Feels like its been a while since I've managed two updates in a month. Still not at the pace I'd like to be getting back to, but hopefully I'll be able to change that in the coming months. Obligatory reminder that reviews are highly conducive to an increase in my motivation and productivity, and that while I am and will always be terrible at responding I always read and enjoy every one I get.


Chapter 29: Growing Pains

The next few days are spent as a sort of recovery and adjustment period for the Shepherds. Recovery from the attack, and adjustment to the changes within the group.

Chrom and Lissa have the worst of it, being both busy and under a very close watch. Of the royal family, only Lissa has managed to find the time to visit the barracks, and when she does so it's under heavy guard. Frederick has remained at the castle as well, unwilling as ever to leave Chrom's side. I and most of the other Shepherds make sure to visit often, helping them in the cleanup and recovery efforts whenever we can.

I'm thankful for the work, not the least of which because I finally find Felicity again in the middle of it all. The hug I give her when I find out she survived the mess is bone-crushing, propriety be damned. A small part of me has been expecting to hear the worst ever since the scare I had in that bloody hallway.

After a day or two, Severa heals enough to be allowed out of the infirmary, and immediately finds herself under the watchful eyes of Sumia, Lissa, and myself. With good reason; the brat constantly tries to find excuses to train, despite being told she isn't recovered enough for the strain of it. A part of me can't help but wonder if she does it on purpose. For all that she complains, the attention still has her flushing.

In the midst of all this I also find the time to talk to her about Cordelia's point from the night of the invasion, about coming clean about the adoption. Her response is to punch me in the kidneys for not thinking of it sooner. Fair enough.

The reveal goes as expected. Congratulations from the other Shepherds, a lot of hugging from Sumia and Lissa in particular, and a very knowing look from Chrom.

There have been quite a few of those looks lately, as a matter of fact. Every time something happens that brings the whole time travel thing to mind he gets this expression that seems to just scream 'secrets!' Bless that man, he can't do the whole subterfuge thing to save his fucking life.

It gets bad enough that the others start asking why he's always staring, which gets annoying fast. I start telling the others that we've become secret lovers, which is amusing until it makes Sumia cry and I'm forced to frantically hunt Chrom down and talk to him properly about it.

The end result of that discussion is that instead of staring at me he gets a look like he's constipated instead. Which suits me just fine since I can just go back to feigning ignorance like I always do while Frederick looks over his meals with a fine toothed comb.

If only the other changes could be handled so easily.

Despite best efforts from certain Shepherds the two newest recruits to the Shepherds are having nothing but trouble fitting in. The first of these is expected. Panne has absolutely zero interest interacting with any of us, despite our best efforts. It took hours of coaxing from Stahl just to find out what foods she can't eat.

That said, she's shown no signs of wishing to leave and the Shepherds are doing their usual social butterfly routine with her, so I'm not particularly concerned in that regard. That weird friendship thing they all do has a way of breaking down social barriers over time.

No, the real problem is Gaius.

Not the least of which because I've been designated the Shepherd's official 'Gaius manager', a role which I take absolutely zero joy in. In fact were somebody to ask me I'd tell them that I'm thoroughly disappointed that it's even necessary (disappointed in both sides, for the record), and somewhat pissed that I'm the one stuck dealing with this bullshit.

I've had to break up six fights in the past week. Six. And my success in mediating these issues has not been stellar. Sully is still convinced that Gaius is responsible for stealing her stuff, Sumia is still refusing to talk to Gaius after an incident with a pie she made for Chrom, and Lissa is ticked off at Maribelle for trying to keep her and Gaius separated. That last grudge will have sorted itself out by this time tomorrow, but it's still distressing to me that I couldn't prevent it.

It comes down to reputation, in the end. Gaius has been… mostly well behaved since joining, the only incident that was really his fault being the time with Sumia. But Frederick has not been shy about informing people that Gaius was the one who let the Plegians into the Castle. And Maribelle is taking every opportunity to push at Gaius as well, dragging his reputation even further into the dirt.

And every time she does this, I'm the one who's called to sort things out. Damn Chrom for never being around to keep the peace. Damn bureaucracy for keeping him away. Damn me for getting myself involved in these situations.

These sort of thoughts have been running through my mind every time I get called on to settle an argument, and the current situation is no different.

I storm into the dining room and see what has to be the most one sided shouting match I've ever seen in my life. Maribelle is doing what she does best, making herself heard and causing anyone fool enough to get in her way the deepest of regrets. The current recipient of her ire is Virion, who seems to be doing his best to defuse the situation, with little success. A part of that might be because Ricken seems to be fanning the flames, clearly providing back up. Maribelle doesn't really need such a thing, but it does seem to be getting her even more worked up than usual.

"Good, you are here." I turn to my right to see Panne approaching, expression thunderous. "My patience for these petty squabbles is swiftly reaching an end, man-spawn. Make an effort to solve the problem permanently this time."

"Easier said than done." I snap irritably. "If I could spare myself this bullshit just like that I'd have done so in the first place."

"What nonsense." She stares flatly at me. "How is it that you man-spawn manage to make things so needlessly complicated that even your own kind cannot sort the problems you create?"

"Good fucking question." I snort. "If only we all had a Taguel's sense of pragmatism."

"If only." Panne's lip curls in the barest hint of a smirk, before Maribelle's voice spikes again and she flinches in pain. "Gah! Enough of this. My ears are tortured enough by the usual incessant babbling around here, without having to deal with such noise."

