Part 12 – Safe in the Devil's Embrace
"Salene! Sal?"
Salene rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. "Yes, Ryan?" she called out, sitting up on the bed.
Ryan dashed into the room, his eyes wide. "KC told me he saw you throwing up in the sewer," he said breathlessly, sitting down on the bed.
Salene recoiled, inwardly cursing the little snitch. She wondered if he had told Lex and Lex had encouraged him to pass it onto Ryan out of spite because of their argument the other night. She sighed and looked at Ryan dully.
"It's not the bulimia if that's what you think."
Ryan shook his head. "You can tell me Sal. Please. I helped you before, I can do it again!"
"It is not the bulimia! I'm over that Ryan! When will you listen to me?" Salene demanded, standing up off the bed.
"But then what was it?"
"I was just sick! All of this tinned food got to me. I'll be fine once the new fruit and veg comes from the farm."
"Are you sure that's it? Sal really I---"
Salene rounded on him, her eyes blazing. "If you don't believe me then just say it! I know you don't anyway! Some trust we've got!" she spat, storming out of the room.
She saw Trudy standing just near the door, her eyes wide with concern. "Is everything okay?"
"You were eavesdropping?" Salene near snarled, shaking with anger and the thousand fears and worries that she was hiding.
"No, no, I just heard the shouting. I was worried. Salene, are you all right?" Trudy asked.
"What do you care? You haven't given a damn about anyone but yourself since you got back. That cult really screwed you up!"
Trudy flinched, as if slapped. "No it didn't Sal! Please just talk to me!"
"I don't want to," Salene said simply, before walking off. Her ears were deaf to Trudy's pleading. She fought off tears as she began to run, desperately trying to think of somewhere where she could be alone. Just alone - for once.
"I need to talk to you."
"Oh? About what?"
Lex walked into the storeroom and shut the door behind him. Alice raised her eyebrows, putting down the clothes she had been folding for the next trading market.
"This looks interesting. Very cosy indeed," Alice joked.
Lex squared his jaw. He exhaled heavily and gave her a smouldering look. How was he supposed to go about this? If he said the wrong thing… well, Alice was a big girl, she'd down him in a second. He had to be careful, very careful. And not just because of the threat of physical harm either. If he hurt Alice, Tai-San would never accept him. She'd hate him for doing just what she'd been trying to avoid.
Alice placed her hands on her hips. "I haven't got all night. Some of us want to finish our work and go to bed Lexy boy."
"Yeah… right… it's just— Tai-San, she's got this idea in her head." Lex licked his lips and began to fidget.
"Yeah?"
"She seems to think… that you're in love with me. I've told her she's wrong. I mean, we're pals, right? We've got each other's back and all?"
Alice just looked at him, her expression remaining unchanged.
"It's just I don't want any confusion or anyone to get hurt, if I… y'know, if I'm with someone… someone else," Lex said haltingly, fearing to look her in the eye.
"Oh? Is this all you wanted to say? Because like I said, I have work to do." Alice returned to folding the clothes, her face set in a hard expression.
"Alice… we're okay, right? I mean, Tai-San was wrong, wasn't she?"
"Tai-San can be a space cadet at times Lex, you know that," Alice said nonchalantly.
"I just thought, you being her best friend and all. I just thought she'd know. I hoped she was wrong… because we've got a great friendship here Alice," Lex said.
"Yeah Lex, a great… friendship," Alice replied.
Lex could easily sense her decidedly unfriendly tone. He didn't want to push it. He had talked to her. He'd said what needed to be said. Tai-San couldn't fault him now. Alice had told him they were friends and nothing more. He had what he needed.
"All right. Well, good... great! I'm glad we talked about this! I just didn't want any confusion Alice. But there isn't any, so yeah, good! Me and Ryan, we'rethinking of having a card game or something sometime, just come on over and join, okay? Okay," Lex grinned and left the room in a hurry. He paused outside the door, glad it went off without any major hysterics. That he simply could not have dealt with.
Just then though, Tai-San appeared across the Mall with Patsy and Cloe, and he forgot all about it. He took a breath and sauntered over.
