wanted more than anything to make him face something he did not care to. And so Yami had often shunned her until she had chosen to wear Yugi's face for the sake of speaking to him. And while Yami had known this would come, he had often fallen for it all the same. He would be desperate to speak to Yugi in any way he could, though he knew himself to be deceived and asleep. And it made it worse to wake to Yugi oblivious and wondering at his frustration and oftentimes cold shoulder.

And Yami hated himself for such reactions. But he could never be sure and it was something that scared him more than he cared to admit.

"You know, I don't think that anyone ever tells the truth."

The comment made Yami blink. He considered Yugi a moment longer, then lowered his eyes. Right. He himself had never truly told Yugi the fullest of truths. He had told him what he could, never quite lying but unable to fully tell him the entirety of it either. And it killed him to know such a thing. He wished he was braver. He wished he was more capable. He wished that he could have been a better friend, a more qualified alpha.

But the shadows that plagued his mind…

Yami shrugged it off and exhaled shakily. "Half-truths are easier."

"I don't want you to tell me the full truth at all times, Yami," Yugi said. And Yami reacted instinctively to movement in the corner of his eye, not realizing that Yugi had ducked his head towards him for this very reason. When their eyes locked, Yugi straightened again, giving him a warm smile that made Yami feel sick for a brief moment. "Whatever you're hiding from me is your own choice. I don't mind that there are some secrets between us. There need to be, honestly. I want you to feel safe enough to be able to tell me things when you're ready, not because I make comments about half-truths like that. If you feel like you need to protect yourself that way, then do so. If you think you're comfortable enough to tell me, then do that too."

Yami searched his face for a moment. "I do not like lying to you."

Yugi raised a brow. "It's not a lie."

The red-eyed teen shook his head slowly. "It is."

"I don't consider it one so you shouldn't either." He paused, seeming to consider his next words carefully, and then leaned forward the smallest degree. Yami realized he was rocking back and forth on his feet like a small child, perhaps anxious or maybe just impatient. But his expression merely seemed puzzled and maybe more concentrated than usual. "I don't mind that you only tell me half of the truth where it concerns you, Yami. I know most of what you went through when you were younger had to have been traumatizing and I'm sorry. I wish that had never happened to you."

Yami blinked and shook his head. "It had to happen to someone."

"It never should have happened to begin with."

"It shouldn't have. But it did. Nothing changes that." He leaned more fully against the windowsill, then moved to face him a bit more. "I don't think it's wise to dwell on it all over again. It's harder to fight beneath it if you can't push it aside every now and then."

Yugi nodded slightly, looking abruptly exhausted before shaking his head. "I know the feeling. I used to get overwhelmed with the night terrors and I'd get so depressed I couldn't sleep or eat or do anything for weeks. And if I cried it would be hours before it stopped. Apparently I'm good at suppressing until I can't anymore."

Yami smirked. "I run until I'm too exhausted and you fall into depression. What a pair we are."

"It's amazing we're not trying to out-pity each other, huh?" he mumbled, smiling. He looked at the red-eyed teen with brightened eyes as he continued. "We're a little broken. But unbowed, right?"

He blinked and his lips twitched somewhere between a smile, a smirk, and a grimace. He could not tell any longer. "Bloodied but unbowed."

Yugi nodded. "That's about right," he agreed almost lazily. The smile on his face dropped minutely before he recovered. "I think that's basically going to be our motto for the rest of our lives, huh?"

Yami didn't want to point out that their days were most likely numbered and rapidly declining. And it hurt more to consider such a thing for Yugi than it did himself. He shivered and ignored the surprised look that his beta shot him before pressing his weight more pointedly into the windowsill.

"I prefer remembering that to much of my other thoughts, yes," Yami agreed after a moment. He drew in a small, short breath, and shook his head with a slight frown. It was only then that he realized Yugi had come into the room. He had not been there formerly, when he had first woken up. "I slept several hours."

Yugi blinked at him. "Yeah."

He frowned and tilted his head. "Why?"

The smaller teen seemed startled by his question, eyes stretching wide as he tilted his head in turn. He frowned minutely, then mumbled, "Because you were tired?"

"No, why did you let me sleep so long?"

Yugi furrowed his brows. "Did you want me to wake you?" he asked uncomfortably. He frowned more pointedly and then straightened a little more, eyes searching his. "I don't remember you asking me to…"

"I didn't."

"Then why wouldn't I let you sleep?"

"It's past time for dinner."

Yugi blinked and then his eyes stretched wide with understanding. "Oh. Oh right. I'm sorry. I figured I would let you sleep. You weren't tossing and turning like you usually do and you seemed comfortable and I didn't want to wake you. You don't sleep enough anymore."

Yami frowned, considering him. And then he sighed and turned around, leaning back on the cold wood. It was enough to soothe some of the ache in his bones as he watched Yugi for a long handful of seconds. "I suppose you're right." But he had to wonder. Was this truly the reason Yugi had failed to wake him?

"I'll grab you some food if you want."

"You're dressed for bed…"

Yugi blinked, then smiled at him with something akin amusement. "I changed clothes a long while back. You slept through it. And I…I did it right before I decided to do homework in the kitchen."

