AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHey guys how are ya hanging? I am not dead and I apologize for that inconvenience.
In honor of starting season 2, I have updated Royal's appearance. He is now even more armored than before. My quest to create the tankiest Warlock in the universe continues.
Helmet- Facade of the Hezen Lords
Chest- Annealed Shaper Robes
Arms- Iron Forerunner Gloves
Boots- Mobile Exoskeleton Boots
Bond- Starfarers Bond
Shader- Nectar Dynamo on everything, save the bond which has Melchizedek Bramble (Say that five times fast)
Yes, I unironically played Iron Banner to get those arms. It was fun for the most part, but if I get hit by one more solo Thundercrash, I'm gonna make the Great Disaster look like a picnic.
To all my American readers, I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. To all non-Americans in the audience, I am so sorry.
Chapter 16: What Comes Next
"I have destroyed myself to do this. They have taken my Ghost. They are in my blood and brain." -Kabr the Legionless
It had been a while since the petrification ceremony and the Vex invasion. Things had settled back into normalcy, for the most part. The adjustment to Eda not having magic as well as the loss of the portal door had been rough. However, the residents of the Owl House managed. Luz Noceda, Witch-in-training, set her phone up on a stand and began a recording.
"Hola Mama!" She started, "You haven't heard from me in a while. It's been a week and a half since the whole petrification and Vex scuffle. A week and a half since I destroyed the only portal home. I had to. Emperor Belos was going to kill Eda if I didn't hand it over. But I couldn't let him have it, so I blew it up with magic fire." She groaned, looking to the side and muttering quietly to herself.
"She's not going to understand any of this. But that's ok Luz, just keep going." She turned back to the phone, "This world is filled with inexplicable magic wonders. If I keep studying, I can find a way home. And look, I have friends to help me." She lifted her leg, revealing one King of Demons clutching it with an iron grip.
"I'm never letting go!" He declared, "You're never going back to the Human Realm."
"He doesn't mean that," Luz assured, quickly covering the camera.
"Yes I do!" Luz ignored him, walking downstairs to the kitchen where Eda was trying to cast a spell. Trying being the keyword.
"This is Eda the Owl Lady, the most powerful Witch on the Boiling Isles," Luz introduced. Eda let out a string of expletives as her spell failed.
"Or at least until her curse overpowered her and she lost her magic. She's doing her best now," Luz finished. She navigated through the house until she found Lilith staring out a window with her characteristic frown plastered on her face.
"This is Lilith," Luz explained, "She's the one who cursed Eda, her own sister. She then betrayed the Emperor to try and make up for it. Now, she hangs out here with us." Hooty burst through the open window, greeting the former head of the Emperor's Coven. Lilith let out a startled cry and slammed the window shut in his face. From outside, Luz heard the distinct rumble of Royal's sparrow.
"Oh, Royal's back just in time to join us," Luz said excitedly. She raced outside, seeing Royal drop a few unconscious prisoners on the ground. Off to the side, Lancer unloaded some of the supplies they had been using, consisting of rope, some traps, and a crowbar, among other things.
"Royal is an immortal robot-man with reality-bending powers, flung here from the far future," Lux explained to the camera, trying not to disturb the Guardian, "Ever since Eda lost her magic and the portal door, we've had to adapt. Royal and Lancer, his adorable little companion, have been doing some bounty hunting to keep the money flowing in, but it's difficult for him to appear in public since he's got such a high bounty and Eda can't cloak him in an illusion anymore. Here, I'll introduce you." She called out to the Guardian, waving him down as she ran over to him. She held up her camera, gesturing for him to take off his helmet. Confused, he obliged, revealing the pale white metal underneath.
"Hello, Ms. Noceda," he said awkwardly, sounding a little tired, "It's nice to, uhhh… meet you?"
"What've you brought in today Royal?" Luz asked, trying to keep the conversation going.
"Well, Lancer and I took care of a few mid-tier bounties. They weren't too hard but they don't pay great," the Exo explained, "We would go for the better-paying ones but those clients won't even look at me, on account of being a wanted criminal and all. We should get enough money out of these guys to last us a week, maybe two if we stretch it." Luz nodded and let Royal get back to his business.
"As you can see, we're perfectly safe," she narrated to the camera, "So please don't be scared. I'm growing more and more every day and I'm going to become a full-fledged Witch. Te quiero, Mama. Te lo prometo, regresaré a casa pronto." She ended the recording. Right as she finished, the front door swung open. Eda and Lilith walked out, with the latter brushing her clothes clean.
"Do you own anything that isn't covered in bird feathers?" She complained. Eda rolled her eyes in response.
"I dealt with the curse for thirty years," she said condescendingly, "You can handle a few feathers. How's the pay-day Glowstick?"
"Haven't turned the buggers in yet, needed to drop some junk off here," Royal replied, "and you gotta tag along. Don't wanna risk being caught alone."
"Alright, fine," Eda said, "Need to pick up some food anyways."
"Sounds like a plan," Luz said cheerfully, "Let's get going." Royal easily pulled their new cart out from the back and threw their prisoners into the back. Luz had once asked him if his strength came from the Light or being an Exo. He just told her that if she thought he was strong, she should meet a Titan.
The group arrived at the market, slowly navigating through the bustling crowd. The events of just over a week ago were remembered, but most people had moved on. Life had returned to normal. As normal as things could be on the Boiling Isles anyway. In the center of the plaza, a new statue had been erected. The stone visage of Belos stared down at his subjects as coven scouts patrolled the area. Royal threw a large, battered cloak over himself and walked up to the bounty stand with the bounties in tow. Luz walked behind him, looking around nervously. Unbeknownst to the two, a hooded figure watched them through a pair of thick-rimmed glasses.
