Damaged

Chapter Eleven: Move On?

Bulma stood still for what seemed like an eternity. A feeling of déjà vu tried to creep unto her senses, but she felt so numb not a thought managed to intrude her head for minutes long. She just stared, open-mouthed, wide-eyed at the direction of the castle, or at least its former place. She was holding her breath for the longest of times as any process in her body had completely ceased. She was unable to tear her eyes away from the scenery. She couldn't force herself to think straight as that would mean she'd have to start thinking about everything again, she'd have to react again and that... That was definitely something she wasn't ready for. Not yet, not ever.

She wasn't really ready to lose Vegeta from her life either, but fate was quite a twisted inconsiderate bitch and over all did not care about the mistress' feelings about the whole situation.

Staring into nothing in particular, the woman, who had by the time been successful in supporting her body weight still in an upwards position even though her knees were buckling beneath her, finally gave the effort up and collapsed again the ground, staring blankly forwards. Her bottom lip was trembling and her throat felt sore from the war cry she had let escape her mouth earlier. Her breathing was slowly becoming labored as her eyes were slowly filling with salty liquid.

His Palace… Gone… His form… Nowhere to be seen… His soul… It had fled her grasp… His body… Crushed underneath the heavy material of his solitude… A numbing feeling was creeping unto her senses – he was gone… Forever… She wasn't going to see him again, never hear his deep masculine voice again, and never take in the grace of his majestic features, never again able to let her frisky cerulean eyes roam over his built form… Never again she was to feel the warmth of another as she refused to have any other man touch her heart again as the arrogant Saiya-jin had managed to.

Never before had she felt so naked to the world… Yes, she lost her home, her people… But it was something that happened to Vegeta before, so when she made her way to make him regret the day he set his people at hers she'd know her words would make him feel bitter regret. You couldn't possibly imagine how much it stung her when he had informed her it wasn't his fault… The look in his eyes made her feel as if she had committed the biggest sin known to man and Saiya-jin both as she had come on his planet to demand explanation. She saw the hurt in his eyes, so deep…

His beautiful onyx orbs that she could stare at for hours on end and never grow tired of it for a millisecond… How was she going to live without them taking in her features every once in a while the day? How was she to live without the protection Vegeta provided by simply existing? When was it that she had become so dependant on the handsome King? Why did he mean so much to her? What was it that he had done in her behalf to ever make her feel such… gratitude in her subconsciousness? She had tried to convince herself that he had been nothing but pain to her, nothing but grief was what he had wreaked upon her fragile life from its very beginning.

But as hard as she tried, the harder it was for her mind to accept her words of common fallacy as she had to admit all the things he had done for her. When she had been little and forced to live on Frieza's ship, who had protected her all day long? Who had been her first friend ever? Who insured her safe returning home? Who had been there for her whenever she needed a strong hand and a powerful embrace to soothe her grief? Who was the one who showed her how wonderfully love felt like? Who was the one she had been willing to give her life for? Who had been the one that had given her a roof to sleep under after the destruction of her planet? She lived by chance, but it was anything but chance that Vegeta let her reside his lands, not to mention his personal quarters. Even after five years in which she could swear he had grown more brutal, monstrous and quite a grotesque figure in the eyes of every living being in the Galaxy, had he ever been harsher to her physically in her stay on Vegeta-sei?

All these thoughts littered her mind mercilessly, making her hands tremble as they were now supporting her form against the ground. How was it possible for him to die? Were his rants of being the strongest being, which resided this Universe, empty monologues? Could it be that he was no longer as strong as he had been once? No, that was not possible. Once breaking a level, a Saiya-jin was to further improve his strength, velocity and power, not weakening. Then it was true – there was now someone stronger than him… Someone that had taken his dear life… And permanently shattered the remains of her soul to tiny pieces which were blown away from the strong wind of this planet into oblivion.

What was she going to now? All alone in this Universe? If they have managed to eliminate Vegeta, she was sure her fragile life was going to be taken soon as well. Among as the whole planet's destruction to follow closely. How was she going to survive in those last few days she had left without the one she loved most?

How could she even deny it anymore to herself? God, she loved him… More than life… More than death… How she wished she could've told him that before he let her go instead of shrieking and demanding… No… It was too cruel… He couldn't be dead, could he? His pride couldn't be more important that his fucking life!

