I am blushing a little bit as I post this chapter...
*WARNING: The story becomes M rating this chapter*
Fifteen: Dirty Things
Jane's POV
I could not believe what I had just insinuated.
Seth's eyes were locked, his jawline rigid and pulsating. I swear, I had every intention of going to dinner tonight, but once he saw me, I couldn't help myself from becoming overcome with need for him. I had always thought that that "look" from every cliché romance film or from a fictional novel was just that: fiction. Only, Seth had looked at me like I was the sexiest woman in the entire world.
It made me feel powerful, bold even, and I had lost all inhibition once I realized how badly I wanted him, too. I was so used to leading with my head, but I just couldn't do that with Seth right now; other hormones were taking over, demanding my attention.
"Jane," Seth finally breathed. An audible gulp followed. "I don't want- I mean, I want to; I really, really want to, but I don't need to. Not if you're not certain."
Seth's words thawed an icy part of my heart that I never thought would melt after everything terrible that had happened to me before. He was so kind, and his words were even more selfless considering the fact that his face disagreed with what he said to such an extent. I could see how physically difficult it was for him not to reach for me, and I knew that he was doing it because he was worried that I wasn't ready.
In all rational thought, I probably wasn't ready, but I had waited my whole life for a fairytale that I was convinced was impossible to have, I wasn't about to miss up my opportunity. That, and my heart was racing with adrenaline, desire seeping into my bones just from the way that this beautiful man's eyes were bearing into my skin. He was something else.
I took a brave step forward. "You kind of seem like you need it," I told him slowly, watching as my words caused a blanket of craving to hood his eyes.
Seth shook his head once, his eyes suddenly set definitively at mine. "I need you." His composure evaporated, and Seth pushed me up against the wall.
A small gasp slipped from my mouth right before he crushed his soft, incredible lips against mine.
Oh, wow, I moaned inside of my head. Seth's dominance right in that moment pushed me over the edge, and brought out a desire in me that I had never felt before. I wasn't just turned on, I was ignited. I didn't just want him to touch me, I needed him to. I kissed him back, passion dancing between both of our tongues as I came undone for him.
Without thinking, I hitched my thigh up on the side of him and rubbed myself against him, the ache from between my legs controlling me. It was begging for him to touch me. Seth's warm hands slid beneath my thighs, and suddenly he latched onto them tightly. I gasped as he lifted me into the air, opening my eyes for a single moment only to see the way that his long, muscular arms tensed with my weight.
Oh my God. I felt like I was going to erupt at any second.
Seth set me down on a small table against the wall only a few feet away, and then immediately I opened up my legs and locked them around his torso. I could feel him pressed into me, hard and solid and pulsating. It caused my hands to shake; a good shake. A needy, desperate shake right as his lips found my sweet spot, a spot right below my earlobe on the side of my neck.
I let out a loud moan, unable to contain my pleasure anymore, and suddenly Seth's hand clasped tightly around my hip.
I pressed myself tighter to him and closed my eyes up at the ceiling. This was pure heaven.
Seth's hands began roaming up my body now, and the anticipation was enough to make me quiver with burning, hot desire for him. My body must have been running at 150 degrees, but I never, ever wanted it to end. He tilted my chin down, and his lips met my open mouth gentler now, slower even. It made my head spin.
I felt his fingertips gaze against the seem where my skin met the low neckline of my dress, and I shook underneath his touch. Seth's fingers froze. He pulled away.
I was about to beg him to keep going, when he slid each of his pinkie fingers underneath of the straps on my shoulders, and suddenly pulled my dress and my bra down. Both of the fabrics fell into my lap, and I was suddenly fully exposed to him.
He let out a deep groan out of the back of his throat as I watched his eyes take me in. I knew that my nipples were begging for him, and I knew from the way that his jaw tensed that he could tell.
"Please?" I breathed, the only thing that I could think to say to let him know that I needed him to touch me right this instant or I was going to spontaneously combust. Thankfully, that was all the ammunition he needed.
