Hey there everyone! It has been a minute... or a billion minutes since you last heard from me. I do apologize for the big delay in getting this chapter out, but life has been rough mentally lately, and I kind of need my brain to work properly for me to get down to writing. This chapter was also a bit of a struggle to write, because I had to commit to certain world building aspects and make sure they work with the story later on. So I had to do a lot of thinking about the story and how it would progress to the end. I had the beginning and end all mapped out, but the meat of the story had just been all these different ideas that couldn't all work together. I had to get to a point where I was comfortable with scraping ideas and sticking to others and telling myself I can't do everything I want in this fic. It would be all over the place if I didn't edit. That being said, this whole chapter is from Finn's pov. I know, I know, after such a long wait, you want some Ben and Rey interaction. Me too! But since Finn knows certain things, I wanted to do his perspective so we can get more background and more of the worldbuilding aspects. But next chapter is Ben and Rey focused! I swear! As always, thank you so much to anyone who leaves a comment or even a kudos. I do go back and read them to help me get motivated to sit down and write. You all are amazing!

Another problem I've been having is just being too hard on myself and my writing. Like, I don't think it's that good. I got in a headspace where I couldn't write a single sentence because I was being so hard on myself. But you know what? I'm not a professional writer and this is fanfiction. I need to stop holding myself up to this high standard when I don't need to. I want to have fun writing again. I'm on a journey to enjoy it again!

Little overview to catch you guys up to speed since it's been so long since the last update:

Ben goes to the community theatre to meet Rose, only to find that Rey is there. He is ambushed by the director about how happy she is he can be in the play on short notice. Rose blindsided Ben by volunteering him for the part, Ben gets upset, storms out, but Rose convinces him to accept. While outside, Rey runs into him and they decide to start over and get to know each other. She promises Ben that she will tell him the truth, but she needs time. He agrees to be patient.

Flashback: 1909 London, Lorraine is 14 and had just finished performing as a guest performer for the London Symphony. Ben is taking her around downtown after the performance, with Armitage following them as a babysitter. Ben and Rey go to a dress shop, but Ben won't allow her to choose the dress she wants. He talks over and makes the decision on what to get without her consent, and Armitage notices. He talks to Lorraine as Ben pays for the dress, telling her that women should be listened to, and if he were engaged to her, he would make that happen. Lorraine questions whether being a wife would take away her freedom. Doubts of marrying Ben begin to surface.

Back to present time: A week goes by and it's a Saturday rehearsal. Rey is getting food for her and Ben while on a break and runs into Phasma. Rey can sense she is like Finn, is startled that Phasma talks to her since no other Reapers – besides Finn – have ever interacted with her. She vaguely threatens Finn by telling Rey she knows Finn is in the play. Reapers are not supposed to take part in the human world. It ends with Rey running back to the theatre to find Finn.

I apologize for any grammar mistakes or typos. There just comes a point where I can't keep re-reading the chapter and just need to post it!

Content and trigger warnings for this chapter: talks of child abuse/violence and kidnapping. Does not go into great detail, but is talked about.

And now since you're all caught up, onto the chapter!

Chapter 7: Rumors

Present day – May 2nd, 2020

In reality, Finn had only known Rose a little over a month, but it had only taken that very first time of seeing her for her to become a very important person in his life. Before he knew anything beyond what his eyes could tell him, before they spoke one word to each other, Finn had already been drawn into her presence.

It had been confusing. Still was. But being around her felt so good, so right, that Finn was too afraid to question it. And c'mon, questions rarely yielded the answers one wanted to hear.

"So, yeah…" Rose sighed, folding her arms across her chest as she sat on the black metal chair. She was dressed comfortably, wearing a purple sweatshirt and black sweatpants, ready for the long Saturday rehearsal they were currently in the middle of having.

Finn and Rose were not needed for the current scene that was being workshopped. So when Rose had asked Finn if he wanted to take a break in the warehouse attached to the backstage, he wasn't going to say no.

Finn situated himself in the open seat across from her, a rickety wooden chair flecked with various colors of paint. A reminder cycled on repeat in his mind: glance away, don't stare at her, don't come off as a creep… because normal people didn't stare incessantly at the other person while having a conversation.

