Disclaimer: You dare accuse me that I own Harry Potter? I plead the fifth!

Plot: This is based on You've got Mail, a story where two cyberspace buddies (boy and girl, of course) fall in love, even when they don't know each other's names. But in real life, they are actually total enemies who can't even stand each other at all. I put some stuff right out of the movie into this, but other stuff I just added. I hope you like it.


It was an early Saturday morning, and the Gryffindor common room was empty. Empty except for one redheaded girl, that is. She was writing a letter to someone apparently. Well, more of a novel, really. Lily Evans was excitedly writing to her pen pal, updating him on very exciting things that happened that week. She was writing so fast that she was splattering ink all over herself.

"Speaking words of wisdom, let it be," Lily sang softly to herself, as she dipped her quill once again in the ink. "Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be. Whisper words of wisdom, let it be," she whispered, and finished off the letter with a triumphant flourish.

She grinned and sealed it, and called out, "Joey!" Lily looked around the common room as she tied the letter to the owl's leg.

She spotted some perfume on the table next to her, and smiled as she grabbed it and happily sprayed it all over the unfortunate lavender owl. She took out her quill and added a quick note to the outside of the scroll. Joey ruffled his wings, and took off as fast as possible before Lily could spray even more.

Just then, the common room door opened. Lily quickly tossed the perfume bottle (although now quite close to empty) back onto the table just in case the incomer was the owner of that bottle. She leapt back onto her chair and feigned sleep as best as she could, hoping to fool whoever it was that she was doing nothing.

"Nice try, Lils," said Virginia's voice. Lily could hear her set her bag onto the chair across from Lily's. "But you snore when you're asleep."

Lily instantly let out a huge fake snore.

"Hmmm, Lily must be asleep!" teased Virginia. "Nice try, Lily! Come on, you're coming with me to Hogsmeade today." She shook Lily who snapped her startlingly green eyes open. "By the way, Lily, you have ink all over your face. Scourgify!" Lily felt vigorous scrubbing on her face.

"BLEAH! AAAH!" Lily yelled, rubbing her face. "Why should I come to Hogsmeade? I'll only be dragged around with you while you obsess over clothes—"

"A talent that I'm very proud of," snapped Virginia matter-of-factly, pulling on Lily's arm, "Come on, Ask Dad's has a sale today and I absolutely can not miss it, and Maddy's going out with some bloke today, anyway, I think it's Lupin, he finally asked her out and they never would go shopping with us in a million years, please?" she begged, with her big Bambi brown eyes.

"Tough, go ask Chen or something, she's nice enough." Lily tugged her arm out of Virginia's grip.

"She's spending the day with your favorite person, her brother, James," said Virginia. She got out her brand-new Kaleesha Williams denim handbag and emptied the contents onto the table. There was about 10 bottles of perfume, a complete hair-care kit (that could be shrunken enough to fit inside even the smallest of pockets), a manicure set, 15 fashion catalogues, Witch Weekly, Sabrina: the teenage Witch (a biography since Virginia loved non-fiction) 7 extra pairs of shoes, boots, socks, some feminine necessities, a pedicure set, a massager (that could take out even the hardest of knots), 15 extra designer robes, a toothbrush, lipstick (10 tubes), lip gloss (24 tubes), eye shadow (about 17 cases), foundation (used only when truly desperate), diluted bobotuber pus (8 packs, good for those with bad acne, but Virginia was lucky she had pretty good skin that she knew how to take care of), blush (only 2 cases, sadly, since she was running out), mascara (12 tubes), and her secret weapon: her own wand when life was hopeless.

"Then take Bailey!" Lily did not feel like going anywhere today, as she had the worst cramps all night before.

"I can't take her, you know she's going out with Sirius today, and which lip gloss should I wear today? Clear? Excellent choice, self!" she complimented herself and chose about 6 tubes of clear lip gloss. "Now what flavor?" Virginia asked Lily. "Which one do you advise?"

Lily groaned. She had no choice. "It's not like you're planning on snogging the first bloke you see, is it? Just choose…strawberry, or something," she said with a wave of her hand.

"But I had strawberry last time I went shopping!" protested Virginia. "And that was 3 days ago. But then again, it wasn't clear, it was the color of strawberries and the flavor too, with some hint of spiciness, and also sparkles in it…" she pondered out loud thoughtfully.

"THEN BLOODY CHOOSE BLEEDIN' WATERMELON OR BLOODY HONEYDEW FOR ALL I BLOODY CARE!" Lily shouted. "Let's just get this bloody thing over with!"

"Blimey, what's with you?" Virginia asked, shocked. "Language, language…sounds like somebody's having the painters' in." she chose birthday cake flavored and dashed up to the dorm. Thirty minutes later she came back out with a huge pile of clothes. "Okay," she said breathlessly, dumping the clothes all over Lily, which woke her up. "I've chosen a few clothes that both you and I can wear out shopping. And I chose some knickers for you too, Lily, as you're still in your jimjams, and it's really unhealthy to not change your knickers daily, so I got you these really cute blue ones from Veronica's Whisper!"