Seth cupped my breasts in his hands, and his warm palms sent my body into a frenzy. He was so gentle with me, but in a way that only made me want more. It was sweet torture as he decided what to do with me, but as soon as his thumbs brushed against my nipples, I let out a loud breath of relief. Pleasure swarmed my body, infecting my blood stream and sprinting around my entire body, on a fast track to the spot right between my legs.
His thumbs worked in a painfully slow rhythm, up and down and up and down against the center of my breasts. My lips quivered as I bit the center of them, trying not to cry out or beg for more. My thighs were so tight that I could feel them shaking, pressing themselves tighter to him all on their own doing.
He dipped his head, and suddenly I felt his tongue flick against my nipple.
"Holy fuck," I breathed without thinking. My mouth fell open as he softly stroked me with his tongue, and then did the same thing with the other one. I could tell myself coming apart for him; every touch was a new layer, until I swear I was a ball of just nerves that were humming in overdrive, needing every part of this incredible man.
Seth's lips kissed slowly back up to my neck. He pressed his thumbs into my nipples, holding the pressure there. "Oh my God, Seth," I breathed. My breaths were quick and choppy. I had to close my eyes because the room was spinning.
Seth kissed my jawline, my actual jaw, and then spent his sweet time caressing my collarbone with gentle, sensual kisses. He dropped his sinful, heavenly hands to my sides and began running his fingertips up and down bare skin of my stomach.
I let out a whimper when he traced an invisible shape oh so gently against the skin of my lower stomach. My entire abdomen hardened, and I wrapped my shaking arms around his neck, pulling myself closer.
"I need you," I breathed into the air. It was all that I could think about. I wanted him inside of me. I needed him there right now.
"Not here," He murmured against my skin.
I nearly screamed at him. I felt like I was going to die. What the heck did he mean by that?
"But," I whimpered, my voice high and filled with desperation. I would have been embarrassed if I wasn't so overcome with lust.
"I mean not here, on top of a table. Jane," Seth clarified. He pulled back and brushed the hair out of my eyes. I momentarily forgot how to breathe when he looked at me, my breath catching in my throat. Seth's eyes were hooded with intense, overwhelming desire that pierced through every nerve and inch of my soul. Whatever I was feeling, I could see that he was feeling it, too.
He cupped my face in his hands as he spoke. Me? I was mesmerized. "I want to take my time with you," Seth whispered. "I want to memorize your body, and make you feel things you never thought you could feel."
"Fuck," I breathed, closing my eyes.
"Is that okay with you?" I could hear the humor in his voice as he pressed his lips to the center of my chest, kissing down until he reached right between my breasts.
"Jane?" He breathed, his thumbs running up and down my nipples once again.
"Yes," I moaned loudly. "Yes just don't stop."
"I'm not even doing anything yet," He kissed me deeply, sending my mind and body spinning in a whirlwind. Seth lifted me off of the table the same way that he put me on it and began walking us towards the living room.
I tangled my fingers in his hair and kissed him deeply, pressing my center tight against his that seemed to grow harder with every step. Holy hell, I was on the verge of a physical collapse; with every second it felt like I wasn't going to be able to take it anymore, but it just kept getting better.
Seth laid me down along the couch and then held himself over top of me. I tangled one foot around his knee, pulling him down closer to me. Needing to feel the contours of his body pressing tightly against mine that were aching for him.
"You're so impatient," He whispered against my lips, but his voice wasn't mocking nor was it sensual. It was a statement; a sexy, sexy, sexy statement. "I love that," He finished, before pulling up and running his eyes mercilessly along my body.
I writhed uncomfortably. The wetness between my legs was almost embarrassing now. I could feel it against my thighs, pooling there, waiting of him expectantly. Only, he kept watching me. The anticipation flipped a switch inside of my body, my desire increasing with every passing second, wondering what he was going to do to me.
"Seth," I complained, breathing heavily. "What are you doing?"
He squinted his eyes. "Trying to figure out where to start," He stated seriously.
My mouth dropped. I moaned and covered my eyes with the backs of my hands, arching my back in the air.