Be normal, he repeated in his mind. Like just thinking it would somehow grant him such an ability.

Rose continued: "Paige and I decided to become business partners and open up a club. But I wanted it to be more about comfort and not just, like, partying, which is why it's also a restaurant with legit food and good seating. We hired a chef to come up with a menu, and had him bring in his own staff." As the passion in her voice heightened, so, too, did her excited hand gestures. "But we really wanted that part of the club to be about relaxation and getting your second wind for the night. So we put up these sound suppressant, see-through walls on the top balcony where you can dine with other people and not be rattled by the music too much." She shrugged and said, "Costs more money to reserve, but we've found that people will fork over the big bucks for a more private experience."

What would it be like to have fun with her, Finn wondered. To party with her? How exactly does one "party" these days?

"It must have taken all your savings to open up something like that," Finn commented.

Rose chewed at her bottom lip for a moment, the skin between her brows pinching as if she were weighing how much to divulge. "Yeah… well, Paige and I actually didn't have to drain our bank accounts... or get a loan." Her pause was short, but even her slight hesitation confused Finn. "We didn't need to get into debt at all, actually. Um… Ben gave us all the money we needed, only letting us put in a bit of our own. Really, he could own the whole thing if he wanted, but he signed as a co-owner. He even let us make most of the decisions on how to operate, giving us full power on the renovation and decorating. It was very..."

"Nice of him," Finn finished for her.

She looked down at her lap, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Yeah," she breathed out. "Nice of him."

Finn wasn't close to Ben, not by a long shot. And from what Rey had told him, this Ben wasn't exactly like her Ben. Her Ben had been kind and considerate and protective, even if things had been rocky between them in the beginning of their marriage. However, this Ben was an asshole – by Finn's judgment – but had, in Rey's opinion, a soft heart underneath a rough exterior.

At least the guy didn't speak to him, choosing to only really converse with Rey and Rose, which was fine with him. Finn would rather be ignored by the guy than be in the path of his ire again. Being mind manipulated – having his body and thoughts being dictated from a verbal command – had been disconcerting.

To add to that bewildering experience, when he had reported back to his superior about it, there wasn't even the slightest hint of confusion, nor a follow up question about it. It was like Phasma had expected it. Like she already knew the guy had abilities. But Celestials who came down to earth for their trial of mortality shouldn't have access to that divine side of themselves. They were human in every sense of the word, because in order to understand the beings they governed over, they were required to become them for a time.

Something must have gotten out of whack when Ben died and was reborn. There was no expectation on what could happen in a scenario like that, because there had never been a Celestial who died during their trial. Sure, they were vulnerable to being hurt and technically could die, but something about their innate divinity gave them a protective barrier against harm. Like a deific shield that defended their fate from taking a vicious blow.

Ben's death had been an anomaly. It shouldn't have been possible. Same could be said for Rey. But unlike Ben, there was maybe more of an explanation as to how Rey's fate ended tragically. It all had to do with a rumor, one that had been circulating for decades. One that unfolded the horrible maybe-truth that Leia could have intervened with Rey's execution, but had done nothing to stop it. It was said that she even pushed it forward.

Finn knew House Organa blamed Rey for Ben's death, so he figured there was probably more truth to that form of gossip than the other Emissaries realized. Still, he kept his mouth shut, both from his fellow Emissaries and Rey. If he didn't partake in the conversation, it was easier to believe it wasn't true.

"Ben really gave you complete control? Over everything?" Finn asked, finding it hard to believe Ben would do such a thing.

Rose shrugged. "Basically. Paige and I always wanted to go into business doing something together. When we were younger, our dream was a restaurant, even though we were shit at cooking." Finn chuckled through his nose. "But as we got older, we were also interested in a club. We ended up fusing the two together. Ben thought it was a great idea the first time we pitched it to him."

Finn tilted his head slightly to the side, sitting back in the chair. "No offense, but Ben doesn't seem like the type of person who would just give up control over something he put a lot of money in."

"Oh, he's not. But we've been really good friends for a long time now… since we were young. So there's already a good amount of trust between us."

