DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN THE ANIMANIACS!
Would You Like an Ice Cold Pepsi with That?
(int. water tower day)
Wakko
Let's go to Tacos y Empleados Locos!
(Tacos and Insane Employees)
Yakko
Who named that place?
Dot
Mr. Gruesaempleovadohipoes.
Yakko
Say that 10 times fast, or just say it at all.
Wakko
Let's get going
(int. Tacos y Empleados Locos evening)
Person 1
hello, may I take your order?
Wakko
Yeah, I'll take 5 soft tacos,
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Wakko
No thanks, 7 crunchy tacos,
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Wakko
No, 3 fajitas,
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Wakko
No, and 1 nacho mountain…grande size that please.
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Wakko
No, (to Yakko and Dot) you guys want anything?
Yakko
3 soft tacos
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Yakko
No
Dot
I'll have 2 fajitas and a Mexican pizza.
Person 1
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that?
Dot
No
Person 1
Are you kids sure that you want to turn down an ice cold Pepsi?
Warners
Yes
Person 1
But we're having a special: by 1 regular ice cold Pepsi at triple the price and get 1 free!
Yakko
We said no!
Person 1
How could you turn down such an offer?
Wakko
Easy, we said no
Yakko
Do you need us to spell it out for you?
Person 1
Not if you buy an ice cold Pepsi
Dot
Where's your manager?
Person 1
In the back with the ice cold Pepsi
Yakko
Would you shut up already! Wait, don't answer that…
(Yakko pulls out huge bucket and stuffs Person 1 in it. Wakko throws in lighted mega sticks of dynamite, Dot puts in 20 lobsters, and Yakko seals it and loads it into a catapult. Wakko cuts rope and the bucket crashes through the roof and eventually lands on the moon.)
Person 1
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Yakko
Glad that's over with
(Telephone rings)
Dot
I'll get it!
(picks up)
Hello?
Person 1
Hello, would you like an ice cold Pepsi with your impossibly large order?
Dot
(shrieks, and hits phone with large mallet.)
Yakko
Okay, let's all calm down and go speak to the manager about this.
(int. Tacos y Empleados Locos back room- late evening)
Yakko
We are here to express a complaint about the service here!
Manager
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with your complaint?
Warners
!
(ext. outside of Tacos y Empleados Locos late evening)
Yakko, Wakko, and Dot are running toward the water tower screaming at the top of their lungs.
(int. water tower night)
Dot runs in last and slams door
Wakko
(pant) I think we lost 'em (pant)
Person 2
(Pops out of nowhere)
Would you like an ice cold Pepsi with that thought?
Yakko snaps his fingers, shadow appears over person 2's head, falling sound is heard. Person 2 looks up; anvil falls on him.
Dot
This way!
(ext. air outside of water tower night)
All three Warners run out of the door and do that suspended in air thing.
Yakko
As long as we don't look down or know physics we'll be okay.
(plane flies by overhead)
Person 3 parachutes out of the plane.
Wakko and Yakko
Helloooo Parachuting Lady!
(Dot rolls her eyes)
Person 3
Hello, may I interest you in an ice cold Pepsi?
Dot hits her with a mallet and runs away with her brothers.
(ext. small village in China night)
Yakko
Sibs, I think we out ran them.
Person 4
You'd think that wouldn't you? So, can I get you kids anything, maybe an ice col…
Wakko
Don't say those horrible words!
Wakko pulls a large vicious guard dog out of no where while Yakko sprays Person 4 with Essence of Italian Sausage perfume.
The Warners run away while terrible screams are heard from the village.
(int. cave somewhere in Antarctica night)
Dot
They'll never find us here!
Yakko
(ulp) What's that?
Huge silhouette is seen from mouth of cave.
Sasquatch
Who are you three?
Wakko
Phew… it's just a huge monster that could easily tear us to shreds if he wanted to.
Yakko
Yeah thank goodness.
Sasquatch
What else would I be?
Dot
One of those insane Tacos y Empleados Locos employees
Wakko
They've been following us all night!
Sasquatch
Well it just so happens I am one of those 'insane' employees.
Warners
(GASP)
(Sasquatch unzips himself and turns out to be Person 5)
Person 5
(on radio he pulled out of his costume)
I got them here Mr. Gruesaempleovadohipoes!
Radio
Good job keep them there, I'm on my way.
Yakko
Don't come any closer or we'll force feed you bologna and mayonnaise sandwiches!
Dot
And we mean business!
Person 5
Oh, don't worry soon the boss will be here and then we'll see who is force feeding who.
Wakko
You can't be serious, no one would be so cruel as to actually force feed someone Pepsi!
(Suddenly Mr. Gruesaempleovadohipoes waddles in.)
Mr. G
That my good…er…whatever-you-are is where you're wrong. Boys get them!
(Huge thugs come into the cave and restrain the Warners)
Yakko
You'll never get away with this!
Mr. G
We'll see about that
(Monstrous machines filled with Pepsi are rolled in by more thugs.)
Mr. G
Now let them drink the Pepsi!
Warners
!
(screen goes black)
(fade in)
(int. hospital hall day)
Dr. SnS
Vhat ees za matter vith zem?
Random Doc
They have a severe case of Pepsi poisoning, but they'll be back to normal in a couple of days.
Dr. SnS
I vounder vhat could 'ave 'appened
Random Doc
One can only wonder.
(int. hospital room day)
Yakko
Wakko?
Wakko
Yeah?
Yakko
The next time you offer to go out to eat, don't.
Wakko
Right
Dot
As long as no one ever says the word Pepsi again I think I'll be okay.
(Dr. SnS walks in)
Dr. SnS
Good news kids!
Yakko
What's up Scratchy?
Dr. SnS
I got a part time job today!
Wakko
Where at?
Dr. SnS
Tacos y Empleados Locos!
(The Warners stare at him blankly for a moment, scream their lungs out, and begin throwing things at SnS.)
(int. hospital hall day)
Dr. SnS
I vounder vhat zeir problem ees?
El Fin
Wheel of Morality:
Yakko
Wheel of Morality turn, turn, turn tell us the lesson that we should learn.
Wakko
And the moral of the day is…
Dot
If your mother named you Mr. Gruesaempleovadohipoes or Boris your life probably went down the drain at age 5.
Yakko
(blows kiss) Goodnight Everybody!