"Veronica's Whisper!" snorted Lily. "That is the stupidest name I have ever heard for a store that sells underpants…that's so…dumb. Anyway, Virginia, seeing as it's 8:30 in the morning, it's typical for me to still be wearing my jimjams." But she took the blue panties from Virginia anyway and held them in her hand.

"Also, I chose these great outfits that you can wear, it was so hard finding the perfect outfit for you, but I narrowed it down to five—"

"That one," said Lily carelessly, pointing at the first outfit she saw. All the girls in Lily's dorm decided to share all of the clothes they had (although most of them really belonged to Virginia and Maddy), so Virginia would stop stealing all of their clothes without asking.

"Excellent choice Lily, if I do say so myself," complimented Virginia. She handed Lily the outfit which had a long red hooded Janelle Stevens sweater jacket, a quarter-length sleeve Becca Shan white shirt, dark blue Futura designer flares, a Hinkley brown belt, and chunky Charles Smithens brown boots.

"Uh…thanks?" Lily looked uncertainly at Virginia. But she took the (designer) clothes and started to get up slowly.

"Just change down here, nobody's here but you and me," Virginia said nonchalantly. She was trying to figure out which outfit to wear out shopping in Hogsmeade.

"Actually, I wasn't going to change," said Lily, "I was going back to bed, because at this rate you're choosing clothes, we'll probably leave shortly after 1 o'clock." She began to go up the stairs.

"Wait!" Virginia cried. "No! I won't take too long…this time. Just…come back and change real quick while I decide, here, you can do your hair also while you wait." She gestured to the table where the complete hair kit was.

Lily rolled her eyes. She went back to the table and armchairs and started changing out of her blue satin Paymon pajamas into the clothes that Virgina lent her.

"Wait! Don't forget underwear!" Virginia tossed the blue underpants to Lily. They landed on the table, and Lily picked them up. It was a midnight-blue thong with stars that changed color.

"Gross. Virginia, I can't wear this." Lily tossed the blue thong back to Virginia.

"What? Why not? It's a Jupiter! Just barely come out! Besides, I just bought it. No crudarola on that buttfloss." She said absent-mindedly, still concentrating on the clothes. They were all sprawled out on the carpet (the chairs and couches and cushions were stacked neatly by the fireplace, as there wasn't enough room for the both of them). There were about 20 outfits in all, complete with accessories of shoes, purses, belts, necklaces, etc. She waved her wand and some jeans and skirts flew up and arranged themselves with different shirts and such.

"It's a thong. I hate thongs. They ride up your bum." She started to take off her pants, but was hit in the face with the blue thong again.

"You just have to get used to them, is all," defended Virginia, as shirts and socks were flying in the air. "And it's not just a thong, it's a Jupiter thong. Honestly. Those things are so much more comfortable than Mars thongs."

"But people can tell you're wearing them, it's almost like not wearing a bra!" Lily shuddered.

"Oh, come on, Lily, it won't kill you, and besides, it'll show off that cute bum you have."

"Virginia!" Lily threw the underwear back at the concentrated girl.

"Lily, don't be stupid. It'll be fine, besides, who are you trying to impress? If you're trying to impress me, wear the thong." Virginia stated, pitching the underpants back to Lily.

"Nobody, I'm just not wearing them! They make me feel gross and like I have a wedgie all the time!" She flung the thong at Virginia.

"Then I'll gladly pick your wedgie out for you. So wear them. And this Justin Hammer dark red shirt has got to be washed. Or go upstairs into the dorm and face the wrath of Maddy, who is very grouchy, seeing as I accidentally woke her up, she spent most of the night awake (thanks to me and my wonderful artistic talent), and she's having really bad cramps. Or," she said, hurling the thong back to Lily, "You could wear this thong. And don't worry," the reddish-brown-haired girl assured Lily, "It's never been worn…I just bought a new pair the last time I went shopping. But maybe this Tyana skirt's just too short for Hogsmeade…"

Lily groaned. "No way. I'll wear the underwear I slept in."

Virginia tutted. "Tsk, tsk, Lily, so unhealthy…but for heaven's sake, why not? Now I could wear this one because it's fall, but…"

"Because they're the devil's panties!" She chucked the thong back at Virginia.

Virginia laughed. "No, no, no, you have it all wrong, Lily," she said, smirking. She waved her wand and several outfits when flying into a nice and neat pile of that was labeled DENIED. "Red thongs are the devil's panties. Or maybe red t-strings, to be precise. Or maybe even black and red thongs," she added thoughtfully.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Or maybe even black and red striped thongs, or with little devil horns and tails on them, too!" she added sarcastically.

