If Jane was in a better state of mind, she might have noticed how attractive he was or the fact that he hit on her but she was too preoccupied. She set her things down and pulled a chair over to Maura's bed and sat down.
...
She looked Maura over and her stomach turned. She felt sick over the fact that Maura was laying there because of her. That Maura was laying there instead of her. She felt tears welling up in her eyes again. This time, she didn't try to hold them back. The only person who was there was the only person she felt comfortable sharing her emotions with, even though it was still hard for her. The only difference this time was that Maura would not be able to comfort her.
"I'm so sorry, Maura. I-I just didn't think. I couldn't let that maniac run you over. I couldn't let you get hurt but look what I did," she grabbed Maura's hand. "I ended up hurting the person who means everything to me. I am supposed to protect you and I hurt you and I'm just...so sorry. I love you." The last part came out almost as a whisper as if Jane was afraid of Maura hearing it. Tears continued to flow and Jane rested her head on Maura's lap, a stark contrast to when Jane had the honey blonde's head in her lap earlier.
Nurse Rachel had come to check on Jane, not knowing that Dr. Parker had just stopped in, when she heard someone speaking. She stopped just outside of the room not wanting to interrupt. She recognized the voice as Jane's and waited outside the door. When she heard Jane's tearful apology, she decided it was probably best to come back later. She wasn't trying to eavesdrop but she heard the last part even though it sounded like Jane had intended for nobody to hear it. She gave Jane a sad smile even though the Detective couldn't see it. That was all she needed though for confirmation of her suspicions and she walked off.
...
Jane had not intended to fall asleep but she was so exhausted, both physically and mentally, that her body gave her no other choice but to succumb to it. Maura had awoken before she did. She was very groggy and in a lot of pain. She reached for the source of her pain with her free hand and winced when she touched the bandaged wound. She tried to sit up but there was something weighing down her legs. Jane.
She looked down to find the Detective with her head in her lap, one arm under her face, the other still holding Maura's hand. The Doctor smiled. She has no idea what was going on and if she were alone, she would surely start panicking but Jane was there and that meant she was safe. She looked around in an attempt to gauge her surroundings. A hospital? Why was she here? What happened to her head? How long has she been here?
All of these questions began swirling around in her head that was already reeling from the pressure and pain of her injury. Just as she thought she might pass out again, Nurse Rachel entered. She could see Jane still sleeping, smiling to herself at the position she was in, and greeted Maura very quietly. She figured Maura would appreciate a more quiet interaction as well.
"Good Morning, Dr. Isles. My name is Rachel, I am the Nurse assisting Dr. Parker, the ER Doctor who took care of you. We also helped Detective Rizzoli with her injuries."
"Jane is injured, w-what happened?" Maura asked, attempting to sit up.
"There, there, Dr. Isles," Rachel said, as she rushed over and held Maura's shoulders down.
"It's best you try to relax. You sustained a very serious head injury."
At this point, Jane had awoken from all of the movement she felt.
"Maura?" She asked, suddenly very alert as if she did not just spend the night sleeping in a chair at Maura's bedside.
"Jane. W-what happened?" Maura asked while reaching for her head.
Jane grabbed her hand, stopping her from touching the wound.
"There was an accident, Maura. Do you remember anything?"
"Not much, I remember hearing your voice. You were saying my name and then...and then..."
She trailed off.
"I'm so sorry, Maura. This is all my fault," Jane said as she dipped her head back into Maura's lap out of shame.
The honey blonde instinctively placed her hand on Jane's head and began stroking hair.
Nurse Rachel wanted to step in. She wanted to tell Dr. Isles that what Jane was saying wasn't true. She wanted her to know that the Detective actually saved her life and that she could tell how much Jane loved her and would do anything for her. But that was not her place. She needed to remain professional. Instead she realized that she should let them have this time together. Maura seemed ok so her morning check up could wait. She politely excused herself from the room and told them that she would be back to check on them shortly. Jane lifted her head and looked at Nurse Rachel. She had a look that Jane couldn't quite explain but that she somehow understood. It was as if they had an entire conversation without any words. A feat that Jane was surprised she could accomplish, especially in this moment, with a total stranger. Finally understanding Rachel's peculiar behavior from earlier, Jane gave her a nod and she was gone.
Jane looked back at Maura. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes just like they had the night before.
"Jane, Jane what's wrong?" Maura asked as she reached a hand out, covering Jane's cheek.
Jane closed her eyes, leaning into the contact. Maura's hand was cold and her grip felt weak. Jane could feel Maura's arm begin to shake so she covered Maura's hand with her own and brought it back down to her lap. She wrapped her other hand around it rubbing them together.
"Your hands are so cold," Jane said with a sad smile.
"Due to the blood loss, my body requires more blood to keep my vital organs warm, leaving my extremities to..."
"I know," Jane softly cut her off.
"Maura, what do you remember from last night?"