"I'm surprised you lasted this long." I reply, stepping out of the doorway so she can make her escape.

"I was eating." Panne replies flatly. "Inform Stahl that today's endeavour was edible." She flees past me before I can respond.

"Well there's some good news at least." I roll my eyes and turn back to the disaster going on here. Maribelle is still oblivious to me, focused only on her prey and poor Virion. Virion has noticed me however, and is sending me desperate looks.

Tough it out buddy, I ain't going in blind. I head for the kitchen first, ignoring the look of horror on Virion's face.

"The fuck is going on this time?" I ask Stahl, who seems to be washing the dishes as loudly as he can in a futile attempt to drown out the noise.

"Oh!" Stahl whirls around. "Ben, you're here! Didn't Noire tell you?"

"Noire seems to have noticed my waning tolerance for this bullshit." I grumble. "She just said: 'Fight's happening in the Dining Room,' and rushed off. So how the fuck did this start?"

"I don't know!" Stahl yells in despair. "I doubt they even know! You know better than anyone how short Maribelle's fuse has been lately, and with Ricken egging her on… I don't know what he's thinking, but I swear he made it ten times worse!"

"I'm starting to think I need to sit that kid down and have words with him." I growl. "Alright, I'm going to go save Virion. Wish me luck."

"Good luck." Stahl says weakly. He's a lot like me, in that he's not much for loud, angry confrontations. Unfortunately I keep getting dragged into them since it was my sorry ass that got Gaius recruited in this timeline. No good deed goes unpunished, I guess.

I walk back out of the kitchen and stare blankly at the argument as it continues. By now everyone else in the dining hall has left, not wanting to deal with the situation any longer. Only Virion, Maribelle, Ricken, and Gaius are still here, though most of the noise is coming from only one side of the argument. Virion is stammering and failing to be heard, and Gaius is just sitting looking like a kicked puppy.

"Milady, please, I am not saying your anger is groundless, but surely even you can agree that this has escalated entirely beyond what is merited by such a minor incident!" Virion protests feebly.

"There is nothing minor about this!" Maribelle stamps her foot indignantly. "I will not sit idly by while he continues to show such a lack of respect! I know better than anyone the problems that can occur when he gets it into his head that the class system which holds our society upright can simply be ignored!"

"Once a thief, always a thief!" Ricken pipes in. "How long before he gets bored of pies and takes it further?"

"Quite right, Ricken." Maribelle nods haughtily. "I've seen full well the damage that dastardly rogue is capable of! And I will not let it happen again!"

"It won't happen again! Honest!" Gaius protests feebly. "Look, Twinkles, I-"

"Failing to recognize my name," Maribelle cuts in coldly, "Is doing absolutely nothing to help your case."

Gaius' jaw closes with an audible click. His head drops despondently.

"You're lucky you weren't executed after what you did!" Ricken puffs his chest out and points a finger melodramatically. "The Shepherds are the heroes of Ylisse! A cowardly thief has no place joining!"

"Hey!" Gaius snaps in sudden anger. "I'm a lot of things, sure, but I ain't a coward! I'm not taking that from some snot nosed kid too small for his damn hat."

"I'm not a kid! I'm a full-fledged Shepherd, and I have more right to be here than you do!" Ricken stamps his foot angrily.

"Everyone, please! This is getting entirely out of hand!" Virion cries out desperately, making eye contact with me with an absolutely frantic expression.

"It's been out of hand for quite a while already, I'd say." I reply, finally finding a chance to cut in. "Now. Does somebody want to tell me what the fuck is going on here?"

"Ben!" Maribelle gasps as she and Ricken whirl around in surprise. "I had not seen you enter!"

"Yes, well, you were rather preoccupied driving the rest of the Shepherds out of the dining hall." I gesture to the rest of the room irritably. "Now then, you know it's become my job to sort out any problems with our newest recruit," I take note of the way Ricken's face in particular twists at that as I continue, "So why don't you tell me what started all this."

Maribelle seems to remember herself as she takes in the rest of the room, now empty save for the five of us, and a hastily retreating Stahl. "I… hadn't realized." She says in a quiet voice. "Oh dear."

"Don't get upset with Twi- with Maribelle, okay?" Gaius says wearily. "It was my fault, I made a stupid comment and it upset her."

"I do not require you to defend me!" Maribelle snaps. "Indeed, I would much rather you cease such interactions with me completely. If you were to have the good grace to remove yourself from the room such incidents as this would cease entirely!"

"Maribelle." I growl in irritation. "You are a hell of a lot more responsible for this mess than he is, regardless of what he says. Only one person was disturbing the rest of the Shepherds when I got here, and it wasn't Gaius."

Maribelle blinks in surprise at that, but before I can continue Ricken interrupts me. "You're taking his side over ours? He's a thief, he shouldn't have been allowed to join the Shepherds in the first place! We should be throwing him in a cell, not defending him!"

"Ricken, shut up." I snap at him. "We'll discuss your behavior later. Right now I'm talking to Maribelle."

"You can't just tell me to shut up! I'm… I'm your teacher, I outrank you!"

"I'm more than ten years older than you and we haven't had a writing lesson in months, kid." I roll my eyes. I realize my mistake a moment too late and cringe in advance at the headache I'm bringing on myself.

"Don't call me a kid! I'm not a child, I'm a Shepherd and a grown up!" He protests hotly, stamping his foot and glaring up at me. I rapidly feel my already strained patience begin to slip away.