"You know, that's not such a bad idea," said Virginia. "I should really design those and send them in." More clothes were flying in the air, and slightly out of control. A shoe hit Lily in the head.

"Ouch," said Lily, rubbing her forehead. "I was being sarcastic, genius. And I'm not wearing those things, and that's final."

"Oh, do I really have to?" exasperated, Virginia took back the thong. But, chuckling evilly to herself, she pointed the wand at Lily while her back was turned and muttered a spell underneath her breath. All of the sudden, the thong disappeared.

Lily stood up straight. Something felt…different. She felt slightly strange, like her back side had too much air. She shrugged and pulled off her pajama pants. Now it felt really weird. Was she even wearing underwear last night? She shrugged and bent over to pick up the jeans. Then she felt it. Oh, no. Not this.

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!" Lily swore. "Virginia Lee Wisconsin!" She screamed as she pulled on the jeans. "I'm going to get you for this, if it's the last thing I do!" She tackled the giggling girl. "That is so not funny, you little snot…you freak! Why on earth do you have to hex me to wear a thong? That is so gross, ugh…you even jinxed it so I can't even take it off…you're such a freak."

Virginia cackled wickedly, and went back to her many piles of clothes, which was now narrowed down to 5 outfits, with no more mixing and matching.

Lily sighed, and yanked on the white shirt. She pulled on the sweater jacket, and put on the belt and boots. Lily grabbed a brush from the hair kit and ran it through her hair several times. She put on some Mattie mascara and Gorgeous Green eye shadow to match her bottle green eyes, and a little lip gloss too, and then collapsed on the couch.

Two hours later, Virginia shook Lily awake. "Okay, Lily, I chose my outfit and I'm all ready to go!"

Lily sat up groggily and looked around. The chairs in the common room were back to where they were in the first place, and all of the contents of Virginia's purse were back inside her purse where they belonged. Virginia was wearing a Jackie Norris brown tank top with a Jordan Mort green jacket over it that had white stripes down the sides, Lehi blue jeans, Mityl sneakers, and had her purse (that was normal-sized on the outside but quite roomy on the inside) with her. Her brown hair was straightened and short. It was actually quite cute and had more layers.

"Virginia? Did you cut your hair?" Lily asked unbelievingly.

"Nope, I just sucked it all back into my head," Virginia said casually, pulling out a mirror and checking her brown eyes to see if it matched with the eyeshadow. She was wearing dark red eyeshadow and clear lip gloss (birthday cake flavored) and some mascara.

"No really, did you?" pressed the redhead. "Did you do it while I was asleep?"

"Yes, I fell in love with Jack while you were sleeping, Lily," Virginia said, and put back the mirror into her purse. "All ready?"

"Har, har, very funny," said Lily sarcastically, "no really, did you?"

"Well, you just looked so peaceful, I figured that I could use a hair change and I didn't want to wake you up, so I took the opportunity to change my hairstyle and hacked off some bits here and there, thank goodness I had that complete hair kit, or else I wouldn't be able to look so cute now! Don't you agree?"

"I suppose," Lily replied, "Yeah, it does look cute…kind of different looking, though, your hair used to be so long, halfway down your back! Now it's halfway down your neck."

"Yes, I know," Virginia said, touching her hair. "Ah, well. If I hate it I'll just use my hair-growing potion that I invented, tastes nasty, but works like a charm."

"Shame that it tastes bad."

"Yes, but enough chit-chat, shall we go?"

"Virginia…I really don't want to go…"

"Oh, come on. We'll go the Shop Around the Corner…they're having a book sale today. I think its 37.3860287573949572927252425252525252525252525487 percent off today."

"WHAT?" Lily yelled. She stood up and started jumping around like crazy, excited. "How come you didn't tell me sooner? Honestly, I even would've worn the thong willingly if you had told me, I'm so excited now! Let's go!"

Virginia slung her purse on her shoulder. She linked her arm with Lily's and lifted up her right leg. "To Oz?" She asked.

Lily nodded, grinning. "To Oz!" the redhead replied, and also lifted up her right leg.

Together, the girls sang out, "We're…off to see the Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Oz…" they sang, dashing out of the common room excitedly.


Up in the Gryffindor Boy's 7th year dorm, there were only two people awake. James Potter was sitting on his bed, reading, and Sirius was sitting on his, daydreaming.

"Bailey Ashley Hobbs," Sirius thought out loud, sucking on a sugar quill, "How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…" he took out his real quill and some parchment and ink. He dipped the quill in the ink and started writing on the parchment. "One, thy name is Bailey, two, you're beautiful, three, you're cute, four, you're funny, five, you're fun, six, I love you, seven, you're a good kisser…"

"Oh, Padfoot, must you do this while we're trying to sleep?" James asked, pained, but his hazel eyes were grinning. He was sitting up in bed, however, and was immersed in yet another book.

