Halloween. The night of mischief. The night when Death Eaters were most likely to "have some fun". And I was on duty. Although I was supposed to be covering London as well as the small suburbs and cities surrounding it, I couldn't help leaning towards Godric's Hollow.
I was one of the few who knew Voldemort was after James and Lily. I was one of the even fewer who was allowed close to Harry. I loved Harry. He looked like both James and Lily, with a wild layer of jet-black hair and vivid green eyes. He laughed more than he cried, and he absolutely loved being in the air, whether it was someone swinging him in their arms, or he was just being held. He already had my unconditional love and reminded me so strongly of James and Lily.
Nothing suspicious occurred while I was on duty. Humming slightly to myself, but still on the alert, I made my way towards Godric's Hollow, home of the Marauders. Because I passed Peter's house before reaching mine, I decided to look in. Ignoring an instinctual feeling that something was wrong, I knocked on the door.
"Peter!" I called, "Peter!" My first knock opened the door. I realized then that it hadn't been closed. A quick search of his small, one story house revealed that Peter wasn't home. Where would he be? He didn't have duty, and it was too late for him to want to be out. But at the same time, nothing suggested that there had been a struggle or Death Eaters involved. There was just nothing there; no blood, nothing overturned or crooked, nothing unhinged, and above all else, no Dark Mark.
I knew then what had happened. I knew Peter had betrayed James and Lily. He had betrayed us all. Feeling as if caught in a nightmare, I ran as fast as possible to James and Lily's home. I the midst of running, I transformed into Padfoot, painfully quickening the process that should usually be done when one was completely still. There was no longer any confusion about what I had to do. If it was too late to help James and Lily, I would have to get Harry.
I stopped short when I saw the house. In my shock, my dog form slipped from me. Standing there, I stared at the destruction. Crumpled at my feet were the white gates. A vine of roses still clung to them. Lilies and roses were trampled together.
Lilies and roses were the first things Lily and James added to their homes. They had asked the rest of us Marauders which flowers to plant. We answered immediately and in unison. Lilies and roses, we had said. Lilies for Lily, our favorite flower girl. And roses for James' tendency to be melodramatic and romantic. I remember James laughing when we explained our reasons to him. It was Remus who suggested that I thought of roses because they matched me also for those reasons. I admitted that that was probably true.
But those times had passed and horrible events had commenced, leading up to the destruction that lay before me. Only the foundations of the house could be seen. The rest was rubble spread widely on the ground. Then I saw them. The bodies. They were so far apart. James was by the entrance. Lily was almost to the woods behind the house. Almost as if by fate, Lily was covered with roses. Roses were wound through her hair and petals were all around her. Looking at James, I saw that he was covered with Lilies, the pearly petals contrasting with his pitch-black hair.
I couldn't believe that these people were gone. This family had just begun to make its way into the world, and now their flames were smothered, never to light again. In the midst of my misery, I heard the frantic cry of an infant. Harry! He was alive. I rushed over to the sound, only to stop short.
It was Hagrid and he had Harry. I was so relieved. Hagrid had found Harry. Harry was safe!
"Hagrid!" I called out, "Thank god you've found Harry!"
"Well, hello Sirius." Hagrid looked around, no doubt taking in the unbelievable scene, "Tragic in'it?" I don't know why, but Hagrid's familiar voice enforcing the fact that the three people I cared most about in the world were dead made me break down. I couldn't take it any more, I cried, trying desperately to talk through my tears. I needed to ask for Harry. I needed to explain that this was my entire fault. That I had been the one to suggest they switch and make Peter their secret keeper.
"Sirius, it'll be fine," Hagrid said awkwardly patting my back and pushing my already limp body to the ground. I could tell he knew that what he was saying wasn't true. It would never be fine that James and Lily were dead. Harry needed them, I needed them. I straightened, back rigid, face composed. Peter would pay. But first, I needed to get Harry out of here. I was his godfather. I was responsible for him.
"Give Harry to me, Hagrid, I'm his godfather, I'll look after him." Hagrid looked taken aback by my sudden rigidity.
"I'm 'fraid I can't do that Sirius, I have ter take him. Dumbledore said Harry was ter go ter his aunt an' uncles." My throat closed up, fighting against another lump of tears; Harry had been my last connection to Lily and James.
"Well then," I said shakily, "Take my motorbike. I won't need it anymore." I walked away; heading for home, knowing Hagrid would follow.
"Thank ya, Sirius." With that, Hagrid left. I stood there watching. Then I collapsed, tears falling as it began to rain. In one night, my life had fallen apart, becoming pure hell.
