My first real crime was insurance fraud.
When I was about five, I started joining my father on some of his work trips. It soon became clear to him that within the very nature of my neurological condition and its' obscurity lied a possible gold mine.
It was very simple, he had explained to me. I was to step in front of a car and possibly retain a minor injury from being hit by said car. And if I was not injured, I was to pretend to be. The injury, fabricated or not, had to be exaggeratedly dramatic with tears, loud cries, and whatever else that would stress the driver into settling on a cash compensation. Or, we'd receive thousands in the driver's insurance money after a doctor confirmed my injuries. Which, due to my history of them, was never hard to do. My father had made it sound so easy and after boosting my confidence, he'd succeeded.
I had no hesitation as I stepped in front of that silver Volvo.
My father had been so proud of me. Getting two scoops of ice cream had made it the greatest day of my life. That con became our go-to to stay under the radar and to claim some quick cash when we needed it. As a result, I got quite good at mimicking other's pain. I would pay attention to news clips of accidents or scenes on TV in order to learn the facial expressions and movements of the victims. To know just what level of pain matched what injury so that I was never selling too much or too little into any given damage. It was a skill that I was able to translate throughout every area of my life. But, it was never quite as useful for anything as it was in my father's scams.
After my mother disappeared, my father pulled me in to his real cons. From forgery to extortion, my father had managed to gain a reputation in the world of white collar crime. Because of this, we often held numerous identities and traveled from country to country living scam to scheme.
In the next few years, we managed to pull off several confidence scams. One of our most successful was a con plainly nicknamed, 'The Miracle Operation', where my father convinced someone of a wealthy status, usually a woman, that there was a doctor that would be able to heal me of my incredibly rare condition if only we could pay their fee. It was a long-con where eventually, out of pity, wanting to please my father, or actually having fallen in love with him, the mark would doll out the exact amount. The next day, we were gone.
Despite multiple encounters with the front bumpers of various types of vehicles and my own dangerous stunts, I'd still never felt pain until Jane's gift. And even then it was…strange. Which, I suppose to a certain degree, should be expected considering the supernatural element of the power. You could also argue that there is something oddly supernatural about my inability to feel pain, but I digress.
Experiencing Jane's gift was almost like lucid dreaming in a nightmare of your own design. Except, you had none of the control.
Carlisle's suggestion had been weighing in the air between us with unspoken pressure. The entire theory that gradually exposing me to percepted pain would help raise my tolerance was as unsupported as it was wild. I should know — I came up with it. But with my life on the line it didn't seem like we had a choice. I knew Jane was reluctant to take part in causing me purposeful pain but her duty took precedence over her own feelings. Which is why we now found ourselves in the throne room with the three Masters and only a handful of the guard.
Jane and I stood across from each other in the center of the floor, as if facing off in a daring battle. The three kings were seated in their thrones, regal and undead, while their guards stood still as stone spaced against the surrounding walls of the hall.
When we'd arrived, Aro had explained that we would have several of these 'practice sessions' to measure and develop my pain responses. Each session, Jane would use her gift on me and increase the intensity of the pain I received based on how well I was doing. Eventually, theoretically, and if all went well, I would be able to withstand enough pain to undergo the transformation process. Fingers crossed, I guess.
"Again."
My inability to feel pain was what made me most fascinating to Aro. Perhaps, if Jane's gift worked well enough, it might actually cure me. As long of a shot as it was, if this did fix my brain, maybe Aro would no longer want me. I wasn't naive enough to believe he would simply let me go, but all I had these days was hope. No matter how implausible. If anything, uselessness would be an even greater guarantee of my death. And what would be the point of going through this whole painful process if I was just going to get my neck snapped some other way. I mean, talk about having no choice.
Aro was practically giddy when we'd started this practice session. Whether that giddiness stemmed from anything less than selfish curiosity, I wasn't sure. Though the session had started out with a light-hearted energy, Aro had grown weary and frustrated as it became apparent that Jane's gift had suddenly ceased to work on me.
"Perhaps, an intermission—"
We must have been at this for over an hour and out of the eleven or so times Jane had delivered an attack, it had only seemed to actually hit me twice. There did not seem to be a clear distinction between when her gift worked and when it did not. Nor was Jane able to control the intensity of the pain I received, something that was greatly puzzling the group.
Basically, this first practice session was not going well. Jane seemed out of sorts from the moment we arrived and I was struggling to even process my own thoughts. The Masters were not pleased.
Marcus was silenced with a look and the heavy command was repeated. "Again."