"I would have thought with your hair that you'd slept at some point."

"I've been pulling it for the last hour."

"Oh."

"Homework is frustrating."

"I see."

"Sorry. I guess I could have stayed in here with you. But I didn't know if you'd wake up if I turned on the lamp." Yugi frowned, considering him again, and slowly shook his head after a moment. "Sorry. I guess I should have just done that instead."

"It's not really something to apologize about," Yami mumbled quietly, studying him. "I just was surprised to have slept so long."

"So why are you at the window then? Are you okay? Or were you just looking out at the snow?"

He raised a brow slowly. "I'm not trying to run off, if that's what you were truly asking." He offered him a mild smile, then shook his head. "I came to the window because it seemed darker outside than usual."

Yugi seemed flustered for a single moment. Then he recovered quickly and licked his lips. "I wasn't asking that," he mumbled, but they both knew otherwise and his brighter eyes flickered away immediately before darting back. Yami was almost curious as to whether Yugi feared if he was not looking at him he might disappear. "Although, I was kind of concerned you might need to run off and get something to eat. I mean, you missed dinner so…"

Yami could see him chewing the inside of his cheek now. He looked incredibly uncomfortable and more than slightly flustered as the seconds passed. It took him only a second to realize that Yugi was worrying about the repercussions of what he had assumed to be a good choice might now present.

"I am fine. I'm not hungry yet." He blinked and looked out at the snow again.

The earth was absolutely covered in it. And he wondered briefly if perhaps the gods had ever assumed something similar might happen with the wolves. Had they ever assumed that they would be powerful enough to take over the hierarchy among the humans and natural animals? He knew many of the wolves now assumed such a thing. He'd met plenty of wolves that claimed that, even while within the labs. His cage mate had never been one of them, but he had warned him of that kind of mentality.

Caution had taught Yami similarly. A mind could easily become warped much akin the manner Marik's own had. And, should that happen, one could never be truly and fully prepared to combat it. He thought similarly of those who lived with tunnel vision. And so many of the wolves within that pack did just that.

How they had even made it as far as they had was a question he had often asked himself when he was with them. It amazed him in every sense of the word.

"You're sure you're not hungry?"

He blinked and glanced at him, surprised. "Hmm? No. Not at all. I'm not hungry yet, Yugi." Then he wondered if perhaps he had missed it when his belly had growled or something of that nature. And that made him somewhat uncertain as he looked Yugi over again. The other boy hardly seemed too upset with the statement, however. He was sure that Yugi would have been frustrated had he heard something like that. So Yami forced himself to relax, nearly closing his eyes with contentment for that brief moment. "I'm okay."

"Yeah." Yugi stayed quiet for a moment. "I'm sorry for freaking you out though."

"It doesn't matter. You were trying to do what you thought was best for me. And I can't say that remaining awake or being woken early would have done me much good." He looked at him more pointedly, a thought forming in his head but dissipating just as quickly. Had he dreamed? He could not remember. "It did me well to get some rest."

Yugi nodded after a moment, lowering his eyes. "I guess so."

Yami was considering him as the seconds passed. The heater clicked on and the smallest hint of hot dust and hair curled through the air. He wondered if his shedding had done more than usual for that purpose. He shook his head after a moment, wondering again briefly if he had dreamed of anything. But it could not have been important if he did not remember it, yes? He had always remembered when a dream held some kind of importance…

"Are you still tired? I'm pretty tired. I'm thinking about going to sleep in a few minutes. I think I'm going to put my study guides back up and lay down."

Yami blinked, a long and slow motion, and then tilted his head as they looked at one another. Did he want to sleep? Was that what he felt at the moment? Or was it something else entirely? He could not tell anymore if it was weariness.

"You don't have to go back to sleep with me. I mean, you could stay up and read or watch TV or something if you wanted to."

He blinked again. "Maybe." It was as little commitment as he could give, but it was still a response. At least this way Yugi did not assume him to no longer be listening to him.

"I'm going to go get my homework and pack it up in my bag and we can go to bed after that." Yugi licked his lips as Yami looked back at him with a small nod. The other boy turned around to make his way out of the room and into the kitchen.

Yami was relieved to see that there was no food in his hand when he returned. It would not have surprised him in the slightest should Yugi have appeared with a plate like that. Yugi pulled the backpack to the bed, tossing it a second later, and plopped down on the mattress.

He sat back with his arms behind him and grunted out a breath, the noise startling Yami enough to blink wide eyes. He had not been expecting him to react in such a manner. He had been more inclined to believe that Yugi might quietly settle for sleep and simply rest for the night.

"Do the gods have to be so frustrating all of the time?" Yugi asked after a moment, turning his head to look at him from the corner of his eye. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm glad for their help where they've offered it. I just… I want to know what the hell is going on as it is."

"That's not for the living to know." Yami shrugged and leaned against the windowsill again, searching his face. Yugi did not seem too terribly upset at the moment. "I think probably the wisht hounds and the black dogs know more than we ever will as far as that goes."

