Chapter 8: Fires of Contradictions

Draco just stared at Granger for a moment. The cold reality was seeping in fast. Tonks was gone; she wasn't coming back from this mission, whatever this mission was. He, of course, hadn't been told of the mission; he hadn't even been told of the meeting.

"There will be no funeral," Granger added quietly. She was quiet, and not her usual opinionated self. He found he missed the fire in her eyes as she looked at him. The fires were fueled hatred and anger, he knew, but this unfeeling blank Granger, he hated more. At least when she was her normal opinionated self it gave him a reason to hate her. There was no reason behind this hatred; it was just hatred for hatred's sake. He knew he was the only one who could break her out of her daze since he was the only one who wasn't feeling the same way she was.

"Snap out of it, Granger, she's not coming back." His words were cold. The coldness was forced, since he too, was mourning. But not doing anything wouldn't change her death, it wouldn't bring Tonks back.

In a second Granger seemed to change again. "Snap out of it?" she snapped back with the fires of hatred returning to her eyes. "How the hell can you say something like that? My friend is dead! And so is your mother --" She seemed to cut her own words off. Her hand flew to her mouth as she gasped.

Draco couldn't comprehend what she said at first. It seemed to go in one ear and out the other, but when it hit him a moment later it hit him like a punch in the stomach. "What the hell did you say about my mother?" he asked in a deadly voice.

"I – Malfoy –" she kept cutting herself off as if she scared to finish her sentence.

"Just tell me, Granger," he said in the same deadly voice.

"She's dead, Malfoy," Granger whispered unable to look away from his eyes. "Your mother was killed after..."

Getting sick of her not finishing her sentences, he pressed on, "After what?"

"After she tried to defy your father."

She didn't have to tell him, he had known. "My father killed her," Draco stated in a calm, cold voice.

Granger didn't have to answer, but she nodded anyway.

"I thought my father was in Azkaban," he asked calmly, not letting the topic drop.

"Well, he was," she hedged. When he continued to stare at her, she sighed and continued, "He escaped."

"Granger, that much is obvious," he said in a cold voice.

"Well, we don't how he escaped!" she exclaimed in frustration. "Our only guess is that Voldemort has control of the Dementors." She groaned. "I shouldn't have told you that."

Instead of answering, Draco just turned and left. When he reached the door he didn't bother to turn around when he called, "I'm sorry Tonks died. She was a good person," over his shoulder.

Hermione tossed and turned in bed that night. She just couldn't fall asleep, not even into a restless sleep. Ginny slept in the bed across the room, and her breathing had long ago evened into the deep pattern of sleep. Hermione lay on her side facing the wall, desperately trying to get comfortable. The vision of Malfoy's face kept creeping into her mind when she closed her eyes. He had been so cold and callous about Tonks' death, but somehow, after seeing his hurt and angry reaction to his mother's death, she knew he had been provoking her. But why? She couldn't understand why he had been provoking her, but he was. He even called out his condolences over his shoulder as he left. He was sorry Tonks died. Hermione didn't understand any of it.

Malfoy was full to contradictions. His voice could be cold on command, but he couldn't, or just didn't, shield his reaction to hearing his mother's death. His face had become pale, as if all the blood left his face, and his voice had been deadly. She knew she shouldn't have told him the way she did. She hadn't even had permission from the Order to tell him, but he had made her so angry. It was almost as if she just wanted him to hurt with the news, but that couldn't be it. Why would she want to hurt him? She didn't care about him except that he has a place to stay with the Order.

Hermione sighed and sat up. If she couldn't sleep she might as well go for a walk.

Draco paced around the living room. He tried for hours to sleep, but it just refused to come. All he could think about was his mother, the fact she was dead, and his father. He wanted revenge, but he knew that was something he'd probably never get. He may never get the chance to even see his father again. The two thirds of the Golden Trio that he had to share a room with seemed to go to sleep easily, and he couldn't understand how they could be so calm when their friend had just died, his mother had just died, and there was death all around them. Draco didn't think the cold reality of their lives being in mortal danger had ever hit the two truly.

Draco didn't understand how it could not have hit Potter though. He was Saint Potter after all, with his past and his future as said in the Prophecy. Draco wondered, briefly, if anyone in the Order was aware of his knowledge about the Prophecy, of the fact he knew it existed at all. He felt, suddenly, as if he should come clean with everything he knew and everything he didn't know. But he couldn't. He couldn't in case they then thought he was a liability more than he already was.

Draco had become lost in thought that when there was movement from the stairs he jumped. He swung around to see Granger standing in the door way looking at him. Her bushy hair was pulled into a ponytail while she wore her robes from the day, as if she hadn't changed or tried to sleep at all. She looked tired with weary eyes and a slight frown. She didn't say a word to him, or even really acknowledge he was there apart from staring at him.

"What are you doing up?" Draco asked by way of greeting.

She yawned and covered her mouth. When her hand dropped, she answered, "Can't sleep."

She looked down at the floor then drifted her gaze back to his face, "Look, I'm sorry."

He knew what she was sorry for, but he couldn't help but ask. "Sorry? For what?"

She sighed with frustration. "I'm sorry for the way I told you your mother died, but I'm even more sorry about the fact she died."

He nodded, signifying understanding and acceptance. "Thanks. I'm sorry Tonks died," he added.

She nodded sadly, and said, "I know."

He didn't dare ask her how she knew, but just sighed and looked away.

"I was going for a walk," Hermione piped up after a moment of silence. "Do you want to come with me?"

Without consciously deciding he was going to say yes, Draco nodded. "Sure, Granger."