"That's wonderful. Could you hurry up?"
Seth lowered himself on top of me, his face at my stomach. I lowered my arms to see him smiling up at me, his hands bunching up my dress at the sides.
"I love how impatient you are," He kissed right underneath my belly button.
I licked my lips and then bit the center. "You already said that."
"It needed to be said again; that's how much I love it."
Seth swiftly pulled the dress and my bra over top of my butt and down my legs. I heart them fall to the floor with a light thud as my lips parted expectantly. I was now nearly bare in front of him. Seth's gentle, caring eyes took in how I looked in nothing but my lace underwear slowly, though thankfully not as slowly as he was when he was looking at me before.
Seth lowered himself down so that his face was equal with my hips. I bit the corner of my lip so hard I must have drawn blood, only, I couldn't feel anything. My hips were practically screaming at every cell in my entire body. There was an undeniable heat seeping between my legs that was becoming hotter and hotter by the second. I had no idea that this kind of need was even possible. Everything was spinning.
Seth lowered his head, only, he spent his time lightly kissing the tops of my tights, and the skin tight up against the seam of my panties. He caressed every inch of my bare skin with kisses, running his hot, hot hands up and down my thighs.
I let out a whimper of need and arched my back in the air. Seth stopped my thighs from parting by catching them in his hands, and then rubbing the backs of my thighs, his hands sliding up the skin there until he curved his palms around my ass and then back down again.
"Seth," I moaned. I tried to say more but I found my brain to have shut off. I opened my eyes and had to blink the blurriness away. "I'm dizzy."
Seth's hot breath hit the top seam of my panties as he laughed against my skin, making me gasp. "You need to breathe."
I moaned again in response.
Thankfully, after what felt like a century, I finally felt Seth's palms sliding to the insides of my thighs. He ran his steaming hands up the skin there, parting my legs without even having to ask me. I rested my knees against the couch cushions as he now peppered the insides of my thighs with kisses.
"Fuck," I gasped. The spot right between my legs was not only dripping for him now, but it was pulsating. I could feel it, like it had a heartbeat; in that second it did, and it was beating for Seth. God, I needed him.
Suddenly, Seth kissed the center of my underwear, right overtop of exactly where my inner-turmoil was begging for him to go. I let out a loud moan, for I had been waiting for that for so long, and I needed more, more, more.
Seth moaned something back, his hot breath hitting my center, but I was too far gone to hear what he said. He pressed his fingers against me now, running them up and down my sides, painfully ignoring my center, the part that really needed him.
"Seth," I whimpered, and then when he didn't respond I shifted my hips so that his fingers were suddenly right overtop of where I needed him to be.
I sucked in a quick gasp, which was followed by a loud moan.
Seth's voice sounded heavy now. "You're so sexy, Jane," His voice practically dripped with need as he finally moved his fingers on his own accord, up and down against my center, right over top of my panties.
I moaned and nodded my head into the air. "Don't stop," I begged, moving my hips in rhythm with his fingers.
"God, Jane," Seth murmured, his voice quiet. I looked down to see his eyes hard, his jaw tensed. He was breathing heavier, too. He slipped his fingers underneath my panties and pulled them to the side, revealing myself to him. I was too electrified to even feel embarrassed, though not to feel the slight pang of victory when he moaned and shook his head, slipping his thumb inside of me.
I gasped and arched my back on the couch, opening my mouth and my eyes to the ceiling. I knew how wet I was for him, but it still shocked me how easily he slipped inside of me.
"Does that hurt?" Seth asked me, his voice breathy and hoarse.
"No," I whimpered, tilting my chin down to meet his eyes. "Seth, I want you."
I watched as any and all control he might have had crumbled. Seth pulled his finger out of me and swiftly slid my panties off of my body. He lifted his shift off of his head in one swift motion as he moved over top of me.
I reached for the waistband of his pants and had just unzipped them when his hot hand suddenly curled over top of my own. "Shit," Seth spoke with much difficulty. He winced, as if it was painful to stop himself. "I don't have a condom."