"Wisht hounds or wish hounds? And, either way, what are they exactly?" Yugi rolled over to lie on his stomach and moved to sit up after a moment. The look on his face was curious and slightly flustered as they considered one another. "I mean, I know you mentioned them once but we never actually got around to discussing them. And Morrigan told me about them but…"

"Wish or wisht, it makes no difference how you pronounce it. They're still the same breed of hellhound. They're…basically hellhounds that passed a long time ago. They're considered the hellhounds in their most basic form as far as mythology for humans. They are the ones that make deals with humans in terms of giving riches or luck or whatever it is they might desire." Yami frowned and tilted his head when he saw the way that Yugi blinked and rolled his shoulders slightly. He looked curious as they stared at each other. "What happens is they devour the souls of the humans that they make a deal with and it supplements their lifespan as a wisht hound. It's why Black Shuck is so incredibly well-known and has been in existence for such a long time."

Yugi blinked and nodded. Then he lowered his chin to his arms and stared at him with growing curiosity once more. "Okay."

"Anyways, they are used most often as the bridge between humans and hellhounds and the gods. They're the ones to make deals with and have more information than most." Yami looked down at the floor for a brief moment, then shook his head and drummed his fingers on the windowsill. "And they will often be the ones that humans dream about if they have nightmares about them. They're the most popular because they don't care to hide like the living hellhound does like Valon or someone else might."

"But living hellhounds can do that too right? They can change into…ghosts or whatever… Right?"

Yami nodded after a moment, making a face before tilting his head. "Yes, they can become incorporeal when they need to. They just have to eat a few human corpses and it works out in their favor, I suppose."

"I heard that they don't have any insight on me."

He tilted his head. "Insight on you?" he echoed.

"Morrigan told me they can't see me."

"I'm not surprised. You have to consider that the hunters that have pacts with them would attempt to use them to find a way to get to you. And if that is impossible, then you are safer than you were otherwise. Perhaps the gods like you more than you originally thought, huh?"

Yugi smiled slightly but it was incredibly strained as well. "I guess so…even if they did let horrible things happen…"

Yami gave him a wry smile, wanting for a moment to laugh. Yugi didn't know the half of it as it was. He hardly knew the surface of what it was that they had done to him when he was born. His memory suppression was a beautiful mercy that the gods had given him.

What little Yugi did know was scarring but it was not as terrible as what it might have been before. He did not think Yugi would have been nearly as okay had he known the full extent of the damage done to him.

Perhaps Yugi would never have to remember. And wouldn't that be a beautiful gift from the gods themselves? Yami doubted that such a thing would remain as it was. He doubted that the gods would allow such a thing to happen. The ease of it all would be far too much for them to remain behind. They were not so merciful. Yugi was stuck in the midst of it all, though they might have given him more attention than they would have anyone else. He did not know if he should be grateful for that or to assume that they saw him weaker than any other wolves and so they had to play the part of guiding him about.

But if that were the case, why had they allowed them to cross paths again? If that were the truth of it, would it not have been wiser to simply leave them separate from each other?

Yami tilted his head after a moment. "Let me ask you something, Yugi."

The smaller teen moved to sit up, eyes searching his readily for a moment. Then he nodded slightly, peering at him pointedly. "What is it?" he asked quietly, their eyes locked for the moment.

"Is it just the wish hounds which are blind to you?"

Yugi blinked and then moved to sit up completely. He remained quiet for a long handful of seconds. And then he nodded slowly and murmured, "So you're thinking what I'm thinking then."

"I have no idea what that means exactly. What are you thinking?"

"That the gods can't quite see everything pertaining to me…"

Yami nodded after a long moment, eyes sharpening briefly as they looked at one another. "Yes," he said quietly, slowly, "I have my suspicion that such a thing is what might be going on. How long have you thought that?"

"Around the time that you came back. I don't think that it's Obelisk or Slifer that can see you or me. I think it's Ishizu. I think…" He fell quiet for a long handful of moment and then shook his head. "Ishizu was telling me about why she lied to Marik and made him think that he was Code Name Atem and it made me think… She told me that she had been able to watch me from the moment I was born. She said that Ra had given her that gift when she was younger. And Slifer has told me before that she can't see us clearly, though recently said she can't see us at all any longer. So I…I get the feeling that maybe all three of them are blind to us but Ra gave it to Ishizu and Ishizu is the one who can see everything about us. Do you think that's possible or do you think that maybe I'm overdoing it?"

Yami watched him, unblinking. And then, as the seconds passed, he slowly straightened and stood more alert before him. "I think that perhaps it is possible. But I do not think that I can say yes definitively. If she is the only one, should she die, how will the gods keep their eyes on us then? I do not believe for even a moment that Slifer and Obelisk will remain around us much longer. And I do not think that Ra does more than speak to them through their dreams. So I cannot see that any of them will pay us as much attention as necessary to keep tabs on us."

"I can see that, I guess," Yugi muttered. He shifted to sit back on his haunches and then leaned back on his hands. His eyes flickered about Yami's for a moment and he wondered at the way he stood so alertly before him. He wondered if he was alarmed or if he were upset in some way. He did not think in the slightest that he was aggressive at the moment, however. "Well, maybe there's a backup plan for that, huh?"

