Giving Yourself

A Teen Titans Fan Fiction by Jacob McDonald

Standard Disclaimers Apply. I don't own Teen Titans.

Chapter Eight

Mas y Menos ran in a circle around Grundy, kicking up a whirlwind and putting the giant off balance. As he tipped to one side, a wave of water from a nearby fire hydrant blasted into him, throwing him to his back. Bumble Bee swooped in and strafed him with her stingers.

"We've got him on the ropes, team! Just one more push and he'll go down for good!" she shouted, and the four Titans converged on the gray skinned berserker.

As they got in close, Grundy suddenly reared up and threw his fists about blindly, knocking them all away. Bumble Bee landed hard on the windshield of a car, and shattered it. She moaned and sat up, her eyes widening with fear as Grundy charged her.

And ran smack into a wall of black telekinetic energy.

Grundy stumbled once, then twice, then looked back over his shoulder. As he turned, trying to see what had hit him in the back, Bumble Bee saw two particle detonation arrows sticking out of him.

"Speedy?" she breathed.

The arrows exploded, sending the giant tumbling away in a howling fit of rage. As he climbed back to his feet, Speedy dropped from a nearby building, firing all the way to the ground. Small explosions erupted all over Grundy and he howled in pain even as Raven swooped down from above and raised her hands over her head.

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!" she called, and three nearby cars lifted up and flew towards Grundy. He smacked the first one out of the air, but the other two plowed him off his feet, sending him reeling and making him even more susceptible to the barrage of arrows that Speedy continued to pelt him with.

"Bring it in tight!" Bumbled Bee shouted, "Aqualad, give Speedy some more fire support! Mas y Menos, get in his face and show him what size twelve boys boots feel like when they're moving Mach Three! Raven, see if you can't get something big enough to hold this guy down!"

There was a brief lull in the battle, and it gave Bumble Bee enough time to shout out, "Titans, go!"

As the dust settled over the street, Bumble Bee whistled a low note and turned to Raven, "I said something big enough to hold him down, Rae. I didn't mean use a building."

Raven shrugged, "There were no city busses handy." She stood next to Speedy, both of them smiling lightly, and casually touching each other's hands. Bee eyed them for a moment, then grinned, "Aw, shit. You two hooked up, didn't you?"

Raven put a finger to her lips, "Shush. Mas y Menos might hear you and have their fantasies of me shattered."

"Never would have… but I guess you two have been spending a lot of time together…"

"Yeah, well…" Speedy rubbed the back of his neck, "We, uh… have to go, Karen."

"What?" Bee blinked at them.

Raven clarified, "We're going back to our apartment. We have some things to talk about, and… we want just one more night to ourselves."

Bee's eyes softened, "Okay you two. Go on."

Raven raised her arms and a black cloud enveloped her and Speedy both. They were gone a moment later.

Aqualad walked up a few seconds later and looked around, "Hey, where'd Raven and Roy go?"

Bumble Bee looked over at him and grinned, "Back to their little love nest."

As his mouth dropped open, she turned and started to walk to where the police were trying to extract the unconscious Grundy from under the four story building Raven had displaced on top of him.

"I don't understand." Raven shook her head as she plopped down on the couch in the apartment, "You just showed that you can still do the job, Roy, and you're good at it… why do you want to quit?"

He hadn't actually said anything to that effect, but he knew Raven could tell. He sighed, sitting down next to her. They were both back to being dressed in casual clothes and he'd put some water to boil for a pot of tea.

"I just… I need some time, Rae. I need… I need to give something back for all the things I've taken away."

"What've you taken away?" Raven looked distressed.

"I bought drugs, Raven. A lot of them. That money went to all kinds of horrible things, and some of the kids I gave those drugs to are either dead or in the hospital now. I used, I abused, and I have to pay the price."

"What are you going to do if you're not fighting with the Titans? You can't seriously want to go work for Queen Industries?"

"No…" he shook his head, "I was thinking… I'd call up an old friend in the DEO. See if he has any anit-drug programs for me to get in to."

"Roy, I-"

"Raven… hush for a second." He put an arm around her shoulder and pulled her to him. She snuggled into his side and let a few tears fall from her eyes, "I told you before that I love you… I'll always love you… but our lives are going different directions now. That guy out there today? The one that fought Grundy to a stand still? That's not me anymore. That's you, and the rest of the Titans… I'm just… Roy. Roy Harper."

"But…" Raven sniffed, "You're my Roy Harper… I don't want to loose you just when I've finally found someone I can be happy with, and not destroy the world!" Raven clutched at his shirt, "Roy… I love you so much… I just don't want to be away from you."

"It wont be forever Rae. Trust me on this… I have to do it."

Raven sniffed once more, then kissed his neck, "At least give me tonight."

"Tonight." He nodded, "Tomorrow we may go our separate ways, but tonight… tonight you're my girlfriend, and I'm your boyfriend, and we're going to love each other and be happy."

Raven nodded, a sad smile on her face. She crawled on top of him, straddling his waist, and pulled off her shirt.

Sunlight woke Raven up the next day, and she sat up in bed, looking around with wide eyes.

Roy was gone.

She saw a note on the pillow next to her, just like the one she'd left for him. Picking it up, she flipped it open and read it.

Raven,

I know this seems really lame, but it was the only way I could make sure we didn't just jump right back into bed and go at it again. I never really want to leave your side, but right now, I kind of have to.

All this shit… the withdrawal, the care you gave me, the fights, the living together, the falling in love, the sex, the self discovery… it's all been the best time of my life. Even with all the pain, and the struggle… Raven, you've become my best friend, my lover, and my everything. Please, please… don't be mad at me for this. Shed a tear or two if you have to, but don't be mad. We'll see each other again, sooner then you might think. I'll look forward to that day, and I'll be happy to pick right up where we left off here.

I'll always love you, Rae, and I'm already missing you.

Roy Harper

Raven sat the note aside, pulled her knees up to her chest, and buried her face in her hands. She sat in bed for the next hour, naked, alone, and sobbing.

Jinx and Starfire were sitting in the common room of Titans Tower West watching soap operas as Robin worked on a case file at one of the many computer stations. The only sounds were the TV blaring it's over blown melodrama, and the swift keystrokes of the Boy Wonder.

Into this completely normal atmosphere, Raven appeared in the middle of the room. Robin paused and looked over at her, and Jinx muted the TV and stared. Starfire looked curious, then spoke up, "Friend Raven?"

"Well," Raven looked about at all of them, her Titan uniform in place, and her hood pushed off of her head, "let's get back to work."