Chapter 65

It really was him. Cassidy smiled; after her years of searching he was here in front of her; she pulled a pistol out of her pocket and pointed it at him. "Hello, Sawyer." Locke flinched; why hadn't they checked her for weapons?

Sawyer was stunned into silence; Kate stepped in front of him blocking Cassidy's shot as Locke said, "Megan?"

Sawyer snapped out of his daze and noticed Kate in front of him; he pushed her aside and snorted, "Megan is her mother's name." He stared down the pistol coolly and said, "What the hell are you doin' here, Cass?"

Fear gripped Kate in icy claws as Cassidy held her gun on him, smiling coldly at his question; she whispered, "Saywer? Do you know her?" Locke suddenly stared at Sawyer, smiling; indeed.

He didn't take his eyes from Cassidy as he answered, "Yeah, Kate. I know her." He glared at Cassidy. "I trained her." He smirked at her, hiding his terror from Kate; he didn't want to draw attention to her and risk Cassidy shooting her instead. He deserved it; he had screwed Cass on so many levels- but it had nothing to do with Kate.

"Trained me? Like I was your fucking pet monkey?" She laughed bitterly, the gun shaking a little in her hand. "I guess you taught me, though, didn't you? A real good lesson." She laughed again, and it was sadder and angrier. "Ironic, isn't it Sawyer, that I became you? I guess the tradition gets passed down."

"What do you mean, you became me?" He wasn't as cocky and he knew what was coming; his stomach churned at the knowledge that he had forced her into it.

"Surely you know, baby. You left me with eight hundred dollars and a house I couldn't afford to keep. What else was I gonna do? It was all I knew." Her eyes narrowed and Kate saw her grip tighten on the gun. "Those were the best times of my life, Sawyer. Not even what you did to me could change that." She blinked; Kate could see the tears behind her eyes, but her voice was cold and taunting. "Did you ever find him? Read him your stupid letter?"

"Back off." Kate had heard enough; she stepped in front of him again before he could stop her.

Sawyer groaned a little as Casssidy did exactly what he was afraid of; she lowered the gun just enough to be over Kate's heart instead of his. "Who's this? Your latest long con? What you got for him to take, honey?"

Jack , Ana and Locke were watching the three of them with interest; Locke had figured it out. Sawyer was the One that had been called, and Cassidy had been brought here by the Island to weaken him. Jack had been about to rush in when Locke held him back, shaking his head; what happened was supposed to happen, they had done their part by bringing them together, now it was destiny's turn.

Kate's eyes grew chilly and she walked slowly towards Cassidy, almost daring her to fire. "He doesn't take anything from me." She was only a few feet away and Cassidy's smile was fading as she got a look at Kate's face; it was cold and emotionless. "Have you ever killed anyone?" Kate took her silence as a no; Cassidy's stomach turned to ice as Kate smiled at her.

Sawyer was terrified as Kate walked up to Cass; he didn't dare make a move in case she fired. He was close to zapping her, but he didn't think it would work because he didn't really want to hurt her. He never had, but a tiger don't change it's stripes. He was a bad person, and he always would be, no matter what Eko said. Or Kate. He recoiled into himself, pulling away from her warmth, her light; he wsan't good enough and he didn't want to taint her with his soiled heart.

Kate felt the change in him even from a distance; her confidence faltered a little as she felt him withdraw from her, leaving her half empty and cold. Why did he go? Because of Cassidy; she was weakening him and Kate suddenly got it; this was battle, this was the island was attacking. Fury surged through her like lightning; without Sawyer keeping away the dark side of her it came bursting forth from its prison. It was too late to back down now, though, and she pushed aside the sick feeling that was growing inside of her, making room for cold hate as she turned her full attention to Cassidy. "I have killed more than once, Cassidy. You don't want to do it, believe me. It doesn't change anything, your life will still be the same." She shook her head, as she moved even closer; the barrel of the gun was almost touching her chest. "No, not the same. Worse. Every thing that makes you feel bad, every nightmare, every memory; they will be a thousand times worse."

They were all enthralled by her voice and her cool, chilly manner; in a swift motion she had snapped her hand out and jerked the gun away from Cassidy before she knew it. She turned the gun onto Cass and slammed the butt of it across her face, busting open a gash on her cheek and knocking her to the ground as Kate yelled, "Who the fuck do you think you are?" Cassidy was trying to get up, she had rolled onto her hands and knees, blood dripping from her face. Kate's boot slammed into her ribs and she went down again, grasping her side and coughing as Kate screamed, "I know why you're here!" Jack and Ana ran to her side, staring at Kate with disgust as Sawyer grabbed her around the waist and jerked her back while she tried to kick Cassidy in the face; she struggled, jerking and clawing at him until he wrapped her up in his arms, holding hers at her sides until he felt her relax and stop struggling. "Freckles?"

"I'm okay," she panted. "You can let me go." He didn't; she was lying.

"What was that, Kate?" He was concerned, and she spun around to him, eyes wide.

"Sawyer, do you think it is a coincidence that she is here?" she hissed, keeping her voice low. Jack, Ana and Locke were huddled around Cassidy; it looked like Jack was going to have to do some stitching. "This was an attack, Sawyer, they are trying to get to you."

