Much to Catherine's astonishment, Jimmy was in bed by the time she crept back into the house sometime after midnight. She was transported back to 1998, sneaking around in the dark as quiet as could be, hoping no one was up and waiting to catch her in the act of breaking curfew.
Ditching her shoes, purse, and keys by the front door, Catherine tip-toed down the hall. She thought about just taking a shower in the guest bathroom as to not disturb Jimmy, but that idea was shot to shit when she remembered all of her stuff was in the master bath.
Gently pushing the bedroom door open, Catherine popped her head in and held her breath. Only when she heard the soft hum of Jimmy's snoring over the air conditioner, did she know it was safe to proceed. She fumbled in the dark, snatching her pajamas off the floor near her side of the bed, and a clean pair of panties from her duffel, before making a mad dash for the bathroom.
Once inside, with the door closed behind her, Catherine flipped on the light. Catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror, she leaned against the door and only shook her head. She kept wondering when the guilt of her indiscretions would settle, but it never came. As she played the events of the last hour over again, it only made her feel as though she had nothing to be guilty for. If Jimmy had absolutely no intention of making an honest woman of her, she was just as free as he was to screw around with whoever she pleased.
Letting out the breath she didn't realize she had been holding, Catherine headed for the bathtub longing for a hot soak to relieve the tension knotting her muscles. She twisted the taps and didn't set the plug until the water was hot enough to turn her skin pink. Just as her hands darted to the button of her jeans, the tight grip that curled around her wrists made her jump in fright.
"Fuck, Jimmy." Catherine sank back into his body, pleased and nervous that it was him. "Scared me half ta death, so ya did."
Jimmy released Catherine's wrists and proceeded to undo the button for her. He slowly pulled down the fly as his lips glued themselves to the small sensitive spot just below her ear lobe. There was no way he didn't smell the pub on her, and Catherine prayed like hell that would go overlooked.
"Everythin' okay?"
She nodded, closing her eyes, just enjoying the rare tenderness as he carefully undressed her. Seemingly he believed her lie, and she wasn't sure just exactly how much she should say. If she let out too much information or not enough, he may question her believability.
"Jus' wanted ta go over numbers again. He said they'll have an answer fer us the day after next."
After dropping her bra to the floor, Jimmy nuzzled the curve of her neck, tantalized by the perfume that still lingered on her skin. He had bought it for her when she accompanied him on a trip to Paris. There was something he was searching for, and much to Jimmy's dismay, he found it. There was one scent the perfume couldn't hide and that was familiar muskiness of sex. He could detect it every time she had slept with Lorcan, and there it was, once again, teasing him as it radiated from her pores.
There was only one person Jimmy blamed for her behavior; himself. He had made the mistake of turning a blind eye when Catherine had boldly begun sleeping with Lorcan. It was painfully clear she had only been doing it as a tactic to make Jimmy jealous and to some extent, it worked. When that relationship finally ended, he had assumed so did the sex with other men. He hadn't told her that she would never belong to anyone else ever again. Never in his life did Jimmy think Catherine could ask so foolishly in the span of only forty-eight hours. He let her have too much freedom and that was all about to change. It killed him to think about what had to be done, but he was not going to allow any bitch, especially not one nearly two decades his junior, make him look like a fool.
Reaching down, Jimmy turned off the water once the tub was full. "Get in."
She did just that without question. Closing her eyes, Catherine sank into the water and a chill spread throughout her body. It was absolute heaven; the only thing that would make it even more perfect was if Jimmy joined her.
Now was the time the guilt of her romp with Happy, began to weigh heavy on her soul. She had been expecting a screaming match—maybe a few punches—upon her arrival home. Not the soft side of Jimmy, which hardly ever made an appearance.
Her eyes jerked open when she felt Jimmy's fingers run along her collarbones. He was sitting on the floor beside the tub and she couldn't help but notice how exhausted he looked. Those light blue eyes were heavy, with dark circles popping from beneath his tanned skin. Catherine removed a hand from the water and rubbed her fingers along the slight bruising on his cheekbone from when she had elbowed him in the face during their last scuffle.
