A/N: EDIT: Flames will be flames, I suppose. I just wanted to make folks smile for the holidays, but noo...

T_T

Hello~! Sorry for the delay~~!

READ THIS NOTE, PLEASE. 'Tis important.

Once more, we're sticking with the "Embers" rule for this story.

If folks don't like this, it'll be deleted. Meaning that if the story itself ain't popular? POOF! Gone. Completely. I'm working two jobs during the holidays so I barely have time to write; as such, I cannot afford to write something folks don't enjoy. So by all means, speak up! Your voice matters! Make yourself heard! As ever, reviews are the fuel that sustain me. Without them I cannot write a single word. Simple as that.

Two jobs keep me absurdly busy, and I can't bring myself to write something folks don't like.

Now lets move onto your questions, comments and concerns. They'll be brief this time.

Q: Soooo...how bad is the aftermath going to be?

A: Consider this! Kakashi spiked the punch. Everyone attending the dance drank said punch. And I do mean everyone. As I'm sure you've realized, the "book" is more than it seems. Roman may be keeping an eye on it in HIS world, but it has a mind of its own.

And, quite simply put, the book will not be denied.

You thought things were crazy before?

*cackles*

Q: When will Adam realize just how screwed he is?

A: *zips lips*

Q: Can't wait for that scene. You know the one.

A: Weeell, I've been putting it off for awhile, but it was meant for this chapter, soooo...

Q: Ha! Salem's being ignored!

A: Careful, she might throw a tantrum.

Q: This is still single pairing, right?

A: Yes.

Q: More chaos! More anarchy! FOR CHAOS!

A: Read and see!

Alright them, I think I've kept you long enough.

Hope you're ready; because from this point on? Weeell...!

As ever, I own no references, quotes, themes or memes. Now off we go.

"Don't look at me! You went and opened the book!

Ain't no stopping this crazy train now!

Away we go~!"

~?

Pages

"Unbelievable."

Kakashi clasped both hands behind his back, pivoted away from the inferno currently consuming a good fourth of the Beacon's dormitories, then turned face Sasuke. The last Uchiha met him stare for stare, even as a half-dressed Cinder knelt on the floor beside then. She tried to raise her gaze and was summarily glowered into submission by both.

"Words cannot possibly hope to express my disappointment in this moment."

As far as rebukes went, the last Uciha thought it a shallow one. Then again, he wasn't used to being scolded. Hatake was hard to read at the best of times.

"In all fairness," he began, "I didn't intend for this to happen. Roman was going to shoot her. I prevented it."

"I'm quite alright with that." His mentor's brow furrowed. "Less so this."

He jerked a thumb over his shoulder, where even now the fire crews were just bringing the flames under control. Three hours. One hundred and eighty minutes to get the blaze beaten down, and still Naruto was nowhere to be seen for any of it. He didn't want to know what he was up to.

Maybe he'd taken his chance to scarper. He wouldn't blame him.

"Subtlety, my student." Kakashi tutted, waking him up to reality once more. "Perhaps you should learn it You had one job. Stay under the radar. Don't make a fuss." he cast another glance back, watching as a blue-haired boy begrudgingly brought some manner of water semblance to bear on a burning building. "I'd expect something this from Naruto, but you...?"

Cinder scoffed in annoyance. For once, Sasuke found he agreed with her. "This from the man who spiked the drinks?"

"Hmm?" Kakashi didn't bat an eyelash. "I haven't the foggiest idea what you mean. You're lucky I was nearby to cover for you and make a certain someone...forget." quick as a flash he flitted a finger forth, jabbing him in the chest. "And speaking of cover, I'll warn you. Sakura is looking for you."

Strangely enough, Sasuke felt a thorn of concern prick at his heart at that. He wasn't sure why. "Where is she?"

"Helping Atlas put the fires out." their mentor waved a hand toward the still smoldering dorms. "Its earned her a fair bit of goodwill...and time for to get your story straight."

"Sakura...?"

Even he wasn't so foolish as to miss the sound Cinder made. It reminded him of a child having their favorite toy taken away.

"Is that going to be a problem?"

"It would be," Kakashi dug a finger in his ear, "But someone seems to have intercepted her. And where is this Roman fellow?"

"He fled in the chaos." Cinder rose to the occasion, despite the glare it earned her. "He still has the book."

...I see." Much to Sasuke's chagrin, his old teacher actually winced a little. "Right, about that. That wasn't the only reason I cornered the two of you. The gateway on our side may have...malfunctioned."

He didn't like that tone. In promised all manner of unpleasantness. "How so?"

Cinder was far quicker on the uptake. Almost alarmingly so.

"You think others may have come through."

"Possibly. And don't try to change the subject. I've heard all about you, young lady." Kakashi rounded on her. "Naruto's not told me good things. Would you kindly be quiet?"