"The Emperor is really taking over," Luz commented, feeling very small as she looked at the statue.
"I see it too," Royal said, "I'm trying to ignore it." He forcefully put his hand down on the reception desk, impatiently tapping his fingers until the clerk arrived.
"Can I help you?" The Demon asked in a bored tone. Royal placed the wanted posters on the desk, gesturing to the prisoners in the cart.
"Got your marks," he said, "I pay you in red, now you pay me in silver."
"Yeah, whatever," the Demon huffed, pulling out a few sacks of snails. He set them on a table behind him, double-checking that they were the right amount.
"Take the bounties over to the back," he instructed, "We'll receive them there." Royal nodded and gestured to Eda. She shot him a thumbs-up and brought the cart around. Now there was nothing to do but wait before they could collect their payment. Luz's attention was captured by the bounty board. Right at the top was Royal's wanted poster. His bounty had been quintupled, now marked at over five trillion snails. Royal noticed where she was looking and chuckled.
"You know, I used to dream of being popular," he joked.
"I did too, back home," Luz said, looking down. Royal watched her fold and shook his head slightly.
"It's not as fun as I imagined," he admitted, "Think I prefer being the mysterious stranger. Not to mention that I think the economy would crash if someone managed to snag my bounty." The clerk returned to the desk, placing the money between himself and the Guardian.
"Alright, everything checks out," he said in the same bored tone, "You're good to go." Royal accepted the cash and the two regrouped with the Witches. Eda was ranting to her sister about something. As they grew closer, they could make out what she was saying.
"There's no respect anymore," she complained, "I was the most wanted criminal for years. They should fear me."
"What happened?" Luz asked. Lilith chuckled.
"Edalyn is throwing a fit because her wanted poster got taken down," she explained as Royal placed the money in the cart.
"It shows a lack of respect," Eda asserted again.
"At least my image still commands respect sister," Lilith boasted, gesturing proudly to a recruitment poster featuring her own visage. Royal grumbled, still not exactly on board with Lilith living with them. Lilith's moment was interrupted when the poster was consumed by a jet of flame from a garbageman, incinerating it instantly.
"Ha, you're a traitor," King sang, pointing a mocking finger at Lilith.
"What do you think you are doing?" Lilith demanded, "This is anarchy!" A new set of posters flew onto the wall, showing a figure Royal recognized. Luz peeled one off and read it.
"The Golden Guard?" She wondered, "Do you know him, Lilith?"
"Unfortunately," the Witch said bitterly, "He always got special treatment because he was the genius teen prodigy. But he's really just a brat. If he's in charge, then good riddance."
"I know that punk," Royal added, "Locked blades with him a while back. Broke his face with a good punch." Lilith snickered at that as Luz clapped her hands together.
"I think we need a confidence boost," she proposed, "How about we find a new bounty to go on?" Everyone accepted, leading to royal and Eda joining her at the bounty board. Luz browsed the available options, looking for a high-paying bounty.
"How about this," she said, snatching one off the board, "Something called the Selkidomus has been rampaging up and down the coast. We'll be on a high-seas adventure and it pays well."
"No thanks," Eda grimaced, "I gotta keep a low profile while my magic is weakened. Besides, there's no telling how long this could take and we need cash now." Luz turned to Royal, firing off finger guns.
"Hard pass," he said, shooting her down, "Again, higher-paying clients won't touch a wanted criminal."
"And he's afraid of the water," Lancer added, appearing next to his Guardian. Eda stifled a laugh.
"Wait, really?"
"No," Royal quickly denied. Eda and Luz gave him looks that let him know they weren't buying it. Royal relented, groaning as his limbs slumped.
"Fine, I don't like open water," he admitted, "Can you blame me? My whole shtick is fire. Not to mention that metal doesn't mix well with seawater." He muttered something else under his breath. Eda stuck her head out, cupping an ear.
"Sorry, didn't catch that last part," she goaded.
"I said I can't swim!" He said forcefully, "You happy?"
"Extremely," Eda said smugly.
"How do you not know how to swim?" Luz asked.
"Believe it or not, Guardians don't usually spend a lot of time on the water. And most of my life has been spent trapped within the Vex Domain. If you wanna take a dip in one of the oceans of Radiolaria, then be my guest." Eda and Luz both started laughing at him. He would have blushed if he was capable of such a thing.
"Can we just get back to the cart and go home?" He pleaded. Eda managed to straighten herself out.
"Yeah, whatever you say," she dismissed, waving her hand, "We still got food to pick up." Eda and Lilith split up, searching for what they wanted. Luz elected to remain with Royal at the cart. He didn't need any food, but he had asked Eda to grab any scrap metal she found. When she asked why he refused to elaborate. The Guardian preoccupied himself by rolling an orb of Void energy along his arms. Luz, on the other hand, looked at the bounty poster wistfully.
"You doing alright kid?" Royal asked, spinning the orb on one finger.
"I'm fine," she lied, before slumping, "No, I'm not. I just feel so awful. It's my fault Eda's in this situation in the first place. If I hadn't arrived, she wouldn't have lost her magic and she would've had the portal. Now she's powerless and barely scraping by."
"Hey," Royal said, taking her by the shoulder, "Don't talk like that."
"But what if-"
"Don't finish that sentence," Royal cut her off, "The most destructive questions in Human history always begin with 'What if'. You can't focus on the theoretical. Stay focused on the here and now. When I was lost in the Vex Domain, I felt like giving up many times. Every time, Lancer told me the same thing."