"How did you become friends with him? Isn't he, like, six years older than you?"

Stare shifting to the side, Rose said, "Well… he saved my life."

Finn waited for her to elaborate. She didn't. "Like you were hit by a car and he saw it, or…." The way her back tensed and jaw tightened was obvious, prompting Finn to back off. "Sorry, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. It's totally none of my business."

She shook her head. "I don't mind. I mean"–she flicked her long ponytail off her shoulder and onto her back–"I can talk about it. It just usually makes the listener uncomfortable."

Their gazes locked. Finn swallowed. "I'm fine if you are."

Curse him, but he really wanted to know.

Rose nodded, taking in a long breath, relaxing more into her chair as if preparing for a long tale. "So… I have gotten to a place where I can talk about it. Really, I have. The memory of it doesn't control me anymore, and the dreams have pretty much gone away. Therapy can do wonders, I guess." She chuckled lightly, then got serious. "I was taken when I was nine by this man I didn't know." A jolt of shock went through Finn. "I was playing near my house and wasn't paying attention to this car that pulled up alongside the curb." Her brows drew together, hand motioning to her head. "Things are fuzzy from there. He grabbed me and I hit my head pretty hard on the car as he was getting me inside. When I woke up, I was in a basement, unfinished, parts of the floor covered with cement, other parts dirt. It was cold and damp and smelled foul."

Finn's chest tightened into a knot like a cramp, a quiet rage building inside.

He was about to tell her to stop, that she didn't need to tell him any more. But she just kept on going, and Finn didn't have the wherewithal to interrupt her. "I was tied to a pillar and couldn't get out. I was kept like that for three days. Unless he gave me a bathroom break, and believe me, the thought of trying to run or fight back always crossed my mind. But I was a small kid and he was huge and I knew that would be a waste of time." The corner of her lip ticked upwards, and not in a humorous way. More like… a sinister pride. "I bit him, though... when he fed me some crackers. Made him bleed. He kicked me in the stomach for that, but it was worth it to hurt him."

Rose's stare shifted to the side, gaze far away, as if viewing the memory. "The things he told me… about what he'd done to other girls… what he would do to me…." She blinked quickly, eyes forming a glossy shine. "I won't get into that stuff. No one needs to hear that." Rose cleared her throat, rubbing at the back of her neck. "Anyway, on the third day I noticed a shadow covering the little window in the top corner. It was Ben. He broke in, got me out, and we went to the neighbors house to call the police."

The burn in Finn's palms was thinly noticed, the hard clench of his fists pushing his fingernails into his skin. He only became aware of how rooted his jaw was once he pushed himself to say something. "I hope the man is rotting in prison."

"He actually killed himself when the police arrived."

"Then he's rotting in hell." Finn knew that for a fact, given the man's actions. "Even better."

There was a specific place for those souls who'd done monstrous deeds: Abaddon, the realm that Allister Snoke abided over. It was not specifically Hell, for a soul would have to be judged by God to be sent there. Rather, it was a holding place for the wicked until their hour of judgment, at which time they would pass through the Shroud, the entrance that gave a soul access to the Ether.

The Ether… well, no one knew exactly what it was like. God and Heaven and Hell were all there, but only deceased souls were allowed to enter when it was their time to do so. No one came back. Not to Finn's knowledge, anyway. Finn didn't even know what the inside of Abaddon or the Waypoint looked like. Emissaries weren't allowed to enter.

"After all that," Rose began to say, "I was kind of attached to Ben, but he didn't seem to mind. He didn't have any friends, and we seemed to understand each other pretty well. Throughout the years, we would go a while without staying in touch, but we always found a way to reconnect. Or he would come rescue me again when I needed it… and there was this time in my life after high school where I–"

The back door swung open, hitting the wall and banging back into place with a clap and a bounce. Both Finn and Rose jumped at the sudden noise, heads turning to see Rey hurrying their way. The closer she got, the more apparent it became that she had run back to the theatre: hair windswept behind her, jacket having slipped off one shoulder, skinny jeans scrunching up above her ankles and creasing around her knees. But even more odd was that she was breathing hard. With Rey's frozen-in-time disposition, physical exertion didn't affect her. Only her emotions could change her bodily functions, and Finn would know – he had comforted her through a lot of panic attacks during the years, usually when the memories of Ben became too much for her to handle.