"That's twice you've spoken up after I specifically told you to wait your turn Ricken!" I say loudly, my voice just barely falling short of a yell. "Do not push me! I don't want to get Chrom involved in this stupid squabble, but if that's what I have to do to get some fucking respect from you, then you damn well better believe I'll do it!"

Ricken's jaw tightens as he glares up at me resentfully. Fine. Let the brat sulk. As long as he isn't running his mouth anymore I will be just fine with that. With his silence finally obtained I turn back to the others.

"Alright, so let's get this clear, first of all. Whether or not Gaius remains in the Shepherds is not even slightly a matter of debate. He's here, and he's staying here, until Chrom says otherwise. That is the way it works for everyone else in the Shepherds and it's not going to change just because Gaius has a shady past. Don't know why the fuck you're all talking at me like I have the power to kick him out.

"Secondly, there is no excuse for letting an argument grow to this extent. You're goddamn lucky Sumia isn't here today or she'd have your heads for this, and you know it. She's given people hell for less. I appreciate that you have some bad blood with Gaius Maribelle, but that doesn't excuse this degree of shit show. Show some professional courtesy to those around you, and deal with it quietly. When you snap like this it hurts more than just Gaius."

Maribelle grimaces, but doesn't refute the statement. Ricken glares at me like he wants to say something, but doesn't risk it for fear of my threat to get Chrom involved. I give him a warning look, and he turns aside to pout.

"Now then, Maribelle. Do you want to tell me why you blew up like this in the first place? I want to hear it from you, not Gaius."

Maribelle opens her mouth to speak then frowns, deep in thought. "I confess, after being so very wrapped up in the heat of the moment what was originally said has rather slipped my mind." She admits reluctantly.

"If you can't remember, then this argument may as well have been over nothing." I throw my hands up in frustration. "If you're going to make such a big goddamn deal over this then I'd hope you at least had the decency to remember why you were arguing in the first place."

"Clearly you have never been the recipient of a scorned woman's wrath." Virion mutters. I send him a frustrated look and he smiles apologetically.

"It wasn't the words that bothered me so much as it was the attitude expressed behind them." Maribelle replies. "Hearing him speak of the noble class with such an irreverent tone…"

"Maribelle, I know here at the castle you get shown a lot of respect, but damn near everywhere else in Ylisse most people don't give a rat's ass about nobility. It's pretty goddamn irrelevant once you've left the capital."

"Well most people don't go stealing from the royal treasury!" Maribelle snaps. "Nor do they attempt to frame my father for such a deed!"

Virion's and Ricken's eyes widen in shock. Mine do as well a brief moment later, once I remember the news is supposed to be surprising. Gaius simply hangs his head in shame beside me.

Okay, so how the fuck do I play this one?

I wasn't expecting Maribelle to out Gaius so easily. She's made it clear there was bad blood between the two of them, but I didn't expect her to be forthcoming with the details. No doubt the incident was something of a black mark on her family's honored history, even if the charges wouldn't have stuck.

Maribelle and the others are looking at me expectantly, so I turn to Gaius. "Can I assume from your silence and your expression that she's telling the truth?"

Gaius nods shakily. I let out a long sigh. Then turn to Maribelle. "Well. I'm sorry to hear that happened to you. It must have been horrible for you."

"It was… the most difficult time of my life." Maribelle replies shakily, her anger seeming to give way to the fearful memories she had of that time. "I thought I would lose him."

"I see." I nod in understanding. "I understand why you're upset at Gaius, Maribelle." She nods gratefully, but I hold up a hand to stop her before she can reply. "But that doesn't change the current situation."

"I beg your pardon!?" Maribelle gasps in surprise. "Are you seriously suggesting-"

"I'm telling you that your grudge, justified though it may be, has no real bearing upon the current situation." I nod. "There's no doubt that you have reason to be upset with him, but by your own admission this fight started over a statement so innocuous that you've already forgotten it. It seems clear to me that you're letting your previous experience color how you see him now."

"After everything I've just told you, you're still sticking up for him! I thought you better than to consort with liars and thieves, but clearly I was sorely mistaken!" Maribelle glares up at me.

"Of course I'm sticking up for him." I stare blankly down at Maribelle. "He's a fucking hero."

Gaius' head snaps up in shock. "I'm what now?"

"Gaius, I cannot count the number of lives you saved when you stepped up to help me the night you joined the Shepherds. You turned on your employers, putting your life at risk, and openly confessed to your crimes despite knowing that you'd likely suffer severe punishment for it. That takes a hell of a lot of courage and I have nothing but respect towards you for that."

"…Shit, Chuckles." Gaius lets out a croaking laugh and shakes his head. "When you put it like that I almost believe it myself."

"Well I don't believe it for a minute." Maribelle snaps. "A leopard cannot change its spots. Shame on you for letting yourself be swayed so easily by such flimsy lies!"

"Maribelle, were it not for Gaius the library would have burned that night." I look over at her calmly. "That's not a lie. That is a fact. It's something I watched him prevent."

"He was probably just doing it to trick you into speaking up for him!" Ricken bursts out angrily. "He's got it easy now, living in our barracks, eating our food, all because he fooled you!"

"Oh, then should I assume you're in on this little scheme?" I turn towards Ricken with a snarl, patience with the boy now strained to the verge of breaking. "Because the library was only put in danger because you ditched Miriel to go play hero. I know for a fact that Chrom talked to you about that little stunt."

"I was doing my duty to the Exalt by warning them of the danger!" Ricken protests, as though I didn't hear straight from Miriel and Chrom directly the trouble he caused.

