Author's note: Klaroline AU human fusion multi-chap VERY loosely inspired by the movie, I Want to Marry Ryan Banks (Reality of Love). Caroline reluctantly goes on a reality show to date a spoiled movie star only to realize that she's fallen for his cocky manager instead.


"The springtime of Lovers has come,

that this dust bowl may become a garden"

— Jalāl al-Dīn Muḥammad Rūmī (Rumi)


Never trust a conversation that begins with, "So, don't be mad." Especially if it's your best friend who says it. Caroline had been ecstatic that Bonnie had flown all the way from Mystic Falls, Virginia, to visit her in California, but she should've been suspicious when her friend suddenly insisted that they meet in LA. Caroline lived in San Francisco, in a neighborhood consistently voted in the top five places to live, and extensively had planned out touristy-but-not-too-touristy activities for them to do together.

And then Bonnie just changed her mind. Bonnie hadn't changed her mind since their sophomore year in high school when she dumped Jeremy Gilbert because Enzo St. John suddenly shot up five inches that summer.

Raising a skeptic eyebrow, Caroline asked, "Uh huh. And what am I not being mad about?" Bonnie mumbled at first, not quite meeting her eyes, and she heard 'limo' and 'reality'. "Yeah, let's try that again. Bonnie Bennett, you tell me right now what you did!"

"Fine. So, there's this reality dating show that's getting ready to start filming and Imayhaveappliedforyou and the producers really like you and I brought you here for a final interview before casting." Holding up her hands, she hastily added, "And I promise it's going to be a totally classy show."

Blue eyes went wide in disbelief, and for a moment, Caroline forgot she was in the middle of a crowded, upscale hotel lobby when she shouted, "Seriously?!" When crowds of people whipped their heads around to stare, she hastily lowered her voice, dragging Bonnie to a quiet alcove with a marble water feature. "How could you do that without asking me?"

Suddenly, Bonnie's green eyes flashed and Caroline was reminded of the time Elena Gilbert stole her Brotherhood of the Five boy band lunchbox. Bonnie's wrath was legendary. "Caroline Forbes, how dare you ask me that?! I watched you rebuild your life after Matt and Elena blew it up and you've worked your ass off to get where you are I'm so damn proud of you — but I've also watched how you've completely shut down when it comes to dating again."

Caroline immediately felt her cheeks grow warm with embarrassment. And maybe a tiny bit of shame. It had been over a year since Matt had called off their engagement because Elena was suddenly single again. Some people just couldn't leave high school behind. Bonnie had been Caroline's rock, and somewhere between hugs and bitch slaps, her friend inspired her to start over. At first, it had been hard to move across the country and away from the only home she'd ever known, but she also had healed faster because those memories weren't constantly in her face.

"Bonnie —"

"Damn it, Caroline," her friend interrupted, "You deserve to be loved! I just want my best friend to be happy!"

It was the unshed tears she heard in Bonnie's voice that gave her pause. She'd be forever grateful to Bonnie for convincing her to leave Mystic Falls even though she knew it would affect their friendship. FaceTime couldn't replace their sangria Sundays. "You DO realize that there's nothing realistic about reality TV, right? Or classy, for that matter. And you seriously think I'm going to find true love on a reality dating show?"

"I KNOW you will! I have a good feeling about this," Bonnie said eagerly, "And you know my feelings are NEVER wrong!"

Well shit. Caroline couldn't argue with that kind of logic. She couldn't explain it and always teased Bonnie that she must be a secret witch because whenever her friend 'got a feeling', things just had a way of working out the way she said they would. She still hadn't lived down the time she thought Bonnie was crazy for predicting she'd beat Elena for the Miss Mystic Falls title.

Besides, she WAS lonely. She lived in a beautiful, vibrant city full of creative, exciting people and she'd been on exactly ONE disastrous date since her engagement had been called off. Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she relented...sort of. "I'll go to the interview and I'll try to keep an open mind. But, if the producers piss me off or they want me to do something that compromises the youth program, I'm DONE. Deal?"

"Deal," Bonnie said with a knowing grin, tugging her back toward the main lobby where a limo seemed to be waiting for them in the circular driveway. An enormous stretch limo painted an obnoxious pink and dotted with white hearts.

Yeah, real classy.


Sibling murder was starting to seem like a viable option. Klaus ran his fingers through his curls in irritation, scowling at his foolish younger brother. "You can't back out now, Kol. Tedious contracts have been signed, the show's cutthroat legal team has closed even the most obscure of loopholes, and I'm fairly certain you've already spent your advance on that obscene sailboat you'll never use."

"Nonsense, brother. I've every intention of taking her out for a proper christening," Kol replied with an impish wink.

Klaus skeptically retorted, "You've never been sailing in your life."

"Details."

"You've gotten seasick on every ridiculous industry yacht party you've ever stumbled into."

With a cheeky grin, Kol shrugged, "Perhaps a time or two I might've overindulged a bit."

He rose from the conference room chair with a snarl, slamming his hands on the table in front of Kol as he shouted, "Bloody hell, Kol! The drunken club brawls, the endless lawsuits from paparazzi you've punched, your vulgar groupies posting orgies all over their social media — that's your appalling reputation in the industry!"

His dimwitted brother carelessly waived off his diatribe with, "The industry and my loyal fan base expect a certain amount of puckish fun."

"Puckish fun? You pushed Damon Salvatore offstage at the Emmys! He broke his foot in three places and it delayed production of that '70s burlesque biopic to the point that they replaced him with his brother!"

"You and I both know nothing was going to save that rubbish movie from itself — not even Stefan's self-righteous hero hair."

Klaus shook his head, fury blazing in his gray eyes as he snarled, "You've never taken your career seriously. You whine to me to clean up your childish messes and get you the parts you think you deserve — but at this point, NO ONE in Hollywood thinks you deserve anything more than a few walk-on roles on throwaway cable sitcoms."

Hurling the contract across the table, Klaus swore, "As your manager, I'm telling you now, this is your LAST chance to rehab your image and unfuck your career! This reality dating show is a bloody gift and I had to call in EVERY favor I had to get you this gig!"

For once, Kol was uncharacteristically quiet as though seriously considering Klaus' words. The serious expression that crossed his boyish face was unusual, and Klaus felt a sliver of hope that he hadn't miscalculated his irresponsible brother's desire to fix his ruined career.

"Alright, Nik. I get it. And...I am grateful for everything you've done," Kol quietly murmured. Tracing a finger along one of the contract's pages, he suddenly returned to himself, a mischievous grin lighting up his face once more as he teased, "Besides, what's not to like — an entire reality dating show focused on me dating 25 women at once — just imagine the possibilities..." he trailed off with a gleeful cackle.

Suddenly standing up, he eyed with interest the back of an attractive blonde as she gracefully glided down the hall. "And don't worry — I'll be on my best behavior — especially if a tasty bit like that is interested in saving me from myself."