Rey stopped in front of them, taking in a deep breath, eyes bouncing between the pair. "Hey Rose. Finn." There was a second of an awkward pause, Rey looking like she had no idea what to say next. Then: "How's it going?"

"Good," Rose replied. Giving Rey a once over, concern bloomed into Rose's features. "How are you doing? Are you okay?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm great. Doing good, you know. Just living life." Rey was overselling it, which meant she was lying. "Could I… would you mind if I just talk to Finn for a second?"

Instant annoyance came upon Finn, followed swiftly by guilt for feeling that way. Clearly Rey was stressed about something, and as her friend, he should want to help. But cutting his time off with Rose, just as they were really getting deep in conversation, involuntarily frustrated him. He couldn't help it.

Finn looked to Rose, heart dropping as she stood and grabbed her backpack off the floor. "Yeah, of course, not a problem. I told Rachel I'd run lines with her at some point today, anyway." She locked eyes with Finn, a thousand words seeming to be restrained behind her stare. "I'll be up front," she said, settling on those four simple words.

She gave them both a small wave and made quick on her exit.

Finn felt like a part of him left the room with her.

Finn stood, facing Rey head on. "Rey, what is–"

"I saw you. I mean, I saw one of you," she amended as she stepped closer to him, lowering her voice. "A Reaper. A Reaper who isn't you."

His frustration vanished, not even lingering as an afterthought. Other Emissaries were forbidden from making themselves known to Rey.

Head flinching back slightly, Finn said, "Like, you saw them across the street, or–"

"No, I bumped into her and then she started talking to me." It was then he noticed Rey trembling, her hands tucked in her armpits, the slightest bead of sweat on her forehead. "Finn… she knows that you're here. That you're in the play and the way she said it… I don't know, it was almost like a threat or something and what if you get in trouble and you're sent away and–"

"Hey, hey, hey," he muttered, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Nothing is going to happen to me."

"But she knows!" Rey blurted out, causing Finn to shush her in fear anyone would hear them.

He ushered her quickly to a back corner of the warehouse, providing them privacy behind storage shelves.

"Finn–"

"I'll take care of it, okay? All I gotta do is probably work some of her shifts and bribe her a little so she won't say anything. That's probably what she's after." Finn actually didn't know what the Emissary wanted, but seeing how Rey was close to losing it, he had to tell her something.

There was the notable swoosh of the double doors opening that connected the small part of backstage to the warehouse, a feminine voice cursing up a storm. It was Jenna, which didn't surprise Finn.

Rey kept her voice low. "I can give you some of my money so you can maybe pay her off and–"

Finn shook his head. "Most Emissaries have no interest in money, but thanks, peanut."

"So… you're going to be fine? You're sure you can find the Reaper who talked to me and she'll keep your secret?"

"What did she look like?"

Rey held her hand high, even going on her toes. "Tall. Like, towering tall, more than Ben is." She touched her hair next, as if providing these gestures would help Finn figure out who the woman was. "Short blonde hair, pale skin, blue eyes."

Phasma.

Shit.

She was his direct superior, the Emissary he reported to.

"Yeah, I know her," said Finn.

"You do?"

"There aren't many Emissaries that are that tall." He nodded slowly as he worked through all the other Emissaried he knew. It had to be her. "I can speak with her and smooth everything over." For a cost, he mentally added. There was no way Phasma bumping into Rey and bringing Finn into the conversation was a coincidence. The woman wanted something.

Finn was expecting Rey to demand a name, to know exactly who the Emissary was and to give more details about her.

Instead, she hugged him without hesitation, catching him by surprise. "I don't want anything to happen to you," she whispered against his chest.

Sometimes, it worried Finn how much Rey trusted him. That she didn't ask many questions or probe for answers. Upon their first meeting, he had told her he wasn't allowed to divulge much about what he did. For the most part, she just accepted that… because she had needed a friend so badly. Wanted a connection to someone. Yearned to trust that he had good intentions.