Sawyer chuckled. "Looks like they got to the wrong person." His gaze wandered sadly to Cass, and Kate hated her even more; glaring at Sawyer she jerked out of his arms. "Don't look at me like that, Kate."

"She was the one, wasn't she? You loved her." The magnitude of Cassidy's words hit her like a brick; she stared at Sawyer with horror. "You loved her. What did you do, Sawyer?"

He shrugged, hurt at her judgement of him; not that she was wrong, but still...he thought she had his back no matter what. "I did what I do, Sweetheart. A tiger don't change it's stripes."

"You loved her, Sawyer." She was backing away from him in horror and he let her go. She whispered, "How could you?"

He wanted to hold her, to tell her he was a different man with her, that he would never do that to her, but he didn't; she wouldn't believe him anyway. And he was Sawyer, no matter his wishful thinking otherwise; he was bad, rotten inside and nothing would fix that. "It wasn't as hard as you'd think."

The look on her face was killing him; she was hurt and scared, but she loved him; that he could see. He tried to get into her thoughts. to communicate to her but he couldn't get through, he wasn't a part of her anymore. She turned away from him and ran through the church door into the chapel.

He wanted to follow her, his feet were moving after her of their own accord before he regained himself enough to stop. He felt empty and cold and it was alien to him after the love and fulfillment he had felt with Kate; he was dead inside without her but she had shut him out. The world was gray and bleak suddenly, even the flowers, so brilliant when he held her down among them just minutes ago, were dull and muted; the light had gone from him and from his world.

He hated himself as he had never hated Frank; he had come full circle and now he was the teacher, the mentor. He had completed the transformation into Sawyer; James was just a shadow, a memory. How did he rectify the wrong he had done Cassisdy? Not just the con, though that was bad enough; he introduced her to the life, loved her, and left her cold and alone; forced into conning out of necessity. He had heard the self-loathing in her voice when she told him he taught her a lesson; he knew exactly what that lesson was and it was harsh and hateful.

Jack was putting one last stitch into Cassidy's cheek as Sawyer came up to them. Ana was smirking slightly but he didn't even look at her; his eyes were fixed on Cass and she glared up at him, inhaling sharply as Jack poked the needle through her skin. "Should I turn the other cheek?"

He squatted down next to her, and she couldn't help herself; she reached out and touched his face and he let her caress him for a second; she suddenly raked her fingernails across his face before he could jerk away. His fingers felt the scratches and they came away bloody as Cassidy laughed.

"Damn, baby, if you wanted some of me all you had to do was ask." He touched his cheek again, grimacing, and he looked down at her. "What the hell are you doin' here, Cass?"

"I was in a shipwreck. They found me by the boat, unconcious. You know the rest." She couldn't bear to see him, it hurt her to know that she would never have him again and her hurt turned to anger; a trick she had learned well. "I waited for you in that hotel, Sawyer. I was scared when you didn't show up, terrified that Gordy had killed you anyway so I watched the news hour after hour after hour. Did you know some chick blew her step-dad up the night before? Yeah, she left the gas on in the kitchen and a zippo in the living room and Blammo! Blew him and her mom's house to splinters. I know that because I saw the story on the news every hour on the hour for days." Ana glanced at Sawyer sharply but he didn't notice. "Anyway, a day went by, two: I called the morgue, the cops, the hospital. Another day. You were dead in a ditch. Killed in a car accident. Arrested. Anything but the truth. I never suspected it, Sawyer. I stayed in that room for a week, waiting. When the money ran out I had to face the truth. You conned me." Hurt and hatred wrestled across her features. "You used me.

Jack and Ana were listening, eyes averted; Sawyer turned blacker inside at every word. He missed Kate's light; he was blind without her, he couldn't find his way and he needed her now more than ever because the path he was on was a shadowed and dangerous one. No Eko, no Kate; he was alone in the dark. "You knew who I was, Cass. I never made a secret of it."

Her laugh was bitter and pained. "No, you didn't, Sawyer. I gotta give you that. I caught you the first time but you blindsided me the second; shame on me." She swallowed hard, looking him in the eyes. "I guess I loved you."

Saywer snorted. "Yeah, well, like you said, 'shame on you'." He smirked at her. "Looks like we ended up on the Island after all, even if we don't have the Mojitos." Sneering at her, he added, "If you ever pull a gun on her again, you'll be the first one to go toes up." He hesitated, then leaned close to her. "I did love you, Cass, but I ain't a good person, I never was- and I was afraid you'd get hurt. Gordy would have killed you eventually, or any of the other assholes I dealt with and I couldn't live with that." He paused, looking her in the eyes. "But make no mistake, Cassidy, I will snap your neck in a second if you try anything with Kate. Stay away from her."

"Don't feed me that shit, Sawyer. You never loved me, and you weren't protecting me. You are a selfish son of a bitch and you fucked me until you got what you wanted, then you fucked me once more for good measure." She gestured to her cheek; it was inflamed and swelling into an ugly purple blotch and the stitches were still oozing blood slightly, "And don't you think you should be telling her to stay away from me?"

Smiling grimly he gave her one last hard look. "I gave you warnin', Cass. Don't push me." He turned without another word and went through the door into the chapel.