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Chapter 21: Secret Keepers
As troubling as Lucina's personal vendetta against me is, the swift departure of her and her group after the tournament means I have no real opportunity to learn more. It doesn't bode particularly well for me, but I'm afraid this is another of those things I'll have to take a 'wait and see' approach on.
The same goes for the fucking deadlord, unfortunately. Speaking with Flavia revealed the rather troubling fact that the entire army of Risen Vaike and I fought that day on the bridge has vanished completely. It seems impossible that so many hundreds of monsters could just disappear like that, but the Feroxi have sent Griffons all over the north, and not a single trace of them remains. In a way, it makes that horrible creature even more terrifying. I can only pray it's a long time before I run into its like again.
Who am I kidding? With my luck I'm likely to run into another Deadlord by the end of the month.
If it's gonna happen, this is certainly the time for it. The Shepherds will be back on the road by the end of the day, Chrom having sorted out initial terms of the alliance with Flavia over the past three days since the party. All that's left to do is to bring all the paperwork back to Emmeryn so she can review it. Then comes the haggling back and forth over terms until things are finalized. Even the Feroxi have no cure for the tedium of political negotiations.
We've been in Regna Ferox for months longer than was originally hoped, so the journey home will be damn near entirely spent on the road. Save for a brief stopover to resupply in Gelida Dominus, we won't stop travelling until we're back in Ylisstol.
It'll be nice to get back to the old barracks. I'm looking forward to returning to my room. Sparse as it may be, I got rather attached to it, even if I only spent a little over a month with the room before we left for Regna Ferox…
Fucking hell. I've spent more of my time in this world stuck in a cage than I've spent in my own room. It hurts to realize. It… I…
I bring down my axe.
I have work to do. No more time to spend spacing out like a useless piece of shit. These carts need to be loaded. I drop to one knee to grab a crate-
And immediately recoil as a hand grabs me by the ear and tugs sharply to the left. "Ah! What the fuck?" A flash of yellow moves in front of my eyes. I fail to hide my grimace. "Lissa, what the hell are you doing?"
"What am I doing? What are you doing?" Lissa frowns. "I take my eyes off of you for half an hour and as soon as I get back here you're breaking my rules!"
"You're fussing too much." I roll my eyes. "A few crates won't hurt me. I'm pretty well healed at this point."
"Until you've become a healer you don't get to make that call! You're lucky I'm letting you try marching instead of riding in the carts with Noire!" She grabs for my ear again, but I evade her easily, hopping back to my feet and catching her by the wrist. "Ah! Ben, let go! Listen to your medic!"
"You're adorable when you pout, you know that?" I smirk down at her. She flushes bright red and I release her, chuckling. "Alright, that's enough roughhousing, princess. I'm an injured man, you know."
"Geez!" She stamps a foot and stalks off in a huff. "I don't know why I bother sometimes!"
"Hmm. Might have teased her a bit too much there." I muse. I was kinda undermining her a little with that one. It is true that I feel better though. Singing set me back a day or so in my recovery due to strained lungs, but I'm back on track now. Still not recovered enough to be on my feet for the full march home, but definitely well enough for some crates. Guess I better not push my luck though.
"That girl is much too nosy for her own good." A deep voice intones behind me.
"Maybe so, but her heart's in the right place." I shrug, turning to face the speaker. "You're the new guy, huh?"
"Lon'qu." The man in question replies curtly. "And you are Ben, the killer of slavers."
"Well that's a gloomy title." I frown.
"There are also those who call you Ben the Butcher. Rumors have spread quickly amongst the Feroxi."
"What the fuck." I stare at Lon'qu in disbelief. "What the actual fuck?"
Lon'qu shifts in discomfort. "You didn't know."
"Hell no I didn't." I grimace and turn aside. "Would have happily spent the rest of my life not knowing that. Where the fuck did a nickname like that come from?"
"As I understand it, from Flavia's personal guard. They came up with it while searching through the wake of your… handiwork." Lon'qu sighs. "Enough talk of this. The conversation has strayed far from what I intended."
"What did you intend then?" I scowl at him.
"My intent was to thank you." Lon'qu replies.
"Thank me?"
"Ambrose and Julia. The soldiers you saved. They were… acquaintances of mine. Closer than most."