"What was it he said?" Luz asked. Lancer popped up next to her, letting out an encouraging chirp.
"It will all be ok in the end. If it's not ok, then it's not the end," the Ghost said. Royal nodded at the wisdom.
"We're Humans," he said, poking Luz's forehead, "We don't submit to fate. We shape it." Just as he said that he heard Eda call for him from across the market. Apparently, she needed help carrying some food back to the cart. Royal rolled his eyes and hopped off the cart. Luz watched him go, then looked down at the poster still clutched in her hands.
"We don't submit to fate," she repeated, "Time to take things into my own hands."
"Sturme, report," the Golden Guard ordered, striding into the lab with an air of authority. After his altercation with the Guardian, Belos had ordered him to take a backseat while he recovered. Since then, he had been waiting eagerly to get back to action. He had been honored to be chosen for promotion after Lilith had betrayed the Emperor. He always suspected there was something off about her.
Sturme looked up from his tinkering, regarding the Golden Guard with his unblinking optics. Hunter would be lying if he said he didn't find his new appearance a little unsettling. He hadn't interacted with the Witch much before his promotion, but he had heard some scouts whispering about the things that were conducted in these labs.
"Everything is proceeding as planned," the Vex-Witch said in a neutral tone, "The Guardian may have destroyed my physical research, but my new mind possesses everything I knew."
"Excellent," the Golden Guard said with a nod, "The Emperor wants your new prototypes finished as soon as possible." He was correct, the Emperor had expected an increase in production to compensate for the damage the Guardian had done. Despite the setback, Sturme was well on his way, all thanks to his new form.
"I see that everything is moving smoothly here," the Golden Guard said, "Now, I need to go finish preparing for a critical mission." He turned and left, walking with the same arrogant stride he had entered with. Sturme watched him go, shaking his head as the doors closed.
"How pitiful," he muttered, "A slave who thinks himself the master." He could feel Ignosi nearby, running innumerable calculations. Sturme flexed his new, chrome hands. The Guardian had done this to him. Now he possessed the power to return the favor.
"You possess nothing," Synegorus said. Despite his new body, Sturme flinched as the Mind pressed down on him.
"Forgive me, I forgot my place," Sturme pleaded. Synegorus lifted the pressure of his being off the Witch.
"It is I who possess all that you were and are ever capable of being," the Mind declared, "You speak of masters, you would do well to remember yours." Ignosi marched into the room, ready to issue their report.
-]This unit has determined the optimal location for our new Conflux[-
Sturme could hear the Vex's thoughts in his mind. It felt strange to have foreign voices speaking inside his head, like a cold piece of metal being dragged down his spine.
-]There is an island in the Boiling Seas[-
=Island is rarely visited and difficult to reach, the only obstruction is any potential occupants=
-]Logic dictates that this island is a 93.11053% match for prerequisites[-
-]Permission granted[-
Ignosi bowed and began to formulate the best course of action. Sturme tapped the table uncertainly.
"Are you positive this is the best course of action?" He asked. This was a mistake, as Synegorus slammed its presence into Sturme once again, forcing the Witch to his knees.
"I simply wish to voice my concerns," he panicked, "After the Battle of the Knee, would it not be wise to lay low for a little while longer?"
-]Theoretical: I allowed you to retain your free will to increase productivity and facilitate communication[-
-]Practical: You do not get to use it to question me[-
-]This unit shall require more physically capable assistance[-
Ignosi's thoughts interrupted Sturme's torture. Synegorus processed the request and accepted it.
-]You shall receive it[-
=A new Conflux will have to be set up before this aid can be delivered=
=Something on this world is interfering with our ability to invade=
\Subnote: This had better be worth the effort
Ignosi did not react to the threat, simply bowing once more and teleporting away. Sturme returned to his work. He was currently developing a personal shielding system, similar to the ones used by Minotaurs. His new mind allowed him to work far faster than he ever could before. His new body was barely able to keep up as his fingers danced over the delicate machinery.
Within the Vex Domain, Synegorus got to work molding a third Typhon. It doubted that it would be able to create any more past this one, so it would have to be perfect. The Mind resized the construct yet again, setting it between Pyrikaga and Ignosi, around the size of a Wyvern. From there, it provided the frame with a pair of massive claws stretching from the back of its arms. Two slender blades crept down each limb, with edges so sharp that they could split molecular bonds. Synegorus also installed a second weapon. At a thought, the hands would fold back, revealing a beam weapon that would flay its victims alive, atom by atom.
Synegorus had instilled a part of itself within each Sub-Mind. Pyrikaga was given the desire to cleanse the Universe of inferior life and Synegorus' command abilities. Ignosi had been bestowed with the Minds cold, calculating logic and single-minded drive. This one would receive its hatred and sheer, unrivaled bloodlust. In an instant, the Mind selected a name.
"Sarkarae, my Ravager of Legions."
Once the group had finished with their shopping, they returned to the Owl House and split up to tend to their own business. Eda went to prepare some supplies, Lilith lounged about feeling useless, and Royal vanished out back to work on a project. Eda had secured a bit of junk metal and handed it off to the Guardian. He was now busy working the material into something useful, using his Solar power to weld it.
Luz had something very different planned. She grabbed the essentials, made sure she was fully stocked on glyphs, and brought King along with her. She walked through the streets of Bonesborough until she came to the docks. There, she found the captain of the vessel mentioned on the poster.
"I want in on the Selkidomus hunt," she demanded, slamming the poster down on a barrel. The captain fixed her with an unimpressed gaze.
"You think you can handle this, squirt?"
"I can handle anything," Luz declared boldly. The captain shrugged and accepted the extra pair of hands.