"Hey can I talk to you?"
"Lex, I'm with the girls."
"Scram kids, we've got stuff to talk about," Lex said to them, turning the two of them around and pushing them away.
Tai-San glared at him. "Lex! Leave them alone! We're practising for the dance competition."
"Right… the dance competition. Look, this is important, it's about Alice."
Tai-San paused and considered this, then looked at the girls. "Okay, look, you two start without me. I'll be right after you."
They didn't look too happy, but went anyway, after Lex glared at them.
Tai-San sighed, crossing her arms. "So what is this about Alice?"
"I talked to her! I asked her straight out if she was in love with me in any way, shape or form and she most certainly is not. Tai-San we are free to do whatever we like. She more or less gave us her blessing!"
Tai-San looked at him sceptically. "You spoke to Alice?"
"Yes! Of course I did. I did it for you."
"Lex…"
"What?" Lex could sense an irritated tone in her voice.
"Just what were you expecting Lex? For me to fall into your arms? I don't work like that. Life isn't as simple as that. My reservations weren't just about Alice's feelings, but… but about you."
Lex made a face. "What reservations do you have about me?"
"I have many. Like your temper. Like how you go against everything Bray does for the good of this tribe. Like how you want power and control over everything. Like how you change your mind every five minutes over who and what you want…"
Lex's face darkened as if thunder had passed over it.
"You're angry Lex, I can tell," she said softly.
"Really? You're a sharp one," Lex shot back sarcastically.
Tai-San's shoulders dropped. "I'm sorry. This is as muchmy fault as it is yours. We never should have given in to temptation!" she insisted.
Lex glowered. "Temptation? Is that all it was? I'm tired of trying to please you all of the time and getting nothing in return! I'm tired of never getting any indication that you care about me at all! I'm tired of you putting everyone and everything else above me!"
Tai-San's apologetic expression faded and she became annoyed. "Lex you don't own me. This is exactly why I'm saying no to you – because you can't handle the fact that sometimes people say no! You don't like when you don't get your way and it's not a good quality. It's not good for a relationship either. I'm sorry Lex. Please just leave me to help the girls."
With that she walked off, leaving him alone. Lex stared after her, incensed. So that was it…
'What is it with me?' Lex inwardly demanded.
Why was it that when he had something good going, it inevitably went bad? He had thought Tai-San was the one. Apparently she didn't feel the same. Well he was done with her. Done with trying to be the perfect man for her. He'd do whatever the hell he wanted from now on, life had always been better when he had anyway.
"Sal?"
"What?
"Are you okay?" Trudy asked, sitting down beside her, with a gurgling Brady in her lap.
Salene was nursing a cup of hot chocolate which she held with both hands, letting it warm them. The café was deserted and she was doing what she often did, sitting alone and thinking. She felt Trudy's eyes on her and looked up. They were looking on her with a warm, comforting stare, as if she hadn't just screamed her head off at her earlier that day. Right then, Trudy looked so much like she had during the early days of the Mallrats, after she had gotten over her depression. She had been Salene's best friend at one point, helping her through her bulimia.
"I'm fine," Salene replied automatically.
"Salene," Trudy said admonishingly. "I know you. I'm your friend. Now please tell me?" she asked.
Salene looked right at Trudy. "My friend? For someone who's my friend, you haven't exactly been breaking down my door to talk to me. I mean I've barely seen you since you got back. It's like you've been in hiding!" she exclaimed.
Trudy looked startled and she snapped her mouth shut. "I'm so sorry Sal. I--- I don't know what's come over me. Being with the Chosen was just awful and I've been trying to deal with it on my own…"
"You should've come to me," Salene snapped irritably. "You helped me with my bulimia… I could've helped you with this. But no, no, you had to try and do it all alone. Not talking to anyone, not leaving your room, retreating into your own little space. Having the problem weigh down on you, not knowing what to do, who to turn to, how to not feel like this anymore!" she cried.
Trudy's lips parted in shock. "Sal… this isn't about me anymore, is it?"