Okay.

That's the last straw you little shit.

"YOU PUT INNOCENT LIVES AT RISK TO GO GLORY-SEEKING!" I bellow at him, cutting off his words. "If the weight of that colossal fuckup hasn't sunk in for you yet, then maybe I'll have to go talk to Chrom after all! Maybe I'll have to tell him that you're not ready to be a Shepherd yet. This group exists to help the people of Ylisse, and that does not include propping your family name up so you can be a big shot in the court!" I gesture back to Gaius as I continue. "He was far more a Shepherd than you were that night! And I think you know it. That's why you're so eager to get him out; you can't handle the thought of somebody you think of as just a criminal stepping up to clean up your fucking mess!"

"THAT'S NOT TRUE!" Ricken screams. "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING, YOU BASTARD!" Then he bursts into tears and rushes out of the room.

Not the reaction I was expecting…

Though… what the fuck was I expecting?

"Ben, my friend, I understand why you were upset, but I believe you may have taken things a bit too far." Virion says quietly. "Ricken is inexperienced, but not callous. The boy is simply… young."

"…Fuck." I groan as Virion's words sink in. I just bullied a fourteen year old boy until I made him cry. What the fuck is wrong with me? "He's not the only one. I thought I'd outgrown losing my temper like that. Well, off the battlefield, at least."

"You've had a trying week. More so than most of us." Virion says, placing a supportive hand on my shoulder. "Believe me when I say that I long for but a fraction of your patience. Were I in your shoes, I'd have reached my limit long ago."

"Well, it seems that we are all at our wits end with this conversation." Maribelle sighs in defeat, rubbing her forehead in an uncharacteristic display of weakness. "I think it would be in the best interest of everyone involved if we postpone this discussion here for now. Clearly nothing productive has come of the matter."

"What sort of positive result could ever have come from this?" I throw my hands up in the air in exasperation. "Maribelle, this isn't going to be a productive conversation no matter how many times we revisit it. I'd just as soon end it now, once and for all!"

"Then what would you suggest?" Maribelle groans angrily, clearly as exhausted as I feel now.

"That you put it aside! Act professionally about it. Just because you have reason to hate a fellow Shepherd doesn't mean you have to stew on it, and it definitely doesn't mean you should drag the other Shepherds into the situation. Look at Vaike and I, we've hated each other's guts since the day I joined and we managed to stop being disruptive assholes about it ages ago!"

"This is an entirely different degree of issue from your petty squabble with Vaike and you know it!" Maribelle hisses. "My grievances with Gaius are not based in some insensitive insult. He nearly tore my family apart!"

"I'm sorry!" Gaius bursts out desperately. "Twinkles I know I did wrong by you, and if I could take it all back I swear to you I would. Naga strike me down if I'm lying."

Maribelle stares disdainfully down at Gaius, expression as cold as I've ever seen it. "I know better than any what your word is worth, criminal. An apology means nothing from a liar like yourself."

"I'm a changed man!" Gaius bows his head. "I owned up to my actions a week ago, didn't I?"

"I'm not as easily convinced as Chrom or Ben." Maribelle sniffs. "For all I know, Ricken could be correct, and your actions could simply be a ploy to gain free room and board."

"Bit risky of a ploy there." I roll my eyes. "If there's one thing Ricken was right about, it's that Gaius really could have been executed for what he did."

"Then he's a reckless, foolish liar." Maribelle shakes her head. "He'll make you all regret vouching for him, I guarantee it."

"He's one of us, Maribelle." I say frankly. "You're going to have to get used to working with him."

"I will do no such thing!" Maribelle scoffs. "He is a criminal, and he will never have my trust."

"Actually, you won't have much choice in the matter." Another voice calls out, drawing everyone's attention. It's Robin, stalking towards us all as he scribbles away at his notebook. "I've just received approval from Chrom and Frederick. Until further notice Gaius is being assigned to the back lines. He'll be guarding our healers and mages."

"Uhh, you sure about that call, Bubbles?" Gaius looks over uneasily. "You know I'm really more of the sneaky, infiltration type, right?"

"I'm well aware of where your strengths lie, believe me." Robin smirks, flipping through his notebook and proudly displaying several pages packed with information on Gaius' abilities. "I look forward to making the most of your impressive skill set. But I won't be able to do that until this nonsense is settled."

Maribelle gapes at Robin. "Robin, you aren't seriously putting my life in the hands of this… this criminal, are you?"

"I am." Robin gives Maribelle a level stare. "I see no reason not to. From what I've heard Gaius did a fine job protecting Lissa during the invasion. And what's more, the sooner you learn to trust him, the sooner these damnable arguments can finally be brought to a close."

"How dare you!" Maribelle snaps. "I refuse to work under these circumstances. I wouldn't trust him to protect anything save for his own sorry self!"

"Then you will learn." Robin replies. "I meant what I said. Chrom and Frederick have approved this. It took some time, but I managed to impress upon Frederick the importance of dealing with this feud before it became more serious down the line. Chrom, of course, thought it was a brilliant idea from the start."

"Of course he did." Maribelle and I say in unison. Me in bemusement, her in frustration.

"Okay, I want things peaceful as much as anybody, but I'm not looking to step on any toes here." Gaius scratches at the back of his neck awkwardly. "If Twi-Maribelle!" He hastily amends at her glare. "If Maribelle isn't comfortable with me around, I'm fine keeping my distance."