"Not much, I'm afraid. I remember being called to the scene. I believe it was on the corner of Maple and... Maple...and...Grove."
Jane felt a ping in her chest when Maura struggled to recall the details.
"And you were there and Frankie. And Susie. And I believe we had a John Doe who was murdered..."
Jane nodded her head, encouraging Maura to go on.
"...and, and that's all I can remember."
Jane shifted her position so that she was sitting closer to Maura.
"Maura, a truck, that was out of control, drove straight through our crime scene."
"Oh my...what about the evidence?"
"I know you can't help but make sure your evidence is pristine but don't worry about that right now, ok? The driver..."
She trailed off and closed her eyes.
"The driver went straight for you."
"Me? ...Why?"
"I don't know. I don't know if they were drunk or asleep or if..."
"...if they were trying to hit me?"
Jane opened her eyes and looked into Maura's.
"Yes, but Frankie, Frost and Korsak are on it and they told me they'd keep me updated the whole time. Shit..."
"What is it, Jane?"
"I fell asleep. I haven't looked at my phone all night. They are probably worried sick."
She wanted to reach for her phone but thought better of it.
"Maura...I...I had to..."
"You pushed me."
Jane was looking down but her head snapped up to meet Maura's gaze.
"How did you know that? Do you remember?"
"It's coming back... in pieces."
"Maura I'm so sorry. I'm the reason you hit your head and ended up..." she gestures broadly to the room "...here."
"Maura, I never meant to hurt you. I would never do anything to hurt you. I...I lo..."
She was cut off by Maura repositioning her head. Even though Maura was groggy and out of it, she managed to give Jane her signature head tilts that said 'You better stop speaking now before I come over there.'
"Ouch," she said letting go of Jane's hand to reach for her head.
"How bad does it hurt?"
"Badly," Maura corrected her.
She didn't know if it was the exhaustion or all of the emotions she was feeling but Jane couldn't help it, she erupted into laughter. Maura joined in, only lasting a few seconds before she needed a rest.
"Please don't make me laugh, it hurts," she said as her chuckled subsided.
"That's gonna be really hard because you know I can't go a minute without making jokes in inappropriate situations."
Jane smiled at Maura and took her hands again.
'I'm so glad that you are ok. I thought I'd lost you there for a moment. I-I don't know what I would do without you."
"I'm right here, Jane." They silently stared at each other.
Nurse Rachel returned hearing only the last bit of their conversation. She entered the room smiling when she noticed Jane pulling her hands away from Maura's as if they were just caught doing something they shouldn't be.
"Alright Detective, I'm going to have to clean and dress Dr. Isles' wound now. I can show you how if you'd like. I assume you're the one who will be taking care of her?"
Jane eyed Maura. "As long as she doesn't mind that my bandage tying skills are not as perfect as yours," Jane joked.
"I think she's in good hands with you, Detective." She gave Jane a sly wink, earning a smirk from the Detective and Maura was oblivious to all of it.
Rachel showed Jane exactly how to clean Maura's wound and bandage it back up. Maura was in pain but she marveled at how gentle Jane could be sometimes. The Detective was seen as cold and angry by most people but not Maura. She was one of the few who got to see this side of Jane and it made he heart swell.
"Alright, now I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask for some privacy, Detective. We need to get Dr. Isles bathed. Unless, of course, it's alright with you if she stays, Dr. Isles?" Rachel asked, raising an eyebrow.
"You know what," Jane said quickly, "I just remembered that I have a very upset mother sitting in the waiting room and I fell asleep in here last night. If I don't update her soon, I'll need a hospital room of my own." She laughed awkwardly. "Plus I have to call work and get up to speed on the case."
She looked at Maura who gave her a sad smile but nodded with understanding. She looked at Jane as she struggled to stand up. She grabbed a set of crutches and started hobbling towards the door. Her right side was now exposed to Maura and she could see all of the cuts and scrapes that covered her body. Maura simultaneously felt horrible that Angela had waited there all night and also that Jane was injured. Mostly that Jane was injured if she was being honest with herself. She also found herself feeling sorry that Jane was so upset. She knew that Jane felt guilty but didn't know why. Maura was alive because of her. Maura was pulled from her thoughts as she heard Jane yelling over her shoulder.
"Ma brought you a bag too, Maur. I'll go fill her in and grab it. If it's anything like the one she brought me, I'm sure it'll have all your favorites in it."
Jane stopped at the doorway, turning around. She gave Maura as bright of a smile as she could manage. She tried to communicate her love to Maura through that smile. Maura smiled back and gave Jane an approving nod. They lingered like that for a moment until Rachel moved into view and broke their eye contact. Rachel knew what she was doing. She felt something between Jane and Maura that she was sure they felt too. They just didn't know it yet. Rachel, being the amazing Nurse that she is, decided that going above and beyond for the care of Dr. Maura Isles was just what they both needed.
