Without warning, Spidey put two of its hands on the sides of its head in an exaggerated manner and cried:

"OH NO!"

"What?! What's wrong Spidey?!" Daniel asked in surprised alarm.

Spidey pointed at the Dominion cruiser with a thrusting finger and replied:

"I recognize that ship!" Spidey whirled on Eppy, clear irritation on its face, and growled accusingly:

"That's your crazy sibling's vessel! You deliberately called that bastard, didn't you?! DIDN'T YOU?!"

"I didn't call Dante on purpose! It simply came on its own! Not that I mind it coming, of cours-" Eppy began but was swiftly cut off.

"Yeah right! I know how you two are! You both planned this just to annoy me!" Spidey snapped accusingly.

"You're just being paranoid." Eppy stated in a soothing tone.

"You're paranoid." Spidey muttered, folding its two front legs/arms. It sighed loudly.

"Arioch must REALLY hate me." Spidey said resignedly.

The others looked on with a mixture of confusion and amusement.

Eppy cocked its head, as though it was listening to something, then cocked its head to the other side and an unknown voice started speaking as though out of thin air. It clearly was speaking in Eppy's language.

"Who is that?" Jack asked, puzzled.

"That would be Dante, Mr Jack." Spidey answered.

"Dante, speak American. This is a Two-Leg ship." Eppy chided.

"Oh, well so it is. The technological level of the sphere behind you doesn't seem up to the task of creating such a vessel." Dante replied.

"It's one of their ally's spacecraft, you thundering twit." Spidey snapped.

"And of course you've got grouchy-ass tagging along like a lost puppy. What a surprise." Dante retorted.

"YOU LI-" Spidey started only to be hushed by Eppy.

"Let's play nicely, children. This is an emergency." Eppy scolded.

"Fine." Spidey and Dante responded grudgingly.

"Anyway, please proceed to the main docking bay at the back of the cruiser. I'll meet you there with all the bells and whistles." Dante said.

"Understood." Teal'c said.

The Tel'tak came about and headed for the stern of the massive warship.

"Spidey, I'm curious. Why did you say you only have the ability to command warships? Are you highly placed in your military command?" Jacob inquired curiously.

"Eppy and I both are. We're part of what you would refer to as the Joint Chiefs, as General Hammond and Samantha explained it." Spidey explained.

"Okay. Wow." Jacob answered.

"Highly placed just doesn't seem sufficient, does it Jacob?" Jack commented, with a wry grin.

"No, Jack. It doesn't." Jacob replied.

"How is Neil doing?" Artemis asked.

"Probably not very well, I would imagine." Apollo answered.

Neil was sitting at the table, with Buffy, Willow, Xander, Dawn, Joyce, Faith, Helen, and Athena hovering around him, attempting to console him. There was a mixture of emotions playing out on his face, ranging from rage to frustration on his features.

Giles was in his office with the artifact they had discovered at Ryan Landon's home, speaking with the Council over the telephone about said artifact. The rest of Neil's personalities were in the hallway or the library, wandering in and out and keeping a sharp eye out for any threats.

Except for Diana. She had been observing Neil with a laser focus.

"I'm completely lost as to what's been happening lately." Ares commented.

"Aren't we all man?" Neptune responded.

"Dead people becoming those things and attacking the people they used to know, Neil and Hera's physical changes, that weird-ass thing we found at Ryan's house, I mean what is this shit?!" Bellona growled.

"There's clearly a connection, I mean, there has to be, but what?!" Taryn wondered.

"Unknown. There is not enough data to properly theorize." Lilith offered.

"Ain't that the truth." Hera said.

"Yeah. I wonder if Giles is having any luck?" Zeus said, clearly thinking out loud.

"I kind of want to go into the office and ask him, but that would be foolish and an unnecessary distraction." Artemis remarked.

"Yes. That would be quite pointless." Diana agreed, as she joined the conversation, glancing back at Neil as she spoke.

As they continued their discussion, they were unaware of their observer, who was listening in from a room down the hall.

It was the silver-haired woman.

Minerva, she asked herself, what have you stumbled into?

What is happening in this town?

And who are all these other people around Mother?!

A few of them I know…

...but the others?!

What the actual fuck?!