"That isn't how we do things around here." Robin shakes his head. "Gaius, The Shepherds are trained to be the most elite fighting force in all of Archanea, and a big part of what makes that possible is cohesion. We are able to do the things we do not only because we are better trained and equipped than any other force our size, but because we work together better as well. You can't be excluded from that if we're going to stay strong in the war ahead. And honestly, I don't believe you deserve to be."

"You too, Robin?" Maribelle stares in horrified disbelief. "Why? Why is it that all of you are so determined to count this man over me, after everything he's done to me? To my family? Is-" She falls to her knees, bursting into tears. "Am I worth so little to you all? Is my pain such a tiny thing in your eyes?"

Oh god, we fucked up! Abort mission! System error!

"Uh!" I blink in horror, trading gazes with Gaius and Robin that are every bit as shocked. I stare desperately at Robin, trying to convey some sort of meaning with my eyes as Maribelle cries her heart out in front of us.

'What the fuck do we do?' I blink at him in bewilderment.

'Don't look at me, I literally have less than a year of experience with people, remember?' his wide eyes convey back.

'You're the one who turned this into a military edict, take responsibility!'

'You're the one who convinced Chrom to hire Gaius!'

'Do you have any idea how sick I am of hearing that?'

'Well it's true!'

By this point the two of us are having the quietest scuffle of my life, with thrown elbows and muffled grunts galore. The whole while we're openly glaring at each other.

"Gentlemen, this is hardly helpful behavior." Virion chides as he kneels down beside Maribelle and produces a silk handkerchief from his pocket. "Come now, my dear, dry those tears. It was never the intention of any of us to bring you such distress. I give you my word on that."

"I- I'm sorry, this is so disgraceful of me!" Maribelle sobs, frantically dabbing at her eyes. "I just feel so unsafe around him, after all that he's done. And people keep insisting that he's trustworthy in spite of it, and Lissa hasn't spoken to me all day! I can't help but feel so very overwhelmed by it all!"

"You have nothing to apologize for." I drop to one knee in front of her at Virion's gestured urging. "This isn't your fault. I… think you're right, to say I haven't been taking your fears seriously enough. Even if I don't necessarily agree with your opinion, I know you have good reason to feel the way you do. And I should be giving those reasons the proper attention they deserve. I'm truly sorry for being such an insensitive asshat."

"Me too." Robin grimaces. "I swear, I was only trying to help. I'm sorry for trying to force the issue. I think Gaius was right to say we should let you two stay separate for now. I'll talk to Chrom and tell him it was a stupid idea right away. Sorry Gaius."

"Hey, I appreciate the thought, Bubbles." Gaius says, shifting uncomfortably. "I just… it was a really horrible thing I did to her and her dad. I've got no illusions about that. And I don't want to make her life any tougher than I have already. So if she wants me to keep my distance then I've got no right to argue."

"Okay." I sigh, turning back to Maribelle, still fighting to regain her composure. "It's settled then. We'll let you and Gaius have plenty of time and space, okay? I'm sorry again."

"I appreciate your understanding." Maribelle sniffs one last time, before allowing Virion to help her back to her feet. "And… I suppose I owe you an apology as well, Ben. You've worked hard the last several days to keep the Shepherds on good terms after all that's happened, and I know I've made that difficult for you… perhaps more difficult than was merited."

"Like I said, I don't blame you in the slightest." I nod to her. "You had every reason to be upset."

"Perhaps, but I have hardly been showing the most respect to my peers in expressing my discomforts." Maribelle dusts her skirts off and hands Virion back his handkerchief. "My gratitude, Virion. Now then, I can see that you are willing to take my fears seriously, contrary to my earlier concern. As a proper lady of the nobility, it seems only right for me to display a similar courtesy in return."

"Uhh… what do you mean by that?" I blink in confusion.

"I mean to say that as you have shown serious consideration to my misgivings, it is only right for me to give a proper sense of consideration to the trust you have expressed."

I try not to let my jaw drop at this. That was a quick turnaround! Could it be that we've gotten through to her? No, not a chance. More likely she's just decided that she's as fed up with the arguing as I am and wants nothing to do with this bullshit anymore.

"Wait…" Gaius looks to Maribelle in disbelief, "Are you saying-"

"I shall stop you there before you get the wrong idea." Maribelle gives Gaius a cold glance that goes a long way toward confirming my suspicions. "Let me be clear, I still do not trust you myself in any way. Nor do I in any way intend to start. But I am willing to at least acknowledge that you have earned the trust of several good friends of mine, and as such will endeavour to… tolerate you."

Tolerate. That's… something, I suppose. I dunno, it doesn't really say much to me, but Gaius looks like he's just won the lottery.

"I can work with that!" He says eagerly. He makes as if to shake her hand before clearly thinking better of it and stepping back further. "I promise you, I won't make you regret it!"

"See that you do not, lest I bring my parasol to bear on you." Maribelle sniffs. "Now then, I do believe we can consider this matter closed for the time being. Thank you for your time gentlemen. I bid you good day."

"Right! Thanks everyone." Gaius gives us a cheery wave. "That's a real load off my mind." He practically skips out of the dining hall. Maribelle makes her own way out at a more sedate pace once he's completely vanished from sight, no doubt unwilling to actually leave with him.

This leaves Robin, Virion, and myself to slowly sink into chairs and stare blankly at the ceiling.

"What the fuck, guys?" I groan. "That was so much more painful than it should have been."

"Agreed." Robin shakes his head slowly. "I know my head's pretty empty right now, but I still feel like that was one experience I'd like to go… wherever the rest of my memories went."