"Oh." I blink in surprise. "Oh damn, okay. You know each other well, then?"
"They are frequently brought as guards when the Khans meet. I have come to know them well over the years." Lon'qu nods. "Were it not for you, two good soldiers would be dead. And many more besides."
"I… well thanks I guess." I frown.
"I've done nothing for you that is worthy of thanks." Lon'qu replies. He looks me over, and frowns. "You have a long road ahead of you, Ben. Once you have recovered, I would request a spar."
"Uhh, I'm happy to oblige, but I'm not sure what good it would be…" I scratch my head uneasily. "I'm pretty damn sure even at my best you could wipe the floor with me."
"There is benefit to be had, even in an uneven duel." Lon'qu replies. "Yes… I would gladly duel you, if it meant a chance to learn what I lack."
"What do you mean by that?"
"A personal matter. Think nothing of it." Lon'qu shakes his head. "I wish you a swift recovery."
"Uhh, yeah, thanks. Looking forward to working with you." I reply, even as the man stalks away. That was weird as hell. Not sure what to make of that guy. All I really remember about him from the games is that he freaks out around women. So everything about that conversation was outside of my realm of understanding.
Well, not everything. "Ben the Butcher. Fucking… really?" I mutter. I wonder briefly if Flavia knew about this, but dismiss the thought entirely. No way in hell she'd have any patience for that sort of petty bullshit. If she wanted to fuck with me she'd be far more straightforward about it. Besides, Lon'qu did say that it was her guards that started spreading that title. And damned if that doesn't leave me with some heavy suspicions.
But that's all they are. Suspicions. And as much as I'd like to find the sick fuck who decided to take the most horrific night of my life and ensure I was remembered by it and pound their head in, I can't. Or rather, I shouldn't. Hell, for all I know somebody could have thought they were doing me a favor. I imagine there's plenty of Feroxi who would think a title like that is pretty badass.
I think I want to throw up at the thought of this. I look back down at the crate. Lissa's not around at the moment, but I don't really feel like I have the energy to do any lifting anymore.
Guess I'll just have to wallow in my own head until we finally leave.
It's a little over an hour by the time the rest of the Shepherds finish packing the carts and assemble around the caravan. And I spend most of that time hiding. I just wander out of the courtyard, find a nice corner within earshot, and park my ass until I hear headcounts starting. When I wander back in nobody really questions it. Lissa shoots me a suspicious glance, but in the end she just seems happy I wasn't straining myself.
I meander my way over to Frederick and wave. "Hey Frederick, we finally getting on the road?"
Frederick looks over at me, nods briefly, and returns to his checklist. "Ah Ben, there you are. I missed you while we were packing."
"I tried helping out earlier, but Lissa gave me hell for it. She doesn't think I should be lifting anything heavy yet."
"I see." Frederick looks back over at me seriously. "Will you be fit to march?"
"I've talked Lissa into that much, at least." I frown. "I'm gonna do my best today, and we'll see how it goes. I'll let you or Lissa know if I need the cart."
"Hmm… very well." Frederick looks thoughtful. "I will trust you to properly take your own limits into account. Once we're back in Ylisse I'll be sure to prepare a proper training plan to aid in your rehabilitation."
"I appreciate it. Sick to fucking death of feeling like a goddamn invalid." I roll my eyes. "The sooner my body recovers, the better."
At this Frederick gives me an inscrutable look. "Yes. Healing will be of the utmost importance. You are eager to get back into the fight, then?"
"I don't like sitting by while all these kids are fighting." I look over to the others and grimace.
"The two of us are rather young ourselves." Frederick sighs. "Twenty-six is certainly older than most of this group, but you are hardly a wizened old man."
"Twenty seven, actually." I reply blankly. Frederick looks over to me and I shrug. "My birthday came two months ago."
"Hmm. Lissa will be horrified when she learns that she missed it." Frederick replies. Then the implications of my statement sink in, and he looks over to me in shock. "Wait, so you mean to say that your birthday-"
"Funny story, that." I reply, looking over to Frederick with a dry grin. "I did the math a while ago; my birthday was the day I broke out of that jail cell." And boy was that a fun coincidence to discover.
"Gods…"
I turn and stare at the floor, unable to keep the smile up any longer. "Well, I stopped celebrating my birthdays years ago anyways. Not much of a change, there."
