A/N: So, it's been a long time since I posted a chapter, but 2020 was nuts. Also, now my country is in chaos because of a domestic terrorist attack. :) On a positive note, this chapter is at least twice as long as an average chapter is for me.

No warnings this time except swearing cuz, y'know, Bakugou.

Dear Izuku, I'm sorry that I told you to dive off of UA's building-

Dear Izuku, I'm sorry for being an asshole to you the other day. Not that I'm not basically an asshole to you every day or anything. I know I never apologize for that shit, but that's just because I've never seen a need to, but Mr. Aizawa is making me write this-

Hey Izuku, I'm sorry for being a piece of shit-

Hey Deku-

Katsuki groans in frustration. His desk and the floor around him are littered with papers, crumpled drafts of an apology letter that refuses to be written. Nothing he writes feels sincere, and he wonders if it's because he's not really sorry. He has to write something though. If he doesn't have something by the time Aizawa shows up, he'll just be giving the man one more reason to be disappointed. One more thing to add to the list of "Reasons I Should Expel Katsuki Bakugou." He put off writing it last night, and now he's regretting that decision. He woke up that morning to his alarm, went for a run, and came home to his mother freaking out about cleaning the already clean house. That venture took a solid three hours. And now, he's spent a good hour trying to write one stupid apology letter and failing. Which means that time is running out.

"Katsuki! Your teacher's here!" Mitsuki shouts up the stairs, because of course the woman can't just come up to him like a normal parent. Also, why is Aizawa here? Isn't school still in session? Looking at the red numbers of his alarm clock proves him wrong. He heads downstairs. His apology letter still isn't done, but that's okay. He can just cop an attitude and say that he didn't feel like writing it. That'll be believable. Downstairs, Principal Nezu and Aizawa are both sitting at the table drinking tea, wincing at the bitter taste. Bakugou feels for them a little. No one likes his mother's tea. Across from them sit his mother and father. There's a space for him to sit next to his father, and he breathes a silent sigh of relief that he won't have to sit next to Mitsuki. After sitting, he looks at the adults in front of him. Their faces are serious, but calm which somehow calms him somewhat. He glances at his father, who looks solemn, then risks a glance at his mother. Her face is carefully put together with a small, tight smile. His teachers may be fooled, but Katsuki knows just how much rage is simmering behind her thinly pursed lips.

"If that's everyone, I think we should get started," Aizawa was the first to break the awkward silence.

"Good," Mitsuki agreed. "Let's start with exactly what my son did to get himself suspended, considering he refused to tell me yesterday." All eyes turned to the youngest Bakugou, who immediately slouched further in his seat, putting on a defensive posture like armor.

"I just," he cuts himself off. "All I did-" He's stuttering like fuckin' De- that shitnerd. "I said," he makes direct eye contact with Aizawa-sensei, "'Just pray you'll be born with a better quirk in your next life, and take a swan dive off the roof of the building,'" he recites. It's not as if he doesn't have the words memorized. It's not if he hasn't spread the words across his mind countless times, trying his best to make them explode.

He glances at Mitsuki and cocks his eyebrow, making sure to give her his smuggest look despite the twist in his stomach from the look in Aizawa-sensei's eyes. Even the giant rat looks momentarily disgusted with him and he didn't even think the thing was capable of that. The room is silent, air thickly congested. Bakugou takes another look at his teacher, and feels a deeper twist in his gut at the look of disappointment in his eyes. Nedzu is the first to make a noise, clearing his throat and running his eyes around the room to glance at everyone.

"As I'm sure all of you are aware," his voice is just as calm as usual. "No bullying of any kind is acceptable at UA. Furthermore, to say something so heartless to someone is beyond average name-calling and torment that young people are prone to engage in against each other. When Aizawa informed me of this during lunch today, I had in mind that the best course of action would be expulsion. Luckily for young Bakugou here, his teacher managed to convince me otherwise. We will decide upon other forms of punishment instead." His face turns up in a conniving smirk as he gazes at Katsuki steadily.

"Whatever, let's just get this over with already," Bakugou's sure if he rolls his eyes one more time they'll permanently sit gazing at the back of his head.

"I for one, would like an explanation," Mitsuki glares at her son. "Of how in the hell you thought your actions were appropriate. You owe me that much at least."

"I don't owe you shit, woman," Bakugou fills his voice with venom.

"I am your mother," comes her heated response. "You owe me everything, including your life." Bakugou feels sparks itching beneath his fingers. Somehow, it takes her no time at all to push him to the brink of an explosion. Rather than blow up the furniture around him, he opens his mouth and throws verbal grenades instead.