The flame-wielder wilted beneath his words. Kakashi had the effect when he was angry.

Sasuke saw someone approaching and held his tongue. He said nothing; indeed, he held his tongue as Kakashi continued to rant at Cinder, blissfully unaware of the blond, green-eyed monster creeping up on him. A better student would've pointed out the peril to their mentor. Warned them of what was to come. But he wasn't feeling like a good student right now. And so his lips remained sealed...

"How rude of you to leave me like that."

...until Glynda's hand clamped down on Kakashi's shoulder.

Hatake absolutely frozed. "Well, I was disciplining my student and his accomplice-

"I see no such student."

Kakashi looked back. Sasuke had fled, and Cinder with him. All that remained was a faint plume of smoke. Blast.

Glynda's smile was all teeth.

Kakashi's confidence shriveled before that smile.

"Now then, I believe you owe me an explanation, good sir...


(.0.0.0.)


"Its a conspiracy, I tell you!"

Roman slammed down a suitcase, spraying lien in every direction. He snatched up a few wayward bills and crammed them in anyway. There was no time. He had to move. Had to run. Flee! Fly! Anything that got him the hell away from here! Preferably before that fire bitch hunted him down and burned him alive.

Sprawled on a nearby couch, Neo waved a hand.

"Yeah, I know the kid's on our side," he grunted a little as he hefted the briefcase, "But I didn't think his friend would stick it in that crazy witch!"

Neo didn't budged

Nope, nope, nope! Not having it! He'd taken his shot, gone one look at that purple demon and decided he wasn't having it. How on Remnant Cinder had managed to work her way into the good graces of that thing, she'd never know. No, scratch that. He didn't want to know!

Ignorance was bliss!

"They want crazy?" He flicked a glance to the book, left unattended on the counter. "I'll show 'em crazy!"

There had to be a way to send these monsters back. Because that's what they were! Monsters! If more of them

He fiddled with the clasp...only to realize he'd left it open. Uh-oh.

A bead of sweat ran down his brow. "That can't be good...

M-Maybe he was overthinking this. Surely someone hadn't come through last night while he was sleeping, right? Or several someones?

As if sensing that very thought, the pages burst into light.

Roman dove on them with a wail. "Not again!"

Neo looked on and hummed happily.


(.0.0.0.)


Qrow creaked an eye open.

"Ugh, how much did I drink last night...?"

Against his better judgement, he planted his hand in his mattress and sat up.

.

..

...

Almost immediately, he found himself with a handful of something soft. And warm. And not a bed.

Unbidden, his fingers squeezed.

A soft, feminine sigh trickled through his ears.

Every fiber of his being tensed. Fight or flight warred within him and tore his mind to pieces. His first instinct was to holler at the top of his lungs; flail out of bed like a loon. Somehow, he suppressed it. Instead he slowly, carefully, withdrew his hand. Only then did he peel back the sheets. Only then did he dare look down. blinked back at a buxom blond woman, with a strange jewel-like mark in the center of her forehead. She was also utterly naked. As was he.

"Huh." he muttered. "This is usually the part where my Semblance shits the bed."

As if on cue, the woman opened her eyes. "Ach, what a night..."

"..."

Qrow blinked.

Tsunade blinked back.

One word rose between the two of them.

You have two guesses. First two don't count. "Shiiiiiit."


(.0.0.0.)


How indecent!

Winter slammed the bathroom door behind, clutching a thin sheet to her chest and nothing else. Said chest was currently heaving a mile a minute. Red hair. Green eyes. That was all she'd glimpsed before panic set in. Before she'd bolted. Oh gods above and below! She'd brought someone back to her quarters. Into her bed! When?! Where?! How?! She'd only had a few sips of punch! Surely it wasn't that much?!

Gaara sighed.

"Was it something I said...?"


(.0.0.0.)


"I'm alive?"

The man blinked.

Pale eyes blinked again. He touched his chest. And yet there was no hole there. All he found was smooth skin beneath his battered attire. That shouldn't be. He'd taken the hit for him. And her. He'd died in their arms. He remembered dying. He had felt the slow creep of oblivion touch him and then nothing at all. If there was an afterlife, he wasn't aware of it. Yet here he was now. As if someone or something had simply reached out and plucked him forth from the beyond, patted him on the back, and flung him...wherever he was.

"No, that's not important. Where am I?"

Was the war still raging? He had to know. He must know.

And whose bed was this? Was that a bunk bed hanging above him?

He rolled over. Startled pink blue eyes met his, terribly close. Silence stretched between them. Neither moved.

Finally, the "dead" man took the plunge and spoke into it. "...this isn't what it looks like. I have no idea how I got here."

Across the room, Nora absolutely shrieked.

