A/N: What can I say, it's a Sasu/Naru! Enjoy!

Sorry, this is a tad short! Don't murder me.

Dream Lover

A tired and irritated Sasuke sighed as he sipped his sake quietly at the village bar. He had just returned from a tedious and stamina-draining mission and the only thing he wanted to do was have a nice drink before heading home to his comfortable and warm bed, which he had missed dearly while on the mission.

'No stupid fan-girl Sakura,' he thought as he took a long sip of sake. 'No perverted nosy Kakashi and best of all, no noisy, idiotic Naruto.'

But, unbeknownst to Sasuke, he was being closely watched in the nearby trees, where two people were discussing…

"Kakashi-sensei, are you sure this will work?"

"Sure! It worked on Irkua!"

"But it's Sasuke for god's sake! I mean, he's stupid, but not that stupid!"

"Come on, Naruto! Don't be such a wussy! You never know, you may end up taking home more than what you bargained for!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes as he set down his cup. The two men in the trees were not what you would call discreet.

"Good god, can I even have some frickn' sake without being spied on!"

Kakashi and Naruto spun around and faced Sasuke, eyes wide. Naruto grinned, blushing.

"Oh, S-Sasuke! I-I didn't even notice you!"

Sasuke rubbed his aching temple. Somehow, Naruto had always managed to give him a headache.

Naruto and Kakashi jumped swiftly down from the tree and sat on the stools next to Sasuke, who felt even more irritated and angry at having one rare peaceful moment being crushed by these two idiots.

"Can I help you?" He snapped, gesturing to the tender for another drink.

Naruto looked anxiously at Kakashi, who simply nodded and gave him the thumbs-up sign. "Well, uh, you could help by letting us buy you a few more drinks."

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "And just why are you being so generous all of the sudden?"

"Ummm…" Naruto hesitated for a moment. "Well…I just want to be thoughtful to my loyal and hard-working teammate!"

Kakashi smacked his forehead and Sasuke snorted. The pair was definitely up to something…but hey, what the hell? Free drinks were included in part of their little scheme, and Sasuke wouldn't have minded not having to pay the bill.

The bartender set down a fresh cup of sake in front of Sasuke, who quickly picked it up and looked at Kakashi and Naruto. He took a sip, not taking his eyes off them.

"Feh, fine with me. Hey, bring out ten more, tender!"

Naruto and Kakashi grinned at one another. Their plan was going perfectly…

Two Hours and Twenty Cups of Sake Later

"Ya know…" Sasuke slurred, leaning over the counter and grabbing the collar of Naruto's jacket. "Ya ain't surch a bad perrrrson, Dobeeeeee."

Naruto grimaced. Sasuke was staring to smell a bit. "Uh, heh heh…"

Sasuke grabbed an empty cup and shoved it in Naruto's face. "Have sooommme, Dobbbeeee…"

Kakashi quickly pulled the drunken Sasuke off of Naruto. "We're-we're fine with water, Sasuke."

Sasuke spun around and stared at Kakashi. "Okkkayyy…whateva yer say."

He suddenly burst out laughing and almost fell out of his stool. Naruto caught him and gave his sensei a worried look.

"Sensei, I'm not sure if this is working-"

"It's okay, Naruto," Kakashi assured him, helping set Sasuke back on the stool. "Just-just butter him up a bit."

Naruto's face was full of doubt, but he took Kakashi's advice. "Umm…you know, Sasuke, you really are pretty good-looking for a guy."

Sasuke laughed again and slammed the counter. "I know, I'm perty dang sexehhhhhhh!"

He let out another loud laugh that sounded like a cross between a goose honking and a poodle yapping. Naruto shrugged but Kakashi urged him to continue.

"Umm…so what do you think of me, Sasuke?"

Sasuke stopped giggling and looked at Naruto. "Youuuu, dobbbeeee? Wellllloooo…" He attempted to scratch his chin, his fingers hitting his nose and one of his eyes. "Yer perty hawrt fer a guy, tooooooo…And yer nads are frrriiickn' HUGEEEE!"

He honked once again. Kakashi raised his brow and glanced at Naruto.

"Since when has he seen your you-know-what?"

Naruto blushed slightly. "Well, we've had to go to hot springs and share rooms together…"

Sasuke suddenly grabbed Naruto again and stared him straight in the eye. "Dooobbbeee…"

Naruto gulped. "S-Sasuke…"

Sasuke was silent for a moment before bursting out "Will oo MARRY me, Dooobbbeee?"

Naruto's mouth dropped. He looked over Sasuke's shoulder and hissed at Kakashi "What do I do! I was expecting to maybe take him home and screw with him, but I wasn't expecting to get engaged to!"

Kakashi grinned and laughed. "Say 'yes', say 'YES'!"

Naruto sighed and smiled back at Sasuke. "O-okay, Sasuke. I'll marry you."

Sasuke grinned and swayed. "Heh heh heh…coollll…"

And with that, he fainted in his new fiancé's arms.