"Such is the way of life, I'm afraid." Virion smiles wistfully. "A woman's wrath is a wild and tempestuous thing, never to be underestimated."

"Yeah, won't be making that mistake again any time soon." I chuckle. "As long as we don't count a certain temperamental daughter of mine. I do something to piss her off daily."

"No I think that counts."

"Fuck off, Robin."

The three of us chuckle at that, then fall into a companionable silence, still leaning back in our chairs and gazing to the heavens.

Then Robin breaks the silence. "If Maribelle's wrath is a tempest, does that mean we're hiding in the eye of the storm right now?"

I blink, then share a look with Virion. He grimaces. "It is… a distinct possibility."

"Shit." I frown. Then shake my head. "You know what, I don't want to fucking think about that right now. Let's go to your room, Virion. You can kick our ass in that strategy game of yours for a while and we can just forget about this debacle."

"Speak for yourself, I was this close to beating him last time." Robin grins enthusiastically, hopping to his feet.

"Close means nothing when in the end, I have still managed to shame you, my friend."

"Just wait Virion, I'll have you eating those words before the day is over!"


"Dad."

"What's up kiddo?"

"I have a question for you."

"Shoot."

"Why has Ricken been glaring at you since we started breakfast?"

I sigh, turning away from my plate to look across the dining hall. Sure enough, the youngest of the Shepherds is giving me a look like I stepped on a puppy. Which is somewhat appropriate, since the mental comparison has been made by myself on multiple occasions, usually when he's following Chrom around. When the kid notices me looking in his direction, his glare intensifies, eyes focused only on me as he struggles to stab at his bacon. You'd think a night's rest would have let the kid cool off.

"God dammit." I sigh and turn back to Severa. "How long has he been looking at me like that?"

"I told you, as soon as we sat down to eat." Severa gives me a very unimpressed look. "What did you do?"

"Scolded him." I mutter. Severa's gaze lingers and I roll my eyes. "Scolded him a bit too enthusiastically. In my defense he was being a shit."

"Aren't you like, twice his age?"

"Fuck!" I blink in horror. "I nearly am, aren't I? Good lord, that's… I'm so fucking old!"

"Dad." Severa stares blankly at me.

"Sorry, sorry, I just- ugh. That's a seriously painful revelation."

"Dad."

"Don't you 'Dad' me, kiddo. You'll understand once you're my age."

She glares at me and I resist the urge to sigh. "Alright Severa, I'm listening."

"Why are you picking a fight with somebody half your age?" She accuses.

Okay, ouch. "I didn't pick a fight with anybody. In case you haven't noticed, your dad has been doing nothing but breaking up fights for the past week."

"Last I checked breaking up fights doesn't mean starting new ones." Severa rolls her eyes.

"Touché." I grin as I spear a cherry tomato with my fork. "In all seriousness, I'm aware that the Ricken situation is a problem. Not the least of which because the kid's never gonna eat enough if he keeps glaring at me like that." Severa lets out a snort of laughter at that, then gives me the usual look promising death if I comment on it. I send her a cheeky smirk as I chew my tomato, then continue. "Anyways, I definitely went too far in how I told him off. I realized as much as soon as I'd finished saying what I did."

"So apologize and get him to stop that already." Severa grumbles. "The glaring is already getting annoying."

"Nah." Severa blinks in surprise at me, and I shrug. "I don't feel like it. It's true I got carried away yelling at him. But it's also true he worked his ass off to get me to that point. Fact is, the kid's needed an attitude adjustment for a while now. And if I apologize while he's got that attitude about him he'll just go on thinking the way he's been acting has been correct."

"Sounds like you're just being stubborn."

"Oh that's definitely part of it." I shrug again. "But only part. If it makes you feel better I'm going to talk to Frederick later and fill him in."

"As long as somebody's telling you off for being an idiot."

I grin back at her, about to reply, when I spot a glimpse of blue out of the corner of my eye. Chrom and Frederick are making their first appearance in the barracks since the attack. "Hey, been a while since he's been able to drop in." My smile broadens as I call out across the hall. "Morning Chrom, finally decided to grace us with your presence?"

"From what I've heard, you and Robin have been taking care of things here just fine without us." Chrom gives me a weary grin. "Thank you for that, by the way." I tactfully ignore the annoyed looks some of the other Shepherds give me at that and nod gratefully. Maybe I didn't do a perfect job, but I worked my ass off trying to keep the peace and won't say no to some appreciation.

"Thank Virion, if it wasn't for him Maribelle would have killed both of us by now." Robin replies from the next table over, prompting a chorus of laughter from around the room. Curiously not laughing is Maribelle, who gives me a considering look as she sips her tea.

…That one can be quite terrifying when she wants to be.

"At any rate," Chrom continues, oblivious to the chills running up my spine, "I'm pleased, extraordinarily pleased in fact, to say that a reprieve from my house arrest will be arriving shortly!" The room gives a loud cheer at that, and he can't help but chuckle. "It really has been too long, yes. The Shepherds have two important jobs to do in the coming months. Our first task will be to act as escort to my sister and several other nobles; the Exalt shall be travelling to the Eastern Palace, where she will be farther from the war, and farther from King Gangrel's claws."

"About time, too." Severa mutters as everyone cheers at the declaration. "Last thing I want is to stop another stupid assassination."

I feel a weight settle in my gut at the words. Chrom carries on, talking about the trip everyone will be making to Regna Ferox once Emmeryn's been moved, but I don't pay much attention at that point.

