Dun, dun, dun! My first fic evah! The first chapter isn't the funniest one, but it was the one that started it all. Beware of randomness, weirdness, OOCness, and all that jazz. Meant solely for humor and writing practice/improvement. Dub names are used in this. Doesn't follow the timeline either.

Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever, own Yu-Gi-Oh GX or The Little Rascals. Or SNL. Or S.M.3. Or Seinfeld.

Ch.1: Holy Smokes!

"JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNN!"

Syrus's cry rang throughout the Slifer dorm. He ran around frantically, opening random doors, surprising the rooms' occupants, and causing an all-around brouhaha.

" I've looked almost everywhere! Where is he!"

(Now your all probably wonder why the poor guy's so flustered, right? I thought so. You see, another Academy's chancellor and his best students are visiting. And Sheppard planned a dinner, inviting Duel Academy's best, along with any of their friends. He didn't count on one of them being late. Why? That's not important. It just is, okay! You want to take this outside, T-t-turkey? Back to the story…. )

Syrus, who was now standing in front of Jaden's room (which happened to be the last place he suspected because it was just so obvious) thought to himself for a moment.

"Okay, if he's in there I'm going to spite myself. I'll cough, burp, sneeze, and fart at the same time!"

He opened the door….

And there stood Jaden who was using tongs to carefully place a large, moist, and ancient looking hot dog into a paper sack, which had grease leaking out of the bottom. The brunet looked up with a grin.

" Hey, Sy! What-"

" HACKBELLLCHOOSQUEEEE!"

Syrus collapsed. Jaden knelt down beside the twitching boy.

" You know the rule Sy. If you cough, burp, sneeze, and fart at the same time you'll die!"

" He already did it, slacker."

Jaden stood up.

" Hey, Chhhaazzzz!"

Chazz ignored him and nudged Syrus with his left foot.

" He still alive?"

" Sqqqeeeaallllll-hummmmmmmmmmmm!"

Chazz jumped back in surprise.

" What the heck was that?"

Syrus shot up.

" It was nothing! Eh, eh, eh!"

And ran out of the room waving his arms like a crazy person. Or an angry duck.

" I'm not crazy!"

Jaden waved.

" Seeya! Oh, and remind me to put that mustache on Alexis! Remember, women with mustaches are sexy! Or that's what Atticus says!"

Jaden seemed to have either forgotten Chazz was there or he wanted a death wish.

" WHAT?"

" You're still there? Ack! I didn't do anything! Never mind that Chazz!" Jaden replied hastily in response to the veins popping up on his friend's head.

" UUURRRAAAHHHHH!"

" You yell too much! Gotta go!"

In the dining room everyone waited quietly for the two missing boys.

"Where are Jaden and Chaaazzzz?" Sheppard bellowed, rattling the plates, forks, and everyone's teeth. He asked virtually everyone except for Syrus who happened to be fast asleep.

" What about you, Zane? Have you seen them?"

" No."

" Oh."

Zane did know whom to ask though. He turned to his right and gently shook Syrus.

" Hey, do-"

" Ba-a-a-a-a! Don't hurt me Mr. Lucky Charms! I didn't mean to go poopy in your litter box!"

"…?"

" Huh? Oh, sorry Zane! You just scared the SMEEBERS out of me. Eh, eh, eh!"

"…Never mind."

" Never mind wha-"

" Uuurrrrrrrrrrrraaaahhhhhhhhhh! I'll get you, you slacker!"

Running shamelessly into the room, Jaden and Chazz made complete circles around the table with their chase until they became too tuckered out to continue.

" I'll still get you once…I'm able…to..breath."

" Can I…write my will…first?"

They didn't notice the Chancellor standing behind them.

" Would you boys be so kind as to SIMMA DOWN NOOOW!"

They scrambled over to the table.

Muttering angrily, Chazz took his seat next to Jaden." This is all your fault."

A FEW UNIMPORTANT MINUTES LATER…

" I'm bored."

" You're always bored slacker."

" Hey, Chance, when's the food comin'?"

" I. Don't. Know."

" Oh. Hey, guys, I know something fun we can do!"

On the inside almost everyone was groaning.

" We can tell jokes!"

Chazz looked very annoyed at his words.