The very first time Jane had ever attempted to use her gift on me, I had no idea what she was trying to do. I'd felt sharp pokes, like pin pricks, and I wasn't even sure if they actually hurt until after they were fully present and I put together what was going on. The two instances today were as minimal as they had been that first day, so my physical reaction was a lot less impressive than our second time trying her gift in my room. The one Alec had interrupted and Jane regretted.
That second time when I'd asked her to try it again, was the only time I experienced the true greatness of her gift. It was after seeing Felix fall victim to it so I actually knew what was supposed to happen to me. Before her gift touched me, it was a guessing game of how it was supposed to feel. But, in my memory it felt easy to recreate the feeling — but only the feeling. I had trouble recreating the painful aspect of it. When I tried to recall the exact sense of pain and its' touch, I could only manifest it in a physical manner. My entire body would tense to the point of shaking and while the discomfort was evident, it was manageable.
It may have just been my fault that it wasn't working. Not that it made much sense, but part of Aro's increasing annoyance was my inability to focus on the session. I was growing increasingly distracted the more time we spent on this and I couldn't help it. You would think focusing on the fact that the closest person I'd ever had to a best friend was being told to use her gift to cause me pain in an attempt to theoretically save my life. But no. Caius' growing impatience and deepening frown didn't scare me into obedience, nor did Marcus' careful gaze shame me into paying attention. Not even the grimace replacing Aro's creepy little smile was enough to jolt me from my anxiety surrounding my friends' absences.
Jane and I had been about ten minutes into a Marilyn Monroe marathon when we were summoned to this first practice session. Alec, Demetri and Felix had yet to return and it was only yesterday that Jane and I had binge watched all but two of the Fast and the Furious movies. We'd started this morning with Law and Order: SVU until Jane got too heated so before she got any ideas, we switched to Scooby Doo. I know. All of the amazing games and books available to us and we chose to hole up on the sofas in the room and watch a television screen for two days.
TV had been the only things able to keep my mind off of the mission that the guys were on. When Demetri and Felix left several days ago, all I told was that they'd been checking in with the Volturi's allies across the globe. With the unknown vampires that had deliberately attacked the Volturi guards on a mission only two weeks prior, the potential for the trip's level of danger was clear. Sure, the boy blunders could handle themselves but there had been three guard members in the group that was attacked and Felix and Demetri were not joined by any others.
My paranoia was a product of the changing atmosphere in the castle. Alec, for the most part, had tried to keep me unaware of as much as he could. My curiosity, however, was far more cunning than he anticipated. Listening in to the guards that had stood outside my door during the Volturi meetings would usually be irritated at having to babysit my human self. Though, as days got tenser, they would chat carelessly outside my door and either took no notice or didn't care that I practically sat on the other side of the door to listen in. Their discussions were the equivalent of water fountain gossip and provided me with an insight into the lower guard's mentality.
I used to be under the impression that missions were an exciting venture, something the guard members looked forward to. However, ever since that one guard had returned from a standard mission with news of the deaths of Elizabeth and Killian from an unknown enemy, this seemed to no longer be the case. Apparently they'd rather sit outside my door all day then go on a shot in the dark mission. It was a reasonably cowardly stance, but they didn't seem to care what I thought.
This was how I got the details of all the business that Alec would only share a sentence of. He was rather annoyed the day he returned to find out I now knew details as insignificant as the receptionist being replaced and as big as Elizabeth's disappearance on a mission. Once I knew random business topics, he started to let more and more slip unless I asked a direct question. He would immediately shut down and change the subject. Unless Jane slid in. The elder twin had no problem weighing in and sharing all the gory details of whatever subject we were discussing. Though she was very political in what she did share, never giving me more than I needed and never introducing a brand new piece of information. To her, if I already knew the basics, it was best that I understood it. Still, her vivid accounts greatly displeased her brother and had been the cause of quite a few domestics between the two.
However, now that Demetri and Felix had called Alec in on this assignment, the little info I had was simply not enough. Jane, fed up with me asking her whether she thought they were alright or if they'd checked in yet, finally caved. While she never liked to offer much more than I already knew, when the television wasn't enough to distract me she shared whatever she could about their mission. The purpose of this one, she explained, was to find any leads on the group of vampires that were behind the attack on the guards. For their crimes against the Volturi guard, they would be returned to Volterra and receive a formal trial. I had a feeling that the actual trial would be more of a formality of showmanship than of actual truth and justice. Not that I wanted to complain because I'd liked Killian. Though the moral high ground in my head tried to push back against the idea.