Finn did have good intentions… but he was also beholden to his job.

As he held her, comforting her, he wondered if there was a small part of Rey that suspected there was more to him staying with her other than their friendship. That most of the secrets he kept from her pertained to her.

In spite of the reality of his own situation and the overriding focus it demanded, it was more important to assuage Rey's anxiety… by lying. "Nothing will happen to me," Finn told her. "I promise. I know how to handle this."

Except he didn't.

What the hell was Phasma playing at by talking to Rey?

He had told no one about being involved with the theatre. If an Emissary knew, it meant that he was being watched. But he technically wasn't breaking the rules. He'd been strictly commanded to be with Rey as much as possible in order to keep an eye on her. Since Rey was at the theatre, he had to be as well. However, going as far as being in the play might be seen as being too immersed in the human world. It could cause trouble.

Finn was aware of a tightness growing in his chest, even as Rey appeared to have calmed and broke away from the embrace. She was saying something about a sandwich she needed to give to Ben, and Finn hoped his smile was convincing that he was fine, because his mind was a million miles away, wondering what the future held for him.

Future. It was a peculiar word for him to hold onto. His life was made to be a Reaper and that was it.

Humans got to live, and Reapers were meant to serve.

But, tucked away in a little pocket of his heart, he wanted more.

Finn was stubborn and he was loyal and at times he liked to dream – dream about life as a human that had him aging with someone he loved, that moved him forward instead of remaining like… this.

But life tended to have corrections for those that dreamed. Mostly in the form of consequences.

Those feelings that were bubbling up to the surface caused him to recall a memory, one that might be more significant than he initially thought so at the time.

()()()()()

8 years ago…

Between two closely situated American elm trees, Finn stepped out of the foreportal. The light from earlier had now faded, Central Park becoming ever more silvery as the moonlight outlined the shadows that stretched over the landscape. The warmth of the autumn day was quite gone, only ever present in the sunshine, and the first bites of winter making an appearance during the night.

A twig snapped under Finn's weight as he moved further into the world of the living. The particular area he came back to was dense and off any visible pathways, making it less noticeable by humans. He glanced back, nothing giving the foreportal away by sight, but an energy that drew him in. Even if humans came upon it, they would be none the wiser.

Finn breathed in, detecting a smoky fragrance in the night air. He searched for the source among the shadows.

A small glowing tip of a cigarette caught his attention. Phasma leaned against a nearby tree, taking a deep drag, getting her fix of nicotine. She watched him unblinkingly, the smoke she expelled hitching a ride on her question. "How'd it go?"

"Good. Drop off was easy."

"The Waypoint?"

"Yep."

She nodded. "Good." Her eyes looked past him to the portal, her hand with the cig stopping halfway to her mouth. "Good," she repeated. "Kids… they shouldn't have to go to Abaddon." With the coffin nail back between her lips, she finished it off, only to ignite another.

Finn frowned with confusion at what she said.

Kids younger than ten were never taken to Abaddon, no matter what kind of life they had led. It took time for humans to learn what right and wrong truly were. God granted mercy on those first years of their lives as they figured it out.

Phasma knew that. Everyone in the divine community knew that. But for some reason, one that Finn couldn't calculate, Phasma seemed to be waiting for an exception to be made or the rule to be changed.

So far, protocol had remained the same since Finn came into existence as a Reaper. If it had changed, if the age had been lowered, Finn wasn't sure if he would keep helping Phasma. The main reason? Delivering souls to the entrance of Abaddon always filled Finn's stomach with a pit of dread. The place was devoid of life, with dark rocky caverns covered in a thick soot, the kind of dust that you'd find on the moon. Talk about having a coughing fit every time he visited, that shit got everywhere: his hair, clothes, eyes, lungs. A shower and a change in clothes were always needed after a visit.

Phasma blew out another cloud of smoke, flicking the ashes to the ground. "How did it… how did the girl…"

"Die?" Finn finished for her.

Phasma nodded, shoulders tensing for the answer.

"You really want to know?" asked Finn. Phasma glanced away. "Because it's not pleasant. And the last time I told you how it happened, you nearly killed the man who was behind it."

