Note: Okay here's the Collins/Benny backstory. I can't decide if I want to keep Benny in or not. Review and let me know if you want to see more of him.
Disclaimer: Still don't own the characters. They're property of Jonathan Larson and estate.
Roger grabbed his guitar and headed back to the fire escape. He stopped short. "Mark, gimme the keys. He's here."
"That was fast."
Roger shrugged. "Must've been in the neighborhood."
"Hey Benny! Catch!" Roger called as he dropped the keys.
A few minutes later, the loft door slid open. Maureen started a pot of coffee, sensing it was going to be a long night. Mark and Roger stood shuffling for a minute before Roger shut the window.
"Hey," Benny said.
"Hi," Mark said. Roger nodded to him but wouldn't look at him.
"So what's up?"
"Why didn't you tell us he was your brother?" Maureen asked.
Benny sank down to sit on one of the stools at the table. He shrugged. "What'd he tell you guys?"
Mark looked away. Roger headed for his room. Maureen put a hand on his chest and shook her head. He sighed and rolled his eyes, but joined Benny at the table.
"Well? What did he tell you?" Benny asked again.
"He didn't," Mark said.
"Then how'd you guys….where is he? He sick? Where is he?"
"He's dead," Roger mumbled.
"What?"
"Dead. He's dead."
Benny's eyes widened. He rested his elbows on the table and let his head fall to his hands. Mark waited a minute before breaking the silence. "Benny? You okay?"
"When?"
"This morning."
"Was he alone?"
Maureen gave a small smile, her eyes glittering with tears. "I was with him. He wasn't alone."
Benny nodded.
"So what? What's the deal? You guys never once said you were brothers or mentioned even being related. Then Maureen finds….wait. What did you find?" Mark asked.
"Birth certificate. Said his father was Benjamin Coffin II."
Benny nodded. "Half brother. He, my dad, had an affair with my mom."
"Did you guys know?"
"After my mom got pregnant, the old man left Collins and his mother. Later on, when I got older, Collins's mom died. I was, like, eight. Don't remember what happened to her. So Collins came to live with us. He was eleven that summer."
"Why didn't you guys tell us?" Roger asked.
"When, uh, when I was a sophomore in high school, Collins came out. Parents threw him out, cut him off entirely."
"And so you did too?"
"God, Roger, give me some credit. He's my brother. I tried to keep in contact with him but my parents threatened to kick me out. Collins could make it on his own. He was almost nineteen, planning on leaving soon anyway. I was fifteen years old! What the hell was I supposed to do?"
"How about grow a goddamn backbone? How about stick up for people you care about? How about—"
Benny stood up. "Look, I've told you what happened. I listened to my parents until I went away to school. The minute I left that house I started looking for him. I spent three months wandering Santa Fe because one time he mentioned that it seemed like a cool place. I spent every dime I could, every minute I could, looking for him. When I finally found him, when I finally saw him again, it was too late. He thought the same thing: I'd abandoned him."
"Sounds to me like you did," Roger said, ignoring the warning glances from Mark and Maureen.
"Maybe I did, but…shit…I was fifteen fucking years old! I didn't know what else to do! I'm not like you, Roger! I can't just do whatever the fuck I please and not care what it does to others. I made a decision. Yeah, it was the wrong one but nothing I do now can change it. So fine, I'm the asshole, I'm the screw-up, I'm whatever the hell you want. I'm leaving….Maureen, call me if you guys need anything at all and please let me know if you need to know anything or whatever. And please tell me when the funeral is."
Mark and Maureen stood in silence as Benny left. Roger stormed into his room and shut the door, not quite slamming it. Mark picked up his camera.
"I'm gonna go film."
"You okay?"
"Yeah. I'll be back soon."
Maureen nodded and went to Roger's door. She knocked lightly. "Roger?"
There was no answer, so she tried the door. It was open. Roger lay on his bed staring up at the ceiling. Maureen sighed and sat beside him.
"You okay?"
"Fine."
"Don't lie to me, Rog."
"Who says I'm lying?"
"I do. I know you well enough to know when you're lying."
Maureen stared down at him, noticing the tears in his eyes. "What is it?"
"Huh?"
"This about anybody in particular?"
"He lied."
"Who?"
"Benny. He just sat there and lied to our faces. Collins is dead and even now he can't respect him."
"Honey, what could he have lied about?"
"He didn't look for Collins. Not once. After we moved into the loft, when we first met, I helped him find Benny. That son of a bitch said he didn't have a brother. Mark moved him into the loft six months later. They'd roomed together in college."
"And did Benny say anything then?"
"No. Collins did. I told him I hadn't been able to find his brother and that it was a coincidence that this guy had the same name."
"Roger, Collins wasn't stupid."
"I know. He knew the only reason I'd say I couldn't find Benny would've been because Benny wanted nothing to do with him. So fine, Collins pretended they'd never met and avoided him at all costs."
"Poor Collins."
"No shit. Only reason I didn't beat the hell out of Benny was because Collins made me promise not to. Even after all the shit that went down….even after Benny…he still looked out for him."
Maureen nodded. "That's why he always got so quiet when we talked shit about Benny…"
Roger nodded again.
"We can't change what happened, Rog. All we can do is remember Collins. Remember people that loved Collins and showed that love."
Roger nodded. Maureen dipped her head down and gave a small kiss to his closed lips. When she pulled back, a single tear streaked out of the corner of his eye.
"We can't," he mumbled.
Maureen wiped the tear. "I know."
He thought she'd get up and leave. Instead, Maureen lay down beside him, her head on his chest. His arms slid around her, cautious and timid. She stayed still until she thought he was asleep. When her tears spilled onto his shirt, she didn't dare to look up at him. If she had, she would've seen his tears falling too.