"No I don't!" Katsuki shouts. "I don't owe you anything! I don't owe anyone a goddamn thing!" He's breathing heavily, his shoulders heaving. He's also standing, for some reason. Masaru puts a steadying hand on his arm, but he jerks away. It hurts his father, he knows, but he can't find it in him to care. "If you all wanna expel me, or punish me or whatever, fine, but I refuse to defend myself to people who don't even give two shits about me."

Masaru starts to disagree with him, but he turns and stalks out of the house, grabbing his running shoes on his way out. Once outside, Katsuki pulls on his shoes, turns on music, and starts to run.

Inhale, thud thud thud thud exhale, thud thud thud thud. Katsuki's thoughts play on repeat, in time with the impact of his feet on the ground. It's like a song. A horrible song where the melody is jumbled, and the words make no sense. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Stupid Deku, stupid me, stupid busybodies, stupid fucking teachers who pretend that they care. Inhale. Stupid piece of shit mother who cares more about her image than her own son. Exhale. Stupid Deku. That shitnerd has too much damn energy and positivity. Inhale. Stupid fucking water flying off my face cuz I'm crying like a bitch. Exhale. Hands move up to quickly wipe his face. Inhale. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Stupid-

"Hey, Bakubro," a voice sounds behind him. He recognizes that it's Kirishima, but he doesn't stop. "Hey! Dude, wait up!" He runs faster. His plan of evading the spiky teen is dashed to pieces as Kirishima crashes into him from behind, moving over so that his arm is slung over his shoulders and they are walking side by side. Walking, because of course Kirishima forces him to slow down. He keeps his face turned away from Kirishima, and shrugs his arm off, starting to pick his pace up again.

"Aw, come on, man," Kirishima pouts. "Don't just leave me. Look bro, I know you're exercising or whatever, but like, at least say hi to me. I mean, we're friends aren't we?"

"I don't wanna fuckin' talk to you," Bakugou bites out harshly. "And we're not friends, Shitty Hair. I don't even like you." The presence by his side fades away, and he turns to look behind him out of the corner of his eye. Kirishima is standing in the middle of the sidewalk, looking a bit like a lost puppy. Bakugou almost stops. He almost turns around and pretends that it was a joke. Haha, really fooled you that time. He doesn't stop. Tears of self loathing are still running down his face, and he can't bring himself to turn around. Can't bring himself to reveal just how weak he is to one of the only friends he has.

The only friends Bakugou has ever had have been admirers. In middle school, his friends loved his quirk. They loved how strong he was. How cool he was. He has to keep that front up now, or he'll be alone again. As lonely as it feels to be the loner of his group of friends, it still beats being a loner without a group of friends.

He's too far lost in his thoughts to notice the sound of pounding footsteps behind him, and is therefore shocked when his arm is grabbed, jerking him to a stop. On instinct, he raises his other arm, and detonates a small blast.

"Come on, man," Kirishima pushes. "Did I do something wrong?" He turns Bakugou to face him, and immediately falters. "Are you okay bro? What happened to your eye?"

"Let go of me," Bakugou snarls.

"Please, Bakugou," Kirishima pleads. "I'm worried about you. You've been quieter than normal the past couple of days, and then you didn't show up to school today. Then I find you with a black eye? I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Yeah. I'm fucking peachy," Bakugou rolls his eyes. "Now will you leave me alone?"

"Alright, fine," Kirishima relents. "But I just want you to know that however much you deny it, we are friends." Katsuki is already gone leaving Kirishima to peter off disappointedly.

When Bakugou finally stops running the sun has started to set. A quick glance at his phone screen shows the time (6:13 PM), ten missed calls (from his mother), and a barrage of texts (twelve from his mother, angry, and two from his father, concerned). He takes the time to read them all, starting with his father's.

Masaru:

5:42 PM: Your mother and I are worried, Katsuki. I know you're upset, but please come home so that we can discuss things calmly.

6:03 PM: Do you need anything? I can meet you somewhere. Please at least message me to let me know that you are safe.

Mitsuki

5:07 PM: Where are you?!

5:07 PM: This is unacceptable behavior Katsuki!

5:09 PM: Answer your phone!

5:11 PM: Katsuki, come home now

5:11 PM: You're grounded

5:45 PM: Answer your phone dammit

5:52 PM: Fine!

5:52 PM: If you don't want to come home, then don't

5:52 PM: But don't you dare change your mind

5:53 PM: If you try to step one foot inside of this house, I will not hesitate to throw you back out.

5:54 PM: Stupid, ungrateful, bitch

5:54 PM: Why do we open our home to you if you're just going to throw the offer back in our faces?

