Warning: Strong language has been used in this chapter.
Life With Derek: The Secret
o4o
Derek knew her far better than Casey cared to admit. They had met during a time in Casey's life when she yearned for change. She wanted to experience life to the fullest. To fall in love, enjoy a day without homework or school burdens, and to just enjoy herself in a carefree environment. Running into him at that party had turned out to be just what she had needed. His reputation with women had been recited to her more times than she could count; Chelsea was taking every precaution to try and keep her away from Derek. Turns out, that was all a waste of time, because the moment he set eyes on her, Casey was sure they weren't going anywhere else.
Now, she could feed you a line about love at first sight, but let's not kid ourselves. In fact, when she first saw him, her thoughts were nothing involving love. It was more of, "Does that guy realize that the bimbo behind him has less IQ than her bra size? How pitiful is that?" So she wasn't entirely head over heels for him upon first seeing him. He had made quite the introduction though. Most guys weren't as forward or calm like he was. She was surprised how easily he kept up with her in their small battle of wits. He wasn't her first choice for the start of her new life; but he was just the right person to bring her out for some fun.
As Casey sat at her computer, carefully re-typing her English essay, she had to remind herself to stay on task. She had been acting a little more polite to Derek lately. It was unusual for her to feel like she could drop her angry and vicious tirade against him. He had hurt her more than she cared to think of, and she felt justified in treating him how she did. He seemed just as happy to return her angry attitude; throwing insults right back in her face. She couldn't help but regret ever meeting Derek; not then and not after their parents married. After the fiasco that was their 'relationship' she had felt somewhat better in knowing that she'd never have to see him again. That reassurance was shot to hell though when she found out he was her new step brother. You can imagine it didn't go well.
Before Derek, it wasn't as if she lived a completely meaningless existence. Far from it really; at her school, she was popular. Not for the same reasons Derek was; she didn't instill fear in those younger or less cool. Casey was sweet, nice, and helpful, causing kids to like her and feel inclined to be her friend. She had a good, large, comfortable group of friends around her. As usual, her grades were absolutely spotless; she didn't get any less than she deserved. As for her love life, well aside from a few very disappointing dates, she really only had Derek to look back on, which was a very bad mark on her reputation as far as she was concerned.
There were days when she truly felt like Derek was a great guy; when he wasn't holding up the cool facade like a shield. Moments where she got to see the real him. The day he called her, she knew he was using his 'every-girl-wants-me' voice, but she had a feeling she could bring something better out of him. She remembered their first date, with a sense of happiness. In fact, most of their relationship had been perfect; all except the ending. Oh how she despised him for that last day. She hated herself for falling for his antics; for falling for him. Pulling away from the end, she remembered the beginning.
Derek had called a half hour earlier, inviting her to watch him play a game of hockey with a couple friends of his. It was mid-November and the air was rather bitter. Pulling on a warm jacket and some gloves, she waited for him to pull up in her driveway. She would've asked her mom to drop her off, but she had gone out on a date with someone. Luckily, Derek had been able to borrow his friend Sam's car. She never asked if he had his licence, but decided not to nit pick as long as he got her there and back in one piece.
Casey heard the rumble of the car pull up and hurried to the driveway. He was halfway towards her door when she stepped out. Locking the door behind her, she walked over to him. He looked pretty cute with his hair fashioned in a mess, and his cheeks a little rosy from the cold air. Running his hands together, he grinned at her. "Ready?"
"Always," she said, walking to the car.
Their destination was a large ice rink in the middle of the city, where he and all his hockey buddies met. He turned some music on, but when he noticed her wrinkled nose, he switched it off. Leaning back into the car seat, he glanced at her occasionally.
"So," she said, smiling lightly. "How often do you invite girls to watch you practice?"
"If I say you're the only one, you're going to call me out on lying," he said, smirking.
"You're right, I am," she said, her eyes flashing with amusement.
"So, in all honesty, I invite most girls to the rink," he said, before chuckling.
"Ahhh, so this is like a ritual." Nodding, she smiled. "Well, I'm not one to end tradition."
Glancing at her, he half-smiled.
There was something in the way he looked at her that made her shiver slightly.
Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair. "So, how often do you give you number out at parties?" he asked.
"You were the first," she told him, sincerely. "Must've been your wonderful name knowing ability," she teased.
Chuckling, he shook his head. "What can I say? Some of us have talent, some us don't."
Laughing, she looked out the window at the approaching rink. He pulled in beside a line of other cars. A group of guys were warming up on the ice. Loud rounds of laughter echoed in the air.
"Don't worry," Derek assured her. "They won't bite." Taking her hand as they walked towards the rink, he winked. "That's my job." Showing her the best place to sit, he left to get his skates and gear on. Leaning back in her seat, she wasn't surprised to see a group of girls all scattered around and watching.