"Yes, I must Prongs, or else all my ideas will fly out of the window and will never reach my beloved Bailey!" Sirius flung his arms out dramatically, gesturing to the window.

James rolled his eyes, but laughed. "Say, when do you have that date with her, Padfoot?"

Sirius sighed sadly and checked his watch. "Not for another four hours, which is why I'm making this list to surprise her." He started jotting down more things to the list, each saying them out loud.

James flinched when Sirius said, "Thy tongue is sweeter than my sugar quill."

"That's gross, Padfoot!" he said, grossed out, "Don't ever, ever, say that again in my presence…makes me want to vomit." He started retching over the side of his bed, his tongue lolling about.

"Oh, it's not that bad, Prongs…" Sirius said unceremoniously, "hmm…your fart smells like roses…"

"GROSS!" James covered his ears with his pillow. "Gross, gross, gross, gross, gross, gross, gross! You actually smell her farts? Ewwwww!"

"What surprises me," said Remus interestedly, now sitting up and joining the conversation, "Is that she's actually passed gas in front of Padfoot…nobody has ever passed gas in front of me, I wonder why?" He thought out loud.

"Moony, my friend, I'm with you," agreed James, "nobody ever has, that is, no girls have."

"Unless you count Chen."

"Well, she doesn't count, as she's my sister."

"Yeah, and she's my best friend, too," said Remus thoughtfully.

"She's not your best friend, Moony, she's your secret lover, that's what she is," teased James. "Besides, I thought that little prissy miss old bat Evans was your best friend."

"Besides you, Wormtail and Padfoot, she is. Lily's like a sister to me. I like Lily," he remarked fondly, "but I fancy Chen, you've got that right."

James laughed. "I'm betting she fancies you just the same, but we'll have to see…maybe I'll ask her. We're spending the day together while you're out on a date with your beloved Maddy."

"She's not my beloved, but she is very good-looking," defended Remus. "She's my only chance to get me caught up with the world of Hogwarts."

"You said that last week when you were planning on asking her out. Did she shut up enough for you to ask her?"

"Natch. I'm just so incredibly handsome that my charm and good looks will shut anybody up," said Remus jokingly.

"You sound like an idiot," said James, shaking his head. He turned back to his book.

"What? Somebody say my name?" Sirius's head shot up in confusion.

"We're gossiping about you, mate," Remus told him, and grinned at James.

"Oh, all right. Just don't say anything bad about Bailey." He looked down at his parchment, which was now creeping down to the floor.

"Padfoot…you…are…strange." Spoke up another voice. It came from Peter, who could no longer sleep also. He was sitting up in his bed and grinning at the other three Marauders. They grinned back at him (well, not Sirius, as he was deep in thought about Bailey), and he asked, "So, what were you talking about? I kind of lost track when Remus started talking about how 'handsome' he is."

"Well," said James, pondering, "lets see…ah, yes. Well, the conversation would've died, anyway, so, have any weird dreams, lately, Wormtail?"

Wormtail slumped back onto his pillow, thinking hard. "Well," he said slowly, "I remember vaguely that I was at the Yule Ball from last year…and my partner was Madeline Basset…and she wouldn't shut up—"

"What else is new?" interrupted James, laughing; at the same time Remus said "Isn't she gorgeous?"

"Yes, yes," Wormtail agreed to both of them, "She is stunning and won't shut up…anyway, she all of the sudden turned into Professor McGonagall and McGonagall was yelling at me because she said that I cheated on the O.W.L.'s and I said that couldn't be possible because I'm a genius and she can't prove that—"

"What, you did cheat?" Interrupted James, at the same time Remus snorted, "Genius?"

"Okay, I said I was a genius in the dream, although I'm not really in reality, and no, I didn't cheat…really," he added miserably, "but those O.W.L.'s were so bloody hard, could I help it?"

"Yes, you could, you could study, but do go on," replied Remus, who was now rolling on the floor with James, since they were laughing for no apparent reason.

"Well, then we started dancing for some reason (if you can imagine dancing with McGonagall), and then all of the sudden I was in this circle and I was doing all these gymnastics which were awesome, but then—"

By now James and Remus were laughing so hard that they started crying and couldn't breathe.

"What?" Peter asked, bewildered. "Well, anyway, then I did a back flip and accidentally knocked off Snape's nose…"

It took about five minutes for them to calm down.

"Oh, nothing," said James, wiping a tear, "just imagining you doing gymnastics…and dancing with McGonagall…"

Him and Remus glanced at each other, and burst into fits of laughter. Wormtail laughed also, although not as hard as James and Remus.

"I'm surrounded by idiots," said a female voice behind them.

Surprised, James, Wormtail and Remus looked behind them and saw Jennifer Potter standing in the doorway, smirking at them, hands on hips. James grinned at Chen while Peter waved. Remus, however, screeched and dived into his bed, screaming, "Don't look at me! I'm naked! I'm naked!"