As they approached the stern, a portion of it opened up to receive their vessel. It didn't open a door so much as an opening simply...materialized...before them.

They entered the Dominion cruiser, leaving the endless void of space behind them. The hole closed after they entered.

SG-1 and Jacob/Selmak just stared.

The inside of the massive starship was even more alien than the outside. There was constant movement of spheroid and cylindrical structures everywhere, and even the...floor…? shifted and pulsated with mysterious movements. The whole area was awash in colors unknown to them.

And the extraterrestrials! There were so many and none of them could be described as truly humanoid. They were staggering in their variety of shapes and sizes!

"Mom. I don't think we're in Kansas anymore." Jack whispered.

Eppy and Spidey regarded Jack curiously, looked at each other in puzzlement, but then shrugged.

"There's Dante, friend Teal'c. Please land near it." Eppy asked.

"As you wish." Teal'c responded.

The Tel'tak landed in a graceful and practiced maneuver. The back of the ship opened, and SG-1, Jacob/Selmak, Eppy, and Spidey exited and made their way to the welcoming party.

Their greeters were composed of several Long-Necks, Many-Legs, a couple of beings the Tau'ri and Jaffa couldn't even begin to describe, and oddly, a calico tomcat.

A large Long-Neck, sickly green in color stepped forward and spoke:

"What's up? I'm Dante, the captain of this here ship. I would tell you the name of it, but you wouldn't be able to pronounce it, so I'll refer to it as the Retribution. Welcome aboard!"

"Hi. I'm Colonel Jack O'Neill, and this is Major Samantha Carter, Doctor Daniel Jackson, Teal'c, and Jacob Carter/Selmak." Jack replied.

"Hello." Sam greeted.

"Hi there." Daniel said.

"Greetings." Teal'c chimed in with a short bow.

"Hi." Jacob said.

"Hello all. Why did you put a dash between Jacob Carter and Selmak Jack?" Dante asked in clear bafflement.

"Well, Jacob has a symbiote and its name is Selmak. Fascinating right?" Jack explained casually.

"Yes, very. Symbiosis is not unusual here, but also uncommon." Dante answered.

"Really? Around here not that uncommon." Jack answered with an impish smirk.

Dante grinned playfully at Jack.

"Oh, I like you already."

"Oh goodie." Spidey muttered.

Dante looked them over a moment, and then said:

"Damn. I feel thick."

"Why do you say that?" Sam asked.

"I just realized you were female and Jack, Daniel, Teal'c, and Jacob/Selmak are male. Boy it's been a long time since we met your species." Dante responded.

"I know what you mean Dante. I had forgotten as well." Eppy agreed.

"I'm guessing genders are also uncommon in your reality?" Daniel inquired.

"Indeed they are Daniel. I almost made a faux pas."

"Well it's not like you're the sharpest knife in the drawer." Spidey groused.

"Ah, how I missed your feeble attempts at insults." Dante replied with a sarcastic smirk.

Dante then pointed behind it with a welcoming "come with me" gesture and stated:

"Shall we?"

Giles came out of his office but was immediately startled as Neil barged up to him and demanded:

"Well?! Anything?!"

Giles put up his hands anxiously but Athena and Buffy intervened immediately.

"Hey Neil, back off a minute. Let Giles speak." Athena said gently, putting her hand on Neil's now massive arm.

"Neil, come on. It's going to be ok." Buffy told Neil softly, taking his hand in hers.

"Come on big guy." Faith said as she placed her hands on his broad back.

Neil released a tense breath of air from his lungs, and he nodded slowly.

"Sorry Giles. Just feeling a little anxious." Neil informed the Watcher apologetically.

"It's okay Neil. I understand. I would feel the same in your situation." Giles replied kindly as he lowered his hands. Then he said:

"The Council has never heard of this artifact but they informed me of an ancient book that was said to have been written in pre-human times. This volume is concealed in a crumbling ruin thirty miles from here. I asked for directions and realized it must lay near Ryan's house. The other Watchers said this book contains potent and forbidden knowledge, and if any work would possess information about the object we found, it would be that book. They gave me a description of the ruined building, the tome in question, and how to unlock and translate it."

"Why didn't they claim it before now, if they know its location?" Helen wondered.