Frederick can't think of a reply.
We're nearly out of town when we hear a voice yelling after us. This isn't necessarily unusual; the Feroxi have been cheering for Chrom and the other Shepherds who fought in the arena for days. What makes this special though, is the way Frederick seems to slump at the head of the column when he hears the voice.
"Yoohoo! Aren't you all forgetting somebody?"
"No." Frederick mutters.
"Ah!" Chrom turns back with a surprised expression. "Anna!"
Oh, that's interesting. I turn back to see a red-headed woman erupt from the crowd behind us.
"Make a path, make a path, can't you see I have places to be?" Anna complains, darting smoothly around a burly man carrying several large crates, and emerging triumphantly before us. Unlike the Shepherds I've seen so far, she's quite different from the pictures from the game, swapping the cloak and collar of the trickster class for a colossal backpack and more earthy tones. She bears the weight as though it doesn't exist, practically skipping towards us as she waves a cheery hello (which can only mean danger from a woman as shrewd as her), "There you are! You didn't think I was about to let you leave without me, did you?"
"I had hoped."
"Frederick!" Chrom looks over to the knight with a frown, before turning back to Anna. "I must admit, I wasn't expecting to see you again. When you left us back in Gelida Dominus I was under the impression that you weren't intending to return."
"What?" Anna frowns. "I told your manservant there that I'd be rejoining you all once I was finished doing business here."
Chrom's face falls flat. "Frederick."
"Ahem. My apologies, I must have misunderstood your intentions." Frederick replies with a smile that looks… just fake as hell.
"Oho?" Anna smirks. "Well, no harm done! I suppose we'll just have to find some way for you to make it up to me. Off the top of my head, I'm thinking a whole lot of free labor."
"Done." Chrom replies instantly.
"What? Milord, I-"
"Would be happy to serve our valued member of the Shepherds as a penalty for lying to me and nearly abandoning her." Chrom looks over to Frederick and frowns. "Honestly Frederick, I know you have your misgivings about new recruits, but this is excessive even for you."
"Other recruits are not nearly so obvious in their ulterior motives." Frederick grumbles, before straightening in his saddle. "Very well then. I will do my best to right my misdeed and uphold my honor as a knight."
"Well aren't you sweet!" Anna grins, strolling up to the rest of the group and looking Frederick up and down. "Oh yes, a strong fellow like you will be very helpful to a sweet little merchant like me."
"I look forward to serving you in the future, then." Frederick replies through gritted teeth.
"Oh, why wait?" She hauls her pack off her shoulders and lifts it with one hand, raising the other to her lips in a false pout. "I had to do a lot of running to catch up with you fine fellows, so I'm feeling awfully tired. Maybe you can help me?"
"We have carts for such things." Frederick glares grumpily down at her.
"Oh, but they've all been packed so well, and my bag is so heavy! I fear if I were to put my bag in the cart as it is, I could squash everyone's belongings! I couldn't bear to do that to my new friends."
Frederick opens his mouth to protest, but a glance from Chrom changes his tune. "Fine. I will take your bag. But only until we make camp for the evening! We will have your things packed with the rest once we set out again tomorrow."
"Well thank you so much for that! You sure know how to make a girl feel welcome!" Anna grins, and tosses the bag up to him with one arm. Frederick reaches out to catch it, but apparently he really underestimated Anna's strength, because the air seems to rush out of him as the bag hits him. For a brief instant I think the man will fall out of the saddle, but he recovers immediately. He sends Anna a suspicious glare, then dismounts his horse and stomps to the front of the line. His horse snorts indignantly, as though insulted that Frederick thought he couldn't take the weight.
By this point I and several of the other Shepherds are struggling not to burst out laughing at what just transpired. Chrom looks coolly over us all, before he breaks into a grin as well and gives us a wink, confident that Frederick won't notice. "Well Shepherds, most of you have met Anna already, she was a great help in dealing with Vincent. Anna, the faces you haven't met are Ben, Donnel, Severa, Noire, and Lon'qu. Ben, Donnel, and Severa have been with us for several months now; Noire and Lon'qu are both recent additions to our group. I hope you all learn from each other."
"Nice to meet you all!" Anna waves cheerfully. "I'm sure we'll all get along just great. I'm a merchant by trade, so if you ever find yourself needing supplies I'll be happy to help you out!"