It's something I've been putting off thinking about. The fact is, now that the assassination has been successfully prevented, I am completely on my own here. The only one who knows what's coming next is… me. Well, that and everyone else who's played Fire Emblem in my home world, but they don't really count, do they? The future kids knew what was happening until now, but the future they were trying to stop is already off the rails.

From now on, only I know where events may lead. And that means some tough choices ahead. Things are going to get worse before they get better here, and I may have the chance to stop that. I failed to do so when Cordelia left, partly because I was caught up in how miserable her situation had become, and partly because I didn't really have much time to think about it. If I'd prepared though, could I have done something already? Could I have saved the lives of Cordelia's fellow knights?

Can I do something for Emmeryn?

Is it right to do something?

That seems like an absurd question at first; my initial thought is that I should do anything I can to help Emmeryn if I can, but the more I think on it the more I find myself doubtful. As much as I don't want Emmeryn to die, there is no denying that Emmeryn's martyrdom is critical to how things work out in the game. Her sacrifice supposedly ends the war years ahead of the previous timeline. The way Emmeryn dies is the catalyst for success against Grima. She makes the Plegian war end quickly, which makes the Valm war go smoother, which makes the next Plegian war easier as well.

The warning Severa gave me from my future self comes to mind. If I tamper with things I could ruin everything. It's reckless, more than anything. I know the road that leads to success. I know that if things move along the route they're heading it could mean saving the world from destruction. It would be stupid to change things. Sure, there have been things that don't play out the way I expected them to, but ultimately the broader scope of events have played out exactly as I expected. Future children showed up sooner, and Deadlords are roaming about, but still my knowledge holds true. A few minute details aren't enough for me to make the conclusion that it's safe to fuck with the timeline. Not yet, at any rate.

If only there was a way for Emmeryn to martyr herself without dying... Unfortunately the death part is something of a prerequisite.

I'll have to think on it. Not the least of which because my conscience won't let me rest otherwise. If there's a way to save Emmeryn's life I'd happily take it, but not if it saps her sacrifice of its potency. There's far too much to lose if I get overeager.

A hand waves in my face, startling me from my thoughts. I look up and see Severa glaring at me. "Everything alright there, kiddo?"

"You tell me. You've been staring off into space like a moron for a while."

I blink, looking around and seeing that the room's considerably emptier than when I was last paying attention, with more than half of the Shepherds now missing. "Huh. So I have. Where'd everyone go?"

"Are you seriously that oblivious?" Severa rolls her eyes. "They're getting ready for a patrol. There have been Risen acting up since we've been stuck here for so long, so Chrom wanted to head out today and clear up as much as he could before we left."

"Bit of a rush, huh?"

"We leave in two days." Severa stares flatly at me. "Gawds, did you listen to anything?"

"Not after he brought up the Eastern Palace." I frown.

"Is it too late to get somebody with some sense to adopt me?" Severa asks loudly so that everyone still in the room can hear. "I think this one's broken."

"That would certainly explain how our first meeting went." Gaius chuckles as he walks past.

"After all I've done for you!" I gasp in mock-offense.

"I'm just saying what everyone else is thinking, Chuckles!" Gaius shoots me a grin. "Even I think you were crazy to hire me."

"Hear-hear!" A scattered chorus goes up around the room, and I sink into my seat grumpily.

Despite my best efforts to take the ribbing in stride, I still find myself eating and leaving the room rather quickly after that. I don't take well to being the subject of a joke, something anyone who was present for the start of my feud with Vaike can attest to. Severa remains, being both unaware of my discomfort and averse to the crutches she's stuck using to get around at the moment. When she goes somewhere she sticks around as long as she can get away with.

Despite this, I rapidly find I'm not alone when I leave.

"Ben, just the man I wanted to see!"

I blink at the voice, and turn to stare flatly at my follower. "Anna, that line doesn't work if you chase me out of a room to say it."

"Hush, you." Anna waves at me impatiently. "I'm not really concerned with a sales pitch at the moment, okay? I've got something important to talk to you about."

I stare blankly at her for a moment. "What, you're finally pulling through on the whole gate thing? I thought you fucking forgot about that, honestly."

"I thought you did." Anna gives me a flat look. "All that talk you gave me about wanting to go see your family, and then you adopt that kid. It's like you're trying to give yourself a headache."

"I guess I'm just a masochist." I roll my eyes.

Anna frowns at that, and I'm mildly surprised to see what looks like genuine concern in her eyes. "Seriously big guy, what's the deal with that? I signed up to help you here, and I don't intend to go back on my promise. I said I'd try to help you get home, and I meant it. So if you're giving up on that…"

"I'm not." I shake my head instinctively, before pausing to think about her words. "At least… I don't think I am. Look, you want to know why I adopted Severa? It's simple. I love her. She my kid and I would die to protect her. That doesn't mean I don't want to see my family anymore, I haven't stopped caring about them, but it doesn't change what's going on here. Despite my best efforts I can't just turn my emotions off and ignore how I feel about what's happened to me since I came here."

"Ugh. Love." Anna makes a face. "Never done anyone the slightest bit of good. The stories my family could tell you about what those kinds of attachments get you, hoo boy."

"I've heard enough about your family to know it's as twisted as they come." I reply coolly.

Before I can blink Anna has me by the collar and has dragged my face down to her level, expression cold as she looks me in the eye. "I'm going to warn you one time, Ben. Do not. Insult. My. Family. I told you before that there is nothing in this world that matters to me more and I meant it."