I breathed a breath of relief. "That's okay," I pulled his jeans down. "I have an IUD."
I tugged on his boxers, but he was too hard for the fabric to pull over top of it without assistance. Jesus; I merely blushed at how big Seth must have been.
"A what?"
I chuckled. "Birth control."
"Oh," I swear I heard him let out a breath of relief. "Are you sure?" He was breathless. I felt his finger touch my chin and push my face up. I connected my eyes with his beautiful, sensitive ones, and immediately knew that I had never been surer of anything else in my entire life than I was in this moment. "Are you comfortable with me with... nothing on?"
"Yes," I slid my arms behind his back. "I want to feel you."
Seth moaned and then quickly tugged his boxers down. My eyes widened. My lips parted but I quickly pressed them back together. I had never thought that part of a man could be attractive, but damn, Seth's was huge, sexy, too. I laid my head back down as Seth began placing, soft kisses along my collarbone.
I tried to remind myself to breathe; I wanted Seth more than anything, but I would be lying if I said that I wasn't nervous. I was a virgin, and I had heard horror stories. I had no idea what to expect, but I trusted Seth, and at this point my body was making all the decisions, so there was no going back now, not that I would have ever wanted to.
"Just relax," Seth breathed against my chest.
"Mmm," I nodded my head.
I felt him rub himself against my entrance and immediately gasped. That felt incredible. Seth was so soft. I stifled a moan and squinted my forehead tightly, shooting my eyes closed.
The first hints of pressure weren't so bad. It was after a few inches that I really felt the pain. It was deeper than I thought; like the pain was coming from inside of my abdomen. I bit the corner of my lip to keep from crying out, but I knew that I wasn't able to hide the wince on my face.
Seth kissed my jawline, going so, so, so slow. His fingers delicately danced through my hair, whispering sweet promises and words of affirmation as he slowly pressed himself inside of me.
I whimpered, not meaning to, but the pain was the most intense now. It was so intense, like I was ripping on the inside. He moved just a tiny bit forward and my body pulled back, a sharp pain shooting from my stomach down my thighs.
"Are you okay?" Seth asked into my ear.
I whimpered and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face into his neck. I didn't want him to see me in pain like this, but when he wrapped his arms tightly around my back and lowered me to the couch, I felt like there was no one in the whole world that would care for me and protect me the way that Seth was right now.
He was so gentle with me, and it was odd how my body was taking that. It hurt so badly, but it felt kind of... good, too.
"Should I stop?" Seth asked gently.
I shook my head.
"Can I move inside of you?" He asked now, his voice soft.
I took a few deep breaths. "Slow."
"Of course, Jane." He dipped his head to find that sensitive spot of mine on my neck and I gasped when he sucked on my skin there. After a moment, Seth did as I asked. He started moving out and then in. He moved slowly and carefully, and all the while his hands gently caressed my body, until the pain began to dull, and a new sensation took its place.
I always wondered what this would feel like. This... was definitely not it. I always thought that it would feel like how it felt when I touched the outside of myself. It did not feel like that at all... it felt better.
As he moved, Seth hit a spot inside of me that sent sharp arrows of pleasure up my spine. It was an overwhelming, pleasurable feeling that overtook me. I couldn't help a whimper from slipping between my lips, but this time it was from pleasure, not from pain.
"Oh, Seth," I breathed, loosening my hold on his neck. "Fuck," I breathed, closing my eyes.
He moved a little faster inside of me now, so in tune with my body, and my mouth actually dropped with the newfound intensity. Holy shit. I had never felt something better in my entire life.
My moans were high-pitched now, more like whines, and they came in rhythm with the tempo of him hitting that deep spot inside of me that made my forehead crease.
"Fuck, Seth," I gasped, my voice high-pitched and unrecognizable.
He moaned, and then suddenly I felt his fingers against my clit. I hadn't realized the built-up nerves that were there until he pressed his thumb right against it. I cried out in pure ecstasy. Something was happening to my abdomen; it was tightening and pulsating and filling my entire body from my head with my toes with an undeniable feeling of overwhelming gratification. He rubbed it gently just a few times, before my body completely exploded, rocking and shaking against the part of him that was still inside of me.