For some reason, scouring the globe was a much more difficult task than they believed it would be, mainly due to the fact that Demetri had been unable to lock on to Elizabeth's track. Evidence that most had seemed to take as proof of her death. Though, Demetri did not seem quite as convinced, Jane admitted though was unable to explain her doubts further. They needed Alec because they'd managed to finally track the group down down and the guys needed his help in returning to Volterra with the packages. I made a mental note to add transportation and baggage services to the plus column of Alec's gift.
Nevertheless, the fact that they had added Alec to their numbers did little to ease my worry. His importance and his inability to properly defend himself while using his powers magnified the dangers of the mission tenfold as far as I was concerned. Plus, there were only three of them, and though they were all much more experienced and skilled than the other group, I still worried that they would end up missing, just like Elizabeth. Or worse.
During the discussion, I became increasingly suspect of Jane's willingness to share so much information. She never wished to spoil our 'bonding time' with talk of official business and she shared more than enough to attempt to give me peace on the topic (even if it didn't necessarily work). It was more like she was ranting on the topic, so I asked, more like blurted out, if she were afraid for Alec. She reminded me that he was one half of the most formidable vampire duo in the world. Then, she skilfully changed the subject to a story that proved this point or she'd play a new episode of whatever we were watching. "Alec isn't afraid of anything", she'd say, "and neither was she". She hid it well.
It felt very human of me to fret for their immortal lives and while part of me hated the emotion associated with my mortality, a bell in my head reminded me to cherish it. Although, none of the Volturi were immune to this rising threat either. Both the twins' heightened sensitivity (recently Jane had used her gift in a manner that could only be described as 'willy-nilly' and "unprovoked") and the guards' watering hole discussions made it evident that the stress stemmed from the top of the chain.
Their stories began to show a theme of eggshells cracking under the weight of the Volturi's reputation, which was crystal clear to me now as I stood in front of the Masters. It felt as if this were some kind of de-stress session for them, watching me be tortured. But without the torture they were expecting, the frustration had only grown. Even Aro was flipping back and forth between deep thought and slight comments of irritation.
They wanted me to be their entertainment? Fine, I had thought. I'll just let myself be exposed to agony and be done with it. Except, they weren't the only ones distracted today. The more I tried to focus on the task at hand, the more Jane seemed to struggle to reach me with her gift. Thinking this through, a new hypothesis began to form in my head. Though I had no ideas as to why, I considered that it was possible Jane's gift had an easier time effecting me the less prepared I was.
She had caught me completely off guard the second time she'd used her gift on me and originally, I had no idea what to expect. The first time, I'd been strangely unafraid for my life and even though I'd just been attacked by strangers and kidnapped by more strangers, I'd argue that I was fairly relaxed. Which wasn't a particularly surprising revelation for me, as my fear response was messed up due to my condition; If you're not afraid of falling from a tree, you tend to climb a lot of trees. This made me believe that it was possible that this attack plan, with one gust of her gift after another, was unlikely to have the desired effect. Which meant that we were all wasting our time and I wasn't the only one with the latter takeaway.
Marcus droned from the corner, "this is no longer a productive use of time." I rolled my eyes, keeping my head down, studying the marble floor. I decided to keep my mouth shut a few attempts ago and just let the vampires figure out what they wanted to do with me. I was at their mercy, mercy I was only receiving because the alternative meant my death.
Caius sneered at Jane from his corner, "she has grown sentimental." The finger of blame being pointed at Jane made me straighten my back. True, Jane did not want to hurt me, but to suggest that she may have actually been holding back was ridiculous. I was only human and if she tried much harder it was possible that it may be too much. Though, I had to admit I understood his frustration.
Jane dropped her gaze in shame as Aro's focus flickered over to her.
"Peace, Brother."
"Is this true…Jane, dear." The false question made me swallow a newly formed lump in my throat. Would they punish Jane if her gift completely stopped working on me? No, Aro would never go there. But the way he watched her now was enough to keep me second guessing. Did he doubt her? If Jane had been holding back on purpose, it would no longer be possible anymore. I refused to be the reason Jane fell out of favour with Aro, especially if it wasn't something she could control. But judging by Caius' new finger pointing technique, they wanted something to blame.
Aro was telling her to prove Caius wrong, to prove that she was completely capable of bringing me to my knees without any qualms. He was forcing her to prove her loyalty. Determination replaced shame as Jane's eyes hardened and trained on me. Like Alec's gift, I imagined a path for her gift to follow as it made its way to me. Zigzagging like lightning, it traveled with the speed of a cobra's deadly strike.