"For a reasonable fee, no doubt." Severa replies sarcastically.
"Well aren't you quick on the uptake!" Anna grins.
"Alright, you'll all have plenty of time to get acquainted on the road." Chrom cuts in. "Let's get back to marching. Oh, and Ben, speak up if you need to join Noire on the cart, I know you're still recovering."
"I heard it all from Lissa and Frederick, don't worry. I'll be alright for now." I raise a hand in acknowledgement. Chrom nods, satisfied with the response, and gets everyone moving again.
To my surprise, shortly after we resume marching Anna beelines over to me. "So, you're Ben, right?"
"That's me." I give her a smirk. "That was pretty funny, what you pulled with Frederick."
"What can I say? I had to make him suffer a little bit." Anna gives me a devious grin. "I almost lost out on a serous payday because of him. I mean, working for the royal family of Ylisse? That's a big chance for a merchant like me."
"I can imagine." I nod along. "So, what's a merchant like you talking to a guy like me for?"
"Oh, two reasons, really." Anna replies. "The first was mostly just curiosity. I was with everyone when they got word that you survived that whole ordeal. Wanted to know what the fuss was about."
"Makes sense." I nod along. "I don't plan on talking about what happened to me though. It was… it was a bad time."
"Fair enough." Anna shrugs. "If reality is anything like the rumors I've heard that's a hornet's nest I won't be prodding at. Nothing to be gained from that sort of bad business. I'll move right along to the second reason then. I wanted to ask about your clothing."
"My clothing?" I look down. I'm wearing all my old clothes from earth, with the exception of my jacket and shoes (which I need to (finally) pick up when we get to Gelida Dominus). Sweater, jeans, t-shirt, all plainly visible, since it's not quite a cold enough day that I feel the need to button up. "Ah, I suppose this sort of thing would be pretty interesting to a merchant, huh?"
"Oh definitely. But probably not for the reasons you suspect." Anna grins. "I'm mostly just wondering how you managed to afford it. Material like that is veeeeery hard to come by around here."
"Certainly true…" I look at her suspiciously. I wasn't aware that people here could come by it at all.
"Right, and you don't look like nobility. No offense meant, of course. So I'm just wondering where you got it from."
"I'm not offended." I shrug. "Not really a fan of poncy noble types anyways."
"Glad to hear it! Now if you could stop dodging the question, please?" She smiles sweetly, but at this point I notice a dangerous glint in her eye.
"I'm getting the impression that this is something personal for you." I say suspiciously.
"What can I say? Around these parts material like that is pretty much a family exclusive product. So seeing somebody wearing it so casually without the coin to pay for it makes me wonder." Her hand strays to her sword as her smile fades. "You haven't… 'met' one of my sisters by any chance, have you?"
"That's some impressive dedication to your family, threatening me like that in front of so many friends." I raise an eyebrow at her.
"Family happens to be the one thing I value more than money."
"Huh. Good sense of priorities there." I nod along. "At any rate, you're barking up the wrong tree. I got all this clothing from… an outside source."
"An outside… there is no other source!" Anna protests.
"Oh, there's definitely one I can think of." I reply. "It's not really a secret amongst the Shepherds, so I might as well tell you now: I'm from another world."
Anna's eyes widen at that. "You don't mean… you came through the gate?"
"Uhh… probably?" I look at her suspiciously. "You know about the gate?"
"Know about it? My family practically runs the thing." Anna scoffs. "There's all sorts of myths and legends about the Outrealm gate in these lands, but nobody knows anything for sure about it. There's a reason for that, though: it's darn near impossible for anyone to navigate the thing. If you stumble across it you're likely to just get sucked away to another world, and good luck getting back once that happens!"
"So, when you say your family runs it though…"
"That is a very long story. And most of it involves family secrets. As in, the sort of family secrets we kill to protect." Anna stews on things for a moment or two. "Since you know about the Outrealm Gate already though I can tell you a little, I guess."
"I'd appreciate anything you can tell me. I have a family back home that I haven't seen in months." I reply eagerly.
"Alright, alright, save the sob story, I'm immune to that sort of thing. Give me a minute to think about this." Anna waves me away, and I comply easily. This is already proving to be the most reliable source of information on the Outrealm Gate that I've been able to find since coming here. I want to be in Anna's good books for the foreseeable future.