James and Wormtail sniggered at Remus. Apparently, he was in a very hyper mood. But Chen, being a good sport played along and screamed, covering her eyes, yelled, "Aaaah! I'm scarred for life! Scarred for life! Seeing Remus naked is never going to leave my memory! My life is ruined!"

"Nerd." James rolled his eyes at Chen. It was so strange how Chen and Remus always flirted with each other, and yet they always went out with other people. Almost as weird how Bailey and Sirius acted around each other.

"I'm not a nerd," protested Chen, "you are, James, with those ugly glasses of yours, why don't you get contacts?"

"Coz Nenny likes them, and so do other girls."

"I don't. And I have the best taste in the world, of course," she added modestly.

"Yeah, sure. I believe you."

"Of course you do. I never lie. Mail," she said, nodding towards the window. There was an emerald-colored bird bobbing up and down excitedly.

"Joey!" James exclaimed excitedly. He leapt up and opened the window and retrieved the owl. He smelled interesting, like perfume. What kind was this perfume and who did he know use it? He glanced at the scroll of parchment and noticed the note on it that said: Sorry. I don't use this perfume, I just found it on the table this morning in my Common Room, see. But I thought I'd treat you to a little nice smell, although I don't think Joey likes it that much. Ah well. It's called Love Spell, just in case you were wondering.

James laughed at the note happily. Chen rolled her eyes and sat down on the bed next to Peter.

"So Peter," she began conversationally, "how'd you sleep? Any weird dreams last night?" Chen didn't know what they were talking about earlier, so Remus and James exploded with laughter again.

After all the snickering subsided, James turned back to his letter. He unraveled it as it rolled across the floor right next to Sirius's bit of parchment.

"Dear Stag," he read aloud, "Right now its 6 o'clock and I couldn't sleep. The girls in my dorm all snore really badly—"

"Prongs, you hypocrite," said Sirius, finally finishing up his list, "how would you like me to reread my list of why I love Bailey so much?"

"Stag?" Chen turned sharply at the name. "That sounds familiar…"

"Remember, I'm a stag when I transform? Duh, genius…" said James, rolling his eyes. He continued to read in silence while Chen tried to recall where she heard this…this name.

"What list? Let me see," demanded Peter, and he snatched the parchment from Sirius's grasp. As he read it, the expression on his face became more contorted with disgust and amusement. Remus, already being quite hyper, started chuckling at Wormtail's face.

"I love you because you're my night and day?" he read out-loud incredulously. "Your smile is my umbrella…your stormy grey eyes guide me through my storms in life…Sirius…you're high. You're high on something."

"Yup, I am," replied Sirius, grinning, "I'm high on love."

"Sirius, you're insane," said James, shaking his head, but laughing all the same.

Remus couldn't have a comment, as he was laughing too hard to reply.

"Well, I think it's sweet," Chen scolded all of them. She looked at Sirius sharply. "Bailey will love it, Sirius, and will tackle you and smother you with kisses," she said, smiling.

"Thanks," said Sirius, checking his watch. "Only 3 ½ more hours till I see her!" He yelled excitedly.

James groaned. "It's only been a half hour? 3 ½ more hours of this hell?"

"Well, if you want, we could go to Hogsmeade early," suggested Chen. She didn't exactly want to listen to Sirius herself, as much as she loved Sirius like another brother.

"Now that's an idea!" said James excitedly. "Why don't we? I'll quickly get ready and we'll be on our way!"

He leaped up, grabbed some clothes out of this dresser and dashed into the bathroom, tripping over Sirius in the process.


"Shop, shop, shop, till you drop, drop, drop!" sang out Virginia. This was clearly her type of sport. Who needed to do pushups to get exercise when you could go shopping instead? "Don't you agree, Lily?"

"Yes," Lily said wearily, and fell over with a thump onto the cushioned chair.

Virginia flipped her short ginger hair back and looked at Lily, sighing. "Honestly, Lily, it's not that bad…after all, we've only been gone for, say," she checked her watch, "one hour? Not that much at all. And when we left you were all excited to go!"

"That's because I was excited to go to the Shop Around the Corner, not go to all these stores and do nothing but look at clothes that you obviously don't need!" She replied wearily.

"Oh, come on! It's fun!" Virginia picked up a hot-pink shirt. "What do you think?" She asked Lily, holding up the shirt to herself.

"Try it on!" Lily said. "And then let's get out of here! There's a bunch of madwoman glaring at you because you're taking forever to choose! I think they're going to attack," she added nervously.

Virginia glanced at them, unruffled. "They're just jealous that I'm better looking than them," she said calmly, and took off a few more shirts from the rack. "and the fact that I can wear any color and type of clothing no matter what." She snatched about ten more shirts that were all different varieties of pink and flounced off into a dressing room.

Lily groaned. How much longer was this going to be?