Salene's chest heaved in the aftermath of her outburst. She shook her head mutely.
"Then tell me! Sweetie, what is it? What is wrong?" Trudy asked desperately.
"I'm pregnant!" Salene blurted out suddenly, her eyes blazing.
Trudy's eyes widened, startled. She looked completely startled and disorientated for a few moments, before smiling shakily. "Well that's great Salene. I bet Ryan's really happy about it. He was always great with Brady," she said comfortingly, looking at her daughter.
"I don't want it!" Salene exclaimed. "I mean… I do want it. I just--- I don't know! I don't know! I'm so confused!"
"What does Ryan say? I'm sure he'd be glad to help you deal with this."
"Ryan doesn't know. Ryan never knew! I married him… and I didn't tell him I was already pregnant! He'll kill me when he finds out! He'll think I only married him because of the baby… and it's true! I don't love him Trudy! I don't love him at all!" Salene cried, her emotions building up.
Trudy looked taken-aback. "But--- but Salene, the wedding… you were so happy…"
"I was happy because I had to be happy. What would it have looked like if I was miserable on my wedding day? I did it so my baby would have a father… so I wouldn't end up like…"
"Like me," Trudy finished for her.
"I'm sorry."
"No Salene, don't be. It's true. And I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I haven't been there for you, but I will be now, okay? I'll help you with this, if you help me," Trudy said softly.
Salene frowned. "Are you still afraid? Because of the Chosen?"
"No… no, I'm afraid… because I'm pregnant too."
Lex braced himself against the wall and cradled his right hand, trying to ignore the stinging pain.
After his fight with Tai-San, he'd stormed across the Mall and ended up punching a wall – hard. It had done nothing to dissipate his anger, but only ended up getting him even more riled. He gritted his teeth and suppressed a growl as he stalked off toward the café to wash his bleeding knuckles.
How dare she?
Tai-San had the innate ability to be one stuck up cow when she wanted to be. He had been perfect, faithful, and trustworthy and she still doubted him! If she had a reason to, he might be less angered, but she had no reason! None whatsoever. No matter how hard he tried, people would never believe in him, never!
"What did you say?"
Lex looked up on hearing the exclamation. He was coming closer to the café and slowed his pace. That was Salene's voice. Surely she and Ryan weren't arguing in the café at this time of night? He rounded the corner and saw that she was actually with Trudy. The two girls sat at a table together under the muted lighting.
"I'm pregnant too. Sal, please don't tell anyone. I'm trusting you with this," Trudy said in a pleading voice.
Lex stopped short and gaped. Had he just heard right or were his ears deceiving him? Trudy was pregnant… again? And hadn't she said 'I'm pregnant too'? Did that mean Salene was also pregnant? And who the hell was the father of Trudy's baby? And when had it been conceived? And--- Lex's mind was overloading with questions. So much so, that he didn't even noticed when Salene looked up and stared straight at him. She looked as horrified as he felt.
"Lex," she whispered.
Trudy's body moved so quickly that she startled the sleeping Brady considerably. The toddler sighed and went back to sleep, whereas her mother's fright was not so easily quelled. "Oh my God," she uttered, her eyes wide.
"How much did you hear Lex?" Salene asked, standing up.
"Enough," he stated, walking into the café fully. "There some kind of baby boom going on?"
Neither Salene nor Trudy cracked a smile.
"Lex you can't tell anyone!" Trudy exclaimed in a panicked tone.
Lex cocked his head and remained silent.
"We're not joking Lex. You can't say a word," Salene said seriously.
"Girls, girls, calm down. It's not like you can hide being pregnant. People are gonna find out," he said plainly.
"But not yet!" Salene pleaded.
"They wouldn't understand!" Trudy added.
Both girls were now standing right in front of him and both looked like their worlds were ending.
"You. How are you pregnant?" Lex demanded, staring at Trudy.
Trudy's mouth snapped shut and she closed her eyes. "I can't say," she said quietly.
"You can't say?" Lex snorted derisively. "Well just 'cause you're keeping your mouth shut, doesn't mean I have to. In fact, how about I go and find Bray and we can all have a little chat?"