Meanwhile, back at the Owl House, Eda walked downstairs. She had a sash slung across her chest with a bandolier of potions strapped to it. She strutted into the living room and struck a pose.
"Well, Lily," she asked flamboyantly, "How do I look?" Her sister didn't respond, more confused than anything.
"Even with Royal's effort, we're only barely breaking even," Eda said, "All it takes is one slip-up and we'll be going hungry. So I got an idea on how to get some extra money. Wanna tag along?"
"I'm fine, thank you," Lilith said, trying to get her sister to leave her alone.
"Suit yourself," Eda shrugged, walking to the door, "Have fun wallowing in self-pity and feeling bad for cursing me. Bye!" Lilith grumbled as Royal entered the room, muttering some gibberish she couldn't understand to himself. He stopped as the two locked eyes before grunting harshly and walking into the kitchen. Lilith could hear him riffling through the cupboards, searching for something.
Her life had certainly taken a strange turn. Not long ago, she was one of the most important individuals on the Isles. Now, she was crashing with her outlaw sister, her Human apprentice, a strange metal man, and their megalomaniacal Demon. The only mercy she had been afforded was that the Vex had been silent, allowing her to catch up on missed sleep.
"I suppose I deserve this," she despaired, "There has to be some way to make it up to Edalyn and get the Guardian to not hate me." Her eyes caught sight of a potion book on the shelf nearby. She grabbed it, a sly grin crossing over her face.
"She's not the only one who's good with potions," she mused, "I bet they would both like a look inside the castle." She ripped out the page and stood up to get to work. In the process of doing so, she came face-to-face with Hooty.
"New roomie check-in," he screeched in his horrible voice. Lilith screamed in shock, falling back as the House Demon drew closer.
"How's my bestie doing?" He asked, pressing his face against hers. He noticed the page she had dropped and gasped, "Lulu, you're trying to spy on your old coven buddies? I can help! We can find out their crushes and give them cute couple names." Lilith pushed him off and stood up quickly.
"No! I don't need your help," she said, "I can do this on my own. Don't follow me." She stormed out of the room, only to stop in the doorway.
"And don't call me Lulu!" With that final request, she vanished.
"A good friend would respect her wishes," Hooty rationalized, "But a better friend would help no matter what." He took off after Lilith as Royal poked his head back into the room. Not seeing anything, he grunted again and returned to his search.
Out at sea, Luz was leaning on the side of Salty's ship, staring out at the Boiling Sea. King stood on her shoulder, letting his fur wave in the wind.
"When we defeat the Selkidomus and get a boatload of snails, Eda won't have to worry about money for a long time," she said.
"King want a cracker," the Demon chimed in. The captain loudly called for all hands to report to the deck and Luz quickly obeyed. She fell in with the other crewmates, standing at the end of the line. Salty walked down the ranks as he relayed their mission.
"Alright crew, the Selkidomus has been ravaging the coastline for a few weeks now. It was last seen in the Shimmering Shoals. Ye all know the drill." He dropped a large sack of money on the deck, "Snag the quarry, get the money galore-y. We all pitch in, we all get a cut." The crew cheered as he said that, with one even commenting on his many debts.
"Until then," Salty continued, "Keep everything ship-shape. This ain't no pleasure cruise." He tossed a broom to Luz, addressing her directly, "Don't be a burden, sea-squirt."
Luz got to work, sweeping up the crew's quarters and disposing of the trash. Soon after, Salty gave her a scraper and ordered her to clean off the barnacles on the bow of the ship. Luz didn't know why that needed doing right now, surely it was something to be taken care of while docked. Still, she didn't object, lowering herself with a plant glyph to where the barnacles were located. They snarled at her, which would have been a shock if she hadn't already spent over two months in the Demon Realm. She hissed right back, quieting them down, and began using King's horn to pry them off.
As soon as she finished that, Salty instructed her to keep the ship's engine fueled by shoveling coal into the furnace. Luz took one look at it before drawing three fire glyphs and activating them. The magic sparked to life as three jets of flame surged into the bellows. The engine practically screamed as it redoubled, pushing the ship faster than ever before. Salty offered a slight nod.
Not long later, Luz was enjoying her time off with the crew. She performed some strange dance on the deck while trying to pry a large bug from her back. The rest of the crew clapped and cheered. Eventually, she got a firm grip on the bug. With a mighty heave, she sent it over the side of the ship and into the waters below.
"I must say lass," Salty said, pulling her aside, "Ye made me confront me biases. Now, I got nothing but respect for ye."
"Thanks, cap'n," Luz smiled, "You make me feel like a real part of the crew." He let out a hearty laugh, clapping her on the back with his crab claw.
"That's because ye are lass!" The crew cheered again.
"Boo!" King shouted, not entirely paying attention to what was happening. He waved a cracker in displeasure, only for a bird to attempt to snatch it up. The two struggled over the cracker, truly a legendary fight for the ages. Mother Nature herself had to intervene and end the bout by sending a wave into the side of the ship. King was knocked off his perch, tumbling into the captain's den as the door slammed shut behind him. Rubbing his sore head, he looked around. Instantly, he caught sight of a large box of crackers sitting on a desk. Moving quickly, he clambered up and cracked the box open. As he munched, he noticed that the box had been resting on a fancy-looking envelope.
"Is that the Emperor's Sigil?" He wondered, "I gotta warn Luz!" Before he could act, a pair of hands scooped him up and stuck him in a cage.
"Unfortunately," the Golden Guard said derisively, "You won't get the chance."