A pillow struck poor Neji in the face.

"GET AWAY FROM MY RENNY!"


(.0.0.0.)


Why was Beacon on fire?

Naruto craned his neck back to regard the distant plume of smoke rising from the main campus with some concern. It was quite visible, even way out here in the city; a rising noxious spire that seemed to curl around the school's tower, threading its way upward to darken the very clouds themselves. He could hear the sirens from here. Worse, he had a feeling he knew who had started it.

"For crying out loud, Sasuke...its only been a few hours!"

Ordinarily, he would be the first on the scene; the very first to find the trouble and deal with it. Even now his feet were itched to run. Unfortunately he had problems of his own to deal with. So did Blake. This was the greatest foe he'd ever faced. All his strength, all his stamina, all his speed...it meant nothing before this enemy. Madara and Kaguya themselves would've wept when faced with such a terror.

"Well," Kurama drawled, "It was nice knowing you. I'll put some flowers on your grave."

Naruto whimpered a little on the inside. 'Traitor! Help me out here!'

"He who runs away lives to fight another day!"

"Now, now," Kali cooed as she reached across the table to pat his arm. "I'm sure they have it under control."

Ghira merely grunted. It was not a happy grunt. "Listen to your mother, dear."

That enemy he mentioned?

Blake's parents. Plural.

Parents who had burst into their room some hours ago only to find them tangled up in bed together. Parents who had promptly dragged them out of Beacon, into Vale, and were presently intent on giving them both the nth degree at some outdoor restaurant he didn't recognize. The rest as they say, was history. He didn't know why they were here or how they'd caught wind of them, only that they had. Perhaps he and Blake had lazed about in bed a bit too long, but was that really their fault. Really? Was it?

Yang was involved in this somehow. Had to be. He just knew it.

The rest of Team RWBY was sitting at a nearby right over there for crying out loud!

Blake's hand found his beneath the table, fingers threading through his own like fine twine. Ghira saw it and growled; the noise low and deep in his throat. It sounded like doom.

"My little Blakey, all grown up!" Kali squealed. "Oh, I'm so proud! Is this your boyfriend?! He's so handsome!"

Ghira grunted. "I'd like a word with him. Alone."

Naruto felt a slow heat crawl up his face. "Lets not and say we did.

"Then I'll be blunt." Ghira quirked a dark brow to that effect. "Do you intend to use protection?"

Naruto's throat closed. "Not subtle at all...

Blake whined. "Daddy, no!"

"Daddy, yes." the giant faunus remained unfazed. "Your mother may be alright with this, but you're far too young to have little ones running underfoot."

Ruby choked. Weiss groaned into an arm. Yang absolutely sniggered.

The silence that followed would prove nothing short of ominous.

Kali looked left. Right, now. "Have the two of you...?"

Blake groaned into the table. "Kill me now."

Kali squealed into it. "You have!"

Shadows fell over Ghira's face. "I see."

A hand fell on Naruto's shoulder.

"I'm dead, aren't I?"

This was it. His final hour. His life flashed before his eyes.

And yet for all that, there was a small part of him that reveled in the attention. Was this what it felt like to have parents? To have them fuss and fawn over you, embarrass you at every turn, knowing they meant well? A thorn of sadness and sorrow tugged at his heart. For a wild moment he imagined something that could never be. Kushina and Minato -Mom and Dad!- would've loved this. He barely knew them, had only really talked with each once really, but he knew in his heart that they would've adored Blake. He'd never missed them more than in this month.

Kurama creaked an eye open. "I really am sorry for that."

...I know. Just stings a little, is all.'

Only then did he realize just how silent it had become.

Everyone was looking at him. Ghira had recoiled, looking terribly startled.

"Come now," he sputtered, "I wasn't actually going to hurt you. There's no need to cry..

"Huh?" the blond touched a hand to his cheek, alarmed to find it damp. "Why am I crying? C'mon, its nothing to worry about." when they closed in his raised his hands to ward them off. "I'm fine, really! Just thinking about, um...my folks, ya know?"

Kali regarded him intently with narrow golden eyes. "That's a fair point. Where are your parents, son?"

Naruto looked away, and scratched at his cheek. "They, ah...died. When I was born."

Ruby gasped. Weiss closed her eyes. Yang looked physically pained. Everyone else flinched, save Blake. She laid her head on his shoulder in silent companionship. Her hand squeezed his again below the table, then lifted it and planted both their palms atop said table for all to see. The gesture meant more to him than words ever could. Unbidden, he found himself leaning into her.

She kissed his cheek. "...are you alright?"

"I'm great!" he forced a laugh, wearing a smile he didn't quiet feel. "I was just thinking, I would've liked for them to meet you, ya know?"