Letting a sob escape her lips, Bulma let her head fall down against her collarbone, facing the soil beneath her shaky arms. Now what? Without a direction to go in life, how was she to pull through and find some sanity in that head of hers? He had been so dominant and manipulative of her that she felt utterly lost and broken when he was gone. No… That wasn't right… He had been gone for quite some time now… But she had never before felt this hollow inside. No… It was not Vegeta's manipulative nature that caused her current breakdown. It was a power bigger than him, bigger than her, bigger than anyone… She still loved the oaf… And what for? Only to be hurt again, by his harsh words, by his savage treatment and by his sudden death…

As the tears cascaded freely down her cheeks, Bulma finally felt the cold rain drops crash against her skull and soak her clothes and hair. But she didn't even pay attention to that. She was searching… She was searching inside her chest, her whole body, for a place there had been left just a trace from any form of happiness. She found none. Even her beautiful memories, ones she had before treasured dearly, all of them consisted with Vegeta… All of them possessed remembrance of his features… And the thought of him only twisted the knife that had been stabbed into her heart further.

"Bulma…" ChiChi's soft whisper did not even reach her deaf ears. The raven haired girl extended her arm as to go to her Queen, but Goku beat her to it as he threw his girlfriend a worried look when he stepped closer to the elder woman.

"My lady…" He kneeled beside her, looking at the side of her face slightly concealed behind her lavender tresses. She didn't react to him either. She was too engulfed in her own little Hell to register anything around her…

Death… No, impossible… He had to live; he had to be there… Alone… No, she couldn't be! She'd been alone for the longest of time; he couldn't just leave her now again! Abandoned… No, couldn't be! He couldn't be so cruel to her! He had to be there, the selfish bastard! He cared for you till his last breath… If he cared, why was he dead now?

He cared for you since the day you met… No, that's a lie! He never cared for her! That was so false! He had never known the warmth of another, never knew emotion or love as he grew without parents in an environment so cruel and merciless any show of affection would be death of his young corpse… The fact he grew by himself did not make him not guilty for his harshness and… He had protected you, shown you the deepest and most fragile part of himself for you to freely see and touch… Then why did he pull so fast away from her? She didn't understand! He was afraid of you, afraid of your power over him, afraid of the impact you had on his bottled up emotions, afraid of the chaos you stirred in his heart with your nature… Vegeta, afraid? Please! Spare your words! He had stretched his hand of protection over you and your allies even after he departed for his new home… He had never forgotten you as he welcomed you in his own chambers out of possessiveness for your welfare… Not for a second had the thought of you left his raging mind… You're lying, she screamed mentally.

He cared until his last exhale… He adored you deeply, as his post priced possession… He treated you as if you were something that always needed him, as if his presence and protection were things that couldn't be questioned… He always did as if he had vowed to preserve your life… But he still never loved her really… He had never shown love and devotion to her, even if there had been lust between them, even if he did grow to tolerate her presence in his life at a point and began caring as well.

Saiya-jins are creatures with complicated nature… They have possession of a greater power, their anger. Breaking the level of Super Saiya-jin had been said in their legends to be equivalent of a divine power, one that can be reached only by the greatest of men among them to ever live… He had become a deity for his people, the people that would've rejected his ways if he went home with an earthling woman in hand. A nation that now feared, adored and respected him for his power as they would've despised him for the reason he managed to finally achieve his goal only had they known. He achieved his goal because he had been stubborn enough, she lied to herself in hope it would slip.

He hated Frieza for everything he had done to his people, to his life, to his psyche. But it had not been his selfish reasoning that had triggered him to transform. No, that's not— He cracked when he was about to see you getting hurt, in front of his very eyes no less… And he knew at that time he was powerless to stop the tyrant from doing as he wished, as Vegeta was weaker… And his anger, his bitterness triggered him into transforming. His mind screamed "protect" louder than ever before, louder than any other thing that could've crossed his mind at the moment. He wanted to stop his bastardly master from hurting you more than anything else he ever wanted before. More than he ever wanted to change, to be more powerful, he wished to be able to do something that moment. Not because of his people, not because of his father, not because of his father, not because of himself… But for you. For you and you only. How else would you explain, being the emotion-wise Earth Queen that you were, this sudden selfless behaviour of his if not driven forward because of feelings like devotion and love?