Seth's POV
Jane was a fucking angel.
I pulled up to see her face when she had the first orgasm that I would ever give her. Jane's face was contorted in pleasure, her forehead scrunched in concentration and her lips dipped in a small "o" with broken breaths slipping from her mouth.
She came with the most intense orgasm I had ever seen before, her tight self pulsating around me, that alone enough to bring me to my peak.
I stifled a moan as I pulled myself out of her, watching her body shake and quiver beneath me. It was too much for me to handle. I finished on top of her, letting go right on her lower abdomen. The sight of cumming on Jane's naked body was something that I hoped never to forget, but, I knew that I would never be able to forget anything about tonight for as long as I lived.
Jane's body relaxed just as mine did, and I looked down to see her eyes closed as her chest moved quickly with each deep breath.
I used my shirt to wipe away the mess on her stomach and then laid down next to her. Jane's eyes were still closed, but she was biting her lip now, an indication that she was not sleeping.
I brushed the back of my finger across her cheek. I had tried my best to make everything about her tonight, to go as slow as possible and make her feel amazing, even though I knew that it was inevitable for her first time to hurt. However, I worried right now that I had hurt her.
Jane's eyes batted open. She connected her beautiful, shining brown eyes with mine, and held my gaze. A small smile filled her beautiful, pristine face.
"Want to know another secret?" She asked, her voice innocent and shy once again, all remnants of the sexy, brash and throaty noises from earlier having completely left.
"I want to know all of your secrets," I told her gently.
Jane reached for my hand and then brought it to her mouth. She kissed my palm and then climbed overtop of me. I welcomed her easily, already feeling myself harden yet again at the imprint of her naked body against my own.
"That was the first orgasm I've ever had," She blushed.
My breath caught in my throat. I forced myself to swallow as I blinked to myself a few times. The thought made me feel slightly nauseous. From what Jane had told me, I knew that her and her ex had done... stuff. She never went into detail, but I could pretty much conquer what that "stuff" was. The fact that she had hadn't been worshiped and loved and pleased made me want to kill something. But then I looked at her wide, gentle and hopeful eyes, and all anger evaporated.
I stroked the hair out of her face. "Was it okay?" I asked her gently.
Jane giggled, a blush forming on her cheeks. "Seth Clearwater! What do you think?"
I chuckled and brushed her cheeks with my thumbs. "I think that it's adorable that you get embarrassed now. Also, I think it's really hot that you cuss so much when I'm touching you, especially considering you don't when I'm not."
She blushed even harder. "That's another secret. No one has to know that I have a dirty mouth when I'm doing certain things," She bit the corner of her lip.
I widened my eyes. "Sweetheart, every single thing that just happened is mine and mine only. Forever."
Jane's smile widened, showing off her shining, white teeth. "Forever's a long time," She murmured.
I nodded my head slowly. "So is 19 years to wait to have an orgasm. I've got a lot of making up to do."
Jane blushed, and then she dropped down to the side of me and buried her sweet face into the nook of my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around her tightly, just wanting her to feel protected, and promised her things inside of my mind that she would never know.
"Thank you for being so gentle with me," Jane murmured.
I closed my eyes. "Jane," I told her slowly. "Please, never thank me for that. You deserve to be treated like that. You deserve everything."
"Do I deserve a round two?" She suddenly flirted. Jane lifted her head to match her gaze with me.
My eyes widened, my body immediately reacting to her words. I would live inside of Jane if I could "Already?"
Jane giggled and then bit the corner of her lip. "Not quite yet. I don't want to put out too soon after the first time. I wouldn't want you to get the wrong impression."
"And what impression would that be, exactly?" I asked her. "Because I have a lot of impressions of you: sexy, beautiful, perfect- none of which involve 'easy'."
Jane chuckled. "I have lots of impressions of you, too," She whispered sweetly.
