Waking up was like trying to swim with weights on her ankle. That is to say, it was exhausting. Solea neared the surface of consciousness a few times, floating at the edge where light filtered brightly and she could hear the faint voices of people around her but then the weights pulled her back down as her body fell victim to fatigue.
During the times she was lost in the lightless depths, the Fade conjured up memories of her family, dreams that for once, she had no control of. She dreamt of sitting in her father's lap as a small child, her clumsy infant fingers tracing the lines of lyrium that marked his tan skin. She looked up at him in wide eyed wonder and he smiled warmly back at her, eyes bright with emotion.
It had been a favorite pastime of hers as a child, she'd tug insistently at his shirt until he took it off so she could trace his markings, marvel at them. She'd always been fascinated by them. It was only much later in her life that she learnt that she was the only one besides her mom that he willingly let do so and why.
She dreamt of the night her parents sent her out of Kirkwall and to the Dalish clan outside the city walls. She remembered stumbling through the dark alleyways of the city, following behind Merrill and clinging to Varric's coat sleeve as she cried. She'd wanted to wail her anguish for all the city to hear. It was their fault she couldn't be a normal kid, their fault she couldn't grow up with her parents, their fault for shoving her mother onto a pedestal, making her both Champion and a target.
Despite her violent rage at the city and sorrow for her fate, Solea kept dutifully quiet. Don't be heard, don't be seen, you must be invisible, a passing shadow to others. This was the mantra she'd been raised on and she knew better to raise attention to herself. No one could know she existed, it was safer that way, for everyone. By the time, they caught sight of the first aravel, her eyes were dry and her face blank.
What followed that was a stream of various snapshots of her life growing up. Days spent with Varric out in the forest, challenging each other to archery contests. Nights spent dueling her mother by torchlight or studying with Keeper Marethari about the ways of the Dalish and magic. Laughing wildly as her father tossed her on his shoulders and ran around while she clung to his shock white hair. Though happy, the memories were tinged with the sour taste of her guilt at disobeying her parents and leaving.
When she finally broke free of the surface, Solea lurched upwards, gasping for air. A loud clattering noise drew her attention to an elvish woman who was frozen and staring at her with terror in her eyes and a broken box at her feet. Frantically, Solea looked down at herself but she wasn't glowing.
"Oh! I didn't know you were awake, I swear!" The young woman stuttered.
"It's fine, but where exactly am I? What happened?" Solea cast her gaze about the small cabin as she spoke but found no clues to tell her where she was.
Instead of answering, the woman threw herself at the ground, prostrating herself submissively as she pleaded, "I beg your forgiveness and your blessing. I am but a humble servant." When she got no response to this, the elf continued on hastily. "You're back in Haven, my lady. They say you saved us. The breach stopped growing, just like the mark on your hand. It's all anyone has talked about for the last three days!"
Solea's growing dread that the woman's deference meant they'd discovered who her parents were was diminished against the news about her mark. She peered down at her hand, thankfully still covered in a glove, and cast her magic carefully out. Probing gently, she discovered that her mark had indeed ceased creeping up her arm. The pain had stopped as well, she realized with relief, recalling the journey to the Breach.
The closer they'd gotten to the Temple of Sacred Ashes, the harder she had to focus on staying in control. Solea felt the weakness of the Veil as they neared the epicenter of the chaos, felt the barrier separating worlds grow paper thin. The temptation to just slip through and disappear pulled at the lines of her body and she had to keep most of her attention on fighting the urge, which severely crippled her fighting abilities.
The good news was when she finally stepped into the Temple interior, that temptation disappeared. The bad news was that it only happened because her mark had erupted into flashing white hot pain as the magic within responded to her proximity to the Breach. She could feel the mark spreading as the magic fought against her for more space on her body.
Then, she'd tried to close the rift at the Breach and that, that had made the previous pain feel irrelevant. It had felt like every cell in her arm was splitting apart and she thought her arm might actually tear apart. Even the memory of it made Solea clench her hand reflexively.
Shaking away her thoughts, Solea realized the elf was staring at her expectantly as if waiting for her to say something. She wasn't sure what to say but she knew she needed to figure out if anything had been discovered about her while she'd been unconscious for three whole days. She hoped her current covered state meant Varric had been able to keep them from undressing her in their attempts at healing.
"What you said earlier, does that mean…" she recalled the vicious, hateful glares and slurs that had been flung at her as she followed behind the Seeker in chains. "are people pleased? What about the Seeker?"
The woman froze again in fear. Solea wished she'd stop doing that. "Oh my! Lady Cassandra will want to know you've wakened. She said 'at once'! She's in the Chantry with the Lord Chancellor. 'At once' she said!" Without another word, she scurried out of the cabin like it was on fire, letting in a sudden gust of cold and a glimpse of snowy banks before the door slammed shut behind her.