How could anyone even think Vegeta had ever loved her? No, that was impossible! You're in denial… You know he loved you… Only he didn't know that… Not before you bedded together. Realization pained him, and scared him awfully. He had grown weak in his own eyes. But he couldn't just leave you and couldn't take you with him as strongly as he hard wished he could. He sent you to safety before anything else…

Her form was now trembling terribly as the sobs wreaked her body without remorse. She had wondered about it in the past, but couldn't let the reverie last for too long as the option only pained her further… That he had given up on both their feelings out of belief that they couldn't last together in this, or any other, world… That one day he might not be able to protect her if she was by him, as he would surely feel bound to preserve her if she was to become his mate. If anything, she believed Vegeta was a man of his word and a man of honour. Protecting someone that depended on him was one of the things his codes of honour would surely demand.

Secretly, she had always known he thought of himself foul and evil, as if he wasn't the proper companion for a creature as innocent as her… No, she was a far cry from innocence… But also not as …cruel and cold-hearted as he had been. By no means did that fact mean to her that he was unworthy of being with her, that he wouldn't be able to do things right… Yes, they often fought; yes, they constantly insulted each other; yes, they did hurt each other frequently… But it was the deeper feelings that mattered to her! How couldn't he understand that? How couldn't he understand that it had been him that she wanted all this time? Not the Saiya-jin Prince, not the Saiya-jin King… Just the Vegeta she knew…and had grown to love…

Her crystalline tears collided with the soil instantly getting soaked into it had already grown drenched from the falling rain. How could she have been so blind? How could she have been so stupid? How could she have been so selfish? How could she not have noticed the littlest things about him that gave out most of his actions, most of his thoughts,… most of the complicated nature that she always claimed she would never understand… Why did he have to die in order of her to finally understand?

The thought was the last straw for her. Exhausted mentally from her battle with herself, the woman fell into a state of shock as her body began convulsing with the pained choked sobs that left her throat in a husky way, hurting her vocal cords as they did so. The neurotic earthling did not even notice as she was pulled into the gentle embrace of her life-long friend, Goku.

The boy looked sympathetically down at her in his arms. He could bring himself to understand what she was going through… Vegeta had really been a figure in her life that she had treasured dearly for many reasons, a very important figure to her. He didn't know who had done – he turned his head to face the ruins of the Palace – this, but he vowed, for the sake of his broken Queen, who had her shoulders bounce up and down uncontrollably as her sobs made her whole body tremble with grief, that he would avenge his King.

The people who were around had centered their attention at the crying creature in Kakarott's arms. All of them have known the Earth Queen as a temperamental woman that never let herself fall on her back, never let anyone speak back to her, no matter the rank or power; they knew her as a strong woman, unshakable by any means. And there she was, crying inconsolably for a man she had made everyone believe she hated to her core. A pitiful display, truly, how such a temperamental woman would turn into a weeping fragile little child…

As the thunders snaked in the sky like serpents, the group of both Saiya-jins and Earthlings made their way inside the huge forest that would be their solace for the night. Hopefully, the next day was going to be better than the previous…

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

The obsidian haired teenage looking boy threw the book from his grasp with an aggravated growl. He had been reading for the last half an hour or so through the annoying object, but all he could find was useless worthless senseless mushy bullshit of this woman!

"Stupid earthlings and their pathetic petty emotions!" He screamed as he created an energy ball in his hand, destroying a nearby column that still stood after the collapsing of the Saiya-jin Palace. His twin sister frowned at his outburst and went to pick the book up from the dirt. She dusted it off and opened it. The cerulean eyes of her brother glared at her reading form. "You're wasting you time!" He informed her exasperated. "There is nothing to help us in that pile of pointless crap!"

His – kind of – well-meant words were, however, ignored by the woman, who did not turn her attention away from the book in her hands. After a few minutes of utter silence, the boy couldn't take it anymore. He wanted to kill, destroy and purge! And he would start from the weakling human woman that had poisoned his mind with her no-good scribbles! He voiced his thoughts to his sibling and was about to storm off, looking for his prey when her hand shot up towards him, motioning for him to stop.

"I don't have an idea how you have read, but I don't think you really understood anything, dear brother of mine." The way she addressed him dripped with open sarcasm that only further angered the young man. "We know that she had a deeper connection with mister goldilocks. Also, she is very naïve and trusts strangers even at times like these, when enemies hide in every dark corner of your very own room. Not to forget that she has brains that could be really useful to us when we rule the Universe after you have destroyed the old man."

He snorted.