Lilith paced through the woods as she read off the page she had torn from the potions book. The other ingredients had been easy; Pollux Moss could be found just about anywhere in the Southern Isles, Agenstone had been a little more difficult but she uncovered a small cluster, even Flinx Fur hadn't eluded her for long. Granted, that was because Eda had a small stash that she had broken into, but the details were irrelevant. Checking the list, she saw that the next ingredient would be Fire Bee honey.
Luckily, two such bees flew past, rejoining the rest of their hive. True to their name, the bees were almost permanently on fire. Some said that extinguishing the fire would cause the bee to die. This was easier said than done, as Fire Bees were so hot that water instantly evaporated on contact. The only surefire way to catch them would be with ice magic. Then she would have to move quickly before they melted the ice.
She took a hesitant step toward the hive. Instantly, the swarm of bees directed themselves at her. She drew a shaky spell circle. Instead of the wall of ice she hoped for, she was met with a small ice cube that pathetically fell to the ground. She yelled as the bees attacked, narrowly ducking behind a tree. Several bees slammed into the wood, stingers first. It was a marvel of nature that these trees had evolved to have fire-resistant wood. Lilith slumped to the ground, tucking her head into her knees.
"It's hopeless," she moaned, "How am I supposed to get Fire Bee honey without ice magic? Who am I without magic, without a coven?" Her sorrow wouldn't last, being replaced by annoyance and fury as a familiar voice reached her ear.
"Without friends?" Hooty asked. He was poking out the ground right before the Witch. She glared at him as he extended higher into the air.
"You don't know how to get past those Fire Bees, but I can help," he offered.
"No!" Lilith shouted, "I don't want your help. I told you not to follow me!"
"If I were you," Hooty began, not noticing her hostility, "I would-"
"You would what?" Lilith interrupted, "It doesn't matter. You aren't me! You're just some weird bird-worm-thing." The House Demon flinched under her verbal assault. Lilith turned away from Hooy, holding her arms close.
"You have no idea what I'm going through," she bemoaned, "I have to do this alone, because if I can't… what kind of Witch am I?" Hooty shrank away, apologizing before retreating back underground. Lilith let out a huff and straightened her hair.
"Now, let's try this again," she said, picking up a stick for self-defense. She advanced on the hive, filled with determination. Her resolve diminished somewhat as the swarm noticed her approach. She brandished her improvised weapon defensively as they encircled her, buzzing menacingly.
"I am not one to be trifled with, bees," she threatened, "I am a Witch unhinged." A valiant battle cry tore its way out of her throat as she swung at the swarm. After a few savage swipes, she withdrew, inspecting the scorched stump that was once her only defense.
"I remember this being longer."
The bees buzzing grew louder as they drew closer. Lilith's grip on the stump slackened as she dropped to her knees. She had failed and no one was coming to save her. All she could do now was give up and pray for a swift death.
It seemed that fate had other plans for her, however. The ground began to rumble and shake as something drew closer. To Lilith's shock, Hooty burst through the ground right beside her.
"I'm here for you Lulu," he declared defiantly, "No one stands alone. Now face my wrath!" He dove into the swarm, biting and thrashing wildly. With the horde now distracted, Lilith managed to slip away safely. She retreated behind a tree and clapped giddily as she watched the carnage unfold before her. It was nice to be on this end of the House Demons' vengeance.
The boat rocked steadily as it sliced through the waves. Salty stood at the bow, casting a suspicious eye across the horizon. Just ahead was a small archipelago, with the broken remains of fallen ships littering the waters.
"We're here!" Salty shouted, "The Shimmering Shoals. All hands, get ready. She's close." True to his word, the ship suddenly rocked as something violently hit it. Luz raced to the side, catching sight of their prey. The Selkidomus was massive, covered in light-blue scales. Its fins stretched to the side as its tail thrashed in the water. If Luz had to choose one word to describe the creature, it would be majestic.
Luz activated her glyphs, freezing large chunks of the water surface and boxing the Selkidomus in. Acting quickly to capitalize on her advantage, she summoned large, thick vines to reign the beast in. Her crewmates grabbed on as well, helping her to restrain their target. With a grunt of exertion, she tied the vines to the ship, binding the Selkidomus in place.
"I did it!" She celebrated. Unfortunately, her excitement was short-lived. An explosion rocked the deck, causing the crew to stumble. The vines snapped, allowing the Selkidomus to slip away. Off to the side, Luz could see someone run through the smoke, the bag of money slung over their shoulder. They leaped over the side, taking the loot with them.
"We're being robbed!" Luz shouted. Not one to give up so easily, she quickly gave chase. A quick ice glyph created a small boat for her to ride on while a fire glyph propelled her forward. She could hear the rest of the crew cheering her on. They wouldn't be able to join her, the ship needed to be stabilized, lest it sink to the bottom of the Shoals.
Luz saw the thief on the shore of a nearby island. Noticing that her small iceberg was quickly melting, she doubled her speed. The ice melted just as she reached the shore, causing her to fly through the air, propelled by her fire glyph. She landed on the thief and both of them fell to the ground. The bag of snails landed near the water, only to be swept away by the tide.
"The money!" Luz and the thief shouted. Luz's eyes narrowed, she recognized that voice. She walked over, knocking off the thief's hat and revealing a familiar pale face.
"Eda?"
"Hey kiddo," the Owl Lady chuckled nervously, "Fancy meeting you here."
"Why were you robbing our ship?" Luz interrogated.
"Why were you the ship I wanted to rob?" Eda countered, "You could have gotten killed!"
"That can still be arranged," a new voice interjected. The two turned toward the water where a massive fist made of sand punched through the water. It crashed down on the shore before fading, revealing a figure Luz had seen earlier that day. The Golden Guard stood, holding a staff in one hand and what looked to be a bird cage in the other.