"Looks like somebody's as bored and exhausted as I am," spoke up a voice. Lily turned her head. Sitting next to her was a boy with dark skin, dreadlocks, and fathomless black eyes. They were cool to look at. He was a Ravenclaw, but that's all that Lily knew about him.

She nodded and groaned. "Bloody yes," she said, gritting her teeth in annoyance. He laughed.

"I'm here with my sister," he said, jerking his thumb towards a black girl that was probably a year younger than he was. "She makes me go shopping with her all the time…this is about the 15th time this year."

Lily nodded sympathetically. "I'm here with my friend, who is insane and driving me mad."

The boy smirked, showing white, even teeth. "The name's Justin. Justin Giddins." He stuck out his hand. "What's your name?"

"Evans," said Lily, smiling, and grabbed his hand. "Lily Evans," she said, shaking the big hand.

"Evans," he repeated, recalling his memory. "say, you're the Head Girl!"

"Right you are," she said, grinning. "Glad you recognized me!"

"Well, I, being the person I am that don't notice anything; I'm actually amazed that I recognized you. But aren't you that person that hates James Potter?"

Lily scowled. "Don't bring him up again," she warned, brandishing her wand like a sword, "unless you value those dreadlocks."

"Not the locks!" he gasped, grabbing hold of them.

"How come you never notice anything if you apparently go shopping with her all the time?"

"Dunno," Justin said, shrugging. "Probably the fact that I get distracted easily by other things. Like Quidditch," he remarked dreamily.

"You talk about Quidditch like my best friend talks about girls," laughed the redhead.

"What? Gross! I'm disturbed," he backed away from Lily uneasily.

"Don't be ridiculous, he's a boy, not a girl, honestly!" Lily shook her head, laughing.

"Oh," said Justin, much more relieved now. "So, who's your friend? Is she as good looking as you so she must get more clothes?"

"She's quite better looking, actually," said Lily, glancing back at the dressing room. "She's probably going to buy the whole store, since it's based on pink. She's in a 'pink' mood right now, and does whatever possible to get what she wants. That's Virginia for you."

"Virginia? What's her last name?"

"What? Somebody says my name?" asked Virginia, stepping out of the dressing room. "I actually decided not to get any pink at all today, since its fall. So I think I'm going to choose colors that are in more soft earth tones, what do you think, Lily?"

Lily shrugged. Justin, on the other hand, couldn't take his eyes off of Virginia. He let out a slow whistle while Virginia went to a store clerk and dumped all of the clothes on top of the clerk.

"That girl is very, very good looking," he said in awe.

Lily snorted. "Wait till you see her best friend, Maddy. A lot of blokes think that she's a goddess."

"A goddess above a goddess? Wow," he uttered.

"Yeah, lots of people really fancy Virginia Wisconsin…"

"She's named after two states in America?"

"Don't you know your geography well!" Lily commented. "Well, her her last name is Wisconsin, and she has interesting American parents, so, they named her Virginia."

"Wow…America the beautiful…"

Lily snickered. "You're pretty entertaining to talk to, Justin."

"Why, thank you."

Virginia came back to Lily and started tugging on her arm. "Lily, let's go now, I'm ready for the next store!"

"Hey, what's your name?" Justin quickly asked Virginia. She turned and smiled sweetly at him.

"Virginia. I'm a 7th year Gryffindor and I love going out to eat, particularly, Italian Food. I'm free next weekend if I'm not shopping. My favorite color is pink, and—"

"LET'S GO!" Lily roared, and dragged her out of the store, which was called So Pink. "Sorry, Justin, you'll have to ask her out later!" she called back, while Virginia sadly waved to Justin.

"Aw, Lily, you shoved me out of a date!" whined Virginia.

"If we're going to go shopping, we're going to do it quick," said Lily, grinding her teeth. "I know Justin was quite cute, but, promise me, you'll be going out with him next weekend. I'll make sure of that. Now can we go to The Shop Around the Corner?"

"No, of course not! We have to buy my earth-toned clothes!"

Lily screamed.


At this time Sirius and Bailey were walking around on Hogwarts grounds. Sirius took her to a place on the other side of the lake, underneath a tree.

"Bailey," he began, taking out a big scroll of parchment, "this is for you."

"Oh, Sirius, for me?" Bailey exclaimed. She batted her eyelashes at him, while he smiled seductively back at her.

"Yes, for you," he said, handing her the scroll.

Bailey eagerly unraveled the big long roll of parchment.

"Bailey Ashley Hobbs," she read aloud, "How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…" As Bailey read on, her stormy grey eyes got wider and wider. So did her smile. She looked like a pumpkin.

Sirius sighed with relief. At least she liked it.

As Bailey finished reading the list, she squealed with joy and tackled Sirius. "I love it!" she shouted with glee, and smothered him with kisses.

Just as Chen predicted, thought Sirius triumphantly. They rolled over, snogging heavily, and fell into the lake.