The two of us walk together in silence for nearly twenty minutes before she finally speaks again. "Alright, what I'm about to say stays between us, got it? Good. Now listen carefully, because I'm only saying this once. The gate is magical. That's obvious, anyone could guess as much. What people don't know is how much of that magic goes into security on the stupid thing. The world connection part? That's easy. Stupidly powerful magic, but simple enough to understand. The hard part comes when you try to figure out all the rules layered on top of that magic.
"The rules are what dictate how you get from one world to another. Walking into the portal is just the beginning, see. Once you're in there's a whole lot of other metaphorical hoops to jump through to get where you need to go, and they're all impossible to find unless you know what to look for. Now, through methods that I will absolutely not be disclosing, my family has figured out the way these rules work. And over many centuries and many generations, my family has become… linked, in a way. Which means that if you want to get to a specific place through that portal…"
"You have to be with a member of your family." I conclude.
"Not quite." Anna grimaces. "You have to be a member of my family. As in, you have to be born into it."
"… oh." I stop marching and stare blankly ahead. "So, you're saying there's nothing at all you can do for me."
"Honestly, that's probably the case." Anna sighs. "Sorry big guy, I know that's not what you wanted to hear. I hate to let a customer down, too."
"If you expect me to pay you for crushing my hopes you have another thing coming, woman." I snap out of my daze and glare at Anna indignantly.
"It's just a figure of speech, don't worry." Anna chuckles. "Trust me, when I'm trying to sell you something, you won't have a clue until long after I've pocketed your gold!"
"Comforting." I reply dryly, resuming my march. "So, there's really nothing you can do for me? Nothing at all?"
Anna frowns, thinking on the matter for a while. "There's nothing I can do, no… But, that might not be the same for the rest of my family. Everyone in my family knows the secret of the gate, but most of us don't actually deal with it too much. We prefer to stay safe and comfortable here in our homeland."
"So there's somebody you can ask?"
"I can sure try!" Anna grins. "It'll have to wait until we get back to Ylisstol though; it takes time to get through the right channels. Our family is a well-kept secret, you know. We can't use just any messenger."
"…Your family sounds like a pain in the ass." I grumble.
Anna laughs brightly at that. "The rules can be a bother at times, but it's part of what makes us so effective at what we do. Trust me, even if we can't get you back ourselves, there isn't a person out there who knows more about Outrealm travel than my family does. We'll get you sorted out."
She certainly sounds confident, though I can't help but feel doubtful. No way are things going to work out that easily for me. Either way though… "I suppose I don't have any better leads. I'd appreciate any help you can give me."
"That's the spirit!" Anna claps me on the back and sends me stumbling. Seriously, her strength is unreal; much greater than I'd expect from her slender arms. Another family secret, no doubt, though if it is I have little interest in this one.
The two of us walk in silence for a while before an important question occurs to me. "Hey, Anna?"
"Hmm?"
"Why are you helping me? What's your angle here?"
"What?" Anna gives me a hurt look (which from a girl like her just screams 'danger'), "Can't a girl just help out one of her new friends out of the goodness of her heart?"
A part of me is feeling suddenly guilty, but I somehow manage to work up enough common sense to push past her pretty face and voice my misgivings. "There's plenty of girls out there who can. But you're not just any girl. You're an Anna. You're too shrewd to help me without something to gain."
"Oh, you smooth talker!" Anna swats me on the arm playfully and grins. "Well, when you put it like that…" She raises a finger to her lips and frowns thoughtfully. "I guess it's because I'm curious?"
"Curious. That's it?" I raise an eyebrow.
"Hey, do not underestimate the value of a healthy sense of curiosity. It'll take you far in this line of work! Nothing more valuable than knowledge, after all!" Anna's grin shifts from playful to sly, a glint appearing in her eye that honestly scares me a little. "I may seem a simple merchant to most, but there is nothing truly simple about an Anna. My family has prospered and profited for centuries. We have knowledge enough that the greatest scholars of this world couldn't hope to fathom its depths. And yet, you are something altogether unusual to me. An enigma. Something… special."
"Oh please. I've never been special in my fucking life." I roll my eyes. "I was always a nobody."