"There have to be multiple," Yami argued. "There have to be multiple backup plans."

---

When Yugi woke the next morning Yami was already awake. His eyes were on the window and his head was tilted slightly. Had he not known that he was simply watching the snow drifting across the sky he might have worried he was going to leave at any second. But then the red-eyed teen had paused and turned his head, regarding him for a brief second, and the unease inside of him seemed to settle as he licked his lips and looked away.

"So, what do you think? Pancakes for breakfast or something a little bit healthier?" Yugi asked, teasing him, but the look that Yami returned him was something almost cold and sharp. The red-eyed boy looked down after a moment, then shrugged, and mumbled something that sounded like noncommittal affirmation. "Is there something else that you would want instead? I'll make something else if that's what you want, Yami."

The other boy shook his head again. "It doesn't matter. Pancakes are fine."

Yugi hesitated for a long moment, moving to swing his legs over the side of the mattress and stand up. He dusted himself off as if there were some sense of weight and frustration which he might brush away from himself despite the fact that the red-eyed teen kept staring at him so pointedly. "If you're going to be irritable, then I'm just going to make pancakes and call it a day."

Yami huffed in response. "You act as if you are never in a bad mood."

He paused, turning to look at him over his shoulder from where he'd already made his way to the door. He grasped at the knob, considering him, and then shook his head slowly. "I don't understand why you become so irate like this all of the time, Yami. You didn't used to and now all of the sudden…"

"Things changed," Yami said somewhat sharply. He moved to stand as well now, though he did not assume an aggressive stance as Yugi had thought he would. Yugi forced himself to release the knob in his hand, his grip so tight that it was enough to make his skin burn and tingle. "You do not know what I went through before."

"No, I don't." Yugi drew in a deep breath, then exhaled slowly and shook his head. He offered him a small smile and looked down at the carpet for a brief moment. "Are you really so frustrated with me?"

"Frustrated? With you?" Yami echoed. His voice sounded uneasy, tired and somewhat flustered. "No. I am not frustrated with you. I simply…"

"It's okay. It's fine, I guess." Yugi shook his head again, smiling a bit more, and raised his eyes to his. "I'm going to just start to make pancakes again. I mean, if you think that there's a problem or you want something else, just go ahead and tell me before I start. Otherwise you're stuck with them."

Yami was quiet for a moment. They stared at one another until finally his red eyes lowered downward to the carpet and he tilted his head slightly away from him in turn. "Pancakes are fine. Thank you, Yugi," he muttered after what felt like a lifetime. Yugi considered him a moment longer, thinking for a brief second that he should stop before he might speak another word to him. Yami would become frustrated and annoyed again and that was not what he truly cared to see.

So he turned on his heel, opened the door, and padded quickly into the kitchen again. He picked out the metal bowl, the box of pancake mix, and grabbed the skillet he used so often for it. He got the pancake mix, poured in some water, stirred it together, and turned the dial for the stove. The flames were soft and bright, white and blue. And Yugi waited a moment longer before setting the skillet on it and scooping a spoonful of batter into it. The immediate hiss and sizzle was comforting for a moment as he leaned against the counter.

When he looked over his shoulder, Yami was taking a seat at the table. He did not look up at him, nor did he seem inclined to speak. He looked incredibly uncomfortable, his shoulders slightly raised as if to shield his throat again. He did not seem happy, nor comfortable in the least, and he appeared more upset than Yugi had ever quite seen him. He had isolated the distress, however. Instinctively he had smothered much of it, as if he expected Yugi to speak against him in some manner.

He licked his lips and glanced towards the red-eyed teen once more. The blue-violet-eyed boy watched him as he exhaled somewhat loudly and finally looked over his shoulder. He turned away, facing the skillet, and flipped the pancake once more. He leaned against the counter again, narrowing his eyes, and shook his head after a moment.

Yami did not have a reason to be so upset. Yugi honestly did not understand what it was that had caused him to become so frustrated. He was healthy. He was no longer hurt. He was no longer being tortured. He had no reason to argue or fight with him. Yugi couldn't list a reason why he might be so upset with him as it was. Had he said something? Had he done something?

Yugi might have called it manipulative or abusive had there been something between them beyond their friendship. And, when he glanced at Yami again, he wondered for a split second if there was ever going to be something past this.

Yami was so damaged. He knew that. He understood it. Yami feared a lot of things. And he became angry due to this. He would most likely turn on him if he was scared enough.

What had Fuwa done to him exactly?

Yami was more skittish than anything. It was odd to consider. He had always been that silent little shadow that followed him about. He had been soft-spoken. He had been calm and quiet. And he would trail him like a ghost before he did anything else. When he spoke it was soft but meaningful. Now he sounded harsher and almost as if he was too tired. He spoke as if his temper were beneath the surface of each word. He seemed perhaps more fearful than anything else, though.

And Yugi wondered what it was that the gods had been telling him. He had said that Ra visited him often in the form of his face, right? She would take his face to speak to Yami. And then she would speak to him in whatever manner it was that she chose. And Yugi had to wonder if perhaps he was so upset because of something that she had been saying to him formerly.