I manage to keep a straight face only because my mind has gone blank from fear. "Fair enough, I went too far! I apologize."

Anna stares at me another moment, then releases me. "Apology accepted. Just don't let it happen again." She watches as I straighten my clothing back out, then comments with a smirk. "You know your voice gets higher pitched when you're trying not to panic."

"I'll have to work on that." I grumble. "You know that's exactly the kind of love I was referring to, right? That whole, 'don't mess with my family or I'll fuck you up' thing you just did?"

Anna thinks on that for a moment. "I suppose so!" She says brightly. "Usually when the L word gets thrown around in my family it's because of a bad breakup. Our family has a long history of good looks and sharp minds, so we have little trouble starting relationships, but very few of the people we end up involved with actually have what it takes to stick around."

"It does seem pretty cutthroat with your family." I nod in agreement. Anna sends me a sharp look and I throw my hands up in surrender. "Observation, not a judgement!"

"Better not be, mister!" Anna replies, laughter in her voice. Clearly she enjoys intimidating people. A dangerous woman by all accounts. "Anyways, let's get back on topic here. I've been meaning to give you an update for a while, but since you adopted a kid last week I wanted to ask first if you're still looking for info on the Gate."

"I am." I nod in affirmation. "Like I said, I've still got family and friends back there."

"Right." Anna sighs. "A shame, it would have made my life easier if you'd changed your mind."

"How so?" I give her a curious look.

"Let's just say it's looking like your situation is going to be much more of a headache for me and my family than I first expected." Anna frowns. "Those of us at the top of the ladder, the ones with the most knowledge on the gate, have been arguing non-stop about what to do about your situation. The Outrealm thing is a closely guarded secret, so having somebody show up who just… knows all this stuff about it has them all losing their heads."

"So they've just been arguing about it for months?"

"Of course!" Anna nods vehemently. "This is a secret that my family has been successfully keeping from the rest of the world for centuries! I told you before, knowledge is power, and this is some of the most powerful knowledge out there! Heck, some of my cousins were saying we should just kill you!"

"Come again?" I stare at her in shock.

Anna waves a hand dismissively. "That idea was shelved weeks ago, don't worry. Too much trouble for little to no gain, and not just because you're friends with a prince. General consensus is that people want to learn as much as we can about you, but also that nobody wants to risk you learning our secrets. So it's pretty much a big stalemate over that."

"You know, when you said you had an update I was hoping to hear you were figuring out how to help me. Not… being bureaucratic about it."

"You don't get as powerful as my family is without being bureaucratic." Anna shrugs.

Guess I'll never be truly powerful then. I hate bureaucracy with a passion. But telling Anna I hate everything her family stands for might constitute an insult, so I keep my thoughts silent on that one.

"Alright, well if it helps…" I push my thoughts back on topic as I mull things over. "I have zero intention of leaving before this war ends. If I'm going to pay a visit back home, then it's going to be at a time when my absence has less chance of fucking everyone over."

"Good to know there's no rush, I suppose." Anna frowns thoughtfully. "Nice to know you're confident about surviving this thing, too."

"I wouldn't say confident, per se." I shrug. "With the whole trauma thing I've got going on I'm still probably one of the weaker Shepherds. But I've lived through enough that I'm starting to like my chances."

"Oh yeah, like that story they're talking about in the slums?" Anna nods in understanding. "Is that the same mess that had everyone fussing about you when I first joined?"

"Some details of the story have been… embellished." I grumble, not particularly caring for another reminder of that fucking mess.

"That does tend to be the case with these things, doesn't it?" Anna nods along. "If it makes you feel better, it's only really spreading among the really low class parts of town. Criminals, vagrants, people like that. It doesn't really stick with most honest folks. Nobody wants to believe their ruler is hiring a mass murderer, right?"

"I don't know." I drawl. "Plegia doesn't seem to give a shit."

"Very true!" Anna chuckles along. "Alright! I'm going to head into town now. Gotta pass what you said on to the family. And check market prices out east. Wasn't expecting such a sudden trip, but I'm sure I can arrange a few deals before we leave! It should make for a good challenge! Take care!"

"You too." I nod as Anna heads for the door. After another moments thought I decide I should stop her again. "Anna." I call out, catching her just before she makes it outside. "It did make me feel better, hearing that. So… thanks." I scratch at my neck awkwardly.

Anna beams at me. "Glad to hear it, big guy!" She makes to leave again, before pausing in thought. "Hey, you know just now you said you wanted to go home just to 'visit', right?"

I blink in surprise. "Uhh, did I?"

"Figured you'd missed that." Anna smirks at me. "Anyways, thought I should mention that to you, in case you hadn't noticed. It's almost like you're having second thoughts about leaving, huh? Something to consider. Anyways, bye now!" She vanishes out the door with a cheery wave.

I stare blankly at the door. "Figures she'd take the time to give me one last headache before finishing the conversation." I shake my head irritably. "That one is nothing but trouble."


I'll confess to being somewhat worried about certain aspects of this chapter. Emotional arguments are intimidating to write, and I'm sure some readers may be upset that this is how I chose to give Ricken a proper introduction. Apologies if this is the case, but I don't know that this would have ended up any other way. As a character Ricken's biggest personality trait is 'immature', so his first appearance was always going to be... problematic.

Next time, we get back into the action!

And here's the usual link to the discord. Come join if you're interested, it's a great server for fanfiction, writing tips, and just generally having a good time!
discord .gg/9XG3U7a