It was the first peaceful moment Abbey Bartlet had experienced in thirteen hours. After returning to her hospital room, the nurses and doctors finally left her alone for a few minutes with her newborn daughter. She held the infant in her arms, gently running her hands over the baby soft skin, admiring her daughter's beauty. She thought about her other children, and how their sizes had all varied at birth. Liz had been nearly two pounds larger, at eight pounds and one ounce. Ellie had been exactly eight pounds, while Zoey had hardly been four pounds. The differences were remarkable.
"Hi, sweetheart," Abbey whispered. "Alexandra Lane Bartlet. I hope you like the sound of that, because once we make it legal, you're stuck with it until you're eighteen. Alexandra's a mouthful for a little one like you, I know. That's why you're going to be our Laney Baby. When you're rich and famous, you'll be known as Lane Bartlet. That's a little better, isn't it"
Abbey smiled and kissed her soft forehead tenderly.
"Oh, Lane. You don't know how happy I am to be holding you. It's been a tumultuous journey. I'll explain at all to you in detail someday. To make an excrutiatingly long story short, you were a bit unexpected, my dear. Your father and I got the shock of our lives when we found out about you. We found out the day after your big sister, Liz, announced to us that she was pregnant. She had her baby a few days ago. Annie. Someday you'll resent the fact that your niece is older than you, but you'll get over it.
"I suppose I should introduce your zany family to you before they come bursting in here. Talk about the shock of your life. I'm sure you'll fit right in, but consider this a warning, love. Where should I begin? I'll go ahead and warn you about your grandmother first, as she'll be your caretaker a lot of the time, while Mommy goes to work. She's a bit on the looney side, like the rest of us. She used to be…rather joyless. Not a lot of fun. But now she's expanding her horizons, I guess. Don't let her teach you how to gamble. That's what you have me for.
"Now, your oldest sister is a pill. I've never been able to decide whether she takes after me or your father more. But she's certainly a pistol that one. It'll be awhile before you're able to say her name, but it's Elizabeth. Lizzie to you, I'm sure. Unless you take after Zoey, in which case you'll be calling her Lizzlebit for the first three years of your life. Be careful, because if you do that Daddy will make fun of you.
"Then there's Miss Eleanor. You don't have to worry about her; she'll be absolutely in love with you. Come to think of it, you look a lot like she did when she was born. I don't think you'll have any trouble bonding with Ellie. She's a little shy and a little on the quiet side, but you should take advantage of that, because she's the only one. If you need a moment of peace, and I don't doubt that day will come, I'd hang out in Ellie's room. Just a word to the wise.
"You'll have to watch out for Zoey though. She's the mischievous one. And word has it she was hoping you'd be a boy, and hell hath no fury like Zoey Bartlet scorned. Oh, don't fuss, honey. I'm just kidding. Zoey's going to smother you with attention. You'll be her porcelain baby doll. She'll probably try to dress you up in funny outfits and hats. Then again, Daddy's going to try that too, I'd imagine.
"Speaking of Daddy…he's the zaniest one. He'll hit you with a history of national parks if you get caught standing still for more than a second, so beware of that. He can teach you much more than I can though. I'm good for a tidbit about women's lib now or then, or if you need to know how many bones are in the human body. But it's your father who'll teach you everything else, whether you want to learn or not. He'll probably start boring you with useless information right away, while you're sleeping. Don't get me wrong, he's a brilliant man. Possibly the kindest, most intelligent, wonderful, loving man you'll ever come across throughout your entire existence. You're a lucky girl, Lane Bartlet, because you've got the best father God ever created, which is a wonder when you consider the father he lived with for eighteen years. Sometimes he has his doubts, so be sure to remind him how fantastic he is from time to time, because sometimes Mommy forgets.
"Well, I guess that brings us to…me. Hi. I'm your mother, and will be for the next fifty years or so, God willing. Maybe I'm not June Cleaver, but I do my best. Sometimes I come home from work a little late, and I can't always be there when you fall down. I wish I could, sweetie. But someone will always be there. If it's not me, it'll be your father, your sisters, your grandparents, your aunts and uncles, cousins, godparents. There will always be someone there when you need help. That's the Bartlet family guarantee, kiddo. And it's one thing I'm proud of"
Abbey's monologue was abruptly cut short by a sudden knock on the door. She sighed, and held the infant closer to her.
"Come in"
Jed opened the door a crack and stuck his head in.
"Hey, beautiful"
"Hey yourself," she replied.
"Oh. No, I was talking to the baby," Jed said, with a smirk.
She laughed and rolled her eyes.
"Thanks, Jed."
"You ready for some company?"
"The gang's all here?" She questioned.
"And how"
"All right. Send in the troops"
Jed nodded.
"On your command"
He flung the door open wide, gesturing for his family to pile into the room. Within seconds, Abbey's bed was completely surrounded by exicted, squealing Bartlets, each of the them oogling at the new baby.
"As usual, the mother gets no recognition," Abbey commented, laughing.
Jed gave his children the eye, and they instantly remembered what they had been instructed to do.
"Oh, yeah! Daddy said to tell you that you're amazing," Zoey announced.
Abbey raised an eyebrow in her husband's direction. Jed frowned at his daughter.
"Thanks for that, Zo"
"Mom, you're awesome!" Liz exclaimed.
"Yeah, Mom, you're incredible," Ellie added.
"Fantastic," Catherine said.
"Gee, thanks, guys. I can tell that came straight from the heart," Abbey said.
"It did," Jed whispered, leaning in to gently kiss her lips. "You're incredible."
Abbey blinked back the tears that were beginning to form in her eyes.
"Okay, enough sap. Please return to your attention to this adorable child"
"What's her name!" Ellie questioned.
Abbey looked up at her husband.
"You want to tell them"
"You can do it"
"Her name is Lane," Abbey announced. "Alexandra Lane Bartlet"
"Hi, Laney!" Zoey said, excitedly. "I think she likes me"
"I know she does," Jed replied.
"She looks kind of like Ellie," Liz stated, observing her baby sister circumspectly.
"Really!" Ellie said.
"She does, actually," Catherine agreed. "She looks just like her father"
Jed laughed.
"And therefore like her grandmother"
"That's right!"
"Well…all I can say now is, welcome to the family, Lane!" Catherine said, jubilantly.
"Yay!" Zoey cried, clapping.
"Welcome to the family, Laney," Ellie said, dropping a kiss on her baby sister's forehead.
"And good luck!" Jed joked.
"Jed!" Abbey said, her frustration quickly dissolving into laughter.
"So," Liz said. "When do we get to go home"