"Oh yeah?" My voice dripped into that soft tone that I only ever used for her. God, I still couldn't believe that I had been inside of her. Jane was the sexiest, most beautiful woman I had ever imagined in my wildest dreams. Sleeping with her was otherworldly. "And what would those be?"
She blushed. "Sweet," She began, "Teasing, gentle, kind, amazing with his hands... should I go on?"
"You could go on all night," I grinned at her.
She chuckled. "Think we could still make the reservation?" She suddenly bit the corner of her lip in nervousness. "I'm starving."
I checked my watch. "No way," I couldn't help but laugh. "But I'll take you to In-and-Out if you're interested?"
"Yes!" Jane's eyes lit up. She quickly sat up and then rolled over top of me to grab her clothes off of the floor. I tried not to be a total pig as I watched her re-dress herself, but I couldn't help much of it.
"Oh," I watched as Jane's cheeks suddenly heat up in embarrassment. "Well, I can't wear those," She murmured, dropping her panties back onto the ground. She was already dressed back in her dress and her bra, but was right now pantiless. The thought made me so hard.
Of course she wouldn't have been able to wear those; she had soaked them through the fabric. I remember this because I had merely had a heart attack of need, desire, and amazement when I had noticed.
"Be right back," Jane bounced towards the stairs. Well, at least she wasn't sore.
"Oh!" I suddenly remembered. "Could you grab me a clean shirt? Maybe one that you have that's big?"
She turned her head and looked at me oddly. "I don't think I have any tee-shirts that would fit you," She told me honestly. "Why?"
I raised my eyebrows, looking from my shirt and then back to her. "Well," I began slowly.
Suddenly, Jane's eyes widened three sizes too big. "Oh!" Her entire face erupted in red. "Right, ugh- yes! I can give you one of my dad's old shirts." She suddenly looked a little bit freaked out. "Is that super duper wrong? Putting your boyfriend in your dead dad's tee-shirt after you just lost your virginity to said-boyfriend."
I cringed. "Alright," I stood and clapped my hands. "I'm going topless. And going to church."
Jane giggled and covered her face with her hand. "Sorry! Word vomit! I'll grab you a shirt."
I shook my head at her and silently laughed as she sprinted up the stairs. That was adorable. Everything about Jane was adorable, and I suddenly just realized dripping with sex appeal as well. Jane was definitely a freak in the sheets; the girl never said a cuss word and suddenly it was the "f bomb" every three seconds as she fisted my hair.
I shivered at the memory. I wish I had a mind that I could replay my memories over and over and over again. Then, I reminded myself that if I didn't fuck this up, I would have forever to remake that memory thousands of different ways.
I slipped on my pants and took a deep breath. I wanted to at least attempt to be respectful tonight; the last thing I wanted Jane thinking was that just because we had sex once I now expected it all the time.
Jane returned a few minutes later in a tank top and pair of super sexy fabric shorts. She grinned and held out a grey tee-shirt to me. "Here," She offered it to me.
"Thanks Jane," I told her happily, not wanting her to get sad at the fact that I was wearing her dad's shirt. I slipped it over top of my head and suddenly found me feeling sad myself; I could smell the faint hint of a cologne clinging to the fabric.
Only, Jane tilted her head and smiled so innocently at me, I just had to smile back, any hints of anything besides gratefulness and joy evaporating off of me in an instant.
"I really wish you could have met my dad," Jane grinned. "He would have loved you."
I swallowed harshly, nodding my head and taking a slow, deep breath. I reached for her cheeks and pulled her close to me, wrapping my arms protectively around her as I kissed her, gently this time, not sexually like before. I just wanted to somehow convey in a kiss that I was never, ever going to let anything bad happen to her ever again. She was never going to be alone again.
"Granted," Jane whispered as she pulled away. "He probably isn't too happy with you as of now."
I swatted at her butt as she giggled and skipped towards the door. "You coming?" She bit the corner of her lip.
Boy, I could spend the rest of my life listening to her ask me that.
Eeeee! Can't wait to hear what you all thought of this chapter!