Solea sighed into the empty space. She didn't like the picture the elf had painted of the situation waiting for her. Thankfully, it sounded like the Breach was closed which meant all she had to do was grab Varric and the two of them could slip out of Haven undetected. Her hopes of discretion were dashed the moment she stepped out the cabin door. Dazzling sunlight reflecting off snow blinded her momentarily but the moment her eyes adjusted, she dropped into a crouch, tensing as she reached instinctively for her daggers, which she didn't have.
There were people everywhere. Soldiers lined the path from the door, and more civilians crowded around behind them. And they were all staring at her. No one moved or spoke, they were just staring and slowly, as nothing happened, the fear clouding her mind dissipated. Now she could see that there was only about a hundred people, not the many hundreds they had initially seemed like. The men in armor were not templars, just normal soldiers. They were even saluting her, with fists clenched at their chests.
What the hell was she supposed to do now? She hadn't planned on going anywhere near Chantry and certainly didn't want to have any more conversations with the Seeker, but she didn't appear to have any other options. She started down the pathway stiffly, taking care to stay directly in the middle and maintain as much space as possible between her and the soldiers on either side. All of them seemed to tower over her small frame and she'd never felt so short nor so aware of her age.
The entire pathway to the Chantry was lined and as she passed people she caught snippets of conversations and whispers from the crowd. The called her the Herald of Andraste, muttered various Andrastian blessings at her, and she had to bite back the urge to scream at them to shut up. She was no blessed idol. Creators, she wasn't even religious.
Frustration burned in her gut and her patience was fleeting by the time she reached the massive wooden doors of the Chantry. She was on edge around so many people, tense from constantly scanning the faces around her for threats and innately uncomfortable at having so many people focused on her. Her whole life had been centered around avoiding attention, and this blatant fixation on her was unnerving. She never thought she'd miss being on the run.
The reverent quiet of the Chantry interior was soothing on her frayed nerves and Solea fell back against the doors in relief, closing her eyes. She inhaled the faint scent of wood from the solid surface at her spine. After several deep meditative breaths, Solea felt her calm, along with her control, return and she stepped away from the door.
She was drawn down the hall towards the cacophony of voices that leaked out from behind the shut door at the end of the hall. Clearly there was an argument going on and as she approached she recognized the Seeker's voice along with the faintly Orlesian accent of the redhead, Leliana. The male voice was as familiar as its scorn for her as it argued for Solea's arrest. Chancellor Roderick, of course. He was clearly not pleased with her current status as a non-prisoner.
Solea hesitated outside the door. It wasn't too late, she thought, she could still turn around and leave. She remembered the crowds of people outside and thought of the guards she'd seen posted at the gate out of Haven. There wasn't going to be an easy exit right now. Her best move was to wait for a better opportunity to present itself; for now, she would brave the situation on the other side of the door.
Decided, she pushed open the door cautiously and the first thing she saw was Leliana and the Seeker standing next to each other beside a large wood table that took up most of the room. At the end of the table, Chancellor Roderick turned to face her, is face bright red as he demanded that the guards, stationed on either side of the doorway, arrest her immediately. Solea dropped straight into a crouch, and yet again grabbed for weapons that she didn't have but before she could make a move, the commanding tone of the Seeker rang out.
"Disregard that, and leave us."
Solea immediately dodged far away from the guards who were decked in Templar armor, easily identifiable by the giant sword emblem on the breastplate. Though she couldn't sense any lyrium in their blood, her heart still raced and she didn't breathe again until the door had shut firmly behind the guards who clearly cared more about the Seeker's authority than the Chancellor's. She felt less on edge with the Chantry guards gone, but Solea still stayed close to the door, ready to escape should the need arise.
Tuning back in to the ongoing argument, Solea caught Leliana's curious gaze focused on her. There was a sharp intellect in the woman's eyes that made her uneasy and something told Solea that not only had Leliana noticed her reaction to the guards but that she was analyzing every bit of it as well. Her first instinct was to avert her eyes, avoid attention, but her frustration from earlier had not entirely abated and so she glared back challengingly while noting mentally to keep an eye on the redhead.
Eyes glittering, Leliana broke away first, interjecting into the conversation that Solea realized she should probably pay attention to considering they were talking about her. "Someone was behind the explosion at the Conclave. Someone Most Holy did not expect. Perhaps they died with the others - or have allies who yet live." At this, Leliana looked pointedly at the Chancellor who looked aghast.
"I am a suspect? But not the prisoner?"
"I heard the voices in the temple." Cassandra argued. "The Divine called to her for help."
Chancellor Roderick scoffed. "So her survival, that thing on her hand, is all a coincidence?"
Cassandra shook her head. "Providence. The Maker sent her to us in our darkest hour."
Solea laughed out loud, startling everyone in the room who turned to her in surprise. She looked at the Seeker incredulously, "You think your beloved Maker sent me, an elven child, to be your savior?" She chuckled again and remembering the importance of her cover story, added a mumbled. "You shem really are crazy."
"I will not pretend to understand the will of the Maker but you are exactly what we needed when we needed it." The resolute faith in the coal dark of the Seeker's eyes mirrored the steel in her voice it sent shivers down Solea's spine.