"Hello criminals," he said pompously, "What's about to happen will be relatively painless, if you do as I say."
"And why would we do that?" Luz asked, reflexively reaching for her weapon, only to remember that it had been lost at the castle.
"Because neither of you can use real magic," the Golden Guard stated, "And the Guardian won't be able to save you should you refuse."
"You don't know that," Eda said, rolling up one of her sleeves.
"Maybe," he said nonchalantly, "But do you really want to take that chance?" Eda and Luz shared a wary glance, he was calling their bluff.
"Here's how this is going to work," the Golden Guard continued, seeing that he had them, "The Human will remain a sailor to repay the money she lost, while the Owl Lady will be arrested, again, for robbing one of the Emperor's ships."
"Wait, this is one of the Emperor's ships?" Luz asked.
"They're the only ones worth robbing," Eda explained before turning to the Golden Guard, "Why are you hunting the Selkidomus? It's a peaceful creature and you're provoking it!"
"The Emperor ordered me to slay one," the Golden Guard shrugged, "I'm just doing as he says. A good soldier always follows his orders."
"How about I send you back to your precious Emperor with a few broken bones," Eda challenged, tearing off one of her arms and wielding it as a weapon. She leaped at the Guard and delivered a powerful swing. The Guard neatly sidestepped it and blasted Eda away. She landed hard, groaning as she clutched her gut.
"Wow," he said smugly, "Was that your best? After tangling with the Guardian, I expected more."
"Leave Eda alone!" Luz shouted, preparing a fire glyph. The Golden Guard spun toward her.
"How about, instead of doing that, I leave you dangling above the Boiling Sea?" He threatened. Luz felt the sand under her feet slip away, dragging her along. The Guard suspended her above the sea. Luz gulped nervously as she felt the steam rising from the water. She didn't want to find out if "Boiling Seas" was an exaggeration.
"Around these parts, the water is hot enough to give you third-degree burns," the Golden Guard said cruelly. Without warning, he pulled the sand back, dragging Luz onto the shore.
"But I don't have to be that mean," he continued, "I'm a reasonable Witch. No one has to get arrested or become a sailor. All you have to do, Human, is follow the Selkidomus tracks back to its nest and kill it. Here, I'll even give you a fighting chance." He summoned a sword from the ether and dropped it at Luz's feet, with the blade stabbing the ground.
Luz winced as the weapon landed; if Royal caught her doing something like that without good reason, he would chew her out for an entire week. She looked back up at the Guard, refusing to grab the sword. He grumbled, rubbing the face of his mask in exasperation.
"Fine, here's some more incentive. Go and do it or I drown the bird." He held up the birdcage in his hand and pulled back the cover. Curled up in the cage was the napping form of King. As the sunlight hit his face, his eyes fluttered open.
"Weh?" He moaned, only for the Golden Guard to drop the cover back into place, "Oh it's dark now." Soon, snoring could be heard from the cage.
"Fine," Luz said, clenching her fists, "I'll do it." She grabbed the sword, pulling it out of the ground. Eda managed to get back on her feet, still feeling a little woozy. The two began to walk off, finding a trail to follow.
The journey was relatively quick, with the trail leading them to a large cave entrance. The Guard watched them enter, his mask revealing nothing. The inside of the cave was damp, with a few shipwrecks dotting the area.
"You don't have to do this," Eda said, "We can find another way."
"No, it's my fault you're in this mess in the first place and I'm going to set it right," Luz rejected, "I have to do it alone." She placed the sword between her teeth and pulled herself atop the mast of a derelict ship.
"What do you mean 'Alone'?" Eda questioned, "You were on Royal's case for wanting to fly solo, but now it's alright if you do it?"
"This is different," Luz tried to explain, but Eda wasn't hearing any of it.
"No, it isn't. Us weirdos have to stick together." As soon as she said that, the cave rumbled as something roared. Luz looked down at her mentor, holding up her sword.
"I'm going to make things right, I promise." She tipped back, falling off her perch. She could hear Eda shout her name. Ignoring her, she fell through the cave, unbothered by the air whipping past her. Was this how it felt to fly? Maybe she should ask Royal later.
Her descent was stopped when she hit something fleshy and tumbled off. Looking up, she saw the Selkidomus' sleeping form directly in front of her. It snorted as its eyelids began to flicker. Luz prepared an ice glyph as it woke, looking around the area for any available cover. The Selkidomus' throat inflated as several sharp spines bristled. It let out a deep, hostile rumble. Luz quickly dove behind a nearby board right as the spines fired.
"Go time," she said, drawing in a deep breath. She ran out of cover, charging the Selkidomus with a blade in one hand and a glyph in the other. She slapped it on the ground, propelling herself into the air with a column of ice. She held her blade above her as she descended. The Selkidomus roared defiantly, preparing to swallow her whole. As she fell, Luz mentally smacked herself.
I know I make it look effective, Royal's voice flashed through her mind, But jumping in combat is a very bad idea. You lose all your grounding, all your force. The only strength you have now is gravity, which puts you on a predetermined path. Even a sleeping enemy will be able to take advantage of that. The only reason I get away with it is that I can fly.
Knowing that it was too late to back out, Luz gripped her sword tighter, letting out a guttural scream. A split second before the collision, she felt something slam into her side. She was pushed out of the way, with the Selkidomus' jaw snapping shut on empty air. Looking up, Luz realized that her savior was none other than Eda, swinging on a rope. Reaching the end of her swing, Eda relinquished her grip on the rope. Momentum propelled the two onward, flinging them into a pile of seaweed.