Well, the good news is that his mother's messages help explain his father's last message. The bad news is that, if he's understanding things correctly (which he is), he's been temporarily kicked out. Neat.

He heads to a nearby convenience store. A soft ding alerts the man behind the counter to his presence. He glances up from his magazine, barely, but says nothing. Katsuki heads to the back of the store grabbing a couple of water bottles. His stomach grumbles loudly, and he appeases the monster by picking up a bowl of instant ramen on his way to the front. He sets his purchases on the counter, reaching into his pocket for his wallet, and frowning when he feels emptiness instead of hard faux leather. He checks every other pocket, twice, and groans quietly when he realizes that he's left his wallet at home. The cashier looks impatient, having already rung up his purchases and told him the total.

"Hey, you gonna pay for this crap, or what kid? I don't got all day," the man grumbles. Normally Katsuki would retort back, but today he can't find the energy to.

"Nevermind, I left my wallet at home," he replies. He stalks out of the store, crossing the street to sit on a bench at the nearby park. Once he sits down, he allows a wave of exhaustion to wash over him. He's just so tired. He's tired of fighting, tired of trying to be a hero when everything he does just turns him into more of a villain.

Izuku, Aizawa, Kirishima. Anyone in his life that has ever actually seemed to care about him, has been pushed away. He pushes them away because he's angry, and defensive. He pushes them away because they drag up his emotions from the boxes that he hides them in, deep in his heart. He doesn't need help. That would mean he was weak, and he's not weak. He's strong. He's the strongest in his class dammit, and he's going to work hard to make sure that one day he'll be stronger than All Might. He's not going to let anyone stand in his way.

"Katsuki?" a motherly voice sounds behind him. Mrs. Midoriya. He turns cautiously. "Oh! I thought that was you, Katsuki. I was just out picking up some last-minute ingredients for dinner tonight. I'm making katsudon." She gives him a once over, and he can almost swear that she hesitates for a moment before smiling brightly. "You should come eat with us!"

"That's okay," he replies. "I wouldn't want to be any trouble. I'm sure you were only planning to cook for yourself and D-Izuku."

"Nonsense! It won't be any trouble at all. I always cook an extra dinner portion, just in case someone comes over. I'm sure Izuku would love to see you as well. He said that he noticed you weren't in school today. He sounded worried." A stab of guilt runs through Katsuki. Brief, but enough to convince him to accept her offer. Damn nerd, always worrying about everyone except himself. They walk together to the bus stop. Before Katsuki has a chance to speak up and inform Inko that he has no money for a bus pass, she has already purchased tickets for both of them. Once they've sat down on the bus, she ruffles her hand through his hair. He resists the urge to flinch.

"You're a good kid, Katsuki," she smiles. If only she knew. His only reply is a quiet grunt. The rest of the bus ride is filled with a somewhat comfortable silence.

"Izuku, baby, I'm home!" Inko calls after they get to the house. Moments later a mop of curly green hair appears from within a room at the end of the hallway.

"Hey mom!" He calls back. "O-oh. Hey Kacchan."

"Hey," Katsuki greets him, feeling awkward.

"I'll be out in a minute. Just let me finish my paragraph." Of course. Homework. Katsuki carries the bag of groceries into the kitchen. Inko unloads it onto the counter, as Bakugou goes to the sink to wash his hands.

"All right, what do you want me to do?" He wonders.

"I didn't have you over so that you would help me cook," Inko speaks from where she's rummaging through the fridge.

"Well somebody has to help you once and a while. And I wouldn't trust Izuku near a stove, hot or cold," Katsuki snarks good-naturedly.

"In that case," Inko smiles softly. "I'll let you chop the veggies. You've always been better at that than me."

It's soothing, chopping vegetables while Inko prepares the pork. She's humming softly, and he can almost feel the peace and comfort radiating off of her. It's so different from his own mother. He can feel himself relaxing, feels his defensive walls slipping ever so slightly. She doesn't ask about his eye, or about why if he couldn't be at school, then what was he doing at the park? There are no accusations, no assumptions. Just, a sort of methodical aura. After probably ten minutes, Katsuki opens his mouth and begins to speak.

"I- I have to tell you something," he admits, clearing his throat. What is he doing? He can't- She'll-

"Okay," it's a simple reply, but he knows her better. She's listening intently, giving him all of her attention. She cares about what he has to say.