A tall, green eyed blonde walked over and sat down beside her. "Hey, I'm Kelsy," she greeted. There was something in her demeanor that was off and Casey immediately knew that this wasn't one of the nice girls. "Are you here with Derek?"
"Derek?' she asked, feigning as if she had no idea who the girl was talking about, hoping she'd take the hint and go away.
Fluttering her eyes, she stared at her with a fixed smile. "Yeah, you know, Derek Venturi. Playboy; cocky, good looking, arrogant, makes out with anything with legs. Cause you better watch out with him," she warned.
"Not ringing a bell," Casey said, shaking her head.
Suddenly, there was a thud against the walls around the seats. Derek stared at the blonde with a little less than hatred. "Kelsy," he said her name, with fake enjoyment. "What are you doing bugging the nice girl?"he asked, his eyes flashing.
"I'm not bugging her Derek," she said, annoyed. "I just thought I'd come by and see which guy she's here for. I assumed it was you, but she said she had no idea who I was talking about."
"Well your description was off," Casey said sweetly. "See, here I thought was with the really funny, nice, interesting hockey player, Derek. Not the one that pissed you off for whatever reason that you have to go around verbally attacking girls you don't know."
Scoffing, the blonde stood up and stomped off.
"I hope you don't cause me to get this kind of attention everywhere we go together," Casey told him, chuckling.
"I make no promises," he said, grinning. "Interesting tactic though," he told her. Nodding, he turned and left to join his team.
After a long while of watching him sweat and knock guys to the ground, Casey found she actually didn't mind hanging around. Derek was an incredible player; getting almost every single shot in the goal. She found herself rooting for him, though not as noticeably or loudly as the other girls hanging around. Every once in a while, he'd stop in to ask her for a good luck kiss. Which she complied to, though nothing too intimate. When asked if it was a tradition, he grinned while skating backwards, away from her. "It'll be one now," he called to her.
When everyone had finished playing, the guys began to leave with whichever girl had come with them. Casey made her way down to find him sitting on a bench, unlacing his skates.
"All done?" she asked. Sitting down beside him, she looked around and found they were the only one's left.
Nodding, he smiled at her. Stopping his unlacing, he looked over at her. "Do you want to go out on the ice with me?"
"I don't have any skates," she said, shrugging.
Reaching around her, he pulled his bag out. "I have an old pair that might fit you," he offered. Pulling them out, he handed them to her.
Lacing them up, she stood up feeling completely off balance. Feeling his hand around hers, she let him guide her out onto the ice. Waiting for herself to relax, she found herself becoming more steady on his skates. It'd been a few years, but she was quick at getting her bearings back. He led them around the rink in a large circle, his hand still holding hers warmly.
Cocking his eyebrow, he smirked at her. "What do you say to a challenge?"
"What kind of challenge?" she asked, her lips turning up in a smile.
"One on one. If I get two goals in, you have to come out with me tomorrow. If you get two goals in, I'll have to go out with you tomorrow," he said.
Rolling her eyes, she chuckled. "That's the same thing. Either way we're going out tomorrow."
"I'm glad you want to," he said, grinning. Moving in front of her, he skated backwards. "So what do you say?"
Tipping her head, she pretended to think it over for a minute. "You have a deal, Mr. Venturi." She held her hand out for him to shake, taking it, he pulled her closer.
"How about a kiss for good luck?" he asked, looking into her eyes, happily.
Leaning up, she pressed her mouth against his in a short but nice kiss. "You'll need all the help you can get," she said, before moving past him and going towards the box for a hockey stick. "You shoot first," she called out to him. Skating towards the goal easily, she positioned herself. Slapping the stick down on the ice heavily, she grinned at him.
"Have you played before?" he asked, moving a puck to the center of the rink.
"This is Canada," she said simply. "What kind of Canadian are you if you haven't played hockey?"
Laughing, he began moving the puck down the rink. "True," he said, nodding. "What position did you play?"
"Center," she said, shrugging.
"That's my position," he told her. Moving to the side, he shot the puck past her into the net. "And there's a good reason why," he said, proudly.
Skating out, she cocked her eyebrow at him. "Lucky shot," she said, shrugging.
Chuckling, he shook his head. "You're not a sore loser, are you?"
"I'm not a loser period," she told him. Positioning herself in the center, she began making her way down the rink. Swerving back and forth, she tried to keep his eyes focused on her, trying to calculate which side she'd shoot from. "Worried?"
"Not really," he said. "Outcome's the same."
"So the great Derek Venturi isn't worried about being beat by a girl," she asked, raising her eyebrow.
"That's not going to happen," he said, confidently.
Letting the puck go, it soared past his leg, just missing his block. Smiling down at him she winked. "We'll see about that, hot shot."
Standing up, he brought the puck down the rink and skated in a circle. "So where do you want to go on our date?" he asked, smiling at her.