Eda peeked out of their cover, checking to see if the Selkidomus was advancing on them. Once she was satisfied that they were safe, she turned back to Luz.
"Do you really think that throwing your life away is going to help anyone?" She asked, "You helped me find King's crown when you barely even knew me. You saved me from turning to stone. Hell, you even got me talking to my sister again. You're stuck with me, like it or not."
Luz felt a few tears begin to roll down her cheek as Eda spoke. She wiped them away as the Witch placed an arm on her shoulder.
"Now, there's gotta be a way out of this that doesn't involve killing the Selkidomus. Any ideas." Luz was about to shake her head when the pair heard a small squeak. Looking down, she saw a small, pudgy creature pushing its way through the seaweed. The baby Selkidomus looked up at the duo with large eyes. Oddly enough, it didn't seem to be afraid of them, more curious than anything. Luz felt a lightbulb spark to life in her brain.
"Eda," she said suddenly, "Want to learn your first glyph?" She held up a light glyph. The Witches eyebrow crept up her face.
"Is now really the time for a lesson?"
"Trust me," Luz said, "I have a plan." She pulled Eda in close, whispering into her ear. Eda's face changed from doubtful to intrigued to fully enthralled.
"You really think we can pull it off?" She asked. Luz nodded.
"Absolutely."
Above the two, the Golden Guard was entertaining himself by messing with King. He repeatedly lifted and lowered the cover, trapping the Demon in a cycle of slumber and restlessness. The Guard laughed as he watched the Demon pace around his cage.
"You know, you're actually weirdly endearing," he complimented. King objected weakly as he settled back to sleep. Hearing a roar from the cave, he set the cage down and turned to watch. As he looked into the dark space, a light flared up and cast shadows across the wall. He could see the Human dueling with the Selkidomus. With a mighty slash, she cleaved her sword clean through the creature's neck. Its head dropped to the ground with an audible thud. The Human grabbed it and began dragging the now severed head closer to the entrance.
"Oh wow, that thing smells awful," the Gaurd complained, "Why are you touching it with your hands?"
"The job's done," Luz ignored his whining, "Now give me King."
"Sure, he smells awful too," the Golden Guard said dismissively, tossing the birdcage over to Luz. She quickly checked the Demon to make sure he was unharmed.
"Thank you for your service," the Golden Guard mocked, "I trust that you can find your own way home. And try to stay out of trouble. The Emperor is not a forgiving man." He let the threat hang in the air for a second before hopping on his staff.
"Bye!" He called, vanishing into a red streak that tore across the sky.
"Jerk," Luz muttered, watching him go. She returned to the cave where Eda was busy casting light glyphs. Lying on the ground was a bundle of seaweed and vines acting as a replica of the Selkidomus' severed head.
"Well teach, how'd I do?"
"You did great," Luz said happily as the Selkidomus approached the two, with her baby not far behind her. The infant jumped onto Luz, hugging her. The Human cooed, playing with the baby while Eda spoke with its parent.
"This area is dangerous," she explained, "You need to move further out to sea." The Selkidomus nodded, somehow understanding the Witches words. Without warning, it began to retch. With a disgusting squelch, it regurgitated a pile of golden sludge. The Selkidomus withdrew into its cave as Eda gaped at the display before them.
"Titan damn kid, it just gave you the treasure of the seas!"
"What?" Luz asked, rather grossed out by the sludge.
"Selkigirs," Eda explained, rubbing her hands on the loot, "This stuff goes for big bucks on the Night Market." She rubbed Luz's face, smearing Selkigris along the Humans face. Luz protested, only for Eda to pick her up and toss her into the Selkigris. Not wanting to be left out, the Witch quickly dove in, laughing all the way.
Back at the Owl House, Lilith dabbed Hooty's face with a wad of ointment. The House Demon was covered in stings, cuts, and more than a few burn marks. Fortunately, he was absurdly durable. Off to the side, a cauldron bubbled. She heard an explosion from out back, no doubt the result of Royal's project.
"I'm sorry I sent you away," Lilith repented, "It's always been hard for me to ask for help."
"It's alright," Hotty accepted, "I'm sorry for being so pushy. But hey, every friendship comes with its ups and downs. Right Lulu?"
"I'm not commenting on that," Lilith said, crossing her arms. A sly grin came over her face as she eyed the Demon, "Hootsifer."
"A nickname!" Hooty gasped, hardly able to believe what he was hearing. Right as he said that, the scrying potion finished brewing. The mixture began to glow and hiss as the door swung open, revealing a very tired trio.
"We're home," Eda said wearily before tripping over Hooty and faceplanting on the ground, "What's going on here?"
"I have a gift for you, Edalyn," Lilith said excitedly, pulling her sister over to the cauldron, "To prove that I am trustworthy, I prepared a scrying potion for you to spy on the Emperor's Coven." Everyone crowded around the potion as it shifted. Once the liquid settled, it showed a live feed of two guards within the castle.
"Sup," one guard said to the other.
"Sup," the second guard responded in kind.
"What are we supposed to do with this?" Luz asked. Lilith waved her hands eagerly.
"Anything you want. Spy on the Emperor, pull pranks, find out their secret crushes, whatever fills your moat. It should be easy, they're absolutely clueless without me."
"Sounds fun," Edas said, stretching her arms, "Oh man I am in a good mood right now. Here, let's get takeout and draw faces on Hooty." Luz and King cheered while the House Demon shook his head in fear.
"Don't worry Hootsifer," Lilith whispered to him, "I'll protect you."