" I bet they'll be STUPID."

" Nuh-uh! I got plenty of good ones! Like this one. Okay, what do you get when you cross a rooster with peanut butter?"

Sighing inwardly, some offered a guess for the ludicrous joke. No one got it right.

" Nope. None of those."

" Well, what is it, Stupid?"

" A cock stuck in the roof of your mouth!"

Face-faults and grimaces galore.

" Nnnoooooooooooooo! Jaden! That's a vulgar joke!"

" Try a less gross one, Stupid"

Jaden grinned." Okay. Let's see…I know! How about this one: What do you say when supreme pizzas are falling from the sky?"

Same as last time.

" Man, you guys are dense!"

Silence.

" Anyways, you say…It's 'raining' supreme!" Guffawing, Jaden fell out of his chair despite the incredulous looks he was getting. Chazz had to punch him to make him stop.

" Oooowww. Was that really necessary Chazz?"

" Yam, yam, yam!"

" Why'd you 'yam'?"

" I grumbled!"

TWO MINUTES LATER….

Reaching over to the salsa chip in hand Jaden dipped it once, took a bite, and dipped again. Usually stuff like that is ignored but Chazz noticed.

" Hey, slacker."

" Yeah?"

" Did you just double-dip that chip?"

"Yup. Why?"

" You dipped it, took a bite, and dipped it again. It's like putting your whole mouth in the dip! Just dip it once and END IT."

Jaden put on a stubborn face.

" Look you dip your way.." He dipped and bit another chip." And I'll dip my way."

He reached to dip again but…

"Gimme that chip!" Chazz grabbed Jaden's arm. And they fought over it.

FOURTY-FIVE MINUTES AND TWELVE ARGUMENTS LATER…

The dinner was winding down and it was getting late. Everything should end normally, right? Cute thought,…BUT IT'S WRONG!

Jaden pulled the paper sack, which was still (somehow) steaming hot. He dumped the ancient hot dogs he got for no reason from Bastion, who had found them under his bed, onto his plate. They were bloated. He then enthusiastically grabbed a spork and slowly poked one with it.

WWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE….

The others stopped eating and grew silent.

WWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW.

" Awesome!" Jaden exclaimed gleefully. He stabbed it harder…

And it exploded in a melee of meat and grease.

People screamed in surprise. Some hid under the table (a smart move), some ran around in circles, and those who were (unfortunately) close to the explosion put their arms up in defense. Jaden somehow was unscathed and oblivious to the chaos around him. Stabbing the next hot dog only made things worse. It released a green gas which made whomever inhaled it go temporarily insane. Or they just passed out. What about Jaden you ask? He got a gas mask out of thin air. Why?

Anyway the brouhaha turned for the worst when Jaden jabbed the final dog. Instead of piercing the skin it launched it into the air where it sailed like a missile. A homing missile to be exact for it was heading straight for the other chancellor. Chumley (he covered his nose and mouth when the gas was released) tried to catch it and jumped on the table to get closer. Except his weight caused the table legs to splinter and break. Do you remember that there are still people under the table? Chumley flipped the table off of them but then it crushed people close by. So he flipped it again and again and again and again…(Let's move on.)

The other chancellor never saw the projectile coming.

BAM.

He fell on his back.

Silence.

And then he sat back up. Only he was missing something. Something important to him.

" Hey, where'd your hair go?" Jaden queried.

The man's eyes bugged out. He reached up tensely and gingerly touched his bald head.

"Agghhhhhhhh! My wig!"

Standing up in a huff the man ordered the sane portion of his students to assist the unconscious or temporarily insane ones out of the room.

" NNNNNNNNOOOOOO! Jjjadddennn! Dooo youuu realize what you've just done!"

Jaden looked around at the humongous mess around him, mouth agape.

" Wellll? What dooo youu have to saaayyyyy for yourrselllffff?"

Jaden looked up at Chancellor Sheppard.

" HOLY SMOKES!"

END).

(A/N: As said before this isn't the funniest one. It'll get a LOT better. Promise. I'm not that good at writing humor. Yet. My little brother came up with stuff for the later chapters but this chapter is all me. Constructive criticism and flames are welcome. Good reviews are nice. And to all the people who review that know me: PIDGE SAYS HI!