She pegged him with a hard stare. "That was fifteen years ago."

Finn sighed, relieving some of the pressure in his chest that always accrued whenever he was around this particular Emissary. "Look… I'm not going to tell you. And I don't think you actually want to know. If you did, you could easily find out if you looked into it." Phasma stared at him steadily. She gave no rebuttal, because they both knew he was right.

It had taken years, but Finn was getting better at reading Phasma and picking up on her emotional cues. Seeing how he reported to her about Rey, Finn saw her more often than his other co-workers. On those occasions, Phasma was less than cordial. Not even professional. He would describe her as being spiteful, impatient, and unapproachable. And she would always try to goad him into anger. Comments about his appearance – "That suit is starting to look tight on you" – or tactless remarks about Rey – "If I were her, I would've found a way to off myself by now" – made it difficult to put up with her. In her own way, Phasma was a ruthless, blond monster. But Finn didn't like to see anyone suffer. Even monsters. Which was why whenever Phasma was assigned a child's soul to find, Finn worked the case. He saw first hand what those assignments had done to her.

Guess even monsters had a sliver of a heart.

When the awkward silence became too much, he figured he'd throw both of them a lifeline and be the one to leave. "Okay…. Well, you know how to find me if you get another assignment involving a kid. See ya around, I guess."

He got five steps in before she called out to him. "Hey, Finn." He stopped and turned back to face her. "I don't like you."

"Wow," he deadpanned. "This is breaking news."

"No one likes you."

His laugh was more of a snort. "I'm shocked. Truly."

"It's not personal, really… it's not because of your personality or anything."

"It's because of Rey. I'm not an idiot, you know."

Phasma's features tightened with frustration. "Well, what do you expect to happen when you go and create this job for yourself as a glorified babysitter–"

"I did not come up with the idea of keeping an eye on Rey. I was ordered to."

Phasma snorted derisively as she dropped the cigarette to the ground, pushing it into the dirt with the toe of her boot. "After you explicitly ignored House Organa commanding no one go near the girl. But you did. And then you get rewarded for it by getting your assignments more than cut in half just so you can follow her around. Your workload is nothing compared to what the rest of us have to deal with."

Finn rolled his eyes. "Maybe if you had approached Rey when she was wearing rags, covered in filth and living in the woods, you'd be in my position. But you didn't. None of you did. You all passed her by and didn't give a shit."

"That's not fair and you know it," her rising voice cut through the still air. "It was an order, Finn – an order not to go near her and yet you–." Phasma stopped, closing her mouth, fists clenched at her sides as she wrangled in a small sense of control.

Finn shook his head and closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Yeah, I'm getting tired of having the same argument every few months, too."

Phasma shook her head. "Believe it or not, I didn't bring this up to argue with you." Finn was leaning more toward the not option. "I just… even though I don't like you, you do help me out. I nearly killed that human for what he did to his niece, but you stopped me. The consequences that would've brought me for even hurting a human…. I'm glad it didn't get to that point. And now the fact that you take some of my assignments, the ones that involve children…. I guess what I'm trying to say is that–" She swallowed, like she was about to be sick. Clearing her throat a few times, she finally managed to spit out, "I appreciate the help you've given me. And… and I owe you for it."

"You don't–"

"I do," she said staunchly. "Which is why I'm giving you this warning: Things are starting to change around here, and when they do, you're going to want to be on the right side."

Eyeing her with caution, Finn said, "Change? What's changing?"

"I can't get into specifics. I shouldn't have even told you that much. But, as I said, I owe you." She pointed her finger at him sharply, voice stern. "But now we're even. If I get any more assignments involving a young soul, I'll deal with it myself."

Finn could see it instantly in Phasma, the way she delivered that last sentence through tight lips, her features having a hard time from keeping her anxiety from showing. Her fear. And dammit, Finn felt for her.

Stupid empathy.

He rolled his eyes at himself and said, "I can still take those cases for you–"

"No," she cut him off quickly. "I don't like feeling in debt to anyone."

Finn didn't push her on it. He gave her two months tops before she asked him for his help again.

Before Phasma fully turned away from him to leave, Finn asked, "How would I even know what the right side is, anyway?"