"It's about Izuku, and why he's been, uh, upset recently." No turning back now. "He um. I- I hurt him." He almost wants to stop, but his lips keep moving. The pent up words that have been ricocheting against his skull for the past couple of days, tearing him up from the inside out have settled, to funnel out of his mouth in a whirlwind. "I've been making fun of him for so long, pushing him away, pushing him down. He-he was quirkless, and weak, and I-I guess I hated him for that. At least I think I did. I didn't think it was a big deal, he always got up, brushed himself off, and walked away with a smile. I guess I thought that if I pushed hard enough he would give up on his dreams of being a hero. Better I hurt him now than some villain in the future that hurts him beyond recovery, right?" he laughs bitterly. "Turns out I'm the villain. I, uh, told him to jump off a building the other day. Just fuckin' suicide baited the nerd. Which led to my suspension, pending review and expulsion, and of course I'm sure Aizawa hates me now, and I'm sure you hate me, and whether he does or not, Deku should hate me too." His rambling cuts off abruptly as he is enveloped in Inko's strong arms. A sob tears through his being. He hates this vulnerability, but he's exhausted. He's tired of trying to fight his way through this battlefield of emotions, of forcing his anger to be the forefront of his attitude to hide his insecurities.

"Your actions are inexcusable, but not beyond repair and forgiveness," Inko murmurs. "You are not a villain unless you choose to be." And then Bakugou cries. Really, truly, cries. Inko is patient. Her arms stay wrapped around him like a solid fortress until he pushes away, hastily wiping at his eyes.

"I'm gonna go set the table," Inko's eyes are warm, and just a touch damp. "If you wouldn't mind, could you pull the pork off of the stove in about three minutes? If I'm not mistaken, Izuku will have gotten pulled into that writing of his, and I'll need to let him know the food is ready. You know how he gets with those kinds of things."

"Yeah," a small smile worms its way onto Katsuki's visage. He can visualize Izuku scribbling away furiously. Probably ranting about some pro-hero. Pfft, nerd. As Inko leaves the kitchen, Katsuki finds himself ruminating on their conversation. Inko has taken the news of his bullying surprisingly… well. She has every right to be angry, but she's not.

What is it with the Midoriya family and their self-sacrificing kindness? Deku jumps into a villain fight for someone who literally bullies him for fun, and Inko gives him a second chance after he tells her son to off himself. What kind of bullshit was this? His own mother was less forgiving when he accidentally set off his quirk during a nightmare once.

He pulls the chicken off the stove and brings the dishes to the table, where he sits awkwardly, waiting for the Midoriya's to rejoin him. He only has to wait for about thirty seconds. They sit around the table, and the meal is beyond bearable. It's enjoyable, though Katsuki would never admit that to anyone. The Bakugou family generally doesn't eat meals together, but when they do, chaos reigns supreme. They usually can only go about two minutes without either he or Mitsuki starting an argument. Here, with the Midoriya's, the table conversation is light, with a few jokes sprinkled in for good measure. In fact, at one point, Izuku is laughing so hard he starts to choke. Katsuki waits for Inko's disapproving 'chew your food, don't be an animal' or something similar. Instead, she waits patiently for him to stop coughing, asks if he's all right, and then moves on. If only life could be this simple all the time.

He washes the dishes, despite Inko's protests. Dek-Izuku dries them and puts them away despite his protests.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Izuku starts off quietly. "But I wanted to ask about your eye. I-It just looks like it hurts, and I was wondering what happened. You, um, don't have to tell me, but if you want to, I-I'm listening."

"It's none of your fucking business," Katsuki snarls more harshly than he intends to. "I uh- I don't wanna talk about it."

"Oh, okay," Izuku falters for a second then nods in determination. "Then I won't ask about it!" Damn it all, that kid is too good. Maybe that's why Katsuki hates him so much. Because he wants to be the best, but he knows there's know way he could be better than Izuku. Stronger? Definitely. Smarter? Absolutely. More heroic?

Never in a thousand years.

He bows as he's leaving, and thanks Inko for her hospitality. It's just the two of them at the doorway, Izuku has already bid him goodbye, and she reaches a hand out. His flinch is poorly concealed, and he's sure she knows, but she doesn't say anything. Her fingers barely brush the bruise underneath his eye, the one she must have noticed before now, in fact he's sure she noticed it in the park, when she looked him over and paused. Her fingers brush it, but she doesn't comment on it, doesn't ask. She initiates eye contact, and he sees that her eyes are shimmering with a few unshed tears.

"Remember Katsuki," she instructs. "You are always welcome here." Even when you aren't welcome elsewhere. It's left unsaid, an implication that she knows. Some part of him wants to be angry. She's an adult, she's supposed to do something if she knows, right? Another larger part of him is burning with fresh tears. It's been so long since he's held any modicum of trust for an adult, but Inko has given him hope that one day, maybe he could again.