Had she perhaps visited him again that night?

Or was there something else entirely?

Yugi shrugged this thought off, however, and turned back to the pancake. He flipped it onto the plate and worked on the next with a shake of his head. The pastry was half-burned, he noticed. He had been thinking too long about this and not paying enough attention to the necessity of keeping his food from burning. He shook his head again and looked down, flustered and annoyed with this new development.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Yami kept his eyes on him for only a moment longer. Then he looked immediately away again. "Yes," he grunted, but he seemed more flustered than anything else. And Yugi thought he appeared almost feverish in the way he looked back at him from beneath his lashes and picked at his food.

"Are you sure that you're okay? You promise that you're okay?"

Now the other boy raised and turned his head, surprised by the comment. He blinked, tilting his head, and then looked down at the plate again. "Yes," he mumbled almost dismissively. But then he paused after a split second. Then he drummed his fingers on the table for a moment. "I promise I am okay."

"Okay." Yugi did not push again, but that perhaps was enough to make Yami even more anxious. Because, when he looked up, Yami seemed incredibly unhappy. He looked, perhaps, even unnerved. And then Yugi spotted his red eyes narrow and his lips twitch as if he might curl them back entirely. The two of them stared at each other for a moment before Yami abruptly pushed away from the table and got to his feet. He reached up and fumbled with his t-shirt, anxious and flustered. He drew in a deep breath and then turned and wandered off.

Yugi blinked, tipping backwards in his seat, and blinked huge eyes when he saw Yami step into the hallway bathroom. He heard it click shut and then the lock was turned and he tilted his head, bewildered and slightly anxious to consider it. Had Yami assumed that he might attempt to follow him or something to that effect? Or had he simply closed and locked the door behind him in order to simply comfort himself? It was possible that he was so upset that he had gone about secluded himself in a similar thought to hide as he had the night he'd woken him from his night terror in which Yami had been attempting to wake himself by way of forcing the Change. He'd hidden under the bed then; perhaps the bathroom had felt the safest to him now.

Yugi fell quiet, feeling sick to his stomach as he looked around for a long moment. The hallway seemed exceedingly long and dark for the moment, as if his loneliness had caused such a thing to happen to him. He frowned and considered it, then looked around before leaning against the wall.

"Don't forget to rinse your mouth if you vomit." It was a neglectful kind of comment, one that made his bones feel cold as well. But he did not say anything else, instead hearing Yami's clothes rustle. He could imagine him tilting his head and turning to look over his shoulder at the door. He wondered if he felt as shocked as he felt stupid at the moment. "I mean, I'm really hoping that you don't end up vomiting though, you know?"

Yugi honestly did not know if it was possible that he could feel more pathetic at that moment than he already did. He shook his head and sighed softly, looking up towards the ceiling. The fact that it was white was probably the dullest part of the house in all truth. The rest of the rooms had a nicer color scheme. His own was sky blue, the carpet indigo. The carpet in the hallway was red-violet and the walls a similar shade. He shook his head and looked over his shoulder towards the staircase door. The walls were a pale color of orange-red, soft like the clouds against sunset. And Yugi was flustered as he trained his attention on these small details but attempted to listen closely. If Yami started vomiting, he would need to know in order to get him fluids as quickly as possible.

But the moments stretched out and he found himself unable to remain there. His stomach was twisting too violently and he was too tired to stay much longer. And so he finally shuffled away from the door, glancing over his shoulder twice more, and headed back into the kitchen. He had assumed that Yami might take this as the sign to come out again, but it took another two hours before he finally came to find him. Yugi had long since settled on the couch, homework in his lap, figuring out math equations that made his head throb.

When he saw movement in the corner of his eye, he had almost assumed he was seeing things. But when he looked up, Yami was facing him. He had tugged down the sleeve of that strange teal jacket he so rarely wore. And he looked flustered and frustrated more than anything. He seemed to debate joining him on the couch, hovering for a moment, and then Yugi watched as he began to make his way slowly to the other side of the piece of furniture. The taller teen plopped down at the end, fidgeting with his sleeves once more and staring at the television where it remained blank and untouched.

Yugi hesitated for a moment, unsure of whether he should acknowledge him or not. He had a feeling that one too many words would send Yami back into his room and away from him for the rest of the day. But he had no idea how many words were too many or too little. So he opted for silence, leaned forward for the remote sitting on the table, and tossed it in the air. Yami reacted instinctively, he knew, in moving to catch it. In fact, the other boy looked almost surprised to have it in his hand when he realized he'd caught it.

Yugi offered him a faint smile, unsure of what more to do, and then turned back to the black print on the page. None of it made sense to him any longer but he hardly cared for the moment. It didn't matter, in all reality. It was stupid and foolish of him to think for even a second longer that it might last. But he did not care to stop either so he scribbled a new answer, feeling flustered. Yami was silent behind him safe for his breathing and steady heartbeat and for once Yugi wished he could not hear the damn thing.

He flipped the page of his textbook, shifting his weight, and drew his legs up to cross beneath him. The television flickered on a moment later. And he could hear Yami awkwardly shifting back to sit more comfortably against the cushions. The sound of his weight sinking back into the material made Yugi all but bristle. But then Yami did not seem to move and the only sound came from his own breathing, his own heartbeat, and the noise of a commercial advertising a new video game and its console.