"That depends," she said, tipping her head.
Shooting the black piece of hard round rubber, her was surprised to see her block it with her stick.
"I don't know if I can be seen in public with a guy who's had his stick handed to him by a girl," she said, grinning cockily.
"I guess you won't be dating any of my teammates then," he told her, making his way to the goal.
"I guess not," she said, laughing. Standing up straight, she skated down the center and stood in front of him. "How badly are you going to take it when you lose?" she asked him, her voice quiet.
"What's the consolation prize?" he asked, staring down at her with half-lidded eyes.
Leaning up, Casey pressed her lips against his, sucking his top lip gently. Moving her stick slightly, she pushed the puck into the goal. Pulling back, she could see their breath mingling in the air, turning white from the cold wind. "I win," she said.
"I can deal with that," he said. Lifting his hand, he threaded his fingers in her hair, leaning down to her again."
Casey shook her head, pulling away from her thoughts. They may have been great together in the beginning, but he lived up to his reputation in the end. Staring at the computer moodily, she wondered what Derek was writing for his essay. Since all of her homework was now done, she decided to listen to some music.
Rolling her chair away from her desk, Casey looked through her CD collection before deciding on her beloved Alanis Morissette. Pulling her "Jagged Little Pill," disc out, she popped it into her stereo. Stomping over to her bed, she relished in the angry-with-all-men music. Remembering that Derek had a date the next night just made her angrier. Locking her door, she turned the music up louder, letting it envelop her.
"I want you to know, that I'm happy for you, I wish nothing but the best for you both, An older version of me, Is she perverted like me, Would she go down on you in a theater, Does she speak eloquently, And would she have your baby, I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother..."
No doubt Derek would have his fun with little Miss Popularity, Felicity Taylor. Casey not only despised the girl to begin with but now she had to deal with her old jealousy reviving itself. She never wanted to have these feelings for him; she wanted to push him away and never think of him again. She wanted to hate him for the rest of her life.
"Cause the love that you gave, that we made wasn't able, To make it enough for you to be open wide, no, And every time you speak her name, Does she know how you told me you'd hold me, Until you died, till you died, But you're still alive..."
The words matched their horrible relationship almost perfectly. True to her word, Casey had fallen for Derek in just a few short days. It seemed absurd to think it now, to know that she had fallen for his deceptive nature. She had always thought herself a perceptive person. She didn't think she'd ever make a mistake like she did with him.
Her hands curled around the comforter underneath her, as her anger sunk in. Her eyes burned with the tears already milling in her eyes. Her throat became raw and pained. She wished she could just forget him; forget their time together. She didn't want to feel anything for it anymore.
"And I'm here to remind you, Of the mess you left when you went away, It's not fair to deny me, Of the cross I bear that you gave to me, You, you, you oughta know..."
Instead of being the forgiving and kind Casey she had always been, she showed him every day they lived together just how much she despised him. Every word he spoke, she turned around on him. Every look he gave her, she threw into his face. Every nice thing he might do, she asked about suspiciously. She made it known just how little she trusted him, with even the smallest tasks. That's how it was with them now; there was no good feelings between them. Only hate and anger lived inside her for him now.
"You seem very well, things look peaceful, I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know, Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity, I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner, It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced, Are you thinking of me when you fuck her..."
When she saw him again, she didn't know what to do. But as if nothing happened, he fell into pretending he'd never known her before. He'd flaunt his many new girlfriends in front of her face, rubbing it in that she wasn't them. Every time she had to see him with some other bimbo, she found herself falling farther and father into her anger. She found the love she had once felt slowly dying away and being replaced, rather easily really, with the cruel and blind anger she threw in his face at every corner.
"Cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me, And I'm not gonna fade, As soon as you close your eyes and you know it, And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back, I hope you feel it...well can you feel it..."
True, she hadn't dated anyone else since him. In fact, she was considering not dating until school was completely out. That's how much Derek had hurt her; how much he had ripped her heart out and stomped on it. She just couldn't take the thought of going through it again. She couldn't let herself fall for another Derek Venturi. She wouldn't let it happen; not ever again.
"And I'm here to remind you, Of the mess you left when you went away, It's not fair to deny me, Of the cross I bear that you gave to me, You, you, you oughta know..."
Despite just how hard she had tried to forget about Derek completely, which was hard given that she lived with him, she had to admit to herself that those times in the past with him had been some of the best moments of her life. The times when she had the real Derek in front of her. The funny and sweet Derek; the one who's kiss made her knees weak. That Derek was the one that she had fallen in love with, not the one she had come to know. Not the one who had hurt her so very deeply. And as selfish as it was, she hoped that he knew just how much pain he caused her. She hoped he had to live with the fact that he had broken her heart, and that it pained him to know he did.
oTBCo
Thank you all to who reviewed! I'm really glad you're enjoying it so far.