Jimmy held out his left hand, a black velvet box resting in his palm. It wasn't unusual for him to buy her gifts, but considering their last several interactions, it nonetheless took her by surprise.
"Open it," he said.
Eagerly, Catherine scooted herself up and water sloughed around her. Her face lit up with a thousand emotions when she opened the box, but what made Jimmy smile was her pure gratitude and happiness. Inside sat a white gold Claddagh ring, with a sapphire heart.
"Jesus," she gasped.
Jimmy pulled the ring from the box and reached for her right hand, slipping it on her third finger. "Ya like it?"
"I love it! I can't thank ye enough."
Holding her hand out in front of her, she rolled her bottom lip between her teeth when she realized which direction the heart was facing. Inward, towards her own heart, and it brought a bright smile to her face. Jimmy ran a hand through her hair, entangling his fingers in her locks when she turned to face him.
"I love ya, a chuisle, but things are complicated right now an' ye know that. Once I'm on the Council, it'll be just us."
"Aye, I know."
She more than understood why he was so hesitant to shake up his personal life at the moment. Currently in the process of pushing to take over the vacant Quartermaster General position on the Army Council, meant Jimmy had many scrutinizing eyes on him. Although, to Catherine, their sneaking around looked far worse than if he were to just leave Fiona. It had been years since they bothered hiding their relationship, and it was Belfast's most notorious open secret.
Jimmy cupped her cheeks in both his hands as he brought his mouth to hers for a searing kiss. With that ring now on her finger, she would have a reminder as to what she meant to him. Maybe he truly was trying to turn over a new leaf, and Catherine hated herself for not believing him and running off to another man.
When the kiss broke and she looked into his eyes, there was no missing the storm of indignation. At that moment, Catherine understood that Jimmy knew she'd slept with a Son.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered.
Before Catherine had a chance to realize what he meant, Jimmy tightly grabbed her neck in both hands. She screamed and fought him; scratching at his cheek and her fist connected with his temple. His warning from the other night echoed loudly in her ears, and Catherine convinced herself he somehow found out Chibs had been at the pub with her. With all her might, she resisted him, using every ounce of energy she had to break free of his grip. She came to find that the more she struggled, the harder he pushed down on her windpipe. No matter how much she tried to relax, thinking if she stopped fighting back he would have mercy on her, Catherine only grew more agitated as she fought to breathe.
Those jabs weren't enough to faze Jimmy. She eventually lost the battle and he shoved her under the water.
His lips pursed and his heart pounded so hard it almost exploded in his chest. Not caring that he was dressed, Jimmy vaulted into the tub, straddling her body in the small space. Beneath him, Catherine jerked, tossed, and twisted. Her muffled cries faded as she began to inhale water. As bubbles started to rise on the surface, Jimmy pushed down on her neck, even more, feeling the tight ridges of her trachea beneath his thumbs. Catherine wasn't aware that he had no intention of keeping her under long enough for her to meet her maker, and the reason his thumbs bit painfully into her airway was to close it just enough, so she inhaled as little water as possible.
He wasn't a total monster.
Unable to hold her breath any longer, the panic set in. Catherine's nails broke the skin on his forearms as she continued to claw at Jimmy. Her lungs felt as though they were on fire and the water only added to the burn. When the bubbles ceased and her movements calmed, it was only then did he pull her up.
Catherine attempted to rip his hands from her neck as she began to bawl. She wasn't sure which sentiment to process first as she was beyond overwhelmed and having a hard time comprehending what was happening. For the first time in her life, Catherine found herself wishing for a beating. A couple of bruises and a broken nose seemed like nothing compared to the hell Jimmy had just put her through.