Yugi hated that Yami refused to speak. But the longer they stewed in the silence, the less tension there seemed to be between them. And, as another hour passed and Yugi finished a third homework assignment, it only occurred to him why the tension was nonexistent altogether. He turned his head and found Yami settled against the armrest. One arm was draped over the side and his chin rested on the wrist of his other. His eyes were closed, his long lashes dark and fluttering faintly as his lids twitched. He was breathing evenly, his entire body slumped forward and against the armrest.

And he looked almost innocent for a moment.

The jacket was a size too big, he realized, just long enough that it seemed to stretch a few inches past his wrists. The sleeves were baggy, the shoulders a little too ruffled. He looked almost like a child trying on his father's clothing. And it made Yugi want to perhaps cover him in a blanket, an instinct that he would have formerly recognized as human but now suspected was much more wolf-like in reality. He had never been one to overstep such boundaries as to cover someone with a blanket when they did not look cold. He was looking at Yami now, who seemed perfectly happy at the moment with the way he rested, and had somehow come to the conclusion that further covering him was a necessity.

It seemed more like a wolf attempting to help its struggling pack mate. He had read and heard on several occasions that wolves would help each other despite dire circumstances in the wild. They would bring back meat for the nursemaid, bring back food for the pups, guard the pups, use vocalizations to shield their lower numbers when one was threatened. They worked as a family unit that guarded each and every member, even the omega that was so often bullied.

Yugi tilted his head and considered Yami a moment longer. The red-eyed teen was still fast asleep and he wondered how long he had been like this. Had it been only when he had come to notice or had it been sooner than that? Yugi wondered for only a moment, then sighed and turned back to his homework. He supposed it didn't matter. Yami was asleep and that was better than him vomiting up his food and sleeping in the bathroom and ignoring him in order to protect himself from whatever small threat he perceived Yugi to be.

He drummed his fingers once. Then he glanced at the television as a small minute-long segment began about the fire that was still being examined. The restaurant had definitely been marked as arson, was the official statement. But they still did not quite have leads to tie it to anyone.

Yugi wondered what it was that Obelisk had planned. The wolf had said that he might take care of it. And if he did, what exactly did that entail? It was a nerve-wracking idea to leave it to a wolf who knew only of his pelt and sharp teeth and the violence of war. Yugi was still half-expecting to find that his friend's father was dead and that they were claiming it to be a dog attack of some kind. The thought was unsettling and he shifted his weight unhappily, drumming his fingers a bit more rapidly. The segment cut away to something else entirely, announcing a new comedy show that was expected to have high ratings due to the director and writers involved. Yugi considered this with a roll of his eyes.

News must have been extremely slow if that was what was coming on.

Abruptly, as if beckoned by his souring mood, the television turned off with an audible click. He blinked, confused, then looked around for a moment. The lights were still on in the kitchen. And the fridge had just begun to hum and rattle softly, the ice clicking together as a new cube was formed. He considered the space around him for a moment, turning around to peer into the kitchen and then back to the television. Had he accidentally sat on the remote? Had Yami put it close enough to him?

He twisted around, looking towards his hip. But there was nothing there beyond the crease of the couch cushion. He furrowed his brows, then raised his eyes and froze.

Yami was staring back at him, red eyes confused and slightly concerned. His brows were minutely furrowed. His head was tilted a small degree. And he looked troubled more than anything. He was not sitting up, keeping his slouched position beside him. His arms were still in their exact position. But he had angled his chin to where he could rest his cheek against his wrist and look at him more comfortably.

"Did I wake you? Sorry."

The red-eyed teen blinked and his brows furrowed further. "Why would you have woken me?"

"I don't know. I figured if you were awake it was because of me. You fell asleep with the TV on, after all. It wouldn't have been something to wake you." Yugi paused, frowning and watching him for a moment. Yami didn't look alarmed, but the concern was still clear on his face. He wondered if he meant to ask if he was okay and didn't know how. He shrugged after a moment, offering a strained smile that he knew probably looked more like a grimace. "So I mean, with that kind of deduction, it could only be me who woke you."

Yami shook his head slowly, though it was more as if he were tilting and bobbing his head due to the sloppy position he remained in. "Not at all. I woke on my own," he answered. "But you looked upset with whatever was on so I decided to turn it off. Do you want me to turn it back on?"

Yugi blinked. "No, that's fine." He paused for a moment, tilting his head again. "I just wasn't expecting you to be awake, I guess."

There was a small steady and uncomfortable silence creeping in between them. Yugi felt small and sick for a brief moment, considering it and wondering at its origins. It was odd that they were so uncertain around each other now. Shouldn't it have been so much easier? At least now he was more used to his silence and his steady mannerisms. And Yami should have been used to his more giving nature and slightly flustered acknowledgments when he asked his attention. That was the truth of it, wasn't it? They should have been capable of being around each other without such an issue …

"I am sorry for acting this way."