"No!" Trudy exclaimed.
"Lex! Don't do this!" Salene admonished.
"Don't do what?" he snapped. "We don't keep secrets in this tribe. Not anymore. It tears us apart."
"Lex, I can't tell you!" Trudy insisted, her face extremely pale.
Lex grunted and walked away from them, heading to the sink. The two of them followed him closely. "You girls are crazy if you think I'm keeping this to myself," he muttered.
"What happened to your hand?" Salene asked, obviously trying to change the subject.
"I punched a wall. Anymore questions?" Lex asked roughly.
"Yes… why?" Salene asked.
"It needed punching. Stop changing the subject… Mommy," Lex said pointedly.
Trudy heaved a pained sigh. She gently handed her slumbering daughter to Salene and went to Lex. "Come here," she said shortly. She grabbed his bleeding hand and shoved it under the tap.
Lex hissed as the water stung the cuts on his knuckles. Trudy had a fierce look in her eye that he didn't quite trust. "Look, just give me the straight and honest truth babe, and I'll forget all about your impending motherhood… and hers too." Lex jerked his head toward Salene.
Trudy's lips quivered slightly as she rubbed a cloth over his knuckles. She dropped the cloth but kept hold of his hand. "Lex… I got pregnant while I was with the Chosen. A Chosen guard…" she trailed off, closing her eyes. Her grip on his hand tightened and he resisted the urge to wince.
"A Chosen guard what?" he prompted tentatively. "Did he--- were you… forced?"
"No, no…" Trudy insisted. "It's complicated. He wasn't like the others or like the Guardian. He wasn't evil or crazy, he was normal and he helped me and I-- I loved him and--"
Trudy broke down right there and then, letting Lex's hand go from her killer grip. Her nail marks were embedded in his palm. Salene, with her free arm, pulled Trudy toward her and pressed her to her shoulder.
"Can't you see she's upset? Will you leave it now Lex? You know the 'straight and honest truth'!" Salene said angrily.
Lex flexed his injured hand, making a face at the imprints of Trudy's nails. "Yeah, I know her 'straight and honest truth'. What about yours? Why don't you want Ryan to know about his kid?"
"Because I'm not ready for him to know. It's my child too Lex and it's my decision to tell him when and how I like, so don't you dare do it for me!" Salene said sternly, with a fiery look in her eye.
Lex held his hands up. "I'd do no such thing. You two better own up soon though. There's only so long someone can try to hide something like this!" he said casually.
"That's our problem," Salene snapped, rubbing the still sobbing Trudy's back. "Now keep your mouth shut and leave us be!"
Lex was taken aback by her tone, but put it down to hormones. "Gladly. Have fun planning the baby showers," he shot at her callously.
He grabbed a rag from under the sink and wrapped it around his hand. Salene shot him a glare as he exited the café but he ignored it. Having one screaming brat in the tribe was difficult enough, but three? They must be the most productive tribe in the whole damn City.
It didn't seem like Trudy's time with the Chosen was so bad after all if she'd managed to fit in some fun and games with a Chosen guard. And Salene… what were her real reasons for keeping her pregnancy from Ryan? He was Lex's best friend, Lex felt a duty to telling him, but then again, a pregnant woman could be extremely dangerous when she wanted to be. And now he had two of them to deal with.
Lex sighed. Like he didn't have enough to put up with.
As he walk round the left side of the Mall, he saw Bray on the other side, yawning. They nodded at each other, with no friendly platitudes being exchanged as each walked on by. Lex reached his room, and sat on his bed. He took off his shirt and lay back. He didn't think he'd be able to sleep what with all his troubles and startling new information he had just discovered… but in true Lex fashion, he fell straight to sleep anyway.
Coming soon in Part 13 – A Satire of Stability:
- A cheerful Spike hunts for Ebony
- Bray makes a chilling discovery that throws not only him, but the entire tribe into chaos
- In a rare outburst for Jack, and a not so rare one for Lex, both tell Bray how it is as his denial blinds him
- The Mallrats get a new addition to their tribe
And more…