"It'll be where I am, of course," she answered as if it were obvious.

Finn felt like he was on the verge of a headache with how hard his eyes rolled.

A bit of satisfaction played across Phasmas face at knowing she was irritating him. "Before we part ways, because I know you probably want to get the fuck away from me, I need to report back on how it's going with getting Rey to move to LA?"

Finn glanced at the watch on his left wrist. He needed to head back to the apartment if he were to get dinner ready at a reasonable time. "She refuses to leave the East Coast."

"It's not like this area is anymore special than the West."

"It is to her. Her memories of Ben are tied here. Getting her to leave is impossible." And Finn was so very tired of trying to convince her to move. At this point, he felt like he would have better luck getting a tree stump to pluck up its roots and go to California.

"Well, maybe they'll figure out a way to get him to come to her," Phasma suggested. "Apparently House Organa wants them to meet soon and see what happens. Hopefully Rey doesn't kill him again."

Back to the good ol' Phasma he knew. And just like that, Finn's empathy was gone. "Rey didn't kill him. She wasn't even there."

Phasma looked to be indifferent to Finn's retort. "There or not, she's viewed as being responsible for what happened, regardless. And I heard the only reason Leia didn't tear that girl apart was because House Kenobi stepped in and made some sort of deal with her – which must have been a shit deal, considering what happened to Satine."

Finn's heart clenched at the mention of Rey's mother. Stories still circulated about what happened to her after the whole Ben and Rey fiasco, and if they were true… Finn didn't have it in him to tell Rey that she would never see her mother again.

"I don't take stock in rumors," Finn told her. "And none of you should, either."

"Okay, Mr. Self-righteous," Phasma sneered. "How else are we supposed to get through doing the same shit everyday for hundreds of years on end without going crazy? We all talk about Rey and Ben and the Celestial Houses because it's entertainment; it's something to take our minds off of the fact that all we were made for was to serve and round up lost souls." She was looking at Finn like she expected him to add something to her rant, but he didn't know what to say.

Phasma let out a long breath, hands going to her hips, voice just a bit softer. "I mean, doesn't it get to you?"

Finn swallowed back the lump in his throat. "What do you mean?" But he knew what she meant. He just didn't want to face it.

"That our very existence is to do this and only this. That the world will always be right out of our reach. That we have to see the side effects of the very worst of humanity – having souls beg us for just a bit more time, that they could say goodbye to their loved ones or get revenge on the person who cut their life short." Her voice broke on the last syllable, and Finn could see the pain that was hidden beneath her indignation. He could see it glossing her eyes. "I'm so fucking sick of the dead whining and begging and screaming about how unfair it all is! And then you have the children crying and calling out for their mothers…." She bit her bottom lip, unable to continue that sentence.

Shoulders slumping, Phasma's gaze went to the ground. "Were we always made to be Reapers? Or were we something else? Could we be something else?"

Finn only knew one way to answer those questions: by reiterating what they've always been told. "This is what we were made for."

She gave him a frustrated shake of her head. "I don't think that's true. There has to be more to it." Turning to leave, she added, "There has to be."

The thing was… Finn felt the exact same way.

A/N

Since some things were established during this chapter, I'm going to have an overview at the end of each chapter so you can better understand what certain realms/worldbuilding aspects are. This is a basic explanation below, and will be added to as more info comes out in the chapters.

Overview–

Abaddon: a holding place for the wicked and evil spirits of the world, looked over by Allister Snoke. It is a dark and gloomy place, covered in high rock columns, caverns, and thick dust. Once a soul's time of judgment comes, they pass through the Shroud to enter the Ether, a dimension where God dwells, and Heaven and Hell are located.

The Waypoint: a holding place for the good and upstanding souls of the world, looked over by House Kenobi. It is covered in greenery and warmth. Once a soul's time of judgment comes, they pass through the Shroud to enter the Ether, a dimension where God dwells and where Heaven and Hell are located.

The Shroud: the entrance to the Ether. Only deceased souls can pass through when it is their time to do so.

The Ether: a dimension beyond the Shroud, it is comprised of Heaven and Hell. After entering the Ether, the soul is judged by God.