This was far from his previous attempt to only hurt her, this was Jimmy using pure terror to once and for all prove that he would always have power over her. That no matter what she did, he was always a step ahead of her—a lesson she needed to quickly learn.
Tears streamed down her face as he loosened his grip. Catherine barked as water spilled from the corners of her mouth.
"Ya do as yer told, Catherine, an' I'm tellin' ye ta never so much as even think of bein' wit another bloke." Jimmy roared.
Without thinking, Catherine spat back. "Go fuck yer'self."
Hearing her speak to him like that only enraged Jimmy more, and he absolutely lost his mind. Releasing one hand, Jimmy cocked his fist back and sucker-punched her once in the nose. Being popped square in the face was the kind of screeching pain that short-circuited Catherine's brain. No matter how many times she had been socked before, there was no preparation that could prepare her for the lightning strikes that engulfed her body. The fact it had happened with no warning only exasperated the effects. As blood exploded from her nostrils and streamed down her mouth, chin, chest, she was left dazed for several moments. When Catherine finally realized what happened, her response was nothing like what Jimmy had expected. He was sure she had a mental break.
She was laughing at him.
Jimmy clenched his jaw so hard he was sure his teeth would shatter. The sound of her sinister cackle was only made more menacing by the sight of blood washing over her whitened teeth.
"Oh, Jimmy," she crooned. Catherine was smiling, but her eyes were dark and dead. "Yer a fuckin' pathetic excuse fer a man."
Catherine tried to stop herself from saying those words, but all impulse control was out the window. Her temper was just as bad as Jimmy's and Patrick's, but what got her in most trouble was her love of instigating.
The sharp metallic flavor she had tasted too many times before, filled her mouth as she further taunted. "Me Da hits harder than that when he's piss drunk."
It was unclear why she kept going, knowing full well it would only end badly if she ran her mouth. A part of her didn't care anymore. Catherine was so used to being a personal punching bag and she sickly wanted to see just how far she could push Jimmy. Fiona had once told Catherine, out of spite, that she was no better than the rest of her comrades; full of rage with a twisted thirst for violence. Maybe she was right.
Catherine was full of shit in her assessment that Patrick could hit harder than Jimmy, and her mind was swimming in pain. When his second punch landed on her mouth, it split her lips and gums open. She gathered as much blood as she could, spitting it right into his face.
What Jimmy failed to recognize over the last several years, was that her initiation weekend in South Armagh had changed her forever. No longer did she cower and take beatdowns without defending herself. In his attempt to break her down and build her up as a Provo, he created himself in her.
Jimmy was fighting a raging battle that he was internally losing. There was truth in that he didn't want to hurt her, but she was pushing too far. Just like Catherine, Jimmy never stepped away from a fight.
Not bothering to seal her airway this time, Jimmy roughly grabbed her wet hair at the crown of her head. His fingers tangled into the roots as he once again drove her under the water. Catherine didn't have time to hold her breath, so the moment she slid under, she sucked copious amounts of the red-tinged water through her nose. It burned worse than before as she felt it fill her lungs, and it wasn't long until dizziness set in.
This time, she didn't fight back. She accepted her punishment, realizing it was far better than taking a bullet in each thigh as that was the Provo way of handling malfeasance. As hopelessness began to grip her the longer Jimmy held her under. The only thing she could hold on to was that he didn't have it in him to take it too far. Catherine knew he was only pushing her to her limits, but her limit was quickly approaching and he showed no sign of letting up.
Her stomach quickly became bloated from the water she was now swallowing. Jimmy held her under for what seemed like an eternity, and it wasn't until he noticed that she was slipping out of consciousness did he pull her up.
Letting go of her hair, Jimmy stood up and stepped out of the tub, sending bloody water sloughing out of the tub. As she leaned over the edge, whooping, he smacked the space between her shoulder blades. He watched indifferently as she spewed water onto the floor.
"Ye'll be fine," he assured. Not even a slight hint of concern could be found. "Been through'a hell of a lot worse, a chuisle."