It started off with the subtle flow of a headache, only it vibrated so erratically that it slammed against my skull as if attempting to break down a door. Once. Twice. My hands flew to my head and I folded at my waist. And it was over. I forced my eyes open, following the imaginary zigzagging line of Jane's gift retreating back to her and disappearing. I rested my palms on my knees and met Jane's eyes. The abruptness of my reaction may have been what surprised her, as it was the first time I'd done anything more than flinch all day from her attacks.
The smile had reappeared on Aro's face as he gave a clap of praise at my show of pain. "It seems she has not grown immune, after all." Sure. All it took was half a day to trigger what was the beginning of an unlikely and risky process. If every session was like this, it would take far longer than I'm sure they wanted to wait to get to the point that I would be able to handle the sting of their venom. My original theory had centred around the idea that the pain would break down my defences against it, but what if I was becoming more and more used to Jane's gift.
If we kept at this, there was truly no way to know what could happen. The repeated exposure of her gift on my mind could either build my resistance to it or make me even more susceptible to it and other pain sources. After today, the latter might be more likely. I bit my lip, realising that eventually Jane would have to hit me with stronger bouts of pain if this were so. At what point would the high concentration of her gift on my human mind be more than I could take?
The sage minds thousands of years older than mine were already aware of this, but even they appeared hesitant in continuing. "We should discuss, Aro." Marcus raised his concerns, "lest she be damaged in our haste."
Callously, Caius argued back. "Her life is not our only concern."
"I am aware, Caius."
"Then she must be changed. Now."
Marcus didn't back down, sitting forward with the most energy I'd ever seen him exert. "No final decisions should be made today," he insisted.
Aro made no move to stop their debate. Men of few words, it was the most I'd ever heard them say but if anyone else was surprised by the open exchange, they didn't show it.
Caius slammed his fist on the arm of his throne. "This is a waste of time." He looked stubbornly away from Marcus, trying to get Aro's attention with his tone. "Time that we do not have."
"Yet, it is time that must be made."
It was odd to hear them discussing time with a limit. It was, after all, the one thing they had the most of and they took advantage of it in everything they did. But whatever they thought was coming was enough to disrupt that vampiric standard. Whatever it was, jeopardised their eternity and for some reason, it made a difference if I was human or not when that threat arrived.
"Again." Aro demanded.
Both Marcus and Caius' snapped their heads in his direction. In a frail whisper, I saw Marcus' lips move, "Aro—"
Driven by something hungrier in him, he ignored the surprise and reluctance from his partners, telling Jane to "sustain it."
If I didn't have a reaction this time, would Marcus' argument win out? Would they simply send me back to my room, do some research and gather again with a more thorough plan? Or would Aro agree with Caius, that the reasons they had kept me human were no longer worth the risk if Jane's gift couldn't get through to me.
If it did work, would the original plan be seen through? I preferred this, as it kept me human longer and gave me more time to figure out my next steps. Steps that I had been distracted from figuring out. But I was running out of time if they didn't choose to allow my brain to adjust to the experience of pain. Instead of changing me once we were sure I wouldn't die from the transformation, I could be changed as soon as they made the decision. Tonight? I couldn't let that happen — I wanted to be human.
Why did I want to stay human? I faltered as the thought hit me. My defences had become worn as I spent more and more time with these vampires. I'd been adamant in my position of avoiding immortality. I wanted to live my life, the life I'd planned to not plan. Although doubts and denial stung at my insides, my father's death had freed me in a way that I almost felt selfish for appreciating. It was like not knowing what had happened to my father was holding me back from doing anything but focusing on finding him.
Now that I knew, I felt like I could move forward. It opened me up to living a normal life, whatever I wanted that to be — that is, if you took the vampires out of the equation. I'd made friends with these vampires and I'd grown accustomed to their way of life. I was happy here. But, I wanted more than this life they lived and as sad as it made me to think of leaving them, it was the only way to truly enjoy my freedom.
I wanted to be free. And alive. My reaction to Jane's gift was the only thing keeping me human.
I remembered Felix when she'd used it on him. The way his body expanded and writhed with uncoordinated agony. The red of his eyes aimed to the ceiling as they had retreated into his skull and the sedated movement of his head dropping back, limply, as if being severed by the dull blade of a guillotine.
Jane raised her head up slowly, hesitantly, before dropping it in a nod to obey her Master's order. Her eyes met mine as she faced me once again, the familiarly innocent porcelain smile on her lips. But her eyes burned with warning and she gave me the tiniest shake of her head. It was so quick, I was sure I imagined it.