"So what do you suggest, almighty and smart one?" He scolded. A smug expression covered the blonde's face and stretched the corners of her mouth into a malicious smile.

"We can use this woman quite well in more than one way, if you know what I mean…" She gave him a wicked smile that he soon returned.

"I like the plan. So what do we do now, huh?"

"You go and seek, I'm going to find her and the rest of the curs that managed to escape this place and get her to trust me. We'll see how things develop and then we'll see how we'll carry on further with the plan."

"Fine." They went off in different directions. Before the girl had the chance to go too far, her relative called out.

"Juuhachigou!" She whipped her head as she heard her name being yelled. The glare her brother sent her made her azure emotionless eyes roll. Gosh, he could be such a kid sometimes!

"Don't fucking worry, I won't!"

Pleased with the answer he got, the boy flew off in an unknown direction, leaving his sister all to her thoughts and the evil schemes that were incredibly fast forming in her mind.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

It seemed like an eternity has passed since they last could see the ruins of the collapsed Saiya-jin castle. No one had spoken a word if you didn't count Bulma's moaning of her lost one's name over and over again like a mantra the past few minutes. She had calmed down, or at least her cries and sobs had ceased. Goku refused to let her go on her own and so she was still seated in his gentle warm embrace.

Even if she had calmed outwardly, her eyes spoke clearly that she still hurt as hell inside. There was no, absolutely no trace of life in them. No passion to keep on living, no will to survive. She simply did not care anymore. She didn't care if she lived, she didn't care what became of her. She lost her people, she lost her family, she lost most of her friends,… and now she lost her Vegeta and her heart went with him, dragging her soul into the vast abyss as well. If before she thought she had been an empty shell, her previous condition was a very far cry from what she was now. She wouldn't answer if asked, she wouldn't look at anyone, and she wouldn't concentrate on anything. She was just staring off space, looking in nothing in particular in the far distance.

Her companions were really worried about her mental condition. They were even considering the possibility, not verbally of course, that she could've gone completely insane with her nervous breakdown earlier. Yet they didn't dare speak of the touchy subject, scared that they might cause another breakdown.

Maybe time really healed wounds… Maybe time would heal Bulma's scars too… ChiChi could only hope so, for the Earth Queen had been a very energetic and wonderful, cheerful, person once… But the girl knew that when she dreamt of her Queen being the same she had been when she resided her home Palace on Earth with the Saiya-jin Prince was a reverie too brave and unreal to be true… Those days were over a long time ago and would never come back…

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

As everyone in the little group was becoming quite tired of walking ever deeper into the woods, a rather huge house caught their attention. Their heads shot up in its direction and they shared a meek glance before they all ran towards the direction of their salvation… or what they thought would be their salvation. Not for a second did they consider that not all Saiya-jins were as friendly and welcoming as their King had been… Though Vegeta was not really that much of a host to all of them…

As they stood in front of the remarkable doors of the Manor, Bulma's soft-spoken voice reached her carrier's ears faintly.

"Let me go."

"But, Bulma—" He tried to object, but it was pointless.

"I can stand myself." She insisted, not once letting her eyes grace his in a gaze lock. He sighed deeply but still complied with her wish, letting her feet support her weight against the grass. She stood there like a doll, with no sign of life in her eyes whatsoever…

As she made no move to knock on the door, ChiChi decided to be the one to break the ice and brought her balled fist to the huge wooden door, knocking loudly upon it. As nothing happened or could be heard for several seconds, she made a move to knock again, but her wrist stopped mid-air as the door flew open and there stood a tall Saiya-jin with rather rough features. He sized the girl up and down and noticed the tall strange-haired Saiya-jin behind her as well. His suspicious expression did not falter for once as he inquired,

"Who are you and what do you want?" His voice was as rough and rotten as his character, ChiChi mused. Her eye brows knitted and she was about to show that guy how to speak to her and her friends again when Goku interjected before it was too late.

"We are just poor travelers in despair, kind sir. We need some refuge for the night. We are willing to pay as much as you want, money is no obstacle."

The polite court words of the young warrior did nothing to make the other guy want to hear a word more. He despised the idea of some filthy strangers coming in his house and using his things even though he had enough rooms to place a whole army inside. But still… He didn't need money; money wasn't a problem for him either. He had plenty of it and did not like the idea of putting up with some strangers for God knows how long just because of getting wealthier. He was about to shove them away and get back to his previous activities when something caught his eye.