Yugi blinked and his eyes stretched wide. Yami was looking away now, at the crease of the cushions with furrowed brows. He looked exhausted, more than a little bit so, and he seemed to be curling in on himself as the shadows drifted across his darker gaze.

"I do not know what came over me. And I apologize for taking it out on you so often."

"Taking it out on…?" The smaller teen snorted loudly, then shook his head and raised a brow. "Yami, that's stupid. If you think about it, who else are you going to take it out on? I'm the only one here, after all. So I don't know who else you might take it out on. It's not like my grandpa or mom is going to stick around long enough for you to take your frustrations out on them."

Yami blinked and now his red eyes focused on him. "I should not be taking my frustrations out on anyone is my point, Yugi." His voice had grown sour, perhaps bitter, and he moved to sit up. He did not assume his usual position, straight-backed and almost regal, and instead kept one arm braced on the armrest with his nails curled inward towards the fabric and his other hand on his thigh. "It's not right. I shouldn't be doing this. I didn't used to do this."

Yugi frowned at him, tilting his head. "I don't remember being troubled by it. I mean, everyone does it. If you're going to get upset, I would rather you take it out on me than keep it bottled up."

"That's not healthy."

"Neither is you keeping it suppressed, Yami."

The red-eyed boy stared at him for a long moment. Then he leaned back into the cushions and tipped his head towards him. It was a rolling action, one which exposed much of his neck before his chin tilted downward and Yami was eyeing him from beneath his long lashes with something of a skeptical and annoyed expression. "Do you do this on purpose?"

"Do what on purpose?"

"Miss the point."

"Sometimes. I have a selective tolerance for bullshit."

Yami smirked, then chuckled and smiled at him playfully. "Is that what it is?"

"I think so. I could be wrong. But I'm detecting a lot of bullshit coming from your direction."

He seemed to relax at the friendly tone, smiling at him a bit more genuinely, with warmth that seemed to surpass the amusement in his eyes. "Maybe just a little bit," he agreed, closing his eyes again. "But I truly am sorry. I don't know why I keep getting so nasty with you like this. You don't deserve it."

"I wanted to ask you something, Yami…and you're fine to veto answering if you would like."

His red eyes snapped open again, burning into his with alarm before he sat up and twisted enough to face him with his head tilted and his body half-raised into a more alert state. He was staring at him as if he might have a knife ready to gouge in his side, as if he expected him to launch himself at him and he needed to be ready to get up and flee at any opportunity. But he also looked more annoyed than anything, the amusement washed away, and his muscles locked with the nervous, uncomfortable anticipation that Yugi knew all too well.

"Ask away."

Yugi hesitated. "I'm telling you that you're free to ignore it and say you don't want to answer. You realize that, right?" he requested quietly, searching his face rapidly. "You know that, don't you? I promise I won't hold it against you if you decide not to answer. I don't want you to be upset."

Yami shook his head. "And I'm telling you to ask your question."

The smaller teen smiled a fraction, then shook his head in turn and let out a sigh. "I don't even know if I want to know the answer, honestly," he mumbled softly. He drew in another deep breath, peering at him for a long handful of seconds, and finally looked away. "I…I wanted to ask what might have happened with Fuwa. I know that he and Marik found you. What happened after that? Were you in that greenhouse the entire time? Were you somewhere else? What exactly did he do to you?"

There was a long minute of silence. When Yugi turned back, unsure of himself and whether he should have asked, Yami was peering at him curiously. He did not seem to be upset more than minutely, a fraction flustered rather than aggressive. Then the red-eyed teen moved to sit up and drummed his nails against his leg, eyes flickering across Yugi's face as if searching for the strength to speak. Finally he settled for looking down at his own hands, drumming his fingers and then curling his nails inwards as if to draw blood from his palms.

"Fuwa found me after I had gained consciousness at the river. But it was Marik who was about to kill me at the time. He found me before I was even conscious. He was ready to rip my throat out. I don't quite remember all of the details of that time. It is groggy at best, but that might be because of my suppression rather than any true missing memories." He tilted his head a degree, then rolled his neck and closed his eyes. "They somehow settled on an agreement when Fuwa found me. He said that he could use a hellhound to get to you. He had assumed me to be such because of my eye color. And Marik said something similar about me while they were conversing."

Yugi was frozen for a second. "Marik and Fuwa… Was Marik human at the time or something?"'

"From what I suspect, Fuwa was able to make a deal with the wish hounds. Due to that, I would assume that they gave him the ability to understand the wolves when they spoke. I do not think for even a second that Fuwa had the disease. I think he simply got supernatural aid in learning to understand us when we spoke." He hesitated, eyes opening into slits. And then he turned to Yugi with a harder glint in his gaze. "I know Marik was not human at the time. He was very much in his wolf form. I saw him several times and he snapped at me each time I moved to get up."

The smaller teen shook his head, eyes darkening. "I would have killed him so much sooner if I'd known," he muttered, voice cold. Yami blinked at him, facing him with something between surprise and wonder in his eyes. Yugi shook his head again, looking away. "Okay, so they were both there…?"

"Right, they were both there."