"Excellent question Helen. Apparently it is guarded by a seemingly invincible construct, and that thwarted their efforts in securing it." Giles answered.

"Ain't that typical? They're too wimpy so we have to do their dirty work." Hera grumbled.

"Looks that way, don't it?" Neptune agreed.

"Then we shall depart for this place in the morning. But until then, I would advise withdrawing to Neil's castle for the evening." Diana suggested.

"I would think that is an excellent suggestion Diana. Let us do so. We could all use some rest." Giles agreed.

And with that, they secured the library doors and made their way to the castle.

Their journey did not go unobserved….

As Dante led them deeper into the Dominion cruiser, Teal'c and the people from Earth (and Selmak) marveled at the strange sights they witnessed.

Some of the areas were clearly off-limits to unauthorized personnel, as there were clearly guards stationed at what had to be doors. The sentries were wearing what appeared to be sealed armor of some kind, and were holding long weapons of some sort, probably rifles or carbines.

Others seemed open to everyone, and there was a considerable flow of traffic to and from them. Dante explained each location as they passed by. There were armories, restrooms, break rooms, sensor and weapon stations, locker rooms, and so on.

While they journeyed, Sam absentmindly picked up the calico tomcat from earlier and started petting him. The cat regarded her curiously.

"Wow, miss Sam. You sure are forward!" Spidey commented with a chuckle.

They all halted at that.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, puzzled.

"You're petting a member of my crew." Dante answered with a smile, pointing.

"Huh?!" Sam replied.

"Are you talking about the cat?!" Jacob exclaimed.

"Yes, yes I am." Dante responded.

Sam looked down at the cat, who looked back at her, and then winked.

Startled, Sam nearly dropped the tomcat!

"Careful, I bruise easy." the cat joked, in a distinguished French accent.

"You can speak?!" Daniel expressed loudly.

"Why, of course I can. And so can you." the cat replied smoothly, looking at Daniel.

It jumped out of Sam's grasp, turned and winked at her with an impish grin, then ran off.

"Okay...that...was different." Jack commented.

"Unfortunately, around these parts, all too common. Damn cats never shut up." Dante explained.

I'm starting to think Dante is their version of Jack. Daniel observed, with no small amount of amusement.

After a moment, they continued.

"Are you okay, Major Carter?" Teal'c asked.

"Yeah...this place is just so...surreal!" Sam replied.

"Where are we going anyway Dante?" Jacob asked curiously.

The environment shifted without warning, startling the newcomers.

"Right here. This is the bridge." Dante responded, with a majestic sweeping gesture of one of its tentacles.

"How did we get here so quickly?!" Sam wondered out loud.

"The ship morphed around us by manipulating multi-dimensional spaces. Basically, it teleported us here." Dante explained.

"How advanced are you people?!" Selmak asked.

"Absurdly so friend Selmak." Eppy said.

"Now that we're all here, I want to show you something." Dante told Jack and company.

"What's that?" Jack inquired.

"There's a huge city of some kind on the dark side of your satellite." Dante replied.

"A city?! On the Moon?!" Jack said in astonishment.

"Yes indeedy. Bring up the image." Dante ordered the bridge crew. There was motions and movements of pale energy and matter, and a picture took shape.

On said picture, was what could only be a massive metropolis. Its architecture was oddly reminiscent of

European medieval buildings, but somehow twisted and demonic in appearance.

"Where did this come from?! We've had probes on the dark side and they found nothing like this!" Sam pondered out loud in sheer amazement.

"That's because it was buried miles underground until something caused it to rise to the surface, from what our scanners have told us. They've told us something else too." Dante stated.

"What's that?" Daniel questioned.

"The monster that threatens us all, the Darkness? It came from this here city, specifically from this pit in the center." Dante answered, as it gestured at the bridge operators and they changed the picture to the pit. It was immense in size and seemed bottomless.

Everyone, even Eppy and Spidey, stared at Dante, then at the hole, then back at Dante.

"It was imprisoned in that opening, wasn't it Dante?" Eppy observed.

"Yeah, little bro, it was, which means the way to stop it must be down there too." Dante replied.

"When do we leave for the surface?" Jack asked.

"As the old saying goes, Jack my man, no time like the present." Dante answered.