James quickly prodded the fuse of the firecracker with his wand, and it started hissing and crackling. Snickering, he backed out from underneath the table of Slytherins and raced back to Chen, who was outside of the Three Broomsticks.

James whipped off the Invisibility Cloak and grinned at Chen. She grinned back and raced to the window just outside the table that ten Slytherins were sitting at. They peeked inside, just in time to see the bangers go off.

The Slytherins, which consisted of a few obnoxious ones that James, Chen, and Sirius particularly disliked, all screamed. One girl jumped up on the table and was trying to fight off one, which apparently had caught onto her pants. She started swinging it around and it flew off and hit another boy in the nose. He squealed loudly (like a pig) and ran around the pub, yelling "Gerroff me! Gerroff me!" Severus Snape was also at the table and was too scared to move. He sat rigid in his chair and hoped nothing would touch him. Unfortunately…

James and Chen guffawed loudly and high-fived each other, enjoying the scene that was laid before them. One banger hit a blonde Slytherin in the back and he did a double back flip, screaming. He jumped down on the floor, wincing. Then, another firecracker exploded in three boys' faces, and they all fell down on top of the blonde boy. He bellowed out an interesting assortment of swearwords.

"Well, pardon my French!" commented Chen on the language. "Sorry, couldn't understand that, what were you saying?"

"Honestly," said James, shaking his head. "they have more crap coming out of their mouths than what goes into toilets."

"We should blow up a toilet after this, just in case we get bored."

"Now that's an idea," remarked James, agreeing. "We'll have to. Maybe Moaning Myrtle's…see what happens."

"Yeah!" said Chen enthusiastically. "Or, we could blow up Madam Puddifoot's bathroom, or something in there, get those disgusting couples to stop snogging and try to have some conversation for once…"

"Now you're talking!" James said eagerly, "or, we could get something to glue their lips together or something, they'd never snog each other again, use a Permanent Sticking Charm, that'd be cool…"

"Oooo, yes! Lily once invented this lip gloss that had a Permanent Sticking Charm on it, of course she had the antidote, and she gave it to her sister for Christmas!" she laughed at the memory. "It was hilarious, she told me all about how her sister was so excited, and then she wore it on a date with some ugly boyfriend of hers, and then when they kissed goodnight, they couldn't get apart for the longest time!"

James snorted and rolled his eyes. Even though he couldn't stand Evans, you had to admit that it was a good idea. "We should do it…but where do we get the lip gloss?"

"I'll ask Lily later when I see her. But come on, let's go to The Shop Around the Corner, they're having a sale!"

"They are?" James asked excitedly. "Let's go!"

They ran off, leaving a bunch of screaming Slytherins back in the pub.


Lily groaned under the weight of all the shopping bags that Virginia gave her the burden to bear. "I can't believe you, Virginia," she groaned, stumbling over a pebble, "that you treat me like a slave enough to carry all of your bags!"

Virginia tutted. "Oh, honestly, you're not carrying all of my bags, and besides, it's a good workout to win arm-wrestling with! Besides, I'm carrying some too!"

That's a bit of an understatement, thought Lily. "Yeah, seeing as those two petite bags that are probably as big as an engagement ring box are so heavy, I understand why you're giving me the 'easy' load." She said, staring at the tiny bags that had valuable diamond necklaces in them that Virginia was carrying. "Can we go to The Shop Around the Corner yet?"

Virginia was astonished. "What? No way! We've only been to…" she counted on her fingers and ran out. "Okay, so we've been to every clothing and cosmetics store in Hogsmeade, so what?"

"SO LET'S GO TO THE STORE THAT I WANT TO GO TO NOW!" Lily yelled, surprising Virginia. "Honestly. Before I drop these bags that you're forcing me to carry, which, at the moment, are slipping right through my fingers and I might accidentally slip on that banana peel and land in that puddle and ruin all your nice new clothes that you bought."

"You're right," Virginia stated thoughtfully, "I'll have to do something about it." She took out her wand, and Lily smiled, relieved. However, her smile faded when Virginia said, "Impervius! There, now if you fall, the bags won't get ruined!"

Lily sighed. "You just don't get it, do you?"

"Hmmm?" asked Virginia, studying her map of Hogsmeade.

Lily just rolled her eyes and muttered, "Wingardium leviosa" and started levitating the bunches of bags that she was carrying. "Say, Virginia, can we go to The Shop Around the Corner, please?"

"Why, certainly, oh patient one," Virginia said sarcastically, "shall we go?"

"YES!" cried Lily, exasperated.

Virginia shrugged. "If you say so," she said, and they stalked off to the store, which was just around the corner.

Unfortunately for Lily, her worst enemy was there also.

"YOU!" shrieked Lily, just as the same time James Potter shouted, "YOU!"