A long minute of silence stretched between them. Yami drew in a breath, then sighed loudly and looked at the ceiling. It reminded him briefly, with the lengthening shadows and the soft darkness that draped across it, of his cage in the labs. The walls had been concrete on three sides, with metal bars on the inside as well for reinforcement. And the front had been glass, so that he could see the guards and the wolves passing through but contained there and unable to produce the strength necessary to break through more often than not.

He blinked and shook this thought away.

"Marik clipped my throat so that I was sluggish and could not attack when Fuwa grabbed me by the scruff. He dragged me to the greenhouse from there, I believe. I cannot remember if I was moved at some point or transported from one spot to another. I am inclined to believe it was the greenhouse that I was stuck in. He had filled in the metal grates with cement. And he had put in a wall of mirrors a few weeks later. I remember more that he tied me to one corner of the building and not the other. And from the other there were squeals and grunts and snarls." Yami tilted his head and looked at Yugi slowly. "He would taunt me and then he would prod me with electricity. And it would enrage me enough to snap. And then he'd toss me out of the cage I was in and into the main area of the greenhouse. From there he'd open the other doors. And those fucking boars—"

Yugi's head snapped up, his eyes wide and horrified. "Boars?" he whispered, then spat and shook his head violently. He snarled under his breath and narrowed his eyes, the blue-violet orbs growing dark with anger and disbelief. "I'd almost forgotten he fed you alive to those fucking things."

Yami was quiet for a moment. "Multiple times a day if I was lucky enough." He tilted his head. "He would separate us using another of the wolves he'd captured in order to herd the boars away from me. And then he'd nurse me back just enough to heal the wounds. But in the meantime he began to put up mirrors…"

"Right… What was up with the mirrors? I don't get why he did that."

"Whenever he would revive me, I would see my reflection first upon waking. It would twist my thoughts. And it made me imagine that it was me who had done that to myself. It made me aggressive towards myself. And it made me more violent than ever. I was soon so enraged by it all that I would throw myself at the glass in order to break it in half. It is a mind trick." Yami shrugged after a moment, looking away as if ashamed or perhaps too upset to pay him attention any longer. "You know that when a wolf is hurt and recovers, most often it will be in a more feral state. And, if that happens, it makes us more likely to attack the first thing we see. For me, that was my own reflection. And that made me more volatile than ever. Whenever I saw my reflection in the boars' eyes I would lose my mind. And I was ripping them to pieces before I even knew what I was doing. After that, he was putting other wolves in the cage with me—not ones that looked like me, but anything with four legs and paws and claws and teeth angered me. I would slaughter them without thought."

Yugi shivered. "You were in the greenhouse when I was locked in there. That's why the pigs were screaming."

"I also ripped Fuwa to pieces while he screamed like a banshee," Yami dismissed him lazily. "You knew this already though. I know you did."

"I…I'd almost forgotten about the boars."

"What you did not know was that I was killing wolves senselessly." He tilted his head. "Members of the mountain pack… Marik would bring them to the slaughter. I killed each and every one of them."

"But not the American wolves that I found that day when I went to the greenhouse," Yugi argued, shaking his head. "No, that one wasn't you. That was Marik. I know that much. He planned to make it look as if he had been attacked by dogs. He led me straight to the bodies and then fled as if his life depended on it. He knew that I would follow the tracks and wind up at the greenhouse. He knew that I would try to face Fuwa and he was expecting it to be the end of me."

Yami nodded slightly, turning away. "Fuwa had plans to skin you and use your pelt as a trophy. I suppose, each time you healed and came back to life, he would skin you again and again. It would be his own personal farm of white fur skins."

Yugi trembled, disgusted, but then looked at him with a horrified expression. "He… He didn't…?"

The red-eyed teen blinked and turned to him, tilting his head for a moment before slowly shaking it. "No, no, it was not done to me. He simply wanted to use me to butcher you. He wanted me in a feral state so that I could weaken you and then he could skin you after he'd managed to separate me from you. He was not stupid enough to trust that I would remain unconscious long enough for him to do that to me. I played possum too often and he nearly got his throat ripped out more than once. If it hadn't been for that damn cattle prod he would have been dead long before you even came to the greenhouse. Although, had Marik not been there either, laughing and warning him each time, I might have gotten out of there far sooner."

Yugi shivered, then shook his head pointedly. "But you're here now. And that's all that matters, right?"

But he sounded slightly defeated and Yami considered him for a long moment before tilting his head and turning away. "Yes, I suppose that is truly all that matters," he agreed slowly. He narrowed his eyes and shook his head. "I am here. You are alive. I am alive. And I'm a little more anxious and messed up than usual. But I guess I owe that to multiple things."

"I don't care that you're a little more anxious and messed up than usual. I only care that you're okay and you're not suffering any longer."

Yami nodded a few times, as if he was distracted and trying to remember what it was he was actually agreeing to. "Yes, yes," he muttered, as if he were in some kind of trance. He blinked, turned his head to look at Yugi slowly, and then lowered his eyes to the cushions again. "I'm okay, Yugi."

Yugi wished he could have believed him, but his tone was heartbreaking and the look in his eyes was one of defeat and so much exhaustion that he was amazed Yami even had the energy to breathe any longer.