Ch. 7

Burke anxiously went through Mrs. Drake's folder once more. He was staring at that piece of paper so hard that one would have thought an answer would jump out from it.

Cristina knew it. That's why she was giving me that look.

Burke regretted showing a complete lack of compassion to Meredith earlier. She was honest, he was not.

Deep at heart, he knew what he had to do with the information, but he did not know how to deal with Cristina. Had he just blown his chance?

Preston Burke was never as conscious about the potential consequence of his action as he was at this point in life. As an attending and someone destined to be Chief of Surgery some day, he always got to do whatever he liked. In the realm of love, however, he was facing a completely different ranking system.

That night, he could barely sleep. Strange, he thought, how a woman's reaction to his past deed meant so much to him. The only other woman who had exerted such an influence on him would probably be his mother.

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While Burke genuinely enjoyed the company of his lawyer friends from college—he himself being an eloquent guy who craved intellectually stimulating conversations that could keep him sharp—he never liked the in-house lawyer.

"I've spoken to the husband. I believe as long as his wife remains stable, he's not gonna sue."

"I can't take your beliefs to court, Dr. Burke."

Burke was appalled that the lawyer wasn't taking his words seriously. He wasn't only trying to defend Meredith, but also to stand up for what was right. Cristina was never going to witness this, but he had to prove at least to himself that he was not burying his own conscience.

"Dr. Grey made a huge error."

"And she reported it."

"Too late. And in front of the patient's husband."

"But she reported it. She spoke up."

Burke stopped, biting his lower lip, clasping his hand, before speaking again. He was not hesitating, but scared. He was not sure if it was too late for him to confess, if he was saying it in front of the right people.

He had been making a lot of decisions in the past few days, taking very big steps. From letting Nurse Fallon help him to giving Cristina coffee, things seemed to be working well so far. All he needed was another leap of faith, that extra step that the Chief said he was lacking only two weeks ago.

"…Why didn't I report that? Maybe I was scared, fearing it would end my career… even great doctors make mistakes, and when we do, we gotta have the chance to speak up without fear of retribution." He glared at the glass surface of Webber's desk. "Or everyone suffers."

He couldn't express how refreshing it felt to finally say it out loud. The Chief let out a subtle smile and made a mental note of his attending's courage. It was never too late.

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