"You poor boy!" Kali launched herself across the table like a missile and wrapped them both up in a crushing embrace, squeezing them both. "Feel free to call me Mother whenever you like! Why, we're practically family already! Isn't that right, Ghira?"

He didn't budge.

Kali glared golden daggers at him. "Ghira Belladona! You get over here right now and hug your son-in-law! Right now!"

Naruto and Blake choked on hair. Moreso when Ghira circled the table and laid a hand on his shoulder. It felt...gentle this time.

Even then Blake proved more vocal than both her parents combined. "This is...nice, I suppose, but I have to ask. Why are you here?"

Kali smiled softly. "Why, for the festival, of course!"

"No," her eyes narrowed to golden slits. "I mean HOW did you find me? I didn't tell you where I went!"

"Oh, that?" Kali tittered a little. "One of your teammates were kind enough to tell us. I believe her name was Yang." she touched a hand to her cheek. "Such a nice girl."

Naruto went terribly still. "Is that so...?"

Yang whistled innocently in the background and made a point of walking the other way. Blake made pitiful Blake noises. Followed by very angry Blake noises.

"Excuse me," she wriggled out of Kali's grasp, rose from her seat and reached around behind her back." I need to commit murder...

Yang flung herself into the street, cackling all the way. "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"

Blake brandished Gambol Shroud with intent. "I DON'T INTEND TO!"

Naruto stumbled up after her. "Save a piece for me!"

Yang yelped and fled. Together, they gave chase.


(.0.0.0.)


"You're certain?"

In the darkness, the messenger delivered her report.

...I am." Illia bowed her head as she knelt. "They were seen together."

"Get out." he turned his back on her. "Our timeline has moved up. Make the preparations."

"But Adam...! Its not ready."

"I said get out!"

Adam gripped Wilt until he felt it creak in his grasp. He hadn't trembled like this since he was a raw recruit. Betrayal. How it stung. How it burned. How it raged. This pain, it felt like it would eat him from the inside out. He didn't let it. Instead, he let it forge him into something stronger. Hate coalesced into a pearl of pure spit in his chest. How dare she. How. Dare. He didn't hear Illia make an excuse and retreat. Didn't hear any of it. Already his thoughts were turning inward, to darker things.

He rose on trembling legs.

Bad enough that Cinder and Torchwick had lost their nerve. Bad enough that the plan had to be altered. But this...?

He was not some dog to obey human masters. Call it off? Never! And now Blake...Blake...BLAKE!

A roar tore out of him.

"TRAITOR!"

Wilt tore free from its scabbard and obliterated his desk with a. Blush barked, annihilating the wall behind it. Papers sprayed into the air. Concrete slashed across his masked face, spattering against aura. Adam ignored it all, chest heaving, shoulders shaking. There was a part of him that longed to lash out more, to spend his wrath here, wrought within the fires of his fury. It took a supreme effort of will to sheathe his sword instead; nearly all he had, but he did so regardless. Now was not the time. But soon. Soon. Very soon indeed.

There would be blood for this.

Blake would see the truth.

They would all see.

A/N: Read this note, would you kindly? It explains things.

Told you the book was broken. It went and revived a dead man! Ah, Adam, you're really not prepared, but hey, its your life to lose. Illia, you should really run while you can...

Once more, we're sticking with the "Embers" rule for this story.

If folks don't like this, it'll be deleted. Meaning that if the story itself ain't popular? POOF! Gone. Completely. So by all means, speak up! Your voice matters! Make yourself heard! As ever, reviews are the fuel that sustain me. Without them I cannot write a single word. Simple as that.

Seriously, I work EVER DAY now and feedback keeps me going.

So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...

...Review..Would You Kindly?

And enjoy some previews!

Yup. Portal's gone bonkers.

(Previews)

Sakura butted her head against Cinder's. "Who are you?"

"My, my, I could ask you the same thing...


Qrow gulped.

Had he really slept with this broad? What a rack!

...got anything to drink?"

Qrow offered her his flask. "Sure...?"

She ripped it from his hand and knocked it back. "Speak of this, and you die."

He gulped a little. "Yes, ma'am!"

The door crashed open. "Hey, Uncle Qrow! I wanted to ask-AAARGH! MY EYES!"


"Do you intend to marry my daughter?"

Naruto nearly choked on his spit. "Big cat daddy say what now?"

Its a simple question, son." Ghira settled into the seat opposite him. "I'm asking what designs you have on her."

"I ain't got no designs. Blake and I are...

Heat rose to his cheeks.

...complicated."


"You?" Naruto's jaw clicked open. "You can't be real. You died...


The train sped ahead.


A bead of sweat ran down Ozpin's brow.

"Flirting was far less destructive in my day."

Bah, all these new faces were surely harmless...right?

After all, it wasn't as if they were facing an invasion or anything. Right?

R&R~!