Chen and Virginia greeted each other quite informally, hugging each other and smiling and chatting happily, while in the meantime, Lily and James had whipped out their wands and were circling each other like animals getting ready for a huge bloody battle.

"Oh, please," said Virginia, rolling her eyes. "You two are such idiots."

"Don't start a fight in Hogsmeade!" Chen implored, annoyed.

Lily and James paid them no mind, and were about to fire off hexes at each other's throats, when just in the nick of time, Virginia pulled out her own wand and yelled, "Expelliarmus!" James and Lily's wands came flying out of their hands.

"Virginia," Lily and James whined.

Virginia shook her head, and stuffed the wands in her roomy purse. "No way," she said, patting the purse to make sure they were snug, "Honestly. Stop fighting. You two are like a bunch of two-year olds. How immature."

Lily and James glared at each other, guilty. If it was possible to guiltily glare at someone, Lily Evans and James Potter made it possible. Still glaring, they went their separate ways throughout the book store.

"Look at those two," Chen muttered, "Why can't they get along? It's so stupid, how they hate each other."

"Do you even know why they hate each other?" asked Virginia.

"Well, in 4th year he teased her too much, so she was really rude to him, and then in 5th year he crossed the line of bullying Snape, so she 'officially' hated him, and so he just gave up and hated her. I think."

"That has got to be the stupidest reason I have ever heard for anyone hating each other. I can't believe the Headmaster made them Head Boy and Girl. They're probably going to kill each other the next meeting they have to have."

"They better not," Chen said grimly, "they have to plan the upcoming ball."

Virginia snorted with laughter. "Can't wait to see how that turns out," she said, giggling.

Chen smirked and imagined the Great Hall partially decorated with crappy decorations, frightened House-Elves, people dancing to Nearly Headless Nick's orchestra, and Lily and James wrestling on the refreshment table.

She shared this with Virginia and the two girls started guffawing so loudly and hard that they couldn't stop.

"Hmmm…what books should I get?" Lily murmured to herself, browsing the MUGGLE BOOKS section, "I could get Les Miserables, but I already read that ten times, or I could get The Count of Monte Cristo, or perhaps A Little Princess…Oh, what the heck. I'll get all three." She swiped them off of the shelves and continued looking. "Should I get this book? Oh, wow…" she took it off of the shelf and looked at it. On the cover there was a drawing of a stick-figure girl, with a star above it. She turned it to the side and read out loud, "Stargirl. Hmmm." She opened the book and started to read. As she got to the 5th page, she laughed and shut the book. "I'll get it." She added it to her pile of books (which held about thirty-five by now) and left the section.

James Potter was looking at some books in the SPECIAL SECTION. He snatched about five or six, and added it to his pile (most likely as big as Lily's) and strolled over to the cashier. He smiled at her as her eyes widened at the sight of his number of books. "Planning to eat or sleep at all this century, James?" she asked, taking the books and ringing them up.

"Wow, Potter, I never knew that you could read, that's an amazing feat for you, isn't it?" drawled Lily from behind James.

James whirled around. "I bet I read more than you do," he challenged.

"Wow!" exclaimed the girl behind the counter, excited. "I have two star readers in the same bookstore! You must be friends!"

James and Lily snorted. "Yeah right," said James, rolling his eyes. "I wouldn't be friends with him if my life counted on it," said Lily.

Virginia leaned over to the girl and whispered loudly, "They're engaged, and they only fight for the attention, in case you can't tell."

This statement sounded so absurd to Lily and James that they smirked at each other, and said no more as they paid for their books.

As Lily and Chen left the store (James and Virginia decided to walk and talk together), Chen asked, "Would it really kill you to get along with James, Lily?" she asked timidly.

Lily glared at her. "Yes, if you knew how much I hated that…that…"

"That thing," concluded James, "then you would know how I feel."

"No, not really," said Virginia, shaking her head. "I hated this one Ravenclaw I dated, but you don't see me hexing him whenever I can. Besides, I thought that you two had a moment back there in the shop when you smiled at each other."

"Even if that was true," said James,

"Which it isn't, it lasted for a brief two seconds," said Lily. Chen rolled her eyes and checked her watch. "Say, don't you have a date with Derrick soon?" she asked Lily.

Lily checked her own watch and gasped. "Oh my gosh!" she exclaimed, and shoved all of her bags into Chen's arms. "Could you carry those the rest of the way back? I've got to go!" she shouted, and took off running, at the same time that James did.

The only way that Lily and James were on time for their dates was the fact that they raced each other (each trying to trip the other) back and barely made it on time, although quite out of breath.


A/N: All done. I'm stupid. I just realized that they didn't have thongs in the 70's. My friend just repeated the history of the thong to me. Heh. Whoops.

Okay, so I haven't exactly had Lily and James (more of Stag and Irish) "meet" each other yet. I don't really have time. But I thank you so much again and again and again for reading this story!

smell you later!

Jade