"And then you came here. A regular man. One who had no prior combat experience, but came to this world fighting. You've killed people seemingly without feeling, and survived things that nobody could hope to live through." Anna's grin fades as she examines me. "Can't think of a better word for that than special."
"How did-"
"What did I just say? Knowledge is power. I like to be powerful, so I make it a point to learn things. And while we're talking of knowledge, let's not forget your knowledge either. Fairy tales, I believe Chrom mentioned? You knew the people in this world long before you came here. Really, that you could even think to imply that you're normal after that is laughable." She doesn't so much as crack a grin as she says this.
"That's… it's pretty damn normal where I come from, okay?" I raise my hands defensively, stepping back. "And it's nothing as extensive as what you're implying. I just know some names, a couple of drawings, stuff like that!"
"Hmm. You know, when you say it like that I actually almost believe you. Impressive! But you slipped up earlier. You referred to me as 'an Anna.'"
"Yeah…" I reply, feeling like a weight has settled into my gut. Did she really…?
"I've been talking plenty about my family, but never once did I tell you that we all share the same name." Anna replies, allowing herself a triumphant smirk.
I rack my brain, thinking over the course of this conversation. Shit, she really did play me like that. "I guess one of the other Shepherds must have mentioned it."
"Ooh, not nearly so convincing a liar when things go off script!" Anna replies smugly. "Still pretty good, mind you, but not nearly enough to fool me. Admit it, you know more than you let on."
"…Fine." I reply. "I admit it. I also knew about your family. Not the Outrealm gate stuff, but definitely about the name thing, and that you've been around since at least Hero-King Marth's time."
Anna frowns at that. "Huh. Drat. I was hoping once I caught you in a lie you'd spill a bit more than that."
And under normal circumstances I might have, Anna. But not about this. I've always been a good liar, but I like to think since coming here my practise in the field has become pretty fucking extensive. Especially when it comes to the whole 'your whole world is a literal plaything to me' deal. Even a member of your family will need to put in some serious effort to figure that one out.
"Nothing to spill." I feign a lack of interest, giving Anna a blank look. "I heard a few stories as a kid, wound up here through some weird twist of fate, and did what I had to so that I could fit in. There's nothing else going on here."
"Huh. I'm starting to think you actually believe that." Anna looks over at me curiously. "You really think there's nothing interesting going on with you?"
"I know there isn't." I throw up my hands irritably.
"Not buying it. You really expect me to believe you just showed up here, straight from another world, by pure chance?"
"Anna, I'm serious!" I look over at her with exasperation. "I didn't show up with some grand plan, I don't have any great machinations. I'm just a regular dude, who was sitting around in his apartment, minding his own business, and then… next thing I know I'm standing around in Southtown wondering what the fuck's going on."
Anna grimaces at that. "Your apartment? You're sure about that?"
"Positive." I reply without hesitation. Then I stop and think about that for a moment. "Uhh… These portals wouldn't happen to move, would they?"
"No. No they do not." Anna sighs. "I'm starting to think I'm biting off more than I can chew with you."
"Surprised it took you this long to come to that conclusion. My situation is straight fucked." I reply with a grim chuckle. "So, what's that mean for me? Because there's no way anyone in my world built an apartment complex around an Outrealm gate."
"No, definitely not…" Anna sighs again, longer this time, and I turn to face her fully. "Okay, I'm not sure where the Outrealm gate would be in your world, but my best guess is that…"
"Anna, this is important, please stop stalling and just tell me."
"Is it too late to set a price on this information?" She looks aside guiltily.
"Better fucking believe it is. You're not getting out of this after everything we've talked about."
"Ugh! Alright, alright!" Anna groans. "Best guess: you were brought here by someone."
"…Okay, that makes sense." I nod along. "So… what does that mean?"
"I don't know." Anna replies immediately. I glare at her and she fires one right back. "I'm being serious, Ben! Remember what I said about my family and the gate? Most of us don't have anything to do with it."
"So we're relying on your messengers for that one, too." I grimace. "Wonderful."
"Just… be patient, alright?" Anna grins. "I may embellish details from time to time, but I don't make promises I can't keep! We'll get you figured out, and then I'll get some proper recognition from- from the Shepherds."
I catch that stutter, but from the expression on her face I get the feeling that this is another of those secrets she'll take violent action to protect. And I've seen enough of her strength already to know she'll kick my ass on a good day. So I don't push.