Something? No, more like someone.

A malicious grin covered his sly features. Maybe he could reconsider…

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

Somewhere, sometime, in the middle of nothing, a small river flowed with a water stream bigger than before because of the torrential rain. The liquid hit mercilessly against its channel, digging the watersides deeper.

The ground was already soaked with the water pouring from the sky, but the flood rain still wouldn't cease. The plants' leaves were already heavy with the droplets that fell, the branches and trunks of the trees were soaked to the core.

Somewhere, sometime, in the middle of nothing, in this rainy scenery, a small man breathed with difficulty, his wounds deep and still having blood ooze out of them. He chuckled. The pain… A feeling he recognized all too well… A feeling that made him believe he was very much alive, even if he had doubted it at first.

And he promised himself that he'd surely make those bastards regret the day they left him living.

The man was getting too caught up in diabolical thoughts when his muscles clenched tightly in a painful convulse, reminding him of his current condition and utter impossibility of fulfilling his vows. He would make them regret the day they were created, but first he needed to tend his wounds…

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

Bulma was staring blankly into nothingness. She seemed completely oblivious to the hungry stare of the bulky warrior that would soon turn to be their host.

However, ChiChi, Goku and Ariane were not as ignorant of the look he was giving the young woman. ChiChi stood in front of him, blocking his sight of her, wearing a deep scowl plastered on her face.

This woman had been like nothing he had ever laid eyes upon, he mused subtly. She was exotic in her colouring as much as she was exotic in her behaviour too, he guessed. Her lavender tresses and cerulean eyes made a mix with her porcelain skin that resembled the radiance of an angel… Her innocence was something that caught his eye too. Such a fragile and breakable creature in a world so cold and motionless as Vegeta-sei… His observant roaming eyes missed the grief written clearly across her features.

Snapping out of his trance as soon as the little wench blocked his view, the guy looked straight and made Goku's eye brows narrow.

"Your money isn't something I want." He informed them.

"Is that your final?" The Saiya-jin scientists wondered why the boy was so hasty to give hope up.

"But maybe there is another way for you to pay for your stay in my mansion…" The gruff voice trailed off.

"I'm afraid that will not—"

But Bulma beat him to it; her following words making everyone present reconsider the thought of her insanity.

"What do you want of me?"

The grin spread across the gross imbecile's face like slime over glass. That was all he had been waiting for…

"The nights can seem endless without a woman to warm the covers under which I sleep." Without speaking frankly, his hint was obvious enough for one to understand the meaning of his words. ChiChi opened her mouth to object, but she had no time to as her Queen continued on.

"And if I 'warm up your covers' you aren't going to say a thing to my people about anything they do in your house?"

"As long as they don't break or steal anything, I won't."

"How am I to trust your word?"

"Do you have a choice?" His voice was as sly as his expression was, making the women (all but Bulma; she simply seemed like she didn't care with her stoic expression on her features) feel engrossed with this man completely.

It didn't take her long before her answer finally left her words, making the pig's grin widen ever more.

"Very well then. You shall do with me whatever you want, as long as you don't lay a finger on my people." Her retort made everyone's heads whipped in her direction. Some were looking with fear her way, knowing that she had finally cracked completely; others had bafflement read easily in their eyes. None had expected her words and her friends were anything but happy about her statement. How could she just give herself like this, even for them? Her display of leadership that was planted into her by default as a born ruler was not quite correct in this particular moment and, by the way she seemed as observant as ever yet very much more detached to reality, they knew very well she realized it too. And still she did not back down for a second!

"Take me to my room, please… I have had a very …rough day."

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

A/N: So, how was that for a chapter? Now you didn't really think I'd leave Vegeta die so easily, now did you? What B/V story will this be (B) without V! Lol. Anyway… Thanks to every one of you who reviewed the previous chapter! A big 'thank you' to all of you who have been with me up till now and don't turn back now! It all starts to get exciting now!

So, Vegeta's alive and is going to wreak chaos and seek vengeance as soon as he heals…if he doesn't bleed to death, that is, haha! How will life in the mansion turn to be? Will that slimy Saiya-jin keep his promise and treat all of out people well? What will he demand of Bulma? Will Bulma and Vegeta meet again, or will Vegeta's short temper and little patience drive him into death before he can meet with his woman? Stay tuned to find out! And review so the next chapter comes out sooner!

Yours sincerely, Dark Hope Assassin