"Hang on," Eda realized, "Where's Tincan?" The answer to her question came immediately as Royal flung open the back door and ran into the living room.
"Good, you're all back," he said frantically, "Come with me, I've got something to show you." He gestured for the group to follow him before running outside. Shrugging, Eda followed with the others in tow. Once they arrived, Royal created a target out of his Light and set it a good distance away from himself.
"Now, behold my engineering genius!" He boasted, drawing his glaive and holding it above him. Lilith offered a small, awkward clap while Eda and Luz shared a glance.
"Uhhh, congratulations?" Eda offered hesitantly. Royal tsked at the group, shaking his head. He pointed the glaive at the target and pulled a hidden trigger. A ball of fire shot out of the blade, hitting the target and causing it to explode. The others watched in shock as he spun his glaive around and planted it in the ground.
"I realized that my signature weapon was a little lacking in the range department," he explained, "Since you guys need guns more than me, I figured I'd make some tweaks. Touched up my armor too."
"You made a gun-spear!" Luz shouted, sparkles dancing in her eyes, "This is the coolest thing I've seen all day."
"Lancer and I also took a spin around the Emperor's castle earlier," Royal continued, "Managed to snag something you dropped." He held out Luz's revolver. It was a little banged up and showed signs of extensive repair work.
"Had to do some patching up," he elaborated as she gratefully accepted the weapon and slipped it into her holster, "But it should fire all the same."
"Is this what you've been doing for the last few hours?" Eda asked, "Sounds like you've had a busy day." Royal stretched his arms, letting the servos whirr.
"Bounty hunting, picking up scrap, patrolling the Knee, repairing gear," he listed, "It's been a busy week." He finally took note of Luz and Eda's outfits.
"Where the hell have you two been?"
The Selkidomus rooted through its cave, searching for its young. The baby had decided that now was the time to play hide-and-seek. The Selkidomus pushed a bushel of seaweed aside, revealing nothing of interest.
Suddenly, its ears perked up as it heard its young let out a panicked cry. A loud sound followed. Racing in the direction of the sound, it saw a strange silver creature standing over the butchered body of its offspring. The figure didn't acknowledge its arrival, choosing instead to inspect the corpse of its young. The plates on its right arm were misaligned, having shifted to reveal a gun built into the appendage.
The Selkidomus screamed in anger at the sight of its slaughtered young. It charged the interloper, intending to crush them beneath its weight. To its shock, the silver figure vanished in a shower of blue light. It reappeared behind the Selkidomus and charged its weapon. It fired, sending a beam through the skull of the Selkidomus. The creature staggered before falling to the ground.
Ignosi inspected its kills emotionlessly before returning to scouting out the area. It surveyed the entire island in only a few minutes, choosing the best spot for a new Conflux. Without consideration for the animals it had mercilessly killed, Ignosi began its dreadful construction.
Well, lads, we did it. We've hit the big leagues. I got a bot review, spamming the same message.
"REVIEW MY STORIES OR I'LL KILL YOU!" from a Mr. DefunctStoreKing.
I've really made it big, I'm so happy right now. The further I scrolled through that message, the harder I laughed. It was just so out there and unexpected. I've deleted the review, not because it really bothered me, but so that it would stop cluttering the feed.
In additional news, we have hit a new milestone:
TEN
THOUSAND
VIEWS!
I cannot thank you enough for your continued support, it means the world and more to me.
Guest: Ask and ye shall receive. When I can think of another decent 40k joke, I will be sure to add it in.
GodzillaMaster: Those two other Guardians are part of the long game. I said that Royal would be the only Guardian present on the Isles and, well, I didn't technically lie.
davisjustus99: I am full of surprises.
SoalrisHez: "I'm still reading fanfics of a series I don't even watch" Yeah, I've been there. Glad to have you around. And you like my fight scenes? Did we read the same chapter, my guy? My fight scenes suck, the pacing is all off. And the Collector knowing about the Witness, yeah, that's going somewhere good, trust me.
OMAC001: That's an interesting comparison and one I hadn't really thought of. Though in this story, I made magic a Causal power. That's why the Vex are able to use it.
Amity nervously walked up to the front of the Owl House. Every fiber of her being was screaming at her to run away. With great effort, she resisted the urge. Hooty greeted her, but she ignored him. To her shock, Royal swung open the door.
"Oh, hello there Amity," he greeted, "What brings you around here?"
"I was hoping that I could speak with Luz," she answered uncertainly. Royal shook his head.
"Sorry kid, she's out in town with Eda, they got some junk to offload at the Night Market."
"I see," Amity said, disappointed yet also relieved.
"What did you need help with?" He asked, "I can pass it along to her if you want."
"No, thank you," she said, turning away. Suddenly she got an idea, "Actually, maybe there is something you could do to help." Royal nodded and gestured for her to join him in the living room.
"So what's on your mind?"
"There's this… girl," she said slowly, "I've been wanting to… ask her out for a while."
"So you're asking me for help?" Royal asked incredulously, not believing what she was saying.
"No, I came for Lancer," she replied, "I needed some judgment-free advice."
"So you're asking Lancer for help?" He was even more confused now. The Ghost popped out, shaking himself in disappointment.
"Royal, you don't understand," the Ghost derided, "During times like these, the bro-code trumps everything." Royal let out a huff, leaning back in his seat as Lancer turned to the youngest Blight.
"Now, would I be correct in assuming that this special girl is a certain bubbly Latina?" Amity's blush was the only answer he needed. Royal looked between the two, still struggling to understand what they were talking about. Realization finally dawned on him and his optics widened. He turned to his Ghost with a curious gaze.
"Wait is that what shipping means?"