"Oi, Ben, Anna, you two okay back there?" I look over in surprise to see that the rest of the group has gotten a ways ahead of us while we got caught up in our discussion. Stahl is standing at the back of the line and waving to us, and the others are watching on with concern.
"Uhh yeah, sorry about that!" I start to move to catch up, only for Anna to grab my arm and sling it over her shoulders.
"We're okay, Ben was just tiring out is all!" Anna calls out, sending me a quick wink. No Anna, that's not actually okay, you don't know what these people are like!
"Already?" Lissa bounds over in alarm. "I thought you'd recovered better than that!"
"I-I have!" I protest indignantly. "Anna's bullshitting you!"
"Hey, I'm just showing concern for my new friend!" Anna gasps indignantly. "Your pace was slowing down earlier, so I'm worried!"
"Anna, will you please- Ack!" I'm cut off as Anna discreetly hits me in the back, which causes me to stumble. Her other arm comes up to steady me just a little too quickly, and the hit to my chest causes me to burst into a coughing fit.
"Oh geez, you see what I mean?" Anna gasps as Lissa reaches me and starts fussing. "I think I'd better help you to the cart, big guy!"
"Come on Ben, I know you're anxious to get back on your feet, but you need to take it at a proper pace! Get up on that cart straight away, mister!" Lissa scolds me, and I snarl over at Anna through my coughing.
"Kill- hack- you" I wheeze at Anna in a low voice, the coughing proving strong enough that Lissa fails to recognize it as words. Anna definitely gets the message though, if her nervous laughter is anything to go by.
"Ahehe, alright Lissa, leave him to me, I'll get him loaded up." Anna smiles disarmingly and leads me towards the cart. As she draws me away from Lissa she tilts her head a little and mutters into my ear. "This conversation never happened, got it? Anybody asks, I don't know a thing about that Outrealm gate."
"You could have just asked." I growl back through gritted teeth.
"I'm serious, Ben. Nobody hears about this. Not Chrom, not Robin," she turns to face me fully. "And not that redhead kid that's been glaring my way our whole conversation."
"Severa?" I glance briefly in her direction and see that, sure enough, my daughter seems to be giving us both a suspicious glare… which promptly ends as she notices me watching.
Ah, fuck.
"Yeah, I won't be telling her about this, don't worry." I mutter grouchily, as Kellam reaches down to help me into the cart.
"Alright Ben, rest up! It was nice talking to you! I hope you feel better soon!" Anna gives me a too-sweet smile and skips off to chat with Lissa.
"She seems nice." Kellam comments as I take my seat.
"A real charmer, yeah." I deadpan.
"Oh, it'll be alright, Ben. I'm sure you'll be feeling much more fit to march tomorrow."
I can only sigh at the encouragement. "…Right. Thanks Kellam." I shoot him what feels like a pretty feeble smile, but it seems to pacify the guy. He goes back to steering the cart as I settle in.
Noire looks over and opens her mouth to say something, but by this point my expression seems to be grouchy enough that she seems to think better of it. She stares worriedly at me for a moment or two, before huddling away and leaving me to my thoughts again.
My thoughts have not been happy today, so this is by no means a kindness on her part, as much as she may mean it as one. This has been an especially bad day to spend stewing in my own head.
The whole 'Ben the Butcher' thing was bad enough, but now I'm having to deal with a whole different level of bullshit. Because seeing Severa watching my conversation was like waking up to reality.
Anna is the first chance I've seen at returning to my old life, but that chance has come too late. I have commitments here now. Commitments beyond fighting for Ylisse and the royal family. I have a daughter.
And the weight of that fact is suddenly hitting me harder than ever.
It doesn't feel nearly so comfortable this time.
I think I have something of a talent for cosmic irony. I've been victim to it often enough that it seems to come quite naturally to me.
That being said, the whole birthday escape thing wasn't actually planned on my part. I just realized the dates were basically the same while checking my timeline over on a calendar. Well, if I were to be exact, he started his breakout the night before his birthday, and by the time he was done it had passed midnight. I knew poor Ben would be with the slavers during my/his birthday, but that the actual time lined up so well... I had myself a bit of an evil chuckle over that one.
I'll see you all next time!