I remembered the sounds that had escaped Felix's body. His groans were the breadcrumbs left behind to remind him that the pain would not last forever. But until it did, he was a prisoner to the Jane's powers and every flinch of his body was proof of that. I had been unable to look away. I had studied him. That had been pain — true pain.
Jane blinked and a howl tore through my lungs. My knees guaranteed bruises in their future as they met with the marble floor. I paired the act with another cry to fit the shattering pain that no doubt belonged to the introduction.
Jane's gift never hit me the same way twice. But this one. This one was blinding, almost too overpowering to even be painful. It was every car slamming into my body, sending me flying until I returned to the ground and the next one took its' shot. It was every piece of bark that cut into my leg as I fell from the top of trees I climbed and every furnace I'd rested my hand on for too long. It was the first time my father showed me a car accident scene in a movie, pointed at the injured character, and said, "monkey see…"
I gave another cry as another wave of pressure was thrust over me and the sound was immediately followed with a crash from somewhere in the room.
"Stop!" There was a tug on my upper arm and a hand was placed on my lower back, as I was lifted up from the ground. The hand on my back pulled me in against a hard chest, as if it could protect me from the mental attack. A hideous, carnal growl rose from deep inside the boy's body. A warning, aimed at his own sister.
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A/N: This is a long note, so I bolded the takeaways for those that prefer to skim :D Check out the sneak peak for the next chapter at the end!
Hello friends!
So! We got a little background info on Saffiya…Great dad, right? Thank you to everyone for your patience! It's been a hell of a month. But! A lot of things are about to go down in the next few chapters. There's a lot of info in this chapter and there's a lot in the next ones, so if you have questions feel free to message and ask me. That way I can rewrite/clarify anything that needs it and I love hearing from everyone :) Seriously, this chapter might be a mess so please let me know if you're just like, "Ro, this is all over the place. Please get your shiz together" because that is very possible right now.
I've lost a little confidence with writing these last two chapters because I know they were pretty narrative heavy so apologies. I am making a conscious effort to show and not tell as much in the next chapter because I annoy myself when I'm lazy. I am so excited for what's coming in the next chapters and I cannot wait to share it with you.
Please keep reviewing and letting me know what you think. Sometimes a single review gets a chapter from 500 words to 3500 and I really do value your thoughts!
Also! I received a few questions and comments about a playlist for the story and it gave me an idea! I do not have one but if any of you have any songs you think match and want to share, then comment or message me and I'll put them all together for anyone who wants! That'd be so cool and I'd love to see what y'all would pick. The first ones suggested so far have been: 'Can't Help Falling In Love' by Tommee Proffitt (Dark Version) from a Guest and FireLily12 suggested 'Young' by Chainsmokers!
, Sweets2341, XOXMaximumcullenXOX, sab31897, raexen, FuriouslyRaging, 1, Kait French, Chamberstaneshia69, MandosGirl, .2021, and Guests! : Thank you for all your reviews! I really appreciate your perspectives and I wanted to let you all know how grateful I am that you took the time to leave them, so thank you! I forgot to thank some of you on the previous chapters so I hope you don't mind my mentioning you here :)
.2021: Hmm, what do you think her gift would be? ;)
sab31897: Hahaha I'm sorry! I swear, I don't mean to keep leaving y'all hanging. I promise, I'll make up for it ;)
Chamberstaneshia69: I know, right! I promise you it is not without purpose.
Guest: You're right, some big drama would be interesting. Guess I'll just have to keep writing and you'll have to keep reading ;)
MandosGirl: 1) Regarding translations, the non-English will often just an endearing term or one of the Volturi's phrases, but I will go ahead and start doing that. Thank you for asking! 2) I do not have a faceclaim for Saffiya! When I write fanfiction, I'm pretty aware that some people like to place themselves into the story so other than a few details, I don't really comment on appearance too much. But I know what my Saffiya looks like. You will notice that Saffiya does have long curly hair, as Alec plays with it a lot. She's mixed race with dark brown hair and green eyes. To answer your question, the closest pb for Saffiya would require a mesh of Vanessa Hudgens, Maisie Richardson-Sellers, and Zendaya to get close to what she looks like for me :)
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Sneak Peak:
"He knows all your secrets," the prisoner sung in the style of a sinful children's rhyme. His eyes landed on me, my form half hidden behind Alec and the vampire raised his hand, pointing directly at me. "And he knows all about the Witch Twin's human mate."
